I'm thrilled to introduce you to our amazing guest, Laura Pfeiffer. Today, we're talking all about embracing our unique paths as women while we navigate the exciting journey of motherhood. Whether you're a current mom, an aspiring one, or still deciding, you're in the right place! With over 20 years of entrepreneurial experience, Laura's journey as a dedicated business owner and a loving wife and mother, including parenting a special needs child, has been nothing short of extraordinary. Her personal quest for balance, joy, and self-love ignited a passion for coaching other women, guiding them from doubt and depletion to empowerment and healing – just as she did for herself.

Tune in as Laura and I delve into the essence of pivoting, change, and how they differ from failure. We explore the diverse array of businesses Laura has managed and how she's gracefully navigated each venture. As a mom, Laura offers profound insights into the unique dynamics of parenting a child with special needs. She shares heartwarming advice on how moms of children without special needs can extend their support, kindness, and friendship to those who do and the vital lessons she wishes all parents could teach their kids.

We dig deep into the power of mindset and confidence, how they fuel action and success, and why they're essential for every mom. This conversation is a game-changer, full of wisdom, relatable experiences, and heartfelt anecdotes that will leave you feeling uplifted, motivated, and ready to conquer your own goals! Join us as we unpack the beauty of embracing ourselves as both individuals and moms. Let's learn, grow, and celebrate the incredible journey of motherhood together!

What you'll hear in this episode:

[2:40] How Laura became a TV host and producer.

[6:00] The importance of taking time to be present.

[12:15] How to navigate the pressure to be happy.

[17:10] How to get out of numbness and overwhelm.

[21:40] Balancing social media and the business side.

[24:30] The betrayal of social media.

[29:10] Ways to empower your child.

[33:30] Teaching kindness and open-mindedness to your children.

CONNECT WITH LAURA

Follow Laura: @laurapfeiffercoaching

Check out her offerings on her website: https://www.laurapfeiffercoaching.com/

CONNECT WITH KELSEY

Follow Kelsey: @thisiskelseysmith

Follow Momma Has Goals: @mommahasgoals

Download the app for Apple or Android

Learn more at https://thisiskelseysmith.com/

Use the code Kelsey for $50 off your ticket to EmpowerHER Live: https://www.kaciaghetmiri.com/empowerher-live

Join our text list. Text "Goals" to (707) 347-0319

Speaker 1 0:00

But her diagnosis and what she goes through and what she experiences is her story. So I don't ever disclose that or talk about that publicly because I feel that that's her story. And that really empowers her because now she can share it if she wants to. She can talk about it when she's ready.

Kelsey Smith 0:19

Let's reimagine mom life together. Mama high schools is your hub for relatable support and helpful resources that help you fuel yourself alongside motherhood. Your identity is bigger than mom, in whatever your goals are. Together, we're making them a reality. This community is built up of women have so many different goals and lives and how they navigate it. But the one thing that brings us all together is we are all either current aspiring or trying to decide if a motherhood is for us. And we all resonate with this idea of being us and being mom and our guest today showcases this in such a beautiful way and not only does she do it for herself, but she helps others too. And moms with an extra special layer. Laura is the host of moms who rock talk show on Phoenix TV. She is the founder of Laura Pfeiffer coaching Laura has over 20 years of entrepreneurial experience both as an independent business owner and an award winning multi unit franchisee her passion was found in her coaching and consulting. And as a wife and mother to a special needs child confined to a wheelchair and career oriented woman. She took a very personal journey years ago to find love and joy and balance within herself. She now loves working with other women and moms to shift their perspective from feeling unworthy, doubtful, depleted to instead feeling empowered, healed, worthy and loved just like she did. She has been coaching people in their life and business for over 15 years. And she also is an advocate for parents of children with special needs. I absolutely love this conversation, we talk about the difference between pivoting and changing versus failure. We talk about the many businesses that Laura has owned and navigated, we also talk about what it means to be a mom and navigating life but also a mom of a special needs child. We talk about how moms of non special needs children can support special needs children be kind, have an open hand become friends, things that she wished other parents taught their kids. And we also talk about how we all need to work on our mindset and confidence and how that breeds into action and success. This is such an amazing conversation. I cannot wait for you to listen in. Check it out. Laura, thank you so much for being here. I am so excited to have this conversation. Sometimes I wish I click record a little bit faster to just gather the conversation before we click. But I would love for you to just bring us up to speed on one of your biggest accomplishments on paper. So many people meet someone and like you have a TV show. How did you even get into that? Like how did you get started? And so I would love for you to take us back to how did you become a TV host? And producer?

