My mindset coach, Jen Diaz, has made all the difference in my business. A few weeks ago, not only did I make $300k during a launch event, but my team and I actually enjoyed the process. Today I have Jen on the show to debrief the launch and share some of her coaching genius with you!

We cover a lot of what makes up a growth mindset: Knowing yourself, having confidence, focusing on what’s within your control, embracing the learning process, being ok with failure, etc.

“Growth mindset” can seem like a really fuzzy concept. I hope that this episode helps you understand it better and apply it in your own life.

In this episode, you’ll hear…

• What confidence is, and what it isn’t
• Why you should make sure your daily business tasks are ones you enjoy
• Focusing on what you can control, not the outcome

Click here to find the full show notes and transcript for this episode.

RESOURCES:

• Learn more about Jen’s mindset coaching and sign up for her newsletter: JenniferDiaz.com
• Follow Jen on Insta: @JenMDiaz

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DISCLAIMER

Produced by NOVA Media

Jen Diaz:

Figuring out what do you love about what you do, what makes you passionate about it, what's your why that's bigger than you, and how can you lean into enjoying the process of it. Not just the outcomes. You have to enjoy the actions you're taking or you're going to be miserable and you might as well do something else that's way less pressure.

Sam Vander Wielen:

Hey, Jen. Welcome back to On Your Terms.

Jen Diaz:

Hey, Sam. I'm happy to be here.

Sam Vander Wielen:

You are my first repeat guest. And, also, it does not surprise me at all that my first repeat guest is you and I'm very happy about that.

Jen Diaz:

I'm so honored. Any chance I get to chat with you, I'm so excited. So, I'm very honored to be the first repeat.

Sam Vander Wielen:

Yeah. The first repeat, I'm very proud. And so, to give everybody kind of an idea here of what Jen and I are going to be talking about today. So, if you've listened to this podcast or ever read an email of mine, then you probably already know that Jen's my mindset coach because I talk about her constantly and constantly say how much I love her.

But her and I were talking before about how we've been working together now for years and we were like it was cool this promotion - the promotion that I just ran in February - to see the real world, real time application of a lot of things that you and I've been working on for a very long time. And I saw a difference in myself. And then, it was also the first time I had employees and team and all of these things to kind of run and seeing how my own mindset then started to trickle down and sets the tone.

So, you and I decided that we were going to chat today, and hopefully help everybody to understand what are some of these big picture CEO mindset things that you've been working on with me, that some of which are getting better, some I'm still working on, and that we really saw some improvement in this time around.

Jen Diaz:

Yeah. I love this idea because it takes what can often feel intangible. sometimes the mindset where it can feel really intangible. And we think about, you know, when we're diving into inner child or we're looking at shadow work, it's like how does this connect to my business, how do I apply this in life. And so, it's really fun that after you've been doing the work consistently, it just clicks. You kind of see in real life like, "Oh. This is the result. This is the outcome of all of this effort I've been putting in to this one particular area."

And I particularly love especially debriefing after the launch you just had, and I definitely could see a difference. But I'm excited to hear what you noticed within yourself too.

Sam Vander Wielen:

I would say, you know, the first thing that I noticed going into this launch, and I know I had been telling you this for months - and for everybody to remember, the launch that we're talking about happened from about February 8th to February 23rd. And starting next week on the podcast, we're going to have a four part series where I break down this launch. This was about a $300,000 launch in about a week. And it was very big. It had about 3,000 people sign up for the live webinar and then a lot of purchases, all this kind of stuff. So, it went very well - I remember telling you back in, like, November, December, "Jen, this is going to be big. We're going to do this thing and I think it's going to be big." Do you remember?

Jen Diaz:

I do. Yeah. And I love that. Obviously that belief and just the knowledge, and what I find really inspiring about it is that while you knew I know this is going to be big, it wasn't like, "Oh. I hope it's big. It better be big. It needs to be big." There wasn't this fear or this pressure around it. There was so much more excitement and trust, that you can trust your team, you trust the work you've put in, you've been taking action consistently, you've set yourself up really beautifully. So, it was a lot of grounded genuine confidence in that moment.

And so, of course, when you told me that, I have no doubt that it's going to be big, but it's really fun to see that play out months in advance. And then, even facing obstacles in the launch, like it still turned out really incredibly well.

Sam Vander Wielen:

Yeah. I think one of the coolest things at this point in business is I kind of understand what levers to pull to make certain things happen. And so, I get a good feeling for like when we were planning and designing this launch - which by the way, in next week's episode in part one of the launch series, everyone's going to hear about exactly how I planned it and how we sat down and reverse engineered it and what the strategy was for it - in doing that, you start to get a good feel for this one's going to work. Because I also understand what makes these launches work really well, and that's what I'm excited to dive into in the series.

But I feel like a lot of the work you and I have done though, too, is around this idea that, well, on the one hand, I was very excited about it. And I think that kind of enthusiasm and momentum really helps. I don't also tie, or at least I don't feel like I tie myself as much to it at the same time anymore. Whereas, when we started working together, I think my emotions were maybe more controlled by how well or not well things were going.

Jen Diaz:

Yes. That was one area of change that I noticed. I remember when we first started working together, you'd had a lot of success already and yet there was still fear, there was still the sense of scarcity. I remember you saying like it could all go away and the rug could be pulled out from under me. And while, yeah, sure, there's always the risk of that. It's different when you're living in fear of that and you're using that fear to motivate you to act.

And just the difference in the way that you are approaching the launch that would so much more, what I would say, open handed in this one. Whereas before, I could sense constriction and just a lot more fear, and not necessarily maybe your worth in it, but just a lot of pressure on yourself that's not actually helpful.

Sam Vander Wielen:

I think, I would love your insights on what happened to make it so that launches actually became really fun. And, no, it's not because they've always been really successful. Because I've actually had some along the last couple of years that, I will be honest about the fact, they're always "successful" on paper. They're profitable. They work. But some have not gone as I hoped or not gone as planned or we had major things hop off.

But there's something about going into these launches and actually having fun. Lindsay, my director of operations, was just saying the other day she's done so many launches and did so many before she came to my company.

And she was like, but there's just something about the way we do it that's fun and it's not a lot of stress. And that has to help, right, I would think?

Jen Diaz:

Yes, it does. I think sometimes we get addicted to stress as a way to motivate ourselves. And it can be effective, but it doesn't allow us to enjoy it. And so, that's something that is a pattern that we have to unlearn a lot of times. We pick things up when we're really young, and so I think really for you, there's a lot of things at play with being able to not only take that pressure off of yourself, but also lead your team in a way that wasn't pressurized. And that is, you know, really, leaning into, first off, the idea that you're safe. And even if the worst case scenario happened, you have so many strengths, tools that no one can take away from you that would allow you to rebuild. So, really, you shift where you find your confidence from your outcomes and more into what you innately have and what you can cultivate.

And so, that was one thing, I think, we worked on a lot was not just focusing on the results that, "Hey, you have so much proof that you're successful and that you can trust that," but you have so many skills that have led to that success, that despite the outcome, you can rely on those no matter what.

