In this episode, we discuss the transformative practice of yoga for managing anger and grief with guest Paul Denniston. We focus on how unresolved anger can manifest as physical and emotional tension, and how yoga can provide a safe and effective outlet for clients to express and release these emotions. We go over the shift from a power-centric practice to one focused on healing and compassion through various somatic techniques. This episode includes practical exercises for therapists to help clients embody and process their feelings safely within a trauma-informed framework, promoting emotional regulation and recovery. 

MEET Paul Denniston

Paul Denniston is the founder of Grief Yoga® and the author of Healing Through Yoga: Transform Loss into Empowerment. The mission of Grief Yoga is to use movement, breath, and sound to release pain and suffering to connect to empowerment and love. Grief Yoga combines many different forms of yoga to channel and release anger to allow unresolved grief a compassionate space to breathe and move. His gentle work creates a safe space of movement and healing to transform trauma and connect to the resilient, loving warrior within. Paul has taught and trained this practice to thousands of therapists, counselors, yoga teachers, and health care professionals around the world.

Find out more at Grief Yoga®and connect with Paul on Instagram and Facebook

• The power of expressive practices
• Techniques for releasing anger
• Creating safety and grounding
• Witnessing and validating emotions
• Transforming pain into gratitude

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Yet many clients feel shame or confusion. Around these emotions and are unsure how to process them. In this episode, we're diving into how yoga can become a powerful channel for releasing and expressing anger in healthy embodied ways. Join me and my guest, Paul Dennison, creator of Grief Yoga. As we explore movement practices that go beyond calm, the nervous system, offering your clients an outlet to safely feel express and move through big emotions like anger towards empowerment.

Welcome to Yoga in the Therapy Room, the non-traditional therapist guide to Integrating Yoga into your therapy practice. I'm Chris McDonald, licensed therapist and registered yoga teacher. This podcast is here to empower therapists like you with the knowledge and confidence to bring yoga into their practice safely and ethically.

So whether you're here to expand your skills, enhance your self-care. Or both, you are in the right place. Join me on this journey to help you be one step closer to bringing Yoga into your therapy room.

It wasn't safe, but when anger goes unacknowledged, it doesn't just disappear. It often gets stored in the body In grief, anger can be especially complex. It might be aimed at a loved one who died at a situation that seems unfair or anger at oneself for not being able to prevent the loss. And many clients feel guilt or shame having these feelings, leaving their grief incomplete, and their bodies holding on to unresolved emotion.

Here to guide us on this journey. Today is one of my all time favorite yoga teachers, Paul Denniston. I was so fortunate last past spring to take his a hundred hour grief yoga teacher training and found it to be so transformative for my clients and for myself as well. I use it just about every day in my sessions.

In this episode we'll look at how yoga can be used as a therapeutic tool to help clients safely access. Express and release anger. We'll explore how somatic practices can gently guide the body towards empowerment. Offering a pathway back to one's voice, one's power, and the quiet strength that so often lies beneath their pain.

Let's discover how expressing anger can help lead to transformation. Welcome to the Yoga Therapy Room podcast, Paul.

Paul Denniston: Thank you. It's good to be here.

Chris McDonald: I should say welcome back 'cause you were in my holistic counseling podcast a while back in episode 1 22 on Grief Yoga.

Paul Denniston: Well, I'm grateful you wanted me to come back.

Chris McDonald: Of course. Can you share your journey on how you first discovered yoga?

And during that time I was also like looking around and comparing myself to other people and beating myself up and saying I wasn't good enough. Everything that actually was in my mind outside of the yoga room. What it allowed me to do was to be present within it there, and the teacher could see that I was struggling and the teacher came over to me and just whispered in my ear and she goes, you know, it's okay to rest whenever you need to.

And that dropped me to my niece and I had this powerful release within the class, uh, in child's pose. That was exactly what I was needing. But also to recognize her kindness really was something that I wasn't even offering to myself. I remember after that yoga class, I really came into a place of like, like peace, and I thought to myself, okay, I need more of this.

And then after my very first yoga teacher training, I had a traumatic fall and it literally knocked me down and I had broken. A part of my arm and it forced me to sit and to be with what is. And I found that I had been running and running for so long and I had spent decades with substance abuse, alcohol, drugs, and sex to numb the pain.

