There are movies that ask “what if?”… and then there’s what if we found a mysterious white goo bubbling out of the earth and immediately devoured the forbidden Cool Whip?

That’s the energy of The Stuff, and we are all in on this deliciously unhinged ride.

What starts as a simple “hey, don’t eat that” quickly spirals into a full-blown corporate satire with killer yogurt, brainwashed families, and a kid who responds to existential horror by absolutely wrecking a grocery store.

We discuss:

• The wild filmmaking style of Larry Cohen (permits are more of a suggestion)
• The “Yogurt Factory” court case that shaped entertainment law
• Whether we would eat The Stuff.

Mentioned in this episode:

• Curb Your Enthusiasm
• Ghostbusters (1984)
• Men in Black (1997)
• Space Jam (1996)
• A Nightmare on Elm Street (1984)
• Google Maps
• Beanie Babies
• Tickle Me Elmo
• Labubu
• Panera Bread
• Four Loko
• Mountain Dew Zero Sugar

Our Links:

• BMovieBoys.com
• Official Discord
• Patreon
• Facebook
• Instagram

Incoming transmission. Incoming transmission. Let's boogie.

Welcome to the be movie Boys. Where bad movies get the love they deserve and the respect that they don't.

I'm Dave Michaels.

And I'm Bryan Betz.

Bryan, I got a quick question for my man.

A question for me.

Do you like it to stuff?

Do I like it to stuff? Oh, I like it.

Yeah, that's deserved again, this is one.

Of those movies where I loved watching it and then I loved reading about it even more.

I don't know a whole lot about the lore behind this one, so I'm excited to find out more.

There's so much and one of the things that I read is legitimately incredibly important in filmmaking. Kind of just like creating in general, actually, not even just filmmaking, just creating in general entertainment law.

Okay, I think I know where you're going though. It might be the one thing I did read about this.

Oh, good. I'm glad that you tuned in briefly, Bryan. Thanks for putting in the effort. Bryan.

You know me, I. Well, you know, I just got addicted to this new dessert and then next thing I know it's time to record the stuff. The Stuff.

You like this thing, right? There's no way you did. I know you.

This thing is a fucking blast.

Watching it with people is even more of a blast. This was a lot of fun to watch. How do you think it's gonna score on the B movie scale though, on the Schlockometer?

Ah, it's hard to say because this is a little bit of a higher budget B movie.

Kind of, but not really.

Kind of, but not really? Yeah, it's got some names in it. It's an interesting pick and I think it's going to do pretty well though arbitrarily.

I think it's going to do great or not.

Based on the do I like it? Quotient, which usually pushes things in a certain direction. This thing's probably going to score pretty well.

You want to find out?

Let's find out. Let's get right into it. Our first category in the Schlockometer is the audacity.

But before we can even get into that, we need to talk about the story of The Stuff.

Our heavy handed story begins when some quarry workers find this white creamy goo bubbling out of the ground naturally. Instead of calling the epa, they taste it. It's delicious, calorie free and addictive.

So obviously corporate America decides to package it and sell it as The Stuff.

We love a good beginning where a guy finds some stuff on the ground and says, hey, let me put that in my mouth real quick.

It couldn't have even been 10 seconds into this movie. You get dropped in media stuff and the guy. Yum.

I for a moment was like, did we start in the middle of this movie? What's going on right now?

Before I started the movie, I had to take a few times like, is that actually it? Am I fast forwarding it like through halfway through the movie? Like this is the movie, right? This thing just dives, right? It drops you right in.

It's like a Google Maps. Placing the little yellow man in a place and you're facing the wrong direction. It's not the house you were trying to find that you're trying to find.

Why is it always facing the wrong direction? It's always facing the wrong way. Every time I typed an address in Google and then I dropped a little man, why is he always looking the wrong way?

Because maybe it's a whole like stage left, stage right. But it's like Google left, Google right.

Yeah, we're on the Google right side of the road.

I feel like Google's more just like. Because fuck you, that's why. Keep using our shit, you're gonna do it anyway. I don't give a shit which way this guy faces.

