After a hiatus filled with international exploration and life-changing decisions, Octavia returns to share why she disappeared—and what happened when she spent 60 days living in Portugal as a 54-year-old cancer survivor testing what international life could look like.

Recording from the Algarve region, she opens up about her 8-year dream of exploring life abroad, how a stage 3 colorectal cancer diagnosis delayed everything, and the physical transformation that happened when she finally spent two months living like a local in Portugal.

This episode is raw, honest, and deeply personal about what happens when you survive something that forces you to ask: "If I get through this, what do I actually want my life to look like?"—and then having the courage to explore that answer.

EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS:

- The backstory: Why Portugal has been calling for 8 years and what finally made it possible

- Physical transformation: How 30 days reduced inflammation, improved LARS syndrome symptoms, and reset her nervous system

- The Puerto Vallarta chapter: Why she fell in love with Mexico too, and how astrocartography explained being pulled to two different places

- "Safe and free" decoded: What those words mean practically for Black women living outside the U.S.

- The visa reality: Digital Nomad Visa process and what's actually involved

- Culture Lit's evolution: How the podcast is expanding to include wellness, entrepreneurship, and international living while still centering Black romance

BOOKS MENTIONED:

Can't Get Enough - Kennedy Ryan

Plus Size Player - Danielle Allen

Quasim Series - Jahquel J

Tender Offer - Tanvier Peart

Works by Regina Black, Tati Richardson, Mea Monique

RESOURCES:

🗺️ Astrocartography: astro-seek.com

Find this and other recommendations at The CultureLit online BookShop and support independent bookstores at Visit my bookshop!

Culture Lit is a community celebrating black women and black love, and a reminder that black women deserve joy, love success, second chances, and all the beautiful magic the world has to offer.

Please follow the podcast via RSS, Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Pocket Casts or wherever you listen to your podcasts!

Let me know what you’re reading, what you’re thinking, and what you’re thinking about what you’re reading.

If this episode resonated:

✨ Leave a 5-star review

✨ Share with someone considering a big life change

✨ Tag @becomingoctavia with your takeaways

Culture Lit celebrates Black romance novels, Black women's wellness, and the courage to write your own story—on the page and in real life.

STAY CONNECTED

Instagram: becomingoctavia

Twitter: xooctaviamarie

FB: BecomingOctaviaMarie

Music credit: Cool Jazz Beat by FASOL PROD

A Subito Media production

Mentioned in this episode:

If you're enjoying the show, join our community at culturelitpodcast.com.

Visit my bookshop!

Hey, beautiful and welcome back to Culture

Lit, the podcast where black women's

2

love stories, wellness journeys, and

cultural brilliance take center stage.

3

I'm your host, Octavia Marie, and

if you've been wondering where I've

4

been, well, I have a story to tell

you, actually, I have several stories

5

to tell you and today's episode.

6

It's different.

7

It's personal, it's vulnerable,

and honestly, it's one I've been

8

both excited and nervous to share.

9

Because this isn't just about books

today, though, trust me, the books are

10

still very much part of this journey.

11

This is about something I've been

living, breathing, and exploring

12

over the past several months.

13

Something that's been quietly

shifting the way I see my life.

14

My future and what it means to

truly romanticize your own story.

15

So grab your favorite tea, get

comfortable, and let me take

16

you on this journey with me.

17

If you've been a longtime listener of

Culture Lit, you know, I've recorded 27

18

episodes before the 1 27 conversations

about Black romance novels, about

19

joy, about representation, about

the authors who are creating these

20

beautiful worlds for us, and then.

21

I went quiet, not because I stopped

loving these stories, not because I

22

stopped believing in this work, but

because life invited me to live a

23

different chapter for a while, a chapter

that required me to step away from the

24

microphone and step into something I'd

been dreaming about for nearly a decade.

25

Let me back.

26

Eight years ago, in 2017, I visited

Portugal for the first time, and

27

from the moment I stepped off that

plane, something inside me shifted.

28

I can't fully explain it.

29

It wasn't just the cobblestone streets

or the pastel dta or the ocean breeze.

30

It was something deeper, a

feeling of rightness that I

31

hadn't felt in a very long time.

32

I remember walking through the winding

streets of Lisbon, looking up at the

33

Azule hotels that decorated the buildings,

feeling the warmth of the sun on my

34

skin and thinking I could live here.

35

I want to explore what it

would be like to live here.

36

And from that moment on, I said

it out loud to friends, to family,

37

to anyone who would listen.

38

I'm going to spend real time in Portugal.

39

But you know how life works, right?

40

You make plans and then

life has other plans.

