Artwork for podcast Lift As You Climb
Jennifer Arthurton Old Chicks Know Shit | LAYC67
Episode 678th March 2023 • Lift As You Climb • Isabel Alexander
00:00:00 00:32:39

Share Episode

Shownotes

My guest today is helping many Baby Boomer and Generation X women redefine their roles and priorities by leveraging her podcast, Old Chicks Know Sh*t.

Her wisdom and the wisdom of her guests is relevant, insightful, and encouraging to all ages.

More about:

Jennifer Arthurton is the founder and creator of Old Chicks Know Sh*t, a community and a podcast designed to inspire and support midlife women in chasing their dreams and creating their kick ass next chapter. 

Jennifer is midlife mentor, podcast host, writer and speaker. Having made her own midlife course corrections, she has a passion for helping other women uncover the inherent power and wisdom of a time of life when they often feel overlooked and doubt themselves most. Jennifer regularly appears as a guest on blogs and podcasts and as a speaker at women’s events. 

Check out The Old Chicks Know Shit Podcast!

https://podcasts.apple.com/ca/podcast/old-chicks-know-sh-t-podcast/id1461186926

A few of my favorite shows from Old Chicks Know Shit:

https://oldchicksknow.podbean.com/e/following-your-heart-to-passion-and-purpose/

Which inspired me to interview Genevieve Piturro on this podcast. Episode 60:

https://lift-as-you-climb.captivate.fm/episode/genevieve-piturro-purpose-passion-pajamas-laycxx

Sincere apologies to Dr Susan Corso who is an expert on the Chakra system for drawing a blank on her name  - BUT – l truly loved her insights and the show is a valuable listen!

ttps://oldchicksknow.podbean.com/e/a-practical-guide-to-the-chakra-system-for-your-best-life/

More ways to connect with Jennifer Arthurton:

Visit her website and get your copy of:

5 Ways to Get Unstuck and Create Your Kick Ass Next Chapter

https://www.oldchicksknowshit.com/

https://www.linkedin.com/in/jennifer-arthurton-546566/

https://www.instagram.com/oldchicksknowshit/ 

https://www.facebook.com/oldchicksknowshit

About the Host:

 

Isabel Alexander

Your Next Business Strategist and Transformation Catalyst

 

Dynamic, a self-made entrepreneur who overcame obstacles with an unrelenting positive nature, a farm girl work ethic, and a conscious choice to thrive rather than survive, Isabel Alexander cultivated an award-winning, $10+ million global chemical business and grew it from dining room table to international boardrooms.

Isabel’s strengths include the ability to initiate and nurture strategic relationships, a love of lifelong learning and talents for helping others maximize their potential. An inspiring speaker within both industry and community, she is a driving force behind those with the courage to follow her example of thriving against the odds.

With 50+ years of business experience across diverse industries, Isabel is respected as an advisor, a coach, a mentor, and a role model. She believes in sharing collective wisdom and empowering others to economic independence.

 

Founder:

Lift As You Climb Movement (www.facebook.com/groups/liftasyouclimbmovement)

and

Chief Encore Officer, The Encore Catalyst (www.theencorecatalyst.com) – an accelerator for feminine wisdom, influence, and impact.

also

Author & Speaker ‘Who Am I Now? – Feminine Wisdom Unmasked Uncensored’ (www.IsabelBanerjee.com)

LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/isabelalexanderbanerjee/

 

Thank You for Listening!

It means so much that you listened to this podcast! If you know of anyone else who might find this show valuable or entertaining, please share it on your favorite social media platform.

If you have questions about this episode, please send me an email at Hello@TheEncoreCatalyst.com

 

Subscribe to the Podcast

Receive automatic notifications when new podcast episodes are made available.

Subscribe on your favorite podcast app to keep up with the latest episodes. Links on the sidebar make it easy. Please share if you value the content.

 

Leave a Review

Every bit of feedback offered helps to make this a value-packed part of your week and suggestions are welcome.  

Ratings and reviews from listeners are used to improve the podcast. They also help others find this series in their podcast platform, so reviews are very much appreciated!

Transcripts

Speaker:

​ Isabel: Hello everyone and Oh My!...

Speaker:

Aren't we going to start this week off with a fabulous conversation?

Speaker:

We're going to have some fun.

Speaker:

It's going to be exciting and we're going to learn stuff because my guest today,

Speaker:

and I know that Old Chicks Know Shit.