Speaker 1 3:14

Yeah, thank you so much for having me, Kelsey, I appreciate it. I think on paper that would be probably one of my biggest accomplishments is being on TV and being a host and having my own show. But personally, my biggest accomplishment I think would be being a mom and a wife. So on paper though you're right, the TV show is probably the biggest thing. And how that came to be was I'm sure you've heard of like on your vision board, or all your goals out there and what you want to have in life. So that was never on my vision board. But I'm also one of those people that believes in as you take steps things just present themselves. And if it makes sense, roll with it and go with it. I've actually asked because of the coaching that I do. And the moms that I work with, I was asked to write an article to be featured. And so I wrote the article and the publishing company that does the magazine. They were in the process of putting the platform together to host TV shows. And they were like, Would you be interested in hosting a show? And I was like, What do you mean, that's like an actual TV show where I have to be in front of people and the interviewing people on camera for a lot of people to see, it was like that. Are you sure but at the same time, if it makes sense, I'll do it. And so I'm like, What do I have to talk about in there? Like you get to pick and I was like, Okay, I'm in. Because this to me was like the perfect platform to be able to showcase the moms of special needs kids that have incredible stories, the ones that I was literally coaching with, but don't really have an outlet, and they've gone through some incredible things. And I really saw it as a way for me to be able to share their stories. So that's how it all started.

Kelsey Smith 4:47

So we'll just dig into the details of right now where everyone can find that show. So it's moms who rock and you talk about stories of all these amazing moms and families and women. Where can everyone tune in it airs on

Speaker 1 4:59

Fridays at Two Oh, pm central it is on the Phoenix TV channel. And it's on every major streaming platform. So you can find it on Roku TV, Apple TV and Amazon Fire TV. So they just have to go to the Phoenix channel and then find my show moms who rock.

Kelsey Smith 5:15

So, so cool. I want to talk a little bit more about just like your day to day and how you manage this. So you have a special needs daughter, you're married, you have this business that's outside of your TV show, then you have this TV show on top of that, what are some of the things that you do to care for yourself to just show up for you to be able to hold all of this and have these conversations because something that I've noticed is it's a really energetically I don't even want to say depleting just, it takes a lot of energy to be a person but then also to have these conversations. So when you're meeting with these other women that you're either coaching, or they're on the show, you're really feeling all of the things that they're going through. So how do you show up for yourself?

Speaker 1 6:01

Yeah, that's a really good question. You know, for a lot of years, I've been an entrepreneur since I graduated from college. So I've always had businesses and I realized, actually, probably not until a couple years ago, that I really didn't fill myself back up, I never took time to fill my cup. And that is one of the things that I do coaching work with mom, Donna, specifically, because we don't realize that we're not doing that until we're at the point of complete exhaustion and depletion, and we have nothing left to get which actually happens more frequently than we might even realize, I really make a purposeful points to do certain things throughout my day. I'm really intentional about the time that I spend to and it doesn't have to be a lot. I think that's one thing that a lot of women and moms get hung up on from my own personal experience, we think it takes a lot of time to give to yourself. And it really does it. Because if you're doing just a little bit each day, it all compounds right, it all adds up. One of the major things that I do every morning is I take maybe 10 minutes, I try to do at least 30 And just like meditate or be in an area where I can be by myself and be quiet. Yeah, I prefer to do it in the morning because everyone's still like asleep, and it's quiet, I haven't checked email they haven't gotten into like my business does, I'm still just with myself, if that makes sense. So I make sure that I do that every morning to have that time. But there are days where maybe I can't squeeze in that time for whatever reason. And but I will make sure that sometimes throughout the day, maybe if it's only for 10 minutes that I at least have a chance to go outside and sit in the grass, or I can read a book literally just that little bit of time to myself helps me to center back in and remember who I am as a woman, and not necessarily with all my other titles.

