This week on 5 Random Questions, podcaster and improv comedian Kevin Ryan expands on why Santa needs to be kidnapped, why his fiancee would go to war with Australia, his beef with elephants, and more.

Answering the questions this week: Kevin Ryan

I'm Kevin Ryan I'm the host of the Tyrant In Training podcast which is an improv comedy podcast where creative guests live out their power fantasys Every week, Kevin is joined by a new guest to find out exactly what kind of absolute ruler they’d be if they were given total control of their very own country. Kevin is also a regular on the actual play Alien RPG podcast Facehuggers and Friends as the chain smoking, dedicated employee of Weyland-Yutani Tamura Lucky Saburo Finally, Kevin is the spirit human to most animals

Kevin's Website

@kevryanperson on Instagram

Kevin on YouTube

Further reading for this episode

• Facehuggers and Friends: An Alien RPG | Podcast on Spotify
• Balderdash The Hilarious Bluffing Game 1995 Edition, Board Games
• Shen Yun Official Site
• Welcome to The Friendship Bench | raising awareness around youth mental health
• Meta and YouTube found liable in social media addiction trial
• The Tragically Hip
• Runrig | Official Website
• Aslan - Instagram
• Roachford Cuddly Toy Original Video - YouTube
• Aqua - Doctor Jones - YouTube
• Elon Musk new haircut - Who's gonna tell him : r/Productivitycafe on Reddit
• Michael D. Higgins | Biography, Facts, Party, & Age | Britannica
• Dumb-Dumbs and Dice | An Actual Play D&D Podcast and TTRPG Network

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Kevin: Some people like to have pillow fights with other countries instead of full-on wars.

Kevin: I know my fiancée was a guest and she wanted to go to war with Australia because

Kevin: while we were there, we noticed that in the shopping centres nobody was putting

Kevin: the trolleys back in the bays,

Kevin: which is just quite frankly very rude. You should do that for God's sake. What are you doing?

Kevin: So she started a war with them.

Danny: Hi, and welcome to 5 Random Questions, the show with unexpected questions and unfiltered answers.

Danny: I'm your host, Danny Brown, and each week I'll be asking my guests five questions

Danny: created by a random question generator.

Danny: The guest has no idea what the questions are, and neither do I,

Danny: which means this could go either way.

Danny: So sit back, relax, and let's dive into this week's episode.

Danny: Today's guest is Kevin Ryan. Kevin is the host of the Tyrant in Training podcast

Danny: which is an improv comedy podcast where creative guests live out their power fantasies Every week,

Danny: Kevin is joined by a new guest to find out exactly what kind of absolute ruler

Danny: they'd be if they were given total control of their very own country

Danny: Kevin is also regular on the actual play Alien RPG podcast Facehuggers and Friends

Danny: as a chain-smoking, dedicated employee of Weyland-Yutani Tamura Lucky Saburo.

Danny: Kevin is also the spirit human to most animals. So, Kevin, welcome to 5 Random Questions.

Kevin: Hello, how are you? Hi, Danny. Thank you very much for having me on.

Danny: You're very welcome. And as our listeners can probably hear,

Danny: you've got a lovely Irish tilt there.

Danny: So this is going to be an interesting conversation between an Irishman and a

Danny: Scotsman. There's a joke lined up there somewhere.

Danny: And I mentioned, obviously, you're the host of the Tyrant in Training podcast,

Danny: and that's got over 100 episodes now.

Danny: So of these episodes, is there a favourite power grab from one of your guests on these episodes?

Kevin: Is there a favourite power grab? So what I,

Kevin: the first, I'll say the first 40 or so episodes,

Kevin: I used to have a question where I'd ask someone, um if

Kevin: there was world war three tomorrow but the un decided every country

Kevin: had to go to war with another country just to be

Kevin: fair right every country had to pick one what country would you go to war with

Kevin: and why that's you know it's a light entertainment podcast so people were very

Kevin: nice and silly about it um some people like to have pillow fights with other

Kevin: countries instead of full-on wars.

Kevin: I know my fiancé was a guest and she wanted to go to war with Australia because

Kevin: while we were there, we noticed that in the shopping centres,

Kevin: nobody was putting the trolleys back in the bays.

Kevin: Which it's just quite frankly very rude. You should do that for God's sake.

Kevin: So she started a war with them. And her first tactical move was to effectively

Kevin: kidnap all of the Santa Clauses who are working close to Christmas.

Kevin: Now, I don't think she realized that she was ruining Christmas for children.

Kevin: And that was a bit unfortunate. But yeah, I like stuff like that.

Kevin: I know the recent, I had a recent episode with Ryan LaPlante.

Kevin: He's a fellow podcaster who is part of Dumb Dumbs and Dice.

Kevin: They're a group who have loads of podcasts. Dumb Dumbs and Dragons is one of

Kevin: their podcasts. They run weekly.

Kevin: And he was very adamant that he's actually, sorry, he's Canadian as well. My God.

Kevin: And he was very adamant that he was going to set up a country near Canada.

Kevin: He was going to call it Canada 2.

Kevin: And he wanted to take over the world. So we did a lot of, we used D100 dice in that to help him.

Kevin: He got as far as taking over two countries.

Kevin: If you want to listen to it to find out how far he got in control of the world.

Kevin: But yeah, people, I think, realize that it's hard to take over an entire world

Kevin: or just another country when they have their own country collapsing on them.

Danny: Well, it's funny. It's not funny. It's interesting that if you look at today's

Danny: geopolitical stuff, a lot of that's happening, right?

Danny: And the leaders of these countries find it's not quite as easy.

Danny: It's just going and saying, okay, you're coming out. You're not doing this anymore.

Danny: So, yeah, we should probably get some leaders onto these kind of podcasts.

Kevin: I thought about getting, so we have an Irish president.

Kevin: People might know the Irish president we used to have because he looked like

Kevin: Bilbo Baggins when he was in Rivendell.

Kevin: Old hobbit sort of character uh michael d

Kevin: higgins and when he retired so when he was in his term was finished up i did

Kevin: think should i try and get him onto the podcast very nice old man but yeah i

Kevin: have thought about do i get politicians because you know i don't try and catch

Kevin: people out on it it's a silly light entertainment podcast but yeah maybe i'll

Kevin: try get get someone on that'd.

Danny: Be good that would be good and as i mentioned um you also say that you're a

Danny: spirit human to most animals most in quotation marks which ones don't make the list?

Kevin: I used to say elephants. I don't know. I always got a bad vibe off elephants,

Kevin: although the last few times I've gone and seen them, and they're kind of cute, to be honest.

Kevin: I'm trying to think, what animals don't I?

Kevin: When I think spirit animals, I know drafts love me. You know what I mean?

Kevin: It's just I could go through every single experience I've had with them,

Kevin: but every time I've gone to either a zoo or wildlife sanctuary or park or whatever,

Kevin: as soon as I look over at a draft, they'll run over to me, bow their heads,

Kevin: And I'm like, hello, guys.

Kevin: If I pull out a camera and I say, hey, do you mind? They'll all stare.

Kevin: So I'm definitely spirit human to them. I have three cats here.

Kevin: I think I'm their spirit human.

Kevin: But yeah, no, I think when I say I'm a spirit human to most animals,

Kevin: it doesn't mean the animals that I'm not a spirit human to, I'm like at war

Kevin: with them. No, they're fine.

Danny: Yeah, yeah, they're all good. They're not coming on the podcast to,

Danny: you know, take over animal countries or whatever.

