You love the Word. You're at church every week. Still, there are a lot of messages to sort through... and many seem to make sense. If you need a little clarity to stay the course in your Christian parenting when the culture is making it hard to discern truth, we hope this interview brings clarity and peace. Biblical motherhood may not be easy, but it promises blessings if we look to Him above all else. Let's raise children who find Jesus as their first love, not just children who know all the Bible stories.

Scriptures Referenced:

Psalm 16:11

Proverbs 15:1

2 Timothy 4:3

Romans 7

Psalm 100:4

Acts 17:11

They're the joyful agains our children shout on the swings, the

2

exhausting agains of cooking and laundry,

and the difficult agains of discipline.

3

So much of what we do

as mothers is on repeat.

4

So what if we woke up with clarity,

knowing which agains we were called

5

to, and went to bed believing we

are faithful in what matters most?

6

We believe God's Word is

the key to untangle from the

7

confusion and overwhelm we feel.

8

Let's look up together to embrace a

motherhood full of freedom and joy.

9

Welcome to the again,

podcast I'm Stephanie Hickox.

10

And this is brought to you

by entrusted ministries.

11

We're here to help you untangle

biblical motherhood . We want you to

12

live motherhood with freedom and joy.

13

And not feel like it

has to be so difficult.

14

we hope that this series is helping

you clarify what God's word is

15

calling you to, and that it's speaking

louder than the culture around you.

16

There are so many mixed messages.

17

And confusing.

18

And often convincing.

19

Theories.

20

But we want you to know

that you're not alone.

21

And encourage you to stay the course.

22

Believing in the promises of God's word.

23

Remaining faithful.

24

And the calling that he set before you.

25

We're going to get a little bit

more controversial in this episode.

26

I'm going to ask Sylvia some

more difficult questions.

27

And we're going to come back to

these and future episodes because

28

we want to make sure that we're

laying a biblical framework for

29

the opinions we lay before you.

30

We are grateful for Sylvia's continued

a fire and her devotion to scripture.

31

We pray.

32

She lights a fire in you for.

33

The word of God.

34

If you've been enjoying the again

podcast, and he believed that

35

it's helping you set your eyes.

36

Above and not at the world

around you and your parenting.

37

Would you consider leaving a review?

38

This really helps others.

39

Who are seeking wisdom on

biblical parenting to find us.

40

And we would be so grateful if

you would help spread the word.

41

So please write a review and

share this episode with a friend.

42

That needs to be encouraged

that she's on the right track.

43

Thanks for your help.

44

Stephanie: Okay, Sylvia, you've been

knocking it out of the park so far.

45

And I'm going to have to give

you some harder questions now.

46

This is a question that I've

pondered for a couple of

47

years and I just love to hear.

48

Other people's answers.

49

If you could give.

50

A job description for biblical motherhood.

51

How would you define it?

52

Sylvia: well, First I would say it's Psalm

53

Biblical motherhood starts with

us enjoying and delighting in God.

54

It starts with us living

fully surrendered to Him.

55

Biblical motherhood is saying, I can

do nothing else than parent my children

56

on the authority of the Bible because

it's so radically changed and formed

57

me that I have nothing else to offer

them of I'll gladly obey what God tells

58

me to do because I've seen the word

of God too powerfully in my own life.

59

So Psalm 16:11 is the starting place.

60

But I think biblical motherhood

is living authentically.

61

Beautifully committed and surrendered to

God before your children because that will

62

impact the Word of God in teaching it.

63

I can't fathom teaching my children

something that doesn't stem from the Bible

64

because I have no wisdom apart from God.

65

God is a wisdom.

66

He's all wise.

67

So not only will I teach it that way,

but I will also verbally say that

68

biblical motherhood is giving glory

to God Non stop, because we don't know

69

how to give glory to anything else.

70

So it's got to start with that full

surrender of desiring God, obeying him,

71

finding terrific joy in that, and then

proclaiming his excellencies, right?

72

Like 1 Peter tells us, proclaim the

excellencies of him who called you out

73

of darkness and into his glorious light.

74

And you're like how does that relate

to potty training a two year old?

75

Listen, everything in the Bible

relates to all ages and stages of

76

our children, because listen, as

we're training them, sometimes I'm

77

the one that needs that reminder.