God damn it. We're gonna get a couple extra clicks out of you one way or another.

Hey, why don't you just try turning around, you lazy asshole.

All you gotta do is drag and drop.

Is it not amazing enough that there's a spot where you could just be in the middle of the road and look around? Is that not amazing enough for you?

Oh yeah, we drove all over the entire fucking world and took pictures for you, but get upset because we placed you the wrong direction when we dropped you at the exact point you were looking for.

It's a goofy ass van that has a giant disco ball on top that takes pictures. And you know who's been laid driving that van? Fucking no one ever. Never ever.

Really? You think so?

No, 100%. That dude.

Oh, yeah.

I don't say that. When they put the Google street guy down on the the street, he's facing the wrong way. We say he's facing reverse cowgirl. You know what I mean?

Because I, I'm the Google mat man in my Google mat van.

Because if you saw what was happening in front of the camera, oh, you'd.

Be seeing his oh. Face with Google, there's Two O's, but it's too sad. It's very complicated. This is a silly language that we see.

Goo face.

Oh, boy. I love this movie.

That was an early tangent and a fun one.

I've been watching a lot of Curb youb Enthusiasm lately, and I think it's starting to, like, seep into me a little bit too much.

You're just becoming more and more Larry David.

Maybe a little bit. And it's not even like I'm becoming, like, curmudgeony. It's just I'm letting the things out that have just been bubbling up, and I get it.

It's cathartic as hell. I get it.

Well, you don't have to be facing the right direction to realize this stuff is going to become a global sensation overnight. It's everywhere. Commercials, grocery stores, everyone's fridge. It's the perfect product, because the more you eat, the more you need to eat.

This was during a time when actual stuff could become a sensation overnight. It's not like a whole six, seven. Like, you need words or something like that to catch on.

Like, the Beanie Baby phase came not too far after this decade, but you had all these toys that were like, the big deal and the big fads and whatnot.

Yeah.

Do we have that anymore?

It's hard to say because, like, things go viral and fall out so fast now that I think we still have that, but it's on a much smaller scale because it never gets big enough to be a sensation like this.

So you're saying that, like, the 90s? Tickle me Elmo now is really a girl who's talking about spitting on a thing to suck it?

Yes and no. I'm thinking it's more like a Labubu, but, like, after a week, nobody cares about them anymore.

Maybe fads just come and go a.

Whole lot faster then everything happens at warp speed now.

That's a good point. Scary point, but good point.

Yeah. The Stuff would have already wiped us out before we moved on to the next thing.

Oh, I would have eaten The Stuff.

Oh,.

Those people seemed psyched to have eaten The Stuff, and I'm so jealous of them.

And with that awesome packaging, I would have been first in line. Like, give me some of this stuff. It's no calories, and it's delicious. Delicious. Give me it.

Do you think that The Stuff has, like, different flavors and whatnot? Like, it looked like it was Neapolitan through and through, but then when you opened it up, like the tub, it was just.

Vanilla yogurt. Maybe Even unflavored yogurt. But something about it, man, the way.

The Stuff looks, it's like the reason why we all want to lick Venkman at the end of Ghostbusters when He's covered in Mr. Stay Puff.

Yeah, that's definitely a thought I've had watching that movie. Oh, man, I just want to lick him.

I'm not crossing streams. I don't know. Harm no foul.

As long as you don't. Well, in the end, you kind of have to cross streams. Otherwise you don't get that delicious gooey. Wait, never mind. Let's. Let's move on.

So this movie's got a kid protagonist. Yeah, his name's Jason. He has the face like. He definitely found his dad's porn stash, and he was surprised at what he found.

Oh, that's not what I was expecting.

But he catches his dessert moving on its own in the fridge one night.

You know, you can only get smacked on the ass by your dad so many times for not eating dessert before you have to go and wreck a Kroger.

I feel like this is the perfect time to introduce Larry fucking Cohen. Are you familiar with Larry fucking Cohen?

I am a little bit familiar with Larry fucking Cohen.