Speaker:

Welcome my guest and I hope future BFF Jennifer Arthurton of the

Speaker:

Old Chicks Know Shit podcast.

Speaker:

I accidentally discovered Jennifer on the airways, and I immediately

Speaker:

wanted to follow along because she was talking about things that really

Speaker:

related to what I was going through in my life, and I have been in the decade

Speaker:

before, and I will be going forward.

Speaker:

And boy, how valuable is it to have a tribe of other women sharing their wisdom?

Speaker:

So thanks again, Jennifer.

Speaker:

Let's talk about what you know and what you're working on these days,

Speaker:

Who you're interviewing, and how that's really helping the women who

Speaker:

tune in and listen to your program?

Jennifer:

Thanks so much for having me, Isabel.

Jennifer:

Yeah, so the Old Chicks Know Shit podcast is focused on providing inspiration

Jennifer:

and information to mid-life women, who are chasing their dreams

Jennifer:

and what I call creating their kick ass next chapter.

Jennifer:

And by kick ass next chapter what I mean by that is finding the things

Jennifer:

in their next chapter of life, which feel truly authentic and fulfilling to them.

Jennifer:

I've interviewed all kinds of women on their reinvention stories, creating new

Jennifer:

careers, starting businesses, charities.

Jennifer:

Just recently I interviewed a woman who, at the age of 65 decided to

Jennifer:

leave her corporate career, become a documentary film filmmaker.

Jennifer:

So yeah, just I feel very blessed to be able to have such amazing conversations

Jennifer:

with incredible women all over the world.

Jennifer:

Yeah.

Isabel:

Some of your guests really resonated with me.

Isabel:

Of course, Piturro, who founded The Pajama Program and that I subsequently

Isabel:

interviewed a couple of episodes ago, but also that amazing woman,

Isabel:

and now I'm not going to remember her name, but the one who is.

Isabel:

Very different perspective than I've ever heard about chakras and the

Isabel:

relationships that we have in our lives, plus so many others that why don't you

Isabel:

tell us about a couple of your favorite interviews and how that all relates to

Isabel:

this lifting and climbing with each.

Jennifer:

Yeah.

Jennifer:

Gosh, it's so funny because I say this all the time, every time I get finished

Jennifer:

up an interview, I say, that might be the best conversation I've had yet!

Jennifer:

And then I say it again in my audience.

Jennifer:

, I think not starting to believe me anymore, but truly, , everything that I

Jennifer:

share on the podcast is about providing inspirational stories, but also anything

Jennifer:

that helps us understand ourselves better so that we can empower ourselves to do the

Jennifer:

things that it is that we want to do to create the life that it is that we want.

Jennifer:

That Chakras episode that you mentioned that one was a really good one.

Jennifer:

I've heard of chakras.

Jennifer:

I've dabbled in chakras, but the explanation, and I'm

Jennifer:

totally missing her name now.

Isabel:

I'm going to link to that specific episode, cause now

Isabel:

that we're both, showing our age and having intermittent memory.

Isabel:

It's really an episode that's so valuable for everybody to listen to

Isabel:

no matter what age or how great your memory is because it really, it was

Isabel:

something I hadn't heard before.

Isabel:

It was a different perspective and it gave me some more resources in my own toolkit.

Jennifer:

Yeah.

Jennifer:

And I think, like episodes like that and, I cover everything from the science to

Jennifer:

the Woo, which is basically who I am.

Jennifer:

I love it all, and again, I think understanding things on a spectrum.

Jennifer:

So I cover a lot of neuroscience stuff and a lot of, women, doctors

Jennifer:

who have studied that stuff and can tell us how the brain works.

Jennifer:

But then I also, cover like energy systems and like how the energy

Jennifer:

systems in our bodies work and how we can activate them, like activate

Jennifer:

different chakras, things like that.

Jennifer:

I also talk about spirituality because that was a huge part of my own.

Jennifer:

. When I found myself having to reinvent my entire life at the age of 50 it really

Jennifer:

was a personal development, but also a very spiritual journey to expand my

Jennifer:

understanding of who I was as a person and, how I show up in the world and

Jennifer:

the gifts that I bring to the world.

Jennifer:

I truly believe that every single one of us comes onto this planet with

Jennifer:

innate gifts t hat we are supposed to share with the world, and then along

Jennifer:

the path of life we get doing what we're doing, doing all the things.

Jennifer:

And then we cover up these gifts.

