On this episode we're joined by the incomparable Alasdair Stuart (co-owner of the Escape Artists podcast network) as we talk about 1992 cyberpunk buddy cop horror romance classic SPLIT SECOND!

To read the full transcript, go to https://rankandvile.captivate.fm/episode/episode-169-bad-times-in-ratwater-city

Transcript:

Ryan 0:36

Hey guys, welcome to rank and vile, the podcast where we're ranking every single horror movie ever made from best to worst. And On this episode, we are joined by co owner of Escape Artist Podcasts, and all around wonderful human being Alasdair Stuart.

Alasdair 0:51

Oh, you, thank you so much for having me on. Ryan. This is brilliant.

Ryan 0:55

Oh my God, I've wanted to have you on the show for such a long time because of how frequently we talk about horror movies. Like it just I feel like every time we talk it always ends up with horror movies. So this was this was always going to happen.

Alasdair 1:10

And what and what better movie to land on?

Ryan 1:13

no, no shit. Oh my god, like watching this movie. By the way. My, my partner, Christina sort of, like, craned her neck over while I was watching. It was just like what the fuck is this, and then a beat afterward is that Rutger Hauer? So it? Yeah, it's extremely good. So Alasdair, we have a question that we like to ask guests who are on the show for the first time is what is your background with horror? Like how did you how did you get into horror like what was your What was your horror onboarding process, like?

Alasdair 1:43

My horror onboarding process was hilarious, because it was basically two decades of denial, followed by a realization that I actually work in the field. Growing up, I was always like, No, I'm a spaceship kid. I like spaceships. I'm into Doctor Who. And the Star Wars and spaceships that go boom, and all of this good stuff. And the whole time this was going on. I was I was about 5'11" by the time I was 12, my voice broke by the time I was 13. So I was plausibly getting into 15 year old movies, which my mom was giving me a lift to, by the time I was 13, or 14. And also I was able to rent 15 or 18 movies. For us listeners, the English movie certification processes U, PG, 12A, which now means a lot of cases, a single fbomb, 15 and 18. And I was growing up at a time when 18 meant hold on to your intestines, because something else is going to be as well.

Ryan 2:42

Yeah, this is gonna be the good uncut shit if it's if it's 18

Alasdair 2:45

Absolutely. So you know, I was coming up at the exact right time for stuff like Aliens and Terminator, and all those horror movies disguised as science fiction films. So those were kind of really pivotal texts for me. And then as time went on, I realized that you know, there were a couple of really important radio shows to me, fear on four, which is the BBC's postmodern undying horror narrator who just emerges from the depths of broadcasting house once a decade or so. Hello, I have a story for you. It's about

Ryan 3:23

You just blow the dust off. Every time he comes, he pops out and they put it back in the box.

Alasdair 3:26

Exactly. And he's like Doctor Who's goth older brother, you know, we never actually see regenerate. He's just suddenly there. And I really, really loved that. And I was when I found comics, the first thing I dived into was hellblazer. And then a couple years ago, I realized that the longest job I've held the longest in my entire life is hosting a horror podcast. So someone actually went so you're a horror guy now and I think I always was

Ryan 3:53

So and that's the thing is like, you sort of look up and then you know, it's it's like when you move to a city and you're like, oh, I've just moved here. And then someone mentions like, pal, you've lived here for 12 years, and you're like, Oh, shit, I can say I guess I'm, I guess I'm a native now?

Alasdair 4:06

I speak the language. And it was it always Latin, you know?

Ryan 4:09

Yeah, exactly. Well, and honestly, hellblazer is such a good place to start. Because like, that was I was never a big comic kid. But that was always the one that I wanted to read because it looked sort of, you know, adult and a little forbidden. And you've got like a mean protagonist in a cool coat, which was, you know, very important for me as a kid.