Sam Vander Wielen:

I think people accidentally think it's about having this confidence that it's going to work out. Even what I was saying when I started like, I think this is going to be really big. It wasn't even this confidence of everything I do touches to gold. It's not this kind of cockiness. Actually, to me at least, it feels like the confidence that I feel like I have now versus especially when we started working together is that I have the confidence that I will figure things out. Not necessarily that everything will work out - well, it will work out because I'll figure it out, but not necessarily everything will go smoothly from the start. You know what I mean?

Jen Diaz:

I mean, what we're talking about there is growth mindset, genuinely. It's this idea that you have a healthy sense of detachment from your outcomes. Yes, you care about them, but they are not your sole focus. They are not connected to your worth. But you're detached from things that you can't control totally. And you're looking at the process, you're looking at what can I learn.

And I remember one thing you told me when we started working together was that you highly value curiosity. And so, utilizing that value and making sure it is weaved into everything you do, which is huge, and it actually takes vulnerability to be curious. Whereas, if we were thinking about I've already built all this, I'm amazing, everything I touch turns to gold, in my mind that would be maybe surface level egoic confidence that is rather shallow and it's not long lasting often, because as you try things, you are going to fail.

And so, that's okay when you can come at it from a genuine sense of I trust myself to figure it out, I'm really curious about how this is going to work, and I want to look at all the data, I want to see what I can do. You take a really innovative approach. And I think that that's where you find a lot of fulfillment in and a lot of joy in, and that's what helps you succeed over and over again because I don't think you're really afraid to fail at this point.

Sam Vander Wielen:

I feel more comfortable that I would figure it out. I wouldn't fail because I would figure it out in the sense, like not something I wouldn't do. Like I have no doubt that I will have a promo that's a "failure" or won't go up to my expectations or something. It happens. And there's so many factors that are outside of our control too.

You and I've talked about this many times, but I feel so passionately, too, about I think people have been sold a bag of goods in online business that they're supposed to be super, super passionate about what they do necessarily. And I always say, I'm very open and honest about the fact that I'm like, "Do you think I love legal templates? Like who does? I would love to meet that person. They'd probably be dry as a bone." But I'm like, who loves legal? They're like, "Yes. What I've dreamt about my whole life is drafting a legal template." No.

I love the fact, as you know, and first of all, I have this addiction to being helpful, so this part of it is that my business feeds this in a way, but it's the fact that legal is so overly complicated and expensive and onerous to so many people. And then, it just so happens to be my secret sauce that I can break things down in a very simple way, which makes me feel very helpful, which is my core being of what I need or what I think I need, as Jen knows. And then, I get to go see people go out and start their own businesses.

We joke about being a business doula, but I love being that little part of what helps people to birth that. That's what I like. And then, I really like the pieces of my actual business. I really love what I get to do. Not the legal. I love marketing. I love doing what we're doing right now. I think that's so important for people, right?

Jen Diaz:

I do too. And I think that you approach it - we talked about this yesterday when you were talking about what's the mechanism - you're so interested in how things work, how to make them work, how to figure things out. And that's such a strength that I think a lot of entrepreneurs have to have if they want to not just last and have long term success, but also enjoy it, because it's always changing. And I think you really shine in that.

I really want you to speak on this, too, about this idea of enjoying the process and having fun learning and almost being a beginner at things because that's one area. I remember when I started my business, I knew how to do my job and I loved it. I had no idea how to run a business. I had no idea how to market. I'm still learning all of that and I've had to learn to love it. I've had to learn to enjoy it. So, I know it's a very teachable skill to learn how to love it. But I would really love to hear you speak on where your love for the business building came from and how you might encourage someone to cultivate that within themselves.

Sam Vander Wielen:

Well, in third grade, I entered an entrepreneurship competition. This is a true story. But you're going to die when you hear about what I entered for my business. It's the best part because it's so me, but also so baby entrepreneur.

So, in third grade, Mr. Whitehead, who was the parent of one of the kids in my class, Tom Whitehead, he was a businessman and he came in and he helped the school run this entrepreneurship competition. And I was like, "This is it. This is going to be my big ticket." So, I created Sammy's Pizza, which was a pizza shop.

Jen Diaz:

I am not shocked.

Sam Vander Wielen:

News to no one. It was so funny. I love also that I thought this was an ingenious idea. I grew up in New Jersey and there's a pizza shop, like every other store is a pizza place. So, I was dying laughing. Anyway, it just was so funny, I remember having to sit down with Mr. Whitehead and plan out what was the cost of my flour, and how was I going to hire employees, and how was I going to rent and lease equipment to build out the kitchen. And I was obsessed with it. And then, I started thinking about how are we going to market this pizza place. I created a coupon system. This whole thing, I was obsessed, obsessed.

I mean, I think for some people you were kind of like meant to be an entrepreneur and it happens. But I also don't think that that's the only kind of people that can run their own businesses. But I see such a beautiful invitation, though, when you start an online business to really focus on what it is about whatever you're doing that you want to do.

So, for example, if you're somebody who really loves podcasting, because what we're doing right now, this sounds so fun to you, why are you squeezing yourself onto YouTube if that doesn't work for you? Or why are you squeezing yourself into blog writing and you're like "I hate writing. I'm not a good writer"? Maybe it's not your thing. Why don't you let yourself shine a little bit, wherever that feels fun to you.

I didn't do any of these things when I started my business. I didn't ever have a podcast or know what that was. I never written a blog post. I built out my first website. I did all of that stuff and that all just so happened to sound very fun to me. But maybe there's one part of that that does. And I think what I often see is I see people trying to squeeze themselves into places in their business that it doesn't feel right to them. And so, maybe there's, I don't know, some natural what sounds fun to you.

Because I really strongly believe in whatever sounds fun - you and I talked about this, this is the same as exercise. Like if some form of exercise sounds fun, you're going to do it more consistently and have more fun and have better results because of it versus forcing yourself to go to CrossFit when you hate CrossFit or something like that. I think it's the same with business. And so, that's what's made it very fun to me, it's kind of following my nose, like following the scent of where it was very attractive to me, and then dropping things, too, when I was like, "It's not for me."

I know that's the "right thing to do". I know it would bring me a lot more leads or this would be successful. But it's just not that fun to me and all this other stuff is.

Jen Diaz:

Yeah. It's not worth it. Well, in that, I'm hearing there's a decent amount of self-knowledge, like you know yourself, you know what you like. There's a lot of self-trust with I'm going to go with my gut. I enjoy this. I'm going to see it through. And I would even say, I think a little bit, for you, an identity piece. I think about your exercise example that when you find something you enjoy and you identify as someone who does this and enjoys it, that is the goal. That's when you really get somewhere with taking action.

And that's a lot of what the work that I do, is, figuring out who you are, what you love, trusting yourself, and then really leaning into identifying as the type of person who figures it out, the type of person who is unstoppable in a way, that you have what it takes. And I think you naturally have some of that already. And there's a lot of people who need to learn how to do that, that it's going to make or break their success in business.

Sam Vander Wielen:

Do you think people can build this like a muscle?