Jennifer:

And then when we reach midlife, it's the point where any part of

Jennifer:

us that has yet to be recognized is now, clambering for attention.

Jennifer:

And that's why we start to feel these shifts.

Jennifer:

That's why we start to feel, some discomfort in, in our lives at

Jennifer:

this point, because it's about listening to those parts of us

Jennifer:

that have not yet been expressed.

Jennifer:

. And so all the stuff that I cover on the podcast is about helping us

Jennifer:

understand that and recognizing that, when we bring our most authentic selves,

Jennifer:

our most unique gifts and talents to the world is where we find that,

Jennifer:

purpose and passion and fulfillment that we are all seeking in our lives.

Isabel:

I love the imagery that you created for me about us and this

Isabel:

struggle that it seems to feel like at a certain time in your life...

Isabel:

W here we are born with innate gifts and strengths and.

Isabel:

We get on a track that is directed for us that you're supposed to do

Isabel:

this and the metrics of success include these things and we're busy.

Isabel:

Particularly as women we're busy raising families and building

Isabel:

homes and building careers.

Isabel:

We've continued to ignore, suppress some of those inner callings, to pursue

Isabel:

the passions that are there for us.

Isabel:

I felt myself like almost like I was screaming to get out of me

Isabel:

at that particular time because I pushed the real isabel down so far?

Isabel:

. So I love that you are offering people

Isabel:

tools cuz what not all of us are ready for the same things at the same time.

Isabel:

And I also really appreciate that you are offering us mirrors.

Isabel:

Because that's what I was feeling when I was listening to some of your show.

Isabel:

And by the way, your interview style is so wonderful cuz I really felt like I was

Isabel:

just sitting in with you having coffee.

Isabel:

The mirror that I could hold up to myself when your guests and you were sharing

Isabel:

some of these shifts and experiences.

Jennifer:

And that's the reason why that's one of the reasons why

Jennifer:

I started the podcast is because...

Jennifer:

When my life fell apart around me, right?

Jennifer:

I thought I was all alone.

Jennifer:

Like I truly believed, I was looking out at the world thinking, how come everybody

Jennifer:

else has got their shit together?

Jennifer:

And I'm the one sitting over here with my life in crumbles around me...

Isabel:

Yeah.

Jennifer:

Right?

Jennifer:

And it was only when I started to share my story.

Jennifer:

I started to hear back from other women that it was like, oh, okay, I'm not alone.

Jennifer:

This feeling that I have, this dissatisfaction, like a huge kind of

Jennifer:

embarrassment for me at that time was the fact that, when my life crumbled

Jennifer:

around me and all of the identities that I had in the world were taken away,

Jennifer:

I had no idea who I was.

Jennifer:

And I started to realize again that like I wasn't alone in that.

Jennifer:

At first, I chastised myself.

Jennifer:

I'm like, how could you get so lost?

Jennifer:

, but it's societal conditioning, it's our cultural conditioning.

Jennifer:

All of those things are, like me, I was checking all of the

Jennifer:

boxes of all the things I thought I was supposed to do, Right?

Jennifer:

And still it happened.

Jennifer:

And so what I realized was, is that when I share my story,

Jennifer:

somebody somewhere sees themselves.

Jennifer:

And when I share the stories of the women on my podcast, somebody

Jennifer:

will see themselves in them.

Jennifer:

Collectively, like when we are collectively sharing stories.

Jennifer:

We have the power to raise all ships together, to lift

Jennifer:

us all up at the same time.

Jennifer:

Somebody might hear your voice, and take one thing away from it.

Jennifer:

Somebody might hear my voice and take one thing away from it.

Jennifer:

But the more we share,

Jennifer:

the more we can Lift each other up in the process.

Jennifer:

I have reinvented my life.

Jennifer:

My job now, is to pave the pathway, so that the women coming behind me.

Jennifer:

Who are either younger than me in different stages of their life,

Jennifer:

or different stages of their own midlife crisis, or whatever it is.

Jennifer:

Might be able to take a piece of information that might

Jennifer:

help them on their journey.

Jennifer:

And they in turn do the same thing.

Jennifer:

And so, the power of the collective is absolutely incredible.

Jennifer:

I am thrilled that you stated that because it is, it's like some people would say

Jennifer:

gee why would you promote each other?

Jennifer:

Why are you talking about Jennifer's podcast on your podcast?

Jennifer:

Because we are amplifying the message and we are making it more accessible.

Jennifer:

To, as you said...