He is looked at as the guerrilla king of filmmaking, permits be damned.

We don't need no stinking permits.

It spoke to me honestly, the amount of times I faked permits like this felt good knowing that, like, yeah, absolutely. Larry Cohen could do it. Anyone could do it, Jeff.

Larry could do it. I could do it.

I'm retconning my own moral compass about doing what I did.

If Larry, the king of Blaxploitation Cohen can do it.

The reason I feel like it's appropriate to talk about Larry Cohen here after this kid trashes the supermarket. Because this supermarket was not a closed set.

Oh, no way.

This supermarket was a stolen shot.

How did they get all the product in there?

Because they told the supermarket that this was a small student film, so they got the product in there. They did not tell the student that there was going to be a child running around screwing about alien goo and smashing cartons.

Well, this just became my favorite thing about this movie.

And apparently this is a Larry Cohen special where he would send his actors into crowds of people to just do nonsense things for the movie. Like this child running into a supermarket and smashing up an entire aisle. All gorilla. All the reactions of everybody that you see is genuine.

No one knew this was going to happen. And he said, we're going to have to get in there and get out real fast because I didn't tell him about the second part.

You're going to get authentic reactions from people that you would never get out of, extras that you hired. So I think that's a brilliant move.

Well, he's done this before because he also shot a movie up in Harlem years before this one where he did a gang hit in the middle of the street.

It's a little bit more bold than a little boy knocking over some yogurt.

Yeah, I'd say. But still. Oh, God, these stolen shots. I absolutely adore it. This is the way to do it. So much fun. God, I love Larry Cohen.

So obviously the overnight success of this stuff is putting the ice cream industry in trouble. The whole ice cream industry is dying because of The Stuff.

So they hire David "Mo" Rutherford, an industrial saboteur, an ex FBI guy who's as charming as he is ethically flexible.

He is accidentally flexible.

I was gonna say his accent is more flexible than anything in this movie. His catchphrase, "I'm Mo, because whenever people give me money, I always want Mo."

Can we please talk about Michael Moriarty's choices in this movie?

This man makes choices and commits to them and maybe shouldn't, but he had.

To because he made the choice really early on and then had a roll with it.

Well, I guess I'm gonna have a southern accent in this movie and it's gonna change regionality in every single scene.

He improv the accent. And Larry Cohen loved it and the production company hated it. And he said, I'm doing it. We're rolling with it. I'm having a good time.

It's too late. It's. It's on the film. So we got it. We got to stick to it.

I love this. He's a truly hard, trained actor. Like, he's a good actor and he just, yeah, understands exactly what type of movie he's in.

While Mo is investigating or planning or whatever it is Mo does in this.

Movie, I think he's trying to find out what's going on with The Stuff so he can shut it down so big ice cream can move in.

That's what I think too. But the whole FBI. It's not important. He's going to team up with this guy named Chocolate Chip Charlie.

He's this junk food mogul who lost his empire to The Stuff in the 80s.

You could shut down entire industries by introducing a new product just like that. Like ice cream? I've never heard of that. What are cookies? I only know The Stuff.

Chocolate Chip Charlie and Mo are going to head to the small town where everyone's acting like a Stepford wife on a sugar high, only to find that the local postmaster is literally hollowed out.

That's not ideal.

Not what you want from your postmaster.

No. You usually want him to be a functioning human being who delivers mail.

I don't even know about that. Like it is still a postal service.

Yeah, like barely functioning.

Barely functioning is just fine.

Not a shell of a human being that looks like it's recently been stuffed with marshmallow fluff.

You're describing everything out of, like, Men in Black right now.

That's true. Did Men in Black rip off this movie?

What didn't rip off this movie?

Fair. If you haven't figured it out yet, The Stuff is a parasitic organism.

It doesn't just taste good, it eats you from the inside out, takes over your brain, and eventually turns you into a mindless stuffy before bursting out of your skin. Leaving behind a metaphor that even Helen Keller would find in a game of hide and go seek.

They're laying it on pretty thick.

