Since Covid, something has happened in how we communicate with each other. Worship, Bible Study, school and many other activities, became a virtual presence. We could not engage in cultural things with each other. How we shared the truth of forgiveness, hope, and grace had to become very formal. We lost "informal communication". Join us as we hear from Rev. Dan Potts about becoming intentional again about informal language--such as potlucks, meeting on the children's playground, playing dart ball, and bowling together--that is just being together again. Pastor John Cain hosts.

The following program is sponsored by evangelical life ministries.

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And welcome to another edition of engaging truth. I'm your host pastor John Kane with us today. We've got the Reverend Dr. Daniel. Patsy's the senior pastor at Trinity Lutheran church in Roe, Michigan. And he's gonna tell us something about communication. Welcome to the program, Dan.

Well, thank you for having me, John. I appreciate being on.

So I understand that you were a presenter at a recent conference and you were talking about, uh, communication and a little bit about COVID. Something happened during COVID to our communication. Do you wanna fill us in on that?

Yeah. Um, for anyone who's been engaged in almost any kind of organization during, uh, the COVID 19 crisis, the pandemic we noticed there was a major shift in how we talked with one another. Um, especially I know John, you are down in, uh, Texas. And so I know Texas had a different approach than us up in Michigan. Um, and so, but for all of us, it looked different. There were periods where we couldn't gather together where we couldn't do quote unquote, the normal, um, and that really changed way. We had to talk with each other for churches. I'm blessed that I get to serve at a church and we also have a day school, a K through eight elementary school. And, um, that really changed the way instruction happened in the classroom. The way worship happened on a weekend, the way Bible studies, the way social events, every thing changed simply because needing to be distanced or, or just those concerns on being too close to one another.

And that impacts the way we talk with each other. It impacts the way we communicate with one another. So there was a major shift in churches with, for some churches, they already had a fairly robust online presence or, um, virtual presence, some on social media, some on websites, some on various other avenues. Um, as we're on the radio today, some churches really leveraged, um, connecting with local broadcast stations and picking up low goal bandwidth or, um, signal with that they could broadcast their station. That was pretty neat to talk with some who were able to set it up to broadcast their service into the parking lot so that people could be in the cars and listen and engage in worship. But those all impact the way you're used to communicating in a church where you're used to gathering together and rubbing elbows with each other, coming together for community events.

Um, we're a Lutheran church. Part of our history is gathering together around potlucks and who can bring what grandma Schmitz, famous, whatever. Uh, and so to not be able to engage in those social things impacts again, the way we communicate. And so there was a major shift trying to go to online and virtual, where we had to work really hard at how do we get information to people and how do we get those gifts that come to us in worship, hearing God's words, celebrating in the proclamation of forgiveness and life and salvation that we have. How do we share those with God's people, especially at a time when they're scared, when they're fearful, when they're worried, maybe even when they're angry and upset, how do we communicate that truth with people? So a lot of pastors, a lot of churches had to figure it out.

What were those formal ways of communication that they utilized? And like I had mentioned websites and streaming, uh, phone calls, radio broadcasts, uh, mailing, um, you know, the old school let's print out everything, put it in an envelope and mail it to the neighborhood. Um, and lots of churches and lots of schools got really, really good at it. Professional level quality, not necessarily, but they figured out how to do it. And they got to where they were confident in doing it, which is a really amazing thing. And it's a really, I know a lot of people like to bemoan the fact that things have changed in churches pretty dramatically over the last few years, but the events of the last few years have forced the church to engage in an online presence that maybe we hadn't been doing previously. Um, so it's, there, there are those glistening nuggets in seeing, whereas God brought blessing through things we didn't expect, but getting really good at that stuff meant we also lost something during COVID.