Kevin: No, no, no, no, no. But, yeah, no, no, no. I think I'm willing to let any animal live.

Danny: Yeah. Well, yeah, exactly. And I love it about giraffes, because giraffes,

Danny: like you say, they're very unique animals, like that big old neck and having

Danny: the big long tongue that they've got.

Danny: So that's cool that they kind of veer towards you whenever you're nearby. That's pretty cool.

Kevin: Yeah. I don't really have a long

Kevin: neck, so I don't really know what that's about. And I have fed a rhino.

Kevin: Rhinos are big, silly cows. They're great.

Danny: And their horns. Are they big horns? They always look big because they're pretty big animals.

Kevin: I'm trying to remember when we went and saw them and then we were able to feed them,

Kevin: Was it something behind her ear or something? That was what,

Kevin: besides the horn itself, but that's what poachers were looking for.

Kevin: Something behind her ear as well, I think.

Kevin: But no, God, we got some carrots cut up and we had to put out our hand.

Kevin: The rhino comes over and just, I'd say chomps down.

Kevin: My hand was absolutely fine. I still have it. And they just pull back and you

Kevin: can just feel a big slimy mouth just taking the carrots away.

Kevin: And you're like oh they're happy out they're lovely yeah.

Danny: I'd love to try that you know i love animals like you and to have something

Danny: like that happen that'd be super cool so i'm

Kevin: Very jealous very.

Danny: Jealous of you there mate well what we will try to do is not take over any countries

Danny: but we will try to give you five fun entertaining questions today so kevin are

Danny: you ready to jump into the random question hot seat

Kevin: I was born ready which is a great reason for my parents to conceive i.

Danny: Like it all right so i'm just going to bring up the random question generator

Danny: all right yeah okay question number one would you rather age from the neck up

Danny: only or the neck down only

Kevin: I would say so age

Kevin: only from the neck up or neck down i'd have

Kevin: to go neck up so just my head ages yeah

Kevin: because i think i'm aging quite well i

Kevin: mean i'm i mean there's an only audio

Kevin: podcast but i'm 38 and i'm looking great like that's

Kevin: how i'm convinced like i'm the same age as conor mcgregor now i know he has

Kevin: a lot of money so that's you know that's fine but i've seen him and i'm like

Kevin: i look much better like i know he's in shape from the neck down i'm not i'm

Kevin: not i There's no competition. I'm not claiming. Writing from the neck up.

Kevin: Do you know when, God, what was it? Was it the Masters or the US Open or something like that?

Kevin: You had, that was on a couple of months ago, and Rory McIlroy won it.

Kevin: And the big thing was, I don't know, are you much into golf?

Danny: I'll follow them again, the big ones like that. So I know the players and stuff, yeah.

Kevin: You know, there was a big deal with Rory McIlroy because if he won this tournament,

Kevin: he would complete the set, right? He'd won every major.

Kevin: So a lot of pressure on him. i remember he got to the 18th and i think he might

Kevin: have been in the lead or he was tying,

Kevin: very pressure-filled situation right and i was watching it going this is brilliant,

Kevin: and it got to like the 16 17 hole and the camera zoomed in on him and the amount

Kevin: of stress that man was under joyful for him that we were that he won that's

Kevin: that's great news but i was as soon as i did that i was like,

Kevin: He's the same age as me as well. And I look so much better.

Danny: Well, and that's it, right? I mean, you mentioned Conor McGregor there.

Danny: Yeah, he looks a lot older than you, mate. So, kudos to your skincare treatment.

Danny: But to Roderick McIlroy, I feel stressed. Obviously, it does age you.

Danny: We were talking before we started recording.

Danny: We were in the green room just talking football for like 25,

Danny: you know, soccer for 20, 25 minutes or so.

Danny: And we're speaking about managers. And the pressure these guys face,

Danny: you can tell the difference between when they join a club and they're fresh-faced,

Danny: ready to go, and then leave a club and they're haggard and they're worry-lines.

Danny: I feel like stress is a big equaliser when it comes to age anyway.

Kevin: It has to be some sort of vanity or something. I didn't think I was a vain person

Kevin: in this way. But like, at least in the last year, I found myself like looking

Kevin: at like a list of celebrities who were born the same year as me,

Kevin: going, look better than them, look better than them.

Kevin: I want to say someone like Michael B. Jordan might be the same age as me.

Kevin: I could be wrong on that, but I'd get to like Michael B.

Kevin: Jordan and go, all right, he looks great. I'll move along.

Kevin: But yeah, it has to be, again, it makes sense, at least with the Rory McIlroy one has to be stress.

Kevin: So yeah, I'd definitely go down. I need to be as young as I can.

Danny: Well nobody cares about you down right unless you're on the beach and

Danny: you're trying to show off or whatever but i mean i think

Danny: as well like you're uh improv um you you

Danny: like to laugh you like to have light entertainment i feel that helps a lot too

Danny: it's like the sort of flip side to stress it i feel people that laugh more yes

Danny: you get crow's feet little laughter lines around your eyes but i feel people

Danny: that laugh more look younger because

Danny: they enjoy life more right and And there's less to put age onto you.

Kevin: Mel Brooks is what? He'd be 180, you know?

Danny: No, he's got to be at least of a day.

Kevin: I remember he was at last year. There was a video I seen where he was up on

Kevin: stage at some function, right?

Kevin: It was like they showed Spaceballs and then he came up for a chat.

Kevin: You know that sort of thing, right?

Kevin: And it was a video where he was talking about when he was younger,

Kevin: when he was like a weight or one of his first jobs or something like that.

Kevin: And he was telling this joke at whatever age he actually is,

Kevin: like 98 or something. Right.

Kevin: And he was walking around the stage like a stand up, like, you know,

Kevin: confidently like talk. And obviously he'd have the experience to do that.

Kevin: And he told this joke. And I mean, it wasn't it wasn't hilarious.

Kevin: Right. It wasn't something I wasn't roaring, laughing at it.

Kevin: But you could see the mechanics of that joke and it

Kevin: was like yeah it's a nice little little joke right and i

Kevin: was thinking he's nearly 100 and he's still able to tell a joke like like a

Kevin: tell an anecdote that's funny and i was like that has to be no wonder why he's

Kevin: living so so long like car reiner was another one who lived into his 90s and

Kevin: yeah there was someone else i could i can't remember look.

Danny: At dick van dyke he's what 104 or something 102 or something he's like he's right up there

Kevin: So i'm wondering is comedy the way to to grow old well.

Danny: If you laugh you like that what's the saying if you if you laugh the word laughs

Danny: with you or something um there's like an old famous saying i can't remember

Danny: it's like sorry i'm paraphrasing there but somewhere along the lines of do do

Danny: do the lot the word laughs with you and i feel if you yeah i feel if you laugh

Danny: you're a happier soul generally

Kevin: And that's why i'm thinking if i'm right along those lines which seems to make

Kevin: sense if you're a happy person you're whatever chemical in your body is releasing

Kevin: and you're great and there's not as much stress or whatever.

Kevin: If Dick Van Dyke is living past 100 because he's a funny guy and so is Mel Brooks and the like,

Kevin: Elon Musk only must have, like, a few weeks left.

Danny: Yeah. And he's a weird one. You know, like...

Kevin: He's just not funny. No. Just doing it horrendously.

Danny: Oh, his new haircut is pretty funny. I don't know if you've seen that.

Danny: Maybe he's, like, posting that or something.

Kevin: Is this with the moustache as well?