Jennifer:

People who resonate with your voice, or my voice, or a particular

Jennifer:

peek into your life, or my life, that resonates with them.

Jennifer:

I also love the fact that we are demonstrating that some of

Jennifer:

those paradigms and untruths of the past need to be blown up.

Jennifer:

That we are not competitive, we are not climbing on top of

Jennifer:

each other as successful women.

Jennifer:

We are all collectively lifting together.

Jennifer:

And raising everybody.

Jennifer:

And I just think, yay.

Jennifer:

There's some shit that we can blow up is that women aren't just backstabbing

Jennifer:

and competitive with each other.

Jennifer:

We are a community all getting better together.

Jennifer:

Yeah.

Jennifer:

That's so true.

Jennifer:

As women, we've been taught to see other women as competition and that

Jennifer:

couldn't be farther from the truth.

Jennifer:

And when it keeps us divided, it keeps us small, right?

Jennifer:

And so we constantly comparing ourselves.

Jennifer:

, and gosh, I've been guilty of that.

Jennifer:

I still do that today.

Jennifer:

And I have to remind myself that my journey is my journey.

Jennifer:

I am a unique being.

Jennifer:

I'm a unique soul with unique gifts, right?

Jennifer:

Nobody can compare anything to anything because we're all living out, our lives,

Jennifer:

living out our purpose, living out our soul's desires in very different ways.

Jennifer:

And the horrible part about it too, is women have been taught to

Jennifer:

be competitive about how we look.

Jennifer:

Comparing ourselves physically to other women.

Jennifer:

Which again, it's like comparing one flower to another flower on the same bush.

Jennifer:

You can't.

Jennifer:

They're all slightly different.

Jennifer:

Yeah.

Jennifer:

When we squash those kinds of things,

Jennifer:

Right?

Jennifer:

And we can see each other as, sisters, as comrades,

Jennifer:

in that we're all, aiming for the same thing, right?

Jennifer:

Like together, there's so much more power in that collective

Jennifer:

than us standing individually.

Isabel:

Absolutely.

Isabel:

It doesn't matter how many times I learned a lesson or I'm exposed

Isabel:

to some new ways of thinking.

Isabel:

Each time that I have another opportunity to be exposed...

Isabel:

I see it differently.

Isabel:

I see it more colorfully, more meaningfully...

Isabel:

And it sinks a little deeper into my soul.

Isabel:

So there could never be enough times in my mind to talk about this.

Isabel:

That as women, we are evolving.

Isabel:

And that,

Isabel:

If you're static and if you're staying by the rules that someone else created

Isabel:

for what's right for your age, your socioeconomic status,

Isabel:

your culture, whatever...

Isabel:

Then it's a loss for everybody, including ourselves by staying that way.

Isabel:

You blew it up or circumstances blew up...

Isabel:

The life that you knew.

Isabel:

That you thought was...

Isabel:

Yes, I've checked all the boxes.

Isabel:

What were some of the first things you realized that were not true

Isabel:

as you went on that journey?

Jennifer:

It's a big question, but the first thing I really realized was,

Jennifer:

I was not the rules that I'd played.

Jennifer:

I had become synonymous with being a wife, being a corporate executive, being a mom.

Jennifer:

And at the time I was like a, a gym rat, very physically fit.

Jennifer:

And when, when all of that was taken away from me

Jennifer:

I honestly thought I ceased to exist.

Jennifer:

So if I didn't have those titles, and if I didn't show up in those ways,

Jennifer:

then I wasn't valuable.

Jennifer:

I wasn't worth anything because,

Jennifer:

what I started to realize was those were my contributions,

Jennifer:

but they were not who I was.

Jennifer:

And so, the idea of seeing myself as separate from the

Jennifer:

things that I did in the world,

Jennifer:

it was a bit of a journey to get there, but it was a very powerful journey

Jennifer:

because when you can see yourself separate from those things,

Jennifer:

you see yourself in a bigger, more expansive way.

Jennifer:

And then the labels and the ways that you've defined yourself

Jennifer:

start to melt away.

Jennifer:

One of the things I used to tell myself all the time is I'm not creative, right?

Jennifer:

Because I had a corporate job, it was strategy, it was numbers,

Jennifer:

it was, this, that, and the other thing but I'm not creative.

Jennifer:

What I realized was when I took that label away, I'm actually a

Jennifer:

very creative person and being creative is like core to who I am.

Jennifer:

It fuels me But I didn't know that before because I had confined to

Jennifer:

the box myself to the box of what I thought it meant to be my job, right?

