Paul Korber joins Nkechi to share his transformative journey through mental health challenges and the impactful lessons he's learned along the way. After reaching a profound turning point in 2022, Paul candidly discusses the importance of recognizing when to seek help and the role that therapy played in his recovery. He emphasizes the significance of building a supportive network and how vulnerability can open doors to deeper connections with others. As they explore the theme of men's health, Paul highlights the necessity of self-care and the power of leading from a heart-centered perspective. This conversation not only sheds light on personal resilience but also encourages listeners to embrace their journeys and support one another in the pursuit of wellness.

Takeaways:

• Empowerment thrives when individuals embrace vulnerability and reach out for help during challenging times.
• The journey of mental health improvement is unique for everyone, and self-care is essential.
• Networking is beneficial not only for professional growth, but also for personal well-being and support.
• Recognizing one's own struggles is the first step towards healing and transformation.
• Prioritizing self-care and personal happiness leads to better leadership and team dynamics.
• Therapy is not just for crisis moments; it can greatly aid in preventative mental health care.

If this episode resonates with you, then remember... SUBSCRIBE • 5-Star Rate • COMMENT • SHARE this Podcast!! 💚❤️🙌🏾🙏🏾

Find Paul Online:

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/paulkorber/

Find us online: https://linktr.ee/nkechinwaforrobinson

Great day, amazing human.

Welcome to the Empowered in My Skin podcast where our mission is to help 1 billion people in this world think in more empowering ways.

Empowered humans empower humans.

So you are in the right spot to become a lead domino for empowerment today.

My name is Ingke Chi.

I'm not only your host, but I am a vibrant, optimist, obsessed success to bring you empowering content with each episode, we will be bringing you content alternating between longer episodes with featured guests and shorter episodes called Empowering Bites where I'll be joined by my co host, Gabby Mamone.

So if you're ready, let the show begin.

Yes.

Great day, amazing humans and hi youtubers.

And welcome to the next episode of Empowered My skin.

And as you know, because this is airing on a Monday, this is actually the last episode of our men's series.

And so this is our third year running.

And so excited that I'm wrapping up with actually someone who I consider a mentor.

Definitely someone who's helped me out a lot in my career life and personal life too.

So really, really excited to introduce you to our next guest and our final guest in our Men's health series.

He is a seasoned executive who has transformed his personal and professional life through resilience and a deep commitment to wellness.

I'm really, really excited to dive into that and really confronting mental health in a very unique and inspiring way.

I'm gonna say his journey is marked by physical and emotional renewal and it's included rebuilding his health through running.

I think you picked that up in Italy or if I read that quickly like I had to.

Anyway, I'll tell the peoples in a minute how this came to be.

And fitness.

Yes.

And reigniting your passion for travel and dedicating yourself to mindfulness and heart centered leadership.

But what I love is that it seems like from you know, maybe potentially victim to Victor, you've now a certified heart math practitioner and wellness advocate and you have this drive to really help teams and others thrive.

And so you've emerged, you're emerging now your executive experience with this life journey and insights from your personal transformation and really now using it to serve and help others in the world.

And I love that about you and I think that that's really important.

And in large part the series that we're doing is about really double clicking on men's health.

Sometimes it is the, it is the forgotten health amongst humans.

Right.

Women are pretty good at it.

Men tend to shy away from it.

But I'm hoping that this conversation that I'm going to have with you is going to really continue to help really amplify that journey, that need for men.

And so, without further ado, all of my listeners, all of my YouTubers, put your ears, your hands, everything you've got together, and give my next guest an amazing, gigantic.

You know how to do it.

Empowered my skin.

Welcome to Paul Korber.

Well, this is awesome.

Thanks, Inkachi.

It's great to be with you.

And I can hear all the applause.

Yeah, right.

I just empower the humans to clap and pause and everything like that.

I love it.

I thank you for saying yes and, and so quickly.

And, you know, I always say your network is your net worth.

Yeah.

And one thing I've learned, and I often share in sort of my.

The practices that I share as part of my thought leadership that, you know, networking is never about today.

You network today for time in the future.

And so to everyone that, like the B roll of all of this is I had a guest who canceled that I was scheduled to interview today, and their episode is supposed to air.

And I have.

I need time to, like, prepare it.

And rather than panic, I was like, wait, I have a really great network, you know, and who do I, who can I, in this moment of need, call on that?