This is something that many of us are aware of, but maybe we won't articulate extremely well. And I'm gonna call it the informal communication when you think informal communication, think, um, Hey, the guy I'm sitting next to that, I'm just kinda chuckling with as we're it's before worship and we're just catching up. Hey, how was your family this week? How was work? Hey, I, I know you mentioned you had this big project going on. How'd that go? Uh, just the shooting, the breeze informal thing. When you look at, um, an elementary school, which is again, part of the ministry that I gotta do, the gathering together of parents, as they wait to pick up their kids, or as they're coming in the halls to drop off their kids, just checking in with one another, seeing how little Susie little Johnny are doing those informal things we lost.

And so the research showed that the lack of the informal aspects of communication, really dampened really complicated, the formal communication. Let me explain that a little bit differently to maybe help kind of clarify, but we got really good at getting information out, all the different avenues, all the different ways, learning the new skills, which is a great thing, but we lost the aspect that gives all that information. Meaning because we can gather together, we can hear, we can hear the proclamation of the word, and that's a good thing, but when we're not in fellowship with one another, we lose sight of being a part of the body of Christ. We lose sight of that intimacy of God, coming to us in a way we can touch the way we can taste the way we can feel. But we also lose sight of when the church is talking about here, we have this mission opportunity, or we have this building project, or we have this meeting to determine what color paint we're gonna paint stuff, things that are not always all that exciting, but we've lost the informal things.

So we've shared this. Meeting's gonna be on Monday at six o'clock, but there's no relationship among one another that anyone cares anymore. And how do you bring it up? How do you talk about it? One of the things the research showed was that the informal communication happened in those times that we did didn't expect it to what do I mean by that? Hey, when we gather together for worship and people are kind of milling about in the NEX or talking outside in the parking lot as they come in or sitting next to each other in the pews, talking with the people around them or moving their chairs so they can kind of get to sit next to the people they want to sit next to or things like that. That's when all of those connections with one another happen. And that's also where the meaning is given to the bigger informational communication pieces. Hey, did you hear about the meeting that's coming up? Hey, what do you think about the different colors? Hey, are you gonna go to the potluck? Hey, do your kids need help getting to the field trip, all of those different information things we're good at getting the information out, but we've lost the opportunity to give meaning to the information that's shared.

So would you say this informal aspect is the granting of permission or it's the coming together of, of hearts and friendship or it's, uh, relationship in such a way that you, you care about the information that will ultimately be shared? Um, formally

Very much so the, I like how you said it, that you care about the information, um, because even, even information that's not necessarily connected to relationships. Again, let's go back to the example of we're having a meeting about picking the color of paint. Not that exciting if, if paint excites you, um, I have a lot of meetings you could go to in my place. I'll leave that to you. Um, but those meetings aren't necessarily something that a lot of people care passionately about, but it it's when people are vested in it together. Hey, what do you think about the color of paint? I really, I really think we should do this because it just makes it feel more open or more welcoming or again, we're talking paint, not that exciting, but now I've associated people's opinions with it and I've engaged with, it's not someone thought this would be good, but it's John thought this would be good. And John's someone I care about. So it, it is the relational aspect that I think we all missed dramatically. So during COVID, but realizing that the relational side impacts the way we talk and the way we hear information as well.

I was just thinking about a, um, the fact that I haven't been to high school in a lot of years, but we have a son who's a high schooler and he comes home and he will use language, um, that we used to call jive talk. But, uh, he knows what the meaning is. And I have frankly, no idea. So, uh, maybe it's some at the same in churches when we've been apart a little bit, we start, uh, drifting apart. And, uh, so, so how does a church, which is a community of people, perhaps of many different generations, um, maybe even different ethnicities, different backgrounds, different, uh, experiences. How do we use this information that you're sharing with us and rebuild?