Jennifer:

As a corporate executive, running a business unit, like

Jennifer:

this is the box that I fit in.

Jennifer:

So separating myself, Jennifer, the person from the roles that she

Jennifer:

played, was a huge realization for me.

Jennifer:

Because, like I said...

Jennifer:

The roles that we play confine us into a certain belief about ourselves.

Jennifer:

And so when we think about doing something different, we

Jennifer:

struggle because we're like...

Jennifer:

Oh, I can't do that because, and then we put ourselves in one of those boxes.

Jennifer:

When really, the reality is we're limitless.

Jennifer:

We can do anything.

Jennifer:

It's not rocket science.

Jennifer:

We can learn anything.

Jennifer:

If we don't know it now, we can learn it.

Jennifer:

As long as we have the desire to do that, we can absolutely do it...

Jennifer:

Decoupling ourselves from the boxes and from the roles and the

Jennifer:

titles that we have in the world is a huge sense of empowerment.

Isabel:

I'm so thrilled you, you positioned that because,

Isabel:

the intent for me with this season of my podcast, is to be able to

Isabel:

showcase ideas and perhaps spark some inspiration for people on

Isabel:

how to make a difference...

Isabel:

How to

Isabel:

identify

Isabel:

their passion, and how to translate that into a purpose

Isabel:

that may be entirely unrelated to anything that they've done yet in their lives.

Isabel:

To free them up, give them permission, by example,

Isabel:

and by these conversations and sharing of wisdom

Isabel:

with people such as yourself...

Isabel:

That anything is possible if you give yourself that permission.

Isabel:

And then just know that all around us are the resources, the people,

Isabel:

the teachers, the mentors, the ideas that we could then go...

Isabel:

Okay, I don't have to know everything yet, but I need to know the first step.

Isabel:

You can't do that easily if you're still holding onto this bar of the trapeze

Isabel:

swing, and you're afraid you'll fall because this is all, this one over here.

Isabel:

I don't know about you, but when I was in that state of my

Isabel:

life of complete reinvention...

Isabel:

I did feel like I was falling...

Isabel:

Life was unknown.

Isabel:

The Lift As You Climb ladder, I fell right off!

Isabel:

Because I knew who I was when I had that business card.

Isabel:

When I had that title of CEO when I, I traveled in the circuits that I traveled,

Isabel:

but when I was no longer doing that...

Isabel:

I literally, I woke up, and said...

Isabel:

Who Am I?

Isabel:

So I love that you and I could share candidly with everyone who's listening.

Isabel:

They're not alone.

Isabel:

It's natural, right?

Isabel:

Like the butterfly, the caterpillar has to trust that when it becomes the goo.

Isabel:

that's not the end.

Isabel:

That there is a butterfly on the other side of that uncomfortableness.

Jennifer:

Yeah, and that's the thing, as humans, we are wired to

Jennifer:

feel like the unknown is going to be worse than where we are now.

Jennifer:

Even if we don't like where we are now, we always naturally assume

Jennifer:

that what we don't know is going to be worse

Jennifer:

than what we know when the reality is, there's a 50 50 shot,

Jennifer:

it could be way better than something we know

Jennifer:

and probably more than 50% chance that it could be something considerably better.

Jennifer:

And then we hold ourselves back in this place where we just continue to

Jennifer:

feel stuck and go around in circles.

Jennifer:

And if we can just, like you said,

Jennifer:

sit through the uncomfortableness of not knowing,

Jennifer:

because that was a huge part of my journey.

Jennifer:

I walked around like for months, almost a year!

Jennifer:

Probably going...

Jennifer:

Okay,

Jennifer:

I don't know what...

Jennifer:

And so, I got to this point where I'm like,

Jennifer:

What do I know right now?

Jennifer:

What would feel good to me right now?

Jennifer:

And I would do that thing.

Jennifer:

Even though I had a bigger horizon that I wanted,

Jennifer:

but the only thing I knew was the next, the very next step.

Jennifer:

And so I would take that one.

Jennifer:

And sometimes we have to do that.

Isabel:

I recall one of your episodes or one of our conversations,

Isabel:

the challenge that we have with our own brain intercepting us in that progress

Isabel:

because its job has been to keep us safe,

Isabel:

keep us away from any potential perceived threat.

Isabel:

Changing who we are, what we do, who we associate with...

Isabel:

What we dream of...

Isabel:

To our ancient brain is a threat, right?

