OUR HOSTS: 

Corinne Foxx - @corinnefoxx

Natalie McMillan - @nataliemcm and @shopnataliemcmillan 

What we're drinking: Clendenen Family Vineyards Borgo Buon Natale Tocai Friulano 

TOPIC: 

Despite how simple it’s portrayed on TV and in movies, there's a lot of legal hoops that couples are required to jump through before actually being married. We break down the differences between a marriage license and a marriage certificate, how to change your last name if you choose to, and all of the different legal processes that go into getting married. We highlight some rules that different states have and explain why you shouldn’t leave the legal stuff until the last minute. 

In this episode, we discuss:

• The average cost of a marriage license 
• The benefits of applying for a confidential marriage license 
• The easiest place to get your marriage license 
• What an officiant is and what’s required of them 
• The best time to change your last name 
• What the process is like for marrying a non-US citizen 
• Debunking myths about common-law marriage 

EPISODES MENTIONED: 

Episode 99 - How To Embrace Being Single 

Episode 78 - How To Fall In Love With Yourself 

END OF THE SHOW: 

Corinne and Natalie introduce Hottie of the Week: Jason Segel 

WINE RATING:

Clendenen Family Vineyards Borgo Buon Natale Tocai Friulano  = 7.5 / Jason 

WRAP UP:

To wrap up the episode, Corinne and Natalie play Would You Rather. Corinne asks Nat to choose between getting rich in a way that disappoints her family, or just making enough money to live. She also asks her to decide between going to an intimate birthday party for someone she doesn't know, or organizing a huge party for someone she does know. Nat asks Corinne to choose between spending a week alone in some sort of tank in the ocean, or a station in outer space. 

We have a newsletter for our Am I community. You can sign up for the newsletter on our website: amidoingthisrightpod.com

You can email us for episode ideas or Random Advice: amidoingthisrightpod@gmail.com

Follow us on Instagram: @amidoingthisrightpod 

Don't forget to rate and review the podcast! It really helps us grow!

Hey welcome back to another episode of am I doing this right? I'm Corrine box. And

I'm Natalie Macmillan and we are best friends confidants millennials

and the hosts of am I doing this right? A life how to podcast from the perspective of non experts.

And each week we cover a new topic and we drink a new bottle of wine.

And this is a very appropriate occasion to drink wine. Oh, yes, because we are talking how to get married to get married. We're going to be talking about the differences between a marriage license and a marriage certificate, how to change your last name if you choose to, and all of the different legal processes that go into getting married. This is not like how to plan a wedding. No, no, no, no. This

is like how to legally get

00:51

a joint. Yeah,

there's so many hoops to jump through. And I'm like, Oh, we learned a lot. Even if you have no plans to get married. It's very interest. It's very

interesting. Yeah. And at the end of the episode we are playing. Would you rather have two good ones for you?

Dang, I feel like I don't have any good ones. No, I have I have great ones for you. Also, Corinne was sick. And your voice sounds really good. You know when you'd like that sick

voice and it's like now like that. What's happening? Well, it's

like raspy like, in a good way. I'm

no longer sick. Oh, no, I know. Yeah, sure. And

but like, you know, when like your voice sounds cool for a few days after,

should I record like an audiobook or a good thing?

I heard somebody I heard somebody say that. Whenever you get this record your outgoing voicemail.

01:35

Oh, I don't have one of those. Joanie. That's one and it was just Hi, you reach Joe.

Like leave a number. You leave your whatever for you know?

Yeah, my mom's is she goes, Hi, you've reached Connie. And I'm not able to get to the phone right now. So you can leave a message or text me? Has she had it forever? Yes. Like when texting was a new thing. She went or text me. She thought she was very innovative with that. And I was like, she kind of also was doing a voice as if she's some type of color girl. And I'm like, That's not your voice.

She was really feeling it. My mom's has been the same literally since like 2003. And it's Hi, this is Marina. Please leave me a message. Thanks. That's like literally exactly how it sounds. I've heard it at least 400 times more. I'm

definitely more than that. For sure. Okay, now what are we drinking this? b You're

drinking? It is a white. Hold on. Let me lean down and grab it. All right. It is the clendenen family vineyard from Santa Maria Valley. So

02:46

that's near you.