Jen Diaz:

Absolutely. Yeah, absolutely. Our identities are not fixed. And I'm a huge, obviously, believer of continuously getting to know yourself. And that's something that, I think, is really fun when you talk about your experience when you were in third grade. Oh, my gosh. Mr. Whitehead? How thorough?

Sam Vander Wielen:

You need to look him up. I think I'll send him my P&L and be like, "You'd be so proud."

Jen Diaz:

Look at that class. Have you reached out to him? You should let him know. That's amazing.

Sam Vander Wielen:

He'd be like, "This girl. This girl and her pizza shop."

Jen Diaz:

It's incredible. Because I'm on the other end of that. I never thought about entrepreneurship. That was not my plan. I fell into it. And so, I've had to learn. For me, it's been a learned thing to identify as it. And I think one thing that I see a lot of people struggle with is this idea of I have to be right. I have to get it right. I have to know what I need to do. They confuse clarity with having the perfect action plan. And that is not often realistic. And so, that's one thing that some people I do think naturally gravitate towards that more than others. But I do think it can be learned for sure.

Sam Vander Wielen:

It seems like being open to that opportunity. I mean, you and I were talking about this yesterday, actually. Even coming into online business, part of, I think, our joint concern is that there are some people out there who are marketing this as being something very easy and automatic and guaranteed. And so then, that sometimes attracts people who don't realize it's a lot. It's still a lot of work.

And that's why I always say that as much as I'm talking about how much fun I have, please don't get it twisted that things don't go wrong and there aren't days when I want to like throw my computer out the window. All that stuff still exists. It's just that overall, I like it so much that it's worth it. It's worth putting up with all that stuff in order to go through it. And so, I wanted you to speak about this, because I think it is hard for some people come into this being like, "Oh, shoot. This is a lot different than I thought."

Jen Diaz:

It is. And it's almost not their fault. And I think that we both share a similar frustration, maybe. And I don't know if it's as marketed as much today as like "Oh, it's easy. All you have to do is share this, do that, say this, and clients will flood in or customers will flood in, and you can be traveling the world and not having to work that much."

I think that it's done a big disservice and it's pros and cons. I think that it could be very expansive of like, "Oh, my gosh. I did not know it was possible to do this." And a massive disservice of like, "They're not showing you how much work it really does take." And that's where we have to figure out what's worth it to me. And what do I love about this? What's my purpose in this? What's my vision for this that's bigger than myself? Because you're going to need to rely on that when things do get hard. And you're going to need to know who you are so that you can push through those times.

And that's why I think finding the sweet spot between hustle culture and soft life or feminine where you're just like it's laid back. We need both. And we just need to find a healthy middle ground and learn how to ebb and flow based on where we are. And I think that's something that people would do really well to learn about themselves and experience. But figuring out what do you love about what you do? What makes you passionate about it?

What's your why that's bigger than you? And how can you lean into enjoying the process of it? Not just the outcomes. You have to enjoy the actions you're taking or you're going to be miserable and you might as well do something else that's way less pressure.

Sam Vander Wielen:

Yeah, absolutely. One thing I keep finding myself writing about a lot in the book is that if you're not experiencing the success or the results in your business right now, among many reasons that we discussed throughout the book, but one of the reasons might be this idea of feeling like you have to love the actual art or work of what you do versus having a really good business idea, too, and just being like, "What's actually just a good business idea? And this is smart and I can see how this can work." And then, you could be more somebody like me maybe, who's like, "Hey, I love what this job allows me to do. I love my tasks day-to-day, but I don't have to be so passionate about it. It's not my life's work to do a legal template."

Jen Diaz:

No. And it doesn't have to be for you to enjoy it either. I think, what fulfills people is finding skills they're really good at, utilizing them, and being appreciated and compensated for them. So, I think that as long as your work can meet that criteria, you're going to be happy, happier at least, more fulfilled.

And I mean, I love what I do. I feel deeply connected to the work that I do, to the clients I do. And I would be lying if I said there weren't days where I think, "Oh, my gosh. What am I doing? Why am I doing this? I don't have that energy for it." But they're not many like that, but they're like that. And, thankfully, I know well enough to not question my entire existence or feel like I need to completely pivot.

We're going to have off days. We're human. And you're not always going to be passionate about your work. You're not going to always be passionate about the tasks you have to do. And that's okay because, ultimately, hopefully, your goal, what you really want out of it is stronger than the frustration.

Sam Vander Wielen:

Yeah, absolutely. And I feel like you're a very good example, too, of somebody who takes something you're passionate about. So, in case you don't know already, Jen is an incredible writer. She writes beautifully and has an incredible newsletter, which you should definitely get, and so I'll make sure I link it down below, but I love it. And that's actually how I became a client of yours. Actually, I read your weekly newsletter and I loved it. And literally everybody says about every good newsletter or every good piece of content, I was like, "If this is what her newsletters are like, then what is it like to work with her?" Because I felt transformed from her newsletters.

But you're an incredible writer. And I know you also like to write personally about things that have nothing to do with business too. But I think you're a good example of somebody who's taken something that, first of all, you're naturally very good at and I know you work at it. But you have natural talent, let's just put it that way. So, you have some raw talent and then I know you work at it. But, also, you integrate that really beautifully into your business and then I feel like that's what connects so well with others. Let's say in a different world, you didn't love coaching so much, but you're taking something that you do love and you're integrating it into your business.

Jen Diaz:

And I think that's a really good example. I love to write. And sometimes the way that I actually love to write is very different than I have learned I need to write in my business. The two do cross over at times, which is fun, because storytelling can be a little bit more creative, and I love that. And I understand that there's copywriting strategies that are effective, and so I want to use those too. So, it's a really good exercise for me.

But I also really love learning how to write poetry. That, I am not good at and it will probably never see the light of day, which is totally fine by me. But it's a nice example of I can have passions outside of my work. In fact, I highly recommend you find them outside of your work. And I'm a part of a poetry membership and love learning about it, love trying it. So, it's a really beautiful practice for me.

I also really love photography. And there was a point where I was like, I should make a business out of this like most entrepreneurs do. And then, I did a few things that I got paid for. And I was like, "I actually don't like getting paid for this. I just want to do what I want to do, how I want to do it." And that's it.

And so, letting myself have these things outside of work that maybe can weave in occasionally, but don't have to at all. And I can find a lot of fulfillment and creative expression without needing other's validation.

And for you, too, I love that story about the pizza because I know you love to cook. I know you're really passionate about food. And so, it's fun that you indulge in that and find a lot of joy and fulfillment in that and meaning in that, but it's not your business.

And so, I think that oftentimes anytime we try to get everything from one aspect of our life or one person in our life, we are going to be sorely let down. And it's not our job's job to fulfill every single need we have. We're so complex and dynamic. We have a lot of very important needs and they're worth pursuing outside of work as much as you can. I understand there are different seasons to be able to do that. But, yeah, I think that you don't have to love your job and you can still or at least be super, super passionate about every aspect of it. And you can be very successful and very fulfilled by it still.

Sam Vander Wielen:

I think that is so true. Not expecting your business to do all these things, it's a lot of pressure to put on the business. Just like it would be to put on your partner. It's like you're supposed to be all these things for me and provide me happiness and provide me fulfillment and provide me all these things. That's too much pressure for one thing.