I believe one is going to answer my call on the Saturday afternoon.

And B, because they love me.

Say yes, let's do this, girlfriend.

And it was Paul.

And exactly that happened.

I love it.

I saw.

Thank you so much.

And this is actually a year coming because you had shared very intimately with me that you had gone through, that you had gone through a journey with your mental health, and you were writing a book at the time.

And I always knew that I wanted to pick your brain and really understand what that is.

And so here we are.

Here we are.

This is great.

The first question I'm going to ask you is just the same question I ask all of my guests is what is the most empowering thought that you've had for.

Of for today so far?

Well, you know what, you just, you just hit upon the network as being your net worth.

You know, I think that.

And we'll cover this in the conversation, but, you know, often we're afraid to reach out to people, and especially we'll get into some of the mental health challenges and stuff that people go through.

But we, we feel like we're alone.

Yet when we do reach out, there's not anybody that said no that they weren't willing to help, to talk, to listen.

Right.

And so that's, you know, that's a good starting point for, for this conversation, for sure.

I love it and I love.

And you're an example of that.

So, so let's get right into it.

I had the pleasure of leafing through.

I have to read it back to front for sure.

But really glean some insights from your book in terms of being prepared to have this conversation with you.

So can you.

I thought as a first question, the backstory always helps.

Right.

But I've always seen you as this like top executive doing your thing, sought after.

And so I can't lie, like I.

When you told me that, I was like, I was really surprised.

And sometimes I think we think the strongest amongst us can endure everything.

And so can you maybe give people some backstories to who Paul is and you know, sort of what you've achieved in your life?

So they really kind of understand this.

Sure.

And it's interesting.

I think from my perspective, the story actually is telling when you get into things and look backwards and you kind of say, you know, how did I get to this point?

But yeah, I think where you and I met was working together at IBM and I got brought in to firefight some pretty severe infrastructure problems and became kind of known for that.

Right.

Hey, there's a problem, there's a fire over here.

Let's get Paul to come help us fix this.

And that's how you earn your stripes and go forward.

So I had a couple of companies before IBM then worked, you know, worked for about 10 years, I think, well told with IBM as well, and then decided to move along.

Ended up over at Bell Canada and you know, progressively more senior roles, got into product, professional services, leading large programs.

Have a hair, a hair on the fire story of, you know, I could, I could.

We won't digress into it today but you know, dealing with the federal government and a massive project that was out of control.

So again, being put into the fire to kind of go put it out.

Right.

And so, yeah, I think that that's, you know, without getting into the specifics of, you know, each job, you know, that's been kind of my journey.

And you know, we're sitting here 35 years into a career that's, that's been, I've been blessed to have and you know, it's done very well for, for me and my family in the process.

So, you know, yeah, very high performer.

Have achieved great heights, you know, probably have experiences that, you know, have actually Helped you probably help others and.

Right.

Did you realize that you need help and how did you take that first step to seek it?

Because I think realizing is the first thing.

Yeah, it was, it was not obvious.

You know, it took time to figure out that, you know, there was more going on than just the normal day stress.

And we all go through it.

We go through ups and we go through downs.

And I'm sure, you know, you and I've been on similar courses.

Our list of your listeners, your viewers have been to taken different things around leadership, around personal resilience, those kinds of things.

But when you get into kind of the, you start getting into a darker place sometimes that's not that often obvious.

And I, I remember well what led me to kind of realize that I needed to do a little bit more than just kind of sucking it up and getting on with it was I would sit at my desk and cry before calls and I'm like, this is not cool.

Like this is not who I am.

Right.

And you know, we, when you, you know, I was diagnosed, just a little bit of a fast forward, diagnosed with some depression issues.

And so when I was looking back at, you know, kind of you sit down with a counselor and you start going through kind of, you know, dissecting what's really driving things.

And fortunately mine wasn't, I wasn't at a place of wanting to do self harm.

You know, it's important to talk about these kinds of things.

Right.

Because people have different degrees of, of, of, you know, depression and other, other conditions.

But you know, when we, when, when I was looking at things that was, nobody knew at work that I was having a problem.

You know, my closest friends did, my certainly my, my wife did, my partner did.

But you know, we show what we want to show.

My work performance was, I'm going to say this, my work performance sucked in my own mind, but in everybody else's mind is like Paul's just doing his thing.

Right.