So one of the things, and for some of the listeners, this may seem just to foregone conclusion, you may already be thinking this. And actually my prayer is that for most people, this is something you're already thinking about, but we have to become intentional about the informal communication, which seems like a weird thing for something that's informal. How do you intentionally do it? It's by intentionally setting up those opportunity for people to get for people, to get together for people to spend time with one another. It's something where we, we get really good, especially, uh, Trinity, as a part of the Lutheran church, Missouri Senate, and in our church body, we get really good about being in intentional about the language we use, the, the words we use, because it communicates different theological concepts or, or understandings. And sometimes we overshadow the fact that we have to be very intentional about it's okay to also just like being together to just spend time together.

and especially during this pandemic, during COVID, we allowed the intentionality of everything we did to be, how do we formally communicate? How do we formally get information across? And we don't wanna lose those things, but now we need to shift to say, how do we intentionally reconnect at everybody? How do we intentionally give opportunity for informal? So what does that look like? Um, there are millions upon millions of different ways to do that and your different congregations, your different families, your different communities would all engage in it differently. Um, but one of the things, again, we have the elementary school, so we have a, we have a playground and we actually just redid the playground this past summer. So having intentional time of just saying, Hey, me and my family, we're gonna meet at the playground on Saturday at two. Any of you wanna come, we'll be there.

Love to see you. That's it. There's no BA and switch there's no, Hey, we're this playing on. The playground is gonna turn into a Bible study. We're gonna do monkey bars and Bibles together, or, Hey, we're gonna turn this into a prayer, walk around the neighborhood. Those are all great things. I'm, I'm not dismissing those, but we also need the chance to just have fun. Just enjoy each other. Hey, you got a group of people that want to start playing. Let's see my, my home congregation, my dad's church, they decided let's start playing dart ball again, which was something kind of back in the day and is, is trying to make a resurgence. And they're just getting together to do it. Not, not to do anything else except have fun together. Um, that aspect of enjoying each other has to be intentional when we gather together for worship.

Yes, there is the aspect of reverence for God and recognizing Ren God's holy presence, but there's also the side of God called us to be his holy people, his children, his family. So it's okay to talk to one another. It's okay to laugh together. It's okay to celebrate that. God's brought you and me together in this place. May maybe it's talking about the game up here in Michigan. We NCAA basketball tournament. We've had both university of Michigan and Michigan state. So when you get together on Saturday for worship Saturday night, talk about how the game went that day. Talk about, you know, how the opening round of the tournament went. Not to fight, not to argue, but just cuz you're connecting. Maybe you're commiserating, maybe you're celebrating it. It doesn't matter the direction, but intentionally giving that opportunity that at worship, you have those spots where you come together and it's not just all right, the opening hem has started. So now we will do that. And once the postlude comes in at the end, now we leave. That's great. We receive God's gifts in and through those things. That's fantastic. But did I ever talk to anyone else in the family? Did I ever spend time with anyone else in the family? That's those are those aspects of needing to intentionally incorporate informal communication.

So we're talking about setting aside time and intentionally programming, social time that does not have other, you know, greater expectations of like you said, doing a prayer walk or doing some other thing other than to spend quality time and con conversation with each other. Yep. So give us some other ideas. What, um, what other solutions do you have or tips might there be for better quality of communication?

I think one side is those intentional social times to put aside for those of us who have been connected to again, the LCMS Luther church, Missouri Senate, there's something that you hear. Some of the older members articulate, you know, back when I was a kid, we had this thing called Walter league and when people bring it up, they tend to date themselves. Uh, but they know it. They know they're doing that but when you wanna say what was so great about it, it wasn't that the church had this thing, but it was that the church was intentionally saying, let's get people together for these different events, for dances, for dinners, for bowling, for whatever. Um, you've also seen some schools who have intentionally grabbed onto this where, you know, morning drop off time or pick up in the afternoon that they do something like dad and donuts.

So Hey, you drop off your little kid and you come grab a donut and a coffee and shoot the breeze with the other dads for five or 10 minutes. And then you head off to work or you head back home or wherever it is you're moving to. So some of the things we used to do I'm again, when I say used to, I don't mean two and three years ago, I mean 40 50 years ago, not that that's the ideal church, but that it was the community center. It was the place of life and living together. Some of those things would be great to intentionally reincorporate. What I love is when you look at, um, our confessions and our church body, one of the things that gets noted when it's talking about the gospel is that it comes to us in through God's word, through his gifts, his sacraments of baptism and the Lord's supper through confession, Absolut.