And I think you're right, I can see how in our work together over the years, too, of not finding that fulfillment in the business or not only finding my fulfillment in the business, and that not being my only identity, not putting too much of myself into it, and then diversifying myself outside of what I do - at least for me. I don't know if you would recommend this to other people or if this is universally helpful to other people - even having some other things that I did outside of business that I didn't share either - they just kept kind of private. And I always recommend to people and what I write about in the book is that there's one or two little kind of personal aspects of your personality. Like I love to cook. I'll always be taking pictures of everything I'm eating and cooking. I love doing that. And then, I also know that my audience now really loves that, too, and it's kind of built up this other little foodie thing, and I love that. So, that is fine. I'm fine with that. But I don't share every single part of my life - I found that very helpful with separating from it in a healthy way.

Jen Diaz:

I think so. I mean, it's boundaries, right? It's recognizing. And I feel the same with my own life. I think about I want people to know who I am and to connect with me on similar things that we enjoy. And so, it's fun to share those things. But then, there are parts of my life that I'm like, "You know what? That's sacred." And I don't want to share that and I don't have to share that. And I can honor that boundary.

I think that's really helpful, too, because I know for me, I feel like when I'm sharing something, it takes me out of the moment sometimes, it takes me out of the actual experience of it. And I desperately want to fully experience my life. And so, that's where, I think, as we can separate our full identity from our job, it helps because I'm not in work mode so why should I share all of this? Because this is not for work. It's for me, my family. It's for personal things. So, I think that that creates a healthy barrier to where we might not be so tempted to slip into I am what I do.

Sam Vander Wielen:

Yeah, absolutely. Funny enough, you and I worked more on separating from social media, taking more breaks, not working so much, taking more time off social media before this promotion that I just did, and then it was the largest ever, so I find that kind of interesting. What are your insights on that?

Jen Diaz:

I was going to say something about that. I love how a lot of our work has been not over identifying with your work and finding things outside of it to enjoy and actually stepping away. And I think that there are a few things in that because I love that you've done that and you've still grown and you've still seen success. You just had your biggest launch after a season where you have stepped away maybe more than ever before.

And I think that there are a few things at play. I think number one, when you diversify your life, your experience, you actually tap into so much more creativity, you become so much more innovative. It's like giving it room to breathe. You step out of it. It changes your perspective. It opens up different parts of your brain. So, it actually makes you a smarter, more effective business owner and leader. And so, I think that's part of it.

I think it allows you to genuinely rest, and not just physically, but the mental, always thinking about it. I need to post that. I've got to show up. I've got to knock that out. I have to get this to this person. It kind of quiets that so you can have some genuine stillness, and genuine rest, and recuperation. And that, I think is really important, especially in terms of avoiding burnout, getting really sick of what you do, and having kind of quarter life crisis of identity. And so, I think that those two things really help.

And I'm speaking from what I've seen from you, is it helped you zero in on actual tasks that you need to be doing that no one else can do, and took you out of the menial tasks that you could do technically, but didn't need to. And so, it strengthened your ability to delegate and trust your team and have faith that you are supported in your growth and your business and your journey.

Sam Vander Wielen:

I think if anybody currently has kind of more of a rollercoaster-y relationship, especially with social media that I used to have where it would go really hard, and post all the time, do all this stuff. And then, you'd be like, "Oh, my gosh. I can't post anything" or "I have no ideas left" or "I'm just so sick of this app. I don't want to be here anymore" or consuming too much content, not really creating something. And then, I would go back into a promo and do it again and then be like, "Oh. I can't do this anymore."

Now, I feel like I'm more of what I would describe as an ocean kayaking relationship with social media.

Jen Diaz:

We need you to explain that.

Sam Vander Wielen:

Okay. If anyone's never been ocean kayaking, this became my mom's thing several years ago, she was like, "Sammy, we're getting ocean kayaks." So, then she went out and bought us all ocean kayaks and it was absolutely hysterical. It's a story for a different day. She got my very prissy cousin to get in this ocean kayak and we all told her she was not going to touch the water. And, boom, she flipped over. Within two seconds, boom, in the water. It was so funny, we talk about it all the time.

But with an ocean kayak, you have to hit the wave head on with the nose of the kayak. And if you do not hit the wave with the nose of the kayak head on, you will flip because it's gravity, or whatever, I don't know, whatever physics element. Gravity makes sense to me.

Jen Diaz:

Something. It's a wave.

Sam Vander Wielen:

Something about it makes sense. So, you really have to keep it. But anyway, then you kind of have a nice little bloop right over the wave, and then you're bobbing along until the next wave comes. And it's more of a little wave versus these huge, big rollercoaster crashes. And I feel like that's what's allowed me - you and I have been talking a lot lately about we use wave analogies a lot - this idea of kind of pulling back the wave. Because when waves are pulling back, they're gathering up energy. So, they're pulling up the energy from the ocean floor, and then when the wave is coming in, it is gathering all that energy and that's what's making it crash. It's being a crest and crash. And so, getting more into that mode of I don't have to be so high and low. I take every weekend off social media. I've just created more of that ebb and flow.

Jen Diaz:

I would love to know for you, because I know there's a fear often when there is an ebb. I hope that's when the wave recedes. When you're pulling back, there's often this fear of what if another wave doesn't come? What if it all falls apart? What if I lose everything? What if I lose momentum? And I think that's such a big fear, especially in the online world. And so, I'd love for you to share how you overcame that fear or maybe continually work through that fear when it is ebbing, when the tides kind of going back for you and you are taking time off, and maybe not seeing the results that you would on a normal basis, how do you move through that and trust that another one does come? Because it does. It always does.

Sam Vander Wielen:

I feel like there's a mindset piece and then a strategy piece that's helped. Because the mindset piece that you've helped me with is that when I think about that, "Oh. If I don't keep posting, then everyone's going to know I'm gone or everything's going to go away," or something like this, I kind of now have you in my head all the time, which is both a pro and a con to working with Jen. I'm always like, "Oh, man. I know what Jen would tell me now, so now I can't get away with it." So, I always have her in the back of my mind. She's like the mama bird on your shoulder telling you no, no.

So, I feel like I couldn't hear you in my mind being like, first of all - you would never say it like this - don't think you're so important in the sense that everyone's not waiting around for me to be "What's Sam going to post today?" There is a lot of story, I think, that we built up around this, like, "If I don't post today, then everyone's going to know. If I take a week off, everyone's going to miss me and then the whole business is going to go out." It's a lot of drama that we create around it. And so, part of it's just been very humbling to be like, "Nobody cares."

Also, I have so much content. I've created so many things. And I have all these other things. And maybe my people are feeling overwhelmed. Like, when I was doing two podcasts episodes a week and two emails a week and all these things, it feels like a lot for me, maybe it's feeling like a lot for them.

So, not like, "Oh, they're all going to miss me." It's like, "Actually, maybe they'll actually be able to consume and enjoy the content I do create if I slow down a little bit and they'll appreciate it too." That's also where serving comes in really handy, by the way, ask, ask about how people feel.

