[00:07] Shannon Spencer: Welcome to another episode of Soul fueled success where we uncover the stories that inspire us to pursue our passions with purpose. Today, I'm excited to introduce Mary Taylor, a former police officer turned lifestyle magazine founder in Kennewick, Washington. Mary's journey from law enforcement to to launching tailored Living magazine is a powerful example of life's unexpected turns and the joy of embracing new chapters. In our conversation, Mary shares the dual sources of her soul fuel, the personal joy she finds in her faith and her family, and the professional fulfillment from innovating and connecting her community. Through her magazine, she opens up about overcoming challenges like dealing with rejection and feeling overlooked, and how these experiences have shaped her approach to business and life. Mary's story is a reminder that soul fuel can be found in every aspect of our lives, from our deepest relationships to our professional endeavors. Whether you're navigating your own career pivot or looking for ways to recharge, this episode is for you. Join us as we dive into a discussion filled with insights on finding and nurturing what truly fuels our souls. Ready to be inspired? Let's get started.

[01:30] Shannon Spencer: Hey, Mary, I'm so glad you're with us.

[01:33] Mary Taylor: Thank you. I am so excited to be here. I hear that I'm like your first.

[01:37] Shannon Spencer: You are absolutely my first guest. And, you know, you're one of the inspirations for me, actually taking the leap and doing the podcast. So who better?

[01:45]Mary Taylor: I love that. Thank you so much.

[01:49] Shannon Spencer: So, for those of you who may not know Mary, I mean, I think that she's world famous, but there might be a few of you who don't know her. Why don't you tell us a little bit about yourself?

[01:59] Well, I'm definitely not world famous, but I do feel like I am a. I'm a part of the community that I live in, so that's important to me. I moved over here in Kennewick, Washington back in 2006. I actually was a police officer, and I fell in love with the tri cities and where I live. And I also. That's also where I fell in love with my husband. And we ended up having two beautiful, healthy baby boys. And I became a full time stay at home mom and absolutely loved that. And then the next chapter of my life was starting up a local lifestyle magazine for the tri cities called Tailored living. And I have been doing that for the last seven years. And, you know, we just kind of go with the flow and enjoy life and, yeah, that's a little bit about me.

[02:56] Yeah.

[02:56] Shannon Spencer: And that's quite a leap from police officer to Lifestyle magazine.

[03:02] Mary Taylor:Hey, you know, you only get one life, so make as many fun chapters as you can.

[03:06] Shannon Spencer: Right, right, exactly. That's one of the things I love about you. And, you know, that role of the police officer and being part of the community is such an important one. So we're all about soul fuel here, and I know that I would love for you to share with us what soul fuel means to you in the context of your business and your life.

[03:27] Well, when we were talking, you and I, we were talking about what soul fuel is. You had mentioned, you know, joy, motivation, positivity, the things that kind of fill your cup. And I love that because it really makes you take a moment to inventory what is it that really makes you tick. And so for me, I. I have two very distinct faces. I've got the business face, and then I've got the personal face, and there's different soul fuels for each.

[04:01] Right, right.

[04:02] So in my personal life, and what fuels me, I would have to say it's my marriage with my husband, my kids and my family. And then my. I recently started going to church, and so I feel like God's a part of that as well. So that has been really what has fueled my personal life. And so I call that my personal soul fuel.

[04:30] Shannon Spencer: Yes, I love that.

[04:32] And for business, it's a little. It's not necessarily like how it is for personal. I love throwing stuff at the wall and seeing what sticks. I love trying new things. I love problem solving. It motivates me. It makes things different. I love the challenge of it. And then I love the rewards that come from it. When you persevere and you figure out, okay, well, this didn't work. This didn't work. And then when you finally do find something that works, like, oh, that fills my cup.

[05:11] Shannon Spencer: So that discovery process is really part of your fuel.

[05:14] I honestly think that the magazine has been the best social experiment for me in terms of being able to connect with other people and allow other people to connect with each other and figure out, like, what is it that draws somebody to want to read a page? What is it that draws somebody to want to say hello to a stranger? And for me, in business, trying to figure out those things, you know, throw it at the wall and see what works, it is so fulfilling.

[05:55] Shannon Spencer: That's awesome. I just love that perspective, right, because so many of us can. Can just get stuck in the same old, same old, but you're somebody who sees something, and then it's like, oh, what would our community look like? Or what do people think about this? And then you just throw it out there and see what sticks.

[06:15] Mary Taylor: And oftentimes, a lot more than not, I fail. There's rejection. There's no's. There's, oops, I shouldn't have done that, you know, or there was a better way to do it. Right. And I try not to let that get me down, but for the times where there's brilliance, it makes all of that worthwhile.

[06:39] Right.

[06:39] Shannon Spencer: So that soul suck. Talk about, you know, we have soul fuel, but then we have the stuff that drains us, which we all have to have in our lives, right? I mean, we have to use up that energy somehow. So when you are feeling that, that soul energy just, you know, sucked right out of you, how do you refill it?

