DESCRIPTION: A blistering takedown of Newark Airport's laughably antiquated air traffic control system, where Philadelphia manages New York's skies through copper wires and prayers. From tech older than Y2K to controllers surviving on coffee and spite, this rant exposes the terrifying comedy of America's "safest" aviation system.

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Because when your government runs critical infrastructure like a community theater production of "Apocalypse Now," maybe - and hear me out - that's a problem? We're literally trusting our lives to systems so outdated they make Windows 95 look futuristic. It's not just incompetence; it's weaponized stupidity wrapped in bureaucratic red tape and served with a side of "thoughts and prayers."