It's almost as thick as The Stuff itself.

Mo is going to save Jason, then he's going to team up with Nicole because names in this movie.

Yep.

Nicole was the marketing genius who originally sold The Stuff to the world, and she sold it so hard that she's going to have to unsell it even harder. And you want to know how she does that? I don't know. They didn't do it.

They really.

I don't know why she's in this movie.

They needed to have a woman.

Is that the same reason why they got Garrett Morris as Chocolate Chip Charlie? Not a woman. But you know where I'm going.

Morris is so good, too.

I saw him say something about, like, somebody was interviewing him about this movie and asked him his opinion of Larry Cohen, and he said, well, I was told that if I have nothing nice to say, to not say anything.

Smart man.

Yeah. Apparently production on this was wild.

Well, yeah, it's a Larry Cohen movie. We're just stealing shots left and right because this woman is unselling the public, so.

Well, maybe they have to get the military involved, they need some serious firepower in order to deal with The Stuff. So they recruit Colonel Malcolm Spears.

It's Paul Sorvino, who's a super paranoid right wing militia leader who's been waiting his whole life for any excuse to start a war. I feel like this is like a he who should not be named type thing.

It does sound a little bit like.

That's where we are.

Isn't there a whole bit where like he had an affair with an underage woman too? This is part of his back.

Colonel too real.

Yeah, Colonel Malcolm Two real Spears. So they gather the crew together and infiltrate a massive distribution center.

It's a full blown corporate fortress built around a literal lake of the white goo. They realize the company's plan isn't just profit, it's total biological takeover. Or, you know, as it's known today, modern capitalism.

This movie scarily works today, like really, really well.

Really well. Maybe even better than it did back then.

Yeah, it's a full blown satire. It's not hiding it, not even a little bit. But it's like everything's landing everything in. One of the best and grossest practical effects of the 80s.

Poor chocolate chip Charlie's head basically unhinges and a massive tide of The Stuff pours out of his throat to attack Mo and the gang. It turns out that the only thing the goo hates is fire, electricity, and a proper green screen.

They had some issues with the chroma keys here.

They sure did. We'll get there.

We sure will. The Colonel's militia takes over a radio station that he may or may not own. He keeps calling it his station.

He says it a few times. He Sundays, I own two stations.

Surely. Yeah. So while Mo is busy electrocuting The Stuff, they get a message out to the whole country to stop eating The Stuff. It's alive. Burn it.

I think they say cook it. Which is an interesting choice of words because like you think you would cook something and then eat it. Exactly.

And then in the biggest logical leap of the movie, the entire public actually listens and they start purging all of.

This stuff just like that.

And sure enough, the world listened. Did they?

I can promise you that that would not happen.

They I can imagine like an entire side of the political spectrum going, yeah, you could take my stuff from my cold dead hands.

Which side would it be?

Yeah, who knows right now?

I know which side I'm on with everything. And I would absolutely eat The Stuff. And I don't know what that says about me.

You know what? You're right. I would also eat The Stuff. But I feel like if somebody said, hey, stop eating The Stuff.

It's killing you, I'd be like, okay, I'll give up The Stuff. I wouldn't be like, "mah liberties!"

Do you think that there'd be a sign that would double down, just, I need to eat more stuff?

Oh, yeah. They don't want you to know that The Stuff's actually secretly good for you.

It's about time that there's a white food that tastes good and it's good for you.

I heard that this stuff has anti microchips in it, and they don't want you eating it because it deletes all your inner microchips.

Mo visits the corporate lizard behind the operation, Mr. Fletcher. The guy is under pen and reveals a new product called the taste.

It's only 12% stuff, so it makes you a lifelong addict without immediately hollowing out your skull.

All right. I mean, that's an improvement, right?

I guess so. Especially since didn't Gatorade just come out with less sugar?

Like they had the zero sugar, where people were like, yeah, but you put some bullshit in there to make it have zero sugar. That's not how that works.

Right? Why is the no sugar version sweeter than the sugar version?