And so that, that really, that one day where I'm, well, it was a couple of days leading into it, but crying before a call is like, you know, this.

I got to do something about this.

Right.

And fortunately, working for a company that we have, the employee assistance program, I reached out and then, you know, really started the, the help process for so.

And for someone like you, how did that, like, how did that experience feel?

Like, did you, was it Was it mirrored with shame or, you know, like, did you have any of that?

Yeah, I, I think so.

And actually, I mean, you know, I'm two years away, you know, two years removed from that.

I think I'm in a better place, but I still feel it, you know, I still feel that, you know, people talk about imposter syndrome and those kinds of things.

It's a dark version of imposter syndrome.

Right.

It's like, I don't belong here.

And yeah, a lot of different thinking.

A lot of different thinking.

But shame, shame was definitely one of them.

You know, the, the, the extension of that is that you feel like you're letting everybody down and you really need to focus on, you know, you fixing your own self rather than worrying about everybody else.

But that's how you hide it, right?

You, you kind of say, you know, a lot of, A lot of.

In my career as well as, you know, is, is team performance, looking after the people that, that worked with me and for me, very important to me.

And, you know, I always had high performing teams and, and people that cared about each other and did good work.

So I also felt guilty that I was letting them down.

Right.

As I thought about, I had no choice but to push away, but, you know, felt very guilty about that.

But isn't it funny, like, I always, like, as I listen to you, I always, I also would say that chances are you have a lot in the bank account, Right.

Of not letting people down in those moments.

You'd be surprised how many people want to help.

Absolutely.

Like.

Yeah, right.

So you had some credit.

Yeah, yeah, there's definitely, definitely that.

Yeah.

But it's interesting.

I had, I had a friend of mine, one of the, one of my, one of my colleagues, he lives out in St.

John's Newfoundland, and he and his wife had come in the summer, summer of 22 too.

They were in having a family vacation.

So we got together and had dinner and, you know, we had a really nice visit.

But I was not myself.

I was not who he was used to dealing with.

He saw it, right?

And then fast forward a year, another year, we went out to St.

John's to see them.

And he's like, he could tell as soon as I got out of the car, he says, paul's back.

Okay.

Okay.

So you never talked about it in that year?

No, no, no.

So it's like, you know, people, yeah, people, people know.

They, they know.

And you know, I think what was really bizarre too is, is, you know, the organization I was part of, we did a Lot of mental health training for the leadership team.

And even when I was in the course and I wasn't at this point suffering from depression, but, you know, you're going through the course and you're saying, so, but what does it look like?

Yes.

And they can't really answer you.

No.

Really got an answer.

And now through it, it's like, okay, you can't tell because I'll show you.

Yeah.

I think there's a spectrum.

Right.

I think, like, you were alluding it to differently.

I think everyone's journey is personal.

And it's interesting because I've had a number of conversations, especially with this one.

It was incredible.

He's written the book called Stigma Zero, and he's had both where he's had a brain injury, physical brain injury, and he's had mental health.

And he talked about, like, the.

The stark difference between how he dealt with it for one and two, how people dealt with him both.

Right.

In one case he got a lot of empathy and compassion, and another case he got fear and misunderstanding.

Right.

And so, yeah, just.

Yeah, it's just as well.

So I have.

There's two things I want to ask you that are.

So the first one, I want to.

Before I want you to double click on therapy, because I think I'm.

I'm big on therapy.

I think you.

I mean, if you start to think about, like, performance athletes, elite athletes and all this.

Any other, like, these athletes, like, shave like, a millisecond off of their time, which is the difference between gold and silver.

Right.

At the end of the day, they're like, not only they're getting, like, the physical, like, coaching, but they're also getting the mental coaching.

They're getting, like, therapy.

Like, because all of that is required in order to perform, it's no really different, in my opinion, in.

In, like, even career life as a professional.

Right.

Like in relationships.

Right.

So I always say therapy before you need it can actually be very beneficial to its prevention almost.

You know, I do want to double click on that, all of that to say.

Yeah, I couldn't agree more.

And at the time, probably didn't recognize it.

And even, you know, think about your organizations with mentors, mentorships, and those kinds of things.

I never really embraced that kind of stuff.

I was a mentor, but I never was a mentee and so missed out probably in some of that guidance and career counseling and other things.

Right.

But yeah, I think the, you know, the looking back on, like, ultimately, in order for me to get from where I was in my Dark, alone place to being back and functioning and, you know, back out trying to build a business and get back out onto, you know, get back out into the, into the real world again.