78

Sylvia, proclaim the excellencies

of him that your child is a gift.

79

Every good gift is from God,

and he's trusted you with these

80

children, so go magnify his name.

81

You have greater purpose in this potty

training moment than getting children

82

to understand the use of toilet paper.

83

Your purpose is, I train you so that you

can become the most amazing person to

84

serve the Lord, your God, with all of

your heart, soul, mind, and strength.

85

That's my end goal.

86

That's biblical motherhood.

87

It's also then being so engrossed in his

word that it naturally comes out of you.

88

I think so often in this quest and

zeal that we talked about earlier

89

with what I see as one of the greatest

joys in young moms is this quest and

90

zeal to raise children on the Bible.

91

We have to understand that.

92

In the natural, everyday, mundane, casual

moments of life, the natural overflow

93

of it is often more taught and caught

than the, let's all sit down and we're

94

going to read this passage of scripture.

95

Because children are antsy and

they're squiggly and they're

96

wiggly and that's basically it.

97

Beautiful.

98

And that's how God's designed them.

99

But what if we did hopscotch outside

while we recited a Bible verse?

100

Or what if we, created a song

with our, tambourine and all other

101

children's musical instruments that

are delightfully loud and zany.

102

But what if we made a song

for the Lord during that?

103

So I think it's getting creative to exalt

God in all things, because once children,

104

Taste and see that the Lord is good.

105

They don't have an

appetite for anything else.

106

It's just putting him before all things,

putting him in front of all things,

107

proclaiming his excellency, allowing

them into your journey with the Lord and

108

his beauty in being faithful, his beauty

in being forgiving, his beauty in being

109

steadfast versus our heart that is not.

110

And drawing them to Him

relentlessly and passionately.

111

And I will say with Biblical

motherhood, sorry, if you could give

112

a definition, why sure, I'd love

to give you eight minutes of one,

113

Stephanie: I'm soaking it all in.

114

I love it.

115

Sylvia: I think the other thing

with that is Biblical moms.

116

Know that the end is

victory in Jesus Christ.

117

We know this life is a mist.

118

We know that the difficulties are coming.

119

We know that God is faithful.

120

We know that we don't have it

in ourselves and we rely on Him.

121

And that's what sustains us.

122

Will we get tired sometimes?

123

We will.

124

But biblical moms say, I either do or

don't believe that God is all powerful.

125

And I do.

126

I can walk in His power.

127

The same power that raised

Christ from the dead is in me by

128

His power and by His strength.

129

And so it's turning to Him for

that rather than turning to myself.

130

It's turning to Him rather

than going to Google.

131

It's turning to Him rather than.

132

Spinning on thoughts that just aren't

helpful and instead taking those

133

thoughts captive and putting them

against the truth of God's word.

134

So biblical motherhood, it's ongoing.

135

There is no off day and

praise God there's not.

136

We don't want to walk

away from this calling.

137

It's a high calling.

138

It's a privilege and it's

one that requires tenacity,

139

but it's a joyful tenacity.

140

Doing hard things always brings great joy.

141

Stephanie: Amen.

142

Oh, I absolutely agree

that when our kids see us.

143

Entering his courts with Thanksgiving

and his gates with praise that that

144

is completely contagious and it

becomes so natural for them when

145

we've built that habit, that we have

the eyes to see the goodness of God.

146

All around us and then they.

147

Follow suit in that it is so exciting

to see and then I think we're so

148

blessed by that pursuit of holiness too.

149

As they're pointing our kids

to him, we're being refined.

150

And I noticed in my own life, wow.

151

I have never been more faithful.

152

Then when I have had to feed little

ones all day, every day, when I've had

153

to Nurse them or pick up after them.

154

It's amazing how my

character has been refined.

155

As I'm being faithful to my children.

156

Sylvia: And it's a

parenting that's so free.

157

I think that's the gift that we give

our children as biblical moms is they

158

know at the end of the day, not when

they're two, not when they're three,

159

Stephanie: Yeah.

160

Sylvia: that's when we're just,

we're staying steadfast, putting

161

our nose to the grindstone and doing

what the Bible calls us to, like

162

they're going to learn to obey.