[06:58] Well, for me in particular, there aren't a lot of soul sucks. I don't have a lot of soul sucks, but there are a few things that, like, completely deplete me because I tend to not let a lot of things. I tend to be able to let a lot of things go. But a couple of things that I have a hard time letting go of is feeling dismissed or rejection. Obviously, that's a part of life, and that's hard. But in order to combat that or alleviate that, I really do think that the magazine itself and the production of the magazine and the process of discovery that comes along with the magazine, I think that that is what stops or prevents me from burning out.

[07:51] Oh, right.

[07:52] Mary Taylor: Yeah, yeah.

[07:54] So.

[07:54] Shannon Spencer: And that's what we had talked about before this episode is what was your pet peeve?

[07:59] Right.

[07:59] Shannon Spencer: And so tell us a little bit more about your pet peeve.

[08:04] Mary Taylor: So I'm the youngest of eight brothers and sisters, was invisible, or I tried not to be invisible. So I was loud and obnoxious. But because I was loud and obnoxious, I got ignored quite a bit. And if I had, you know, two cent, if I had an idea, if I said something, very rarely was it actually. I mean, it might have been listened to, but it wasn't heard. And so growing up, I felt like I was dismissed a lot as a child and as an adult, that stuck with me. One of the reasons why I loved going into law enforcement and being a police officer was you see people and you see things that oftentimes get overlooked, people who are dismissed. And as a law enforcement officer, I was able to go in and say, hey, I see you. How are we going to fix this problem? And that gave me a ton of fuel. It made me feel like I was making the community a better place. And, you know, I don't think, like, people talk about superpowers and how they think superpower. Like, if they could have any one superpower in the world, what would it be? I think the absolute worst superpower anybody could ever choose is to be invisible.

[09:21] Hmm.

[09:22] Shannon Spencer: Having been invisible, you could speak to that, right.

[09:25] I just would never, ever want to be able to, like, erase myself.

[09:32] Right.

[09:33] And I also don't like listening to, watching, or seeing others feel erased. And so when I left law enforcement and became a stay at home mom, I kind of lost my community a little bit. I went back into being that invisible Mary. Other than, you know, I wasn't invisible to my family, but to everybody else. I was kind of on a solo journey. And then the next chapter, when I decided I was going to start up the magazine, what was funny is I really realized that the magazine allowed me to see other people, to make those connections with other people, and to help other people do the same. And it was basically combating one of my pet peeves, which is being dismissed because, you know, the magazine, it highlights people and their journeys and their stories so that they are seen and they get a chance to be seen and heard. And so I do love that.

[10:36] Shannon Spencer: Yeah, no, and I love that, too, because you have been able to showcase different parts of our community through the magazine that the majority of us would never even know existed. It's not part of our daily experience. And so being able to tell those stories or showcase, especially the women in business that you showcase, it's not only a great way for people to see what kind of businesses there are, but just the fact that you shine the light on these female entrepreneurs who are doing something that they love and they are serving their community in that way. And that's the thing that gives them soul fuel and that you give them kind of a platform for that in a variety of ways.

[11:20] And it's very unique. Everybody's journey and how they got there or the reasons or circumstances behind it is very unique. And it's an exploratory process for me, too, because I'm constantly learning. And again, it's one of those things where it allows me to expand my horizons and reach out to people who I wouldn't normally feel comfortable reaching out to, because I am kind of an introvert. And the magazine gives me an excuse to say, hey, let me. My name is Mary. What's your name? Let's talk about what you do. I think it's cool. Let's tell your story. And then at the end of it, I made a new friend.

[12:01] Yeah.

[12:01] Shannon Spencer: No, that's awesome. And so in what ways does that kind of energy fuel you through? Maybe the negative things. When people say no or people want.

[12:17] Mary Taylor: To control what you're writing, I think that obviously the nos and the negatives and the sucks always stand out more because that's what you notice. Right. If somebody criticizes you, you receive ten compliments but one complaint. What stands out? The one complaint. Right. Just constantly reminding myself of all of the blessings that I have in my personal life and in my business life, even though there are nothing is perfect and things are bad. Checking in with myself and getting that reality check, like, how bad are things, really? I have a roof over my head. I have food in my belly. My kids are healthy. I am capable, and I have the ability to problem solve. And whatever it is that's getting thrown at me, I don't necessarily know immediately what the answer is going to be, but because of who I am and my creative problem solving skills and stuff, I have been given the gifts to be able to handle it.

[13:16] Right.

[13:16] So for me, you know, I don't let those negatives defeat me or be my story. I refuse to let them be my story.

[13:28] Right.

[13:28] Shannon Spencer: So you're taking. You take control. You take power over the things that you are doing and where you are.

[13:35] Being to a certain point. But there are some times when I can't control it. And then guess what? That's why I started praying.

[13:44] Mm hmm. Mm hmm. I know.

[13:46] Shannon Spencer: It's so good that we have the opportunity and the ability to communicate with our creator so that he can assure us, he can help us be on the right path. And, you know, whether you're Christian or not, I know some of my listeners aren't Christian. It is a gift to be able to have that comfort.

