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Escaping The Narcissist Trauma to Triumph Summit with Marcia Martin
Episode 9819th October 2022 • Empath And The Narcissist: Spiritual Healing from Trauma & Abuse • Raven Scott
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"You're literally spinning, chasing your tail, and the resolution never comes."

We understand it is HARD to escape the Narcissist / Toxic relationship you may be stuck in. Let us be your life line and pull you out, in the Trauma to Triumph Summit on Oct. 30, 9 am pst - 12 pm pst.

Today I share a conversation with Marcia Martin. @mmhearthealer

Follow me DM @ravenscottshow me "free gift" for FREE How to Draw Powerful Boundaries Workshop.

Marcia Martin works Angel's in the sacred Space of the heart to help you heal from past trauma abuse. Who's negative thinking. Encourages you on your journey through meditation's. And offerings to encourage you in heart centered living.

Here are some key moments:

  • Are you loving yourself?
  • Are you self sacrificing at your expense?
  • Are you people pleasing?
  • Is your body in pain? and have stiff body tension, stomach issues?
  • It's not ok to be abused
  • Choosing to leave doesn't make any bad or good. There is no villain truly in the story.
  • If you are still in the relationship, being codependent, neither one of you are able to heal because the toxic patterns are like a drug.
  • You have two lives: one is before you realized you only have one life to live, and the other is when you woke up to the fact that you only have one life to live.

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If I just do. Then we'll be fine. If we just go to therapy, then it'll all be resolved. These all may be signs that you are stuck in a loop with a narcissistic personality. Disordered person, or it just could be on the spectrum. You know, they don't have to be fully diagnosed as N P D, right? Let's just call it toxic. Welcome to the empath and the narcissist podcast. Where you regain your sparkle back after narcissistic abuse.

This is episode

98. Escaping the narcissist. With Dr. Marcia Martin.

Marsha has been a guest on. On our podcast. About a year, maybe year and a half ago. And she shared with us about her Healing. And the angel guides, Marsha Martin works Angel's in the sacred Space of the heart to help you heal from past trauma abuse. Who's negative thinking.

encourages you on your journey through meditation's. And offerings to. Encourage you. I, a heart centered living.

She is such a beautiful. Soul. And when I discovered through the email, I am speaking at the trauma to. The triumphs summit. And she is also Speaker. I was I know her, she was on my podcast. We've always stayed in connection. And she's such a beautiful soul. And a blessing. She really has beautiful intention.

for. People because she and I both have experienced this It's just. Just so debilitating when you're in it, but when you find yourself out. Of it. All you want to do Help and guide People out of it. So I'm really excited to share with you. We created this.

Episode, really like a special for you in. In allowing you to understand. Or maybe tap into. To what you're feeling right Now How. How to get out of it through Through Attending our Conference it really is just like a big motivation And sharing of why you should attend the. the Free you Come for free To triumph summit it's all virtual and if you want to keep all. all of the records of the videos have the Workbook provided as well as have live q and. and a sessions with all of us experts in it And the two self-aware narcissists that are part of the You have all If you want to upgrade it to a vip pass for literally Only 75, Which I think is a phenomenal Cause most vip's are like ninety nine a hundred fifty three. This is only 75. so With all that We will be talking more about that in the episode But just to give you a heads up this Is addressing all of those questions you might be having Or validating Feelings that yes you are In something really thick and no you are not a narcissist yourself and know you are Not really going crazy you just are stuck in his crazy loop that the narcissist has confused You with this is their tactic and their strategy So i look To you listening To this episode and signing up to app To get your free ticket to the summit I know you've already heard that any intro That i've posted in that i've created for the The ad for the summit But it's really all heartfelt it might feel very like ad driven and like oh you know like super motivated like we're not going To give away a bunch of free information because you need to attend it's all coming from the heart And really it is just today is just validating What, Where And your feelings You know we're holding space for you in this episode So i hope you enjoy And i hope to see you at the summit Enjoy and now without Further ado let's get into the conversation


It is not a substitute for professional therapy.