Danny: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, I've seen that,

Kevin: Yeah.

Danny: He's looking like a little Mussolini or something.

Kevin: A little bit, yeah.

Danny: I don't know. He's a strange fellow, though.

Kevin: Definitely strange. He's a terribly unfunny person. That's the thing that really gets me about him.

Kevin: Whatever about the other views, we're into that. but he

Kevin: tries to tell so many jokes and they're never funny and i'm like you would even

Kevin: by accident you would tell a funny joke if you're doing that many so yeah no

Kevin: i i'm i don't know can i get on to polymarket and bet that he's not lasting

Kevin: another five years unless he tells a pun um.

Danny: Yeah yeah well that's the thing maybe that's like the lewis and ellen about

Danny: the taking over the world and what have you just maybe a laugh that all sort

Danny: of clean the world up you And in 10, 20 years'

Danny: time, it will be a better place. We can only hope. We can only hope, mate.

Danny: But I feel that was a nice way to start your time in the question hot seat.

Danny: So on that note, let's have a look at what question number two brings up.

Danny: Yeah, this has been up before, I feel, but I always like a music question.

Danny: So question two, Kevin. What is your favourite song of all time?

Kevin: So I will say I am quite... What's the word?

Kevin: I'm a caveman when it comes to music. I feel like at a certain point in life,

Kevin: I decided I would either go to movies or music and really like get interested.

Kevin: And I went movies, but music, what really favorite song of all time?

Kevin: This isn't my favorite song of all time, but there was something that happened

Kevin: a few weeks ago, which did actually happen, where I got into my car, and I was quite down.

Kevin: Speaking of laughing and staying stressed, I was either stressed or I was just

Kevin: down, as you will be, or I don't want to say depressed, it might be a bit harsh.

Kevin: But yeah, I wasn't in a good mood anyway.

Kevin: And I got into the car, I had to drive, I had to go off and do something.

Kevin: And i turned on the car and the radio i believe came on itself right and as soon as it came on,

Kevin: that song that you might have heard in years uh dr jones by aqua.

Danny: Oh yeah yeah yeah

Kevin: Burst out of the stereo really loud and

Kevin: like because i was a bit shocked of like what the hell's going on

Kevin: here i did it took me a minute to do anything

Kevin: and then i was like what song is that

Kevin: and i was like oh is that uh so i wanted to wait a few

Kevin: seconds to make sure is that dr jones whatever and i think it actually did cheer

Kevin: me up i left it on going oh why not and that actually cheered me up for today

Kevin: i was like what a weird thing to happen the universe decide but my favorite song of all time,

Kevin: Oh, my God. The one that comes to mind, because I think I've been listening to it a lot on Spotify,

Kevin: is that song by R.E.M. That's very fast. See, I'm really bad with...

Danny: Is it End of the World?

Kevin: That's the one. Yeah.

Danny: I don't even know if that's a proper title, but that's the basic gesture.

Danny: It's End of the World. End of the World.

Kevin: Yeah, yeah. I mean, there's other... Like, my fiancé often laughs at me because

Kevin: she says most of my musical taste came from Scrubs when the TV show was running originally.

Kevin: And now that it's back, I'll probably get new music I'll like.

Kevin: But, yeah, anything out of Scrubs was always sticking to me.

Kevin: I'm very, what's that song, Rocheford?

Kevin: It was in Alan Partridge. It's when he's driving to work.

Kevin: Cuddly Toy. That's to work. That's to him. Yeah, I quite like that.

Kevin: Those are the songs that are coming to mind.

Danny: What's funny, I like some TV shows. I find a lot of TV shows do have awesome

Danny: soundtracks. I never really watched Grey's Anatomy, but my wife did.

Danny: And some of the music that came out, that's how I got into Brandy Carlyle,

Danny: for example, where her song was playing on the story.

Danny: And then you look, let's see, you've got Scrubs. I think the

Danny: what one am I listening to I think The Boys has got an amazing soundtrack at

Danny: times so yeah I can see songs coming out from TVs and you mentioned Aqua this

Danny: bubblegum pop is going to make you smile

Danny: Barbie Doll, I love it so Aqua is one of these sort of pop bands that would

Danny: always make you smile but

Danny: you're from Ireland and I feel a lot of Scotland as well has got a lot of classic,

Danny: good music coming from it.

Danny: You've got, maybe not classic, but certainly Johnny Logan won the Eurovision Song Contest twice.

Danny: But you've got some amazing musicians coming out of Ireland.

Danny: So it's always interesting to hear someone like your soundmate say,

Danny: well I'm more into films as opposed to music but I get that as well.

Kevin: Even when you say about Ireland, the first band that came to mind then was Aslan

Kevin: which people outside Ireland, kind of maybe, probably did well in Scotland as

Kevin: well, that they're, as someone used to say that, like...

Kevin: When someone would say, I don't know who Aslan are, they'd go,

Kevin: Aslan are in Ireland, what you two are outside of Ireland.

Kevin: Like, that's how big they are. Like, Aslan are the big band in Ireland that you two aren't.

Kevin: And then outside of Ireland, everyone's like, oh, you two, that's the band that,

Kevin: you know. Yeah, what's his name? Christy.

Kevin: Can't remember his second name, the singer. But yeah, he had a fantastic voice.

Kevin: So yeah, any of his songs or Aslan's songs would come to mind as well.

Danny: Yeah what's kind of like it's funny you mentioned scotland and that that

Danny: comparison between u2 and aslan i guess in scotland

Danny: it'd be like uh simple minds would be our big one like our

Danny: u2 i guess everybody knows him but then you've got run rig who'd be similar

Danny: to aslan like everyone in scotland knows who run rig is um but outside not so

Danny: much it's like canada like you've got the um the tragically hip very huge canadian

Danny: band but very few people outside canada know who the hip are I

Kevin: Don't know why that really appeals to me though the fact that,

Kevin: Not that, I'm sure any of them, if you ask them, do you want to be a major hit

Kevin: in every country in the world, they'd go, sure, that'll do me.

Kevin: But the fact that they're not even local, because it's their country,

Kevin: but the fact that they're so embedded in their country, I just think that's

Kevin: really nice. I quite like that as opposed to international superstars.

Danny: Yeah, exactly. It's almost like your little secret, right? I know when Gordie

Danny: Howe, the lead singer of the hip, died, he had a brain cancer and he died a few years back.

Danny: The whole country, essentially, I never got into the hip, but that's because I'm not Canadian.

Danny: I enjoyed some of their songs, but I never saw the appeal of the everyday Canadian, how they revered him.

Danny: But when Gordie Howe died, basically the whole country mourned.

Danny: The Prime Minister went to the funeral, made a speech. It was so weird.

Danny: For a band that no one else really hears of outside Canada.

Kevin: Yeah, yeah.

Danny: But that's music that is music it's all global it's all good but i i like that

Danny: i like the fact that you know you you're a bubble cup bubble bubble gum pop

Danny: song as the one you know that you kind of went straight to so i like that's

Danny: why i like the show like it's so random i

Kevin: Was sitting crying in my car and doing aqua came on.

Danny: Perfect perfect you need to write to them get them on your podcast mate and

Danny: just you know as a way of thanking them just say okay it's your turn now what

Danny: country you're going to take over.

Danny: But I like that. Aqua. Perfect.

Danny: On that note then, let's move on and have a look at what question number three is.

Danny: Question for you, Kevin. What three adjectives would you use to describe yourself?

Kevin: I used to think alpha, but okay. No, we'll not. I'll just make clear.

