11: Putting it All Together - Leadership 101 Development Program - Mt. Nebo Leadership Podcast: Leaders Lift

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11: Putting it All Together - Leadership 101 Development Program

Episode 11 • 12th April 2023 • Mt. Nebo Leadership Podcast: Leaders Lift • Mt Nebo Consulting, LLC

Welcome: 00:00

Welcome to this special episode of Leaders Lift. I'm your host Greg Cunningham and I'm, excited to share this episode. I'll also admit that I'm a bit nervous as to how this episode it going to turn out but I'm moving forward and since I'm recording, no turning back now.

Intro

In this week's special episode I want to go back and start at the beginning. What I'm attempting to do is to take the first 10 episodes plus the launch and other bonus episodes and pull in the best bits and try and weave them into some sort of a coherent story.

There are a couple of reasons I'm trying to do this. First, I wanted to see for myself if there is actually something coherent here. Meaning that I'm not just randomly throwing topics in some random order that you can't build on. I'm hoping as this episode goes on that if you are a leader (professional or otherwise) and were looking for personal development or to help with the development of others you will see that you can use the concepts from the first three months of the podcast to get off to an amazing start.

The second reason is that since this is a new podcast, I also wanted to provide a way for new listeners to figure out at least some of what they missed and to identify which episodes they want to go back to. I know when I have discovered a new podcast, it can feel overwhelming to try and figure out if I need to listen to every past episode (I've only done that once) or which ones would be most meaningful.

Now if you are wondering if this is for you, the answer is yes. I've used these principles and techniques as a parent, scout and youth leader, church leader and in hundreds of professional situations. I'm sure there is something in there for you. And as you listen through this episode you'd like to work through some of these concepts and have your own plan as a result of these topics - two things - first check out the wrap up so you can see what would be the outcome of doing so and then go to my website and check out my coaching services for more details. You can also email me at contact@mtneboconsulting.com to start the conversation.

Ok. Long intro and let's go ahead and get started.

Pre-Roll

Well, before that, just a reminder that if you haven't already, please subscribe or follow the podcast in whatever your favorite podcast player might be. I'd also appreciate it if you would share it (most podcast players have a share button and it generally looks like a square with an arrow pointing out of it). I'm also looking for feedback on the show. You can submit that at www.mtneboconsulting.com/survey. If you want other ways to be notified of new episodes, follow me on LinkedIn or Instagram (ldrslft).

Ok. Now that's enough of an intro. Let's get to the content already. Think of the rest of this episode as a leadership 101 course. I'll try and break it out into the lessons I would be using and let you know which episode the core content comes from. That way you can go back a listen. And if you find that this type of a course is exactly what you are looking for yourself or your team, reach out to me via the contact form on my website or by emailing contact@mtneboconsulting.com (I'll put both in the show notes).

Setting the Foundation: 05:22

First let's begin (launch episodes) by talking about and assessing your leadership foundation. Like almost everything in life, successful leadership must be built on a solid foundation. The goal for this section is to do an overiew and intro into some core leadership philosophies and foundations. Here is a recap:

From the What is Leadership Episode

I think best way to summarize what leadership should be is to list some key things that should be a part of real leadership. Here are a few that I would place on such a list:

§ The right motives

§ The right tools, knowledge and skills and the wisdom to use them

§ The right amount of confidence

§ True self-awareness

§ A drive to always be learning

§ A willingness to adapt

§ To really understand and internalize the idea that you lead people (and manage projects)

One of our key objectives as a leader should be to lift (ourselves and others). What does that mean? Lifting means you make a difference in whatever sphere of influence you have. That could be just yourself or it could be within a family, a team, an organization or a community. It also means helping others to live up to their potential and get the most out of life. If you are willing to focus on lifting, just maybe you'll have an opportunity to change the world just a bit.

From Leadership Foundations

Are you on board with what leadership should be? If you answer yes or even maybe, your next question might be how to build a solid foundation. This was the topif of the Leadership Foundations episode. You might not have to build it from scratch but in order to figure out where you are, you'll want to assess where you are right now. If you think about yourself as a leader, think about a few of these tiems.

First, what kind of lessons has life already taught you? Have you learned to work hard? Do you know what it means to do the right thing and are you willing to stand alone if needed to do so? How influenced are you by the sense of entitlement so prevalent in the world today? Do you know how to set and achieve goals? What about getting along with others? Is that difficult or does it come pretty easy? What about disagreeing without being disagreeable?