41

Before I could visit Portugal again,

COVID-19 hit the world, came to a halt.

42

Borders closed.

43

Dreams were put on pause, and I waited.

44

Then just as the world started

opening back up, just as I started

45

planning my return trip in 2022, I

received news that changed everything.

46

Stage three, colorectal cancer.

47

I've shared bits and pieces of

my cancer journey on this podcast

48

before, but I haven't fully unpacked

what those three years looked like.

49

The surgery, the chemotherapy,

the endless appointments.

50

The exhaustion that settles into

your bones, the fear that lives in

51

the back of your mind, even when

you're trying to stay positive.

52

But more than that, the way it

forced me to confront what I

53

was actually living for, because

here's the thing about cancer.

54

It strips away all the noise, all the

shoulds and the societal expectations.

55

And the timelines you thought

you were supposed to follow.

56

It asks you one very simple, very brutal

question, if you survive this, what do

57

you actually want your life to look like?

58

And for me, the answer kept

coming back to Portugal.

59

So this summer, after three years of

treatment, healing and rebuilding my body

60

and my life, I finally got on that plane,

not for a vacation, not for a quick visit,

61

but for two full months to test what

living there might actually feel like.

62

I needed to know if what I

felt eight years ago was real.

63

If it was just the excitement of

travel, the novelty of a new place,

64

or if there was truly something about

Portugal that called to my soul.

65

And as I'm recording this from Portugal

right now on October 2nd, having

66

spent nearly two months here, I can

tell you it wasn't just excitement.

67

There's something real here,

something worth exploring further.

68

Let me paint you a picture of what my life

has looked like for the past two months.

69

I'm staying in Lule, a beautiful

town in the Algarve region.

70

My accommodation sits atop a hilltop,

and when I wake up in the mornings,

71

I can see the ocean on the far

skyline, about 30 minutes away.

72

In ra, I watch the sunrise most

mornings while doing guided meditations.

73

Then I make myself an herbal tea,

sometimes matcha, and a light breakfast.

74

And here's where it gets good.

75

I have access to this incredible

living space with floor to ceiling,

76

glass, windows, and doors all around.

77

When I open them, the indoors

and outdoors become one.

78

There's a pool where I do my

morning Pilates or yoga stretches.

79

The air is fresh.

80

The light is soft.

81

Everything feels slower,

and that slowness.

82

That's what I've been craving my entire

adult life without even knowing it.

83

After my morning routine, I'd either work

on podcast ideas, PR strategies for my

84

business, or I'd head out on an adventure.

85

I've wandered through Lagos, Lagoa

Porches, Comporta sills, Vera.

86

I even hopped over to Spain

to explore Seville and Aya.

87

I visited Res.

88

Which is supposedly the end of the

world, the most southern point of Europe.

89

Standing there looking out at

the Atlantic, I felt something I

90

can only describe as expansive.

91

Most days I ate breakfast

and lunch at home.

92

My goal for these two months

was simple, live like a local.

93

Not like a tourist rushing from one

Instagram worthy spot to another, but

94

like someone who's testing what it would

actually be like to live here in the

95

late afternoons, usually between three

and 7:00 PM when most restaurants closed

96

for Siesta, I'd strategize and work.

97

Then in the evenings, I'd

pick a spot for dinner.

98

Sometimes a small family owned restaurant,

sometimes a cafe overlooking the

99

ocean, and I'd sit there alone with a

romance book and my thoughts and just.

100

Be.

101

Do you know how radical that is for

a black woman to just be, to not

102

be performing, to not be proving,

to not be managing everyone else's

103

comfort or expectations to just

exist in a space where you feel

104

safe, free, and fully yourself?

105

And that brings me to something I need to

unpack what safe and free actually means.

106

When I say I felt safe and free in

Portugal, I'm not just talking about

107

walking alone at night, though, yes,

I did that and it felt liberating.

108

I'm talking about freedom from the

racial microaggressions that are so

109

constant in the US that you don't even

realize how much energy you're spending

110

navigating them until they're gone.

111

I'm talking about freedom

from the relentless grind

112

culture that tells black women.

113

We have to work twice as hard, be twice

as perfect and never, ever slow down.

114

I'm talking about freedom from

the biases that restrict our

115

lifestyle choices, our financial

opportunities, our creative expression.

116

In Portugal, I wasn't code switching.

117

I wasn't calculating how to present

myself to make white people comfortable.

118

I wasn't bracing for the question,

where are you really from?

119

Or the surprise compliment.

120

Wow, you speak English so well.

121

I was just Octavia.

122

A woman testing what a different

kind of life might feel like, and

123

that level of peace, that level

of self discovery and liberation.