You know, I ultimately had to build a team around me, and initially it was the counselor from eap.

You know, I was fortunate enough to have enough sessions within that, and I nailed the person that she was a perfect match for me.

That's what I was going to ask you.

How do you know, like, can you also talk to.

Yeah, I'm sure if she didn't work out, I could ask for a different counselor.

But in the scenario that I got, I got really, really.

Her name was Marcy.

She's now since retired, so I've lost track of her.

I don't know where.

Have you read your ebook yet?

I don't think so.

But she was a runner and we got into having just very simple conversations.

And, you know, like I mentioned earlier, like, we've been through, we've all been through certain levels of training and resiliency and, you know, we've got these techniques.

And I said openly to her, I said, you know, Marcy, I know exactly what I need to do, but I can't get off the couch to do it.

And so she figured out the connection that she's a runner and she knew I wanted to, you know, I was missing running as an outlet.

And she said, how about this?

Just tomorrow morning, put on your running shoes.

That's it.

That's it.

And she said, in the next day, put on your running shoes and if you feel completely compelled, open the door.

Right.

So she started that process and it was great.

Very, very foundational for me to kind of come, you know, clear the cobwebs and get out and be ready before.

You go further, actually ask you.

So the next day you woke up, you did the work.

I did the work.

Put on your running shoes.

Did you do anything beyond that?

I would say I, you know, initially, no.

It took me probably a week of putting my shoes on to then go for a short walk and, and I couldn't go to the corner.

And then it just became longer and longer and longer and then became sort of that outside, fresh air, doing the things, letting your brain process getting out of the house and, you know, getting off the couch because it's just way, way too comfortable getting out of bed.

Right.

And I like the reason I'm double clicking because I appreciate, I appreciate you for allowing me to ask you because it's not easy.

I mean, I'm not trying to get you.

But I just like, it's almost to help really break the stigma here because you put on your running shoes.

So your shoes are on.

You could go running.

But there's something that's physically preventing you from doing that.

Like, if you can, if you can remember that first time, like what's in your head telling Paul that you don't deserve to go.

Right.

Like, what is what?

Like, do you remember what that felt like?

Yeah, that's a really good question.

I think, I think that the word I would probably use is fear.

You're.

You've built a cocoon of safety that to.

You need to break out of the cocoon, if you will, to kind of get back out and because, you know, you, you know, it's.

Everybody's situation will be different.

But I withdrew from everybody, even my family.

Like, I, I was just a lump on the couch watching tv and, and just kind of, you know, very disengaged.

And you, you've known me a long time.

I'm not a dis.

Right.

Well, that's what I say.

When you told me, I was like, wow.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And so, yeah, I would say in, in.

It's probably the, the easiest I could get my emotion wheel out and I'll probably.

I could probably come up with a better word, but I would say probably very fearful, very fearful, very self conscious, you know?

Yeah.

Afraid's the probably the.

And before that time, were you.

How were you with talking about feelings?

Like, really, like, were you good at that?

Were you good at really like that self awareness piece, like really understanding who you were?

I'm gonna say yes and no.

You know, I think that you're talking about men's health.

I mean, it's very stereotypical that it's suck it up, you know, like, just get on with it.

What's your problem?

You know, it's.

It's a guy thing.

You know, our fathers have taught us a certain way, be tough.

Right.

Crying's not allowed.

Right.

So I think that, you know, my mom did a good job of giving me an emotional base that my dad didn't, but didn't always embrace that side of it.

Right.

So, you know, so that's why I say yes and no.

And you know, often, you know, it's probably just not just the men that you're talking to and the women in the audience as well is like, we do stuff at work, we suck at up, we put a face on and we come home and unload our emotions at home.

Right.

Because you, you let your Hair down, you let your guard down and it's like, okay.

And no different than our kids coming home from school and you know, they're, they're on their best behavior at school and then they come and they freak out because there's, you know, whatever.

Right.

So, you know, so yeah, I think that that's where I would say the yes and no.

Right.

Especially when you put so much energy into making sure your teams are in, in good places that there's wellness balance, you know, obviously the corporate performance that's expected from us.

But yeah.

So I think that, you know, I've certainly become significantly more aware of how I feel, you know, developing and trying to find new techniques to, you know, to help myself, help me manage those day to day create a routine around it so that it's not, oh my goodness, I'm now in a dark place and I have to pull myself out.