So they're like, you know what? You're right. You caught us. We're going to have a less sugar version in it.

It's like when there was Mountain Dew and there was Diet Mountain Dew. And they're like, actually, we're also going to put out zero sugar Mountain Dew, because it turns out diamond do still add some sugar in it.

So 12% stuff.

I mean, technically, that's more stuff than that than what's in Michael's secret stuff from Space Jam.

That is a very good point, because.

That's technically zero percent stuff.

Yeah, but it also was pds. Let's just. We don't need to go there right now. We don't need to talk about that. How that is morally not okay. I understand the Monstars.

Aliens from the universe. I understand that.

But they were just trying to even the playing fields.

That's the problem though, Bryan, is you.

Keep even the place.

It's a very slippery slope to go down. And eventually you're facing Monstars with Michael Special stuff. And it turns Out. Yeah, it's just water. I understand. A placebo's work too. I get it.

Why is Bill Murray and Wayne Knight in this movie?

Nobody ever talks about the long lasting effects of Michael Secret stuff either. I mean, it makes Lola's tits fall right off.

Right off for a modern age. They made her PC, she drank secret stuff.

I'm pretty sure it's turning the frogs gay.

Oh, the tits fell off for the bunny. Well, of course we're all going to turn gay now.

I dare you to take this stuff away from me.

Cold Dead. Yeah. It was this side the whole time. I can't believe it.

Mo isn't having it. He's not a fan of the taste. He and Jason. Yeah, the little boy. They hold the moguls at gunpoint and force them to eat The Stuff until the cops arrive.

Just spoonful after spoonful of cup after cup of The Stuff. Mo leaves them with a heavy hitter line. "Are you eating it or is it eating you?"

Then of course, the credits hint at the black market, which is already selling original recipe stuff to addicts who just can't quit. Kind of reminds me of Four Loko. Bring back the original recipe, you cowards.

They really should. Only a few people died.

It's like those lemonades from Panera, they were delicious. And like, how many people died? How many? Like two, three.

Well, set up memorials to them. Like, it's not like we're going to.

Forget that we can name the flavors after them.

Yeah, like Pussy Pete. And not because he liked it, it's because he was one. Because he fucking died drinking a Panera drink.

Panera lemonade. Could you imagine arriving at the afterlife and they're like, oh, yeah, how'd you die? Oh, the Panera lemonade.

What?

Yeah, Panera made a lemonade that had a lot of caffeine in it and I drank a couple of them and now here I am.

Surely you mean you got a bowl of broccoli cheddar soup in a bread bowl and that your arteries clogged up and that's how you died?

Right, Fuck it. Let's put caffeine in the broccoli cheddar soup too.

Can we, please? It's so good. It's the only thing that's good there.

I know your opinions of Panera, or as we call it in these parts, the St. Louis Bread Company.

Okay, my take here is we're basically doing the Blob and Invasion of the Body Snatchers, but with a very different take on it. Anti capitalist Reagan era economics. Just really sending home the message of like, hey, government sucks.

And we're going to show you that in the form of a delicious dessert that explodes white goo out of people's faces.

So the Audacity, it's pretty high, I think. It's really high, isn't it? They made a movie about a killer dessert.

They did.

And it works.

It works too well, I think.

Too good.

It might work better than it should have.

I think you're right about that. I'm going to. Full blown ted.

Full blown. 10.

Yeah, I loved this.

That's funny. I was gonna say like a seven, but. But we could probably meet in the middle, you know, in between a seven and a ten. A nine, obviously.

Next up is Heart.

This is a tricky one because Larry Cohen is a very cheap man.

Yes, that's true.

To the point that obviously he's not paying for permitting. He's not paying for even sets because he's using his townhouse for multiple sets in all of his movies.

You gotta do what you gotta do. Right.

But Larry Cohen is also, I don't want to say abusing the system.

I mean, I think you could. You could probably say abusing the system.

Yeah, man. But he's also rewriting the system at the same time.

That's true.

