Synopsis:
Travelling Parents: Guide to Building a Connected Family Life
Practical strategies for families when one parent works away. Part 1 is on the importance of naming your family structure to reduce stress and avoids future regret.
This episode (Part 2/3) highlights the power of using language that reinforces family experience and teamwork.
Keywords: travelling parents, connected family life, parent away from home, long-distance family
The first of a 3-episode series:
- Episode 89 Recognise it for what it is
- Episode 90 Reframe as WE
- Episode 91 Re-enforce The Bond Across the Distance
Episode 2 Reframe as WE
1. Do a Language Audit
Do you emphasise teamwork and working together as a family?
When I speak with people who work far from home, and when I speak with their spouses at home, what I am hearing is one family narrative, one family story.
Even though you are not under the same roof, the way that people talk is ‘my family’, ‘this is what we are doing for the family’
Example: Colleen EP 71 about transitions in global life
And then there's the emotional side. So for things, things like grief, you can power through for a while, but at some time, some point, I know our family, we've been learning it's better to just give it some space because it's going to come anyway.
2. Family
The overwhelming majority of participants of my research for my Masters mentioned the word ‘family’ over 10 times during their interviews although the questions related to what their childhood was like with a travelling parent, communication with their travelling parent, how they knew their parent cared
“I think the important thing is finding family rituals in the sense of figuring out what are things you enjoy doing together as a family’
Parents working as a team also strongly came out in the interviews.
3. Family Project
Whether one of you frequently travels or lives and works in another county, consider this from a project management perspective and treat it as a whole family project. It is a project after all, with stakeholders: you and your spouse, your children, certain members of your extended family, close friends will all be ‘key stakeholders’ in your family project.
“Key stakeholders can make or break the success of a project. Even if all the deliverables are met and the objectives are satisfied, if your key stakeholders aren’t happy, nobody’s happy.” ADRIENNE WATT
Create joint meaning, work towards a common goal, and celebrate the wins along the way, even at a distance!!
Contact Rhoda: rhoda@amulticulturallife.com
Receive news regularly on new episodes of HTFA Podcast and on new events and resources. Subscribe to my newsletter.
Buy the book: Holding the Fort Abroad
Your partner's job opportunity in another country seemed like an exciting idea, but lengthy work assignments mean you're holding down the family fort - alone.
OR Your partner is working and living in another country, and you feel like you are shouldering all the home responsibilities alone.
You may be wondering:
- How can we be a family when we're miles apart?
- Can I cope, alone, when troubles arise?
I believe there are answers to the above questions, and the answers start with you. In this context, it's more important than ever to invest in yourself, to care for yourself, to set your own goals and to watch yourself grow. Equally important is to nurture your relationship with your partner and learn to parent together.