It's the managing the self care going forward.

Right.

And now like I want to now sort of start to transition into the lesson and who you're now becoming, how that's improved your leadership.

But before I do, there's something that you hadn't mentioned before that like people at work didn't really know.

You talked about your friend in like, you know, a year later.

So how much of your, when you were in your journey did you dare to share with others?

And sometimes I feel like when you think you're alone, you're alone until you start to share and then somebody says, oh my gosh, me too.

Yeah.

Did you have that experience?

Not initially.

I would say it probably, you know, the people that were closest to us, I didn't go go looking for other people to share with.

I mean I think it was the closer inner circle family, close friends, you know, to what any depending on the recipient of that information dictates how much you share.

Right.

I think that, you know, it goes to, it's just the human relationship dynamic is, you know, in some cases you're willing to share more than others.

Some places you feel vulnerability is okay and other places you don't.

So that's the degree to which.

Okay.

You know, and you know, in I tell this in my story in September of 22 when we went to Italy and, and I don't know that I even my brother in law and sister in law were with us and I don't even know if they knew the extent of what, what I was going through other than I was struggling from work and, and at that time have chosen not to go back.

Right.

And so, you know, unless sometimes, unless people ask, and this is another thing that's really, I think, important for people to, to, to realize that it's.

It's not an imposition to ask how you're doing.

And it's not an imposition to go one step deeper.

So, hey, how you doing?

If you know me, and you would say, hey, Paul, how are you doing?

You could tell if I'm doing well.

It's the next question that I think is the most helpful.

Can I help in any way or I don't know what the right answer.

Everybody's going to receive that question differently or perceive that question differently, but showing that you're an ally, showing that you're.

You're genuinely there for support.

You know, I mentioned it earlier.

I wasn't in a.

In a harm place, which is I'm thankful for, but other people are.

And, and that simple question could pull them back from the brink of let me go get some help as opposed to, you know, I want to end my life.

Right.

And.

Yeah, I don't know if it's the best question on the planet.

It's just.

No, no, I'm just saying it's in KG cheese question I actually asked ask.

And I've learned this through just experiences of friends going through grief, but I've learned to ask and people will see it.

It's actually the first question I ask in my greetings is how awesome are you doing today?

Because the how are you doing?

Is a very common question.

Everybody asks it.

Right.

And you're programmed to answer it.

To answer it.

I'm fine.

Right?

Yeah.

But if you change up the question, you're probably going to get and more of a question around being very intentional about this moment.

How are you doing in this moment?

How am I meeting you right now, today?

Because sometimes I think it's important because that could also shape the next thing that happens in that conversation.

You might have just been going right into work and that person is not even in a position or mental capacity to be able to, you know, sort of take on whatever it is that you.

You want to do anyway.

So I try to.

I try to ask a question that breaks the cycle of what typically people would ask.

Right.

Yeah.

I think I.

What I.

I love when you call me because when we talk.

Because you asked me that.

Well, not necessarily like variations of that.

And what it does is if.

Wait a second.

She's not asking me the normal question.

Right.

I have to think about this.

Wait a second.

Does she really want to know?

Right but it' good because it jogs you out of that pattern.

That pattern that we're all programmed into.

Yeah, right.

Yeah.

So let's now talk about.

And I don't know where you are in your journey, so I don't want to.

But it sounds like you've written a book.

So you have said that I've gone through something.

And I always like to say.

I'm not saying you were in a mess, but I call.

It's like the message from the mess.

Right.

Like.

Right.

And so when first, before you get into, like how you're helping others, how has your leadership been further influenced by this experience?

Like, how do you feel you're showing up to life now?

Yeah, I think that I am.

I am pushing the envelope a little bit differently than I did.

And what I mean by that is, you know, like, I haven't been back into a corporate setting.

Actually, that's not true.

I was in a corporate setting.

I ran.

I did a contract last year.

And so a lot of the things that I've been doing is more one on one.

But I, you know, from that perspective, I think that my leadership, my personal leadership and how I lead myself has changed in that I've recognized that life is too short that to be.

And one of the things that I've really, really worked on in the last couple of years is I've.

I've figured out that I'm a people pleaser.

And that's part of the root of how I got myself into the, the scenario that, that I was in.

And I've been working a lot on how to be happy with me.