Danny: From the head up.

Kevin: From the head up. Alpha.

Kevin: I probably would now say quirky because, well, you know what?

Kevin: Listen either to the Facebook friends or the Tyrant in training.

Kevin: But yeah quirky is a nice way to say harmlessly weird right i.

Danny: Like quirky yep

Kevin: Quirky's nice and like i i guess because i'm i'm listening to or i'm watching

Kevin: a lot of stand-up comedians because i might go in down that route as well myself

Kevin: so there's a lot of them like james acaster or bo burnham that i just gravitate

Kevin: towards more maybe even stewart lee even though i'd be a bit,

Kevin: a little bit different but um i guess i'd class them as being quirky as well that'd be one um,

Kevin: i'd say either energetic or i'd say productive but the thing about wanting to

Kevin: be productive is then you end the day and you're like i haven't been productive

Kevin: enough so maybe one or them because i do tend to do a lot like when i finish

Kevin: this recording i'd probably sit here and go,

Kevin: okay i better start writing i do a blog on medium that's like an immersive rpg blog blah blah and,

Kevin: i'll either do that or i'll continue writing a book that i want to get finished

Kevin: or i'll start writing jokes or i'll have to do something do you know what i

Kevin: mean so that could be adhd um so i'll say energetic and quirky as two.

Kevin: And then third one, what would I describe myself?

Kevin: Okay, well, the first word that came to mind there was scattergun,

Kevin: because I tend to talk one topic and then remind myself of a second one and

Kevin: go, actually, I should tell you about this, and I'll come back to that first topic later.

Kevin: Very, very scattergun approach to talking.

Kevin: That's why we were saying that we were talking about soccer for 20 minutes before

Kevin: we got onto this. We were like, we better start recording.

Kevin: I've done my podcast and you

Kevin: know it's about an hour long maybe an hour maybe an hour

Kevin: and a half depending and there was one guest i had

Kevin: on and i asked her is she you know does

Kevin: she have an hour does she have an hour and a half i want to respect her time

Kevin: and she said no i'm good

Kevin: she's in vegas so she said it's 11 a.m here i have

Kevin: a phone call at 2 p.m but no

Kevin: offense i don't talk to you for three hours naturally so like

Kevin: that's great no problem at all and we end up talking for two hours

Kevin: 45 minutes because she is chatty as

Kevin: well and as you can tell that can get problematic

Kevin: if both people are constantly talking so yeah i'm maybe chatty but i don't feel

Kevin: like that does me justice of i will continuously go on and on and on so while

Kevin: we go with quirky i'll say energetic and sort of a need to do something more and,

Kevin: either chatty or john i'm going to change that to quick because i can fill a silence.

Danny: Well i think all three of them together though are perfect you mentioned there

Danny: you know you're thinking going into the the comedy you know route um you're

Danny: you know you're ruled off three

Danny: comedians that you you feel match you know

Danny: your quirkiness and i feel quirky energetic and

Danny: certainly when you mentioned scatterbrain there um but you know

Danny: quick they're all perfect for comedians because

Danny: you do have to obviously you know think on your feet and

Danny: you know adapt to the crowd and do crowd work and i

Danny: feel maybe billy connelly was one of the when you

Danny: think he's scatterbrain for me he was one of the very best

Danny: uh he still is he's alive sorry billy have you

Danny: listened to this podcast like i know you do religiously um

Danny: but he was always someone that would all like when he was on doing his stand-up

Danny: days he'd he'd start a story and he'd go on 10 different variants and then 40

Danny: minutes later come back oh do you remember by the way we were speaking about

Danny: this and he just brought it all the way back in which i loved about him i

Kevin: Love i love and and something that i really like now the more i'm doing like

Kevin: joke writing and trying to like write five minutes of stand-up material and

Kevin: stuff like this i love i've always loved callbacks,

Kevin: where any stand-up will talk about something and then come back to it 20 minutes

Kevin: later or reference it in some way, but I love,

Kevin: like with Billy Connolly, that looks, the way it's performed looks like this

Kevin: is all just coming out of his brain in the moment.

Kevin: But you know, like he has prepared that so well.

Kevin: And I just, I really appreciate the, I guess that's the art of it, doing that.

Kevin: The likes with, I mean, Stuart Lee as well, where he's getting annoyed with

Kevin: the audience, but like, that's part of the bit.

Kevin: I really like those, those sort of bits and to say as well i had on um on tyranton

Kevin: training i had on uh canadian i was a canadian comedian but improv as well colin mockery.

Danny: Oh man yeah yeah legend

Kevin: He was lovely he was also lovely because he's

Kevin: the only guest i've hung up on just straight away

Kevin: because i was super excited obviously and i

Kevin: sat down and i turned on the the

Kevin: recording and i said Lotham had a

Kevin: little bit of a chat before we got into it did the podcast and

Kevin: at the end I said thanks very much everyone goodbye and I

Kevin: meant to just stop recording but I ended up kicking him out of the room closing

Kevin: the room and I got really like oh my god what am I after doing this is my hero

Kevin: this is genuinely one of my comedy idol I watched him when I was a kid oh my

Kevin: god I'd love to you know and um I went back into the room but of course he's

Kevin: not there because I booted him out of it but he did come back in,

Kevin: So I was like, oh, my God. And then he came back in. He was like,

Kevin: oh, that ended very quickly. And I was like, I'm so sorry, Mr. Mockery.

Kevin: But yeah, to get to improv on a podcast today was a dream.

Danny: That must have been gold. Yeah, I watch, my wife and I are watching a lot of old Who's Lines Anyway?

Kevin: Yeah.

Danny: And him and Ryan Stiles, when they two get together, they're just,

Danny: that's gold. You know, it really is.

Danny: But yeah, Colin, kudos. I'll have to check out that episode because I love Colin

Danny: Mockery. So let's see, he seems a nice man as well. He seems a nice person.

Kevin: He was lovely the thing i did the nice thing about doing the turning training podcast is,

Kevin: and it's not something like i i didn't

Kevin: think about this when i was doing i just thought it'd be fun but it's nice because

Kevin: it's like i feel like i get more of

Kevin: a vibe of what the what sort of personality the

Kevin: person is rather than if i went into it and just said how

Kevin: did you get started in improv colin how did you get started

Kevin: in comedy what you know what i mean like i

Kevin: found out that he loves cooking apparently he's really good

Kevin: cook uh loves doing that so i was like oh that's really cool

Kevin: um i should also say i did have on brad shorewood from whose line so i might

Kevin: try and go down the route again everyone just to fill up the set but um but

Kevin: yeah no i i he was he was a gent like as you can kind of guess before um for

Kevin: meeting him but yeah it was really nice.

Danny: Very cool i will like i said i will definitely look out for that episode i'll

Danny: get my wife to check it out as well because we both love Colin Mercury and being

Danny: Canadian he's certainly a stereotypical

Danny: gentle, kind person so yeah I'm looking forward to that but yeah if you go down

Danny: that line up of who's lying, there's so many so many good people that are on that show

Danny: whether it's the old classic or the newer one that's it

Danny: it's one of these formats that works regardless of who the host is but I feel

Danny: both of them did a great job So it says perfect.

Danny: Speaking of episodes, we're still on this episode and we're still on your questions.

Danny: So let's have a look at what question number four brings up.

Danny: Okay, question four. Yeah, I've not seen this one pop up before,

Danny: actually. Question four, Kevin. What job would you not want to have?