Kelsey Smith 7:41

Yeah, so good. Because while we love those other titles, we are a person outside of all of those things. And I love that you talk about just spending time with yourself. Because sometimes people are like, I'm not a meditator, I don't meditate, and that's okay. But you might want to try it out. But if you don't, it's been something that's been really challenging for me, I'm not a great meditator, I see the value in it, I see the data, I can totally get behind it. But it is challenging. So sitting and just having some time where you're like, present with yourself is so so big.

Speaker 1 8:13

Let me preface I'm not good at it. I just take the time to sit with myself. One thing that I've learned is like, you don't have to be good at meditating. And you don't have to even call it that. Just take 10 minutes to yourself. That's what I said, sometimes I just go sit in the graph, right? It's just that time by myself doing something I like is really what it is.

Kelsey Smith 8:28

Yeah. So you talked about entrepreneurship after college? I know you've had such a transition through the years, take us through what that's looked like what has been some of the biggest learnings and challenges in shifting the type of businesses that you've gone through? And did you ever think you'd see yourself coaching women and moms at the beginning of your entrepreneurial journey? Did you even know like what coaching was or online business or what your opportunities were?

Speaker 1 8:56

It's funny that you asked that because No, I never thought that I would be coaching mom, specifically are moms with special needs kids. And I think one of the things that really stands out for me is I've always coached people, if that makes sense, but not as my career being paid for it. And I was, in every sport you can imagine, in high school and such so naturally, that some of those leadership qualities that have just come out through that and people always look to me for advice or things that help them with whatever it was that they were going through. So I was naturally coached people even though I wouldn't have called it that back then, through all of my years of having businesses, I just, I always felt that there was like a nudge for me to do something more and to do something connected to me as a person, if that makes sense. But I didn't know what that meant. And I wasn't quite understanding what the nudge was. And I could feel it that something was pulling at me and I think honestly it was me needing to come and share my experiences and what I've been through but honestly At that time, I was like, that poll was more of you're just not being fulfilled in this career or having this business. So let's look for something else. And I did that multiple times, I was like, Okay, this business just might not be it because I'm not feeling whole. And so I was like, Okay, let me switch industries. So I switched industries and started another business, or I sold that one, and then did something else from the ground up and build that up. And I was like, kept feeling that little bit of like, emptiness, and you just don't feel completely fulfilled. So I just kept going to the next thing, and the next thing and the next thing, and people do that with jobs, too, or relationships, they really can apply to anything. In my case, it was in my career in the businesses that I owned. And it finally hit me at one point, because I started coaching, but in a way where I was more coaching people from the business side of things, like helping them in their business and helping them grow their business, I loved it, I love being able to help them make changes and see the difference that it was making. And I was like, Okay, I'm onto something here. But then I started to get this, like, almost, it's not even like an itch in your throat. But it sounds constantly coughing and like having to clear my throat, like, what is happening. And so I went to a mentor that I have, and she was like, maybe you're not actually saying what you're supposed to be saying. I'm a person who understands energy and believes in the chakras and things like that. So I, I get that our body reacts to things that happen to us based on what we think about. And so I was like, Okay, maybe she's onto something, maybe I'm not actually saying what I want to be saying or speaking my truth. And I was like, Okay, but what does that mean? And so I kept feeling that tug. And I was like, You know what, maybe I am supposed to be helping moms. And I haven't shared my experiences or my life as a mom. In a really long time, the show had come into play at this point, too, in the middle of all of this. So I'm really loving what I'm doing and helping these moms and sharing their stories. I said, maybe that's part of it. But I'm not giving or sharing enough of myself. Because I think that maybe someone can learn from what I've been through. And as soon as I shifted and changed my whole entire coaching from working with people that were in business to helping and working with moms and moms of special needs kids, within eight months, no longer and clearing my throat, or coughing. Wow.

