Hollywood actress and podcast host, Alessandra Torresani joins the show to talk about living with Bipolar I Disorder in Hollywood, discussing everything from being misdiagnosed and discouraged from revealing her condition publicly to finally opening up on set about her struggles and starting her own podcast. 

EPISODE RESOURCES:

Connect with Alessandra on Instagram and Twitter

Learn more about NAMI, the National Alliance on Mental Illness

Listen to Alessandra’s interview with former co-star Eden Sher on her podcast EmotionAL Support

Thank you for listening! Follow Dr. Emily on Twitter, and don’t forget to follow, rate, review and share the show wherever you listen to podcasts! #EmotionallyFit 

Staying emotionally fit takes work and repetition. That's why the Emotionally Fit podcast with psychologist Dr. Emily Anhalt delivers short, actionable Emotional Push-Ups every Monday and Thursday to help you build a better practice of mental health and surprising, funny and shocking conversations on Taboo Tuesdays, because the things we’re most hesitant to talk about are also the most normal. So join us to kickstart your emotional fitness. Let's flex those feels and do some reps together!

The Emotionally Fit podcast is produced by Coa, your gym for mental health. Katie Sunku Wood is the show’s producer from StudioPod Media with additional editing and sound design by Nodalab, and featuring music by Milano. Special thanks to the entire Coa crew!

JUMP STRAIGHT INTO:

(01:20) - Alessandra on being diagnosed with Bipolar 1 Disorder - “It was this juxtaposition of like ‘Wow, I'm finally happy that I know what I am, but I can't share this with the world so I'm going to have to suffer in silence.’”

(9:18) - The first time Alessandra talked about mental health in public - “Once the first two questions were done, I was like ‘Okay, this is weird. What do we talk about now?’ I was supposed to be holding a town hall for an hour, so I said, ‘I'm Alessandra. I'm Bipolar. Does anyone have any questions on mental health?’”

(13:44) - Opening up about her condition in an audition - “I said, ‘I want to thank you so much. I live with Bipolar Disorder and I've never read something on a script, never read words that have affected me so much, that have been said so beautifully.’”

(17:32) - What Bipolar Disorder feels like to Alessandra - “I didn't pick the best job for mental illness, but I can't imagine doing anything else. So I think that the drive that I have for the continuing of the rejection is what keeps me going.”

(22:08) - Alessandra’s fanbase and the special connection between Sci-Fi and mental health - “Every single person that I met at this convention, they shared their stories, their families’ stories about mental health, about their journeys, about alcoholism, drug addiction, everything. They're just open beings.”

(25:26) - Alessandra’s advice for people speaking openly about their mental health struggles - “You have to be ready. You have to have a support system that's behind you because if you get a negative reaction, you need to know that there is someone there that you can talk to about it. To brush it off.”

When I feel a manic episode coming on, I feel that bipolar rush. It's like a volcano in your stomach and it's slowly, the lava keeps coming up and up and up to finally, you can't handle it anymore and you don't know why, but you just explode.

Welcome to Taboo Tuesday on The Emotionally Fit podcast. I'm Dr. Emily Anhalt, and I've always loved talking about taboo subjects, sex, money, drugs, death, because being a therapist has taught me that the feelings we're most hesitant to talk about are also the most normal. So join me as we flex our feels by diving into things you might not say out loud, but you're definitely not the only one thinking. Quick disclaimer that nothing in this podcast should be taken as professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Because while I am a therapist, I'm not your therapist and I'm not my guests' therapist. So this is intended only to spark interesting conversation. Thanks for tuning in.

Hey, there fit fans. I am here for today's Taboo Tuesday with Alessandra Torresani. Alessandra is an actress, a host, a creator, and a mental health advocate. She's dedicated to destigmatizing mental health by spreading kindness, compassion, and hope, and she brings a ton of fun and laughter to her mission by sharing her story about living with bipolar one disorder on her podcast, EmotionAL Support. On top of all that, Alessandra is a dear friend of mine. We met in kindergarten, and she inspired me to put myself out there in ways that, at the time, seemed totally intimidating. So I'm so grateful to her and I'm so happy to have her on the show today. Hey Alessandra.

Oh my gosh, Emily, this is amazing that this is happening right now, and I'm so proud of you. This is so fun.