It's mid California. On the coast. It's like near San Luis Obispo, Florida. And this is called Tokai free you land No,

02:58

I trust it. If that's how you said it. I

trust them. Then it says Bourgault one that pal? What accent are you doing? I assume that to town. Okay. Okay. I don't know what Bourgault one is, but I know not how is birth? Because that's my name. Yeah. Doesn't say what it is. It just says it's a white a white song. I'm gonna love that for us. Give it a shot here.

You guys, we have exciting news. We have a breakthrough. I don't even know if it's a breakthrough. We do. Our baby daddies reached out. Oh, our baby daddies. And this is misleading because there are a lot of a lot of babies. A lot of baby daddies. But the baby daddy, the baby daddy, who has I think been in almost every single episode. Yeah. reached out to us.

Would you? I think that when we say things on this podcast it manifests because I also think it might have been that same episode where I was referencing the Queen dying and the Queen died. And if that was me, I apologize universe. Okay, sorry. I'm

not going to give you guys under Oh, yeah. Baby Daddy. The Pew Research Center reached out to a emailed us. Can you unbelievable. I was at a dinner with friends. And I looked at our email like, oh my god, the Pew Research Center just emailed me and Natalie and my friends were like, oh, like and one person was like, what's the Pew Research? What?

You they're only our baby daddies. They're only the father's to our children.

They reached out and also they did offer us a tour. Yeah, they did if they sort of wherever in Washington DC. Yeah. And

they were like, you know, it's kind of just like a lot of cubicles, but if they want to see it, and we're like we do,

I'm very interested. What are they currently researching? Oh, I would love

to know. And they also said if we ever need like one of them to be an expert they would they said that. Yes. Natalie Shut up. They said that in the email. If there were like, if you ever need an expert like, then we have one here at Pew.

05:04

Unbelievable.

I know I just want to

thank everyone out there for listening to this point, I

know I'm like, who was listening that tipped them off or just somebody app you?

Oh, sorry. Oh, let me try wine. Whoa. Also, that was a very light pour there. Well,

usually we only do two to tiny pour. I appreciate it, but it's just like a sip. I really feel bad about the amount of wine we waste on this show. No. Okay, so let's get into how to get married. And why we chose this topic, Natalie? Yes. Well, we're at the age where a lot of our friends are starting to get engaged or married. And we realize that we don't really know what all is required to actually get married. Because we know you don't just like walk down the aisle. And it's like, then like, that's not how it works. There's a lot of hoops that couples are required to jump through before actually being married. So we wanted to see what those hoops may be. What the hoops maybe, yes, but you know, we love a fact. Can we get into some facts about marriage in the US?

Yes, well, half of Americans ages 18 and older, were married in 2017. A share that has remained relatively stable in recent years, but has steadily been decreasing since 1991. factor driving this change is that Americans are staying single longer. The median age at first marriage has reached its highest point on record. 30 years for men and 28 years for women in 2018. According to the US Census Bureau, and in 2015, for every 1000 married adults ages 50 and older 10 had divorced, up from five in 1990. And among those ages 65 and older, the divorce rate roughly tripled since 1990. Oh, the boomers lose again.

We also have to do an event. It's seemingly how to get divorced. Oh, so yeah, that's true. Or

a prenup episode. We didn't put prenups in here.

You know what I thought about it, right after we hung up. And I was like, there's so much information here. We can't get into it.

But also prenups feel like its own episode.

It's a whole thing. It's a whole thing. Because for the most part, people are like,

you know, yes. Well, another fact is that remarriage is on the rise in 2013 23% of married people had been married before compared to just 13% in 1960. Also, sizable minorities of married people are members of a different religious group than their partner. But marriages and partnerships across political party lines are relatively rare. How fun would that be though?

I get that ooh,

I don't think sorry. Fun. For a sitcom.

Oh, for a sitcom. Perhaps we'll didn't they try to make that movie about it. And it was horrible movie. It was, Oh, I gotta remember that purple heart on Netflix. And it was about a girl who a type one diabetic who married a marine for the insurance.