Kevin: What job would I not want to have? I might zero in on a job the more I think about it.

Kevin: But a job that I never like, it's a bit more general, but anything where I have to sell something,

Kevin: like say a sales job is just, I can't, I can't, like I've been in offices and

Kevin: I've been in, like I worked for a telecommunications company where I was doing call center stuff.

Kevin: So you'd ring up and you'd say, my phone isn't working or I'm not happy with

Kevin: my bill or my internet isn't working and I try and fix it.

Kevin: And then management

Kevin: might say hey if a customer rings up and says their phone isn't working try

Kevin: and sell them mobile broadband and i just hated the idea of going okay your

Kevin: bill is uh actually twice as much as normal because you use more data by the

Kevin: way do you need a brand new google 8a,

Kevin: like i i hated the like disingenuity of it

Kevin: yeah it just just anything where it was

Kevin: like your main focused is a sales target and you

Kevin: have to treat everyone as a fish you have to catch and you just make them buy

Kevin: something and then who cares what what they do after that i i'm just i was never

Kevin: comfortable with that that's something i could never grasp or i try and shy

Kevin: away from it now there's probably a thing with creative people where they feel a bit.

Kevin: Apologetic to go if you don't mind listening to my

Kevin: podcast you know like i have a patreon if

Kevin: you don't mind like that sort of stuff so maybe it's

Kevin: because i'm more inclined to be that sort of creative then it's not easy for

Kevin: me to go hey you need to buy insurance on this thing if i worked in some job

Kevin: it's either that or working in a social media company anything that's touching

Kevin: or manipulating any algorithm i'm like nope don't want to i.

Danny: Know like um i think it's in europe as well.

Danny: It's just finished, basically, the case against Meta in Google,

Danny: and both companies, certainly Meta, I don't know if Google was involved in it as well.

Danny: It might have been Twitter stroke X, but certainly Meta was there,

Danny: where the European Union, that was a bad word, European Union,

Danny: the European Union, even like the lawmakers, found them guilty of addictive practices for kids.

Danny: So there's going to be a massive fine, obviously they're appealing,

Danny: but I hope they do get fined, and I hope it's like a big heavy

Danny: one that actually hurts them because yeah it's just like it's

Danny: i've got two teens uh it's scary but we

Danny: i i used to be in social media a lot and then i just stepped away from it i

Danny: was getting fed up like you just mentioned about the algorithm and that got

Danny: fed up so i'm i'm aware of what it can and can't do etc so i'm always trying

Danny: to help my kids understand that side of it and you know who they're talking

Danny: to online might not necessarily be who they think it is but uh yeah

Danny: I hear you so much on the sales side as well because I think,

Danny: and this is not a downer on sales people but I think you have to be a certain

Danny: kind of person to enjoy sales.

Danny: You've got to be outgoing, confident, you've got to be like that kind of almost

Danny: like a demon that you're just tunnel visioned on the end result, right?

Kevin: I think with,

Kevin: social media, I mean I've been, I'm on every platform basically there like Blue

Kevin: Sky and Instagram and Trades, I think X is the only one that I'm not on anymore at all,

Kevin: And I'm not on every day because I'm like, I, I mean, you can't like,

Kevin: that's, that's ridiculous.

Kevin: But like, I thought about like, oh, well, I go on to TikTok as well.

Kevin: And I should do it. Then I'm told,

Kevin: you know, oh yeah, if you do it consistently, you grow your audience.

Kevin: But then, you know, kind of looking at it and going, it seems like with any

Kevin: social media, you have to talk about pretty much the one topic because almighty

Kevin: algorithm then will put you into one bucket and that's how people will see you

Kevin: when they look into that bucket.

Kevin: And I, like, I hate that idea, you know, I, I might want to talk about soccer

Kevin: today, but tomorrow I might fancy talking about,

Kevin: you know, state of the world, or I might want to talk about wrestling,

Kevin: or I might want to talk about history, or I might want to talk about scrubs again.

Kevin: So I think like anything like that is a bit odd. I think that,

Kevin: uh meta case and was it met in google or youtube or someone like that yeah.

Danny: I think google was involved it's probably the opposite like you say like a youtube

Danny: or something you know it's definitely two of the big ones

Kevin: I wonder is it like without us realizing

Kevin: it is it a bit like i don't

Kevin: know when it was the 80s or something like that where it was like tobacco companies

Kevin: were found to be getting people

Kevin: addicted as well and hiding kind of the negative more the

Kevin: real negative impacts of smoking and

Kevin: that was a massive case but i wonder in an

Kevin: ideal future in 50 years time will people look back and

Kevin: go thank god we have regulations placed

Kevin: on social media because this idea that

Kevin: you have so many people not just addicted to it

Kevin: but then they're addicted to something where they can

Kevin: easily be flooded with hate and negativity you

Kevin: know i remember when i was younger and so you know this isn't a downer and i'm

Kevin: absolutely fine now and all that but when i was like in secondary school i was

Kevin: bullied for like a year year or two i didn't actually know my parents spoke

Kevin: to a teacher about that and that kind of calmed it down which is very nice but um,

Kevin: I remember being bullied in school and then coming home, you know,

Kevin: at four o'clock and you're obviously away from it.

Kevin: Right. Until you go back into school, you have that like break.

Kevin: But social media is just essentially the same thing, but just 24 seven.

Kevin: Yeah. So, yeah, don't put me

Kevin: in a social media place. That's I'll try and take it down from the inside.

Danny: Yeah, I like it. It was like I remember when when Musk first took over Twitter

Danny: and before he renamed it to X.

Danny: And then he went and fired a whole bunch of developers and

Danny: engineers and there

Danny: was like a rumor that one rogue engineer put a

Danny: backdoor bug or something because i remember at the time there was a massive

Danny: crash and twitter just was not working and it was at the time a lot of people

Danny: got fired and nobody could it was then trying to pay engineers they'd fire to

Danny: come back in and fix it and they'll say nope no thank you yeah yeah it's not

Danny: all heroes wear capes you know not all heroes were capes

Kevin: They work quietly in the background.

Danny: Exactly i hear you on the the social media i am i'm a co-founder of a like a

Danny: not-for-profit um to help uh teens with discussions about mental wellness and

Danny: encouraging maybe you know come and talk about their mental health and one of

Danny: the things we hear uh when going to schools and colleges to talk about the program

Danny: was social media and how it brings people

Danny: down because they feel they've got to be someone that they're not and then once they

Danny: get caught into that that net if you like they're almost

Danny: you know like you say you've got trolls you've got people that

Danny: are just hateful um and so many teens are

Danny: getting depressed because of that so i would love to see some form of like you

Danny: say regulation on social media i know some countries are now banning you know

Danny: you can't sign up if you're under 16 or 13 i know legally it's 13 as it stands

Danny: but 16 some countries want it to be 16 etc i'm all for that because I feel your mind as a teenager,

Danny: you've got enough going on in your life as a teen to worry about without all

Danny: the crud that comes to social.

Danny: So I'm all for that, mate. So I will join you in that crusade.

Kevin: Do you know what I noticed...

Kevin: Was it just this morning i noticed so i was

Kevin: on uh oh no i've been working around.

Kevin: The house my my fiancee's up at her parents house so i figured.