Those are the kinds of lessons I like to see leaders come to the table with. That doesn't mean you can't learn them as you go along, but it's sure easier if you learned them when you were younger.

Another part of your leadership foundation needs to be a solid understanding of, well, you. How can you hope to lead to your fullest potential if you don't know what that is? Several of the first ten episodes helped reinforce this and cover them in more detail in a bit but here are some foundational things you need to know about yourself. One good question to ask yourself is if you like to lead? Or are you just doing it because that's expected or it just has to be done. What parts of leadership do you like and which do you not like? What are your strengths and weaknesses? For those you can start with a high level self evaluation but I do recommend diving into your personality style which would include both plus communication style and a whole lot more. More on that here in just a bit. Finally, but maybe most important is asking yourself what you really want out of life and if you are on a path that will lead you there.

This last one may not stay the same for your entire life, and that's just fine. But knowing where you are headed means you can make a more deliberate decision in there here and now rather than just hoping that somehow by chance you might possibly sort of kind of get somewhere in life and maybe like where you end up.

If you have decided that leadership is a good path for you, immediately pause and evaluate the why's behind that. What I mean there is that you need to understand what your motives are for wanting to lead. You want your primary motives to be things like being part of a team, making a difference, etc. You may still have some of the potentially negative motives like wealth or fame, but those need to be subservient to the higher motives.

If you get through all of that, then know that you have started on the path. Remember that there is so much more to learn. If you are willing to continually learn, grow, stretch and adapt, then you will be able to keep moving down the path. Develop your natural curiosity. Don't settle for just being good. Seek out as much knowledge to help you down your path. Evaluate your willingness to take risks. If even the smallest risk is uncomfortable, get used to living outside your comfort zone. That's where some of the greatest things will happen.

And lastly, build a plan. No foundation will withstand time unless it was built according to a plan and it's maintained. You maintaing your foundation by doing the things I have just mentioned. I just recommend writing them down so you always have them to refer back to. Writing them down, digitally or otherwise, tends to solidify them in our minds and help them become a part of us.

From the State of Today's Leadership Episode

Why is this solid foundation important and what evidence do we have that it makes a difference? Well, without being too overly dramatic, the world is experiencing a crisis of leadership and I discussed this in detail in the State of Today's Leadership episode. Even since I launched the podcast things have gotten worse in a lot of areas. My take is that the biggest challenge here is that a large portion of today's leadership are wanting to lead for the wrong reasons.

Some of the wrong reasons to want to lead:

Fame and recognition

Power

Need to do things their way (ego)

Money

There are a lot of negative impacts that these types of motives can have on a leader and those around them, especially when these motives overrule all others. Those that are led by these kinds of leaders learn the wrong lessons, don't engage as much as they could, get burned out more quickly and get out of balance. The leaders themselves suffer from a lack of focus, look to the short term, look to solve the wrong problems and treat people as disposable resources. The organizations they lead bleed talent and resources and often are in the middle of a leadership carousel, fail to meet their potential and ultimately could become failed businesses.

From the Power of Being Positive

Now that I covered a whole bunch of negative, let's turn that coin over. We need to be positive. And the good thing is that if you recognize that you have a problem with some of the motives above, that's the first step and it's not too late to change. So go back and listen and build a plan. I'm happy to help with that if needed.

Beyond that, there is a lot to be optimistic about. There is a ton of potential in the world. One of the ways to tap that potential is to be more positive in your own sphere of influence.

We have so much negativity in our lives today. If you take in any sort of news (broadcast, podcast, youtube, social medai, news apps, etc.) the ratio of positive to negative is going to be way out of whack.

Our brains are actually trained to look for the negative things. They are hard wired to look for threats and then to either run or fight (think fight or flight response).

While this may be our natural response, we can train our brains to search for a more positive outlook on life. This requires deliberate effort but doing things like expressing gratitiude, identifying and writing down positives in our lives, etc. can re-train our brain to look for the positives when done over time. I've done this and I recommend you give it a try.

So those were the early launch episodes. All of them were designed to help you identify a secure foundation. If I were working with your team or even you as an individual, this would have been our first working session. All designed to establish a common foundation and to evaluate where you are currently. And as a bonus we might have had a few follow up items before diving into lesson two and that is about really getting to know yourself.

