Shownotes
In this episode of Inner Light, hosted by Archita, Brandy Von Holten shares a grounded, lived perspective on staying motivated when life gets hard.
This conversation is for anyone who feels stuck, inconsistent, or waiting for the “right moment.” Brandy breaks down why motivation fades, how routines carry you forward, and how small daily actions quietly shape powerful results. If you’ve been relying on bursts of inspiration, this episode offers a more honest, sustainable path.
About the Guest:
Brandy Von Holten is a martial artist, ranch owner, podcast host, and motivational speaker. She has competed internationally in taekwondo and built a working ranch from the ground up.
Episode Chapters:
00:00 – Why motivation isn’t what we think
03:10 – The meaning behind “Country Tough”
07:45 – Motivation vs routine: what actually works
12:20 – Small habits that create big change
17:05 – Turning pain into fuel for growth
21:40 – Returning to competition after 10 years
26:10 – Why failure is part of success
Key Takeaways:
- Motivation comes and goes; routines keep you moving
- Small, consistent actions matter more than big bursts
- You don’t need to feel ready to begin
- Failure is feedback, not the end
- Simplify your environment to support better habits
How to Connect With the Guest:
Website: https://www.brandyvonholten.com
Facebook & TikTok: Brandy Von Holten (Author, Speaker, Instructor)
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Transcripts
00:00:00 Archita: Motivation is one of those words we use all the time, but rarely stop to really look at. We say we have lost it. We say we are waiting for it. We scroll looking for it. We listen to a playlist hoping it finds us. But what if motivation isn't something that arrives from the outside? What if it's something you build from the inside? Day after day, through the choices you make, even when you don't feel like it. Today's guest didn't find motivation through a seminar or a self-help shelf. She found it on a sparring mat at age fourteen and the mother of a family farm in Missouri. And in the quiet decision to come back after ten years away and compete nationally again. This is a conversation about what it really takes to keep going.
00:01:00 Archita: Hello and welcome back to Inner Light, the show where we explore the quite courageous work of becoming more fully yourself. One honest conversation at a time. I'm your host, and today I'm joined by someone whose life is genuinely one of a kind. Brandy von Holten is a martial artist, author, motivational speaker, mounted archery instructor, ranch owner and podcast host whose journey spans twenty three years of competitive taekwondo and international fighting career, representing the USA in five countries. A decade of building something entirely new from the ground up. And then at a point when most people would have said that chapter is closed. The decision to come back and compete at the national championship again, her topic today is one that lives at the heart of everything she does. How to get motivated and how to actually stay that way. Brandi. Welcome to Inner Light. I am really glad you're here today.
00:02:05 Brandy Von Holten: I am so excited to be here. I love talking about motivation. You know, I didn't mean to turn out to be a motivational speaker, but here I am.
00:02:16 Archita: I'm glad you, you know, became one because you're you. Literally, your story is just so dynamic. It spans from so many things. And, uh, we all of us can I think all of us can, um, take a moment or two to learn things from you. So I think motivation is really important in all of our lives. And today you are going to teach all of us not only how to get motivated, but also how to stay on that track. So yeah, without wasting any time, let's dive into it. Um, Brandi and before we really get into the topic, I want to start somewhere personal. So, Brandy, you have lived a life that most people would describe as extraordinary. You know, martial arts at fourteen international competitions, building a ranch from the ground up, mounted archery and, and, uh, through all of it, a podcast called Country Tough. So that phrase country tough, it feels like, uh, you know, it says something real about how you move through the world. So what does it actually mean to you?
00:03:24 Brandy Von Holten: Okay, so country tough to me. You know, we, we trademarked that. Um, and then we have a lot of things that are called country tough. The reason that we did that is because our last name is difficult. Von Holten is it's, it's difficult for people. And we wanted something where people would connect to it. And, you know, everybody's connected to their own heritage and their own last name. So we wanted to have something that everybody could kind of come together with and country tough man that that explains exactly what you have to be. You have to be country because you've got to be able to figure out how to do things. All of this blue collar stuff that we do with building our own things. We train our own animals, we grow our own hay. Um, we process our own food that is country. Okay. And to be tough means that if something goes wrong, you have to deal with it. We don't have anybody around here that's going to save us from anything. And, you know, to be country tough. It just describes a lot of different people. And so we made, um, we use that now for we had a magazine called Country Tough Times. We have a horse competition called country tough trail versatility. It kind of gave us like that thread to sew everything together that we do. So that's where that came from, is just trying to have something that people would connect to. And it just explained who we are. We are country tough.