Kevin: I'm going to really clean this place up like a

Kevin: b i've bought so much crap forever but while

Kevin: i've been doing that i've left youtube on my phone

Kevin: and i've been just showing on

Kevin: whatever videos uh about state of the world today right

Kevin: about all the things that are going on and you

Kevin: know you'll have like bbc news will come up and i'm like yeah just check

Kevin: that video i'll check that video and then move on to whatever i

Kevin: mean cnn will just say i don't know what everyone and i'll

Kevin: go back in on the next day and i'll have to type

Kevin: again bbc news right and then

Kevin: yesterday or maybe the day before i was

Kevin: like oh fox news i want to see what

Kevin: what they'd say and i wouldn't be a massive lover

Kevin: of fox news but i want to hear what their

Kevin: view is on because how they would report you know big

Kevin: news is happening around the world and i looked at

Kevin: one video and then went away and now every

Kevin: time i go on to youtube since for the last i must

Kevin: be the last 24 hours the first video

Kevin: that'll pop up as a suggestion will be from fox news

Kevin: and now that's not me saying and that's how you definitely know

Kevin: that like right wing but i was like it's interesting

Kevin: how i could continuously jump into bbc news and it still won't quite suggest

Kevin: them but i look at one video from fox news and it's like oh you definitely want

Kevin: to see this and i just wonder then if you do have like kids going oh who's this

Kevin: god any manosphere person yeah.

Danny: Yeah exactly or an andrew tate or something right

Kevin: Even away from that if someone is going oh i'm gonna look at uh this person

Kevin: given out about the new Supergirl movie.

Kevin: The algorithm will just assume then that's all you want to see,

Kevin: and it'll just push every sort of, like, movie critic who...

Kevin: Events like that straight to people's phones i'm like that's not a healthy thing to do.

Danny: Well it's negativity sells right that's if you look at all the clickbait and

Danny: the click rage you know it's always negativity that sells um and that's why

Danny: they push you know push it right into your algorithm and and that's what like

Danny: you say that's why kids have got to be you know guarded and and educated like

Danny: one of the things we keep telling our son is if you

Danny: Because friends at high school is going to have different views than you might

Danny: have because their parents might have different views from us and vice versa.

Danny: So if you hear one side of a story, just do yourself a favor,

Danny: just do a little research, go online and check the story out,

Danny: but then check out for alternatives and see if there's a double side.

Danny: But it's hard because, like you say, the algorithms tend to favor the negative

Danny: stuff and the stuff that causes harm, unfortunately.

Kevin: I have made the joke many a time that if tyrant and draining doesn't take off

Kevin: as high as I want I'm leaning hard into toxic manosphere,

Kevin: everything will be women's fault you never know I might get a few views see

Kevin: whether that will work but I haven't dared go that route yet no.

Danny: No and as you say you can tell when people are joining when they're just chasing

Danny: the algo chasing the clicks and the clickbait etc

Danny: so yeah it's it's it's not a good time but

Danny: hopefully you know as more people encourage open minding alternatives it would

Danny: be better and like we say maybe five or ten years time we can revisit this on

Danny: a future episode get you back on me and hopefully you know yeah i wouldn't miss

Danny: x if it disappeared or twitter i would not miss that platform if it disappeared at all

Kevin: I was on twitter and the reason why i call

Kevin: it x now is i'd seen this argument and

Kevin: i get the kind of i never wanted do they

Kevin: call it like x i was always calling it twitter and then i seen someone make

Kevin: this argument to call it x and i was like oh i like that i'm

Kevin: gonna do it now is that they said when so when you call it twitter you harken

Kevin: back to the days when i mean it was never fantastic but i mean i met one of

Kevin: my best friends off of twitter and i met loads of lovely people off twitter

Kevin: as well so there was good things about it but the version of twitter that's there now,

Kevin: is nothing like what it was years ago, even five years ago.

Kevin: So calling it Twitter, at least for me now that I'm talking about myself,

Kevin: kind of like says, oh, but see, it's still kind of like it.

Kevin: Whereas what it is, is X, this mutated version of Twitter that has grok with

Kevin: all the images or the issues that they've had with images. That is like, that's disgusting.

Danny: Sexualizing women, yeah.

Kevin: And you know fascist tendencies that

Kevin: seem to run amok there not to mention Elon Musk himself

Kevin: you know that's why I always refer to it as X

Kevin: because I'm like no that's for him that's that's

Kevin: him that like that's what it is it's not

Kevin: Twitter where it's like oh it's it's addictive and it's annoying but

Kevin: oh it's quite good as well so yeah no

Kevin: I I'm not uh i got rid of it

Kevin: when he took over maybe or not long after and it's i thought oh what am i going

Kevin: to do then like i have a lot of followers there and everything else i say a

Kevin: day later i was like i do not miss it i have no urge to to go back i don't miss anything yeah well.

Danny: I say i deleted all my tweets and then just closed the account well i've got

Danny: the accounts there but it's just it points over to blue sky basically you know find me here and that's

Kevin: It that's smart way to do it simple.

Danny: Simple but yeah hopefully we'll get you back on and we'll talk about we might

Danny: be doing a football podcast but then who knows we'll find out a bit less social

Danny: media but I like that it's a nice way to ease in to your final question on the

Danny: random question hot seat so let's see what we have

Danny: Yeah, I'm going to finish with this one. Question number five,

Danny: Kevin. If you were in a circus, what would your job be?

Kevin: If I was in the circus, I was going to say admin, which kind of points to my

Kevin: own level of self-conference.

Kevin: I'd be in the back organizing.

Kevin: I don't know that many jobs in the circus. I'd have to do something with an

Kevin: animal, right? I think I'd tackle the elephant.

Kevin: Although I'm not sure today, because as I said, I had issues with elephants

Kevin: before. I didn't think they were very nice, but they've grown on me.

Kevin: But then I'm not sure circuses really work with animals like that anymore, do they?

Danny: I don't know. I had a guest on an earlier episode a similar question.

Danny: It wasn't the same question, but the circus came up for some reason.

Danny: And we're trying to decide, you know, are circuses still as popular today?

Danny: Do you still see them? And I think maybe in larger, certainly in North America,

Danny: larger cities you would see a circus.

Danny: You wouldn't see where I live. You probably wouldn't see where you live, mate.

Danny: In Ireland, you'd have to go, you know, to the bigger city one of the bigger

Danny: cities there but yeah I don't think the last circus I saw

Danny: was I think my wife was pregnant with her first kid so that's 16 years ago at least

Danny: and we saw there was a giraffe so we saw a giraffe there your spirit animal

Danny: there was it a lion or a tiger?

Danny: I think it was a tiger there was some monkeys there was

Danny: and maybe a parakeet for some random reason.

Danny: And that was it. I think that was it. There was nothing, you know,

Danny: it wasn't what I would have classed a circus when I was a kid, for example.

Danny: You know, it was very, very different.

Kevin: I cannot remember, but I believe, you know, I mean, you're going to have a lot

Kevin: of circuses that were bringing along animals and they were just shoved into

Kevin: a cage and then out and shoved it, you know.

Kevin: So if I'm wrong in that, if someone's listening, they're like,

Kevin: no of course there can't be animals at a circus anymore that's horrible that's cruel to them,

Kevin: good that there's not animals there unless they have like a dog or cat or something

Kevin: i'll work with them um what i was just thinking of is though and i i've been

Kevin: to a few circuses uh maybe two or three.

Kevin: And the ring what's his name the ring the ring master ring master right i know

Kevin: he introduces is, you know, kind of the next act, and he says whatever.

Kevin: But I do wonder how, I guess, how much, like, stand-up material are they doing?

Kevin: Like, is that the way, is that a better way circuses should go?