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Welcome everyone. I'm Dr. Marsha Martin, the Heart Healer, and

I , Raven Scott



We're gonna pull you from the deep ocean. Yes,


. Sunday the 30th. To learn, really dive deep into the whole narcissistic phenomena. So I'm gonna give you a couple of questions to start and then Raven's going to come in with some great questions as well. But the thing that I want you to be most aware of, Are you loving yourself?

Does this relationship help you, support you? Do you feel uplifted and acknowledged and honored to be in the relationship? Or do you feel a little belittled and perhaps ashamed and find that you are retreating or hiding more and more? If you are not self-loving, you need to join us on Sunday. During this workshop, we are gonna take a look at why you need to really love yourself, whether you are in or out of a relationship.

And the other thing that I wanna ask you is, do you feel really clear headed? Do you feel that you are able to make really great decisions and you feel really supported and confident in the decisions that you're making? Or are you constantly second guessing yourself? Do you feel a little off all of the time?

If you are in that zone of uncertainty and not feeling clarity about where your life is going or what you can expect next. You might need to tune in and find out whether you've stepped into the narcissistic minefield or if you're just going through sort of a searching phase in your life. It's okay to grow, to search, to learn and expand.

It's not okay to be abused. Yeah, so if you are feeling uncomfortable for any reason, Join us. We want you to move from a space of tragedy into a place of triumph. So Raven, share with us your questions and how you can guide everyone through this place and keep them out .


Are you feeling this constant pit in your stomach? Or maybe you're starting to develop food allergies, which are mysterious and you never had before? That could be a sign that you are in an emotionally abusive relationship because you are ignoring your gut. and you're staying in a situation and now it has to scream at you.

has to get tried to whisper for so long and you've kept pushing it down and pushing it down, and is it screaming at you? Another one is just plain and simple, like, do you feel like you are taking crazy pills? Like do you feel like you are trying and trying and trying with this person? and it's getting nowhere.

You're literally spinning, chasing your tail, and the the, the resolution never comes. The, maybe the apology you're seeking never comes. Maybe it does come, but then it doesn't get followed through. There's no action behind the apology. There's no change in behavior. But you keep saying, Well, if I just do this, then it'll fix it.

If I just do. Then we'll be fine. If we just go to therapy, then it'll all be resolved. These all may be signs that you are stuck in a loop with a narcissistic personality. Disordered person, or it just could be on the spectrum. You know, they don't have to be fully diagnosed as N P D, right? Let's just call it toxic.

You know, like, let's throw out the narcissist thing. Of course we are talking a lot about that, but they just could be toxic and that's all you really need to know. Like Marsha said, are they supporting you emotionally or are you, , always spinning to people please them? Are you walking on eggshells? and if that emotional support is not there, how you can know this is that you may bring up a topic and ask a question for maybe some guidance that you would normally do with a partner, and they twist your head around.

They spin around, they , then turn and ask you questions, or they say, Well, you know what? Your problem. It's like, No, I was just asking for emotional support and guidance. I don't need to know my problems. Like I already know that they're already up in my head. Thank you very much. I don't need to know these problems.

And so then you get more confused and you're spun around like, you know, blindfold, Like you're about to hit a pinata and you're like, I don't know what I, like. I left this conversation a lot more confused than I went into. It's like you have that tiny bit of your own clarity and you're like, Let me just get some support from someone.

And that toxic person is gonna, , have you end up leaving it going, I don't know what is up and what is down, what is left and what is right. You certainly need to join the summit. That's October 30th to find answers, to gain clarity and to gain a support that you, so. because it's like being pulled down a whirlpool, isn't it?

Marsha? Like you need that lifeline. Oh my


Some relationships just aren't good for you, . It doesn't necessarily have to be labeled narcissistic. It's just if you find yourself in a partnership where you don't feel supported, it's not a good place for you to be. And if you feel. The community is missing, then you want to join us because that's what this is all about.