): 13:44

Episode 1 - Motives

When we talk about getting to know ourselves better, the first step is to understand what we want out of life and what are our core motivations. We all want something out of life and have different motivations even if we have the same goals. This is critical as it serves as the foundation for who you are trying to become and has a significant influence on your personality style and motives.

Ask yourself, what am I looking to accomplish in the future. What stage you are in life will determine how far ahead you want to look. For example, if you are just starting your career, you may want to focus a little more short term but have some longer term goals in mind. If you are a decade or so away from retirement, your goals need to stretch out to your retirement and what you want that to be like.

Learn to identify things you like to do, what you like to be a part of and what you enjoy accomplishing as well as the things you don't. Every step on our leadership journey is going to have a combination of these things so you need to know where you are willing to endure something you don't like for those things you do that are more important.

Triggers are something that pushes you into either a negative or even a default behavior or reaction. Thing about someone running their nails across a chalkboard. For a lot of people that triggers an instant physical reaction. In leadership, we could call these pet peeves, annoyances, etc. So what are your triggers? Pay attention over the next while and notice the things that stress you out, make your blood pressure rise or are just super annoying. Write them down and then decide which are negatively impacting your journey and work on it.

As you assess your motives, look for those that are generally positive and those that are potentially negative.

Positive examples

Making a difference

Being part of a team

Serving

Negative

Money, Fame power, pride and even you don't have a choice

We all have some of each of these so they key is to figure out which ones dominate and if they are causing issues. That's part of doing an honest self assessment. Once that is done, you can identify where to make changes, build a plan and start working towards being the new kind of leader you would like to be.

If we were working together you’re your leadership journey, this would be a simple questionnaire that I would have you honestly answer. I wouldn't necessarily need to see all of your answers but we would definitely discuss some of the key points. One of the great reasons to work with someone on this is to have someone to bounce ideas off, to bring in a new perspective and to help you think deeper about it.

We would also work together to build a plan. This would be a set of goals or objectives, how you are going to accomplish them, how I would support you and then how we would hold each other accountable. This is something you can do for those you lead, no matter if that is in a professional or personal standpoint. If you have kids getting ready to choose a college or career, think about how powerful this could be if they had you as a partner to work through it? And if you want someone to help you through your own personal journey, I'm here.

At this point in our course, you would have at least a draft plan to start working on. If you are already in a leadership position, and most of us are, then you want to take the principles that helped you understand your own motives and apply them to those you lead. You can observe what gets them excited and what does not, what triggers stress, what their natural strengths are and what their potential weaknesses might be. Once you learn to see these things in yourself, you can more accurately and effecitvely start identifying them in others.

Now all of this so far has been observation and self assessment based, both for you and then as you observe others. But we don't want to stop there unless you just want to be an ok leader. Do really keep heading down the path of most potential, you want to dive in even deeper. That's where personality styles come.

Episode 2 - Personality Styles

Episode 2 was all about personality style assessments. I covered the logistics around them and how you can take the information they give you and start applying it immediately in your life or how you can help others do so as well. These are still done on a self-assessment basis so be honest is one of the keys. I've found that when folks take these kinds of assessments they have to focus in order to really answer the questions in a way that reflects reality. Often they answer in they way they think they should be, want to be or the way others see them. That makes it more difficult to get the best value out of this kind of an assessment.

The personality assessment I'm having you take as part of this course is based on the MBTI personality types. I have been using a specific version of that assessment for several years. I've found it to be very comprehensive and I like to combine a personal and workplace assessment. There are a lot of overlaps between the two but you will find that you most likely have some differences in default behaviors in personal vs. professional environments.

And that's the key thing that you learn from this assessment - what are your default behaviors and how extreme might they be (this is super important).

A default behavior is something that is going to come very naturally to you. Our default behaviors also kick in when we are tired or under stress. Some default behaviors are positive are others are what I call potential pitfalls.

Let me summarize what default behaviors will be identified out of this assessment. If you want more details on these, I'd recommend starting with episode 2 and then hitting episode 3 where I talk through the results of my own assessment as an example for the kinds of things you will find.