163

We're just going to start there.

164

But obedience we know brings blessing and

obedience brings freedom and as they begin

165

to experience some of the freedom that

comes from a full surrender to him and to

166

his word and to his ways, like they begin

to understand why mom and dad are free.

167

And so that's why with Entrusted's

curriculum that I think is so

168

important is it starts with God.

169

It starts with the Bible, it starts

with our personal walk with Him.

170

Because if we aren't walking in the

freedom of confessed sin, if we aren't

171

walking in the freedom of a mind saturated

with Scripture, if we aren't walking

172

in the freedom of right relationships

with every single person we are

173

encountering, because we know that it's

false worship to have a bad relationship

174

with someone and b e seeking God.

175

Like we're to handle that.

176

We're to solve it.

177

We're to seek peace.

178

And as far as it depends on

us, be at peace with everyone.

179

That's the freedom that

our kids will begin to see.

180

And as they continue to get

older, they're going to taste

181

little bits of that freedom.

182

They too desire a life free from the

anxieties and the cares of the world,

183

the frets of the world, the heaviness of

the world, the depravity of the world,

184

and pray for spiritual eyes for your

children to see that more and more with

185

every passing day, because that speaks

the volumes as to why would I want to

186

continue on in the faith of my parents?

187

Why wouldn't I?

188

It's freedom.

189

It's joy.

190

It's strength.

191

It's victory.

192

It's hard times with stability and peace.

193

It's knowing you have a shelter

to run to in the time of storm

194

and resting confidently in

the security of that shelter.

195

That's an abundant life, now and forever,

that's too contagious for them to say,

196

Yeah, I think I'll pass on that as I age.

197

We can't ask them to follow on and a

faith that we ourselves are not modeling.

198

That's so true.

199

We can't just teach them Bible passages.

200

And expect that they have.

201

Found their first love and Jesus Christ.

202

We absolutely need to model

that for our children.

203

Sylvia.

204

May I ask you what your thoughts

are when you think about the

205

gentle parenting movement?

206

It's becoming increasingly

prevalent in culture, but

207

even within the church stores.

208

So what do you think that

scripture has to say?

209

About gentle parenting.

210

Sylvia: I think, again, we go,

first and foremost, back to the

211

authority of the Word of God.

212

Method never trumps God's Word.

213

Whatever you read from people, whatever

trend is coming up in parenting,

214

this is nothing new under the sun.

215

The book of Ecclesiastes has told

us nothing's new under the sun.

216

And here we go.

217

Here's another wave of what

Colossians talks about human wisdom.

218

First of all, it does not set

you up as a parent to be the

219

authority over your child.

220

The bigger problem in that is that's

a misunderstanding of authority.

221

When gentle parenting, oh, you don't

want to be this authoritative figure.

222

Then we've misunderstood that

authority was designed by God for good.

223

If we've read the book of Judges,

we know, my word, authority matters.

224

We on our own will seek sinful ways.

225

Why?

226

Because our heart is

deceitful above all things.

227

Our children's hearts are

deceitful above all things.

228

All of us, every single human being

walking on the planet has been born with

229

a sin nature that seeks sinful things.

230

It's deceitful above all things.

231

That's the problem.

232

The good news is we have the

solution in Jesus Christ who can

233

transform our hearts and minds.

234

That being said, if we don't

understand the beauty of authority.

235

We won't sit under the

authority of God's Word.

236

As wives, we won't sit under

the authority of our husbands.

237

As church members, we won't sit

under the authority of our church.

238

Authority is a good thing.

239

So first of all, we have to look at

that when basically gentle parenting

240

saying, let your child do this.

241

You don't want to say

anything too harshly.

242

You don't want to of course

we wouldn't speak harshly.

243

The Bible says, A harsh word stirs up

anger, but a soft answer turns away wrath.

244

So we already would resign

ourselves to that because we're

245

biblical women and we're women

that want to parent on the Bible.

246

Of course, we're not

going to speak harshly.

247

That being said, if we think that

we can't speak to truth, then

248

we have aligned ourselves with

a worldview that's unbiblical.

249

We must train a biblical worldview

in our children that includes we have

250

standards and they aren't set up by us.