It reminds me of a couple things. One, so many people do step into motherhood with that desire, there's some people end up in motherhood. And they're like, I don't know, I didn't, I'm not really sure that I even really wanted to be a mom. And maybe I'm happy I am now. But others have longed for that. And then it happens. And they realize they're not fulfilled with just that. And I think on the business ownership side, or even the career side, I have friends that have gone to school for years, whether it's to be a doctor or a lawyer, and you could even have just gone to school for two years, but you've worked towards something and then you get there and you're like, Wait a second. This isn't actually everything that I thought it would be and you might not even not like it like you said, it wasn't that you were like, I don't like this. I'm just missing something. I just need something else. Also, how did you navigate pivoting versus feeling like you were failing? In the sense of those were successes, you created success. But sometimes when we don't continue one thing, really I don't think it's us that make us feel that bad. It's this societal pressure of my supposed to just see this through? Is this supposed to be my forever? How did you gain the confidence to make those shifts?

I think part of it not only is the societal pressures that we feel, but I do think we put pressure on ourselves as well, we impose such high standards on ourselves, which isn't a bad thing. But we also need to give ourselves some grace. Because we actually make ourselves feel like failures for decisions that we make. And I realized, and I've always believed in coaches, I've always had a coach for whatever part of my life that I was going through, I believe there's always something that someone else can see that we can't see ourselves when we're that close to it. So I've always had coaches, I believe in coaches. So one of the things that helped me is getting that outside perspective. And when I realized that, that I can't look at everything as me making a decision as me starting over or as me as not being where I wanted to be. I just looked at it as like next chapter, I wasn't a failure. It's just when we go try on a swimsuit, for example, we don't say that we failed when we put on the red one, because we liked the blue one better. We don't know what we'd like until we know what we don't like we need that contrast in our life. So one doesn't necessarily mean success. And one doesn't necessarily mean failure. And that's really how I needed to look at it because I was just trying to find things that made me feel fulfilled. And ultimately what that really was was to be happy when some people really get caught up in like, why keep starting over. And I'm supposed to be here by now according to who. Right? So we put that all limitation and an own standard on ourselves because that's our expectation. And it's not bad to have an expectation But we need to give ourselves some grace to allow us to make a change and switch it up. It doesn't mean that what we did was bad or that we made a bad choice or a bad decision, we're very quick to criticize ourselves. And I think we just need to look at it from a different perspective. So for me, it was just a matter of, okay, next chapter, like, what's up for me next, and I really looked at it more from a sight of excitement to see what was coming into my path. Yeah,

I'm that way too. And I feel like it did take some shifting of accepting paths to really be a in the love of just living right now. I'm like, this is just life, we're just living, I have no idea where we're going, I have no idea what we're doing. But this feels good right now. And in the next season, it may feel different. But with the women you coach, if they're a little more challenged by change, or risk adverse, and they can't just fall in love with the journey, and they're really focused on those milestones, what are some of the ways you would help that person be more okay with the unknown, and just taking that next step,

they have to be ready, we can't make anyone see what they're not willing to see. That's probably the biggest step is like people want to have change in their life. And it doesn't mean that it has to be big change. A lot of people are risk adverse, they don't like changing things up. But I find that a lot of the women that I coach with, they're literally at that point, in some cases where they're like, they're just exhausted, and they're tired of going through the motions every day, they just want something different. When I coach and work with those women, it's more of finding, like, if it's their job, and I completely satisfied with it's not a matter of quitting that job. And then we'll start looking for something else that fulfills you, right? Like, there's a lot of baby steps and things that we just start injecting, so to speak into their daily life, to give themselves that place of, I'm gonna say relief, because a lot of times, there's not relief there. And so part of that is what we talked about the beginning is giving themselves that opportunity to steal their cup, because the reason that they're not enjoying life and living life and just taking things as they come is because there are so stringent on everything that's happening in their daily life, and they're giving no time to themselves.