And then it has this awesome, awesome statement of through the mutual consolation and conversation of the brethren. So even that engaging in conversation together with one another with fellow believers is an opportunity for the gospel is an opportunity for us to revel and celebrate in God's loving grace and mercy. Again, it's not a sermon, it's not proclamation, it's just living in that gift, living in that grace. So John, I could list off a million different ways. You could do this in your church, in your community. Um, each community looks different, um, and some communities are just the community makeup. They're just better at this. Anyway. Um, there are certain you had mentioned early on if, you know, if church who has all these different ethnic groups who are a part of it and all these different ages are a part of it, different ethnic groups, their cultural identity is really, really prone to let's just get together for everything from birthdays and parties and funerals to, you know what, it's a Tuesday let's get together, let's have everybody over. Um, and those are great things. And I, I think the intentionality needs to be looking at some of those opportunities more,

Very good. Well, uh, pastor Potts were talking about churches taking a lead, I think in, uh, leading people back to safe community. And I've heard, uh, many people say that, you know, community is something that, uh, we were losing long before COVID, uh, people were, were getting into their own little cave and staying there and, uh, you know, with loneliness and, uh, uh, problems along those lines, hurting people, I think churches were on the forefront of that and were, uh, on the forefront once again of, uh, hosting community, uh, within our church walls. So we look forward to that. Is there a way for our listeners to, uh, contact you perhaps get more information?

Yes. Uh, again, I serve at Trinity Lutheran church in school in Monroe, Michigan, and you can find us, our website is T L c.org. Or you can email me at D as in Daniel pots, P OTTs, Trinity Lutheran, monroe.org. It's a terrible URL. It was set up before I got there, but it's easy enough to remember. It just takes a while to type out

Very good for our listeners. We'd also like to invite you not only to, uh, pastor Pott's website, but to visit our radio station, uh, at, um, E LM, houston.org. And they're at Elm houston.org. You can find this radio programs website, you can find podcasts of many of our past programs. You can also find links to our YouTube Facebook, Twitter accounts. You can read more about us and you can also support us all of your on the air hosts or volunteers. And, uh, we have a 5 0 1 [inaudible] [inaudible] designation from the IRS. So you can be sure that your donations go far in helping a us provide radio airtime. And, uh, we hope interesting guests. We hope, uh, that you enjoy listing people like, uh, pastor pots and, uh, here what people are doing creatively to advance the gospel of Jesus Christ because, uh, Christians, pastors, people con in the world are making a great difference in so many fronts to, uh, return to good communication and return to, uh, good community. So we hope that, uh, you'll check us out there. Pastor Potts will come back to you to, for a final word. We've got about two minutes. So what would be one tip you about communication? What would be one tip that, uh, I think every person or every family could start with.

Hmm. One tip. That's hard to narrow it down from, from all of them. Um, one tip would be the side of We've used these elements of technology to great, to great lengths. Um, and they're fantastic. I am very thankful we have these, but you can also put 'em down. You can also enjoy looking at each other eye to eye and talking with your kids at home around the dinner table, seeing what's going on with life with the other congregation members, with people in the parking lot at school pickup, look at people, talk with them, see their face, see their smile and share yours with them too. So that those relationships have a point of starting.

Very good. Thanks for those tips. And, uh, we ask God's blessings on your work up in Michigan, and we tell our listeners wherever you are. We hope that you find some time to engage with, uh, people next to you and there thereby the kingdom of Christ will grow in your midst. Join us again real soon for engaging truth. Goodbye.

Thank you for listening to this broadcast of engaging truth. Be sure to join us each week at this time to help support our ministry, contact evangelical life ministries, post office box 5 6 8, Cypress Texas 7 7 4 1 0. Or visit our website@elmhouston.org, or find us on Facebook at evangelical life ministries. Thank you.