And so through my process then of recovery, I started to continually become a teacher and learning different forms of yoga, whether it was Vinyasa or Kundalini, or. Restorative yoga, laughter, yoga, chakra dance. But I really started to connect that I was kind of going to yoga to help me to deal with my own grief and loss.

How can we channel it in empowering ways so we can. Come to the other side of it, which is was, for me, it was a level of peace or purpose or gratitude, but there was an acknowledgement of like, let's not deny what's going on, but let's work with it from an embodied space.

Chris McDonald: Love hearing your story and taking your training.

It's just. Amazing. And I was wondering what led you to include expression to release some of the anger and

Paul Denniston: as I was developing the grief yoga practice, I certainly checked out other places that were dealing with grief, which were all very. Restorative, creating that safe container, which I think is very important.

But I found that there was an element missing just for myself personally. It's like I'm dealing with a lot of anger or hurt or guilt or rage or self-judgment, and I'm like, this needs to get addressed. This needs to, so I was traveling around with David Kessler as we would teach to therapists and counselors, and I would really tune to listening to.

And for some people the suppression could be anger suppression, could be laughter, suppression, could be anxiety. It's like whatever it is that we kind of. Push down or avoid or numb out. That's actually what if from an empowered space. We used that as fuel for healing and for transformation. So that was kind of my doorway into it

Chris McDonald: because what I found, I think I'm glad you mentioned about restorative and calming yoga.

Paul Denniston: It's a mixed bag. Yeah. I think that. Grief is a unique experience. We all feel it and it differently. I think that for some, going into the anger could actually be a very activating thing because perhaps for some people they were told, you know, Hey, you know, good girls aren't supposed to be angry. Or, for myself personally, I have, I, I came from a place where I, I was bullied as a kid and I kept it.

Fight back, and it was almost like the anger was driving and I, I wasn't in control of it. I think that anger is a human emotion that we all go through, and what it does is it teaches us when there is injustice. When we say enough activists, certainly use it as a place of use for positive change. But I also know that because it can be such a fiery emotion, it can be a little intimidating for people.

So the way that I handle it is as I first, from a safe restorative space, get them in a, in a safe place, empower them using some techniques that, that make them feel a little empowered and stronger. That then. They are able to channel and move the, the place of anger. And for some people also, I wanna say, they might not resonate with anger.

It's the protector part of ourself that needs to be expressed and to be released. And I, it can be activating. And for some people it's like all of this is invitational from a trauma-informed space. And it's like, if that doesn't feel right for you, that's okay. But sometimes the anger needs to. Be expressed.

Chris McDonald: Yeah. And I appreciate you saying the witnessing too, 'cause that's what I learned in your training. Can you talk more about what you mean by that? How it needs to be witnessed?

Paul Denniston: Yeah. I think that grief needs to be seen and grief needs to be witnessed. And many times we might want to, uh, hide away. In a shell, like a turtle.

Is challenging. Whatever the emotions are, suppressed emotions. Then there becomes a moment of connection, which starts with witnessing to witness. It can be through ourself, it can be witnessing within another, but it is a place where, you know, our grief is seen and witnessed. And I find that when, when we can create a space where that happens, it is.

Allowing us to begin, to begin to move forward. And so I I, I believe it's a big, it's an important part of the healing process.

Paul Denniston: and think about.

Whether grief or loss, it's a lot about disconnection. Disconnection,

Chris McDonald: yes.

Paul Denniston: From someone, from something that we loved. Um, maybe it's disconnected to a part of myself. Maybe it's disconnected to dreams that will, you know, never be, I thought like, my life is gonna be different. So there's some sort of a.

Disconnection that's happening within that space. And so what we're looking for is, is a place of connection and having it witnessed and literally what yoga means is yoga means union connection. And so that's what I believe is an important part of the. The grief process and to be seen and to be witnessed in that way.

This downloadable checklist includes best practices for integrating yoga plus reflection questions to help you refine your approach and. Feel empowered, empower. It's the perfect tool for anyone wanting to blend yoga into therapy in a safe and impactful way. Step into the therapy room with confidence and transform your sessions today.