00:05:04 Archita: That's amazing. And I think you have explained the name itself, explains itself, but you know, you have explained it well as um, you know, um country tough actually means um how people in the country are tough. That's what I can get out from, you know, uh, this word. But yeah, I think it's, it's really special. It's really extraordinary. Just like you and, uh, the, the origin behind it is even more wonderful. So thank you so much for sharing that with all of us today. Brandy.
00:05:37 Brandy Von Holten: Uh. Sure thing.
00:05:40 Archita: All right. And now let's go right into the heart of your topic. You know, that is motivation. So it's something, um, motivation. It's something people talk about constantly. And. And yet it feels so slippery for for so many of them. So what's the biggest misconception you see around motivation that you think keeps people stuck before they've even started?
00:06:07 Brandy Von Holten: Okay. I think that people depend upon willpower and set of routines to pull them through. I my motivation and willpower, it goes into spikes and then it valleys out and then spikes and valleys out. So what I have that keeps me going across is my routine. So whenever I'm a spike of motivation, you know, like where I'm like, okay, I'm going to change this. I'm going to do better. That does not last. Motivation does not last. So what you have to do when you are motivated is you've got to set up all of these routines and what you're going to do each day, Those routines will carry you across that valley that you will have in motivation until you have another spike. So what I try to do is I just really try to focus on my routines, make things easier. You know, if you're trying to get up in the morning and go work out, you better put those clothes out for the next day. You know, something that's going to help it make it easier. You know, if you are on your phone, as soon as you wake up and you're just scrolling, you know, and wasting your life, do not plug that phone in beside your bed. Make it where you have to turn your alarm off and get out of your bed to turn it off, you know? And as soon as you wake up, throw the covers back on so you don't go get back into bed. So I have, that's my biggest misconception is that people think that somebody that gets a lot done is motivated all the time. No, I am not motivated all the time. It is in peaks and valleys, but my routine is solid.
00:08:02 Archita: That's really helpful, Brandy, because I believe that a motivation and consistency go hand in hand. So even when you get a surge of motivation, all of a sudden it's not going to last without a proper routine. So yeah, I think a lot of people, um, do get motivated, but they cannot stay motivated because of this misconception that they don't need routines. They just need, you know, inspiration, which is wrong. So yeah, I think that's, that's so true. Whatever you have just said, brandy and brandy. When someone is, uh, when someone is waiting for motivation to show up before they act, what's really happening there? Is it fear? Um, or is it something else underneath?
00:08:49 Brandy Von Holten: So whenever they're waiting for motivation to happen, I think that, you know what? It's kind of like love. You know, everybody thinks that whenever they meet somebody and they're going to love them, that it's going to be like fireworks and all this. But a lot of times it's it's a lot calmer than that. You know, um, there's not, there might not be this big thing that's like, wow, I woke up and I'm just done with the way that things are sometimes. There's no fireworks, okay? There's not this big fireworks. That's, um, that what motivation feels like. And I don't know if it's fear or if it's more of a, they just thought it would be bigger whenever they decided they're going to lose weight or bigger when they're going to start saving money. And it's not like this big thing. It's little bitty things. Um, like if they're trying to save money, man, if they could put back their change, put back all of their change for a week, or stop using their card and only use cash, you know? So then they're going to have to go through the pain of going and getting cash instead of using a card. You know, it's just going to slow them down. So it's like these little bitty changes add up to something huge. You know, but I think a lot of people, they just miss that whole idea that it's little bitty changes. They forget that in, you know, like the American dollar is made up of pennies. Pennies is the smallest thing. So pennies add up to dollars and it gets bigger from there. I think they just, um, bypass what, what really is going to make changes in their life is one step at a time, one hour at a time.
00:10:45 Archita: Absolutely, absolutely. And I believe that, you know, um, social media has glorified, uh, motivation so much. Um, like, just like you just described that there, there has to be fireworks, there has to be a grand gesture or sign from the universe. But most time, most of the times it's, it's a lot more calmer than that. So definitely, and what I'm hearing is that motivation isn't really, um, the starting point. It's more like something that follows action rather than something that precedes it. And, um, I think that's uncomfortable for a lot of people to hear because we have been sold this idea that, you know, we have to feel ready before we begin, but I think we need to start in order to feel ready. So yeah, I mean, you have lived a life where the feeling of ready probably came way after the decision to show up. So that's one of the greatest example.