Creating a community of support where you will get answers that you've been seeking, where you can speak freely, where no one is going to say to you, I didn't say that. Or, What are you talking about? Are you always say the stupidest things. That is going to be missing.

We, we know that those conversations really well. Mm-hmm. , and we know how painful they can be and how much they cause you to. Question everything about yourself. If you were a person that began with self-confidence, when you entered the relationship about any area of your life, perhaps you were confident in your approach to your job, but you were a little , wobbly in other areas of your life, by the end of that relationship, you are not.

Going to be confident about the thing that you were confident about going in. All of your confidence is gonna be stripped away, and that one thing that you were holding onto that made you feel like you had a handle on your life is gonna be gone. So if you feel like you're sort of falling into this abyss and everything that you are doing is turning out badly.

Please join us. It's not you. You have made a choice that isn't honoring your highest good, and we wanna help you find the way forward from here it is. Not the easiest thing you're ever gonna do, but we are here to support you, and we want to make sure that the advice that you are receiving during this summit comes from the heart and is not going to point fingers or blame other people.

It's going to help you be uplifted so that you can make the best decision for yourself. . So absolutely. Raven, tell us how you got to the place that you realized, Whoa. This isn't working. , I, I'm absolutely just not food allergies. It's like allergic to life, .


I was just allergic to my ex. I was just allergic to the abuse. And that's really the truth about it. In a weird, funny, simplistic way. , I was isolated. , this is the other thing that they do, and I really truly feel like if you are resonating with any of this, then you're going to find that having a group community setting like this summit is really powerful and is very transformative because you will feel the light and love from the community versus, you know what you're feeling now, you're feeling alone and you're feeling empty and lost like you're in this cold.

Icy cave, you know, emotionally and in your psyche. And we, we both have been there, right, Marsha? We both have been in that icy cave and


Your best partner, and it doesn't mean that that partner is evil or that they are just someone that is always bad. Expect that each one of these people that you have partnered with that hasn't been your greatest match, have good qualities and our good people. However, the combination of both of you isn't working.

So don't look to the other person to be all of the problem . Expect that you are going to have your own, , role in this as well. Yeah. But know that while you remain in this toxic relationship, it's going to be very difficult for you to do your own personal growth work or for them to be able to do their personal growth work.

So choosing to leave doesn't mean they're bad and you're good, or . You are bad and they're good. It just isn't healthy for either one of you to be in this place. So we wanna encourage you and support you in choosing to come be spend time with us on the 30th, where you are gonna commune with people who have done the work, have gotten it out of the relationships.

Are now dedicating their lives to helping others get out of the relationship. Mm-hmm. . But we didn't do it by pointing fingers at the other person and saying, Oh, you're such a terrible person. We did it by doing just what we wanna do with you on the 30th, getting support for our own personal wellbeing.


Yes. And then, you know, in doing so, it just. It didn't work out because then a few other demons kind of came out and he tried to get back at me by cheating on me. And so again, like he just kept crossing the lines for me that were like, That's it. So I was like, Okay, I can't continue to try. Like that's my line.

You don't tow over and I'm gonna file for a divorce and wish you well. Um, and yes, that is part of the grieving process is feeling like you need to villainize. I feel like for a tiny bit that's fine to make sure you don't go back to them, but like you said, realize that they are human, they have their wounds, they have their trauma.

And if they want to grow and fix them, that's great, but that's their journey. And unfortunately in a toxic relationship, , the two combinations of either your energies, you are attracted to each other to kind of fill in those different wounds. If you're still there, you can't actually heal the wounds cuz you're filling the wounds for each other and enabling through codependency, , those wounds.

