What we may not know about individuals in our lives can be surprising, especially if they keep deep, dark secrets about aspects that they are struggling with, as they be uncertain about what others may have as a response to certain areas of our lives. How we handle those areas in our lives on the inside does not (& should not) affect what we can be on the outside to treat others, especially in the realm of empowering ourselves. Even at rock bottom, you can change the facets of parts of your life that help to eradicate anything that may stand in your way...including what today's guest offers. As a coach, Bonnie Hardie has navigated various types of situations with her clients, but her story today will enshrine how you can say, "Bon Voyage!", to personal situations, albeit debilitating, to change your circumstances in your life for the better.

Guest Bio

Bonnie is a Women's Empowerment Coach with an emphasis on Mindset/Gratitude/Personal Development/MindBody Connection & is based in Central Florida. She empowers mid-life women to say "Bon Voyage" to the shackles in their mind so that they can live their best life and Reclaim their Joy/ Passion. Bonnie is also a frequent international podcast guest and Summit speaker. She is a vision board expert and uniquely combines a Vision Board and the Wheel of Life - color coding the Wheel of Life. Her 5x5 Formula To A Rock Solid Day Program is 5 activities that can be done from 1-5 minutes in the morning so that your day starts off "Rock Solid", which include areas such as grounding yourself and deep breathing.

Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/bonnieshardie/

Visit Our Website: https://speaking-from-the-heart.captivate.fm/

Visit Our Business Website: https://www.yourspeakingvoice.biz

Support The Mission Of The Business! Donate Here: https://speaking-from-the-heart.captivate.fm/support

Intro/Outro By: Michael Dugan, Podcast Host: Voice4Chefs

Welcome to the podcast where relationships, confidence, and

2

determination all converge into

an amazing, heartfelt experience.

3

This is Speaking From The Heart.

4

Joshua: Welcome back to episode

number 128 of Speaking from the Heart.

5

Today, we'll have Bonnie Hardie

join us, and Bonnie is a woman's

6

empowerment coach with an emphasis

on mindset, gratitude, personal

7

development, and mind body connection.

8

She's based in Central Florida, and

she empowers midlife women to say,

9

"Bon Voyage!", to the shackles in their

mind, so they can live their best life,

10

and reclaim their joy and passion.

11

Bonnie is also a frequent international

podcast guest and summit speaker, and

12

she is a vision board expert and uniquely

combines a vision board with the real

13

life, which is color coding the wheel

of life, which involves color coding.

14

Her five by five formula to a rock solid

day program is creating five activities

15

that can be done for one to five minutes

in the morning so that your day starts off

16

rock solid, which includes areas such as

grounding yourself, and deep breathing.

17

Now, I will say that you might have some

difficulty in some parts of this episode

18

to be able to hear clearly because we

had some technical issues throughout the

19

recording, based on the location in which

she was recording at, but, nevertheless,

20

you will find that in today's episode, I

really thought I had a good understanding

21

of what Bonnie was all about, why she

does what she does, and we even talk about

22

some of these very aspects about what she

really is, but wait till the very end,

23

in which I'm not going to spoil it for

you, but there's quite a surprise about

24

her life story that, even with all the

things that I had found out about her

25

today, I actually realized that sometimes

a book should not be judged by its

26

cover, but, being able to get from that

one side to the other side so that you

27

can empower others, and to help others,

really aligns with not just what my story

28

has been all about, but I'm wondering if

for you today, my listeners, it aligns

29

with you as well, because let's face it.

30

When we get over ourselves, and we get

over the fact that not everything is what

31

it appears, I think you might be surprised

by the end result, especially when you get

32

to know others for what they truly are.

33

But with that, let's go to the episode.

34

Alright, we're here with Bonnie Hardie.

35

Bonnie, thanks for sharing

your heart with us today.

36

Bonnie: Hey Josh, thank you

very much for having me.

37

I do appreciate it and happy Thursday.

38

Joshua: Yes, happy Thursday as we're

recording it on a Thursday, so thank

39

you so much for being able to take

some time to interview with me, and

40

I've already let the audience know a

little bit about you, and I want to get

41

started with this question that I had

just reading your bio to the audience.

42

What got you into coaching

in the first place, let alone

43

women's empowerment coaching?

44

Bonnie: That's a good question, Josh.

45

I get asked that all the time, and I am

my own best client, to be honest with you.

46

I am one of those women that's

not really sure what's going on.

47

What is next for me?

48

I'm not a widower.

49

I'm not a divorcee.

50

I don't have any kids, but I'm at that

age where I'm 59 right now, and it's like,

51

what's the best way that I can help other

people and help myself, so I said, "Look.

52

Yeah, I have been through anxiety,

depression, PTSD, domestic violence,

53

deaths of family members and stuff

like that.", and had people say,

54

"You know, your feelings are silly.

55

You don't deserve this.

56

You don't deserve that."

57

I'm very anti bullying, and

I'm very pro empowerment.

58

My elevator pitch, so to speak, is

I empower midlife women to say "bon

59

voyage" to the shackles of their mind

so that they can live their best life

60

and reclaim their joy and passion.

61

You know, sometimes maybe when you

were growing up, your best friend

62

or your sibling said, "Hey, you

can't dance or you can't sing.

63

You're too loud.", and now when you're

older, you don't want to do anything

64

because of what was programmed in you so

long ago, and you know, Bonnie and Bon

65

Voyage works out pretty good to me, and

it's like, just get rid of the shackles

66

in your mind, and as long as you're

not doing anything illegal, immoral,

67

or unethical, do what you want to do,

do what makes you happy, and if other

68

people don't like that, well, I'm sorry.

69

I'm going to live the life that I want

to live, and you can come along with

70

me for the ride, or you can just stand

by and watch me and wave bye bye.

71

Joshua: Well, it makes me really

want to ask this question.

72

Have you done anything illegal, unethical,

unmoral, because if you're working

73

with people like that, you must have a

story behind one of those categories.