And so that by doing that, then I have a better objective view of what's going on around me.

Is it, is it satisfying, Paul, first versus, you know, you get into these work scenarios and it's like it's all.

You're on the treadmill and, you know, getting off.

Getting off the treadmill.

Right.

So I think that that's probably the biggest shift other than getting kind of, you know, back into being Paul.

I think that the biggest progression has been around recognizing that.

And that's.

That doesn't mean I get I'm a ding.

Right.

But it just means that I'm not.

It's just not.

I evaluate everything.

Now is it for me, you're putting.

Your oxygen mask first?

Yeah, yeah, absolutely.

Absolutely.

And, you know, I think in the, in preparation for this, I let you, you know, mention that, you know, the journey has evolved substantially from the book because my son and I, we, you know, earlier this year, went to Africa to climb mount.

Yeah, we went to climb Mount Kilimanjaro.

Oh, you did?

When was that?

It was in February.

It was freaking incredible experience.

It was freaking awesome.

And where did that come from?

It came from me trying to rebuild, and I was looking at successful people, and I kept finding these documentaries about people doing crazy things, and I'm like, what reasonable crazy thing could I do?

Yeah, climb a mountain, which is great.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And so, you know, you.

When you do those kinds of things and you really push the boundaries, you know, the.

What was interesting?

You talked about the.

They asked about the.

My.

My.

My site, my therapist, in terms of getting ready for Kilimanjaro.

I built a.

I had a.

I had an executive coach on the business side, and I had, you know, a trainer as well, to prep.

And then unfortunately had an injury, so I ended up with a physiotherapist.

So I had this whole team of people getting me ready.

And, you know, it's.

It's kind of a.

Sharing.

This is actually, I think, really important for people is about two weeks before we left, I.

My.

My injury was.

Wasn't recovered, but it was.

I was managing it, and I was losing it because I'm like, oh, my God, am I going to get up this mountain?

I was stressing out.

I was having a complete meltdown.

I called my coach, and he's like, oh, settle down.

Yeah.

And he goes, what do you mean, settle down?

Like, it's kind of like your.

Your question of how you're doing.

Right.

He's like, dude, what's your problem?

And.

And.

And then he said, his name's Craig.

And he said, look, he says, you've done absolutely everything you can to prepare for this trip.

Yeah.

He says, so I.

What I want you to do between the now and the time you get on the plane.

He said, go back to the reasons why you're doing this.

And.

And it was like, wow, okay.

Well, that's kind of weird advice, but okay, Craig, I'll go do that.

And you know what?

It.

It was really important that I had done that because it did two things.

It allowed my son and I to have a conversation.

It's contextualized.

But, hey, what if we're on the mountain and something happens?

When do one of us can.

If I get hurt, you come with me or do you keep going?

Right.

So we had to.

We had that.

But that allowed that conversation to happen.

And then the.

Our summit night was a crazy, crazy night.

Weather was terrible, and we had to make a decision whether we were going to continue to the summit or whether we were going to go back down.

And to give some context, it was 35 mile an hour winds with 85 mile an hour, Gustav.

And our.

And our camp was flattened.

Right.

So, you know, we ultimately made the decision not to go.

And, you know, my.

My son, everybody, like, because you're not climbing by yourself.

There's a group.

No, we had a team.

There was a team of 50 people supporting 14 guests.

Right.

And all 14 of us said, no, we're not doing this.

This is.

This is a very bad idea.

Right.

Decision to do that.

But my son, after we made the decision, he said, you know, dad, I'm so.

And because he knew that was part of the reason why, I went.

And I reflected back instantly back to what Craig had asked me to do and the why.

And I said, dude, I'm okay with this decision.

He said, well, what do you mean?

You're pretty calm.

And you know me, I'm not that common guy when things are not going right.

And I said, look, I had four objectives to come.

One was an adventure.

One was with you.

One was.

There was a particular part of the mountain that we climbed.

It was my favorite day.

And one was to summit.

And I said, and then the fifth one was to get home safe.

Yeah.

Yeah.

So I said, I think I got 80% of what I came here because I think I'm okay.

Like, it's all good.

Right.

So, you know, I think that you.

If you think about some of the things that I've.

And.

And those kinds of things has really become much more prevalent in the way that I, you know, I approach things now than I probably ever did.

Right.

It all starts with Simon Sinek.

He's so.

Right.

It starts with why.