00:11:44 Brandy Von Holten: You know, with my motivation, my motivation actually started with like a negative concept. Um, but then it turned into something positive. Um, the negative concept is, you know, there's a lot of people that have family dynamic issues, right? Like I had, I had some issues with, I was never like good enough and nobody ever told me they were proud of me. Well, I just would try to win something or work on something harder because I wanted to make my parents proud of me. But they they were never proud. They never said they were proud of me or anything. And then I just, um, after I won some stuff, I won more things. And it was, I was almost like hungry for approval, but I never got it. But then it turned me almost into, um, like almost addicted to success. But now I don't want to change this about myself, even though it started for a negative reason. And I have some other things in my life like that. Like they started for a negative reason, but I kept the trait because it's positive, you know? So now I don't need my parents approval. Like I've gotten older and I've realized that that's just, you know, waste of mental space, you know, and a waste of, of time and effort and all of that. Um, and so now I don't need that. But then I love the, me figuring out what it took for me to get things done. And it was that big push through that is not fun. That's behind the scenes. It's kind of like mastering the mundane. Like if you're wanting to become like an Olympic champion, you've got to make sure that your house is clean, your your laundry is washed, you've got groceries in the house. You know, there's no, nobody's going to, you're not going to win a medal for doing anything like mundane like that. But without that stuff getting done, you can't be successful in what you're trying to do.
00:13:51 Archita: That is such a practical and grounded advice. Honestly, that was really helpful. Brandi. So thank you once again for, um, you know, sharing it because hearing all of this from people like you who have, you know, achieved so much in life is so much helpful for us. So yeah, thank you so much. And, um, Brandi, now moving on, you came back to, uh, competitive martial arts after ten years away, ten years of building a ranch, running a business, raising a life, and then at a point where most people would be winding down from that kind of past, you went back. So I'm curious to know what was actually happening inside you in the years you were away. Was there a part of you that was quietly unmotivated or quietly waiting for something.
00:14:46 Brandy Von Holten: Okay, so not unmotivated. I, um, my husband always wanted to own his family farm. It's been in the same family since nineteen oh six. And so whenever we had the opportunity to purchase it, we did. And it caused us to move to the ranch. Well, then whenever we moved here, it had not been lived on since nineteen seventy nine. And we bought it in twenty thirteen. It was in it was destroyed. Right. It had raccoons living all on it. All the buildings had fallen down. Um, it was all grown up. Um, that for us to own the family farm, it took everything that we had. It took financially all the money that we had. It took all of our, all of our energy, um, all of our time. So I stopped fighting so that we could have this family farm, you know, and for me, I missed my my competition team. I missed the team aspect way more than the the fighting. So I was like, you know what? I'm getting older and if I'm going to do this, I have got to do it. I felt like there was unfinished business. Like I just wasn't, I wasn't done. So I, uh, I said, hey, I'm going to do this. And I, you know, we create our own schedule. So I scheduled all of our events around the competition year. And, uh, you know what, what I found out was I'm still athletic. I mean, I'm a little bit bigger and all of my kicking skills came back to me. Um, and I, I actually had more mental clarity now with that time off because I was, um, I didn't want to get hurt. So I, it just felt like it went slower with the punches and the kicks kicks coming towards me. Um, just because I'm. I'm older, I'm wiser. Right. So, um, it was just unfinished business. I always wanted to go to the Olympics and I tried to go to the Olympics. Um, I never did make it, but I fought at the Olympic Training Center and I've been to five countries. And so I just wanted to see if I could do it again. And I did, um, I went to a regional qualifier and I won second there. And then I went to nationals and my first match was the lady that's won it the last two years. Um, she's actually, I think she's second generation, um, Nigerian that lived in New York and she proceeded to mop the floor with me. It was rough, but I will tell you, I knocked her down to the ground twice. She knocked me down to the ground twice. I didn't get knocked out. And, uh, you know, I just lost the match. But I still know that I can get into the ring and and fight against the the current national heavyweight champion and um and walk out so of the ring. So I don't know. I just had unfinished business. I just wanted to prove to myself that I could still do it.
00:17:58 Archita: I think that is that is truly amazing because, um, a lot of people wouldn't have done what you have done. And I think that takes a lot of courage, you know, to go back to some something like that after years without being sure that you'll be able to do it or not, but you ended up, uh, being able to do it so, so much better. So I think that's really, really great. And it teaches all of us how, you know, we sometimes we just, we should just take the leap and see what really happens because most of the time it actually works out for us. So yeah, that's, that's truly amazing. And you know, I, I think a lot of people experience that shift and enter, interpret. Interpret it as something being wrong with them. You know, whenever they want to try something new, you know, rather than something being natural about the season they are in. So the question is, isn't why you lost the fire. It's it's whether you know how to find it again. And you clearly do. So that's, that's all the motivation you need.
