Speaker:
00:00:00
This one's for everyone who's ever wondered, can I love my neighbor without
Speaker:
00:00:04
making them a casserole? Because let's be honest, church
Speaker:
00:00:07
culture sometimes makes it feel like the most sacred spiritual act
Speaker:
00:00:11
is signing up for a meal train before your coffee even kicks in.
Speaker:
00:00:15
Welcome to Messy Advice for People Who Care, a summer series from
Speaker:
00:00:19
Journey with Care to anyone who's ever said yes before thinking it through and then
Speaker:
00:00:22
wondering what they just signed up for. We're talking about caregiving,
Speaker:
00:00:26
boundaries, burnout, and the not so clear moments of loving others
Speaker:
00:00:30
well, minus the formulas. This is Johan on
Speaker:
00:00:34
the edge of helpful because someone has to answer the hard questions,
Speaker:
00:00:38
and apparently it's me.
Speaker:
00:00:42
We've all felt the weight of care, whether it's in ministry,
Speaker:
00:00:46
family, work, or just trying to be a decent human
Speaker:
00:00:50
being. And sometimes that weight turns into something we were
Speaker:
00:00:53
never meant to carry. Today's question gets right into the
Speaker:
00:00:57
heart of that tension. How do I show up for
Speaker:
00:01:01
others without always feeling like I'm responsible for fixing
Speaker:
00:01:04
everything? Now that's a big one, and,
Speaker:
00:01:08
honestly, a lot of us are asking the same thing.
Speaker:
00:01:11
According to Stats Canada, nearly one in four Canadians, that's
Speaker:
00:01:15
around 8,000,000 people, provided some form of unpaid
Speaker:
00:01:18
caregiving, and more than half of them reported feeling tired,
Speaker:
00:01:22
anxious, or overwhelmed by it. So, yeah, statistically
Speaker:
00:01:26
speaking, if you're feeling overwhelmed, it might just mean that you're doing
Speaker:
00:01:30
life in Canada correctly. But let's zoom in on what it
Speaker:
00:01:34
actually feels like. Now my first piece of advice
Speaker:
00:01:38
would be delete the phrase, just let me know if you need anything
Speaker:
00:01:41
from your vocabulary. It's vague, passive, and
Speaker:
00:01:45
emotionally loaded. And if you do let them know, you're
Speaker:
00:01:49
probably gonna panic. Picture this. You're in the
Speaker:
00:01:52
church lobby after service. Someone shares that they're having a hard
Speaker:
00:01:56
week. You nod, smile, and suddenly feel that pressure
Speaker:
00:02:00
building. Should I offer help? Should I bring a meal?
Speaker:
00:02:03
Should I be doing more? That moment, that's compassion
Speaker:
00:02:08
spiked with panic and seasoned with a little savior complex.
Speaker:
00:02:12
We've all felt it. It's the quiet assumption that love
Speaker:
00:02:15
equals action equals fixing equals exhaustion.
Speaker:
00:02:20
But does it? Let's get biblical.
Speaker:
00:02:23
Biblical. This brought me back to Mark one.
Speaker:
00:02:28
Jesus had been healing the sick, casting out demons, meeting
Speaker:
00:02:31
real urgent needs, and the crowds are still
Speaker:
00:02:35
pressing in. And the next morning, Jesus
Speaker:
00:02:38
disappears. The disciples go on a full manhunt.
Speaker:
00:02:42
And when they finally find him withdrawn from the crowd and praying, they
Speaker:
00:02:46
say, everyone's looking for you. And Jesus says,
Speaker:
00:02:50
well, let's go somewhere else. You see, Jesus doesn't
Speaker:
00:02:54
rush to meet every need. He doesn't react to that
Speaker:
00:02:57
pressure that was put on him. He chooses what's next,
Speaker:
00:03:02
not out of guilt, but out of purpose. That's not
Speaker:
00:03:05
indifference, it's clarity. Jesus shows us that love
Speaker:
00:03:09
isn't always about doing more. Sometimes it's about doing what's
Speaker:
00:03:13
right and letting go of the rest. So maybe the question
Speaker:
00:03:16
for you isn't, am I doing enough? Maybe it's,
Speaker:
00:03:20
am I doing what's mine to do? This week, try showing
Speaker:
00:03:24
up in love, but with honesty, not from guilt and not from
Speaker:
00:03:27
pressure. And if that sounds impossible, maybe that's where the
Speaker:
00:03:31
spirit meets us, in the pause between urgency and
Speaker:
00:03:35
obligation. Love becomes more sustainable when it's guided
Speaker:
00:03:38
by purpose, not pressure. And, hey, if that hits
Speaker:
00:03:42
close to home, you're not alone. These aren't just questions that we ask
Speaker:
00:03:46
on the mic. They're the kind that live in the background of a lot of
Speaker:
00:03:49
care filled lives. And if you wanna join the conversation,
Speaker:
00:03:53
come join us on the Care Impact podcast group on Facebook.
Speaker:
00:03:57
Until next time, keep loving, keep laughing, and set the
Speaker:
00:04:00
casserole down unless it's already in the oven, in which case,
Speaker:
00:04:04
bless you and remember to stay curious.