First, you are going to find out if you are introvert or an extrovert. Most think this is about being a loner or wanting to be around people all the time. It's way more subtle than that. The reason you want to understand this in depth is about learning how to recharge your batteries. In today's world of burnout, always running at full throttle and all of the stressors coming from the economy and the world in general, your batteries are going to get depleted. Knowing the best way for you to recharge and which types of activities are likely to further drain your batteries is a skill that can transform your life. I covered this topic in depth in it's own episode and I'll talk about it a bit more later.

Second, you are going to understand if you are more practical vs. going on instinct. Do you go with your gut or are you more likely to look for facts and base your decisions off them. If you are going to make a decision under pressure, you are most likely to use one of these methods. They both have their pluses and minuses (too much facts could mean a delayed decision and not enough fact and too much gut could be a very uninformed decision). Do you know what your default is? Can you use the other style if needed?

Third, you are going to get a better idea of where you fall as far as being more logical and objective vs. more emotion based. Some say that this is the touchy feel part of your personality. I don't think that is exactly right. It's more about what do you default to. For me, knowing where I'm at on this spectrum is key as I aspire to be the kind of leader that can show appropriate objectivity and compassion. That's a mix of both of these.

Fourth is the understand whether you are a planner or more of a go with the flow kind of person. Most people know almost immediately which of these two is their default. If you are too extreme on the planning side then you may have more difficult being in a constant state of change. If you are more go with the flow, structured environments might be tougher for you.

As we look at your results together, we would be talking about the key insights. We would also discuss which portions you agree with and which don't really make sense to you. We all have those in our reports. But then we would focus on my re-occuring them which is to build a plan and write things down. More about that in a second.

Episode 4

Let's continue on with lesson two. This is an extension of the personality styles discussion and helps us make sure the plan that we are building has the right balance. That was the focus of episode 4. I stated it with a cuation that the deeper you go into your personality style assessment and building your plan, the more important it is to ensure it's in balance. This is one area where having someone to work with can help out.

When we work on something like this on our own, it's real easy to go to either a positive or negative extreme. What that means is that we either put a positive spin on everything in our assessment and we are left with a very superficial plan. Or we tend to make everything out to be major weaknesses and our plan because so weighed down with negativity that it's like carrying a backpack full of rocks up a mountain side. It's hard to make progress and if you do make it, was the journey really worth it? I mean, does the mountain need more rocks.

So the approach we would take is to identify your key strengths and then key potential pitfalls. I don't like using the word weaknesses. It's too negative. Pluse not all pitfalls are created equal. Some are impactful and others are just minor annoyances.

The approach we would take with your potential pitfalls is to identify those that are most impactful right now or in the very near future. We would then build a plan to mitigate those potential pitfalls. The plan would include things like when the pitfalls are most likely to show up, what would be there impact and then how we could make them be less impactful. What we would not do is work on a plan to completely overcome those pitfalls. Remember these are our default behaviors so the amount of effort required to completely overcome or avoid a pitfall is most likely not worth it. What you want to do is put in enough efforr that those pitfalls are not fatal and won't throw you off track and then we would move onto the other portion of the plan which is how to take enhance and take advantage of your strengths. That's where the real magic happens. If you can avoid falling into any fatal pitfalls and then take one or more of your strengths and run with them, you will find yourself running down the path of most potential.

As this point in our leadership development course, it's probably time to take a breath and work on thing for a bit so this would be the end of lesson or phase two. At this point you should have a much deeper understanding of who you are currently as a leader, where you want to go and have a plan in place to help you get there. And just like the other topics we have covered, if you can effectively do that for yourself, you can start applying the same principles with those you lead.

Mid-Roll

Before I move into the next episode (or next phase of our leadership 101 course), I do want to remind you to hit that subscribe or follow button. Also, I'm presenting the episode today as if I was taking you through a leadership development class. If you find yourself thinking that this would be something that would be great to work through with some, don't hesitate to reach out. Use the contact form on my website.

Also, when I released the episode on personality styles, I had a promo for a discounted personality style package. I'll still honor that package today. Simply fill out the form on my website and mention this special in the goals section. Or email contact@mtneobconsulting.com and let me know you want the personality package special and we will work out the details.

Relationships & Trust: 24:46

Episode 5

In episode 5 (next part of the course) let's start to transition away from ourselves just a bit and started focusing more on others. Up until this point in our leadership course we started with you first and then expanded out. Now we are going to move into more of a parallel approach. And we would start off by talking about getting a new perspective on the key relationships in our lives. With this "new" knowledge about your own personality style, motives and with a better understand of what you want to get out of life, you can start evaluating those key relationships in your life and what adjustments you need to make to keep heading down your path of most potential.