Yeah. And that can be so hard when you're feeling like you can't even feel like we were just saying the living and being in love with the journey. When you're numbed out from just life, checking the boxes, and making sure everyone's Fed are where they need to be on time, the things that you have to do, or that we get to do once you get out of that kind of numbness, and you get excited again about the opportunity to be a mom to help care for others. But you're also taking care of yourself just as equally, if not more, then you can start looking for those lights and that lightness also of life and joy again, but when people are feeling so heavy, and they just don't even know where to start, like maybe someone isn't ready for that change yet, but they're listening still. And they're like, Yeah, that sounds good. But I don't even know how I would start to do that. Or what do you mean ready for change? Maybe I'm not ready. I don't know that sounds scary. What are some of the ways is there even like a journal prompt or a meditation that you've done that helps them come back to dreaming again and living?

Yeah, that's a really good question. The one thing that I started doing is I would sit for five minutes, and I would visualize the life that I wanted, but I pretended I was already living it, I found something that really excited me, it really lit me up. And if you're in that place where you're so depleted, and things are so heavy, you literally have nothing left in your tank, you're stressed to the max, you don't know where the next thing is coming from, you just have a million things on your plate, I get that I've been there. And you can't visualize like what you want for your future for five minutes and just sit in that picture. I started thinking about a time in my childhood that I had so much fun. Like, I remember specific incidents where it was so fun to just be carefree and be a kid. And literally, that emotion and the feelings that come with those memories and the things that we're thinking about as a kid. Those are the same feelings that put us in the vibration of opening up and allowing things to come in. And when we feel good about those things, it's easier to feel good about other things.

You remind me to that sometimes we have to take things away. I'm just thinking how hard it can be to be in that space. If you have the TV going and the kids are running around the living room and it's loud and your phone's going off all the time. What are some of the ways other than sitting outside you're saying you don't look at your email in the beginning of the day, but maybe it's the middle of the day and there are things going on around you and you're needed for who knows what, how can you turn some things off around you maybe literally like turning the TV off, but in being more present in life and just finding some of that silence as a family and connecting. Is there anything that works well for you guys? Yeah, you

know right now that summer for So everybody's home. One thing that we do is we don't watch TV during the day. And that's just something that we do in our house just because it is nice outside, and we try to be outside, but it can be rambunctious, the neighbors are coming over and that sort of thing. And I'm still trying to work too. So I do need some time where the kids are bugging me and that sort of thing. But I love hearing the joy in their laughter. So part of that is something that I can just be okay with, but just make it by soul feel good to hear them laugh, because we don't take enough time to do that, honestly. And just having a good old belly laugh. There's just some Yeah, to that. And so part of that to answer your question is, if I need a moment, it's the middle of the day and say, my husband's not home, because he's still at work. And I need, like, just that moment. One thing I found is, my daughter's a little bit older. So this works for me, but I don't get interrupted when I'm in the bathroom. So if I get if you have little kids, that might not be the case. But I might not need to actually use the restroom. But I'll just go in there and sit for five minutes, because I know, nobody's gonna bother me if they know I'm in the restroom. So I might just go in there for five minutes and just sit on like edge of the tub, or sit actually in the tub. But like something, I could just lay my head back for a second. And I'll just sit quietly for five minutes. And that's something that works for me if I can't actually leave the house. But I do also set something in my phone every day, where I'm actually eating lunch with my daughter, like, I don't check email, I don't answer calls, I literally don't do anything during whatever that timeframe is that I've set for myself that day, where I just get to be present with her. And that to me is almost like having some time to be quiet, because I'm just getting to be. Yeah, I love that.

And it brings me back to what we were talking about before we click to record and we're talking about how myself included, before I started my business, I got really tripped up on what was I going to share online about my day to day and my family and how was I going to connect with my community, but also keep things private. And my kids are so little so they don't have a say in what I'm posting at this point in my decision. And when you're talking about the way you're spending your day and how you stay present in a time, it reminds me of just how difficult it can be to figure out how to balance this business side of you. You're on TV, social media platforms connecting with all these women, but you also have these other people that are just your family. And one of the things you said is that you don't share your daughter's diagnosis, which I think is so powerful, I'd love for you to talk a little bit about that decision, and how you stand behind it. And how you would empower other parents, whether it's a diagnosis or just like where their kids go to school or their names or whatever it is to help them understand that they get to be in charge. And you can still connect with this community. You've built this amazing community of moms connecting with you. And they don't need to know that information. How do you explain that to someone else that's tripped up over that I

