A solo mom's journey can seem daunting and insurmountable. But remember that you're not alone. 

In this episode features the indomitable Tanya Davis, a life coach who turned adversity into a platform for inspiring and empowering single moms and career women. Tanya's journey as a single mother began during her senior year in college. From the shock of being turned away from government assistance for being over the limit by merely $4, to finding the strength to leave a toxic relationship, she shares the raw and powerful truth of her experience. 

Her path of resilience and determination will resonate if you're navigating similar circumstances.

My candid conversation with Tanya continues as she delves into the realities of an empty nest. She shares how she overcame the silence and filled the void when her son left home during the pandemic. She also reveals her motivation behind coaching single moms and career women, emphasizing the power of self-belief and perseverance. Tanya's wisdom is a testament to her strength and is sure to empower you to face your challenges with renewed energy and conviction.

In the final segment of our chat, Tanya discusses the significance of a supportive circle and how her background in auditing and change management aided her journey. She talks about her faith and the role of prayer in her transformation, offering a poignant reminder of the power of belief. 

In a generous move, Tanya also provides practical advice for struggling single moms, underlining the importance of self-care. She even reveals details about her upcoming events and programs in Colorado, extending a lifeline to those who need it. Tanya's story is a resounding affirmation of the strength and resilience within us all. 

So listen and be inspired!

Connect with Tanya: Website | Instagram | Facebook

Don't parent alone. If you need to talk, I'm here. Use this link to book a one-on-one call with me. It's free. Remember you're not alone.

Check out our YouTube channel @solomomstalktv

This podcast is hosted by Captivate, try it yourself for free.

Mentioned in this episode:

Mentoring invitation

[00:00:00] Having difficulty with your teen. Are you struggling with finding solutions to your everyday parenting problems? Being a solo mom can be tough. I know with all things you juggle mostly for your children. Your left. With very little time for yourself. [00:00:15] It can be hard to see your way out from where you are currently. But what if I told you. That you can change your life. And the lives of your children. As a Christian solo mom of three adult sons, I know firsthand some of the challenges you face. [00:00:33] But I also discovered that when I shifted my mindset, I was able to transform my life in some amazing ways. [00:00:41] Hi, I'm J. Rosemarie your personal, confident and mentor. I invite you to connect with me and take the first step towards transforming your life. Together, we can work to find solutions to your ongoing challenges. [00:00:56] And create a life you desire for yourself and your children. [00:01:00] I no, this is not about fixing. This is about us working together. To achieve your goals. So, if you're ready to take the next step to empower yourself, to transform your life, click the link below. And sign up for a free consultation call with me. [00:01:20] I look forward to hearing from you and helping you on your journey to becoming the best version of yourself.

Don't Parent in Silence

Hello Solo Moms. As a solo mom of three adult sons, I understand the challenges you face on a daily basis. As a mentor, my mission is to help you shift your mindset and empower you to take control of your life, to see yourself as God sees you. I know that unresolved trauma can be a heavy burden to carry and parenting alone can be a lonely journey, but it doesn't have to be that way. I want you to know that you are not alone. You have the strength and resilience to overcome your challenges and create the life you desire. Speaker 1: 0:41 I want to help you to make the effort to tackle unresolved trauma and change your perspective so you can live the life you deserve. I offer complimentary consultation where we can discuss how to move forward, create a plan to help you heal and empower you. You can schedule a consultation by emailing me at jen@jrosemarie.com or by calling + 1-917-994-1329 (WhatsApp), or schedule a consultation with the link below. I am here for you and I want to help you take the first step toward healing and empowerment. Don't let unresolved trauma hold you back any longer. Don't parent in silence. Take action today and let's work together to empower you to live the life you desire. Thank you.