00:19:05 Brandy Von Holten: Yeah. Well, and you, you know, I'll tell you something that is crazy to me is with us owning the ranch. You know, there was not a book on how to open up a horse trail riding facility on a dead family farm that you brought back. Um, I will tell you, whenever we used to try different things, like I tried hosting like a five K race here and it did not work out. The first time I tried to host this competition that was like an all around cowgirl team challenge. The first one did not have big entries in it, but then each one of those things that I had, um, after I failed and it was just catastrophic, you know, it like financially hurt us and stuff. Um, I reassessed it and I took another try at it and then they were hugely successful. And so now we've been doing the ranch thing for twelve years now. I look forward to failure because I know that it's not really failure. It's just learning. And education is never free, no matter if we're talking about a college degree or life experience. Education is never free. So I look forward to failure because I know what's going to happen later is something that is so much better than what I originally thought. Um, and it wouldn't have been possible without me failing first.
00:20:39 Archita: Exactly. And that's what we all need to learn because most of the time, most of the time, I think people don't try things, um, because of the fear of failure, but you'll never know once you actually try it. And it worked out so well for you. So I think that is, um, that's going to be one of the inspirations for our listeners today, you know, to actually take the leap and try regardless of the consequences. So Brandy, thank you so much for sharing all of the amazing, wonderful experiences today. I think, uh, you know, you have helped a lot of listeners today. Uh, so yeah, thank you for that. And Brandy.
00:21:24 Brandy Von Holten: Thank you. Yeah.
00:21:26 Archita: Yeah. So, Brandy, before we close, I want to ask you something for the person who's listening to this episode and feeling like they've been, uh, coasting for a while, maybe they had fire once and they are not sure where it went. Or maybe they are looking at someone like you and thinking, I could never do that. So what would you most want them to hear? Not as a speaker, but as someone who's actually lived it?
00:21:56 Brandy Von Holten: Um, I would tell them that it's never as bad as what they think it's going to be. Um, everybody that they're going to be competing or doing the stuff against has the same fears. And, um, a lot of people are going to get so motivated by the fact that they are going to try something that you're going to find support there. It's just, um, you, a lot of times people build something up to be way more difficult than what it is. And so do it and just be like, I'm going to do it and I'm going to fail. Like, go ahead and do it. Even though you think that you're going to fail and then plan on doing it again. So use the one time, prepare as good as you can just to get your feet wet. And you know, what ends up happening is after you, um, get your feet wet, you actually will be like, okay, that wasn't that bad. And then you'll end up doing well that year that you started in. But if you go into the mindset of, I'm going to do this for a two year time period instead of one, um, that seems to help a lot of people out. Like they think that they're going to have like a warm up year and then really go back after it the second year afterwards. Um, and then they end up doing wonderful. It's just nothing's ever as hard as what you think it's going to be.
00:23:24 Archita: Exactly. Nothing is ever hard as you think it's going to be. I think this is what all of us needed to hear today. So yeah, Randy, that was such a grounded, um, and practical advice once again. So yeah, I think this conversation is going to sit with me for a very long time. And, and if I had to hold on to one thing, from everything you have shared today, it's this that motivation isn't a feeling that you wait for. It's actually a choice that you make again and again in the direction of who you've already decided to be. So Brandy, uh, for anyone listening who wants to hear more from you, find your podcast or visit Von Holten Ranch, or just follow along with everything you're building. Where do you want to send them?
00:24:15 Brandy Von Holten: I would like to send them to my website, which is Brandy von Holten dot com or, um, Facebook or TikTok for Brandy von Holten on Facebook, it's Brandy von Holten, author, speaker, instructor. That's my that's my professional one. And I do ice water baths and all sorts of things on there, like holistic health. So you've been warned. Okay. You're going to see a lady in her forties getting into an ice water bath. Okay. You you some things you can't unsee. Okay. But that's me being motivated to take back over my health.
00:24:51 Archita: So that's amazing. That's that's so cool. And yeah, we will have everything linked in the show notes. So don't worry about writing anything down. Just scroll down after this episode and you'll find it all there waiting for you. So Randi, thank you. Genuinely. This was one of those conversations that reminded me why I do this show this, this has been amazing. And I, I truly feel a lot motivated tonight. So thank you for that.
00:25:23 Brandy Von Holten: All right. Well, thank you very much. And let's go slay the day.
00:25:27 Archita: Definitely. And to everyone listening, if something in this episode stirred something in you, pay attention to that. that small steering, that's your inner light and it doesn't need conditions to come back to life. It just needs you to decide following your light wherever you listen to podcasts, share this episode with someone who needs a reason to keep going, and I'll be back with you soon. This is our cheetah and you've been listening to Inner Light. Take good care.