think a lot of mom, and even dads too. And I feel like moms are probably more on social media, because we'd like to be expressive, and we want people to know what's going on in our lives. But at the end of the day, it really is about what we're comfortable with. It's really none of anyone else's business, what's happening in our lives, I still consider myself an open book. But now I have different boundaries. But in college, I could care less what people knew about me. And I don't think social media was as big of a thing as it is now. But if someone called me I didn't care what they asked me or I would tell them what was happening. And that was just my personality and who I was. But once I had my daughter, initially it was the same. We use social media just to keep our friends and family in the loop of what was happening in our lives. And I didn't share all the time. But when I posted it was because it was something I wanted them to know none of our family lives close to us. And it's not always easy when you have an infant to take a phone call all the time for everyone who wants to know what's happening. And so I just kind of viewed the social media as a way for me to keep everyone in the loop as to certain milestones or things that were happening in our life. And my daughter was born with special needs. So people wanted to know what was going on. And we got calls and messages all the time. So I just felt like for me, that was an easy way to send out some information without me having to talk to everyone because it wasn't just like, she wasn't sleeping. We literally had medical things that we did constantly throughout the day. So I really didn't have the time. What happened though, for me is someone in the family. And again, this partially with AMI, because social media was newer, it wasn't completely new, but it is newer. And I didn't really have a full understanding of how all of that worked and algorithms and all that stuff that we understand now. Yeah, but they shared certain posts and certain pictures and things that really I felt there's like a betrayal because when I saw what they were posting, it was really for the benefit of themselves. They were using our situation and what we were going through to get sympathy and empathy and attention for themselves and write them in there. I shut it all down. I stopped it. Yeah, there was a new boundary drawn for me, because I felt like that was a scenario where we were being used for their benefit. And that does not fly with me. So I completely shut that down. And I stopped posting anything and everything about my family entirely. Even myself, there wasn't really anything about me personally, unless it was involving my business. And I happened to be like in the picture, because it was something to do with whatever business I had at the time. And that's really what I kept it to was more professional, there was really nothing personal about it. Yeah, but I'm just feeling that nudge to tell my story. When I realized part of that, when I was going through the throat thing as well, and me actually speaking my truth and being myself and being who I'm meant to be, I realized, what I really wanted to do was help the women that might be in similar shoes as me that are so career focused, but they're trying to balance not only their career, and their family, but maybe they also have special needs kids. And that's a lot to juggle, especially if they actually have medical needs. So I realized when I wanted to shift to coaching that the only way for them to know that they could count on me or that there was someone in their shoes was for me to share part of what I have gone through and what I've been through. And so I did start sharing some of my experiences, because I felt that was my nudge. And I felt that's what I was being called to do was because there were women who were suffering in a way that they didn't know how to get out of it, that I had gotten out of it, I had worked my way through it that needed to know that process and understand what step to take next that worked for them. And the more that I shared my experiences, I realized that was a way for them to know that they weren't alone. Yeah. Which was also the premise of me doing the show is because I think a lot of us suffer in silence, so to speak. And logically, of course, we know that other people experienced the same things. But at the end of the day, you don't know who to reach out to and who to talk to. And of course, we have spouses and we have family. But I didn't remember like one of the annoying things would happen to me is like when my daughter would go through a major surgery. And people say, Oh, I know what you're going through. It was like no one you really dealt with, I appreciate that. You're trying to have empathy for the situation. But I was like, that really irritated me. So I needed to work around that when people would say, I know what you're going through. And it's no, unless you want a day in our shoes really don't know what we're going through. And that wasn't to be like me. And I never said that. But there's a lot that goes along with whatever it is you're experiencing on a daily life. So you can't always turn to your neighbor just events, because they want to try to help but sometimes you don't need the help. You just need someone to listen,

we hear that a lot on this show. And it's so hard because being on the other side, I'm I am myself, I'm so guilty of this because we want to solve problems, right, especially as vicious women and moms and even as coaches. We want to solve problems. But sometimes you can't. And sometimes you're not meant to. And that is so hard. But knowing that you have someone that maybe can just listen is super, super powerful. So if someone doesn't feel like they have that person to listen to them, and it sounds like you didn't either, how do you start finding those people?

