If you’re not feeling the pressure to "start your year off strong” or to get a jumpstart on your goals but you're not feeling it – this episode is for you.
The rest of the world that tells us we need to hit the ground running on January 1. What if January is actually a time to pause, rest, and root down before we grow?
If you're ready to stop living a life that feels draining, book your Life + Energy Audit.
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Welcome to the Unfolding Podcast.
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:This is a space where we explore what it
really looks like to trust yourself, to
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:say no without guilt, and to live your
life like it actually belongs to you.
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:I am Erica Voell and in my work as
a decision mentor and inner trust
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:guide, I help women in midlife trust
their inner guidance, understand
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:their unique strengths, and stop
saying yes to what drains them.
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:I help them dismantle conditioning,
regulate their nervous system
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:and reclaim their authority so
that their no feels powerful and
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:their yes feels unmistakably true.
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:On this show, we have honest conversations
about self-trust, boundaries, energy and
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:identity, especially for women in midlife
who are done living by the shoulds.
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:And second guessing themselves.
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:You'll hear stories, insights,
and tools rooted in human
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:design, coaching, and real life.
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:Not to tell you what to do, but to
help you hear yourself so you can stop
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:overthinking and start making decisions
that feel clear, grounded, and true.
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:Happy New Year.
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:This is a very January episode.
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:It's also an episode if you're
embarking on something new, but you're
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:not quite feeling that momentum.
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:In January, there is so much
pressure to create goals and
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:to be the new year, new you.
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:Everywhere we look, it's this.
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:Get a jumpstart on your year.
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:Take fast action now so
you don't get left behind.
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:Gyms are packed.
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:All you have to do is drive
by one and you'll see it.
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:Because this is the year finally, that
people are going to get into shape.
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:Yes.
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:And we know by February that more than
80% of those resolutions that people
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:have set will have been abandoned.
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:Because those resolutions are unrealistic.
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:They're disconnected from their values.
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:They are based on shoulds
and they really lack a plan.
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:They lack accountability
and a deeper meaning.
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:We're so conditioned to believe that we
should start January with this big bang,
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:even though it is the dead of winter.
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:If you look outside in
the Northern Hemisphere.
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:Nothing is growing.
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:Everything looks dormant.
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:Nature is resting, which is what our
ancestors did until we had modern
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:conveniences of heat and artificial light.
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:During this time of wintering,
the trees and the seeds that were
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:planted in the fall are settling
in and they're waiting until the
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:stirring starts in a couple of months.
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:They are doing deep work inside
that we can't see on the outside.
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:The idea of New Year's resolutions have
been around for a really long time.
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:I actually looked this up.
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:They've been around for centuries, but
the commercialization of them really
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:started in the 1920s when companies
started to capitalize on this idea of
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:becoming a new you in the new year,
and it has just grown from there.
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:The wellness and fitness industries kicked
into high gear in the:
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:saw the rise of aerobics in the 1970s.
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:You know, the gyms that we love or that we
actually even started in the:
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:Before then, they were for
bodybuilders and for people
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:who were in some sort of sport.
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:And then around the 2010s things really
exploded even more with the internet
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:and social media, with online workouts
and streaming and wearable devices.
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:I mean, for a while, didn't we all have
a device that told us how good we were
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:doing, how many steps we were getting.
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:And not to be left out.
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:The personal growth industry also wants
you to set goals and get a jumpstart on
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:those goals with challenges and the top
five ways to get going in the new year.
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:Businesses want to start their New
year office quickly as possible.
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:I heard my coach talking about
this, about how it was hit
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:the ground running in January.
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:Because with the craziness of
the holidays, there's a sense
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:of like, okay, it's over.
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:Let's get on with it.
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:Let's get back to real life.
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:And all of it is capitalizing
on the momentum so many feel
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:collectively as we start the new year.
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:It's when businesses make a lot of
money and with the rush of the holidays
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:over, they know you are searching
for a solution to the problem that
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:you are so sick of and you don't
want to deal with for another year.
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:I even shared my own workshop
with my email subscribers.
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:But what we did not do in the
workshop was set specific goals.
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:We got clearer on what we actually want
and how we want to feel in the new year,
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:but we didn't set any specific goals.
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:Our minds are so uncomfortable
with the stillness and the quiet
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:in this gap between the solstice
and when the spring starts.
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:But honestly, our bodies are tired.