251

They are set up by God

who is our authority.

252

So if we don't teach our children

from a very young age that

253

they are under authority and

that authority is a beautiful.

254

Good thing we have set them up

to fail, because they will have

255

authority everywhere in their lives.

256

And can you imagine their poor boss

someday, if they haven't learned to

257

understand that authority is a good thing,

they might not have that job for too long.

258

How's it going to go in school

with a teacher if they can't submit

259

to the authority of someone else?

260

Anyone, man, woman, we are to submit

to God, we're to submit to authorities.

261

Submission in the Bible is

not a call to be shackled.

262

It's a call to freedom, order, and peace.

263

And gentle parenting, the biggest

problem I see with it is that

264

bucking of establishing yourself as

a position of authority for fear that

265

your children won't listen to you.

266

There again, as biblical

people, we don't walk in fear.

267

Fear has no place in a believer's

life because we are confident, because

268

we are standing on the inerrant,

perfect, sufficient Word of God.

269

So the authority issue with gentle

pairing is absolutely wrong.

270

The fear factor behind it, I

can't parent wondering what

271

my child's response will be.

272

We just talked about that.

273

I parent because I want to

glorify God and obey him.

274

These are his kids that he has entrusted

to me for 18 years under my home.

275

And then after that, however long the

Lord tarries or lets them have life,

276

but it's for him, it's all for him.

277

And so gentle parenting puts so

much power in the hands of children

278

and so much power in their feelings.

279

So that's the third part of it.

280

So first of all, it's the authority issue.

281

Second of all, it's that

we're parenting and fear.

282

And the third is we're parenting,

putting feelings ahead of truth.

283

And that's a huge problem

in our culture right now.

284

We have to train our children not to let

feelings be the engine of their life.

285

It's gotta be the caboose.

286

We put The truth first

and our feelings follow.

287

But right now our culture has completely

turned that upside down where, oh my

288

goodness, their feelings are everything.

289

Listen, feelings are real,

but they're not reliable.

290

Feelings also have to be

submitted to the word of God.

291

And what a joyful thing as

parents that we get to teach our

292

children how to take our feelings.

293

And take scripture to those feelings

and allow scripture to do what it does

294

best, which is transform our mind and our

heart so that we can walk out in truth.

295

So not all feelings are bad, we

never want to categorically

296

call feelings bad or good.

297

They are feelings.

298

That's what they are.

299

What we need to do then with our

feelings is acknowledge they are real.

300

But they're not reliable.

301

everything else that comes into

our lives, we're going to say,

302

what does the Bible say about that?

303

So if my feeling is fear, I'm going

to take some Bible verses, when

304

I'm afraid I can trust in you.

305

If I trust in God's word, that means

there's authority in my life and

306

gentle parenting goes out the window.

307

That being said.

308

We do want to go back to that proverb

that says that a harsh word stirs up

309

anger and a soft answer turns away wrath.

310

Because we are biblical parents,

and because we are under the

311

strength of the powerful Holy

Spirit of God, our conduct and our

312

character needs to be of gentleness.

313

That's a biblical quality.

314

But where we have to be

looking is holistically to

315

what this movement entails.

316

It's not just being a gentle person.

317

If that were the case, good news.

318

We're already there with the Word of God,

but this is also bringing in other things.

319

And so can I add one more

thing about gentle parenting?

320

False Teachers are everywhere.

321

We're warned about them

all over in the Bible.

322

And moms, if you aren't in the Word of

God daily, soaking on it, marinating on

323

it, memorizing it, thinking on it, you

will fall prey to things like gentle

324

parenting that are just a degree off

of the truth of the word of God at

325

first glance, but you have to look at

everything and how that plays out in a

326

trajectory because one degree off of truth

over time turns into 10 degrees, turns

327

into 15 degrees, turns into 20 degrees.

328

We cannot allow our minds

to entertain something just

329

because it tickles our ears.

330

The Bible says if it's tickling

our ears, it's a false word.

331

And we need to be so cautious about that.

332

Gentle parenting.

333

You know why it sounds great?

334

Because it appeals to

all of our insecurities.

335

Can I really take a stance of authority?