74

Bonnie: No, I'm pretty clean and stuff

like that, and I try to be around people

75

who are pretty clean, and I say, as long

as you're going on the straight path,

76

you should be doing what it is that you

want to do, because you just want to be

77

doing the right stuff and all that kind of

stuff, so, I'm pretty clean myself, and I

78

try to just to hang out with other people

who are cool and don't have any problems.

79

I don't need too many problems in my life.

80

Joshua: Well, hey, I just had to

check because that came to my mind

81

right away, but when you say, "have

people go on a straight path", what,

82

in your mind, what does that mean for

somebody listening, because I think we

83

all have different paths that we take

and they're not necessarily straight,

84

so how do you help people do that?

85

Bonnie: Well, you know, I talked to

them about what their passions are,

86

what their hobbies are, what do they do

that makes them happy, and if they can

87

turn that into something that makes them

money, or some type of business, that's

88

always a good thing, because money is

really important, and, you know, they

89

say you'll never work a day in your life

if you work in doing something you love.

90

What makes you happy?

91

What makes you want to get up out of

bed in the morning and go do stuff?

92

If you wakep every day and you hate

your job, you don't want to get up.

93

You're not motivated; then let's see what

you like to do that's going to make you

94

really want to just jump up out of bed and

be rocking and rolling, even if it's cold

95

out, or rainy out, or whatever, you know.

96

Joshua: Yeah.

97

You saying that made me think of a

couple of things relating to what gets

98

me out of bed; what makes me want to keep

pushing forward, and I work with both

99

men and women, so I'm kind of curious.

100

You probably are doing a lot

more with women as it relates

101

to not only the day to day.

102

I don't know if there's a particular

type of client that you work with,

103

whether that's a business sort of sense

or a personal sort of sense, but has

104

there been a common theme that you've

seen in coaching that maybe some people

105

are struggling over other things, like

maybe they're struggling with work

106

life balance; maybe they're dealing

with setting goals and achieving them.

107

What's the most common thing that you've

seen in your line of helping women?

108

Bonnie: Probably like the setting goals.

109

They kind of know that they want to do

something, but they're not really sure

110

what it is they want, or how to get there.

111

We've got a lot of different things going

on in the United States, and in the world,

112

this year, so I'm a vision board expert.

113

I do vision board workshops, so

114

How is 2022 for you?

115

How do you want your 2024 to be?

116

I came up with this little thing called

117

try to think about what does make you

happy, what you like to do, that will

118

get you motivated to get out and rock

the world and rock yourself, you know?

119

Joshua: How do you rock the world, Bonnie?

120

You got me really curious now.

121

Bonnie: I rock the world by trying to

empower people, trying to uplift people;

122

trying to improve people, see how

people are, and there's somebody that I

123

know that has a little bit of anxiety.

124

She sometimes gets kind of overwhelmed

at work, so I frequent her place of

125

business, so what I did a few days

ago is I gave her something else to

126

think about when she gets overwhelmed,

and starts to get a little anxious.

127

I say, " Why don't you put your mind

onto this for a little while?", and

128

she did, and she came up with a really

great idea that really helped me out,

129

so I do cognitive behavior therapy also,

so that's just kind of switching your

130

behaviors and switching your thoughts

about stuff, so I took her mind off of

131

what was going on right then that was

causing anxiety, and I put it on something

132

else, and then, afterwards, she was

like really happy that she really was

133

able to help me, so I changed her whole

world in like 10 to 15 minutes, so that

134

made me really happy too to see her.

135

A few minutes earlier, she was almost

shaking because she was getting so

136

anxious, and then she's got a big smile

on her face, and she's really happy, and

137

she's telling somebody else, "Hey, look.

138

I did this, and I'm helping Bonnie

with this project, and she's really

139

happy with what I did.", and stuff

like that, so that floats my boat.

140

That makes me happy when I see that

I've helped somebody else today.

141

Be kind to others, and you help others

out, and don't look down on other people.

142

Everybody's the same.

143

Definitely.

144

Joshua: I feel that is such a lost art.

145

I've talked to other guests that I've

had on the show about having that sort

146

of concern to when it comes to not only

addressing the mindset that we typically

147

have about that, but also overcoming that

stigma, because I think we get wrapped

148

up in those sort of thought patterns

ourselves, so when you say that you try to

149

switch people's thoughts about what they

are viewing; I mean, is that the typical

150

sort of way that you do it, given the

example that you have, or do you do other

151

ways of helping people to kind of tune

that thought out that might be bothering

152

them and going into another direction?

153

I wonder if you could share a

couple other ideas or things that

154

you've done as it relates to that.

155

Bonnie: Well, It kind of depends

on the person or situation.

156

Sometimes, I'll tell people, you know,

if you're at your job and you're getting

157

like really anxious about something, have

a code word that you can give to your

158

boss to let them know that you may need to

just go off for a couple minutes, or some

159

people, they like to squeeze stuff or they

have the fidget spinners or something.

160

Just stop, take a couple of deep breaths.

161

Just relax for 30 seconds.

162

Sometimes 30 seconds to one minute

helps tremendously, so just kind

163

of stop, take a deep breath.

164

I tell him into the nose, hold for a

couple of seconds, out through the mouth,

165

because you can kind of tell when you're

looking at them that their shoulders up

166

to their ears, and then their shoulders go

down and you can see them relax and fill

167

your lungs with air completely as much as

you can, so, it just kind of depends, and

168

I know people who do EFT tapping, so I

can do that a little bit, or I do the CBT,

169

or I just help them meditate depending on

the situation, maybe journal a few things,

170

or name a couple things they're grateful

for, and so, kind of depends on the person

171

and the situation, and what's going on.

172

I might only have 32 seconds to help

somebody, so then I have to kind of

173

figure it out real quick the best

way to help that person individually.

174

Joshua: I've heard of CPT.

175

I've actually done that with my

therapist, and I've actually had

176

on the show a therapist that kind

of walked us through some of those

177

aspects, but you said something about

EFT tapping, if I understood you.

178

Could you describe for our audience what

that is and what that process is involved?