And I say that because Larry Cohen used a company called Effects Associates on this movie to do The Stuff. Special effects, right. They did the work for him. They gave him the film, the special effects, and he said, this looks like shit.

I'm only paying you half. And then that was it.

That's how that went down.

They sued him because he put the whole thing in the movie. But all of their work in the.

Movie, all of it, he said it looked like garbage. Paid them half and then used all of it. So obviously they sued him.

They sued him for copyright infringement because he used everything that makes sense. So this went through the whole court of appeals and everything like that. And it's now looked at as a landmark ruling in entertainment law.

That's like one of the foundations of entertainment law today that they call the Yogurt Factory case. And it comes up a lot. That's so funny, because it's the case that established implied consent in any creative.

Endeavor that makes sense. Oh, my God. Yeah.

So basically, you don't need a signed contract in order to fill whatever's there. Even a verbal contract is good enough.

It's basically a way of stopping, like a special effects company from holding your production hostage because they didn't get full anything like payment or something like that. They gave the footage, the film to the creative entity, Larry Cohen here, and received a payment back.

So it was implied that obviously he's going to use this then because you gave it to him. It's implied consent.

They basically said that if there was extras in movies, they could use the counter argument of this implied consent, this yogurt factory ruling, to hold any production hostage because they won't have any signed anything because they don't want to be shown here.

It's why when you're walking around a city and people are filming and there's like a sandwich board that says if you go past this mark, you're going to be on camera. Right.

Implied that. That it comes back to this, the yogurt factory case.

But it's a way of saying that now anything that goes forward that has implied consent has Larry Cohen in mind. This is landmark for the entertainment industry.

So they ruled in favor of Larry Cohen, but I believe the special effects company still retained rights to the footage. Yes.

Everyone won.

Everybody wins. Well, kind of. As long as you could reuse the yogurt factory footage.

Why would you. You don't need to now. It's famous now.

Yeah, but you only got paid half for it.

That's all right. It's a landmark ruling that is still used today.

And it's crazy when you hear the yogurt factory case brought up in other cases, I had to look it up, be like, that's crazy that that's what it's called. But here we are. Implied consent comes directly from The Stuff.

What does that say about the heart, though?

I'm unsure because he did just yoink.

Shots and apparently special effects footage.

Yeah, I'm going eight.

Yeah, eight. I like it. Technical incompetence.

It's not incompetent.

It's really not. I mean, there's some wonky stuff with some green screen footage. It's very obviously superimposed, but for the most part, this thing looks great.

The art direction on this is phenomenal. The Stuff and all the advertising around it is.

It's really good. It stands out so much.

Like, to this day, if that product showed up on the shelves, you'd be like, I would eat that.

Well, it's even to the point that they hired commercial directors to film the in movie commercials just to give it that authentic Feel he knew what he was doing.

Yeah. I mean, he got Abe Vagoda and the where's the Beef lady.

What a combo. We didn't know we needed it, but here we are.

Who knew?

But then he also used practical effects in order to set the scene and really sell it. Like he used a rotating room.

Yeah, it's actually the same room from Nightmare on Elm street where Johnny Depp dies.

It's incredible the way he pulls the stuff off. Like he's a really good filmmaker. It's very annoying.

It's really obvious at the time that that's what's happening in that room, though.

Yeah.

You have actors strapped to the ceiling and you're just like, yeah, they're. They're doing everything they can to hold.

Would you rather them not? This isn't a John Landis movie with a helicopter and small Vietnamese children. They actually care about safety here.

I don't want him to kill anybody, but I mean, make it look believable while you're killing somebody.

I can't knock this movie for being technically incompetent. I can't do it like the editing is garbage. There I found one thing. I did it.

There you go. The editing's not great, but I.

But it makes it feel low budget. It makes like they purposely did it in a way that it makes it feel something that it kind of isn't because it's almost too good.

This movie needs to do worse.

So you're saying something good came out.

Of COVID There's maybe a chance we could get like a director's cut of this stuff.

Oh, my God. Don't tempt me with a good time.

Would be pretty awesome.

This movie is not incompetent. I'm going to go with a 2.

