Show notes

Transformative Healing through Therapy: Unpacking Thoughts, Feelings, and Actions

In today's episode Josh explores the concept of transformative healing in psychotherapy, emphasizing the interconnectedness of thoughts, feelings, and actions in the process. He stresses that deep transformation is possible through the courageous application of truth and receiving God's love, underscoring the principle that our actions are rooted in our thoughts. He also highlights the importance of addressing and changing distorted thinking patterns, feelings, and actions to achieve holistic growth. Included are insights from Gabor Maté on healing and responsibility, as well as reflective questions designed to encourage self reflection and prayer.

00:00 Introduction to Transformation in Therapy

00:20 The Connection Between Thoughts and Actions

01:26 The Influence of Feelings on Thinking

01:57 The Healing Process in Therapy

02:25 The Power of Healing and Responsibility

03:05 Personal Experiences and Case Studies

03:41 Reflective Questions for Personal Growth

04:23 Conclusion: The Next Step of Growth

About Josh Kalsbeek, LMFT

• As a Psychoherapist I help people overcome their greatest struggles.

•Founder and CEO of Great Oaks Collective, and it's flagship program Overcome, a 10-Week virtual Intensive Outpatient Program for Christian couples experiencing sexual betrayal and addiction. www.greatoakscollective.com. 

• Sign up to receive my weekly email newsletter, Words of Wisdom. ​

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Links

Gabor Maté, The Myth of Normal

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Support the podcast

Words of wisdom.

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1 23 On transformation in therapy,

psychotherapy series part two.

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Deep transformation is completely

possible and will be unsurprising

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if you courageously apply truth

as you receive God's love for you.

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How you live is based on how you think.

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Therefore, transformation isn't

fundamentally about your actions.

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Why?

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Your actions are based on what

you think We do, what we believe.

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We can say we believe one thing,

but over time our thinking will be

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revealed by what we actually do.

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Thinking leads to doing,

which leads to results.

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This is part of why in therapy, we spend a

lot of time talking about what you think.

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If you don't get enough upstream,

your distorted thinking will continue

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to impact your actions and you'll

keep getting the same results.

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Yet it is also true that the more you

do what is true, good and beautiful,

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the more your thinking changes.

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This gives you more consistent

actions, improving your results.

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So you must change your

thinking to change your actions.

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And you must change your

actions to change your thinking.

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But this is still too simple.

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Your feelings have a profound

influence on your thinking.

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Here is a general principle about life.

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The less you have identified and

expressed certain painful feelings, the

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more you will be controlled by them.

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Not only that, but you likely

won't even be aware of it, let

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alone that another way is possible.

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Your thinking will strengthen and defend

your wounded way of being, and you

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will dig yourself deeper into the pit.

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While this simple description

doesn't do justice to the healing

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process, it is a way of touching

upon what happens in therapy.

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You'll talk about and change what

you think you will talk about and

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change how you feel, and you will

talk about and change how you act.

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As you make changes in your thinking,

your feelings and your actions, you

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will see progress more holistically.

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Quote.

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And here is where healing comes in.

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We can do nothing about the world

that created our mind, that may have

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instilled in us limiting harmful, untrue

beliefs about ourselves and others.

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However, we can learn to be

responsible for the mind with which

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we create our world moving forward.

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The capacity to heal is born of

the willingness to do just that.

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To take on that responsibility.

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It is about the willingness

to reconsider our entire view.

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If the wounded mind can be

tyrannical, it is a tyrant,

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secretly longing to be deposed.

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I have seen this in my

own life numerous times.

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Experiencing the freedom that

comes with relinquishing some

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unhappy belief or perception.

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My mind has clung to just seconds prior.

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I have also been most fortunate

through my work to encounter case

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after case of astounding turnarounds.

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In every instance, the essential

shift transpired not in people's

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circumstances or histories, but in

how they related to them by Gabor

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Maté in his book, the Myth of Normal

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Questions.

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When is the last time you learned

something new about yourself?

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What is one thing you've changed your mind

about that has turned out to help you?

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What feelings do you need to feel today?

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What small new action can you

practice consistently this week?

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Use these questions as journal prompts and

prayers for this week, and note, commit

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to being a person who continues to grow in

their thinking, their ability to identify,

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feel, and deal with their feelings.

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And a person who takes courageous

action, all you need to do is to decide

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to take the next step of growth today.

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Live wisely.

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Josh.