179

Bonnie: Yeah, well it's kind of like

acupuncture but without the needles or

180

there's different points that you tap

on your head, above the eye, the side of

181

the eye, below the eye, down here on the

chin sometimes like on the shoulder you

182

know on the top of the head like that,

and it looks kind of weird sometimes,

183

but it kind of makes you more relaxed.

184

Sometimes, I'll sit here and I'll do this.

185

I don't realize that i'm tapping,

because i'm doing like this, and then

186

somebody's like, "Oh.", so sometimes

it's subconsciously that I'm doing

187

that, or like, I'll be under the

table and I'll just be like tapping my

188

arm or something like that, and that

helps relax you because what you're

189

doing when you're tapping, you're

saying like negative things, and

190

then you're saying positive things,

it's like, he's going around tapping.

191

Even though I don't have a lot

of money right now, it's okay.

192

Even though I'm not exactly where I

want to live, it's okay, and then,

193

after a couple minutes, you go,

now I am going to make more money.

194

Now I am going to be living in

a place that I want to live in.

195

Now I'm going to be doing what I

want to do with my job, so, it's

196

kind of like that because they say

you have to get rid of the negative

197

to start the positive, you know.

198

Get rid of all the junk.

199

Cleanse yourself of all

the junk in your body.

200

Cleanse yourself of all the junk in

your mind, and start all over again so

201

it's great to have different modalities.

202

Some people totally specialize in one,

and some people kind of do it right.

203

It's kind of like a doctor.

204

Your general practitioner can do a little

bit of everything, but then sometimes

205

you need the specialist that really

goes deep down with stuff, so, right

206

now, I'm a little more of a generalist,

but I am working on figuring out what

207

I want to do the most and probably the

CBT, the cognitive behavioral therapy.

208

That's probably what I'm going to work

on the most so I am really getting into

209

that and learning NLP and stuff like

that, just try to make people kind of

210

change their thoughts a little bit about

stuff, and so you say stuff to people

211

that, that makes a big difference, you

know, cause sometimes you might have to

212

say something that's kind of negative,

but you want to try to be as positive

213

as possible, so you're not always

like downgrading on people, you know.

214

Joshua: That sounds like me on

a daily basis with this podcast.

215

Maybe I should start doing

some tapping and be like, "I'm

216

going to get more listeners.

217

I am being more positive about this."

218

Bonnie: Right.

219

Joshua: And I'm kidding for my audience.

220

I already love all of you and what you've

done to support this, so, but Bonnie,

221

you started to talk about vision boards

and I want to revisit that subject

222

matter because I've exposed some of my

clients to that technique too, and I've

223

seen all kinds of different types of

ways in which you can do vision boards.

224

I was wondering if you could talk a little

bit about what a vision board is for our

225

audience, and then walk through maybe

some things that you typically do with

226

your clients when it involves that, cause

you have an interesting approach to that

227

involves colors and I thought you maybe

you could share some of that as well.

228

Bonnie: Yes.

229

Well, a vision board, it's, you can do

it online or actually physically do it.

230

You just want to kind of think about what

it is you want your future to look like

231

and you get different pictures and you get

words and put it on a big piece of paper

232

or big piece of cardboard paper, and say

you want to eat healthier so you write

233

the words "healthy eating.", and then you

could grab some pictures of salad or fish

234

or something like that, and put that on

your vision board, or like if you want to

235

take a cruise, go to that cruise website,

take off pictures of the cruise ship,

236

and the onboard activities and the island

that they're going to, put that on there.

237

If you want to just start being more

friendly or say, "I'm a friendly person.",

238

then put a picture of their you smiling,

things like that, and then put that vision

239

board on a place where you're going to

see it on a regular basis, and just when

240

you wake up, kind of look at that and

say, "This is how I want the vision for

241

my life to look like.", and you can't just

put pretty pictures up to look at every

242

day, and you're going to be on the cruise

in eight months on your birthday, right?

243

That's not going to happen.

244

You have to do things to get you to that.

245

You have to think of your why,

and this is why I want to do this.

246

I want to live in a nicer house because

maybe you grew up in a really small

247

house, and now you just want more space.

248

I want to take a cruise, cause

I've never been on a cruise before,

249

and it sounds really interesting.

250

You know, things like that, and it's

like when you're doing things on a

251

regular basis, it's what I'm doing

getting me to my future goals or not.

252

You're not going to be doing stuff

every single day for your future goals.

253

There's some days you just can't.

254

You just don't.

255

You just don't want to see.

256

You just got to sit and spin, and

not really do a whole lot, but if you

257

have future goals that you want to

reach, if you have a vision board,

258

that's something tangible you can

look at, but why do I want to do this?

259

Why do I want to do that?

260

As a coach, I tell people, I'm kind

of like a two year old sometimes.

261

I always ask them, "Why?"

262

Dig in deep.

263

"Why do you want to do this?

264

Why do you want to do that?", and

eventually, we'll peel all the layers of

265

the onions, and we'll get to exactly why

did you want to do what you want to do.

266

Joshua: Yeah, and I was wondering if you

could talk a little bit about the colors,

267

too; the wheel of colors, I should say,

because that's a little interesting.

268

Bonnie: Yeah.

269

That's the wheel of life, and it has

eight categories on it, and categories

270

like personal development, money,

friendship, and the way I do it is

271

I score it on a scale of 1 to 100,

and if you score a 20 percent or

272

below, we color that section red.

273

If you rate it 80 percent and above,

we color code that green, and if

274

you rate it between 20% and 80%, we

color code that yellow, and then you

275

can look at it and it's visual, and

you can see that, "Oh, of the eight

276

categories, four of them are red.

277

That's not good."

278

You're not rating the things very

good, but on the other hand, you

279

can look at it and say, "Hey.

280

Six of the eight are green and

two of them are yellow, so I'm

281

doing pretty good.", and stuff.

282

Nothing on that's going to ever be a

hundred percent all the time for nobody

283

at all, but you want to try to keep

it as high as possible, and that's

284

visual too, because people like, "Well.

285

How often should you do a vision board?"