And so he, you know, he or she can't heal. You can't heal. By ignoring them and being the bandaid for each other. So my journey of realizing that I needed to, , start to stand up for myself before I even realized I needed to leave is I went to community. I went to a family member's. Who had a whole bunch, like all my cousins and their kids, and it felt like I said, I felt the love, I felt the light, and it just felt really peaceful, which I hadn't felt in years.

And when I came back to share like how wonderful it felt, He just immediately went straight into their horrible people, their baby breeders. They're ruining the earth. And I'm like, You're not hearing me at all. I'm not even trying to convince you to have a child. I just am expressing my experience. And he couldn't receive or hear that.

And that was my first big awakening step to, he's never gonna change for me in, in my relationship in that circumstance. Well, I think


So if you are hoping that you can fix them, Please join us if you, if you are having the conversation with yourself. Oh, I know. If I just do what he says or she says more often, this will get better if I just, , become less so they can become more, I'll only have to do that for a short time and then they'll be so grateful that.


He didn't say this. I'm kind of like gleaning all my information from my other interviews as well, but is like a drug. And so if you are the drug in that relationship to them, can , an addict ever be free and grow and heal if the drug is sitting right next to their bedside table every night? No. They just can't help themselves.

Like that's just what happens. So I'm not like insulting you or calling you a drug. What I'm saying is, If you let them treat you that way, you are enabling that and you are like that addictive high for them. And the only way for them to even awaken, possibly to change is to draw the boundaries and not continue to give them that to enable that.

And maybe they will, maybe they won't. You don't have to keep putting up with that just to hope and pray that they change while you're there, cuz he never will if that's already the symptom already in place in the patterns.


Yeah. And you. It probably is gonna hurt to see that. All we can tell you is we've been there and we've come back from that place, and we'll support you in stepping out of that place and stepping back into your authenticity. But, You continuing to play small, hoping that they're at some point going to be big enough so that they're, they'll be able to include you, is just a fantasy.

And , the quicker that you get out of of that, the better it is for both parties. You are probably much healthier than the narcissist. Even though you have made these poor decisions and you have diminished yourself, I'm going to still believe that you are healthier emotionally than your narcissistic counterpart.


What I've said is that. When you stay and you put up with this abuse like you think, and they make you think that you're weak, but you're a hell-a strong, you are. I mean, to put up with that over and over and then suck it up and be like, Okay, let's like prepare the lunches and let's do all the normal things that you have to do as a person in the world, or Let me get up early and go to lunch even though I'm hungover and placid.

Let's just continue on to put on that face in society. You are incredibly strong and you are not worth having to put up with that treatment. So if number one, you're strong. You can do anything you desire, like you have the strength within you. So there's no need to stay because you don't deserve it.

You're not worth it. So you, you can, you're brave enough, you just gotta muster up your inner goddess .



The lifesaver buoy. We are the buoy. Just grab on, hold on tight and you won't be sucked down into that Vortex . Hey,



AM to:

So I just wanted to cover real quick before we end, here's what's going on to be covered in these virtual online summit. You don't have to go anywhere. You can sit in your PJs. It's all over the video. This is what we're gonna cover, is how to break free from trauma bond, how to guard against negative energy and dispel the narcissist.

I'll be hosting that and a little mini guided meditation. How to have complete freedom from the narcissist and change your story so that you can change your life. How the narcissist used love to manipulate you. That's probably one of from one of the self-aware narcissists and why MPA attract narcissists and what you can do about it.

That's hosted by Dr. Marsha Martin herself, and confessions into the mind of a narciss. , That's definitely from another, a self-aware narcissist host. How you can use the power of your words to heal and how domestic violence with the narcissist begins within this summit will be jam packed with real interviews, like I said, with all of us survivors and coaches, and the self-aware narcissist.

And really we're gonna share with you in being community of how to overcome narcissistic abuse. So there's one last question. That we wanna ask. So what would it be worth to you to be able to sit with five top narcissist experts, including ourselves and two top self-aware narcissists who are crushing it in the narc awareness community such as Lisa Sonny, Leon Walker, Ben Taylor, uh, myself, Dr.