Alasdair 4:24

Oh, God. Absolutely. Right. Yeah. And the thing about hellblazer was that it was often not subtle. But when it was subtle, it was better. The very first issue I remember reading, there's a scene where John goes for lunch in a park with a friend of his, and he's talking about the fact that he's ill and whether her boss can do anything about it. And it's pretty clear that there are supernatural overtones to all of this. And the last panel of the scene is his friend Ellie, looking at him over the top of her coffee mug, and her eyes are just horrifyingly distended and alien and she smiles entirely too wide her mouth going, Don't worry, john, there's a space for you down there and you're like, [gasp]

Ryan 5:04

Oh, that's Jesus. Yeah, honestly, by the way with the rating system, I realized that like, my entire understanding of the rating system in Britain is like the the video nasties of the 1980s. Like, it was such a like, I feel like whenever we talk about sort of like transgressive movies or like sort of bad 80s B movies like there are I think like four different documentaries about the video nasty phenomenon in the 1980s on like Shudder. It seems like Britain was having a moment with with media and trying to figure out where the goalposts were

Alasdair 5:38

That that about once a decade, this country decides to have a very serious moral panic about something. And unfortunately, this decade is looking like the are trans rights human rights, to which the obvious answer is, fuck you.

Ryan 5:51

Yeah.

Alasdair 5:52

But in the 80s and 90s, it was oh, but should our kids have to watch these movies? And the answer is that if your kid looks like they can pass for 18, yeah, they will. And it's how can I put this. I was never, the way that I've described it is a lot of the horror movies I saw damaged me in a good way. They introduced me to narrative forms I wouldn't have understood before they assisted in my cultural and emotional education. And you could say the same thing a decade later with video games. There is this there's a comic writer who's sing-- who had the single perfect aphorism. And it was the best way to get kids to want to see or read something is tell them they can't.

Ryan 6:35

Yeah, exactly like that. That was exactly how I got started with horror,

Alasdair 6:39

Right? You look at this stuff, and you go, Oh, that's about three hours past bedtime? Well, obviously I'm setting the tape for

Ryan 6:45

Yeah, well, and honestly, this is the thing that I worry about is that and yeah, sort of damaged in a good way. Like the kids right now and concerned that like, where are they getting? You know, their the material that's going to like scar them for life and get them into horror. Get them into that like wonderful little forbidden feeling of like, I am watching something I definitely should not be watching. Like, they have, you know, access to any movie they could possibly want to watch anytime they want to watch it. And I'm wondering what they're doing with that.

Alasdair 7:12

I choose to believe it's the Tiktoks.

Ryan 7:15

Yeah, definitely

Alasdair 7:16

Find it on the Tiktoks. That's that's obviously that's a conversation for another time. But Tik Tok is doing incredibly interesting narrative stuff, which, clearly the Chinese intelligence agencies who designed it to steal facial recognition data, never for a second thought it would.

Ryan 7:33

Yeah, honestly, a tik tok I feel like it's doing fun stuff with surrealism that this was always going to happen. I think with like, sort of weird internet humor. So yeah, I believe I believe the children are the future. Let's let's dive into the goddamn the movie we're talking about this week. This movie is utterly singular, and yet made. It's Frankensteined together from basically every other movie from around the country. We are doing a Split Second from 1992 which is a cyber horror. thriller.

Alasdair 8:08

It's a cyber horror thriller, cyberpunk mismatched cop movie.

Ryan 8:13

Yeah, yeah. And it's which I feel like everything they're going if it can be a buddy cop, action comedy, it will be a buddy cop action comedy. And this movie, it's starring Rutger Hauer which this this weirds me out. He plays a good guy in a movie? I'm I'm uncomfortable with this somehow.

Alasdair 8:34

No, this is wrong. This is just wrong.

Ryan 8:37

Like he's got such unwholesome vibes on the screen that like seeing him and, and his character is sort of a straight ahead like Bruce Willis, cynical cop whose partner died

Alasdair 8:48

because Willis always had that kind of, even now has that kind of slightly romanticized sleaze to him. And you look at Harley and think if I touched you, you'd be sticky.