286

You can do it once a year, every three

months, every six months, whatever

287

floats your boat, so to speak, and you

want to do it and then you can revisit

288

it and you can say, "Hey, I might've

ranked this 40 percent a few months

289

ago, but now it's 70%.", so you're

still in the yellow, but you ranked

290

it much higher, so that's better.

291

You know, and I ask specific questions

about each category, and then if you're

292

rating it very low, why is it low?

293

What do we need to improve, and if we're

rating it very high, why is it so high?

294

What do we need to do to stay that

high, because I don't want to go

295

from green to red in a couple months.

296

That's not a good thing, you know?

297

I've never had that happen with anybody.

298

Everybody's always improved.

299

Joshua: Do you check in with your

clients and actually ask them those

300

questions as to why that goes back?

301

Bonnie: Yes.

302

I check in, and that program right

now is just like a two to three hour

303

program where we do everything all

at once, and then we do a follow up,

304

and then there's regular follow ups

to check in and see how is it going.

305

Is there anything you might

want to change, or something not

306

ranking as well as it was before?

307

Do we need to work on something?

308

In general, how is your life going,

and if it's going bad, what do

309

I need to do to help you fix it?

310

If it's going good, what do I

need to do to help you keep it at

311

that level so you always are as

positive and as happy as you can be.

312

Joshua: You have this five by five

formula that I was wondering if you

313

could talk about a little bit too.

314

Bonnie: Yes, that's my five by five

formula to a rock solid day, and

315

that's five activities you can do in

the morning from one to five minutes

316

each to start your day off rock solid.

317

Part of my business is rock solid women's

empowerment coaching, so you hear me

318

say the words "rock solid" a lot, and my

five activities that I personally do is

319

meditate, journal, practice gratitude,

deep breathing, and grounding yourself,

320

and you can do any of these as long

as you want, as short as you want.

321

I do challenge people to, when they

do the gratitude, to name five things

322

that they're grateful for every day,

and it's got to change every day.

323

I mean, you're grateful you woke up

this morning, but you got to be grateful

324

for other things on different days.

325

In general, how did your

night go last night?

326

Did you sleep well?

327

Did you not sleep well?

328

Do you remember what your dreams are?

329

How do you feel when you wake up?

330

The deep breathing, in through the

nose, hold it out through the mouth.

331

Try to fill your lungs up.

332

Grounding yourself.

333

Go outside and stand in bare feet,

and either it's like the sand, or the

334

grass, and look up towards the sun.

335

Don't look straight at the sun.

336

I don't want you to go blind; kind of

stretch yourself out, and you reach

337

like this up to the stars, so to speak,

and when you do that, it makes you

338

feel so much better, and meditation,

just kind of sit with yourself for one

339

or two minutes and just relax, try to

clear your mind as much as you can.

340

Try to get all the noise away from you

and just try to sit for a minute and

341

you know, how do I want my day to be

today, and what do I need to do to make

342

today, uh, a rock solid day, basically.

343

Joshua: Bonnie, the other thing that

I noticed about your bio is that you

344

have been on international podcasts.

345

You've also done some

summit speaking events.

346

I'm curious if that's helped you in

not only being a better coach to help

347

others, but how has that been able

to impact your style of coaching?

348

Bonnie: Yes, Joshua.

349

I do like being on different podcasts,

talking about a variety of subjects,

350

and I have been on different summits.

351

I usually do speak about women's

empowerment, about mindset, personal

352

development, gratitude, and when I'm on

different summits, it's usually a whole

353

bunch of different people that are guests

also, so I get to watch their interviews

354

and see what type of coach they are, and

how they help their clients, and then

355

just being on different types of podcasts

does get my name out there, and I get to

356

spread my story about what I do and how

I help people, and I get to learn about

357

what it is to be on the other side, cause

I may eventually start my own podcast,

358

or at least do basic interviews with

people, so it's cool to talk to people

359

and see how their setup is and stuff

like that and how they decide what kind

360

of podcasts that they want to have,

what kind of topics and the setups that

361

they do, and how they record them, and

release them, and all that kind of stuff.

362

I know it's a lot of work in the

background and stuff like that.

363

I just pop on to the Zoom link or

whichever link, and start talking

364

about what I want to talk about.

365

It's not that hard for me sometimes, but

filling out the application correctly is

366

also extremely important because you want

to add as much value as you can to the

367

podcast host so they will get a lot more

listeners and so they will get more people

368

interested in listening to their podcasts.

369

Joshua: You know, I had that thought

when I first started out, and it's

370

funny because I recently had a buddy

of mine that helped me to get started.

371

His name is Michael Dugan, and

Michael really emphasized with

372

me, it isn't just about the

followers because that will come.

373

It's about the people

that get to listen to it.

374

They get to grow, and I feel that I

have that sincere following from people

375

because of not just the guests that

I've had, but also the opportunity

376

to be able to learn so much, so

what you're saying is part of it.

377

I feel like the bigger part of it

is just being able to feel like you

378

are being enriched by what they are

sharing with you, and what you're able

379

to take from it, which speaking of

enrichment, you've been doing this-

380

I actually never asked you this.

381

How many years have you

been doing the coaching?

382

Bonnie: Not very long; really

only about two years or so.

383

I was a virtual assistant for a

while, and then I decided to go into

384

coaching and I've pivoted a little bit.

385

I was a mindset, life and gratitude

coach, and then I decided to go into

386

women's empowerment coaching with the

emphasis on the mindset and the personal

387

development, so it's basically kind of

the same thing, but just a little bit

388

different of an angle, so to speak.

389

Joshua: So same boat as me, just

recently starting out, I have my full

390

time job myself, so we're kind of in

this together, trying to figure things

391

out sometimes and being a business

owner, let alone trying to figure out

392

how these bigger picture aspects work

sometimes can be a little overwhelming.

393

I'm wondering for you, what has been

the most rewarding experience in these

394

last two years that you've had, whether

that's with a client, whether that is with

395

what you've achieved in your business.

396

I'm curious because I can list a few

things that I have in just my little

397

over a year doing this, but I always am

curious with somebody that is like minded,

398

trying to also navigate these channels.

399

What has it been for you?

400

Bonnie: It's been pretty rewarding.