336

Maybe my children are

going to hate me for it.

337

Oh, I ought to parent in fear because

what if this means then they aren't

338

going to walk with the Lord and they

aren't going to, follow His ways and

339

then they're never learn how to do this

and they're going to hate me and I'm not

340

going to look cool in front of all the

other soccer moms and, all these things.

341

They're appealing to the flesh.

342

And if something is appealing to

my flesh, rather than aligning with

343

the Word of God, I have to take that

necessary step to cut it out of my life.

344

Listen, we're too quick to read

another book when We have the Bible.

345

Why would you come to me and say, I

don't have time to be in the Bible

346

and then say, I'm wondering if you

can tell me about gentle parenting,

347

because I just read this book.

348

No.

349

Start with the Word of God.

350

If you don't have time for the

Word of God, you don't have time

351

for any other book, any other

podcast, any other blog, anything.

352

Any other, anything you get in

the Bible and things like gentle

353

parenting will be very obvious about

where they are off from the truth.

354

The problem is that if we're honest with

ourselves, again, things that appeal to

355

our flesh, this is Romans seven lived out.

356

It is more appealing at first.

357

It is in our sinful nature, in our

sinful hearts, we will go towards what

358

is easy, what tickles our ears, what's

appealing, what makes me feel like I'm

359

winning as a mom, what makes my days

easier so I can go get a pedicure.

360

That's not biblical.

361

We're called to high calling that.

362

It is hard and it is

intense, but you know what?

363

My end goal isn't a child that

thinks they're awesome and thinks

364

they're great and lives their best

life because that best life is a

365

fallacy and I have lied to my child.

366

My goal is to raise a child

that knows that without

367

question, Jesus Christ is Lord.

368

And that means every word, every action,

every thought, every attitude has to

369

be taken captive to the Word of God.

370

Sorry.

371

Stephanie: Please, I am just loving this.

372

The fruit of you spending time at

the feet of Jesus is so contagious.

373

I absolutely love

everything you're saying.

374

You're putting words to things that

I so agree with and just saying,

375

communicating them so incredibly.

376

I've loved every second of this.

377

You are a rare treasure and I praise God

that He has given you a place to speak to

378

so many women, to encourage them in the

good and right way, to make no provision

379

for the flesh, to know that God is good

and caring and He hears any sees, but that

380

His glory is so much more important than.

381

Our experience and to view Him more

accurately and not through, what

382

we're feeling and experiencing and

to teach our children to do the same.

383

I just praise God for your influence,

this opportunity, and the moms that

384

are going to hear this, the moms

that you minister to, what your

385

children are going to do after a

life of living with a mother pointing

386

them faithfully to the Word of God.

387

You're good soil, Sylvia.

388

Sylvia: Oh, you're very

well, it's him, right?

389

He's the one that took this wretch

of a sinner and said, you know what?

390

You know what?

391

There's nothing good in

you, but I am all good.

392

And His irresistible grace drew me

in, and He just keeps changing me.

393

But that's all of us.

394

That's all of our stories and can

be even more so ongoingly all of our

395

stories where we daily die to self,

daily confess our sins, daily seek Him.

396

Daily live in a place of

repentance with eyes fixed on

397

Him and hearts ready to obey.

398

That's what He does.

399

He's the master.

400

He does that so beautifully.

401

Stephanie: Yes.

402

And He provides the

opportunities for us to seek Him.

403

Have you found that in the moments

of motherhood, even in the busiest

404

seasons, where you're like, Lord,

please help me to order my days

405

so I can gain a heart of wisdom.

406

I've been meditating

on that verse as well.

407

That He just makes it happen.

408

I think that moms do need to be

honest about where our priorities are.

409

And we think that maybe a little

bit of numbing and a little bit

410

of scrolling is just what we need.

411

But really digging in and meditating on

the word of God that gives us the strength

412

to persevere actually is life giving.

413

It's joy giving.

414

that's what we need over 10

reels or a quick laugh it's

415

the joy of the Lord becoming our

416

Sylvia: strength.

417

It is.

418

And doing it with our children I think in

some of those hardest moments where I felt

419

just weary and exhausted and underslept

and overworked, and we've all been there.

420

Every single mama.

421

We've all fought.