124

It's something I didn't even know

I was missing until I had it.

125

Now let's talk about what happened to

my body in Portugal, because this is

126

where things get really interesting.

127

Within the first 30 days, I

noticed significant changes.

128

The inflammation that had been living

in my body, partly from the cancer

129

treatment, partly from stress, partly

from just existing in America as a

130

black woman, started to decrease.

131

My nervous system began to reset.

132

Some days I was so tired that I'd

take naps in the afternoon and

133

instead of feeling guilty about it,

I'd wake up feeling restored, like

134

my body was finally getting the rest.

135

It had been begging me for.

136

My sleep patterns, which have been erratic

since menopause started to stabilize.

137

I was consistently getting seven

to eight hours of sleep per night.

138

Some nights I'd go to bed early, other

nights later, but the quality of sleep

139

was different, deeper, more restorative.

140

My mind felt clearer.

141

I wasn't stressed, I wasn't anxious

about the next thing on my to-do list.

142

I was just present.

143

And here's the big one.

144

My digestion issues, which have been a

daily struggle since my colorectal cancer

145

surgery were significantly minimized.

146

Some foods that were fine

yesterday might cause issues.

147

Today, it's exhausting to navigate.

148

But in Portugal, those symptoms

were so much better, not gone

149

completely, but manageable in a way

they haven't been since my surgery.

150

Two years ago, my body

was telling me something.

151

My mind was still trying to process.

152

This environment supports your

healing in a way that home hasn't.

153

And this brings me to something

I've been reading a lot about

154

lately while I've been here.

155

Not just romance novels though.

156

Yes.

157

I've been devouring books by Kennedy

Ryan, Danielle Allen, Regina Black

158

jaquel, ER Pert, Nina Crespo,

tidy Richardson, and Maya Monique.

159

But I've also been thinking

about the themes in these books.

160

So many of the heroines in Black Romance

novels are on journeys of self discovery.

161

They're women who've been living

according to other people's rules,

162

other people's expectations.

163

And at some point in the story,

they make a choice to reclaim their

164

lives, to choose themselves, to

step into a version of their life

165

that feels true rather than safe.

166

And isn't that what I'm doing right now?

167

I spent three years in cancer treatment.

168

Three years of my body not being my own.

169

Three years of doctor's appointments and

scans and surgeries and chemotherapy.

170

Three years of other people making

decisions about my body, for my body.

171

And now for the first time since

my diagnosis, I get to decide.

172

I get to listen to what

my body is telling me.

173

I get to test different possibilities, and

my body is saying, this place feels good.

174

Keep exploring this.

175

Now, some of you might be wondering,

Octavia, didn't you also spend time

176

in Puerto Vallarta earlier this year?

177

Yes.

178

Yes I did.

179

And I need to talk about that because

this part of the story is more nuanced

180

than it might seem from May to June.

181

I was in Puerto Vallarta,

Mexico, six weeks of lush jungle

182

settings, Pacific beaches.

183

Vibrant nightlife, incredible street

tacos, and some of the warmest, most

184

welcoming people I've ever encountered.

185

And here's what I need to be honest about.

186

I fell in love with Porto Val Yata too.

187

I know that might sound confusing

given everything I just said

188

about Portugal, but stay with me.

189

Porto Val Yata offered something.

190

Portugal doesn't.

191

An immediate, vibrant energy.

192

The Mexican culture, the Spanish

language, mixing with my broken

193

attempts at conversation the

way strangers would invite me to

194

join their table at a restaurant.

195

The spontaneous music in the streets.

196

There was a warmth there,

both literal and figurative.

197

That felt like being

wrapped in an embrace.

198

Yes, I battled mosquitoes.

199

Yes, I had allergic reactions that made

me swell up like Martin Lawrence in that

200

episode of Martin with Tommy Hearns.

201

But even that became part of the

story, part of the adventure.

202

What I realized while I was there, and

what's become even clearer now that I've

203

spent time in Portugal, is that these two

places pull on different parts of my soul.

204

Porto Vallarta speaks to the part of

me that craves community, immediate

205

connection, color, and heat.

206

It's the part of me that wants to be

seen, that wants to dance in the street.

207

That wants life to feel

like a celebration.

208

Portugal speaks to the part of me

that needs restoration, contemplation,

209

softness, and space to breathe.

210

It's the part of me that's been

healing from cancer that needs my

211

nervous system to reset, that craves

beauty without overstimulation.

212

And here's where it

gets really interesting.

213

While I was trying to make sense of

these two magnetic pulls, someone

214

introduced me to something called

astrocartography, which is essentially

215

astrology applied to geography.