And if you have a strong why.

Yeah.

Would you do it again?

Yeah.

Yeah, I would.

You would try it again?

Well, it's.

It's.

There's an unchecked box there, right?

Yeah.

Yeah, I would.

I would do it again.

You know, I'm looking at other challenges.

I.

The one that I've been researching the most is the Camino.

So that's the pilgrimage across the top of Spain.

So that one's probably.

Well, when I formally retire, that's probably what I'll do.

I mean, I want to summit.

I do want to climb a mountain, and I want to jump out of a plane.

That's fine.

That's fine.

You've done that one.

I have done that one.

Yeah.

I highly recommend that one.

I have to just muster up.

It's just a little.

I've talked about it so much, and I.

And I don't even like to talk about it anymore because I just want to.

I just want to do it and then share the experience.

So.

So let's talk about, like, as we start to wrap up here, let's talk about now, this mission and how you are now leaning in to help executives, business owners, entrepreneurs, really start to thrive more in their lives.

Lives and what that looks like.

Yeah.

And I.

And when you and I talked earlier today, I was like, I'm not sure.

I gotta have the total answer on this.

And, you know, we're.

We're all on a journey, and I'm trying to figure that out.

But you know what?

I.

What I've.

When I look back at, you know, 35 years of experience, small business, large business, I think that there's a.

There's a.

Some companies have it right, but most don't in the way that they actually look after their employees.

And I won't go as far as, say, as corporations are broken, but somebody say, you know, I might.

I might wink, wink, nudge, nudge.

Say that maybe there's some things that they could be doing a little bit differently.

I really felt that as much as the safety net was there for me to get support that I needed for my counseling and so forth, a lot of it felt like a checkbox.

You're gonna kill me.

Oh, look at you.

No.

Well, they're gonna kill you.

Yes.

Because your voice here, you're.

I'm like.

I am so scared that this entire interview didn't pick up my voice.

Oh, no.

I don't know what.

In all my setup, I didn't pull my mic closer to my mouth.

We're going.

Yeah, we are going to hope.

Hope and pray that this actually.

Hope and pray.

But the microphone was actually facing the other way because it.

Anyway.

Yeah, I don't know.

Anyway, we'll see.

Yeah, keep going.

We'll see.

We'll see.

We might have to do that.

We might have to do this over.

We might have to do this over.

Okay.

Anyway.

But, yeah, so you know what?

I.

And this is one of the reasons why I took the heart math program and became certified.

A certified trainer.

There is the program that I took, what is called Activating the Heart of Teams.

And when I went through the course it was interesting because it was as much for me as it was for anybody else that I could help.

But what became really obvious was that things like meditation, things like all of these different techniques people are learning.

Heart math is put into a set of techniques.

You can go on the go with your eyes open and kind of just make sure that you're kind of in that heart centered moment or be live your, your, your, your life from a heart centered perspective.

Right.

So again, just being centered, it won't get into all the details around that.

That's a, that's a podcast for another.

Day, but might be very soon.

And my voice, you never know.

Pardon me.

But yeah, so, so it really, it really was all about for me how, how to, how, you know, companies are always looking for their teams to perform better.

They want numbers more and more and more, but the people are getting more and more frazzled, more and more burnt out, more and more.

I'm done.

Right.

And so this is a blend for me of how do I, how can I command and give people resiliency techniques individually and as a team so that they can, you know, be much more grounded, much more heart centered and knock it out of the park and then take those techniques home.

Right.

So that's kind of the thought process behind what's next, I think and whether that's on an individual basis, whether that's, you know, through some coaching or whether that's working with companies and teams.

And I was, I was, I thought I was pretty good at it when I was in the corporate space and my, you know, but I think this is a cool dimension to add.

I think so.

And I would say like I, if you remember.

Well, if you didn't hear me, I said, I said that you, you've been mentoring at a call now call your friend, you know, but I would say that you mentored me in my career and so, and I think just this experience that you've gone through is just further Enric.

What has always been inside of you.

Thank you.

It feels genuine and it feels correct.

Right?

Yeah, you are correct.

I love you, Paul Corper.

I've always loved you and you've always been there for me, even when I started this new role and I remember I had all these massive problems to solve and you've never ever, not once picked up my call and been willing to help.

It's just, I'm just so blessed.

I think I've also learned that, like, and it's hard, like, you know, I can say, you know, check in on people more often.