08:15

And she was a liberal, and he was a Republican. And then

blue and red together as purple but also purple heart because he's in the military. Oh, wow. There's so many strong, it's very, very

well, when it comes to politics, a 2016 Pew Research Center survey found that 77% of both Republicans and Democrats who were married or living with a partner said their spouse or partner was in the same party, which I you know, it's so unfortunate that we're at this point that we're so divided. You can't even love somebody of the other political party. But yeah, I mean, it does make sense given the current circumstances, the current climate, it's really making sense, but not so we hear this a lot. Like there's marriage licenses. And then there's a marriage certificate and what what is a marriage license? Like, what is that? Right?

So a marriage license is what you get first, and it's basically an application to be married. It's not a free application, though. Most states the fees around like 75 or 100 bucks, okay? Once you filled it out, had your ceremony gotten it signed, and your officiant has turned it back into the county, then you receive the certificate, okay. So you have the license, and then once you know, you aisle, the whole thing, then it becomes a certificate, but state marriage laws, they are each different. So you need to look up your own states. And a lot of them have different rules, okay. A lot of them have also been changing rapidly. So some of the like, Stranger rules, you had to do a blood test. A lot of them rely on blood tests. Also it was only for the women, which of course worse to test for like certain STDs and stuff, right? Like you weren't, you weren't swindling this man to marry you and then you had like syphilis or something this

is giving, like virginity check. Yeah, exactly like a hymen check.

Yeah. So but you know, because I think people realize like, that's pretty fucking weird. A lot of them have changed that a lot of states also had to do physical exam. I don't know why. I think also, some of the states were checking to make sure that they weren't related to each other.

That makes sense. And also maybe, like verifying somebody's age, they didn't have like a license, like, you know, let you do that

via physical. I don't know. Regardless, it's fucking weird. It's weird. It's weird. It's all weird. So you should definitely check your county marriage license Bureau office, the County Clerk's the City Clerk's, or your town clerk's office, before making any sort of plan to do anything, because you might need to be prepared. Okay. However, the blood testing, Montana is the only state that still requires that as a requirement to apply for the license. So

11:08

out of 49 states, it's just Montana.

Yes. And then another special thing is in California, there are two different marriage licenses, which I think is very interesting. So there's a public one and a confidential one. And actually, the confidential one, there's a ton of benefits. So number one, no witnesses necessary. It's provided to you on the spot. It's just like, Here you go. The license can be brought to you right before your wedding. Nobody needs to know unless you want them to the only way that somebody other than the couple can get it is with a court order. So like, you know how you can like publicly look up. Yeah, you can't do that if you have a confidential marriage license.

And so I think because celebrities were, there's a lot of celebrities that you're like, like Mindy Kaling and BJ Novak could probably be made, they could definitely be secretly, you know, Damien,

and we would never know because nobody can record. Interesting. I was reading this thing. And this lawyer was like, there is no reason not to get a confidential, I will be getting a confidential. Oh, absolutely. Well, if I even, there's so many hoops. There's a lot of hoops. We'll start through the hoops straightaway.

Yeah. Okay. So step one to getting married is to set a date, and a place for your wedding. So before you can apply for a marriage license, you need to know where and when you'll be getting married. Why you might be asking well, because you typically have to file your marriage license application in the county in which you will be getting married. So you can't if you're getting near a little destination, you have to apply there. Okay. Furthermore, marriage licenses expire. Some, for example, expire after 90 days. So if you're planning your wedding one year in advance of the date, then you have to wait to apply for the marriage license until you're within that deadline. Otherwise, you'll end up having to apply all over all over again, which is the last thing a couple wants to do when they're really busy and planning their wedding and doing a bunch of stuff. There's actually only five states and Washington DC that don't have an expiration date. And those are Georgia, Idaho, Mississippi, New Mexico, and South Carolina. Otherwise, time to tick in

Yes. Because if you want it to become the certificate, the license has to be first. Exactly You can't cannot expire Exactly. And on the other hand, you

can't wait until the very last minute either. So there's typically a few day waiting period from filing to getting your license. So you should plan to file at least one week before your wedding to make sure everything is in order works out. In Texas, for example, you must wait at least 72 hours before getting married after you apply for a marriage license to actually get married. Meaning that if you put this off until two or three days before the wedding, the license wouldn't really be valid. So you really have to go into your state your county and understand okay, when is this? Like how long do I have with this license before? I can? It expires? Right?