216

It shows where different planetary

lines run across the world and

217

how those energies might affect

you in different locations.

218

When I looked at my astrocartography map,

I saw clear significant lines running

219

through both Porto Vallarta and Portugal.

220

Two completely different

parts of the world.

221

Two completely different energies, but

both calling to something real in me,

222

and instead of seeing that as confusing,

I'm starting to see it as expansive.

223

Maybe the question isn't

which one is right.

224

Maybe the question is, what

does each place offer me at

225

different seasons of my life?

226

Because right now, in this moment,

227

rebuilding, still learning how to

trust my body again after cancer.

228

Portugal is what my body needs.

229

The slowness, the restoration,

the way my inflammation decreases

230

and my nervous system calms down.

231

But Porto Vallarta that might

be calling me towards something

232

else, something more immediate.

233

Something that meets a different need.

234

What I know for sure is this, both places

made me feel more alive than I felt in

235

the United States in a very long time.

236

Both places allowed me to be fully

myself without code switching,

237

without performing, without

managing other people's comfort.

238

And maybe that's the real lesson here.

239

Not that there's one perfect

place, but that there are places

240

in this world where black women can

exhale, where we can live fully.

241

We can heal and thrive and just be,

that's why I'm actively working on

242

digital nomad Visa applications for

both Portugal and Porto Vallarta,

243

because I don't have to choose just one.

244

I can build a life that includes both.

245

You know what's interesting?

246

While I've been here in Portugal,

I've been thinking a lot about

247

the romance novels I've been

reading and podcasting about.

248

In episode 22, I talked about

solo adventures and how books

249

became my passport before I could

travel internationally myself.

250

In episode 16, I discussed love

after 40 and how women in their

251

fifties can still get it, and not

just romantically, but in terms of

252

living fully and unapologetically.

253

In episode 17, I unpack the soft

life and what it means for black

254

women to choose ease over struggle.

255

And now sitting here in Portugal, I

realize I've been living out the themes

256

I've been talking about in these episodes.

257

The heroines in the books I

love Hendricks from Kennedy.

258

Ryans can't get enough.

259

Ella from Taner.

260

Pertz Ella gets the D.

261

Macy from Marley Ray's Macy, they

all have one thing in common.

262

At some point they make a radical choice

to prioritize their own happiness.

263

To step away from what's expected

and step into what's true.

264

That's what I'm doing.

265

And just like in those novels,

this journey isn't about

266

running away from something.

267

It's about running towards something,

toward a life that feels aligned toward

268

a version of myself that isn't exhausted,

isn't performing, isn't just surviving.

269

I'm choosing to explore what

thriving could look like, and that

270

exploration itself is the plot twist.

271

Okay, so let's get into the real talk

because I know some of you are thinking,

272

girl, if you love it so much, why

aren't you already there permanently?

273

Great question.

274

And the answer is, I'm actively

working on it, but it's a process.

275

Right now, I'm navigating the

Visa application process for both

276

Portugal and Puerto Vallarta.

277

For Portugal, I'm working on

getting a digital nomad visa, which

278

would allow me to live there while

continuing to run my business remotely.

279

Porto Vallarta has a similar program

that I'm exploring, and let me tell

280

you, the process is not simple.

281

Appointments at the Portuguese consulate

are nearly impossible to get right now.

282

I've been trying for weeks and I've

learned from the people I've met

283

here, many of whom are American

expats, that a huge number of

284

Americans are moving to Portugal.

285

The country is becoming

increasingly popular, which means

286

the systems are overwhelmed.

287

So there's that logistical hurdle,

and then there's the financial piece.

288

I need to make sure I have the consistent

income streams and financial structure

289

that supports this lifestyle long term.

290

I'm a PR expert.

291

I have my podcast.

292

I have my wellness business, but I need to

ensure everything is set up in a way that

293

allows me to live and work from anywhere.

294

And if I'm being completely honest,

there's also uncertainty, not

295

uncertainty about whether I want this,

but uncertainty about the logistics,

296

the timing, the best path forward.

297

Am I building toward Portugal as a

home base with Porto Vallarta visits?

298

Or am I creating a truly nomadic

life that flows between both?

299

These are questions I'm actively

working through, because let's be real.

300

How many black women do you know who

are building location independent lives?

301

At 54?

302

How many cancer survivors do you know

who are completely restructuring their

303

existence to prioritize healing and

joy over stability and familiarity?

304

It's not the norm.

305

And for black women especially,

we're taught to play it safe, to be

306

practical, to think about everyone

else before we think about ourselves.