401

I've been featured in a few magazines.

402

I was featured in a local magazine

last year as one of only six women

403

next door, and I got the print magazine

and I actually have it taped up in

404

a coffee shop that I frequent on a

regular basis and I actually have

405

autographed it to that coffee shop,

Panera Bread, and I was recognized by

406

somebody in there this morning, like,

"Bonnie, is that you in that magazine?"

407

I say, "Yeah.", so that makes me feel

really good that I'm reaching out

408

to people and people are recognizing

me and realizing that, "Hey, she

409

might be going through a really tough

time personally right now, but she's

410

impressionally, she's trying to really

keep it going and rock on.", so I'm proud

411

of myself for being able to do a lot

of different things and get my name out

412

internationally that I can help people.

413

Joshua: Yeah, and finding that

international recognition can be tough

414

because I feel that the coaching world,

quote unquote, is a little saturated

415

with these people that want to pretend

that they are, or they think that

416

they're peddling the right message,

when really, they're not, because it

417

might have been just from bad messaging.

418

It might have been from things that

they thought were the right things to

419

do, and what really irks me the most

is that I see these coaches that say,

420

"Well, you can make 6 or 7 figures if you

follow my formula and my format.", well,

421

no, I don't want to be just like you.

422

I want to be my unique self, so

I'm going to pave my own path.

423

Sure, there's a lot to learn in terms

of lessons that maybe you have along

424

the way, but it doesn't mean that you

have all the answers, so I'm curious,

425

are you one of those people that wants

to be a six, seven figure coach and then

426

trying to figure out what that means

by following someone else's footsteps?

427

I feel like you are paving your

own path from what you tell me.

428

Bonnie: No, I tell people all the time.

429

I always get people say, "Join

my $50,000 a year program.

430

I'll get you this much.", and I am more

service over selling, and I understand

431

that money is important because we all

need money for stuff; however, if people

432

approach me initially, just talking

about how much money they can help me

433

get to, or how much money they're making,

that kind of to a point turns me off.

434

Joshua: Yeah.

435

Bonnie: Everybody's different.

436

Some people like the lavish things,

and I don't need anything real fancy.

437

I just need a comfortable bed to sleep in.

438

My own private bathroom to use;

WiFi, refrigerator, microwave and

439

a desk, and that's all I need.

440

I don't need anything real fancy and I'm

just kind of plain, and I know people

441

that have a lot of money, and I don't

get jealous at all about that, because

442

they are busting their butt to get their

money, and they can spend it on whatever

443

they want, and eventually I'm going to

be able to be in the space for making

444

enough money to be able to do more

things, but I'm never going to be one

445

of those people that it would be nice

to be able to fly first class, you know.

446

Joshua: Treat yourself a

little bit from time to time.

447

Yeah.

448

Bonnie: Yeah.

449

I mean, I got to be able to treat

myself, but if I'm paying $1,000 a

450

night for a hotel room, boy, somebody

better be reading me a bedtime story,

451

better put a chocolate on my bed,

better give me a stuffed animal to

452

sleep with, and all that kind of stuff.

453

Joshua: Yeah.

454

Bonnie: That kind of

money and stuff, you know?

455

Joshua: Well, yeah.

456

Bonnie: Give me a bathroom to

sleep in and stuff, you know?

457

Joshua: Yeah.

458

I don't know about them tucking me into

my own hotel bed, but a lot of the things

459

that you said sound appealing in itself.

460

Bonnie: Yeah.

461

Yeah.

462

Joshua: Bonnie, we're pretty much at the

end of time, but before we ask you to give

463

a little bit of a pitch about yourself if

people want to reach out to you, I have

464

this final question and it is about what

you just said, is that you said it's about

465

service over selling, so what is it that

you want to leave my listeners with today

466

when it relates to being able to provide

a service to others, because I feel like

467

in this world, we often forget that it

isn't always about necessarily making

468

that quick buck, but it's about being able

to pave it with good intentions forward,

469

but not to jade what you're about to say.

470

I feel like that's sort of my

mantra, so what's your mantra

471

with that as we close out?

472

Bonnie: You know, just serve people

to the best of your ability, and try

473

to help them out as much as you can.

474

It's like a ripple effect.

475

If I help 10 people, who help 10 people,

who help 10 people, I can only do so

476

much with one person, but I can get the

word out about how I help people, and I

477

want people to be motivated and inspired

by me, because the truth of the matter

478

right now, Joshua, is I am homeless, and

I've been homeless for almost two years,

479

and I am still doing all of these things

while being homeless, so my question to

480

a lot of people is, what is your excuse?

481

When I'm sleeping on concrete every

single night and I've got osteoarthritis

482

in my knees, and I can barely walk

half the time anyway, and then that's

483

causing even more problems, so I'm

not getting a lot of sleep at night.

484

I'm always exhausted.

485

I'm not really eating properly because

I have a microwave at my disposal

486

I can use during the daytime at

the coffee shop, but there's only

487

so many things I can put in there.

488

I can't be putting popcorn in there

and making the place smell like popcorn

489

the rest of the day and stuff like

that, but look, I've got a whole lot

490

of things going against me like we

talked earlier, I've been bullied.

491

I've dealt with new

death of family members.

492

I've dealt with domestic violence.

493

I've dealt with anxiety, depression,

PTSD, and add on top of that, being

494

homeless, and then on top of that, being

hungry all the time, and being exhausted

495

all the time, and being this, that,

and the other all the time, but I still

496

get up, very early in the morning, and

spend my days helping other people as

497

much as I can, setting up podcasts like

this, setting up summits, setting up

498

this, that, and the other, and I could

be the one sitting in the corner crying,

499

but is that going to do me any good?

500

If you're going to be a Debbie Downer

all the time, people aren't going to

501

want to hang out with you, so that's why

I strive to help other people, because

502

I don't want people to feel like me.

503

I don't want people to feel like

they're invisible and nobody

504

gives a crap about them, and, "Oh.

505

You're homeless.

506

You deserve to be homeless.

507

Why don't you get a job?

508

Why don't you do this?