Kevin: Let's put it like this. If you have, and I'm not even saying,

Kevin: I'm not particularly a fan of his comedy, but...

Kevin: You know, Jimmy Carr is obviously very successful as both a comedian and as like a host, right?

Kevin: He's very good. He knows what he's doing. Or like Michael McIntyre is another

Kevin: British comedian who hosts a lot of shows.

Kevin: If they were the ringmaster in a circus, I feel like they would be able to tie

Kevin: everything together while keeping everyone entertained.

Kevin: And would that bring more people in then saying, oh, well, we're getting like

Kevin: a standup gig here, as well as all the fancy stuff with the acrobatics.

Kevin: So I might go with that. I might try that. I might try Ringmaster.

Danny: Be an improv. Improv Ringmaster. That'd be pretty cool.

Danny: I could see a TV show based on that. I mean, there's all there's like,

Danny: what's a TV show that Greg who's the big giant?

Danny: He was in a Greg Davis.

Danny: Greg Davis, yeah. It's Taskmaster. Not quite Ringmaster, but it's called Taskmaster,

Danny: right? The TV show with him, I think.

Danny: Do something like that, but like you say, do a Ringmaster version.

Danny: And I feel maybe and you were making me think of it there while you were talking

Danny: about obviously it is cruel and that's why you don't see as many circuses now

Danny: people realise it wasn't good for the animals but I feel maybe if you had like

Danny: a wildlife park or safari park or something that's almost,

Danny: you're not teaching animals to do tricks but you see that kind of if you go

Danny: to some of these places now right, if you've got say dolphins that are doing

Danny: things and maybe, I don't know just riffing there,

Danny: that'd be kind of cool to go to like an actual open space wildlife thing but

Danny: then you've got a ringmaster that's tying, you know, maybe travelling with you

Danny: or something that gives you a guide or something?

Kevin: Yeah, I guess I'd go with that because again I'm looking at joke writing but

Kevin: yeah, I cannot remember how much of,

Kevin: improv i guess or comedy that the ringmaster does um i can't remember since

Kevin: last time i've been to circus but i think maybe something like that would you

Kevin: count cirque du soleil as a circus.

Danny: That's an interesting question um someone's asked that before not in a shot

Danny: like in conversation someone's asked would you class cirque du soleil and i

Danny: don't know i feel that's more for me that's more like an entertainment show

Danny: like a vegas experience right you go to vegas you go like they see the big Celine

Danny: Dion, big shows or whatever.

Danny: I feel Cirque du Soleil is a little bit like that, but there are some animals

Danny: involved in it as well, aren't there, I feel? Or are there? I don't know.

Kevin: All I can remember is like, I remember turning on the TV and going,

Kevin: oh, I've never seen Cirque du

Kevin: Soleil before. I might as well turn this on because it's a massive thing.

Kevin: And it was, it felt more like, I guess, ballet or like opera.

Kevin: It was, it was an operatic singer and a lot of acrobats kind of doing a lot

Kevin: of, a lot of different shapes in the sky.

Kevin: And I was like, right, this is all very slow and deliberate movements and very

Kevin: impressive, but it didn't give me the circus feel.

Danny: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Kevin: So, yeah, I don't know what I counted as. I think if you brought along 100 people

Kevin: who've never been to the circus but know what the circus is,

Kevin: at least have their conception in their head, and then you showed them Cirque

Kevin: du Soleil, the majority of them would go, give me back my money.

Kevin: That's not what I imagined.

Danny: But I feel it's got such a big brand now anyway. Everybody knows what Cirque

Danny: du Soleil is, right? So they'd know before you go in.

Danny: I know before we moved up here, the place we lived, it was a larger city.

Danny: And the equivalent of search to sell it wasn't search to sell it but it was the equivalent of

Danny: um and i think it was like a japanese

Danny: or chinese version i can't remember the name of it i'll leave it in the episode

Danny: show notes so if you listen to this episode check the show notes out i'll leave

Danny: the details but i think it was a chinese um equivalent of search to silly and

Danny: people were like raving over that you know you have to go see this something

Danny: like a shen you or shen kind of like I say I don't want to

Danny: get the name wrong so I will leave a link in the episode show notes

Danny: Circus also yeah yeah exactly so

Danny: very well known and you know what you get into when you go see it right people were

Danny: like lining up for hours to just get in there and

Danny: go see the show so I get it but yeah if I was thinking of a circus I'd want

Danny: to see animals but then you can't because it's not good for the animals right

Danny: so it's like yin yang you know set up but I like that that's like a nice way

Danny: to finish your time in the random questions hot seat as is only fair i've had

Danny: you in the hot seat for about

Danny: 45 50 minutes now it's only fair to throw over the question asking baton to you good sir

Kevin: Okay, let's get serious.

Danny: From the improv comedian, come on.

Kevin: All right. I feel like the fair thing then is to throw a question at you that

Kevin: I'd normally ask people, right?

Kevin: So if you are in charge of your own people,

Kevin: right, whether you could, whichever you prefer, like an island full of people,

Kevin: however many people you want, like any good leader, you're going to have to

Kevin: deal with a scandal at some point, political scandal.

Kevin: You can keep this as lighthearted as you want. What scandal do you think you

Kevin: would be involved in that people would find out about?

Kevin: And by the way, that they would be unhappy about. They don't have to try and

Kevin: kill you now over it, but they'd go, huh, I'm not quite sure I follow this guy anymore.

Danny: Ooh, that's a good one, mate. And it's a scandal that I have caused to be involved in.

Kevin: Yeah, you did it.

Danny: Yeah, I did it. Okay.

Kevin: Or said it or whatever way.

Danny: I would probably say get caught in a massive lie that I didn't plan for and

Danny: I didn't mean so what I mean by that is my wife always says I'd make a good

Danny: What's the game there's a game I can't remember the name of the game there's

Danny: a game that you play and you've got to basically tell a story to the other players

Danny: and it's going to be a lie but

Danny: it's not Banjax it's um i can't remember what it's

Danny: called anyway there's a game that you tell a lie and people

Danny: you've got to tell as a truth and the other players

Danny: have got to work out is this a truth or not and my wife says you'd

Danny: be you'd be real good at that because you're always making up

Danny: shit um and you're so like adamant that you're telling the truth and i just

Danny: do it for fun um i do it to try catch my kids out my wife or whatever like i'll

Danny: make up stories on the spot how things happened and clearly they didn't happen

Danny: that way so i think that'd probably be it where i'd be telling something just

Danny: is a bit of fun just to see if I can get away with it,

Danny: but then there's real life consequences because it has

Danny: a hugely negative connotation for the people on the island or the wider,

Danny: and now the island is getting attacked because this

Danny: harmless lie got out and it's pissed off

Danny: a fascist leader in another country or something, so now they're going to come

Danny: and bomb the crap out of this island and everybody's going to die because of what I said.

Danny: It's a harmless joke. I feel I don't know if that's a scandal as such,

Danny: to be honest, but I feel...

Danny: It might turn into an international scandal because I've now upset,

Danny: you know, the leader of North Korea because I said this funny thing that maybe

Danny: someone like to say, oh, yeah, you know, the North Korean, I can't remember his name, Kim Jong-un.

Kevin: Kim Jong-un? Yeah, on and the dad was ill. But yeah, he was ill.

Kevin: He's dead now. But Kim Jong-un, and now Kim Jong-un.

Danny: Yeah. Kim Jong-un. Yeah. So if I say something like, oh, yeah,

Danny: he's very well known for, you know, doing naughty things to camels.