And also, and I could be wrong about this. But I think that's what's special about Nevada and Vegas is that there's no waiting period. So you can just roll up to the window and be like we're married now. Because I guess the waiting period is so that doesn't happen. In case you're like hammered or something right, exactly. The next thing you're going to do is you're going to visit the county clerk. The easiest place for you to get the marriage license is the County Clerk's Office. If all documentation is in order, you can plan to spend about an hour there. You can even try to make an appointment beforehand so that you don't have to wait too long. Generally you and your significant other must both be present at time of the marriage license application. You want to make sure that you don't show up empty handed because you'll both need to show proof of your identity. each day's requirements are a little bit different. So again, be sure to check with your county clerk before heading in to find out what they specifically require. And if you're Montana, prepare to give blood. Typically, however, you'll just need like a driver's license or passport, but they may also require a birth certificate. Some states also require a witness for the marriage license application. So you might need to ask a family member or a friend who's known you at least six months to tag on them. Once you've proven your identity, you've turned in the paperwork, you've paid your fee, then you'll be given the marriage license, some states will hand you it right then in there, but others will mail it to you within a few days waiting Behram waiting period.

Okay, so the next step is to get signatures from your officiant and marriage license witnesses. So naturally, the couple must be present when it's time to sign the marriage license post ceremony. But it's better to get this taken care of early on before the party gets going. And the drinks start at the knowing. And this is one wedding detail that you do not want to forget. So after you have your ceremony, y'all gotta find it together under way you can't just do it like right beforehand. I confused about why you have to have a ceremony. What about courthouse weddings? What what is a courthouse? What

will the courthouse they still have the officiant instead? Why do you have to do that? What is that? I guess? It's like some sort of, it's a person that legally says, Yes, this is valid. So here's your certificate,

I can design the thing I can be like I am married to you. You know,

it's a great question.

Interesting, don't have rooted in Christianity anyway, probably. Whoever legally performed your ceremony, whether it was a judge, a religious leader, or a friend ordained for the day must also sign the license. There will be a line for them to sign their name as well as specify their title or ordination. But note there are a few states Colorado, Wisconsin, DC and parts of Pennsylvania where you can self unite or self Solman ice solid my solemn is my marriage, which here we go, which means that not only does the officiant not need to sign your marriage license, you don't need to have one in the first place. That makes sense to me. Right between me and somebody else why did somebody else I'd be like yeah, but

I wonder if like in DC Do you still have to have somebody that's there to say

like yes, they did this know what says it said you don't have to have one in the first place but an officiant Do you still have to have a witness? Oh, that's your if you're in DC, you're gonna have to look at a person Yeah, you will have to look that up yourself. But let's let's go over the officiant thing really quick. So a wedding officiant is the leader of the wedding ceremony, and officiant whether secular or religious works with a couple in the months before the wedding to craft the ceremony, which may include your personal vows, readings, music selections, and more. They may also provide premarital counseling, the officiant must be legally ordained to perform weddings in your state and understand your jurisdictions laws as they pertain to the marriage license. Okay, so back to your marriage license. So on top of the officiant, you also need two witnesses to sign the license as well. These could be your parents, your maid of honor and best man or any friends you nominate for the honor, they must be physically present and well watch the two of you sign the marriage license. In most states, the marriage license witnesses must also be over the age of 18. Typically, you will need two witnesses but in some states you only need one. Okay. And then after all this is done after the ceremony. It is the officiant which I thought was interesting officiants responsibility to return the marriage license to the county clerk either by mail or in person. And after that, you are all set. You will. Depending on where you live, you will either be mailed a certified copy of your marriage certificate or you need to go in person to pick up the certified copy. But

that is so interesting. And now I'm having a flashback to my dad's wedding where everybody was plastered, and it was like 11pm and I was the only one that was like, okay to drive because the officiant left the license and they were like you have to bring it to the hotel so I had to drive it but I didn't know what I was doing. That's what you're like, why am I giving you the

19:34

officiant doing that? Like it just feels odd.