I think that's fair. It's not a full blown 0, but I think a 2 is fair. The next category is low budget ingenuity. And we already know it's big.

Some of the stuff that they very big to save money in this production, right down to the method that a certain high profile politician used for saving money, just not paying your vendors.

It goes even farther than that too, because what they used for this stuff, it might as well be like a McDonald's filet of fish because it was made with fish bones. And apparently it smelled so badly that after they called cut, the actors like, run to the river to just get, like, the smell off of them.

That's wild.

What are you thinking for this one?

Oh, man. It's hard to say because, like, I want to give it a really high score, but I also don't think, like, it's not a crazy low budget, but.

This movie looks like it has a much bigger budget than it actually does. He's being very economical. I understand he's stealing a lot. I get it. But he's.

But that's very annuity, is it not? I think it's got to be really high. Like an eight or a nine.

I'm okay going with a nine. Because I like it, damn it.

Because I like it, damn it.

I. My heart of hearts. I went. It's an eight, obviously. Oh, you like it, damn it.

Oh. But genre exploitation is up next, and. Oh, boy.

I think we started a nine for this one.

Oh, boy. We've hit every single trope of.

Like I said earlier, you have, like, the Blob and Invasion of the Body Snatchers and that kind of horror movie, and they're just checking off every single thing. It's so good.

I'm okay going huge on this one.

Yeah. I think this is a 10.

I'm fine with it. I even tried to be reasonable, and I might have just been, like, unreasonable by going a 9 instead of a 10. You're right. I apologize. Yeah.

Get real, man. This is perfect. Genre exploitation from the master of exploitation, Larry Cohen.

It's true.

Next up, we have the holy trinity. The blood, the boobs, and the booms.

Do we get a two out of three again?

We do get two out of three. We're missing out on the boobs.

We are. It's. I mean, we really got to get those student films back, don't we?

Young, dumb, and full of.

Nope, not money. Low budget ingenuity.

Low budget ingenuity just means shooting more boobs.

It does.

Means you're more easily able to talk the strange kids from the film club into doing things that are questionable in their future that they shouldn't look back on.

Yeah, I was worried that we weren't going to get any blood because of the amount of stuff instead of. Yeah, seemed like everybody had white goo coming out of it instead of blood. But we did get a little.

We got a little bit. There's always a little bit of blood with white when it comes out. Like, there's a little bit.

There's always just a little bit of blood.

Just a tiny bit.

We'll get some real good booms. So I Think this is like a seven?

Yeah, seven.

We round up when we like it.

Yes. If we didn't, when we go to a six and be like, oh, wow, they hated this thing.

That's how you know if we give a six to Meatloaf Math. Holy Trinity. Next up is memorable characters.

I don't think I'm going to remember most of them.

I think you're right. Do we count The Stuff itself as a character? Well, then I think I'm going to remember at least that and chocolate Chip Charlie.

That's very fair. Actually, I'll go with a four. Three.

Okay. Yeah.

Somewhere in that ballpark, I like four.

Because, I mean, I'm gonna remember Mo and his incredible changing accent and the dumb kid with the blue eyes.

That is pretty much everyone in this movie, isn't it?

Yeah. The only one missing really is the lady and the Paul Sorvino. I'll call it a four.

I'm okay with a four.

Quotes.

There's not many, but it's also Michael Moriarty just improving things to keep everyone on their toes.

Like what he says.

High pitched southern accent. Sometimes.

You're not as dumb as you look. Nobody's as dumb as I look.

Very Marx Brothers, kind of. When you like little one liners, there's not too many. I'm gonna go with three.

And it's strictly because the music in this rules and the lyrics are great. That's gotta.

The jingle is. Yeah. Phenomenal. So, yeah, I will accept that. 3. I was gonna go lower, but I forgot about the jingle.

Can't forget about the jingle.

No. How could you? Entertainment value is up next.

And easy 10.

Such an easy 10.

This movie's so good.

It's so much fun.

God damn. Which is why for cult Ability, the final category. I can get behind this movie fully.