I'm so glad to have you on because as you know, we're doing Taboo Tuesdays here on this podcast, which I absolutely love because the things that we don't talk about are the things that we should talk about. And today in particular, we have a really special episode because Alessandra, like I said, is a Hollywood actress. She's been in all kinds of amazing things that you have definitely seen. And she's also a person who's been diagnosed with bipolar disorder. And she's here today to talk about how taboo it can be to talk about the things that are true for us in our places of work. So Alessandra, before we dive into that, maybe just start by telling me a little about yourself.

Sure. Well, I'm a Hollywood actress, which I love, I'm going to now only allow my husband to call me a Hollywood actress. So this is the best thing that's ever happened to me. No, I am an actress. It's something that I've been doing my entire life. We talked earlier, you said you got into competitive dancing because of me, and that's true because that was my whole world. I basically just wanted to be on a stage. I wanted to perform. I wanted to be in front of the cameras, and lots of life lessons were learned through all of these experiences, which we'll get into. But most importantly, the reason why I'm here, I was diagnosed with bipolar one disorder when I was about 21, 22 years old. And so I've been living and thriving with it for about 34 now. So do the math, quite a long time.

And it's just been a struggle. And every day is a new day and still even medicated still feels like a struggle. So I decided to start a podcast called EmotionAL Support, where I interview like minded individuals, such as yourself, you were on the show and it was wonderful. And other celebrities and musicians and doctors and specialists and people that practice different types of mental health modalities to really selfishly learn more about my brain and see how we can all be there for one another and not be alone. So that's where I am today, just continuing on that journey.

Thank you for sharing that. I can only imagine, especially when you are on a stage and in the public eye, that it becomes much more complicated to grapple with your own mental health. I'm curious, what was it like before you got the diagnosis to be an actress who was struggling with bipolar disorder, and what was it like once you had the diagnosis?

It's so interesting to me because I was not diagnosed properly and was given antidepressants when I was 15 years old. They said, "Oh, she's just depressed. Give her this medicine." And it actually, as everyone seems to know now, and I didn't know this at the time, it makes your highs higher and your lows lower when you are bipolar. So it actually caused a lot of spiraling and a lot of darkness and a lot of sadness and a lot of suicidal ideations and thoughts and actions and really tough things. And I felt alone. And when I had finally gotten the diagnosis of living with bipolar disorder, I've talked to a lot of people about this, about their reactions. And for me, it was a sense of relief. It was like, wow, I finally have been heard. Someone finally can put a name to the problem, and there's going to be a solution for this.

So I was excited when I was diagnosed that I actually had something that I could grasp and hold onto. But the truth of the matter was when I started to share that with other producers and friends of mine and how excited I was, they said, "Oh my God, absolutely never talk about that because you don't want to be labeled as difficult. You don't want to be a diva. You hear bipolar, you think, oh my gosh."

At the time, they were throwing around Britney Spears was bipolar. That was the time that it was happening, when she was shaving her head and manically driving for hours on end all throughout the night. And so that's where that stigma came from. So it was this juxtaposition of wow, I'm finally happy that I know what I am, but I can't share this with the world so I'm going to have to suffer in silence once again and be shamed into it. So it was weird because both ways, I felt at a complete loss.

So you were living the stigma, even as internally, you were getting more comfortable and actually even supported and relieved by knowing what was going on.

Absolutely.

And so what did you do with that? Tell me a little bit about, you've got the diagnosis now, you've been told you shouldn't share it, but here you are doing this work where I would imagine if there wasn't so much of a stigma, it'd be helpful for everyone to know, so that you're all on the same page and so that you can get the support that you need. So what did you do then? How did you manage that?

I managed it by doing what I do best, making jokes out of things. So I would totally turn it into comedy and make it funny. Like, oh, she's the crazy bipolar girl, ha ha. Inside jokes with just friends and family. I would share in relationships after a while of being in a relationship with someone, and it had been held against me a lot of the time. And so that was also really hard and that stigma and the shame behind it, it was very shameful. So I slowly would bring it out here and there to people that I would feel comfortable with.

And the first real time that I ever had heard someone else living with bipolar disorder was when I was on a set, I was shooting a movie in Atlanta and I was in a full panic mode because I had been flown immediately to Atlanta to shoot this movie. I didn't have enough of my medication with me. I could not get the pharmacist on the phone to then talk to my doctor to fill the prescription in time. I was on set. So I was actually on the phone with my mom, and I was like screaming. And I was like, "I don't know what to do. I need this medicine. Someone's got to figure it out, otherwise I'm going to just absolutely go crazy right now." And one of my co-stars, Eden Cher says to me, "Oh, are you okay? Did they forget your birth control or something? What do you need?" Trying to comfort me. And I go, "Oh, I actually," I said, "I actually am on this medicine called Lamictal, I actually live with bipolar disorder. You'll find out eventually or something."