Also, the officiant was simply my dad's friend Paul. You know, Paul? Oh, yes. Also my brother in law's order is very simple, apparently to be ordained.

So you can go on the internet. You can do everything on the internet. You really can't. I will downhill.

Okay, now, this is where it gets fun. all kinds of crazy, changing your last name. Yeah. So if you're planning on changing your name, during your visit to the county clerk to apply for your marriage license, that's the best time to do it. While you still retain your maiden name until you actually get married, this will let the court officially know what your new name will be. Not only do you need to know what you want your official last name to be, but your middle name as well, because a lot of people do their middle name as their maiden, right? You have a lot of options. Obviously, you can keep your name exactly the same. You can take your partner's name or vice versa. You can even make an entirely new last name, we have a friend that's probably going to do that. They're going to combine their names together and make a

Oh, I hope they do that because they do so freaking cute. Yeah, no,

this is great. If you haven't decided, if you're going to change your name, you can of course wait until a later time. However, if you wait, the only way to alter it down the road is through an official name change, which costs hundreds of dollars. So if you can figure out what you'd like to do before obtaining your marriage license, it'll save you time and money down the road.

It's a it's a one stop shop and get it all done, then yeah.

And then once you have it changed, you have to obtain certified copies. So almost everywhere, you'll need to officially change your last name, they're going to require proof of your marriage in order to accept the name change. So that's where certified copies of your marriage certificate come in. While the original version of your marriage certificate will likely stay on file with the county you married in the county can provide you with government issued duplicates that will be accepted by other government entities and financial institutions as official proof of your marriage. And these can be purchased through the County Clerk's office where you filed your marriage certificate.

21:50

I did not know that at all. At all,

you know, you got to update more shit to Yeah, you

got to update first and foremost your social security card, which when we were writing this I was that's where I said, Where is my social security card. That's where I lost me, where I asked my mom for it. And I like I knew where I'd put it. But tonight, I checked and it wasn't there. And then I'm like, Does my mom

see I'm so cynical about the future. I'm like, we're not even going to have social security. What's the point? Okay, so

it's important because if the name on your Social Security records doesn't match the name you'd like on your news driver's license, your new driver's license will be declined or denied. The same goes for your passport. So you can apply for a new social security card by mail or in person. And if you plan on applying in person, you can expedite the process by filling out the application and advance and there's no charge for updating your social security card. That's interesting because they they find a way to charge you for damn near literally everything. You also have to do a driver's license, right. And you also have to your driver's license. So after updating your social security card, the next place to change your name is on the form of ID you use most in everyday life. For most people, this is going to be your driver's license, but a state or military issued ID also works. So changing your name on your driver's license must be done in person. So budget time, bring a stack that go to the DMV.

And while you're there, you also get a new photo. Okay, so hey, do a full beat. I will say my last driver's license photo love.

Can I have my passport photo was the best photo I've ever taken in my life. I was like, This is my one when Okay, yeah.

Okay, so most states consider a name change to be a part of the like renewal process. So you'll want to fill out a license renewal paperwork in advance to save time on how many hours you're about to spend at the DMV. Yeah, so some other items that you're, you're going to need to update. Natalie just just so you guys are aware. So they're on your radar

and best out on notepad and a pen because you're going to need to change your passport, Global Entry or TSA PreCheck if you've got it, your insurance bank accounts and credit card you also you have to inform your HR at work. It doesn't make sense because

it's like I have a new name. Yeah, that's true.

Oh, yeah, they probably change your email. We should announce your name change professionally. So if email is your main source of communication at work, send an email from your updated address to all of your regular contacts, letting them know that you'll be using the new email address featuring your new last name going forward. That you know you should probably also update your social media channels but a good tip here would be for the first like six months or something have like your first name and then your maiden name and then your new name just so like if people are looking for and maybe still aren't, you know they don't really remember I still call a lot of my friends who are married by their maiden names just because I I have not gotten in the habit I know so hard. So yeah, Facebook Instagram, whatever, and anything else that you just feel your LinkedIn, LinkedIn, whatever. There's a lot of places that your names sit. Now, what about getting married if you're not a US

citizen? Oh, okay, so contrary to popular belief, simply getting married in the US does not change your immigration status, citizenship or provide you with a green card, change your travel documents, etc. You'll need a special visa for this called the K one visa, which allows a person to be in America for 90 days before needing to be married to legally say

shout out to 90 day fiance, they all get their K one visa, and then they get here and they have 90 days to get married.