I would say that's kind of my mindset piece around it, trusting that I know that I always come back and things work out. But I'll just know it's not that serious for, like, a week, month, whatever it is.

Jen Diaz:

Right. It's not that dire. Yeah.

Sam Vander Wielen:

No, it's not that dire. Go ahead.

Jen Diaz:

The piece, too, it's so funny because I would never say you're not important. You are so important. And none of us are to a degree.

Sam Vander Wielen:

No, you never would. That's kind of what I mean. I'm kind of like, it's kind of funny when you say it out loud.

Jen Diaz:

No one is thinking about you.

Sam Vander Wielen:

It's like when people go on Instagram and are like, "Did everybody miss me? Sorry. I ghosted you guys for a week." I was like, "You were gone? Where did you go?"

Jen Diaz:

Well, I think that's why as humans, we love - I guess I shouldn't speak for every single human in the world, but I know for me.

Sam Vander Wielen:

On behalf of all humans.

Jen Diaz:

On behalf of humanity, I would love to just state that we all love this. I know I love being in nature surrounded by something that awes me. Like the ocean, it's so huge. Going to a mountain range and hiking, and the mountains are just massive and it's just like a reminder that we're so small, and not unimportant. And it's not that you don't matter, but the fears that you have like everyone is watching and going to think I'm X, Y, Z. No, they're not. That's coming from within you, actually. That's your own inner fears and projections that you're putting on other people, which is worth diving into and uncovering that within yourself to give yourself a little bit more freedom. But we do kind of love that reminder that we're so small and it's okay.

Sam Vander Wielen:

I actually find it very refreshing. And this is why you all need to work with Jen because she can put it way better than I can, because I'm like, "That's what I have in my head. That's what I mean." When they say that Jen would never tell me I'm not actually important, I just mean in general, it takes the heat off of things. I don't know.

The first time I ever left the country, I was 16. I went to China by myself and I went there to play volleyball. And I remember they took us to the Great Wall of China. And that was the first time that I, in my cognitive memory, remember feeling exactly what you're describing in this almost like laughable, happy-cry moment on the Great Wall of China, looking out into however many miles you could see out into the distance, you could see the wall rumbling into the mountains. It was gorgeous. And I just remember feeling a tiniest speck on earth in the best way possible.

And that's kind of what I mean in this sense of bringing some of that feeling of just being like, this stuff doesn't matter, I need to take care of myself.

I just wrote an email about this. It's going to go out. Actually, you guys have already gotten this. We're talking in the future. I just wrote an email and it's going out on March 26th. It's about taking some of this pressure off to focus on some of the bigger picture, which you alluded to earlier of, I think that was really helpful this year in backing out a little bit to be like, "Let me focus on some bigger picture stuff." And it doesn't matter so much about posting here, there, and everywhere.

Jen Diaz:

I think it's interesting to me to think about how it can feel so relieving to feel small. And I wonder if it's because in those moments we do feel much smaller, more insignificant, but more deeply connected to something bigger than ourselves, whether it's just other people experiencing something similar or the earth or higher being, whatever. But I wonder if it does that, because I think about the other side of that, when we feel all important, it is really disconnecting from others. It's very egoic. And I don't mean that in a harsh way. But it's very it's all about me, which is what our ego does and is necessary sometimes. But when we get caught up in that, it doesn't allow us to deeply connect. And so, I wonder if that's the difference there why it feels so refreshing.

Sam Vander Wielen:

Yeah, I could imagine. Not to take this in a different direction, but I was actually thinking of this yesterday as it relates to the launch that we just had in terms of, I think, maybe in the past I had more of this attitude and there was more of this ego of "Why aren't these people buying? I'm giving and they're not performing for me" or "I'm posting this thing and people aren't responding. Why isn't this working for me?" And there was more of an indignancy. Whereas, I don't feel that now and I definitely have more of that experimenter scientist mindset of just being like, "Maybe because it was a piece of crap piece of content," I don't know, or the algorithm just didn't show it to anybody. There are all kinds of reasons. It's not about me so much anymore. Yeah, I thought you'd have insights on this.

Jen Diaz:

Well, I think that's such a freeing thing, too, is to be able to take feedback without crumbling. I think that's helpful. I was just talking about this with another client, talking about when someone's giving you feedback, that's gold. You can use that to improve upon and that's how you reach success. And so, really, looking at what's working, what's not, and the data points of it, it's really helpful to take you out of it, to be like it's rarely ever personal. No one is trying to personally offend you. Some maybe, you know, every now and then, but that's part of it. But I think that it's not personal.

It's really about what the data say. What's it tell you? How can you make it better? Because that mindset of a scientist that you're talking about, that growth mindset of I can improve, I can grow, I don't know everything and I'm excited to continue learning, which I think can be really helpful when you're applying different strategies. And I know you're going to mention the strategy that helped you kind of overcome maybe the fears and the ebbs and prepped you for another wave, and I'd love to hear that because that is a necessary part too.

So, this is all the balance of some would say the masculine energy and feminine energy of, emotionally, I'm taken care of. I'm nurturing myself.

And then, I'm also being strategic. I'm planning ahead. I have strong boundaries with that and protecting these things. And so, I'd love to hear that piece for you of what was that strategy that helped you overcome that fear that really gave you action steps?

Sam Vander Wielen:

I mean, it's more related to mindset than I initially realized. But I feel like the strategy that I talk about here often, which is focusing on evergreen content that's searchable, findable in other places, it has really helped me to adopt that relaxed mindset because I feel a lot of times I can sit back in the confidence and the comfort that I know that the things I've created are already out there working for me. So, maybe it's the cook in me, but I always think of it like marination. If you ever liked to marinate meat or chicken or whatever, it's like you've done the work. Now it's in the fridge, it's marinating. There's nothing else you can do. It's working its little magic in there and tenderizing the meat and doing all the things. And you're out, you know, you can do whatever you need to do. That's kind of how I think about this.

So, I've created - I don't know at this point - 200 something podcast episodes. I've worked tirelessly to title them in a way, to write show notes in a way, to optimize those show notes, to have our blog posts, to have all these things, I have YouTube videos, all this stuff that I know is out there working for me. So, it's like at some point, what's going to be enough? I don't know, it's kind of like depositing money into your money market account or something like this. It's like you put it in and then it grows, so that's the whole point, you sit back. So, if you're not taking advantage of that, what's the point?

Jen Diaz:

Well, and that's the beauty of long term investment. And that's exactly what evergreen content is. And what is often, I think, in this day and age, really challenging to focus on because you don't get - and I know you're really experiencing this right now, not to call you out.

Sam Vander Wielen:

Yeah. We were talking about this yesterday.

Jen Diaz:

You don't get immediate validation. You don't know if it's working immediately when you're doing a YouTube video or when you're creating a podcast episode. It's not like you're putting something on Instagram. You created it in an hour, it's done and dusted, and you're going to see how people respond to it. You don't get that immediacy.

And so, I'm curious for you because you've started out thinking long term, which is really smart. But thinking about SEO and how can this work for me in the future? How can I plan long term, set myself up for success long term, knowing that I might not see immediate gratification and rewards, but trust the process that it's going to get better? That's a big, big piece that a lot of people, I think, are missing. And as social media changes and evolves, as it always does, I think it's more important now more than ever, and more challenging now to make ourselves focus on that.