And she looked at me and it was this moment. I tear up every time thinking about it because it was the first time that I felt heard on a set because she lives with bipolar disorder as well, bipolar one disorder. And we both were on Lamictal at the time. And we joke that you shouldn't do this now, but she was like, "I have medicine if you need it in case it doesn't get filled in time." So it was the first time that I felt this sense of relief, and it was the first time she had felt that sense of relief because we were both shamed into you should never talk about this. And here's someone that I've respected as an actress for years and was a fan of, I had no idea. And she had no idea that I was living with this. And from then on out, I said, F it, I'm going to start talking about this and share this experience.

And since you have started sharing about it, which obviously as a person who's all about talking about taboo topics and breaking stigma and being transparent, I am fully supportive of it. And I know that it's not the case that there are always zero consequences to that. So I'm curious, once you did start sharing that, how was it received and how did it land with people?

The first time I really started sharing about it was actually at a convention for a TV show that I had done a quick guest spot on. And it was before my podcast and before any of that had come full circle, and I was very uncomfortable. I was not the cast member that this show convention wanted. I was just the extra fill in that, oh, it would be fun if she was here, I guess let's throw her in there, and I was in a foreign country. I was in England, and I didn't know anyone, and I didn't know anyone on the show that I was with either because it wasn't my show. I was just a guest star. And the audience was supposed to be a thousand people plus, and only 20 people showed up and no one asked questions.

And once the first two questions were done, I was like, okay, this is weird. What do we talk about now? I'm supposed to be holding a town hall for an hour. So I said, "I'm Alessandra, I'm bipolar. Does anyone have any questions on mental health?" And all these people started showing up, and people went into the outside of the conference and brought these people back in, and they were all asking questions. And there's one specific woman who came up to me afterwards who showed me scars on her arms from her self harm. And she said, "I never knew that someone on television could be affected the same way that I was." And while I wasn't harming myself physically that way, we related the same way. We understood each other. I heard her, she heard me.

Representation matters.

It matters. It really does. And I was also very lucky to already have started a relationship with NAMI, the National Alliance on Mental Illness and being an ambassador for them because I had openly spoken out on my own to them. I had approached them and said, "I've never felt a community before like this. I would love to do anything I can." So I just independently was trying to, not scream it from the rooftops, here I am out and proud, but make it my mission to meet community where I was feeling heard and safe and secure again, because I had lacked that for so many years.

So now with the podcast and having the help of so many wonderful people start it with me, encouraging me that they would be my guest, that I wouldn't be alone on this, it's been quite the reaction. And it's really a vulnerable state to be in that I recommend to everyone when you're ready to share your story, share your story, because you don't know who's listening. You could share your story and that person listens and is like, oh cool, that's awesome. But they share it with someone else, and that person, the one that you never meet, that's the one that's affected. And that's the one that you saved their life. And you never even knew that.

So I think that it's hard. You really have to figure out when you're ready, then share it because there's a lot of pressure and there's a lot of heaviness that's involved and you have to also be able to put up boundaries of I'm not a doctor, I'm not a specialist. I cannot give you advice about medication. I'm not giving you advice on if you're feeling suicidal. I can't be the one that saves you, but I can be here to share stories where you can feel heard. And maybe that story can make you not feel alone for that day.

Which is so much more powerful than I think we realize until we need it and get it. And it shifts everything. I really appreciate that your answer wasn't like, just tell everyone. It's fine. Because it's not always fine.

No, I don't think you should. No. No, no, no. You have to really be ready because I still, on the regular, get hate all day long. I have people that write me that are like, "You're probably not even bipolar. I'm sure you're fine. And you're just doing it for popularity." And I was like, I really don't think it's making me that popular, but thanks.

Who has the time to send these hate messages? It's really like...

Lots of men. You would be surprised. Lots of men.

That makes sense. That makes actual sense.

No surprise.

I'm curious. Have you ever had the experience where you've disclosed it or shared it, whether it was on set or with friends or with colleagues and it was not received in a way that felt good and supported?