509

Why don't you do that?"

510

Why don't you be in my position

and see it's a vicious cycle

511

with a lot of different things.

512

I found out last week that my bank

account got closed down because I don't

513

have a actual address that I live at.

514

I have a box at a UPS store

and then it's like, "Okay.

515

Well, if I had a hotel to stay in for

a while, I can use that address, but

516

I need the money that was in the bank

account to pay for the hotel to get

517

the address to get this, to get that.",

so I'm like, okay, let's just try to

518

figure something out, so I ended up.

519

Deciding to have a PayPal fundraiser that

for one week, just try to get some money

520

so I can at least get a roof over my head

for at least a couple of days, a couple

521

of weeks, so I can have some privacy so

I can have some nice and quiet time so

522

I can be able to sleep undisturbed in a

nice bed and not sleep on the concrete.

523

I hate to ask people for money, but

it's like at this point, all these

524

different things going on, I have

to do something, so it's like, "Hey.

525

I am homeless, but I still try to do the

best I can under my conditions.", and when

526

other people kind of say, "Oh, I didn't

get out of sleep last night because my

527

dog kept barking.", it's like, I don't get

sleep because I am sleeping on concrete.

528

B, there's lights going on all the time.

529

C, there's a hospital a half a

mile away, so five or six times

530

a night, the sirens going by.

531

I don't know what your excuse

is, but you do that one night.

532

I do this every single night, and

I'm really trying hard to get out of

533

being homeless because honestly, the

February 21st will be two years and

534

I'm homeless, and my mom's birthday

is February 20th, and I want to give

535

my mom a really cool birthday present.

536

I have a place to stay and I've been

able to, here and there, get a hotel,

537

to get an Airbnb, or get a hostel

for a little while, but if I could

538

get a place for like at least a month

where I have total privacy, can do

539

what I want, get plenty of sleep.

540

How many things do you

think I can really do?

541

I could totally explode

myself and my business.

542

I just need to have the money to

get the roof over their head to get

543

the business going, but the business

needs to be making the money to get

544

through, so it's like I said, I don't

know where the top part is or what

545

the bottom part is for that, you know?

546

Joshua: Wow.

547

I had no idea when we set this up, or even

talked, that you have been experiencing

548

that for two years, so first off, kudos

to you to have a mindset like yours.

549

That's rock solid in itself, so

definitely bon voyage to anybody else

550

that says that they have it tough.

551

I mean, I feel that I'm humbled by what

you said because after this, I'm going to

552

hang up my headphones, and I can go home

to a warm place, and you don't have that

553

right now, and that makes me feel sad,

but at the same time, what warms my heart

554

is that you're not beaten down by this.

555

You are so much stronger because of

just wanting to keep pushing forward,

556

and for those that ever thought

that it's about, "Oh, well, she just

557

needs to try more.", or, "She just

needs to do a little bit better."

558

That isn't what this has been about,

and for many people, homelessness

559

isn't because of something

that is going on in their life.

560

It might be going on in their life,

but that isn't the sole cause of it.

561

It's all kinds of other things.

562

Bonnie: Right.

563

Joshua: But you inspire me, Bonnie-

564

Bonnie: Thank you.

565

Joshua: For wanting to push forward.

566

You really do.

567

I really mean that, and you open my eyes

to why this is important for me to have

568

people like you on the show, to be able

to share your story, and to also know

569

that there is hope, so, with that said,

I want to give you the last few minutes.

570

If anybody's interested in contacting

you, maybe they even want to help you out.

571

I would love to give you that opportunity

to pitch to my audience anybody that

572

is willing to help you, what they

would be able to do to be able to

573

accomplish that, so I'll give you those

these last few minutes to do that.

574

Bonnie: Well, you know, really what

I need the most, I have my different

575

programs and working on getting a

website so everything is all in one spot.

576

If somebody is interested in having me

on their podcast or join their summit,

577

they can contact me, and if they just

want to send me a private message saying,

578

"Hey, I heard you on Josh's podcast,

and before I was feeling this way, and

579

then after listening to you talk after

that 45 minutes to an hour, this is

580

how I was feeling.", that's going to be

something that's going to make me feel

581

really good because I know that I'm

connecting with people with my story with

582

what goes on, and I'm going to write a

book eventually, and it's going to be

583

called the Rock Bottom To Rock Solid.

584

I am at rock bottom now, but I'm going

to be a rock solid pretty soon, and I

585

remember who was there for me when I was

down, and I'm going to remember who's

586

going to be there for me when I'm up,

and just because somebody isn't doing as

587

good as you right now doesn't make them

a bad person, and anybody can be in this

588

position at any time, and it's not too

easy as long as you just go get a job.

589

I have such bad knees that I was told

I may need to have both knees replaced

590

by the time I'm 60, and that's August

of this year, so that's a vicious cycle

591

with that too, and there's help a little

bit here and there, but there's not

592

that much, and people keep thinking

there's a lot of stuff that's helpful.

593

There's not, and don't you think I know

it goes on in the state that I've lived

594

in for 50 plus years, and in the county

that I've lived in for over 10 years?

595

I know where help is, and I've done as

much as I can, and sometimes you fill out

596

applications for certain things, and it

takes them six months to get back to you.

597

That's nothing I can do.

598

I've done everything I can do.

599

Now I'm waiting on other people to do

stuff, but I'm not going to sit in a

600

corner and wait for somebody to say, "Hey.

601

We're going to give you disability.

602

We're going to give you social security.

603

We're going to give you

free knee replacements."

604

I'm not waiting for that.

605

I'm doing my own stuff, and when I

get those phone calls, we get those

606

emails saying, "We're going to schedule

you for something like this.", or,

607

"We're going to start giving you this

amount of money.", then that's fine.

608

I'm trying to do it all on my own and

just have people sign up for my programs.

609

I hope that when this comes

out, I'm in a much better spot.

610

Well, we'll see about that, but all

I'm asking for is for respect, and

611

just the understanding and don't be

looking down on me because I'm homeless.

612

It doesn't define me.