J. Rosemarie : 0:00 Tired, weary, frustrated. What would you be doing if you weren't raising children alone? What's stopping you from living your best life? Now, on Solar Mom's talk, I discuss with Solar Mothers the challenges you face raising children alone. So if you're a working Solar Mom dealing with independent children, insensitive bosses, weight and health issues or even debt collectors, join us as we discover your path to get and stay healthy, increase your income and live with joy and purpose. J. Rosemarie: 1:00

My guest today is Tanya Davis. She's a life coach who's passionate about empowering women or juggling a career and single motherhood. Welcome, Tanya. Tanya Davis: 1:11 Thank you. Thank you, Jen, for having me. I really do appreciate it. J. Rosemarie: 1:14 Yes, it's my pleasure. Thank you for coming. Before we get into what you do and your life story as much as you want to share, could you tell us who is Tanya Davis? Tanya Davis: 1:27 So I am. I don't know. I thought about this question for a while. How do I answer this? And so really, who I am is I'm multifaceted. But first, who I am is I am a servant. I am a servant leader who enjoys helping to be able to empower single moms and career women. I'm a single mom myself. I'm actually transitioning to an empty nester. I've been an empty nester now probably for about two or three years, but the first year I did it all the way, except me being an empty nester and still clinging on a little bit to my son. I am a newlywed, so I just got married last year, and then also I am a government employee, so I enjoy helping our small businesses be able to grow and excel within the government sector. J. Rosemarie: 2:24 Okay, all right, thank you. So lots to unpack and lots of value in your experience and background. So feel free to share as openly as you want to. Okay, okay, stay awesome, okay. So the first part I want you to share as much as you can is how did you become a single mom, or solo mom as we like to say here, and I usually ask this question because someone else can learn from whatever challenge you face and how you overcame those challenges. I mean, your children are grown now. So are mine, but tell us you know any party journey that you could share with us. We'd appreciate it. Tanya Davis: 3:08 Yeah, so I became a single mom. Really Well, I became pregnant during my senior year of college and at that time I had many people wanting me to take alternative routes for becoming a parent, because they were fearful of what this journey may be, or really just kind of dropping their fear onto me. And so I decided during college to continue on with my studies and to also continue on with having my son. And so at the time when I finally did his name Sammy, when I finally did have Sammy, I still didn't fully realize that I was a solo mom. I was still holding onto that hope, or that perfect picture that we oftentimes imagine, that oh, it's he's. You know the father's going to stay, the father will be there and we're going to be this perfect family, right With the big house and a white picket fence and 2.5 children. That didn't work out very well, and so when I first ended up being a single mom, I first realized that when I went to the building, to the, to get governmental assistance, and, you know, during this time I was asking the father. You know, I need your help, I need assistance, and at this time we were young and we were going back and forth in regards to the custody, the money and everything else that comes with becoming that new solo parent right, holding onto that passion, holding onto that love, holding onto anger as well. And so I went to this building to try to get help and I remember filling out all the paperwork. So at the time it was not really streamlined. You had to fill out a lot like 20 different papers right To be able to get assistance. And so I remember filling out all the paperwork and telling them you know, I have a job lined up. I'm just on a deferment right now. I'll start my career in six months. And so they saw the paperwork, they saw the salary that I would be making and they turned me away. They turned me away because I made $4 over $4 over the limit and I was told no, we aren't able to help you at this time. And I just remember just so you know I'm not gonna lie we went back and forth, right, with some conversation. I'll put it that way we went back and forth with some conversation and I just went to the lobby and cried and just realized, wow, I'm really in this by myself, I'm really in this alone, and I don't know what resources or what connection points that I can have to be able to get help. And so I believe it was at that moment where I truly realized that, okay, I'm going to have to figure this out, I'm going to have to get and I was already strong but I'm really going to have to wrap my head around. What are the kind of, what are the next steps? What are the actions that I need to take in order to really ensure that my son succeeds and then also that I succeed in this? So and there's more to that in regards to what was happening within, also realizing that there was a toxic relationship, a relationship that was not healthy, but you know, it takes seven to 10 times to be able to get out of a toxic relationship. And so I think I was probably right there at six, right, and I was kind of realizing that I had to get out. I was still, I was still holding on, still holding on, still holding on. But you know, when the carpet's pulled from underneath you, you have no choice but to get up and to keep walking. Yeah, at that point, that's what I realized is that I must get up, I must keep walking and at some point, when I get to you know number eight, number nine, number 10, then it's time to go. And it still took a while after that, probably a few years after that, several years after that, to truly realize that, you know, I must pour into myself in order to be able to pour into my son and help him to succeed. J. Rosemarie: 7:27 Yeah, yeah, it's definitely a struggle, especially when there's a third party, and If they're not involved, then that's what they are a third party that we, we can hold on to and just Do they just mock up the system, don't they? Yeah, yeah, you let them mock up the system. So you know, I understand that because I've been there. Tanya Davis: 7:52 Say like enough is enough. You know Stronger than this, I'm bigger than this. Yeah. J. Rosemarie: 7:58 I. Tanya Davis: 8:00