Yeah, totally. It's funny because in past relationships, it was never received well. This is the first relationship with my husband, so I'm lucky I married him. But it was the first one where it was not ever held against me. For example, I was cheated on one time and it was my fault because I was bipolar and I was crazy and difficult to deal with. So that happens a lot. With work, I luckily haven't seemed to have found anything where it has not benefited me.

In fact, I auditioned for a role on the TV show, Batwoman, and the way the role was written, it's the Joker's daughter and she's bipolar schizophrenic. There's all sorts of mental issues and it makes her to be a serial killer. And there was a particular scene in that where she, Duela Dent, punches a mirror because she doesn't like what she sees in the mirror. And she grabs piece of the mirror and she marks up her whole face and it's blood and it's gory and it's fun. It sounds really grim, but it's not, it's fun. It's a great show. And it was the first time that I read a script where I felt so moved to be like, I know exactly what this woman is feeling. I've been there. I have punched many a mirrors in my day. I don't recommend it. It's not good luck. Don't do it. But I have done that and I have been there.

And so I was so curious. I wonder if the writer lives with bipolar disorder. I wonder if they know someone who may be experiencing it, but it was written in a beautiful way that was very honest and true, and didn't make her a monster. It made her truly a human. When I was in the audition, I did the lines and afterwards I go, "I'm so sorry." And I had never done this before, but I said, "I want to thank you so much." I said, "I live with bipolar disorder and I've never read something on a script, I've never read words that have affected me so much that have been said so beautifully and exactly the feeling that someone would feel that's going through a mental illness." And there was no shame there.

And they were like, "Oh my God, thank you so much. That really means a lot." And I got the role from it. So I was like, wow. Maybe there is something about honesty and openness and being genuinely who you are that may work. And for me, that story inspires me to keep on being myself. Because the first time I was honest, I got something positive from that. So maybe I'm going to keep on doing that.

That is amazing. The sense I get from acting, and tell me if I'm wrong on this, because I'm certainly not an actress, is that the circumstances that you're acting out are scripted, but the emotions you're conveying have to be real on some level, I'd imagine.

A hundred percent.

And so for you to be able to feel these emotions in the form that they take uniquely in people who struggle in this way, I imagine that really made you exactly right for that role.

Yeah. I definitely felt all the feels in that audition, for sure. It was a roller coaster, but it was the best time that I had on a set in a really long time, because it was fun. It was fun to be able to play a character like that.

Like yourself.

And be able to relate to it, like myself. Yeah. I said, "She's exactly like me, minus the serial killer."

Which we appreciate.

Which we appreciate. It gets me in less trouble.

That's amazing. One thing I think would be helpful is what does bipolar disorder look like for you? Because we have these broad diagnoses that apply to all kinds of things. And I'm curious in your life, how does this show up? What does it look like?

Oh, I love that question, because it is so different for everyone. For me, it's all about frustration. The best way for me to explain it is when I feel a manic episode coming on, I feel that bipolar rush. It's like a volcano in your stomach and it's slowly, the lava keeps coming up and up and up to finally, you can't handle it anymore and you don't know why, but you just explode. And I get really upset because a lot of people go, "Oh, well, it sounds like it's anger management." I'm like, "But I'm not angry. I'm just frustrated." And I have all these explosive emotions that want to come out. So that's really what I feel. It feels like this mania, and then you get a sense of depression, which I don't have that much anymore like I used to, but you really beat yourself up. And perfectionism is a really hard thing for me. And I don't do things perfectly. I've noticed that's a trigger for an episode that might come up.

One that I imagine is perpetuated by your industry.

Yeah. Totally. I didn't pick the best job for the mental illness, but it's something that I say I can't imagine doing anything else. So I think that the drive that I have for the continuing of the rejection is what keeps me going. And that's tough for a lot of people, and that's why I don't recommend being an actress, unless you really are gray with rejection all day every day and be able to accept it.

I've been asked this quite a bunch about, have you ever had a manic episode on set? And I only had one panic attack and it was before I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder and it wasn't even a manic episode, it was more just triggered by my grandmother's stroke. I just felt very overwhelmed and didn't know what anxiety was. It's funny, when you find something that you passionately love, somehow your brain is tricked into just being the best version it can be during that time. That's what I've felt in my experience.