Isabel:

It's like the tiger that's going to jump out of the bushes and get us.

Isabel:

Recognizing that too that it's built into us.

Isabel:

It's supposed to protect us, but we have to recognize it for

Isabel:

what it is and go "It's okay.

Isabel:

Calm down.

Isabel:

I got this.

Isabel:

I'm going to take a step.

Isabel:

We're going to try it out.

Isabel:

We'll see if nobody dies, , we're going to keep going."

Isabel:

That's why I always say, take the smallest step you think you can possibly take in

Isabel:

the direction that you want to go, because it's a little bit of a brain hack, right?

Isabel:

So when you go to take that step, , the alarm bells sound and then you

Isabel:

know, your brain goes, it's okay.

Isabel:

It's okay.

Isabel:

She's just taking this little step.

Isabel:

And versus when you take a giant leap, right?

Isabel:

Like then your brain is like sounding all the alarms, right?

Isabel:

To pull you back.

Isabel:

Yeah.

Isabel:

And so taking those small steps we have a bit of an all or nothing mentality.

Isabel:

It's I need to be doing it a hundred percent, or I'm not doing it at all.

Isabel:

When the reality is any big change that happens very incrementally,

Isabel:

tiny step after tiny step.

Isabel:

You would be amazed at how far you can get with tiny steps.

Isabel:

One day you look back and you're like, wow, look where I was.

Isabel:

Look where I am.

Isabel:

Letting go of that all or nothing mentality and taking those tiny steps

Isabel:

or taking those tiny actions is actually a great way to do it because, our fear

Isabel:

says nothing about our capabilities.

Isabel:

That was another big thing that I learned along the way is, even

Isabel:

though I'm afraid of something does not mean I'm not capable of it.

Isabel:

Oh, now that I need to have that on a t-shirt!

Isabel:

I know you're a speaker and you're an author and a podcaster par excellence.

Isabel:

But I know you've also done some workshops and this is taking me back

Isabel:

to our conversation about intuition.

Isabel:

And how do you connect intuition with taking that next step, Jennifer?

Jennifer:

That's a great question.

Jennifer:

So we all have inside us that little voice, right?

Jennifer:

Before my life fell apart, probably in the five years before that, this

Jennifer:

little voice would pop up every once in a while and it would be this

Jennifer:

question like, is this all there is?

Jennifer:

Is this really what I worked so hard for?

Jennifer:

This little nagging dissatisfaction, and instead of paying attention

Jennifer:

to it, I would basically tell it to sit down and shut up because

Jennifer:

A., I didn't know what to do about it, right?

Jennifer:

Like I had invested so much into the life that I had built, right?

Jennifer:

And B., It scared the crap out of me because if it wasn't doing

Jennifer:

that, what was I going to do?

Jennifer:

Like that huge unknown was in front of me because I couldn't

Jennifer:

see myself doing anything else.

Jennifer:

So I would tell it to sit down and shut up, and I would carry on until

Jennifer:

it got to the point, where eventually the universe grabbed me by the

Jennifer:

shoulders and shook me and said, NO!, we're not going that way anymore.

Jennifer:

We're going this way.

Jennifer:

So I'm taking all this stuff away from you and I'm putting

Jennifer:

you on this track over here.

Jennifer:

Which, looking back on it now, I'm like, thank goodness, because.

Jennifer:

, had I been faced with the choice of okay, you can leave all of this behind, the

Jennifer:

great salary, the great title, the great job, like everything, and go over here.

Jennifer:

There could be some good stuff over for you in the big unknown.

Jennifer:

I would never have made that choice personally because like it was literally,

Jennifer:

I had invested everything to get to where I was, and so that little niggling

Jennifer:

voice was just getting louder and louder.

Jennifer:

Eventually after, everything did fall apart , the only thing I

Jennifer:

had left was that inner voice.

Jennifer:

And so every day I would make time to connect back into myself.

Jennifer:

And this was the other big lesson is in the doing of all the things that I had

Jennifer:

been doing to get to where I was, I had completely disconnected from myself.

Jennifer:

So I'd been checking all the boxes, but nowhere along the way had I

Jennifer:

actually gone, Hey Jen, is this really what you want to be doing?

Jennifer:

Is this the path that you want to be taking?

Jennifer:

And I never checked in to see if I was happy doing it.

Jennifer:

. And so the very first thing that I had

Jennifer:

And, as the universe does, luckily she put me in bed, unable to get out for

Jennifer:

most days, staring at the ceiling, I had nothing but time to connect with myself.