The reason this is a parallel effort (evaluating yourself and others) is because relationships by nature involve more than just you. So you need to understand yourself and the others involved. Relationships are also probably one of the greatest sources of happiness and stress in our lives. So this topic is definitely worth our time.

One of the thing we should regularly do is evaluate if the key relationships (and maybe all of them) are adding value to our lives or doing the opposite. This is not an easy thing to do and takes some courage. It means looking at personal and professional relationships and being honest about the impact those relationships have on you. Bosses, co-workers, family members, friends, etc. all are a part of this. Now that you understand yourself and others a bit better, you might see these relationships differently.

Once you have done the evaluation, then it's time to figure out what to do about it. Just like when we discussed strengths and potential pitfalls, you may need to address both sides of this. If you have key relationships that must continue but are struggling then, you need to figure out a plan for how to improve those relationships. Let's say you have an amazing job but you just have this one co-worker that you can't seem to mesh with. If you want to to stay there, then you take the things you learned about personality styles, motives, etc. and figure out what you can do to improve the relationship on your end. The focus should be on what you can do differently to improve things. Like many potential pitfalls, you may never change this relationship into a strength, but if you can improve it enough, then you can go back to the other relationships that are enhancing your life.

As for developing a plan, it's pretty simple. List out the key relationships that you want to make changes in. Identify a few things you can start working on and then get to it.

As you work through your plan I would council you to remember just a few things. First, work on building up trust (that's next) so that you can at least give some benefit of the doubt. Be humble and remember that you can only change yourself. So look for the things you can do. And then, know that in some cases, you may need to learn how to agree to disagree. That's not an easy thing to do in today's world which seems to get more and more polarized. But I think we would all be surprised at how much things could change if we could sincerely and effectively agree to disagree and compromise.

One more thing I would encourage you to do is that if there are any relationships in your life that do more harm than good, figure out what to do with those first. Sometimes that means moving on from that relationship (think about a toxic boss and how refreshing it is to find a job with a boss that truly cares). Sometimes that could also mean getting some professional help. That's where courage comes in. The courage to do what is best for you when it comes to relationships.

Episode 6

Now underlying all important relationships in our lives should be a foundation of trust. That's the only way these relationships can be successful, meaningful and help all involved move towards their fullest potential. And before we can identify how to build trust where needed, we need to get on the same page as to what trust is. Episode 6 cover this and then was to build and restore trust.

From a personal standpoint, I think about trust on multiple levels. I think about trusting someone with my life for example. But I also think about trusting that those close to me are looking out for me. That they will let me know if I'm headed down a bad path. That they will be there for me if I need them. That I can share my fears, struggles, weaknesses, etc. with them without fear of being criticized. Essentially I am trusting them to help me get the most out of life. I'm giving up come the control that I'd like to think I have over my life and putting it in their hands.

In a professional environment, a lot of the same principles apply but there also needs to be the ability to trust that those around you are going to do there best to do their part and that they want you to succeed and are willing to help you do so.

Those are the highlights of the kind of trust you want to build in the key personal and professional relationships you have in your life. So if we go back to the list of relationships, we should be able to identify those where you want to build more trust. And then we can start talking about ways to build and restore trust.

If we focus on what you can do to build trust where there isn't much yet, say in a new relationships like with a new employee or a new friend, here are some of the things that will help build trust. First is integrity, reliability and consistency. All three of those combined help those around you understand how you will act on a regular basis. In addition, you want to demonstrate transparency, humility and vulnerability. That is done by not hiding or sugar coating things, apologizing when you make mistakes and admitting that you have weaknesses. Once you have set that kind of an example, you then can help others do some of these things. You can encourage them to disagree with you and make it safe to do so. In other words, don't go ballistic when they disagree with this amazing idea you have. And then finally, trust them. That' goes the furthest. If they feel like you trust them, not just because you say so but through your actions, then are more likely to reciprocate.

Now some of the relationships may need to have trust restored. It could be that you need to restore their trust in you or that you want to trust them more. Well, there are ways that you can do both of those things.

First, if you need to restore trust

You need to identify what you did to reduce trust. It could be something simple or something big. And then you need to figure out why it happened. Hopefully with the new knowledge you have about personality styles and motives, this will be prove to be a more meaningful exercise. And then figure out what you can do differently in the future.