For me, I found some groups, I wasn't really in a place where I wanted to share still at that point. But for me, I just hired a coach that could help me work through whatever that was because I'm more of that one on one person. Like, I've bought courses and books and all that kind of stuff. And they're helpful, but only to a certain extent, in my opinion. Like, yeah, I had a question. There was no one to ask, right? I was like, okay, I can do all the worksheets, and I can work through all this stuff. But then what do I do, right? If I'm still feeling stuck, or I don't know, the next step, or I can't quite get to the depth of whatever I feel my problem is or my issue is or my obstacle, like, there was no one to reference. And so for me, coaches have always been the answer just because there was someone I can actually call. And the one thing I appreciated about a coach is they were really third party. They were neutral to anything right. There was a couple things there. For me, it was an outside perspective, but it also was someone to listen. Yeah.

What are some ways, especially with special needs, but in general, as a mom, that you really empower your daughter that you help her build her confidence and her strength and her mindset? Are there certain things that you've really attempted to instill in certain ways?

Yeah, I love that question. But one of the things is I don't ever publicly talk about her diagnosis. And that's not necessarily to protect her her by an immune she'd probably be okay with it. But really, it's not my story to tell what I've been through and what I've experienced from the mom perspective is my story to tell. But her diagnosis and what she goes through and what she experiences is her story. So I don't ever disclose that or talk about that publicly because I feel that that's her story. And that really empowers her because now she can share it if she wants to, she can talk about it when she's ready. And one of the other things that I do as far as mindset goes, honestly, kids are sponges. And they witness what we do, right? They pick up the things that we practice, and I'm I read frequently, I listen to podcasts and things that help with my mindset, she does that as well, we play a game that will pick three things for that day that we want to see. And some people might call this manifesting, but we just we do it for fun, but it also gets her in that mindset of something to do with mom's. So we'll pick three things could be totally random. And we'll see how quick it takes us to see those three things. And so that's a fun thing that we do together. But part of that mindset is realizing that what we think about we can bring about teaching her that her only limitation is her. Yes, she can do whatever it is that she sets out to do. It's just a matter of her wanting to do it and figuring out a way. Yeah.

What are some ways that you help her build good relationships, community, good friends, friends, are so hard as kids and adults. But I think until you learn how to build good friendships, and part of that is knowing yourself, right? And all of the work that you're just saying. But sometimes it's really hard to find good people, what are some ways that you help encourage that?

For her, it's probably I don't want to say it's been harder, because we never say that something's hard, because as soon as you think it's hard that it is harder, but one of the things because she's in a wheelchair that does automatically put up a barrier for some kids, especially in elementary school, because as parents and myself included, because before I was educated, like I probably wouldn't have taught her how to approach another student in a wheelchair that had a walker had a different disability. But just because I didn't understand or know how to teach her how to approach that. So honestly, I think part of it comes back to us as parents is teaching our kids, that child with a disability is just like any other child, they just might do things differently. So like, in my daughter's case, she's completely high functioning, she's just in a wheelchair. So she just gets around differently. So that's one of the things when she was young is that we taught her to say that and we taught her to take initiative to make contact with other kids, because kids, unfortunately, they don't know how to approach her when they see the wheelchair. They don't know how to interact with her. So we really had to teach her to reach out to the other kids first and be that person that takes the initiative to go introduce herself. And then they can see oh, she's another kid just like me. And then she would say that if they would ask because kids are curious, right? They would ask why do you have that? And she would just say your whatever her answer was, when she might tell them her diagnosis, she might not. Or she might just say this is how I get around. This is how I walk. And so we just taught her that whatever she was comfortable saying, and for her initially when she was younger, that was easiest. This is just how I get round. And this is how I walk. But we've really had to instill in her to be that person to take initiative. And she's such a great advocate for herself. Now she speaks up for herself. And that has been something that we have worked on even through middle school and now up into high school, like we've had them work with her to be like that advocate and learn to speak up. Because a lot of times as kids, we just go with what the authority is, and we should in some cases, but in her case, because she has other medical needs, she needs to be the one to step up and speak up because she knows what her needs are regards to that.