Ryan 8:58

Yeah, yeah, there's a film on him. Right? Like his. His name is Harley Stone, which is just an outstanding name for any cyberpunk cop. He, he looks dead on like a shadowrun character.

Alasdair 9:14

Like yeah with the boots and the trench coat and

Ryan 9:18

The little sunglasses like he, yeah, yeah. And like, you know, we get the opening of the movie and it's him sort of like striding down a hallway with a shotgun over his shoulder and he's got the cool sunglasses. And then the movie's like also he's a cop, I guess?

Alasdair 9:35

Also, that first shot and they they do the Rutger walks purposefully down the corridor in the precinct, like three or four times thing. If you notice every single time I choose to believe this was written into his contract. A female cop stops and goes, HelLO

Ryan 9:54

Yeah, that's definitely in the mix. Like, like the narrative needs to inform us. Yes, this man is very attractive. As many takes place in the it's like 15 minutes into the future. It's like global warming, as we used to call it has filled London with water and rats? It's it's never they never really I feel like they never really go back to what is going on with the global warming and the rats.

Alasdair 10:23

The thing I loved more than anything else when I rewatched this yesterday, we're seeing that big portentous openings opening crawl within London The city is now largely underwater, and the criminals have gone feral. And then there's just stock footage. Nothing yet nothing at all is flooded. Apart from the two soundstages which all the sets are on where everyone has to splash throught ankle deep water the whole time. And the rest of London there's a chase sequence at one point and they drive around some pools and it's pristine. There are buses.

Ryan 10:58

Yeah, there's there's no I maybe they didn't have the budget to flood London for the for the filming of this motion picture. I mean, it's it's wild. It's wild also because like I feel like during this period, intros to movies loved doing the the news footage intro where it's flitting from headline to headline to like, get you up to speed with where everything's on?

Alasdair 11:19

Yes. Oh, yeah, absolutely.

Ryan 11:21

And it's, it's so what's incredible. So we get this big bar scene now. I've realized that as a kid, I think I assumed that in my adult life, there would be more sort of scary bars with people dancing around in bondage gear, possibly there'll be fire. There's industrial music, like, have you you've seen Hellraiser three right?

Alasdair 11:43

Oh, many times

Ryan 11:44

Yeah, the club from Hellraiser Three. That's like somehow a combination restaurant bondage bar and music venue?

Alasdair 11:52

When you get this sneaking suspicion, there's a there's like a fight bill up. So should I open cage fight night? Tuesdays that kind of thing?

Ryan 12:00

Yeah, exactly. That now that's probably also what's weird to me, is that so everything is meant to be submerged in water. But also everything is just constantly smoking in this movie. Just it looks like the entire city is gonna explode. Like there's just so much smoke rising up. I don't. It's I don't know if that was a choice so much as the movie going? Well, it's a cyberpunk horror thriller. So yes, we will have smoke.

Alasdair 12:26

This is something I'm sure we're gonna come on to. But I mean, this this thing, there's a lot of things very, very wrong. But as you pointed out, when we were talking about this earlier, it looks a million quid. I mean, probably not much more than that. And, you know, it's maybe borrowed some stuff from its mom, but it actually looks really good. A lot of the time in how it's shot.

Ryan 12:46

It really does. Like, it looks so much better than I think it has any right to honestly

Alasdair 12:51

Oh, god yes.

Ryan 12:53

Like, like, especially like, this is like a big set full of like, all manner of now I love the people in the background who sort of look like the thugs from a Frank Miller comic.

Alasdair 13:06

Yes!

Ryan 13:07

Where they all just have these little nasty sunglasses and goofy haircuts. And it's like, during that period when nobody quite knew what punk rock was on like a Hollywood level, but they they figured they had an approximation of it. So Harley goes to this bar, and what we find out is that his partner was killed by a serial killer?

Alasdair 13:27

Mm hmm.

Ryan 13:28

Is it ever explained like that? We never found the serial killer and he's sort of scarred by the experience. And apparently, this serial killer's MO is to just rip people's hearts out of their chests.