You know, I may not have been able to help you, but I know I.

I kind of thought about it.

I was like, man, I wish I had actually thought to check in on you.

I think we talked about it.

I think we had a mutual friend.

And that day I did actually call them.

Yeah.

To check in.

Yeah.

They.

Yeah.

So it's important.

It's important to remember.

It is.

But at the same time, it's like, life happens.

Right.

And then, you know, it's like, wow, it's five years ago.

Yeah.

Right.

You can think about even with your close friends.

Like, yeah, I'm supposed to get together with for dinner.

And it's like, it's three months for me.

Right.

Then let's go by.

It's like.

So it's really, really easy to, you know, time gets away from us and I guess that comes back to that living intentionally.

Right.

And for.

For yourself.

Not a selfish way, but living in the moment and, you know, being, you know, not to.

Not to get off into the heart.

Centricity piece of it.

But if you're leading from the heart, a lot of good things happen.

Yeah.

So as a final question, and this being the last episode of the series, you know, what are some of Paul's.

Again.

These are Paul's.

Paul's magic moments or Paul magic habits, you know, that, you know, especially the men that are listening could take and implement immediately just to start to just, you know, I love the.

I loved how your Marcy, I'm going to call her your Marcy really helped you.

One foot in front of the other.

And.

So what are some of those daily sins that you think are winning?

Winning.

Winning habits.

Yeah, I think that probably the.

So, yes, I mean, obviously I live by putting on your shoes.

Right.

Like that's.

That is kind of my mantra for everything now.

It's, you know, anything that you can think of, just that metaphor really is important.

You got a pile of work to do.

Just do something.

Right.

You can apply that metaphor, anything.

I think, you know, the thing that I've tried to embody every day is to give ourselves some grace.

We're all driven people, whether, you know, part of it's us, part of it's the society we live in, part of it's the companies we work for trying to do better for our families.

And we forget that, you know, we're.

We need to have some of that self Love, if you will.

And give ourselves some permission sometimes to just chill.

Right.

And just give ourselves.

Just give yourself a break.

Yeah.

You know, that's probably, probably number two on the, on the list for me.

Yeah.

I don't know.

There's probably a dozen other things that come up in and out.

Those are probably the two things.

I think grace is important.

Yeah.

We can be so hard on ourselves.

Right.

And like, you know, we're both in techno, you know, come from technology backgrounds and think about.

And a lot of businesses are like this.

We're always focused on the last half a percent.

So we're focused on the negative, but we don't look at the 99.9% of everything else that's going great.

Yeah.

Right.

And so it's, it's giving ourselves some perspective.

It's giving that.

And I think that the, you know, like I said, the, the one of the things that I'm learning, it's, it's not everybody's personality this way is.

But I'm, I'm trying to please Paul before I please others.

It's important.

Yeah.

Oxygen mask.

I love that analogy.

Yeah.

I do it all the time.

I'm like, you know, people don't know 4.10am in the morning till 8am in the morning is like.

And then again in the evening.

I shut down at 7:30.

It's like very, very, very small percentage of people can break through Fort Knox at 7:30pm But 4:10am to 8:00am is because the majority of the world's not up, at least in my hemisphere.

And I use that time to like, yeah, that's, that's my self care.

That's my, that's my time.

My time.

Yeah.

So important.

So Paul, thank you so much.

I, I feel so.

Anyway, I feel so.

What's the word?

Edified from this conversation with you.

And I'm really, really, really happy that we had this discussion and we made it work.

And we might have two because we'll have to see how this sound is.

I know, but I always make it work.

And if you're listening to this, it means that I managed to make this episode work.

And you got the real deal.

And you got the real deal.

Yes.

No retakes, no redo overs.

That's it.

Yeah.

Awesome.

Well, I really appreciate you.

Thanks.

Thanks for allowing me to share my story.

Yeah.

Thank you so much.

And to everyone that's listening, I trust that you are more empowered from this conversation and yes, I, I thank you.

And Paul, keep doing it and keep rising and keep changing lives.

And we'll do that.

And to everyone listening, this is where I sadly have to say, we're out.

Bye Bye.

There you have it.

I trust you are feeling more empowered in your skin.

As the late Dr.

Maya Angelou said, when you get, you give.

When you learn, you teach.

So it would mean so much for us at EIMS if you would share this episode and tag us or teach an insight that you took from today's episode on your socials and tag us.

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