Go to HC podcast.org/build confidence. That's HC podcast.org/build confidence. Can you share some of the. Practices that you have for expression. So I know a lot of listeners may not know what we're talking about as far as some of the ways that we release anger and some of these other difficult emotions.

So my arms are parallel in front of my chest and my fists are by opposite elbow. And I take a moment and connect to where I might be feeling stuck. If you're resenting someone or hurt, or any place where you're feeling just a little bit stuck in your life, to just take a moment and hold right there.

Pushing the elbows back. Okay. What's happening here? Well, there's first off a big chest expansion that's happening within that space too. But as we bring the elbows back, there's also a sense of empowerment in that way. Okay. Now that's called breaking the chains. And now another technique that you can do too is I call this.

The wood chopper. I actually learned this technique while traveling, and a therapist kind of showed this as an option and I thought it was a really wonderful thing. I, I called it the wood chopper, but it's, you just take a moment and you interlace your fingers together. Okay? And you imagine. That you are holding a very powerful divine ax.

Good. Again. Inhale up. Exhale. Good. I'm gonna do two more if you'd like to try it. Go ahead. Good. One more.

Good. Take a moment and shake it out a little bit here. So let me share with you a couple of things why this is helping. So first off, it's actually helping to, to deepen your breath. A lot of the times within grief, our breath can become very shallow. So this is technique that's also. Encouraging a lot of a deeper breath.

Chopping here and I, you could start to continue this for and do repetition with it for as long as you want. And for some, if you're working with clients, and that might be a little like too much for them, right? You could start slow. Like take for instance, this is a technique that can move into that. It's called energy burst, but you interlace your fingers together and then you inhale through the nose with the arms up.

Exhale, bring the arms down. You could start simply by that. Okay. And this is already just kind of bringing the movement in while it's deepening the breath. Good. And then you can bring them into the wood chopper and just take a moment and have them feel grounded. And then imagine there's a piece of wood right there.

So taking a moment to pause and connecting to resources that can support us is also very important. So the resources that you can always come back to are foundation. Take a moment and feel yourself grounded, your sit bones in your chair and your feet touching the earth. Come back to your brass or just your brass.

And another way you can have them ground them is even finding their center. Where is your center in your body? And some people are like, I have no idea. Some people find their center in their solar plexes, right in their core, and this can be a place where they can kind of ground them center themselves.

Through that we're in relationship with the anger and the frustration. It, it doesn't have control over us. We're, it's almost like I the dance of anger.

Chris McDonald: Yeah. And you do a grief dance too in the training. So, so could that work for anger too, to let it move through you in some way?

Paul Denniston: You know, uh, I'll show you another technique here.

Yeah. Some people, this is a light pillow, right? And maybe in your offices you have like a, just a very, or if they're, if you're working on Zoom, you can just ask 'em to grab a small pillow. Okay? So this is another way you can start to begin to move it through. Like, I'm gonna stand up right now and I'm just gonna take the pillow.

Then lift the pillow up and release it down. That's another way you can start to move it through and it kind of, kind of feels good to be able to kinda let it go in that way too.

Chris McDonald: I'm glad you shared that. That's my favorite one. I do too. I love that. You'll love this. So in my, uh, counseling space, I'm upstairs.

Paul Denniston: We're all good. We're letting go.

Chris McDonald: They're like, who are we renting this space to? What is she doing in there?

Paul Denniston: I had it where I was doing it.

In a hotel room and I was teaching online and I think one of the maids got really scared and like someone is trying to merge someone. Oh gosh. So I'm like, no, it's all good. It's, I saw

Chris McDonald: we're safe. Oh, love that. Oh, that's amazing. Oh,

Paul Denniston: what we have to do to just. That anger.

Chris McDonald: I know exactly. Oh,

Paul Denniston: uh, it feels good though.

I feel lighter. It's, it's amazing, doesn't it?

Chris McDonald: Even just doing the wood chopper. I know. I've been doing that more with client. I forgot too about the seeded wood chopper. That that's possible too. So I think that I love the accessibility that you offer too with grief yoga that we can do. A lot of these practices seeded.

Chris McDonald: So what cues can you tell therapists to consider, especially with clients who may be afraid of their anger or deeper emotions? Like if they're doing the pillow, is there a way to help them, encourage them?