Alasdair 13:42

Yeah, just it this this particular killer is is a lot. There is zero chill here. Things are ripped out things are bitten. You know, there's, there's running it's a whole the whole thing.

Ryan 13:56

Yeah. Although I appreciate the killer's branding that he's like, very consistent with like, I'm the I'm the rips I'm the rip out hearts hearts guy. Like that's what I do. I have to it makes me think of this killer must have done the thing that Keith Moon once did where they got in the car to the to go to the airport. And then he's like, wait, no, we have to go back to the hotel. I almost forgot. And then he like goes back in, throws the TV out the window, and then goes back down to get in the car to go to the hotel. Like this is I assume the killer in Split Second was like Oh shit, I forgot to rip the heart out. He had to go back and do it.

Alasdair 14:29

Sorry, sorry. Okay, we can go now

Ryan 14:33

I'm just gonna sneak past her. rip out heart real quick. Okay, thank you so much. Now, what I also love is that Ian Dury of Ian Dury and the Blockheads is sort of the bar manager for this place.

Alasdair 14:43

Yes. And he because he's he Ian Dury. There is no acting. It is literally Ian Dury is Ian Dury in Split Second.

Ryan 14:52

Yeah, yeah. Like he's one of those people that like he I honestly I have a thing. I think he has the only authentic cockney accent and everybody else's putting it on

Alasdair 15:01

All others copied from him. there's a there's an exam clearly.

Ryan 15:04

Exactly. He honestly his his screen presence his I love his voice so much it's just this raspy nasty little deep voice he's he's a he's a treat anytime he's on screen and so there's a woman at the bar who's like I there's like a weird flirting thing with with Harley where she's like, Hey, I'm going to go into the bathroom Can you can you watch out for me and he's like what? Yeah, she's like alright, Don't sneak into the bathroom to watch me and he's like, will do like he's so uncomfortable with this interaction. And she she in very short order, she gets murked and dies and

Alasdair 15:43

And dies a lot It must be said

Ryan 15:45

She dies so much like that. But now this movie has I assume the budget was for two things. It was for neon lights. And the other one was blood.

Alasdair 15:53

Yeah. Oh, yeah.

Ryan 15:55

Like it is just everything is soaked in blood in this movie. And she so she screams to let everybody know that. You know, there's like something hinky is going on and they run in there she's dead. And also there is scrawled on the wall in in blood "I'm back" which means that the killer had enough time to both rip her heart out. Scrawl that on the wall and skip town before anybody else could could make it into the room.

Alasdair 16:19

Oh, yeah, yeah. Yeah, we that I have theories about a lot of the things missing from this film, which as we get on will I'm sure we'll discuss but this this whole the killer is an invisible eight Foot Ninja element does become much more important as time goes on.

Ryan 16:37

Yeah, yeah, it does the well what it does is the alien thing of you never totally see what the monster looks like until the the third act.

Alasdair 16:46

Yeah. And the third act which it turns out was shot by someone other than the original director.

Ryan 16:53

Wait No shit, what happened there?

Alasdair 16:55

Massive amounts of stress basically. The the original director basically two thirds in just went, I can't do this. And they parachuted someone else in. And Stephen Norrington who would go on to be the man who retired Sean Connery from movies if I remember correctly.

Ryan 17:16

Wow.

Alasdair 17:16

Designed the creature.

Ryan 17:18

I mean, it's a it's a it's a good design.

Alasdair 17:20

It is

Ryan 17:21

It? It's like primarily teeth based like this thing. It's it sort of looks like venom. If venom did had more teeth instead of eyes.

Alasdair 17:30

That's a really good description of it. Yeah, it's a little bit kind of deep sea fish as well.

Ryan 17:36

Yeah, yeah. There's something Yeah, like just that jutting. Scary tooth jaw. Honestly, I think I wish more directors were able to do what the first director did actually to just go You know what, I'm having a bad time. Friends. I need to, I need to, I need to end this collab. We need to get someone else...