This makes so much sense. My French teacher, she was British actually, she was in the US and got married and was what it was. It was a it was a big headache for her. Yeah, no, it's a big deal. Okay, so the intention of a Travel Visa is a temporary visit. If you want to get married during your visit, then return home before your visa expires. That's okay, but a Travel Visa should not be used with the intention of entering the United States to marry, stay permanently and adjust status. The Fiance and Spouse Visas are designed for this purpose. Yeah, and that's the k one, the k one. Yeah. So before making any wedding or travel plans, you should check with the local county clerk or marriage official where you want to get married to make sure you have all the documentation that is necessary so that your marriage will also be recognized in your own home country. documents should be translated into English if your country's first language is not as such, and can double check to make sure your home country will recognize your marriage. If you're married in the US. If you are already in America, you can ask your country's consulate in the US. Oh, that's very interesting. My chiropractor is near the I want to say like, is it Qatar? Oh, Qatar consulate on the same floor. Interesting. There's there's like an ice scanner. It's very interesting. Oh, anyways, under the public policy exception, if your US marriage violates the public policy of your home country, then your marriage would not be automatically valid. If you are having a destination wedding in the US and intend on having family and friends with you, you need to make sure they have the necessary travel documents like passports,

etc. That also very much checks out. I had a question Natalie. When

27:33

we were doing this. I was like, Okay,

I've heard a lot about common law married, right? I feel like growing up and like sitcom like they just like brought it I don't like seeing sitcoms this episode. But sitcoms are on my mind. Have

27:47

you seen it? Oh, at the very top. Yes. But I feel like they just were talked about a lot. Yeah.

Is that a real thing? Right, or is it an urban legend? I

know and I know so many people that have been together for like 15 years and I'm like, so are you? Are you married? Commonly?

27:59

Yes.

Oh nine California, because common law marriage is allowed in only a minority of state. Okay, so a common law marriage is a legally recognized marriage between two people who have not purchased a marriage license or had their marriage solemnized by a ceremony, okay. The states that common law marriage does exist. It's Colorado, Montana, Iowa, Kansas, New Hampshire, South Carolina, Texas and Utah. In New Hampshire, for example, persons cohabitating and acknowledging each other as husband and wife and generally reputed to be such for the period of three years and until the death of one of them shall thereafter be deemed to have been legally married. So literally, if you're like roommates with somebody that you're like, I'm married to this person for three years hobby.

28:54

If you just say Hubby, and wifey they're like that's legit three

years that's a blink of an eye me and you have been together for four oh my god if you called him your husband you just like would automatically be married? That'd be a hobby hobby.

I do not call him that just just so you guys know

so everybody knows that's that's not a thing. All right, you guys

well that's how you get married legally.

I don't even know about planning a wedding on top of all oh my god I can see why brides are frazzled. Right Sillas and why? Again, they have no desire to do this. Well we hope

you learn more about how to get married How to obtain a marriage license and certificate and the legal processes necessary to be officially man and my man we man and man wife and one woman they and then they they have a whatever you are married

love all of them. We love them all. Yeah.

Okay, not so let's go back on this wine we've been drinking.

Yay. Let me once again remind me of the remind me remind a As the name Clen Dannon family vineyards 2016 Tokai for free you learn No, I still really don't realize you will learn No. It says from estate grown grapes planted at bn necesito. Good in the Shona thing. It blinked in the shadow speak Italian. Okay.

Okay, so do you want to introduce her hottie of the week?

Oh, I love our hottie of the week. So we picked him because he is an officiant. He has officiated a wedding. He he can't officiate your wedding. Just ask him slide into the DMS. It is Jason Segel.

30:42

Such a nice guy.