Well, I know that there's a biological component to bipolar disorder, such that it's possible no matter what circumstances you're in, you would struggle in some way. But I believe very deeply that the way our struggles manifest have a lot to do with how supported we are in leaning into our experiences. Do we have the permission and tools and support and space and love to feel our feelings? And it sounds like when you went from feeling like you had to hide it to feeling like you could express it, it actually changed the very chemistry of the struggle.

Oh, I completely, completely am behind that. I think that it made me less depressed in a sense, because I felt I could finally be myself. And I think I also was very lucky that it happened to be right around the time that people were accepting mental illness. Not that it's a hundred percent better. When I started talking about it, it was right at the beginning and now it seems to be in every movie and every TV show and every song and every actor, everything. But I think people were ready to start having the conversation, and they were afraid to have the conversation with people. So when someone was open and honest about it, they gravitated towards that person.

I remember I did an interview with my friend Candace King, and she was on The Vampire Diaries and she has known me for years. And she said, "It's so strange because I never would feel comfortable even being your friend being like, so how's bipolar disorder? What's it like?" And she's like, "It took me being a guest on your podcast for me to feel comfortable to ask the questions." But I think that now we're in a state where, when you are open people in your life even I feel, my close friends are opening up about their own personal struggles that they wouldn't have done before if I wasn't open about it. And it's a beautiful thing. It's really nice to know that everyone is dealing with something, whether it's a big extreme or not, there's a struggle. And we all learn that, especially during the pandemic that we all have mental health that we need to work on.

Big time. Obviously I'm biased because I know and adore you, but following you over the years, I feel like you have a special fan base because they don't just love your characters, they also really love what you give them permission to do, which is to speak whatever is true for them and to not be perfect and to grapple and struggle. And that there's something really just so powerful about seeing someone you admire be fallible.

Oh my God, thank you. I try. I try to be very honest and even in my really sad times and dark times and crying times, I try to show that. I want everyone to know I still have really bad days, really bad days. And I think that's what I've been very lucky with the fan base that I have and the following and those that listen and do all those amazing things, they have not just followed me through one character, they've continued to follow my complete whole journey. And what I will say is I love my fan base because there's something about the sci-fi world, and there's something about where the imagination is bigger than anyone could ever imagine. They are just the most open individuals with their imaginations and their hearts.

And there's something also that I think the reason why when the universe, whoever it is that got me this role of this one sci-fi show that I did, Caprica, which started a big fan base, there's something about sci-fi where there's a connection to mental health. I don't know what it is about vulnerability, and these wonderful humans have found each other, and that's their connection is when they meet at these conventions, and they bond over a particular show and they're very open and honest. And it was every single person, Emily, that I met at this convention. They share their stories, their family stories about mental health, about their journeys about alcoholism, drug addiction, everything. They're just open beings. And I'm so lucky that I was able to have met them all through this one show for them to continue on this journey with me because it's wild.

I don't know for sure, but I can make a guess about what that connection might be between sci-fi and people who are talking about mental health, which is, I imagine that if this world, this universe, this existence didn't catch you the way you needed to be caught, that it would be very appealing to think about other worlds, other universes, other existences, where things could be the way that you needed them to be. And so-

Totally.

Imagine that the sci-fi world is full of misfits and unique individuals who didn't quite find what they needed here. And so they're like, "Well, what else could be out there?"

Yeah, no, absolutely. I actually didn't even think of that, but it's true. It's like the possibilities are endless. And I think that's what's really special, and I'm really lucky that I have the best fan base in the world.

Well, lucky and you put yourself out there, and I guess what I'm curious about is do you have any, I don't like the word advice, but do you have any thoughts for people who are grappling with their own mental health struggles and trying to decide when to disclose, when to talk about it, when to share versus when for various reasons it's actually important not to?

Totally. First and foremost, the best thing that you could do for yourself is to find a community that you can have the conversation with openly, whether that be group therapy, whether it be, I don't know, a Facebook group or EmotionAL Support. We have a Facebook group that people just write in and give advice to one another, and it's not professional advice. It's just like, "Hey, I'm having a really bad day. Is anyone else feeling this way?" It's very simple. And I think that's important to know that you're not alone. That's something that I recently felt like I lacked so much. I lacked a community, a specific community with my mental health, where I was struggling and really needing that. And so when you find that and you find someone that understands and can listen to you, it feels really nice.