Jennifer:

The more I started to connect with myself, doing journaling free writing, sometimes

Jennifer:

just taking a short walk in nature.

Jennifer:

Like any of those things that I did, I started to be able to hear

Jennifer:

the voice a little bit louder.

Jennifer:

And I would try it, I would test it on small things.

Jennifer:

It's where am I being guided now?

Jennifer:

Okay, you're being guided to the forest.

Jennifer:

Okay, go to the forest.

Jennifer:

And I would just do it on these little things until we built up

Jennifer:

a bit of a trust relationship.

Jennifer:

So just like in any relationship, I'm like, I'm not going to walk

Jennifer:

out into the street and ask the next guy I see, what should I do?

Jennifer:

Because I'd be like you don't know me.

Jennifer:

And so it's the same thing, right?

Jennifer:

I had to build that trust with myself and that inner voice in

Jennifer:

order to get comfortable enough to be able to act on what it told me.

Jennifer:

Now I'm at the point like sometimes, my inner voice is telling me to

Jennifer:

do something and I'm like, really?

Jennifer:

Really?

Jennifer:

You want me to do that?

Jennifer:

Okay.

Jennifer:

All right.

Jennifer:

We're going to try it , right?

Jennifer:

Because it feels so far outta left field.

Jennifer:

How interesting.

Isabel:

You just made me think about how often do we disregard our

Isabel:

higher self, our inner voice, our, wisdom of our soul and ourselves, and

Isabel:

let somebody else make a decision?

Isabel:

Somebody who doesn't know us.

Isabel:

All the time.

Isabel:

All the time.

Isabel:

Good Lord.

Isabel:

All right, people that are listening, . . Think about this.

Isabel:

Like how often are you giving over the decisions about your satisfaction, your

Isabel:

growth, your legacy, your joy, everything to someone else who doesn't know 1% about

Isabel:

you, that you know about yourself, if you take the time to get reacquainted.

Isabel:

. Jennifer: That was literally

Isabel:

My cultural and my upbringing said, do this step, go to school,

Isabel:

make sure you get a good job.

Isabel:

Make sure you do all the right things to move up the ladder.

Isabel:

Like I said, and I never checked in to say, Hey, is this what you want?

Isabel:

I was so busy following this path that had already been laid out for me.

Isabel:

, regardless of who I was inside and what I wanted.

Isabel:

Yeah, absolutely.

Isabel:

In my Encore vernacular, in my programs.

Isabel:

I call it like you're playing a part that somebody else wrote for you.

Isabel:

It isn't your part, but we go along.

Isabel:

We've been typecast into that role, and until you quit that

Isabel:

part, and go, okay, who am I?

Isabel:

And how do I start, how do I stand in the spotlight as the me today?

Isabel:

Because we are, and we're not the same person 10 years ago, or 20 years,

Isabel:

or 30 years ago, thank goodness.

Isabel:

I would love to continue to talk about this.

Isabel:

There's so much richness here in helping people figure out who they are

Isabel:

and what is the legacy for them today that they can actually g rab onto,

Isabel:

believe in trust themselves and be present to influence it and increase

Isabel:

the impact while they're alive, as opposed to waiting till they're dead.

Isabel:

I know that you have a resource that can be helpful for getting people to start.

Isabel:

Could you tell us a little bit about the Five Ways to Get Unstuck and Create your

Isabel:

Kick Ass Next Chapter and why everybody should immediately go to the show notes,

Isabel:

find the link, and download that PDF?

Jennifer:

Five Ways to Get Unstuck and Create your Kick Ass Next Chapter , is

Jennifer:

basically five steps on the journey to understanding yourself, and to getting

Jennifer:

in touch with their inner voice really.

Jennifer:

And we talked about one of them about getting to know yourself.

Jennifer:

There's ones in there about allowing yourself to dream .Right?

Jennifer:

This is a huge one.

Jennifer:

When we were kids, we used to daydream all the time about the house we were

Jennifer:

going to live in and who we were going to marry and how many kids we

Jennifer:

were going to have, and all of that.

Jennifer:

Somewhere along the way, a teacher or parent said stop

Jennifer:

daydreaming and get back to work.

Jennifer:

And then we forgot.

Jennifer:

When we're thinking about our next chapter, it's like we don't have

Jennifer:

anything pulling us forward because we've stopped allowing ourselves to

Jennifer:

daydream about what would feel really good to me, what do I want, right?

