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Episode 8: Play Personalities & Why They Matter for Couples
Episode 819th January 2026 • Play Dates for Couples • Leanne Chesser
00:00:00 00:06:47

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Do you know your play type or play personality?

In this episode, I talk about what play personalities are, a bit about each of the types I created and why it matters that you know yours.

You can discover your play personality by taking the “What’s Your Play Personality?” quiz.

After you take the quiz, you’ll also find out more about the type and what it actually means for bringing more play, fun and connection into your relationship.

Transcripts

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Do you know your play type or play personality? We're gonna talk all about that in today's episode as well as why it even matters. You can discover your type as well as what it means for play, fun and connection in your relationship by taking the What's Your Play Personality? quiz. You can do that at playdatesforcouples.com/quiz.

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Now onto the episode and let's talk more about play personalities.

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Last week I talked about the importance of play. We looked at what play is, the benefits of play for couples (and there's lots!) and how to bring play into your relationship in order to create a deeper connection. And as part of weaving play into your relationship, it's important to know your play type or play personality so you can incorporate things that feel fun to you.

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Just like it's important to get to know your personality in general so that you can know yourself and the people in your life better, it's also important to get to know your play personality, specifically. In general, personality is basically your characteristics, traits or qualities that make you uniquely you and determine your behavior.

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And speaking of personalities in general, play types are basically the same kind of idea. In fact, I based the play personalities quiz that I created on the four basic personality types. Now, some systems talk about five types but most refer to four, or at least four umbrella categories that organize multiple types.

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The Myers-Briggs Type Indicator or MBTI is one of the most well-known systems. It's the one where you get the result like ENFJ. Although there are 16 possible personality types, there are four categories that the types fall into and it was based on Carl Yung's four psychological types. Even the 16 personalities site categorizes the 16 possibilities into four categories.

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The four temperament system obviously also has four types and those are sanguine, phlegmatic, choleric and melancholic. The DISC assessment also has four types and there are quite a few different color-based assessments that give you a color as your personality type along with a description. And those also have four types.

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Even in human design, there are four aura types. And there are different perspectives ... there's disagreement about whether there are four types or five, but the originator of human design taught four. And there are all kinds of nuances within the types and way more to human design than just type or even personality, right?

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It's not a personality system but there are still four umbrella types. Regardless of the system, we have all of the types in us but one is dominant and the same is true for play personalities. We also have all the play types in us but we have one that's dominant. It stands out among the rest. And this makes sense because everyone has a different idea of what's fun.

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What's fun is unique to us and something I find fun you might find boring and vice versa. So like I mentioned, I created my play types quiz based on the four basic personality types. Stuart Brown, who wrote a book called Play, created eight types and personally I think they fit into the four basics. The types that I created are:

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Number one: Passionately Playful. So, this one is based on the basic personality type that is like a socializer, sometimes called a promoter. It's like the sanguine personality type in the in the four temperament system. And if you're this type, you're playful by nature. You tend to be excited about life, bubbly or cheerful,

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high energy, expressive, imaginative, fun, light and spontaneous. You're curious about new things and you tend to have lots of new ideas. You're creative, adventurous and passionate and you're people oriented. The number two type is Peacefully Playful and this one is based on the basic personality type that is a supporter, like the phlegmatic personality type.

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And if you're this type, you're calm and steady by nature. You tend to be caring, compassionate, supportive, sensitive, warm, generous and kind. You're all about relationships and connection is important to you. And you may even be a romantic. Harmonious environments matter to you. You're also detail-oriented and you care about the little things, especially for other people.

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The number three type is Powerfully Playful. This one is based on the personality type that's like a controller, sometimes called dominant or a director. Like the choleric personality type in the four temperament system. And if you're this type, you're powerful by nature, you tend to be competitive, strong, determined, motivated, direct, assertive to the point, fast moving and impatient.

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You're adventurous, active and potentially edgy. You're confident and decisive and you're independent. And the fourth type is Purposefully Playful. This one is based on the basic personality type that is an analyzer sometimes called a thinker. It's like the melancholic personality type. And if you're this type, you're a thinker by nature, you tend to be laser-focused, organized, structured, intellectual, factual, introspective, private, deep, rigorous, serious and thorough.

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You like things to be exact, simple, clear and excellent and you can be a perfectionist. You are strategic and you're a critical thinker and you love planning and lists and charts. You may think you're not into play because you think it's silly or stupid or frivolous. Interestingly though, you have your own style.

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You have your own way of play. So, you can find out which type you are by taking the What's Your Play Personality? quiz. When you take the quiz, you'll find out specifically the type that you are but then on the results page, you'll learn a lot more about the type and what it actually means for play in your relationship, including a few ways that you can implement it ... some ideas for certain aspects of your relationship.

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So you can take the quiz at playdatesforcouples.com/quiz and the link will be in the show notes as well. And follow the show so you don't miss any upcoming episodes to help you create an awesome relationship with your partner. There's more about play coming up in the next couple weeks. Thanks for listening and see you in the next one.

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