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:After the holidays, there's
this lack of sunlight.
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:It's cold outside and our
bodies are wanting winter.
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:Our bodies are craving
rest after the holidays.
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:I know there are parts of the US that
things are beautiful and they're growing,
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:but for the most of us, things are really
dormant, but our minds are ready to go.
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:Our bodies want rest, and
our minds want to go, go, go.
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:It can feel really uncomfortable, but
it's so necessary for anything to grow.
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:There needs to be a pause.
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:There needs to be some rest.
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:I have to think that this is why seasonal
affective disorder and depression
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:increase so greatly in January.
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:The height of the holidays is over,
but we have this expectation of
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:ourselves that we should be ready to go.
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:We should be ready to move.
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:We should be ready to do the next thing.
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:That's what happens when we override
our own natural rhythm, our own natural
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:timing, because there can be this
feeling of feeling like, I need clarity
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:now, or I'm going to fall behind.
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:But here's what I want you to hear.
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:You are not behind and you
are not going to fall behind.
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:That pressure is external, which then
leads to this internal chaos you feel.
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:But when you slow down, there is time
for meaning and allowing for the ahas
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:to come through of what your next
step is, which in turn allows you to
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:offer grace to yourself and to others.
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:What's been so fascinating
in the last few years?
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:In contrast to all this go, go, go.
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:I've noticed that there's a
countertrend that's happening.
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:It's a return to the older ways, like
following the course of nature, using
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:January as a time to slow down and to rest
and to allow our bodies to go through that
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:same wintering that is happening outside.
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:I know, like I said earlier, that there
are parts of the US that this is a lovely
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:time for growing season and that they
are warm in January and February, but I
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:guarantee you most of us in the US are
cold, dark, and everything is brown.
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:This is actually a really beautiful time
to connect with your natural or your
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:body's natural rhythms, putting your phone
far from your bed to allow your body to
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:slip into sleep on its own natural clock.
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:You can't always sleep later, but you
can give yourself extra rest or a nap
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:in the middle of the day can help.
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:I saw a quote from Ruby Miranda
the other day that said, "we
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:are not becoming someone new.
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:We are improving on
what we've already got."
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:And I could not think of a better way
to explain about this time of year.
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:We are all amazing in our own unique
way, and it's okay to feel like you don't
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:wanna get up and go at this time of year.
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:Your body is in tune with the seasons
more than you might even realize.
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:And it's okay to stop rushing and to
jumping on the bandwagon of the new year.
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:It's especially okay if it means that
you stop overriding your own timing.
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:If your body is telling you to slow
down after the holidays, then I
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:want you to follow that honor that.
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:'Cause the date on the
calendar is just a date.
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:The Julian Calendar started the new
year on January 1st, but as they
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:added in Christian holidays, they
noticed that like it was so off.
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:It was the new year didn't start
like at the same time every year.
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:But it wasn't until 1582, 1582
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:when the Gregorian calendar
was adopted, and that put the
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:new year in the dead of winter.
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:And it became the new year that we all
know and we are all familiar with, and
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:maybe we love, and maybe we don't, but
many traditional calendars based the new
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:year on the solar or the lunar cycle.
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:For centuries, the spring equinox
was the start of the new year
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:in many parts of the world.
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:Or the new year.
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:Started it at the end
of harvest in October.
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:The new year on the Chinese calendar
actually begins on the second new
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:moon following the winter solstice.
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:So for so long, January felt like a
month for me, but it was this space
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:between Christmas and Groundhog Day.
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:It was this just empty, barren month.
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:And why Groundhog Day.
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:As a kid, I always loved Groundhog Day.
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:I love the idea that an animal
could predict the weather.
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:I found that so fascinating and like
my logical mind learned that it wasn't
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:possible, but part of me loved the idea so
much that nature played this larger role.
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:For years, I always felt that the
year didn't really get started
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:until around Groundhog Day.
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:And several years ago I learned of
the Celtic Festival of Imbolc, which
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:falls the day before Groundhog Day.
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:Imbolc is exactly the
middle between the solstice.
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:And the Equinox.
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:And then it all started to make sense.
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:Imbolc literally translates as "the
belly of the mother" because it's
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:when new life is starting to stir,
but it's not yet ready to be birthed.
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:Ooh.
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:Many animals are pregnant around this
time and they will be giving birth
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:later in the months of February and
March, and I love the idea of starting
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:to feel this momentum later in January
or even around Groundhog Day or Imbolc.