Jennifer:

Just create these like little imaginary scenarios because those little imaginary

Jennifer:

scenarios are incredibly powerful.

Jennifer:

First of all, they're powerful reflections of us, like the inside of us, our

Jennifer:

souls voice, our intuitive voice.

Jennifer:

And it's also powerful because it's a GPS.

Jennifer:

Our subconscious mind doesn't know the difference between real and imagined,

Jennifer:

so when we spend time imagining something, our subconscious brain goes,

Jennifer:

oh, okay, yeah, that already happened.

Jennifer:

So when we go to do it, when we go to take steps towards it, and the

Jennifer:

alarm bells go off, subconscious mind goes, calm down, everybody.

Jennifer:

We're just going over here.

Jennifer:

We've already done it before.

Isabel:

And that is truly as simple as it gets, right?

Isabel:

We've rehearsed it.

Isabel:

The fire drills already happened.

Isabel:

We practiced it all those times.

Isabel:

We know which exit to take out of the building,

Isabel:

where to stand, all that stuff.

Isabel:

So we don't get that resistance from our brain, our lizard brain.

Isabel:

Right?

Jennifer:

You can do this.

Jennifer:

It doesn't need to be a huge, elaborate dream.

Jennifer:

You can do it on how would I like my day to go?

Jennifer:

How would I like this conversation that I'm going to about to have go, how

Jennifer:

would I like, this event to go, right?

Jennifer:

Just get in the habit of having a daydream about the perfect outcome.

Jennifer:

And as you do that and you get more comfortable with it, you'll build...

Jennifer:

Right?

Jennifer:

And then I also talk about in that, about, taking tiny steps.

Jennifer:

So we talked about that.

Jennifer:

And the other really important piece, and there's lots more in there.

Jennifer:

It is a journey.

Jennifer:

So it's, I've laid it out in five simple steps.

Jennifer:

They are not linear, nor should they be linear

Jennifer:

because everybody's journey is different.

Jennifer:

But it's five things for you to consider.

Jennifer:

As you start moving towards your journey, and the most important one at the end,

Jennifer:

and we talked about this a little bit at the beginning, is don't do it alone.

Jennifer:

When we are in our own heads, we talk ourselves outta all kinds of stuff, right?

Jennifer:

But when we can, share our dreams,

Jennifer:

our hopes, our desires with like-minded community,

Jennifer:

like people who understand,

Jennifer:

not people who are going to tell us we can't do it.

Jennifer:

Nope.

Jennifer:

We don't want those people,

Jennifer:

we want like-minded community who are where we are at,

Jennifer:

who can, see us for what we are,

Jennifer:

like see things we can't see about ourselves, to hold

Jennifer:

our beliefs on the day when

Jennifer:

we're really struggling.

Jennifer:

I can't do this.

Jennifer:

And somebody will be like, yes you can.

Jennifer:

I can see it in you Isabel.

Jennifer:

I know you can do it.

Jennifer:

Like having that sense of community and belonging is so incredibly

Jennifer:

important because we are not alone like we talked about.

Jennifer:

And together, like the power of a collective of midlife women

Jennifer:

all raising each other up...

Jennifer:

Is beyond comprehension.

Jennifer:

We can do amazing things in the world.

Jennifer:

So it's a five step guide.

Jennifer:

It's not a linear guide.

Jennifer:

It's one of those things that you might pick up and today focus on step one, or

Jennifer:

step four, or maybe step two is calling for to you today.

Jennifer:

It's not as easy as in do step one, step two, and Oh, Hey, Presto!...

Jennifer:

There you are at the end of your living your dream.

Isabel:

It sounds like it's something that you want to keep on your bedside

Isabel:

table, and, on days where the path ahead isn't clear, or somebody maybe

Isabel:

chipped away at your confidence or your vision, go back to, refer to question

Isabel:

one again, or whatever the case may be.

Isabel:

All right.

Isabel:

I thank you so much.

Isabel:

I know that's an incredibly generous and valuable resource and I want everyone

Isabel:

to know that they can find you and listen to the podcast and the amazing people

Isabel:

that you bring on there that are contributing to this collective wisdom

Isabel:

and the community all around us.

Isabel:

So until we meet again, and I hope that we do so soon...

Isabel:

Thank you again, Jennifer,

Isabel:

and thank you for affirming that Old Chicks Do Know Shit!

Chapters

Video

More from YouTube