Any kind of cues with yoga?

Paul Denniston: I think it's, uh. I think it's to witness where they're at and if there's a feeling of like nervousness and insecurity to, I think to, to validate that it's going back to the witnessing where they're at. You know, whether it's the grief or the insecurity, or, yeah, it can be a little, it can be a little scary.

Might actually get exactly where we're needing to, which is exactly to witness the grief. To witness the loss. That's, and for some people, they're like, I, they, they might be doing this. And they're like, oh no, I've got, I need to do this a lot more. So it's really just meeting them where they're at, creating that safe container, which is the, the key and, and small steps in this way to help them to, you know, feel, to feel safe that, and develop a relationship.

With the anger and the grief to create a dance with it in that way. A safe dance.

Chris McDonald: Yeah. Oh, it's so important. What about after? So if somebody does like the pillow throw, what should they consider after as far as getting them back to safety?

Paul Denniston: So having them just come back, coming back to the resources again, let's say.

Is there a place where, where you're feeling anything that's happening in your body, and if they wanted to, they could place even their hands there. Like, let's say I'm feeling a tension in my shoulders from it or anything, where is it connected to the body? One, one of the, the key things we're trying to do is to bring the awareness from the mind.

Into the body. There's so much wisdom in the body. So what, how is it impacting your body right now? Okay. And then you can encourage them to maybe just begin to tap their chest and to take a moment and to, do you wanna do this with me right now, Chris? Sure. As as an example of it. So I'll just say, tell you what Chris, let me, let me start, lemme just, lemme just guide you within.

And I'm gonna invite you to just say, I am, or I'm feeling. And if whatever that sensation could speak, the vulnerable part of that pain could speak. Just say, I am, or I'm feeling, and let it speak and I'm gonna repeat back. Whatever you say with you are,

Chris McDonald: I'm frustrated.

Paul Denniston: You're frustrated.

Chris McDonald: I feel helpless.

Paul Denniston: You feel helpless.

Chris McDonald: I feel infuriated.

Paul Denniston: You feel infuriated,

Chris McDonald: unsure what to do.

Paul Denniston: You feel unsure of what to do?

Chris McDonald: I feel hopeless.

Paul Denniston: You feel hopeless. Can we breathe for a moment?

Chris McDonald: Yes.

Paul Denniston: If there's anything else that that pain needs to say here. I invite you to say it here.

Chris McDonald: I feel grateful for being able to share this.

Can you place your hands back on your chest for a moment and breathe. I see you. I see your frustration. I see your hopelessness. I see your gratitude. Let's just breathe for a moment. I invite you to release that down.

Chris McDonald: Thank you so much.

Paul Denniston: Thank you for. Embodying vulnerability. Yeah. Thank you for showing what that's like.

And I came from a place where all I did was I was a mirror for you who allow the pain and the vulnerability to speak. And once you and I were able to do that, there is a place then where I guide where it's called connection, it's flowing meditations where it begins to. Open and expand the chest and the heart where we don't stay in the pain, but the pain starts to become transformed.

That's where we, that's the journey we move through. It's literally an embodiment journey, moving from darkness to.

Chris McDonald: It is, it's, it's a beautiful practice and be able to experience it myself. I think that that was what's so powerful with grief yoga, with the teacher training too, is I was able to experience it in my body before sharing it, which I think we need so much of as therapists to before we teach in embodiment practice, to be able to feel what it's like so that we have the skills to guide.

And have that knowledge too.

Chris McDonald: Yeah. I appreciate you sharing all those practices today. I think that's really gonna be helpful. And I think therapists listening to remember, you already have all these skills. It's just integrating 'em in a different way with when we integrate movement practices and embodiment practices.

Paul Denniston: You know, when I was, before I was became a yoga teacher and I was doing this work with therapists and counselors, I found it to be very powerful, but I was just like, there's an.

There's an element missing, which is the body part. And so I think that as I have seen where, where therapists are bringing that body part to it, it is creating bigger transformations and it's just going deeper and, and your clients might be a little intimidated at the beginning. But there's actually a space where they're grateful.