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:I don't know why I love
Groundhog Day so much.
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:I just do.
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:There's something about it,
maybe because he's cute.
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:Then, as I learned more about human
design, it did not surprise me that
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:the human design New Year starts
on January 22nd, which is when the
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:sun moves into a gate that has the
energy to honor your hopes and dreams,
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:and to make those dreams a reality.
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:Ooh, that sounds so good.
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:And that's like what I wanna tap into.
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:The gates that are in the first part
of January, that where we are right now
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:as I'm recording this, they are meant
for reflection to help you notice what
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:didn't work, so that then you can start
to take action after January 22nd.
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:In the lunar calendar where January
is the last month of the year.
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:This year it's the year of the Snake,
and it's before the year of the Horse.
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:The year of the snake has been about
shedding just like a snake sheds its skin.
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:It's things and relationships that
need to die away that have been
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:shifting and it's not been comfortable,
but it's absolutely necessary.
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:So what does all this stuff
mean for you in this last month
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:before the Chinese New Year?
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:There may be thi some shedding and
things that need to happen to let
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:go and to release so we don't carry
them into the new year so that we
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:don't carry things that needed to be
shedded as part of the Year of the
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:Snake into the Year of the Horse.
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:So if you're feeling like there's still
something that needs to be let go before
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:you can fully move into the new year.
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:It's okay.
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:And it's absolutely perfectly normal.
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:You are following the
rhythms of your body.
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:You're following the rhythms of your DNA.
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:And you're following the rhythms
of the earth and the lunar cycles.
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:So if you are not feeling ready to
jump into this new year with both feet,
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:this is your permission to slow down.
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:This is your body asking for quiet.
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:Listen to that.
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:You have a natural rhythm in your
body and it's important to give
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:yourself grace to follow that.
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:To release that sense of urgency, which
then leads you to doubting yourself
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:because you're thinking, " why can't
I get excited like everyone else?"
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:Maybe it's the rest of
society that's outta whack and
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:following an arbitrary date.
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:I'm not saying you shouldn't jump
into a class that you've been wanting
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:to try or to do something new, but
be okay if it takes you a couple
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:of weeks to feel that momentum.
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:Setting goals and how you want to
feel in the new year can help you
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:feel some excitement and allow you
to plan for when the clouds and
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:the snow have started to subside.
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:I, myself, am waiting until the end
of January to launch something new.
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:I am doing some planning and some
prep, but I wanted to give myself
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:a slow and steady start to the year
instead of jumping in and then being
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:exhausted by the middle of February
like I have done for so many years.
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:So when you catch yourself in the next
couple of weeks thinking, "I have to
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:figure things out so I don't fall behind."
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:I want you to acknowledge the
momentum you see others having around
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:you, and then pause and remember
in the tortoise and the hare.
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:Who won the race?
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:It was the tortoise that kept
going at a steady pace, one
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:foot in front of the other.
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:Breathing in and exhaling, not the
hare who started off with a bang
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:and then lost steam halfway through.
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:There is no urgency.
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:There is only your own
right timing for your body.
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:Give yourself permission to
allow the wintering to happen.
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:To be okay with a pause before you
move into your New Year's goals.
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:And if you're feeling a lot of
pressure to figure it out or to fix
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:things, I want to invite you into a
Life & Energy Audit session with me.
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:This is a one-time session designed to
help you pause the noise and to look at
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:where you're feeling off without pressure
or feeling like you have to figure it out.
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:We will take an honest look at
where your energy feels scattered
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:or depleted, and where you've been
saying yes, out of habit or guilt.
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:We won't solve everything in one call.
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:But you'll start to see what patterns
and energy leaks are holding you back
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:and the expectations that you have been
carrying without even realizing it.
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:There are no action steps that you
have to do to fulfill it or homework,
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:but you'll leave with a clearer
sense of what's not working for you,
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:words for what matter most, and one
small, doable step that feels true.
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:This is not a coaching session or a
human design analysis or a reading,
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:but human design informs me about
what co questions to ask you and
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:where you may have developed patterns.
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:You can book your Life + Energy
Audit in the show notes.
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:And if this episode resonated
with you, I would be so grateful
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:if you would follow the show.
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:Leave a quick review or share it
with someone you know who needs it.
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:Be well, and I will talk to you soon.