[14:07] Well, listen, I wasn't Christian until I turned 40. I wasn't baptized until last year. Okay? So this is a new experience for me. But up until this point, I had been going the road alone, and I had felt very alone. And then when I realized, wait a minute, I don't have to be alone, everything changed. And again, I guess that's part of how I refuel myself personally. I go to church on Sundays, and guess what? I wasn't the reason why I started going to church on Sundays. It was my son, who is nine years old on his birthday. It was a Sunday, and he was like, can we go to church? Because I want to go to Sunday school with my friends. I'm like, okay, well, I'm not going to say no to that.

[14:57] Shannon Spencer: Right.

[14:58] And then we ended up going, and guess what? After church, I felt rejuvenated. I felt good, so I kept going. And I've been going ever since.

[15:06] Right.

[15:07] I actually miss it. So my son plays hockey and sports, and if we end up having a game, I actually. I miss it. It's something that I want to go back to.

[15:17] Right.

[15:17] Shannon Spencer: That sense of community, that sense of growing together. There's just so many benefits of being around people who are loved by Jesus and who love Jesus.

[15:30]Mary Taylo: I think it also allows me to unplug, because if you're constantly on the grind, if you're constantly doing things and you don't have a chance to disconnect. Yes. Connection is super, super important. But if you're always connected and on high, the rate of burnout obviously, is going to be. It's faster.

[15:52] Shannon Spencer: Right.

[15:52] Mary Taylor: So for me, going to church allows me to turn my brain off and just feel. And I think that that has been rejuvenating for me. Same with when I go home and I'm with my kids and we're doing something, like I'm gardening or we're doing something, it allows me to turn off the outside noise and just be in the moment. And then guess what? When I return, I feel refreshed.

[16:22] Right.

[16:22] Shannon Spencer: So for our listeners who maybe are like you and are trailblazers and high achievers and just really driven to serve a need in their community, but maybe they just haven't really taken the time for themselves and they don't really know what to do to fill their cup. What are some suggestions you have? What are things that you do that just really, like? You mentioned gardening. What else is there that you just really love to do that makes you feel good and takes away the stress of.

[16:54] Yeah. So anything that involves grounding or getting my hands in the dirt or the soil, I love weeding.

[17:04] Shannon Spencer: No, you should come to my house. I got some weeds for you.

[17:07] Mary Taylor: Let me tell you, that is satisfying. After you weed a part of your garden and then you look and you realize all the room that you let for your beautiful flowers to come up and grow, you know, the space that you've made, I think that you're making space for your. Yourself internally, you know, too. So metaphorically speaking, you know, I think that it's. It's good for the soul. Bath. I take baths all of the time. My boys make fun of me because of how long my baths last. They can. They can always tell how my week has been by how cold the water is, by the time I get out of it or how pruny my fingers are. But yeah, you know, that rejuvenates me. And, you know, sometimes maybe it'll just be making myself a cup of tea or the little luxuries like that that I, you know, I'll go to the coffee drive thru and I'll get myself a coffee or I'll just take a drive or I'll take a walk. For me, usually it's something involved with outdoors. So bath. Yes, it's inside, but it's water. And water is an element. And I feel like it's calming and soothing to the soul. The sunlight, if the sun is out and it is 20 degrees outside, you will find me laying on the ground like a cat in a sun ray, soaking up the sun because again, it helps me unplug.

[18:38] Right.

[18:38] Shannon Spencer: I love that. And I'm somebody who, as an extrovert, I'm somebody who gravitates towards people and doing things with people. So I love those examples of things that you're doing solo, that you can just be in your own skin and your own body, just fueling it with the things that you need and then also being able to pray during that time or meditate during that time and.

[19:03] Mary Taylor: Just, well, I am not an extrovert. And the idea of going in front of a bunch of people, it brings me anxiety. Now, it doesn't mean that I don't do it because I know that it is important for business and I know that it's important for growth. And, you know, you can't always be comfortable.

[19:19] Right.

[19:20] You know, because comfortability breeds complacency.

[19:24] Mary Taylor: Complacency, exactly.

[19:26] Right. That's a mouthful.

[19:27] Right.

[19:27] Mary Taylor: That is a mouthful.

[19:28] So, you know, I do like switching it up and I do like challenging myself. Like, I'm going to be going to a breakfast, breakfast here in a couple of weeks that, you know, I am mentally preparing myself for. And I also know after it, I'm going to need to have some merry downtime.

[19:44] Right.

[19:44] Mary Taylor: For sure. And I love that you're aware of that because that's part of. Of the importance of soul fuel, is being able to recognize how you're wired, how you need to be able to receive the things that you need in.

[20:00] Order to be uniquely you. And it took me 40 years to get there because I constantly compromised. Oh, but it's just this one thing. Oh, it's just this one thing. And then it turns into two things and three things and all of a sudden I've lost myself and then I have a major breakdown. Or a major meltdown. And then I have to start from scratch. And you can only do that so many times. It's not a bad thing because it allows you to get to know yourself better.

[20:26] Right, right.

[20:27] I just was really stubborn, and it took me 40 years to figure that out.

[20:31] Mary Taylor: I always think that I'm a. I mean, I know I'm a stubborn person, too,