📬 Listener Questions & Community

It's 5:45 PM. I'm cooking three separate dinners on not enough burners. My six-year-old is crying about the green spoon. My eight-year-old is in a Minecraft cave with a dog that needs a bone. My ten-year-old has found paint.

'Find a good stopping place' is good advice.

It just assumes conditions that don't exist in this house.

What We Cover

• The 5:45 PM scenario in full — three kids, three meals, three headphones, zero spare burners, and what it actually costs to transition one child off a screen while managing the rest
• Compliance depletion — why your child has run out of yeses by dinner time, and why that's not defiance or addiction
• Self-determination theory and autonomy — why the iPad might be the only thing your child got to choose all day, and what happens when you take it
• Why 'find a good stopping place' works on Saturday morning and collapses on Wednesday night — and what's actually different between those two moments
• The working memory piece — why your child isn't defying the boundary, they just can't hold it without you standing there
• Task-switching costs for the ADHD brain — what every transition actually costs you at the end of the day
• Why you're not managing the transitions. You are the transition.
• The Saturday morning benchmark — why one good morning doesn't set the standard, and why comparing Wednesday night to it is destroying you
• What the parenting advice doesn't account for: one adult, multiple kids, depleted executive function, and no support

Free Resources

Surviving the Mental Load of the School Year (Free)

👉 https://adhdmums.com.au/product/adhd-school-year-mental-load-kit/

Household Family Meeting Template (Free)

👉 https://adhdmums.com.au/product/adhd-household-family-meeting-template/

Paid Resource

Meltdown & Shutdown Guide for Mums & Children

👉 https://adhdmums.com.au/product/navigating-meltdowns-strategies-for-parents/

Related Episodes

• When a Neuroscientist Says iPads Cause ADHD — And You Wonder if You've Damaged Your Kids | Listen here
• S3 EP44 — Why Bad Behaviour Is Rarely Bad at All (and How to Respond Instead) | Listen here
• S3 EP12 — Quick Reset: I Can't Stop Snapping When My Child Does This One Thing | Listen here
• S2 EP84 — I Love My Family… But I'm So F**king Angry (Mum Rage Part 1) | Listen here
• S2 EP27 — Quick Tip: I Have an Antagonist in My House | Listen here

🎙️ Ask a Listener Question (voice)

Voice notes are preferred when possible — hearing your voice helps add context — but you’re very welcome to submit a written question instead.

Send a WhatsApp voice or written on 0403 457 313

Send a SMS voice or written on 0403 457 313

👥 Join the ADHD Mums Facebook Group

For community, shared language, and conversations with other mums who get it.

https://www.facebook.com/groups/adhdmumspodcast

References

Arnsten, A. F. T., & Li, B.-M. (2005). Neurobiology of executive functions: Catecholamine influences on prefrontal cortical functions. Biological Psychiatry, 57(11), 1377–1384. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.biopsych.2004.08.019

Arnsten, A. F. T. (2011). Catecholamine influences on dorsolateral prefrontal cortical networks. Biological Psychiatry, 69(12), e89–e99. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.biopsych.2011.01.027

Barkley, R. A. (1997). Behavioral inhibition, sustained attention, and executive functions: Constructing a unifying theory of ADHD. Psychological Bulletin, 121(1), 65–94. https://doi.org/10.1037/0033-2909.121.1.65

Baumeister, R. F., Bratslavsky, E., Muraven, M., & Tice, D. M. (1998). Ego depletion: Is the active self a limited resource? Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 74(5), 1252–1265. https://doi.org/10.1037/0022-3514.74.5.1252

Hagger, M. S., Chatzisarantis, N. L. D., Alberts, H., Anggono, C. O., Batailler, C., Birt, A. R., Brand, R., Brandt, M. J., Brewer, G., Bruyneel, S., Calvillo, D. P., Campbell, W. K., Cannon, P. R., Carlucci, M., Carruth, N. P., Cheung, T., Crowell, A., De Ridder, D. T. D., Dewitte, S., . . . Zwienenberg, M. (2016). A multilab preregistered replication of the ego-depletion effect. Perspectives on Psychological Science, 11(4), 546–573. https://doi.org/10.1177/1745691616652873

Herwig, U., Bräuer, K., Connemann, B., Spitzer, M., & Jakobs, O. (2018). Selective impairment of attentional set shifting in adults with ADHD. BMC Psychiatry, 18, Article 334. https://doi.org/10.1186/s12888-018-1912-5

Monsell, S. (2003). Task switching. Trends in Cognitive Sciences, 7(3), 134–140. https://doi.org/10.1016/S1364-6613(03)00028-7

Rubinstein, J. S., Meyer, D. E., & Evans, J. E. (2001). Executive control of cognitive processes in task switching. Journal of Experimental Psychology: Human Perception and Performance, 27(4), 763–797. https://doi.org/10.1037/0096-1523.27.4.763

Ryan, R. M., & Deci, E. L. (2000). Self-determination theory and the facilitation of intrinsic motivation, social development, and well-being. American Psychologist, 55(1), 68–78. https://doi.org/10.1037/0003-066X.55.1.68