613

That's just my situation, and if you

ever get in this situation, I guarantee

614

you'll be calling me and saying, "Bonnie.

615

Oh my God, I'm homeless.

616

What do I do?", and I don't really want

to be that person that has to help a lot

617

of other people that are in this position.

618

I don't want to see anybody be homeless.

619

There's very few people that deserve

this, and even if I was a drug addict,

620

or even if I was an alcoholic, which

I'm not, I'm still somebody's sister.

621

I'm still somebody's daughter.

622

I'm still somebody's aunt, and

I'm still somebody's great aunt.

623

How would you want your sister,

your brother, your whomever, treated

624

bad because they're homeless?

625

Would you want somebody to treat you like

that or somebody you love like that, so

626

put the shoe on the other foot, and just

don't stick your nose up in the air,

627

thinking you're greater than everybody

else, because when we die, our coffin is

628

the exact same size, unless you're a real

big person, then you're going to have

629

a bigger coffin, and that's about it.

630

You're not going to be buried in this

big old house you have, or this really

631

nice car and stuff like that, you know.

632

Joshua: You have all my respect, and you

have the respect of my listeners, because

633

everything that I've ever wanted to

start this show about was about the fact

634

that I want people to feel like they're

respected, so there's no disrespect here,

635

and as a matter of fact, it gives me even

more respect for the fact that you have an

636

experience that I cannot hold a candle to.

637

I have never experienced

homelessness, and I hope that I don't.

638

I've come close, and I don't even tell

some of my close friends this, but I

639

have come very close to losing it all

because of some of the things that I've

640

been, but for some reason, for some other

part of what's been going on, I don't

641

know why, but sometimes it just always

works out, but it means the same thing

642

for you is that there is a time, there

is a place, it will work out for you,

643

and for all those reasons, Bonnie, thank

you for being on Speaking From The Heart.

644

Thank you for not only being a

coach to others, but also being

645

a coach to me because I certainly

learned something from you today.

646

Bonnie: Thanks a lot, Josh.

647

I really do appreciate being on Speaking

From The Heart, and I really did speak

648

from the heart, so I hope that when people

listen to this, they are inspired and

649

motivated by me, and by you, and they

go out and just do what they want to do,

650

and don't be chained by the shackles in

your mind from what happened in the past.

651

Say, "Bon Voyage!"

652

to all those shackles in your mind.

653

Joshua: Bon voyage to a lot of

those different things, for sure.

654

Thank you again, Bonnie.

655

Bonnie: All right.

656

Thank you, Josh.

657

Joshua: I want to thank Bonnie for being

part of the show, but more importantly,

658

sharing the fact that she has been

through so much to get to where she is,

659

especially right at the end of her story,

which was quite a shocker to me, even

660

when I was interviewing because I had

no idea about this, nor did she ever say

661

anything until the very end, but I don't

think it was saying it, more than it

662

was about actually admitting that maybe

there is some other things that really

663

motivate her to keep pushing forward.

664

Let's face it.

665

We all have different motivations in

which we are able to work with others

666

based on what we have as a background, but

Bonnie's story in itself, once I realized

667

this towards the end of this interview,

it made me put in perspective why it's

668

so important to help others, even with

having that pro-type attitude that we

669

talked about, so how do we create that

engagement within us to address that?

670

How can we even move others to be able to

do that so that they can walk a straight

671

line, as opposed to a wavy, crooked

line that sometimes life throws at us?

672

Now, I'm not saying either that being

able to walk through those lines,

673

or even walk through those difficult

journeys means that you should be taking

674

a break, or even letting that even pass

by for that matter, because sometimes

675

walking that wavy line can help us grow.

676

It allows us to stretch outside the

straight line that we've always walked

677

on, but if we really want to remain

focused on some of the things that help

678

us to move that needle forward, or move

that goal forward for that matter, we

679

have to look at how those wavy lines

and even those straight lines all align.

680

Straight lines sometimes in themselves

need to be available so that we can

681

keep on seeing that path that is right

in front of us., Although sometimes

682

the fog, or even the light that even

illuminates it, prevents us from

683

being able to really see that as well.

684

What can we do to set goals?

685

What can we do to be able to move

some of those aspects forward?

686

How do we rock the world by switching

our thoughts, and our feelings,

687

and our emotions of what's involved

into a more positive mindset?

688

Well, I think that Bonnie

shared a lot of that today.

689

It's just about really looking at

it from a different perspective.

690

It doesn't mean, though,

that you lose sight of it.

691

It doesn't mean that you keep thinking

that nothing's going to ever change.

692

It means actually looking at what

things are happening with your mindset.

693

Are you grateful for the

things that are involved?

694

Are you happy with the personal

development that you've been channeling?

695

More importantly, is there a connection

between not just your mind, but your

696

body as well, in order for you to

understand the mere importance of not

697

just your body, learning how to evolve

not just expanding your thought process

698

not just changing your mindset, but more

importantly, how are you going to be

699

able to get from one point to the other?

700

How can we switch that thought?

701

How can we turn on that light switch,

or even flip off a light switch for

702

that matter, of those codes that

our body is shooting towards us,

703

whether it's stress or an anxiety that

tingles throughout our arms and legs?

704

How can we relax, provide various forms

of engagement, whether that's through

705

tapping or breathing or growing in

areas that normally you don't feel

706

like you should be involved in, but yet

you need to be involved in so that you

707

can continue to move in that direction

that you always wanted to go in.

708

Let's be real.

709

Vision boards, which is something

that I even use in some of my coaching

710

practices, really involve not just looking

at cut out pictures of magazines, or

711

even some of the items that are laying

around your house as even Bonnie's

712

talked about, but it's really describing

what you want to create in your life.

713

What do you want to achieve as

that ultimate vision of yourself?

714

Clients that I have do this exercise

really help to not only learn more about

715

what they have inside themselves that

is really dormant, or oftentimes not

716

thought about, but it creates a vision

for what it is to be the real person,

717

their first name and last name included,

but yet, you have to understand, for

718

some people that are willing to do this,

it means actually staying committed

719

towards the end goal, regardless

of what you might face, and that is

720

really the biggest challenge in itself.