Now it's time to figure out what you can do (you can only control yourself) to set things straight. Whatever you do, it needs to be sincere and deliberate. A half-hearted, meaningless apology with no follow up will most likely make things worse. A sincere apology is required and that apology should recognize what happened and that you are taking ownership of it and what you are proposing to do to make amends and how you will do better in the future. Just do what you committed to do. So that would be built into the plan for any relationships where you want to restore trust.

Now for those relationships where you hope to have others restore trust.

helping others to regain our trust is probably more difficult than working to regain the trust of someone else. This is even more difficult if it really is a critical relationship and/or if the trust violation is deep. But if we expect others to trust us after we make mistakes, we must be willing to do the same thing.

The way I want to approach this is to assume that we as leaders are going to take the initiative to work on the restoration of trust instead of waiting for the other offending party to come to us.

The first key is going to be communication.So what needs to be a part of that communication - facts, honesty, transparency and sincerity. You also need to be willing to share what you are willing to do to help restore trust and what you would like them to do to restore trust. And then finally, you need to be willing to give them a real opportunity to make amends. That includes not writing them off when it doesn't go perfectly as quickly as you'd like or if you run into any other road bumps.

Developing and maintain true trust is not easy and takes constant work. If it was easy, our world would be so much different today. But at least now you know where you are going to work on trust and have some ways that you can work with your team on developing it as well.

- Potential: 33:09

Ok. So you understand yourself better, you are focused on the key relationships in your life (professional or otherwise) and are building trust. You should be able to look back and see progress on a path that hopefully leads to you getting the most out of life and living up to your potential. This doesn't apply only for you, but also for those you lead, whether that be a team, a family, friends, or anyone you may have influence over. This is where we get to the core of what it means that Leaders Lift.

If this development plan we are developing seems like a lot of work, that's because it is. There is so much more we can get out of life if we are willing to put in the effort. People rarely live up to their fullest potential because either they don't know just how high they can go or they decide they don't want to put in the effort. And I guess, that begs the question, how can you really know how high you can go if you are still at the beginning of the journey? You can't. But what you can do is see far enough down the path and start moving forward. And the closer you get to that initial view of your potential, the vision beyond that will clear up and I believe you will see just how much more there is for you. That can only happen if we do a good job of identifying our initial potential and then put in the work to get there. This was the focus of episode 7.

Let's start by discussing the ways we can identify potential in ourselves and others.

First evaluating personal potential. We absolutely need to do this for ourselves. You can use the various techniques I discussed in the knowing yourself episodes. Once we have some idea on our own path, we can then help others on theirs. Just a word of caution here. When it comes to personal potential, I don't recommend being the judge of what someone else's potential might be. Even in a professional environment, leaders should be cautious about determining overall potential. As the leader, you definitely can determine if the individual has the potential in their current position but be careful beyond that. Ultimately, I believe as leaders we should support others in determining their potential but allow them to make the final call. We can provide advice, guidance and support, but ultimately it needs to be their decision.

Once we have a good idea of our potential, we can evaluate if our goals and potential align and make appropriate course corrections

When evaluating professional potential, all of the above definitely apply. But beyond that you also need to evaluate some of the things that are specific to the job. First would be the current skill set. Look at soft and hard skills, but don't get hung up only on the skills that they are current using to do their job. You want to look at those things that may not be quite as obvious. You need to evaluate their potential to learn new skills because that is part of how far they can go. You also need to look at current situation - things like their current position, what opportunities may be available in the company or industry. This will all need to be consider as you build a plan to help them move towards their potential. And that's the next part of our discussion.

Helping others move forward

The best plan can do wonders to help someone see that meeting their potential is within their grasp. Sometimes others also need to be inspired to see and then put in the effort to reach their potential. And sometimes, we as leaders need others to reach their potential if we are going to do the same. This doesn’t' happen if you employ the old school command and control style of leadership. What you need is to build trust, inspire them to move forward and then support them as they do so. We have already covered trust so let's talk about inspiration and support.

Eleanor Roosevelt said "A good leader inspires people to have confidence in the leader; a great leader inspires people to have confidence in themselves." So that's where we start. Helping them to build the confidence in their ability to meet their potential and get what they want out of life.