Oh my god, I truly Forgetting Sarah Marshall is one of the funniest movies. I love that movie. It's really

funny. He's also very tall. I feel like oh, he's huge. Yeah, he's like, six, six. Yeah, definitely. Okay,

so one two, Jason Segel. What are we feeling for this? Fine.

I'll give it a give it a seven and a half. I'll meet you there. All right. So I'm sure I like it. Okay, that's fine.

All right. This is the part of the episode where we play a little wrap up game and this week, it's would you rather I have two for you should I do?

Let's do both. Okay, start with one then I'm going to do mine because I only have one. Okay. Good. And then we'll do years ago. Okay.

This one was a little silly. The next one's better. Would you rather get rich in a way that disappoints your family? Or just make enough money to live?

Oh, that's a good one. Now when you say just enough money to live, is that like comfortable living? Or is that like a millennial? thing? It's

31:51

just to live. Just gonna have to

go with embarrass my family. I already you know. You know what I mean? My sister. My dad's like, you know, your sisters are doctors. And I'm over here like, painting. I'm already disappointment we should just know. A little bit. You know, this is more we're thinking.

I know fans are judgmental. Anybody knows that? I'm gonna like if your family wouldn't be cool that. Yeah, maybe that's why. But I saw that Cardi B made.

What was it? Oh my god. It was Blac Chyna. Oh, Blac Chyna. Like millions of dollars million dollars on only fans. I thought she was broke. I really do. If there wasn't only fans for feet, pics, I really would do it. I think maybe I wouldn't. But maybe I would. Clearly. Okay, my wish rather. It's not as fun. But I think about it because it's two things that scare me. Would you rather spend a week alone in some sort of tank in the ocean? In a tank in the ocean? Well, some sort of like a submarine sort of. Or in space. And you are alone space. I mean, I mean, the ocean just feels more. Or you're so nervous. Right now. I'm thinking about the ocean. Because I'm thinking about the ocean. It scares me. Exactly. I

don't know. I feel like space. I don't I wouldn't feel claustrophobic. Where I would feel claustrophobic in underwater.

It's because it's basically the same thing.

I see what you're saying with that. But there's something about I mean, I can't breathe in either situation. But it does feel like I can breathe better in space. Yeah. Even though I can't

write well, it's interesting, because if you left your little space hub, you'd have to have like an oxygen mask on, which is the same as being under if you were scuba diving. You'd have to have a little oxygen tank. I'd be up in space. Yeah, I think I would to the only thing about space that freaks me the fuck out is that it just never ends. It's just for FYI. It we watched interstellar recently. We had never seen it. Loved it. Loved it. Very deep. I loved it. Lots of layers. Yeah. So yeah, I think I would do space. Because you know, the ocean just scares the shit out of me. Yeah, I'm black. I don't feel comfortable in the ocean.

Oh, not great things happen us in the ocean. So the ocean. Okay, and here's Okay, here's my last would you rather I was actually interested in this. Would you rather go to an intimate birthday party for someone you don't know? Or organize a huge party for someone you do know. Oh,

wow. Well see this is the problem is me and organization. I don't really understand it. My brain doesn't really get it. You know, neuro divergence stand up. I just have to attend. The

it is an intimate birthday. And I you don't know you don't know anyone at all.

I don't No, no, I'm just a stranger. Yeah, you don't know anyone. They all know each other. Oh man, this kind of happened to me the other day. That's why I was like, I think just for the sake of my friend who I would be planning the big party for, I would have to take the intimate birthday because it would be as if I tried to little details, I just, it would be a disaster and I would feel bad that I let my friend down. So I'm going to have to go to the small birthday party.

That's really taking it out. For bigger for a bigger purpose.

For the greater good. Okay, guys, well, that's

35:39

our episode.

If you liked this episode, we actually have similar episodes, Episode 99. If you're not getting married, it's hard to be single. I don't embrace being single. I said How to Be Single because it's my favorite movie. Oh, yeah. I have made you watch it. Oh, yeah. Okay, I loved it. And then we also have episode 78 which is how to fall in love with yourself which I think

is still our highest listen to episodes such a good

so go back and listen to that and we will be back next week with another episode. Love you guys. Love you. Bye.