I'm there with you. I. I think midnight screens of this would be so much. Especially if you're handing out cups of The Stuff on the way in.

I'm going with a 10 again for cultability. This is phenomenal.

Yeah. It's so good. And that's everything on the Schlockometer. We have a final score before I tell you what that is, Rod. Tomatoes. 68 Critical 50 audience.

Which makes no sense.

No, it doesn't make sense at all.

5.9 On IMDb. A 3.0 on Letterboxd.

What's wrong with people?

So this is a very middling movie for people, I guess, which is crazy to me. But as far as B movie score goes on the Schlockometer. We have given it a 72.

That's up there.

It's high. It feels low.

It does feel low. Why do these things keep feeling low?

I think because we have things like competent directors and not memorable characters and no quotes.

Do worse.

Do worse. If you do worse, you'll get a better score.

But although this one does feel low, I would recommend this to everybody. This is one of the best we've watched so far. I absolutely loved it.

This absolutely gets a high recommendation.

I could go on for so much longer about this. The amount of research that I did into entertainment law is crazy. Yeah, I can give you that's an unexpected.

So many other cases that are landmarks for entertainment law now because of this movie. Because the rabbit hole I went down, it was fascinating.

Sounds like it. That sounds like a. Like a good evening spent on copyright law. Because of The Stuff.

That's it. You watch The Stuff, you. You learn about copyright law, you ignore the kids. Nailed it. Perfect.

All right, what are we talking about in two weeks?

In two weeks, I let the AI know. Hey, you nailed it with The Stuff, my friend. Now you're gonna have to one up that and it said beep, boop, beep, boop. You got it, motherfucker.

Oh, hell yeah. I was just talking about blaxploitation.

I've never seen Dolomite. I've always wanted to see Dolomite. I'm so excited for Dolomite.

I'm super pumped for Dolomite. But until then, be sure to rate, review, subscribe, share, get us more listeners because we want to keep doing this for you guys. We love this.

We love you. We do love you joining us.

Do you think we're not sexy enough?

Is that the problem?

I never know.

Do I have to put on sexy voice to finish this little promo?

I think we just need to put out a poll on Facebook asking if anyone's ever jerked off while listening to our show.

That seems like something I'd rather not know. I'm going to assume, yes, I am too. Come on.

But obviously. But then the real question is, when did you finish?

Now I'm curious. Again, I didn't want to know, but.

Now I do because that definitely would feel like genre exploitation if you finish,.

Like, right, that would feel like exploitation in one way or another. So, yeah, send us an email. B movieboys podmail.com. Tell us when you finished and also join us on Patreon. Oh, patreon.com caped podcasters.

Can we change that?

Yeah. Yeah. I've actually been wanting to change it for a while to patreon.com mcguffinstudios studios that's Mac, like the Burger Guffin, like a muffin.

That's a very fun way of wording anything, and I like that a lot.

That is officially our parent company of all of our conglomerated podcasts now, so you'll find content on there for Kate podcasters, B Movie Boys, Beer Me a Movie, and some other bonus stuff that doesn't quite fit into a category because you can't pigeonhole us.

Can't do it. They keep trying and they can't do it.

Also join us on Discord. There's a link in the show notes to our Discord. You can join us, chat about some of these movies.

We also on Monday night have our Monday midnight movie madness at 10pm because we're adults, we can't be starting movies at midnight on Monday. So we have work on Tuesday.

Do that anymore.

That's a weekend thing. You can't be doing midnight movies on Mondays. So we do 10pm Monday matinee. Sort of matinee.

I mean, like you still got the darkness and the vibes and, you know, hang out with a few people, watch a movie, make some jokey jokes in the chat. It's a good time and we'd love to have you.

All the cool kids are doing it.

And me and Dave.

Exactly. Bryan, you got anything else?

That is it for me.

Fantastic. We're going to see everybody in a couple of weeks when we talk about Dolomite.

But until then, go to a supermarket, knock some stuff off the shelves, go high five a stranger and yell out, good journey.