So, I'm curious, your thoughts, because you do, you have a ton of content. You are unique in how much you can create and produce and put out. And so, I love what you said earlier about finding something you enjoy doing and sticking with that. But, yeah, I think that focusing on the long term and having your sight set there is critical to navigating. And it's a long term thing, so I'm curious for you mindset-wise what helps you focus on that when you're not getting immediate rewards, especially as you're writing a book right now?

Sam Vander Wielen:

I know. I was just telling Jen yesterday like, "Man, I'm writing the book. I'm not on social media right now, so I'm not seeing anything." It's still being posted, but I don't get that little dopamine hit to see what's happening. I feel like I'm in a detox. It's really interesting. But it's really tough.

You know, I had a friend tell me years ago when I was questioning my strategy. My idea, as I've mentioned here before, is that, essentially, with something more like SEO, with being on YouTube where you can search for or someone can find you, my idea there is just as simple as people are literally looking for you, so why not just position yourself in front of it? Like someone's typing into Google or whatever what they're looking for, why not put yourself there? That seems like a no-brainer to me.

Jen Diaz:

That's such a belief too. People are looking for you.

Sam Vander Wielen:

Yeah, I guess that's true.

Jen Diaz:

And that's one that I see other entrepreneurs struggle with, like who's going to want my services? That's often like an unconscious or sometimes very conscious thought, like Who's going to want to work with me? There are so many other people out there. And so, having that belief that there's someone out there searching for you, you have to put yourself in position for them to find you, I love that.

Sam Vander Wielen:

And I think maybe it's like the judgmental, harsh Scorpio in me, but I remember going and seeing that there were other people offering things and then being like, "I could do this different. I can do this better." Not even in a cocky way, literally, of seeing an opportunity that there was something missing.

And this is what I spent a lot of time writing in the book, is, really taking the time to do the research, whether it's about a product that you want to create or about an entire business you want to create, but taking that time to be like, What is already there? Is there demand already for this? Is there proof of concept? Is there supply? Meaning, there are other people doing what you're doing. Don't take that as a deterrent. That is actually proof that this thing works, but what is missing? And where are you different and unique? And then, just hone in on that, go in and be different.

Jen Diaz:

And everything you just said, those questions, that point of view with business is so teachable. And people, I would say, take notes on that and follow that, apply that to everything that you're doing and looking to build. Because it's so true, it's just about how can I make this work.

There's this underlying belief that I can do that. If they can do that, I can do that, too. I love that. That level of comparison can be healthy, can be helpful at times.

And I'm really curious for you because I know when you started your first business, it "failed." And then, you came into this one, and I would love to hear you speak on how you mentally, emotionally overcame that failure or moved through that failure and shifted in a way that was really, really brilliant and led you to where you are today.

Sam Vander Wielen:

It's funny because one part of why I think I was able to turn that failed experience into a very successful one pretty quickly with the legal business is probably something that doesn't come from a great, great place and something that you and I have talked about a lot before, which is this feeling like I have to have my back up against a wall in order to really perform. Even though it was not actually true, had I been working with Jen at the time, I would have known that this was a story and I was perfectly safe and I was fine, but I felt like it was do or die for me. And I thought that when I left the law, that was it. I had bet on my one pivot.

And so, my pivot was starting a health coaching business. That didn't work. I was like, "Oh, shit. I need to make this work." Not only is it making me look bad, but I was terrified about money. I remember I had nothing left in my health coaching business account. And so, I took, like, $100. I put that into my Sam Vander Wielen LLC account and started a bank account with that $100. That's all I had. And I was like, I'm going to have to make it work. And I don't recommend this for anyone, but I thrive or have thriven, I've thriven in the past.

Jen Diaz:

Sam Vander Wielen:

I know. It was like [inaudible].

Jen Diaz:

I have thriven.

Sam Vander Wielen:

I have thriven in the pasteth before I worked with Jeneth.

Jen Diaz:

King James Version.

Sam Vander Wielen:

Yes, exactly. I know. I've thriven in the past in that position. I no longer operate in that way. But I did at that time. And like what you and I've been talking about in this episode, the health coaching thing gave me the opportunity to see all these little pieces. Like I said, I literally wouldn't have known what is an email list, what's an email blast, as people used to call it. I didn't know any of this stuff. And so, when my eyes were a little bit awoken to these things, it was like, wait a minute, I really like this. So, now I want to like take this and go apply it over here, which I think is a really good business idea. And I applied everything that I'm writing about in the book. But I very much was operating from that place of hunger.

Jen Diaz:

And I would challenge your thriveth.

Sam Vander Wielen:

Yes, my thriving. My thriving nature.

Jen Diaz:

You know, and I've seen a lot of people actually create culturally successful things as a response to trauma, stress, scarcity. And the trouble is the effect that that has on our nervous systems over time. And so, while on one hand, you really can trust that you're going to take care of yourself when your back is against the wall, because you did, and so you can absolutely trust yourself in that, and that would give me a lot of confidence and courage. It doesn't have to be that way. It doesn't have to be built that way. You can work hard without feeling like my back's against the wall. It's do or die having that extra pressure on yourself. And I know that's something that we've worked with a lot because you got to a place and you're like I don't want this to be my existence.

And sometimes we don't always make the healthiest choices as a result of that. I'm not saying that you haven't. But I think that's worth noting and saying. For you, I think it's brave to look at what you've built and how you've built it and to kind of say I'm really grateful for that version of me. I really can trust that if I need her, she can still show up. And I want to maintain this and continue to grow this in a new way. That takes a lot of courage to shift that, which you have been doing really boldly. And I'm excited to see you continue to do that so that you feel how you want to feel and can see that growth and abundance and success can still happen even when your back is maybe on a cushier surface.

Sam Vander Wielen:

Yeah, exactly.

Jen Diaz:

You've got plenty of space.

Sam Vander Wielen:

Yeah, exactly. I'm definitely more trusting now that things will be okay, things will work out. I also think I've readjusted. I feel like this is not a popular opinion in our space, but especially when we started our businesses, there was just so much noise around making 80,000 figures a minute and all of this stuff.

Jen Diaz:

Twenty-four figure months.

Sam Vander Wielen:

Twenty-four figure months, and buying a G-Wagon, the whole thing. And there was so much bro marketing. And I hope that's calming down. I actually don't really know because I don't consume it anymore. But I feel like it was very popular. And I definitely had also this like reckoning of what is enough? And what's enough for me, I get to define that. Why is it that your business has to keep growing? I mean, if I want it to grow, great. But, also, am I just growing to grow or because I think that's what you have to do? What does that even mean? What does growing mean to me? Does it mean more customers? Does it mean more profitable? Does it mean just more revenue? That I'm lower profit? There's a lot of room for interpretation there. And so, really stepping back and allowing myself to start asking, What does that mean to me? What do I want?