307

But here's what I keep coming back to.

308

If not now, when I survive

cancer, I'm in remission.

309

I have my health, I have my clarity.

310

I have a business I can run from anywhere.

311

I have a deep, undeniable

knowing that this exploration is

312

exactly what I need to be doing.

313

So yeah, there's uncertainty, but

there's also commitment to the process.

314

And sometimes committing to the

exploration is more important

315

than having all the answers.

316

Now, I want to talk about what this

means for the podcast because I know

317

some of you might be wondering, does

this mean culture lit is changing?

318

The answer is.

319

Yes and no.

320

The heart of this podcast celebrating

black romance novels, black women's joy,

321

and the incredible authors who create

these stories, that's not changing.

322

That will always be the foundation

of culture lit, but I am expanding.

323

Because the truth is my life has

expanded my understanding of what it

324

means to live fully, to prioritize

wellness, to build a business that

325

supports the life I actually want.

326

All of that has deepened

through this experience.

327

So moving forward, you'll still

get the book recommendations, the

328

author interviews, the deep dives

into the themes and tropes we love.

329

But you'll also hear more about wellness

and self care as a form of resistance.

330

What it means to prioritize rest,

joy, and healing, especially for

331

black women entrepreneurship and

the business of storytelling.

332

How black romance authors are

building empires and what we

333

can learn from their strategies.

334

Exploring international living as

a black woman, the realities, the

335

challenges, the unexpected joys.

336

Post 50 reinvention, what it looks

like to completely restructure your

337

life in your fifties and beyond.

338

I'm calling this evolution.

339

Entrepreneurship meets wellness

through storytelling because

340

that's what I'm living and that's

what I want to share with you.

341

In one of my next upcoming episodes,

you'll hear from my interview with

342

author Jaqua J, which will air on

October 29th, and after that, I'm

343

committing to a weekly release schedule.

344

Every week you'll get either a solo

episode diving into one of these themes

345

or an author business spotlight where

I interview a Black Romance author

346

about their creative process and their

business journey, because the two are

347

connected, the art and the business,

the storytelling and the strategy.

348

And I wanna give you both.

349

So here's my invitation to you.

350

What would it look like

to romanticize your life?

351

Not in a performative Instagram

aesthetic kind of way, but in a real

352

deep, I'm going to structure my days

around what brings me joy kind of way.

353

What would it look like to listen

to your body the way I'm learning to

354

listen to mine, to notice where you feel

expansive and where you feel constricted.

355

What would it look like to make a choice?

356

Even a scary one that moves you

toward exploring the life you actually

357

want rather than staying in the life

you think you're supposed to have.

358

I'm not saying you need to apply for

international visas, but I am saying

359

pay attention to what lights you up.

360

Pay attention to where you feel most

yourself, and then ask yourself, what

361

would it take to explore more of that?

362

Because here's what I've learned

over these past several months

363

between Porto Vallarta and Portugal.

364

Life is too short to spend it performing

someone else's version of success.

365

Life is too precious to waste

it on relationships, jobs, or

366

environments that drain you.

367

And life, especially after cancer,

especially after hardship, especially

368

after you've stared mortality in

the face is meant to be lived,

369

not endured, not survived, lived.

370

As I sit here recording this from this

hilltop home in Lule with the ocean

371

in the distance and the Portuguese

sun streaming through those floor

372

to ceiling windows, I feel something

I haven't felt in a very long time.

373

Clarity about the next step,

not certainty about every

374

detail of how this will unfold.

375

Not absolute conviction that Portugal

is the answer forever or that I

376

have all the logistics figured out.

377

But clarity that this exploration,

this willingness to test different

378

versions of my life is exactly

what I need to be doing right now.

379

My body is telling me something

important, and for the first

380

time in years, I'm listening.

381

And if you've been waiting for

permission to explore what's calling

382

you, consider this your sign.

383

Thank you for being here with me today.

384

Thank you for allowing me to

share this vulnerable, messy,

385

beautiful journey with you.

386

Thank you for being part of

the Culture Lit Community.

387

If this episode resonated

with you, please share it with

388

someone who needs to hear it.

389

Tag me on Instagram or threads at becoming

Octavia and let me know what's one thing

390

you're exploring for yourself today.

391

What's one possibility you're

finally allowing yourself to test?

392

And don't forget, next episode,

October 29th, I'll be sitting down with

393

author jaquel J for an author business

spotlight that you will not want to miss.

394

Until then, keep reading, keep dreaming,

and remember, your life is the greatest

395

romance novel you'll ever write.

396

And the best part you get

to decide if this chapter is

397

about settling or exploring.