We can do that by helping them build a plan and then providing the right amount of support, handing back the marker (get them started on solving the problem but don't do it for them (really, go back and listen to episode 7) and creating an environment that is intense but not tense. That means that you set expectations for best efforts but don't overreact and punish when best efforts don't yield the desired results.

Ok. Got it all down so far? What's next now that you have identified potential and those you lead? Well, lets build the team in a way that move everyone down the path of most potential.

- Team Building: 37:56

Working with yourself or another individual towards their potential is a great place to start. But many of us are being asked to lead a team in that direction as well. So how do we take those principles we have learned about helping ourselves or individuals and apply it to a team. Episode 8 dove in deep here.

Some of the core team building foundations you will need to master include what we have talked about already (trust, knowing yourself and others, building relationships and identifying potential) as well as some more practical items.

You need to understand who your first team is. That's the team whose priorities take precedence over all others. In most professional environments, that's going to be your bosses team and priorities. In life, I prioritize my relationship with God and my wife first. Kids and others fall into place after.

You also need to master the ability to set clear direction. The more layers in the org you lead, the more difficult this can be but it is also more crucial. You also need to get good at being positive and optimistic. I don't mean that everything comes up smelling roses, but you want to be optimistic that no matter what is going on, you and your team can handle it.

If you have a good start on these principles then it's time to build a plan. Yes another one. This time though you want to prepare a multi-layered plan. You want to have individual development plans for the each person you lead (similar to what we are doing for you) but then you need to add onto that a plan for the team. The team plan will have similar elements like strengths and potential pitfalls (and maybe some gaps) and then the ways the team as a whole will take advantage of those strengths and mitigate the potential pitfalls. It should also includes ways to build trust and strengthen relationships.

Then you need to work on getting buy-in. Not consensus. If you have a diverse, high performing team, consensus will be unlikely. But you do want the team to buy in, all of them. You do that by building trusting, setting a clear direction and giving everyone a voice. Sometimes to give everyone a voice, you have to learn to draw out those introverts.

Then let the team execute and provide support don't do it for them. You may be tempted to dive in when things don't go well but resist that urge. Don't help them so much that they don't learn and grow. Help them become self-reliant.

Ready for a breather? Well, let's wrap up one more topic. You'll be happy to know that there is no real plan around this one. This is more about awareness and a technique to help improve all that we have talked about.

- Our Stories: 40:36

Going a bit out of episode order here, as episode 10 would be next on my list since during the whole course you have been telling yourselves stories. And maybe even you started to wonder if you actually had what it takes to be a leader and if you will ever be good at all these things we have talked about and if you have any hope of successfully following that plan - that's the imposter syndrome coming out.

So let's learn how to deal with imposter syndrome and the other kinds of stories we tell ourselves.

First, the kinds of stories we tell ourselves - we tell stories about ourselves, about others and about situations. Then we mix and match all three of them. In this sense, a story is not a lengthy discourse but could be something as simple as a single thought. These stories determine the color of the lenses through which we view life. Rose colored glasses, sunglasses or our own personal prescription lenses. The rose lenses come on when the stories we tell make things look better than they really are. Sunglasses make things darker (generally putting a negative spin). While our personal prescription lenses are what bring things into focus.

Imposter syndrome comes when we tell ourselves stories that definitely are sunglass influenced. This is when we feel like we aren't qualified, don't deserve or are worried someone is going to find us out to be a fraud. It's most often a completely false narrative.

With these stories, we need to learn to manage them. We recognize them, analyze, categorize (rose, sun or prescription) and then work to change the narrative as needed. For imposter syndrome, you need to do this quickly and reframe it into a positive before it gets hold of you.

So as you work through this plan, work with others and face new and challenging situations, be conscious of the stories going through your head.

- Dialing it back: 42:44

To wrap up the course, you already have plenty of plans to work on for the next several weeks or more, I want to leave with a key message. I cover it at the end of the course (this is episode 9) so that it sticks in your brain. What a lot of true leaders and high potentials do after going through a course like this is slam the gas pedal to the ground and just go go go. We come out of the gates with so much energy and don't want to lose it. Plus if you're like me, patience is definitely a potential pitfall. But we can't move that fast forever so learning to give yourself and others permission to dial it back is the concluding lesson.

Development like this takes time. And depending on the plan, it could take a lot of time. The same thing goes with those you lead. And it's not as if this is the only thing you have to focus on. You still have operations to run (even running a family is an operation), performance to manage, goals to achieve, changes to adapt to and everything else that just goes along with life.