Jen Diaz:

That question, it's that. What do I want? And, also, asking yourself, being bold enough to ask yourself, why do I want what I want. And that's a scary thing because sometimes ambition, it has a shadow side. It's not always going to lead you to more fulfillment, to happiness, to a better life. And you think it might, but it won't if it's not checked. And we want to keep that in check so that we're more aligned with what you actually value, what you genuinely want in your life, what you want to experience. And that, I think is worth asking yourself. It's like, When is it enough? And when are you fulfilled? And how will you know? And why do you want what you want? I love that question.

And to be very honest with it, I know for me in my own life, there are things that I want, but my ego really wants it, my persona really wants it, and I don't want to let go of it. I want to really attach myself to it because it means something to me. And the more I can kind of release my grip and question it and hold it and recognize that isn't me. Especially when we're talking about material things, that's not me. I can't put my soul in that. That's cool if you really genuinely enjoy it and like it, amazing. But don't do it to please others. Don't do it to try to continue to cultivate this ego of what you think you should want or who you should be.

Sam Vander Wielen:

Absolutely. Yeah, that's very true. I think that it'd be really cool for people to hear from you, like you've been through a lot of launches with a lot of different people with different businesses, and different desires and values, and hopes, and dreams, and sized businesses, and all that kind of stuff, what are some common themes you've seen? Not necessarily what are the three things that make the launch most successful, but in the mindsets of CEOs who go into things, what are some common themes you see in the most successful CEOs that you work with?

Jen Diaz:

The most successful ones, and I'm going to define success with fulfillment, growth, and maybe not the top outcome but the outcome where they're excited for the next one. What I see in them is they are very excited to learn. They can't wait to get to the other side of it and see what worked, what didn't. They're so excited to try and then look and see what they can learn from the experience. They also think about serving when they're selling. They're thinking about this isn't about me. It's about my customer. It's about my client. It's about my greater mission. And when I can focus on inviting the right people into my offer, into my service, and trust that the right people are going to come in and I can learn how to better speak to them after I look at this, they have such good responses.

The third thing I would say is that their goals are very action based. So, they're looking at, Am I serving really well? I'm looking at growth and what I can learn from this experience so that I know I can just get better and apply it. And then, I'm also just really enjoying the process of this. And I know it's going to be okay with whatever happens. They're not completely attached and so they're very focused on I'm really showing up and taking action. I know that these are my goals. I'm sending X amount of emails. I'm showing up and doing this. I'm going to put on my masterclass this many times. And I'm going to judge my success off of my actions, not my results. We'll look at those at the end of the launch and then assess where things could improve and what went well.

Which is something that you said to me after this really big launch. You were like, "I'm just so excited. It was really fun. It went really well." And honestly, like, I can't wait to do the debrief because I already know there are things we can improve on. And I can't wait to apply that. I can't wait to get better for the next one. That mentality will change everything.

Launches don't have to be miserable if you focus on those three things.

Sam Vander Wielen:

Yeah, absolutely. And pro tip, by the way, if you're doing a promo sometime soon, keep a note somewhere. We use Asana, so I created a note at the start that's like a debrief note. And as the launch is going, I'm literally adding to that note throughout the day, like must do this, stop doing this, let's do this next time, we forgot to do this. Because if you ask me today, I wouldn't remember. But I go back and I look at my list and I'm like, "Oh, yeah. Thank goodness I wrote that down." That really helps.

But it's really helpful to hear - like what I'm taking away from what you're sharing - is that loving the process - well, maybe not even loving it, but being open to the process and really even just seeing it, I think, what's refreshing in hearing what you're saying is seeing this as a process, that this is not something that you start and it's easy, or it's not something you start and you're supposed to be automatically good at, or that you deserve necessarily off the start.

We work for it. We have to earn people's trust. We have to establish ourselves. Work for our audience. We have to make an actually good product that helps people so that more people want to buy it. There's work involved. But I think having that mindset that I'm here for the long haul so I understand that there's going to be a lot of room for improvement and growth and being open to that.

Jen Diaz:

I think that underlying all of those things, the ability to look at that is you have to have this belief that you are ultimately going to succeed long term and you're willing to do what it takes. And not in a hustle culture type way bro marketing, but you're willing to learn, you're willing to look ridiculous, you're willing to try, you're willing to be a beginner. Like knowing my success is inevitable because I trust myself, because I know I can learn, I know I can create a really great product, maybe not out of the gate, that isn't common. So, okay. I don't expect these ridiculous things of myself. I'm not entitled to success, but I trust myself enough to know that I can do the work and I can create it.

And then, focusing on the actions over and over again on what you can control, what you can do, which I know in your launch, you had a huge tech issue.

Sam Vander Wielen:

Yeah. I was going to ask you about that. So, we had it really big. We offered two live webinars. The first live webinar was a complete disaster in terms of the tech. It wasn't working. My screen wasn't working. People couldn't hear me or couldn't see me. It was a whole thing. For the second one, we actually ended up switching platforms using an entirely different platform. So, in the middle of the night, we switched all the links. Thank goodness, by the way, for ConvertKit, you can go back into emails and change links that you've sent out. Thank goodness because we redirected people automatically. But that impacted our sales heavily.

And this was something I wanted to talk with you about because it was something that I noticed a big difference in myself, that in the past, when I've had launches that weren't going as well as I thought or you would have a couple of quiet days, I would start coming up with all kinds of stories. Like, "This is it. No one's buying. It's already over." And then, what I would do is stop showing up on social media. I'd kind of pull back at it quiet and then almost self-fulfill exactly what it was laying out for me.

I mean, first of all, the first day of our promo was way quieter than it should have been because of this tech issue. And then, always in the middle of a launch - and I talk about this in the first episode of the series - there's always going to be a period where things get a little quieter, especially if you're doing a fast action and then a closed cart. And for ours, it fell over the weekend, and so I just felt very relaxed over the weekend. I almost felt like I was giving everybody a mutual break. I was kind of like, I know I've been hitting you hard with the promo stuff. I feel tired too. I posted one time on stories each day on Saturday, Sunday, and then I was out. I was like, I'm going to go take the rest of the day, be in nature, be off of this. I know everybody else needs a break too. And then, I'll like get back to it on Monday. And we went hard for like the last three days and everything was more than fine. It was great. So, that was a huge difference this time around.

Jen Diaz:

What do you think helped you go from in the past when you may have stopped showing up and really kind of started telling all those stories to yourself to this time. Really, you handled it. That's my favorite win of yours from that entire launch, honestly, was when you shared this happened and I'm so proud of how I handled it. I want to know what's different about you now versus then.

Sam Vander Wielen:

I wish you all could see it because it was so funny when the first webinar was just going so badly. So, I went to drama camp for ten years as a kid every single summer, and I pulled out all the things I remembered from drama camp. I made my voice more animated and then I would go up and down, and then I would take pauses, all these things I've learned in public speaking because I had to make up for the fact that no one could see anything. It was just so funny. So, there was that whole thing, which was hysterical.