There's, there's, there's a shifting that's happening in that space that is, uh, really powerful that I encourage you as therapists to keep going in that direction.

And I was telling you before we hit record too, my one client who lost her husband recently said she was able to talk to her husband on the other side with her arms up in the air for those that can't see the video and be able to open that connection

Paul Denniston: up like a V at the,

Chris McDonald: like a V. Yeah.

Paul Denniston: Reaching up towards the sky, which in that space I.

Feel the sense of opening in the heart and the chest Absolutely. Opening in that space, which is very much where we're we're going. And so it feels, oh my gosh. It feels just good to do that.

Chris McDonald: I know. I see you putting your arms back. Yes. Opening up the heart space. And I think that's what you said too in the training was like opening up our heart space right.

Is so important through grief practices and that movement part is, is just so essential.

Where the more expansive chest and heart openings, grief bursts, love bursts, can really get the space to move through.

Chris McDonald: Yeah. So how has your relationship with anger changed with yoga practices like this?

Paul Denniston: I'm not scared of anger like I used to be, whether it be from myself or from others. I come from a more greater SP space of compassionate witnessing.

So I think it's, it's like really just like, it's like a friend in, in a weird way, which I never thought anger would be a friend. But it's my teacher, and there are times where it tells me like, you've gotta do some embodiment movement techniques to begin to channel and move it through. And so it's, it's just really developing a relationship with that part of myself and to not be afraid of it.

And to know that, that, that it is here to, um, support me and to protect me and to teach me. It's like there's the sense of like accepting all parts of ourself. The part of myself that's angry, the part of myself that is, that is sad or that is lonely. It's like all of these, and, and, and to find that space of like physical embodiment to support that, those connections, I think is, is what I've learned along the way.

Paul Denniston: Getting activated is part of the key here. You know, I say activated instead of triggered because I think that many people have lost their loved ones through a trigger.

And so I just wanna say for some people when we go into this. There can be this fear of like, I don't wanna, I don't wanna activate them or activate myself. And, and I just come from a place where I, I think it's unavoidable. I, I'm gonna like go out later today and I'm gonna be activated by someone, you know, honking their horn or I'm gonna be activated by whatever is happening.

I have a relationship, like it's just gonna happen. So how can I self-regulate or how can I. Channel and move it through to help me to, um, support my wellbeing.

Chris McDonald: No, I appreciate that. So what's the best way for listeners to find you to learn more about you?

Paul Denniston: Grief yoga.com. If you're curious about a practice, you can see right there on the top there's a, it's called Emotions Need Motion.

It's a free grief yoga class. You're welcome to, uh, check it out and experience it there.

Chris McDonald: And we'll have that in the show notes as well. He's got a lot of amazing trainings. Highly recommend checking out Paul's information and trainings, but this has been awesome. Thank you so much for coming on the podcast, Paul.

Paul Denniston: Chris, it's very inspiring to see the way that you expand and grow. And thank you for being part of the Grief Yoga family, and thank you for all the work that you're doing for all of the people out there listening. Thank you for all of the help and support. We need helpers and supporters out there at this time.

Chris McDonald: Thank you so much for joining us today for this powerful conversation on grief, anger, and the healing potential of yoga. I hope today's episode offered you new insight and inspiration for supporting your clients and maybe even yourself.

Moving through the fire of anger with compassion and care, as Paul reminded us, anger doesn't have to be feared or silence. When we give it space to breathe and a body to move through, it can become a bridge connecting pain to purpose and sorrow. To strength. If this episode helped inspire you to wanna bring more yoga practices into your therapy sessions, feel free to download my guide, how to build Confidence and Confidence with Yoga and Therapy Sessions, and start integrating these practices with clarity and ease.

Go to HC podcast.org/build confidence. That's HC podcast.org/. Build confidence is also in the show notes, and once again, this is Chris McDonald sending each one of you much light and love. Till next time, take care. Thanks for listening to today's episode. The information in this podcast is for general informational and educational purposes only.

It is given with the understanding that neither the host, the publisher, or the guests are giving legal, medical, psychological, or any other kind of professional advice. We are not responsible for any losses, damages, or liabilities. That may arise from the use of this podcast. Yoga is not recommended for everyone and is not safe under certain medical conditions.