So with all of that, learn when, how and why to dail it back. And give yourself permission to do so. And give those you lead permission to do the same. We all have times in our lives when we need to recharge or take a break. In today's world, we hesitate to do so. Think about how much vacation time you have that goes unused. Or for the mother that is afraid to tell her husband she needs a few hours just to herself.

You have to learn for yourself and those you lead, what the signs of burnout are. And maybe not even that, just the signs for when even a small break would be beneficial. Eating lunch at your desk everyday (I'll admit I'm eating while I write this sentence) may not be the best thing. Not taking your vacation time, or staying home for when sick or something similar could have adverse effects. And don't think you have to take a month off (that would be way too much for me). It could be a long weekend like I'm trying to take this weekend, or taking your lunch or a walk during the middle of the day. Your situation and personality style will be key to helping you understand this.

For example, recharging your batteries. Dialing it back is all about recharging batteries and we all do that very differently. Most people go throughout life without even realizing that certain things drain them and others recharge them. But once you do, this is another area where you can make deliberate decisions to positively impact your life. If you are an introvert, you are going to recharge differently than the extroverts in your life. I recommend you have some go to activities that help you reacharge. My daily is an outdoor walk or bike ride. I also like to read and fiddle around on my ipad. I also spend time in a place of peace (the Temple) on a weekly basis. When I need a deeper recharge, that's where camping comes in. Maybe these will give you a few ideas.

In fact, since we have your plan ready to go, let's add one final thing. Your list of simple recharge activities and then your initial plan for a deeper recharge. You are going to need it.

Wrap Up: 45:58

So what do you have at the end of all of this? What does your personal leadership development plan look like? What does the development plan for those you lead look like? Let's recap:

First, you understand what leadership is and how strong your foundation is. You also have some items on you list to strengthen that foundation.

Second, you have a much deeper understanding of what you want out of life and your motives. You also have your personality style report that we have reviewed and you have identified ways to enhance key strengths and mitigate potential pitfalls. You also have a better understanding of how to evaluate some of these things for those you lead as well.

Third, you have a list of the key relationships in your life. You have identified those where some work is needed and any where trust needs to be strengthened or restored.

Fourth, you also have a better understanding of trust and ways that you can build and restore trust. And again, you also have some action items to help you with trust with those around you.

Fifth, you have a clearer view of what your potential is and the potential of some of those around you. You also have a better understanding of how important it is for you to work toward your potential and to help those around you do the same thing. If you want the most of out of life, you have to be working towards your potential.

Sixth, you have personal development plans for yourself, the individuals you lead and your team. This is what you will be working on for the next however long.

Seventh, you have an understanding of the stories you have been and will be telling yourself as you continue on this journey. Don't let the sunglasses darken your view and enthusiasm.

Eighth, you know that this is going to take time and that you and those you lead need to learn how to dial it back when needed. Give yourself and them permission to do so.

Finally, you have me here to provide support, help you problem solve (I will hand back the marker) and to hold you to your commitments and best efforts.

Ok. Let me step back into podcast host mode now. How does this recap sound to you? Are you thinking it's a lot? Is it something you wish you had time for? Is it something you can see the value in, but not sure how to really make it happen? Have I peaked your interest enough that you are ready to go?

For all of these, let me repeat that final statement - you have me here to provide support, help you problem solve (I will hand back the marker) and to hold you to your commitments and best efforts. If you would like to have someone work through this with you or your team, then please don't hesitate to reach out. This kind of an approach can make such a different in your life and those around you.

Some of you may be thinking that this really only applies in a professional setting. It doesn't. The principles are the same if you are just trying to figure out what to do with your life in general or in almost any other personal situation. I'm here for both.

Post-Roll

Thanks for tuning in today. I'd love to know what you think of this episode. The survey is still up on my website or just reach out via email, Instagram or LinkedIn with any thoughts or comments that you have.

Please don't forget to hit that subscribe or follow button so you can be notified as we continue down this journey together. Share the show, give me a rating or a review wherever you listen to podcasts.

And if you would like to go through an actual leadership development program with me, or would even be interested in a development plan template that is based on this episode, you can email contact@mtneboconsulting.com or use the contact form on my website. I'll have links to all of this in the show notes.

Thanks again. Now go out there and keep lifting.

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