721

When we look at personal development,

when we look at life in general,

722

how many times does it need to be

done before it actually gets done?

723

That ultimate goal that we wanted

to achieve; why do we have to

724

do all these extra small things

that are involved with it?

725

More importantly, what can

we do to just overcome?

726

Why can't we always just be on that

straight path, instead of walking

727

all over the place in wavy lines?

728

That's easier said than done, but yet,

at the same time, that's why we have

729

exercises like meditation, yoga, getting

yourself away from the environment

730

that you're in that is oftentimes not

allowing you to unlock that creativity.

731

Just changing your scenery can make all

the difference, but to be able to fit into

732

this other side, this other opportunity

that we have inside of ourselves means

733

that we have to talk about what we need

to talk about, whether we're facing

734

that with a coach that is completely

impartial to it, or it's something

735

else, but you have to be able to have

the bare essentials to be able to do

736

so, and sometimes, the people that you

think are really having it all together,

737

oftentimes lack the bare essentials.

738

It's so uncanny.

739

Somebody like this incredible woman

who's homeless, who has been fighting

740

her way through life, no matter

what struggles there have been,

741

has been able to even help others.

742

Now if that isn't a heart of gold, and

that isn't anybody that you ever thought

743

of in your life that maybe hasn't been

able to be there for you regardless

744

of what you've tried to do to get them

involved, I think that you need to talk

745

to this lady and see what she's all about,

because she puts service over selling.

746

She gets where she needs to go,

even with the rock bottom, rock

747

solid philosophy that she has.

748

She has to keep pushing herself forward

no matter what struggles may lie ahead.

749

I

750

mentioned earlier about how this episode

was a little bit of a technical struggle.

751

Matter of fact, Bonnie recorded this

at a library where she was able to

752

get free Wi Fi access; be able to

have access to a computer to be able

753

to even do this, because she relies

more on a cell phone to do everything

754

that she ever needs to do in her life.

755

Because that's all she

really has at the moment.

756

Now, if you're interested in reaching

out and contacting her, feel free!

757

Her information's in the episode

notes, so you can do that.

758

I'm sure she'd be grateful for the

donations that you would give her, so

759

that she could get back on her feet,

but that's really what this is about.

760

Community.

761

Building that.

762

Growing that.

763

Investing in it, and no matter what way

you might look at it, even if you have

764

a five by five formula, or you have a

joy for the world in which you want to

765

live in, in a completely different way,

just remember that there are people that

766

don't even have the bare essentials,

let alone even free Wi-Fi for that

767

matter, to be able to access some of

the vast resources that, even across

768

the world, many people don't even get

the chance or the opportunity to enjoy

769

because of their socioeconomic status.

770

You know, on this show, I've always

believed that everybody has a voice,

771

but this really takes a whole new level

of responsibility today in what I have

772

said, and what I've even interviewed with

Bonnie, being a coach herself, which, even

773

with all that said, I don't have pity.

774

More so, I have hope for her.

775

I have opportunity that I see in her.

776

I believe in everything that she is able

to do because of her perspective, and

777

as I've always said about my coaches

on this show, it's about what we bring

778

as a different perspective based on our

life, personal, business, professional

779

experiences, regardless of what it is.

780

Bonnie has a leg up on me when

it comes to having that plight

781

of homelessness for that matter.

782

The next time that you feel that

you have to shake the core of your

783

world in order to get to a different

direction, ask yourself if it's really

784

shaking it to the very foundation.

785

If it's really testing your faith, your

limited ability to be able to grow in

786

vast different ways, because if you could

switch our feelings and our thoughts

787

into something that we could really

be negative about, but yet change our

788

thoughts to be more positive, to be more

encouraging, to be more thoughtful about

789

the ways in which we're helping others.

790

If we can be more pro about what we

are able to do, imagine what we can do

791

for others, just like my guest today.

792

There's been a lot of things that I

have been through in my life, but I

793

have to say homelessness is one of the

biggest struggles in this community

794

that not only I live in here in South

Central PA, but I know across the United

795

States for that matter, and it's only

grown worse as time has gone on, so

796

I have these words of encouragement

for those that are out there.

797

First off, there are a lot

of resources available.

798

If you're not sure where to turn to, reach

out to me: podcast@yourspeakingvoice.biz.

799

I don't care where you live.

800

We'll figure it out.

801

I'll put you in the right connection, I'll

put you in the right place, especially

802

with all the numerous people that I have

been able to meet, not just because of

803

Speaking From The Heart, but because of

my business, Your Speaking Voice LLC.

804

That's number one.

805

Number two: If somebody like Bonnie

can have such a positive mindset and

806

be able to help others, no matter

what she has going on in her life,

807

that means that there is hope for you,

and that no matter what circumstances

808

have put you there in the first place,

even if it's your own mental health.

809

Know that there's always excellent

opportunities for you, and there are

810

ways that we can get you involved, right

back from square one, but my final thing

811

that I want to say to you is that no

matter what way you look at it, no matter

812

which way it might be where you might

be despondent because of how people have

813

ridiculed you, or put you down, or it

might have been something else completely

814

different, whether it's related to a

job loss, medical issues, or something

815

else, just know that there are some

good people in this world, and they're

816

willing to help you no matter what.

817

They'll figure out a way, even if they

can't do it themselves, because no

818

matter how many times it takes to get it

done, it's about the chance that you can

819

overcome it that really matters the most,

so no matter if you're homeless or not,

820

I want you to know that you are the hope.

821

You are the world for some of these people

that need it the most, and you might

822

have some valuable resources, which for

others, might be just the bare essentials

823

they need to keep moving forward.

824

Thanks for listening to episode

number 128 of Speaking From the

825

Heart, and I look forward to

hearing from your heart, very soon.

826

Outro: Thanks for listening.

827

For more information about our podcast

and future shows, search for Speaking From

828

The Heart to subscribe and be notified

wherever you listen to your podcasts.

829

Visit us at www.yourspeakingvoice.biz

for more information about potential

830

services that can help you create

the best version of yourself.

831

See you next time.