Danny: You know, he pays his guards to, you

Danny: know to keep it all quiet exactly and

Danny: it's so adamant i can say yeah yeah you actually if you ever look at

Danny: him um he he wears little camel epaulettes on his military uniform you know

Danny: because he likes to the smell and the feel of camel hair etc clearly not and

Danny: maybe he does who knows but clearly not so someone just ridiculous like that

Danny: but then it actually turns into a big international incident and causes so much havoc and chaos

Kevin: So uh do you know

Kevin: what would happen usually on on my own podcasts

Kevin: is i'd say what type of scandal would you have we'd come up with a scandal and

Kevin: then i'd say okay your advisors suggest that you go on to the nightly news and

Kevin: you discuss this you have to tackle this scandal head on do you want to sit

Kevin: down with more of a propaganda sort of person or do you want to sit down with

Kevin: a newscaster and you decide and then we role play that scenario however,

Kevin: If, in your scenario, where you're saying, no, no, I'd be adamant that Kim Jong-un

Kevin: was having his way with camels, and you're saying, no, no, I'd stay adamant,

Kevin: I would tell this story repeatedly as if it's the truth, I'd feel like that

Kevin: roleplay would then, instead of the apology, forget that, that's too late,

Kevin: it would be, I want to do that interview where you keep adamantly saying this is the truth.

Kevin: Because my first question as a rebuttal to that was, I don't think camels are

Kevin: native to North Korea. So how would he even get in contact with them?

Danny: Yeah, well, they're kept in his missile silos. They don't have missiles.

Danny: That's just a big lie. Like the WMDs from the Iraqi war back in the Gulf War. That's a big lie.

Kevin: It's just a kink he's hiding.

Danny: It's just a kink. It's like little chambers and little, like,

Danny: really comfortable penthouse suites almost for these camels.

Danny: It looks after them so well.

Kevin: But some rockets have been shown to fly over the, is it the Bay of Japan or

Kevin: the Sea of Japan, and they've fallen into that.

Kevin: Are you saying that those missiles weren't carrying any weaponry,

Kevin: it was just camels inside them?

Danny: Fake news, AI.

Kevin: See, this is what's happened with AI. It's just a cop out now for every politician to go, that's AI.

Danny: Exactly right.

Kevin: Do you know what the interesting thing about it's something that um there's

Kevin: an irish comedian i think it was adine i'm gonna i'm gonna credit this to adie

Kevin: mcqueen she's an irish comedian and hopefully it was her who said it we were

Kevin: chatting and we were saying about scandals,

Kevin: and she said the interesting thing is you can kind of divide her up into two

Kevin: so if you have someone who's very i'm going to use left and right just to make

Kevin: this easy if you have someone who's very left-wing,

Kevin: all about, we should tax billionaires, we need to give money out to social programs,

Kevin: public sector, free education, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera.

Kevin: If someone leans that way, it means that their scandal is probably going to be money-related.

Kevin: If they lean more right wing, we'll say, we should have, you know,

Kevin: conservative families.

Kevin: The woman is the housewife or, you know, whatever, like, no,

Kevin: no, you shouldn't be divorcing.

Kevin: You should only get married if you're staying in a room forever and none of this crack.

Kevin: That sort of person will most likely have a sex scandal.

Kevin: And it's because it's like the taboo nature of it.

Kevin: Do you know if i'm saying there should be no billionaires and then

Kevin: you go do you want to be a billionaire i'm like

Kevin: oh that's tempting whereas if

Kevin: i'm like oh well you know

Kevin: i'm a big supporter of lgbt community oh do

Kevin: you want to sleep with someone who's a

Kevin: transgender woman that's not a taboo for me to go

Kevin: oh maybe so no you're fine i'm with selene no you're good so i just think that's

Kevin: really interesting i never thought of it like that but usually people go with

Kevin: that i don't really know what your deal is with camels and i don't know i don't

Kevin: know where on the political spectrum that goes but it certainly.

Danny: Ties into the stereotypical scotsman and sheep right which is come on

Kevin: Oh maybe that.

Danny: So maybe that's where subconsciously thinking well gotta get an exotic sheep

Danny: what's exotic sheep camel there you go

Kevin: Yeah i think yeah i've never i don't think anyone,

Kevin: like to think i have a decent memory i don't think anyone has ever mentioned

Kevin: a camel in any situation on the podcast.

Danny: Well there you go i'll have to come on maybe i will be a little leader on your

Danny: podcast maybe that was a great question i enjoyed that went in an interesting direction there no

Kevin: Yeah that's the vibe.

Danny: I liked it i liked it but kevin i

Danny: really enjoyed chatting to you in general today and i

Danny: could go on for hours and hours um you know like we said

Danny: we spoke way like for almost 30

Danny: minutes before we start recording the podcast so i could chat with you forever

Danny: um and we'll definitely get you back on a future episode um and maybe we'll

Danny: even do that football podcast who knows but for anybody that's enjoyed the chat

Danny: as much as i have where can they find the podcast that you do currently you

Danny: mentioned you've got a blog on medium etc where's all the cool places i can

Danny: find and listen to you mate so

Kevin: Thank you very much the tyrant and training podcast

Kevin: you can find i mean there's a website tyrant and

Kevin: training if you go onto it kind of cool thing that i

Kevin: really like about it because i don't know how many people listen on

Kevin: the website itself as opposed to like the usual places spotify and

Kevin: apple podcast but if you go on to the tyrant and training website there's a

Kevin: button there that you can uh click and you go into it and leave a question for

Kevin: future tyrants so if i have someone on and i say hey do you want to do a town

Kevin: hall where the local population the peasants even they are asking new questions,

Kevin: your question will come up to them. And I have no idea what they are until,

Kevin: i see him so could do it that way

Kevin: um as i said you can listen to turn to training on

Kevin: any any like the usual ones where

Kevin: you find podcasts i also have i should mention again the facehuggers and friends

Kevin: podcast which is an actual play rpg where one of my character and a few other

Kevin: characters are all on board spaceship trying to survive um i believe i'm still

Kevin: surviving somehow as lucky,

Kevin: and that is facehuggersandfriends.com which you can find that's set everywhere else as well.

Kevin: And I mean, I'm online and as I said, every other social media is Kev Ryan person.

Kevin: By the way, I have a cat beside me now who's also trying to plug.

Danny: I was thinking of that cat. Is that your chair just being squeaky?

Kevin: No, I think it might just be the cat. But yeah, Kev Ryan person.

Kevin: So K-E-V-R-Y-A-N person because I had to put something beside it and I might

Kevin: have had a Donald Trump moment with person, camera, woman, TV,

Kevin: but I didn't put that on person.

Kevin: So yeah, you can find me on Instagram and treads and blue sky with that.

Danny: Excellent. And as always, I will put all these links in the episode show notes.

Danny: So if you're listening on your favourite podcast app or over at the 5 Random

Danny: Questions website, just check out the episode show notes and all the links will

Danny: be there to take you through to all the cool stuff that Kevin's doing.

Danny: So again, Kevin, thanks for appearing on today's 5 Random Questions.

Kevin: Those are fun. Thank you very much.

Danny: Thanks for listening to 5 Random Questions and if this was your first time

Danny: here feel free to hit follow and check out past episodes if you enjoyed this

Danny: week's episode i'd love for you to leave a review on the app you're currently

Danny: listening on and if you know someone else who enjoy the show be sure to send

Danny: them this way it's very much appreciated until the next time keep asking those questions