Yeah. For parents of children that don't have special needs. What are some things that you wish they taught their kids to have more kindness or understanding? What are some things especially just for all ages?

I think that was really the biggest thing is just let them know that it's okay to go talk to that students or that child. And if you're curious as to why they're in the wheelchair, I think sometimes too, when parents have a child that goes and asks, they're almost like embarrassed. And they're almost like, I'm so sorry. And it's like, well, no, that's okay, that we want to have a friendship there or some kind of connection if it makes sense. And I think the biggest thing for parents is just let their kids be curious if they want to go say hi to that students, or that child that's in the wheelchair or has a walker, let them go say hi. Or maybe encourage them to go say hi, because some kids just aren't going to take the initiative. They're not that outgoing and they might be too uncomfortable to go that. I think if parents can just let their kiddos know that, hey, those other kids that have a disability, they want friends, they want to be friends and they're really great friends. Yeah, a lot of them, like give wholeheartedly. And so when they're friends, they're loyal friends. And I think if there's just an opportunity for parents to be able to say, all students, our students just like you, they just might get around differently or they might just learn differently. But that doesn't mean that they're any less or any different or are too good friend to you. Yeah, so good. Now

let's talk a little bit more about how you support the other women because you are doing such great things in the world. I want anyone that's listening, that's Oh, my gosh, I need Laura in my life, to understand where they can find you, and how you truly work with people. Like you said, You do one on one, you have other programs, and for anyone to watch the moms who rock TV show, but how can you really support someone that's listening? And they're like, gosh, I need some support like that in my life.

Yeah, that's perfect. Thank you. They obviously can watch the show that is on every major streaming platforms. And it's airing in like almost 100 countries now. So it doesn't matter where you're hearing this from, you can see the TV show. But also, if they go to my website, it's more of cipher coaching.com, they can book a consultation with me, I'm happy to do that just to see if it makes sense to work together. But I also have some digital courses on there covering a bunch of different topics that either can help you personally get through the depleted feeling worthy again, that kind of thing, all the way to I'm actually in the process of recording one that helps parents get through that process of the unexpected surgery and emergency surgery and the plan surgery, because that can be really overwhelming for parents. So that'll be another course that'll be up there soon, or they can work with me one on one. And I'm in the process of putting together like a group session as well, too, that's just not available

yet. Amazing. And what is something that you're currently working on that you have a goal of personally, professionally, as a family, any of that something that you're excited about,

I'm really working towards having more seasons of my show, and having more guests on, because that really is what lights me up and excites me. And I really do love working with moms one on one, as well. But I think my biggest goal is to for sure have another season of the show. We're coming up on the end of the first one here in September. Hopefully that'll be renewed for a second season coming into fall. And one of the things that actually is on my vision board is possibly doing a book. So that's a goal that I have out there. So we'll see how that comes to fruition.

Amazing in for the moms listening that are just so lit up by this conversation. I love immediate action. So if they were to stop this episode and go take one immediate action, what would you recommend that they do?

Literally just go take five minutes by yourself and be quiet. Turn off your phone, just sit and if you want to listen to a song that either gets you excited to remind you of something that was joyful in your life, or that just gives you peace. do that just for five minutes. Because the majority of the moms that I work with, that's their biggest thing right now is that they're just depleted and empty and worn out.

Laura, thank you so much. This was such a good conversation. I cannot wait to connect with you more moms, especially if you have special needs children. But in general, if you're just looking for support, definitely check out the show notes linked here. Everything for Laura so you can connect with her. Thanks for being here, Laura.

Thank you so much for having me.

Sometimes the smallest acts of love is all a mom needs to feel reinvigorated. If you can relate to that I'd feel so supported by your five star rating and written review. Take a moment and let me know what you thought about this episode