Marsha Martin, and more like how much would that be worth? It's priceless, I think because I wish I had a community like what we're creating when I was coming out of it. I didn't even know it was called narcissism. I didn't even know I was codependent. I just knew I was going crazy and that's it.




Take the initiative, join us on the 30th, and get the information and the support that you need to break the cycle.


I can certainly attest that that was, feels like a whole different life away from my life now, which is a second. You realize you only have one life to live. So like Marsha keeps saying, the more time you stay, the more deep you get sucked into the quick sand. So life is too short, life is too precious, and this this really is going to help benefit you and you


I'm gonna tell you right now, and so do they. They deserve better, so don't do it just for yourself. If you're feeling so broken and defeated, do it for you, for your partner, for your children, if you have children, be, be who you really are and. That little bit of time to learning how you can break free and live a life that really feels great.

So we'll see you on the 30th and we're excited to be able to share the journey with you and be your support system.


Like I am ready to get out and definitely grab your v i p ticket, you will get, , exclusive q and a session times with all of. Plus the two self-aware narcissists and it's just a beautiful tool at an incredible, incredible price. $75 only for the v i p. Like it's amazing. So, and I gotta


I had to. Hear it again and again and again. Read books, go to different places. It, it took me a really long time to comprehend that this relationship was never going to work because I was so deeply invested. So I would really recommend. That you go ahead and get that v i p pass so that you will have something that you can refer back to and you will be able to remind yourself.

There's no way to go forward. in the direction that I'm going, and you will not keep investing more and more of your life into something that has no hope of becoming what you want it to be.


And he was becoming more and more resentful. So he is becoming more and more abusive because I was trying to shove him in to that. And then with through his resentment behind that, this is what Leon made me aware of, which you can ask in this VIP ticket, the questions I was like, I was talking and he.

Commenting back and asking him, and I was like, I, I forced mine to into a marriage. He resented me. Yeah. He's like, Yes, he resented you. And he did not like that. And therefore it opened up a wound for him from his childhood of like, If she leaves me now, I'm really gonna be abandoned. And that was his big thing, abandonment wound.

And when I had to, because it was getting more and more abusive, it was like a self-fulfilling prophecy. His fear and. You know, resentment then forced me to leave and therefore I abandoned him. And therefore, hearing through the grapevine, he, he actually like, physically got worse and declined before.

Hopefully he's now better, but I don't know cuz I have no contact. But, so all of those videos you get in a v I p with the questions, the q and a session, the videos, , come with a VIP so you'll have them for a lifetime to re replay. Have them be the new mantra in your mind instead of the narrative that the narcissist is spinning on you.

And then you'll be ready. You'll be ready to rise up, ready to leave, and ready to live your life, your one and only life. What a


And then make the decision that is not just for your highest good, but for the highest good of everyone is that's in this relationship with you.





No matter what, it's


When I was your age, , I didn't know. I had no idea. I. Yeah, like I said, I just thought I was upside down. Topsy turvy, ,


we will not come at you with any kind of judgment or condemnation, not because we're perfect, but because we've been there and we understand what you're going through and how difficult and confusing it is. Mm-hmm. absolutely.



We are gonna do our best to bring you everything you could possibly need to make the best decision for yourself, and we are delighted that you're gonna be with us and you are gonna be delighted as well.

We look forward to helping you and supporting you in. These beautiful and transformative times.


See you next episode.

If you are enjoying this podcast, subscribe. And leave a rate and review Madhvi is helping people release Baggage breaking negative patterns and finding the root causes with the emotion and body code. Visit www dot Madhvi dot CA. That's M a D H V I dot. Dot CA. I can personally attest that this is an amazing way to heal trauma out that you can't do with meditation. And.

Thought therapy and talk therapy and all the things. So. Reach out to her and A free 30 minute consultation to see if That can help you.