422

As we sit crisscross applesauce at 10 a.

423

m.

424

surrounded by Little Tykes, things in

red, yellow, and green plastic everywhere,

425

we've all thought, I don't have it.

426

I don't have it.

427

And that's where we

start, because we don't.

428

But we don't live in our strength.

429

We live in the strength of the Lord.

430

And so it's taking that next right step

of obedience to say, that's not right

431

thinking, Lord, would you forgive me for

wanting to take a moment of self pity.

432

Would you forgive me for getting my

eyes on me instead of my eyes on you?

433

Would you give me one creative idea

with these sweet kids today so that

434

I can parent them for your glory?

435

Would you give me great joy in it?

436

Oftentimes in moments like that, we would

turn on a worship song and sing together

437

and dance to it or create a new song.

438

He has given us music as such a

beautiful gift and kids love it.

439

So in those moments when we're at

our weakest and we're just feeling

440

like we don't have anything left

anymore, I can't encourage you enough.

441

He puts a new song in our heart.

442

There's so many wonderful songs out

there that are Bible based, where

443

you are not only fueling your own

heart and soul, but you're fueling

444

the heart and soul of your children.

445

And just that little bit of change in

motion can often change emotion and

446

really help us to realign our hearts

and minds back on Him and His Word.

447

And so He's worth it.

448

He's worth us forsaking that fleshly Focus

that actually leads to despair, but we've

449

seen it too much in the Psalms, right?

450

When we're struggling, when we're

having a hard time, we can be

451

real to that struggle for sure.

452

But just like in all of the laments

in the Psalms, all that, there's

453

only like a couple that don't get

to the but then I considered my

454

ways and went into the sanctuary of

God, but God being rich in mercy.

455

These powerful, phrases in the Bible

like that show transforming of the

456

mind and that's imperative that we go

hard after that too, that we have those

457

moments where we can say, God, I am,

I'm weak, I'm weary, I'm exhausted.

458

I don't have anything.

459

Fine.

460

Acknowledge that, be real with

that, but get to the but You are

461

all powerful, You are merciful.

462

You tell me that if I lack wisdom

to ask it, You tell me my children

463

are a blessing from the Lord and I

am to steward them for your glory.

464

So Lord, empower me today.

465

Give me joy.

466

I'm going to walk out in that joy now.

467

I'm going to pray until

I'm actually praying.

468

Praying, right?

469

I'm going to just start doing the right

thing, whether my feelings feel it or

470

not, trusting You to bring me great

delight in that duty that I am doing to

471

follow hard after You and obey Your word.

472

And He does what He says He will do.

473

He transforms us.

474

It's beautiful.

475

Stephanie: Perhaps you've

been the same to this series.

476

Any of that?

477

Ouch.

478

I'm not quite sure.

479

I agree with that.

480

I don't know that my

convictions line up the same.

481

I'm not actually sure.

482

What I think the word of God says.

483

We would encourage you to be

like the Bereans that scripture

484

says they dug into the word and

they found out for themselves.

485

We are going to continue to speak

about some of these hard topics.

486

And we want you to keep coming back.

487

But more than anything.

488

We want you in his word sorting out.

489

What you believe that the Lord is saying.

490

He is a faithful God.

491

And his word as living an active.

492

And we trust that it will be for you.

493

Keep coming back.

494

We're going to search it out with you.

495

We know you're busy, Mama, so

we are truly grateful you joined

496

us for this episode of Again.

497

If you're looking for more information

about building your home on the

498

foundation of Jesus Christ, head to www.

499

EntrustedMinistries.

500

com to learn more about our study for

moms, Entrusted with a Child's Heart.

501

This scripture saturated study

has blessed families around the

502

world, and we want it for you, too.

503

Before you go, I want to pray

this benediction over you

504

from 2 Thessalonians 1, 11 12.

505

We're rooting for you.

506

To this end, we always pray for you,

that our God may make you worthy of His

507

calling, and may fulfill every resolve

for good and every work of faith by

508

His power, so that the name of our Lord

Jesus may be glorified in you, and you in

509

Him, according to the grace of our God.

510

And the Lord Jesus Christ.

511

Amen.

512

Until we meet again.