But I think that I've done the whole launch thing where I didn't feel like it was going that great. And I started throwing a pity party/temper tantrum in the middle of it, and then just sunk my own boat. And I've done that many times. I've seen other people do it. And then, I don't know, somewhere along the way, maybe it was I had a promo where I was like, "You know what? I'm going to commit to consistent energy throughout this." And I saw that, yes, I had those quiet days where things slowed and then all of a sudden it picked up. So, I kind of bought into that whole you don't know what's going to happen. You don't know when it's going to pick back up.

I also understand buying behavior more now and can kind of trust in that. People buy when there's this deadline, which is like sales psychology.

And so, there was this deadline and then the deadline got a little longer, so everybody took a break and then everybody bought again right before the deadline. So, I understood how that worked and I just decided ahead of time to mentally commit I'm going to show up every day throughout this promo, regardless of how it's going.

And I'm not trying to promote this mentality, but I once heard a dietitian say that you should decide how you feel about how much you weigh before you ever step on a scale. And I thought that was like a very interesting mindset to not let you stepping on the scale dictate how you feel about your body. And I was kind of I like that in terms of how I think about my business. Like I'm not going to let what's happening day-to-day in the promo dictate how I feel about this promotion and how I show up for it. I've just decided ahead of time I'm showing up like this consistently throughout and that's it.

And then, I would just finally tell people that you also have to get really good at biting onto any little piece of momentum you can. If you get a nice DM or a nice email or one purchase, you have to celebrate every little thing because it starts to feel bigger and bigger to you. And then, I also think that momentum and energy very well translates to other people and impacts your sales.

Jen Diaz:

Absolutely. I love that. You know, you're kind of reverse engineering the storytelling in your mindset of instead of focusing on the negative, which we are wired to do, we have to make a concerted effort to focus on the positive, but really focusing on what is working, what can you control. You're showing up and you're committing to own this launch, own your energy, own how you show up. That's what we can control. We cannot control the tech. We can't control even the results to an extent. So, focus on what you can and that is your job for launching, is, focusing on how you're showing up your energy and being able to be emotionally and mentally resilient when things don't happen.

And you have the benefit of wisdom and knowledge that have helped you learn that, which I do think is so important. And listening to a lot of clients that I have worked with, not all, but some when they first launch, I encourage them, maybe suggest that why don't you wait until the end of the launch to look at all your data, to look at your email opens, and click rates, and stuff like that, because it's the first time you're doing this.

What I don't want you to do is get so roped into no one's signing up yet, no one's signing up yet when you just started this. We need you to show up fully and focus on the people who will sign up or who you're speaking to, who you're continually warming up so that your energy stays high.

Because it's palpable. How you're showing up is always palpable. Communication, I think it's - what is it, 92 percent? - or 7 percent is verbal. The rest is tonality. It's body language. It's energy, essentially. And so, it matters. And so, protecting that in those moments, like what you did, you were very animated and you rolled with that so well. You really tackled that obstacle beautifully.

Sam Vander Wielen:

Well, thanks. The hype is so important, like Jen is saying, that translates so well. And I'm not encouraging anyone to manufacture it, but there are ways to look for it more to really have that mindset of I want this, I want to absorb this, and then like roll with it.

So, for example, when someone would DM me and they would be like, "I just bought the Bundle. I just want to say thanks. Bye." It was just a short thing. When I saw it, I would voice memo them back and I would say like, "Jen, thanks so much. Thanks for telling me. I am so excited for you." I would be excited because I also genuinely was. And then, I would say, "How does it feel?" And then, they would come back to me and be like, "It actually feels so great. I'm so relieved. I'm so happy I found you." And then, this gave me not only such positive energy, but then I was sharing that with other people. And it all just started to snowball, I felt like.

Jen Diaz:

Well, and that goes back to kind of what we were talking about, about you're not important. It's connection. It's viewing each client, each customer that's coming in as a human, respecting that, honoring that, seeing them in that and not a number. And what an honor that we get to do this type of work, that we get to make an impact in the way that we do. Every single person matters and is connected with us enough to trust us to invest. And I think that taking that, that's something I don't mess around with. I feel like taking that very seriously, honoring that, respecting that is really helpful to keep us in check too.

Kind of what you were saying earlier, how you used to, you would think Why is nobody buying this product? That's entitlement. We hate that idea. It's very shadowy. It's not comfortable. No one wants to be entitled. But yet, we can be at times. And so, it's helpful to recognize if I can put my entitlement down and focus on each individual person that I would love to welcome into this, that I would love to serve, that I've created this for, that I hope to impact, it just changes the way that we feel about what we do. It changes the way that we show up and sell it. It really is, I think, a way more beautiful thing. And people can tell. People know when they're appreciated and when they are just another number coming in.

Sam Vander Wielen:

Yeah, absolutely. I feel like that's a great place for us to wrap up today. My olive guys, you know, I call it my olive garden theory of once you're here, your family, so I really do treat people like, cool, now you're part of the crew. Thanks so much. Come on in. I mean, that's what I was saying to people, like welcome to the community. I'm so happy you're part of our crew now. And it feels that way, but I genuinely feel that way. And I do think that that kind of stuff will sell more of your product than any strategy I could give you or a tip. Because a friend telling another people in their group or they're in a coaching program, they tell them about your product or something, it's always going to work better for you than you trying to sell to everyone.

Jen Diaz:

Well, word of mouth, your reputation always matters. And in the long game, always matters. And it's important to think about, but, yeah, that's true. You do a beautiful job of that in how much you do serve your clients and customers and even audience with all the information you put out to be helpful. Everyone, we're all, me included, are very, very fortunate to know you and to be able to connect with you here.

Sam Vander Wielen:

Oh, thank you. Well, to bring it full circle, I think it's easy when you really love what you do. So, I love doing this and I am bursting at the seams with creative ideas every day and I think that's because they genuinely enjoy what I'm doing. So, I think this stuff really works, guys, that's what I'm going to say.

I would love for you to tell people, not only where to find you, but if you have something for them, what's a best next step if they're now equally as obsessed with you as I am and they were like, "I want to be now in her circle," where can they find you?

Jen Diaz:

That's very kind. Yes, you can find me on my website at jenniferdiaz.com. Sign up for my newsletter there as well. I send out a Monday Mindset Newsletter with some tips from me on mindset, business, video, journal prompts. And you can also find me on Instagram, @jenmdiaz.

Sam Vander Wielen:

Cool. I'll link to everything below. Thank you so much for being back. Thanks for being my first repeater.

Jen Diaz:

I'm very honored. Thank you for having me back. I appreciate it.

Sam Vander Wielen:

Thanks so much for listening to the On Your Terms podcast. Make sure to follow on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you like to listen to podcasts. You can also check out all of our podcast episodes, show notes, links, and more at samvanderwielen.com/podcast. You can learn more about legally protecting your business and take my free legal workshop, Five Steps to Legally Protect and Grow Your Online Business, at samvanderwielen.com. And to stay connected and follow along, follow me on Instagram, @samvanderwielen, and send me a DM to say hi.

Just remember that although I am a attorney, I am not your attorney and I am not offering you legal advice in today's episode. This episode and all of my episodes are informational and educational only. It is not a substitute for seeking out your own advice from your own lawyer. And please keep in mind that I can't offer you legal advice. I don't ever offer any legal services. But I think I offer some pretty good information.