Believe them in my own strength. I believe, first of all, in the Lord and what he has done, and that he'll get me through, just like he got me through so much more. J. Rosemarie: 8:08 Yes, yes, definitely, and it isn't it amazing how You're expected to survive on money that just Isn't there yet, or was there last year, but it's not there right now. Nobody seems to understand that the money you made last year, if you're not making it now, it doesn't really matter what you made last year. Tanya Davis: 8:34 And what was about that situation is that, you know, I had a letter saying that I will be working, but I had just graduated from college. So I really, oh my gosh and it's not like my parents would not have been there for me, they would have, you know. But there's something that I guess it's just me really being independent and me saying I chose to have my son and so I need to make this. I need to make this work.

J. Rosemarie: 9:02 Right yeah. Tanya Davis: 9:03 Yeah, I don't know they. They told me that I had enough money and I was like well, I got four dollars in my bank account. J. Rosemarie: 9:09 So yeah, I don't. I don't get that. They're basing You're your kid wanting to eat today on the money you're gonna be making next month or next year or whatever. It's just just unbelievable, right.

Tanya Davis: 24:18 I mean, you know, it was tempting right, yeah. I was in my. I was in my twenties. You know I got pregnant at 21. So I was not able to enjoy the full benefits of being 21. J. Rosemarie : 24:31 Yeah. Tanya Davis: 24:32

J. Rosemarie: 25:29 Okay, awesome, thank you. And how can we get in touch with you? Give us your handles, you know, just tell us. Tanya Davis: 25:37

J. Rosemarie: 25:52 Okay, and we'll put those links in the show notes, don't we? Oh, okay, okay, yeah, we will. I always like you to repeat it so that if somebody's listening to the podcast, they can just switch if they need to. You know, so it's convenient. Yeah, that works. Yeah, yeah, yeah, all right, I really appreciate you coming and spending some time with us and, before I let you go, do you have one or two pieces of advice for a solo mom in a situation? Tanya Davis: 26:23 My advice is to really take it one step at a time, to be able to understand that it may look difficult now, but, as we always say, joy comes in the morning. So it seems like there may not be a solution right now, but to understand that with action, with movement, that something will come. And to just keep that in mind, keep moving, keep going and just understand to also take care of yourself. Not we pour into our kids a lot, which is understandable, but also pour into yourself because, as we both realize, you're soon to become an empty nester. They don't stay kids forever. So just to remember, to always think about what are those next steps that you're gonna go into? J. Rosemarie: 27:10 Right, okay, thank you, tanya Davis, for coming and talking to us on solo mom's talk. I really appreciate you.

Okay, and anything else you wanted to share before we go. Tanya Davis: 27:28 No, not that I can think of right now. Just please look at our website. We will have classes and groups opening up at the beginning of next year, and we also have an event coming up in November. That's in person.

Okay, all right, thank you. Thank you. No, hang up yet. All right, okay, thank you.