So that would be my first thing that I would say. And in regards to sharing your story, when is the right time? There is no right time unless you are ready. For me, when I was slowly sharing things here and there, I think it was me meeting this woman who was showing me why my story was important to share, showing her struggles of not knowing that someone on TV could feel the same way that she felt. I don't know if it was a sign from the aliens or whatever, but it was a sign for me that was if this one story that I said just off the top of my head, because I was uncomfortable changed someone's life, then why am I not sharing this?

For me, when I heard Carrie Fisher talk about bipolar disorder, she was my icon just because I was like, oh my God, I was obsessed with Princess Leia and everything that she did in her writing and everything was just so beautiful about her. So for me, if I could do that for someone else, why wouldn't I? So I think you have to be ready, but you have to have a support system that's behind you. Because if you get a negative reaction, which I've gotten many a times, or you've had the asshole comments that have come a lot of the time, you need to know that there is someone there that you can talk to about it to brush it off. So that's why I say make sure that you have a community or a support system behind you before you share your story, because there will inevitably be negativity. There always is. There's just people in the world that just want to put you down and want to hate. And we just have to accept that we can't change them, but we can be there for the other people.

That's a powerful metaphor for life in general. I think when we have a community that loves our whole selves, then we can withstand not being received perfectly well in every moment.

Well, Alessandra, you're just such an inspiration and so wonderful to speak with you. The way that we end these Taboo Tuesdays is that I'm going to show you a list of questions that are taboo for all kinds of reasons. It might be taboo because it talks about sex or death or money or therapy or drugs. And so you're going to look over this list and just feel free to read them and then pick whichever one you want to answer, read that question out loud, and then answer that question.

Ooh. Okay. Ooh. Well, I like what's the most trouble you've ever gotten into because it's a childhood story and it's great because I don't remember who I was with and I could have been with you, but I don't think so. But I got in trouble because my mom took me to McDonald's, and I went to the Play Place and I was with a group of four people. And we really loved the ball pit, the balls that were the plastic balls. And so I took them out with me and I put them in the back seat of her car.

How many?

I think I had about maybe 12. I put them all in my sweatshirt. I was like a pregnant woman, all in my sweatshirt. As if she wouldn't notice, and she turns around and sees all the balls and she goes, "Alessandra, what are you doing? What is this?"

And for many reasons, I think she was concerned why I'm stealing the McDonald's plastic Play Place balls. Now looking at it as an adult who's lived through a pandemic, I'm like that's repulsive and disgusting on so many levels. But also it was teaching me you don't steal things. So she made me turn around, and we had to take all the plastic balls, and we had to go to the front desk and apologize and give them back. And I think they were so confused, the workers, why we were taking these plastic balls. And I got in trouble. I got in so much trouble because of that. And that was the only time I ever stole something, and I never forget about that. And that's why I always am the first to, even when I pull a piece for a premiere or something, I have to return it right away, because I'm so afraid that someone's going to ever accuse me of stealing something.

That is so funny. To me, it makes so much sense. This is this happy place for you, you want to bring a piece of it home and continue the joy. I empathize with that child.

Thank you. Thank you.

Glad you learned a lesson too. Amazing. Well, Alessandra, thank you so much for being here, for all that you share with the world and for giving, perhaps, some of our listeners a boost to find their community and share their selves a little bit more freely today.

Before I sign off, what do you want to tell all our listeners about how can they get more of you? How can they connect with you outside of here?

Ooh, we have amazing new episodes of EmotionAL Support that come out every Tuesday. Some awesome ones, some very special surprises that are coming your way. So you can find it at EmotionALSupportPod.com or wherever you listen to any of your podcasts. It's just EmotionAL Support, spelled emotional support.

Fantastic. I love it. I'm a listener.

And you were on it.

Yes. Couldn't support it more. Thank you so much, my dear, and I will speak with you soon.

Thank you. Thank you.

Thanks for listening to Emotionally Fit, hosted by me, Dr. Emily Anhalt. New Taboo Tuesdays drop every other week. How did today's taboo subject land with you? Tweet your experience with the hashtag emotionally fit and follow me at Dr. Emily Anhalt.

Please rate, review, follow, and share the show wherever you listen to podcasts. This podcast is produced by Coa, your gym for mental health, where you can take live therapist led classes online. From group sessions to therapist matchmaking, Coa will help you build your emotional fitness routine. Head to JoinCoa.com. That's JoinCoa.com to learn more. And follow us on Twitter and Instagram at @joincoa. From StudioPod Media in San Francisco, our producer is Katie Sunku Wood. Music is by Milano. Special thanks to the entire Coa crew!