When you think about your school's PTO or PTA, what comes to mind? Fundraisers? Teacher appreciation lunches? The same handful of parents volunteering for everything?

What if we're overlooking one of the biggest opportunities to make teaching a little easier?

In this episode of The Resilient Teacher Podcast, I'm joined by Christina Hidek, founder of PTO Answers, to talk about how parent-teacher organizations can become so much more than fundraising committees.

Because here's the thing: teachers are already juggling enough. And while we talk a lot about getting parents more involved in their children's education, we don't always talk about what meaningful parent involvement could actually look like or how it could take some of the pressure off teachers.

Christina shares why so many schools struggle with parent engagement, how the pandemic changed the way families connect with schools, and what teachers can do to build stronger partnerships with parents (even when it feels like nobody wants to volunteer).

We also talk about something I think a lot of teachers need to hear: Just because a parent hasn't volunteered doesn't mean they don't want to help. Sometimes they just need to be invited in a different way.

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Welcome back to the Resilient Teacher

Podcast.

I'm really excited today to be here with

Christina Hydeck.

Welcome to the Resilient Teacher Podcast.

Brittany,

I am so excited for our conversation.

I know it's going to be a fantastic

one.

Yes.

So I would love for you just to

kind of give a little bit of background

on in the intro.

I gave a little bit of background about

who you are and what you do.

But I would love to just kind of

talk about how you ended up here and

really like with this focus and passion

with, you know, parent groups.

Extreme nerdom.

You're wondering how that.

Well, kind of organically Brittany.

So I,

this kind of goes back to something we

were talking about earlier.

I was in,

I was in a sorority in college and

that really inspired me to be a leader.

Like I was put into a leadership position

very early.

And so those skills were really honed.

And I, I,

I love a good project and I love

to get in and just make a plan

and get it done.

So it's, I think, really no surprise.

I'm never surprised when I end up as

a leader because even like when I go

out into the wild to like stores and

I'm not in like store colors,

people will come up to me and ask

me, do you work here?

Because I think I asked somebody,

what is it?

And they're like,

you just look like you're in charge.

Right.

okay,

because I'm just like trying to do my

thing.

But really I got involved early in my

children's school as a PTO leader.

I was looking for connection.

A lot of my friends in the area,

they were either doctors themselves or

married to doctors.

And so they were here for their residency

while they had their maybe first or second

child.

And so I got to know them in

that capacity.

And then they got, you know,

big girl or big boy doctor jobs somewhere

else.

And

And so I was like,

I need to expand my friend group.

So this is going to be built in

people that I can hang with.

And I will get to be further connected

to my kids who I'm sending off to

go hang out with other people, you know,

most of the time.

And my mom is a retired teacher.

So that's kind of where it got started.

And then how I got

really inspired to take a microphone is I

was thinking like,

it shouldn't be so hard.

Like I was,

I was looking at all the materials I

had and I'm like,

I know I'm a go-getter,

but not everyone's like that.

Like some people just need a plan.

They need more of the answers and they're

not like, I will love to,

I love to figure things out.

I love to figure out how to fix

things.

Like whether it's my, you know,

ice maker that suddenly start has jammed

up and it's annoying me or,

or a project at school where we're like,

why are we raising as much money as

we used to?

Really like to get in there.

But not everyone's like that.

So sometimes they actually need the

answers.

And I've never been one to shy away

from giving my opinion and telling it to

people straight.

Like, not what I think they think or...

I'm going to screw this up.

Not like the nice way or not the

gentle way, but like the actual,

like the actual information that you need.

Not going to...

I do try and like soft code it,

but it's not baloney.

Yeah.

Like I am...

I actually really love the way that you

said that because like...

I think a lot of people struggle with

that, right?

Like they struggle to like share their

opinion.

And I love how just like honest you

are right there.

You're like, well,

I don't like try to sugarcoat it.

I just say what needs to be said

and that's how you get stuff done, right?

Well, yes.

I like to beat around the bush because

that does waste time.

Just like, let's get to it.

So yeah,

I forget how many years ago I started

PTO Answers,

but I started it just because I was

noticing there wasn't great advice out

there.

There was very middle of the road,

vanilla, not going to offend anybody,

but also wasn't really going to help

anybody because it wasn't actually...

what people needed,

what other parent volunteers needed or

what teachers needed.

And so then as I've developed,

gotten more experienced myself,

I was involved as a parent,

a school parent volunteer the entire time

my kids were in school.

My youngest just graduated in May.

So that is, um,

Of PTO, PTA experience,

not including what I did in preschool.

So because there was some leadership stuff

there.

So still technically parent involvement

there because that starts, you know,

as soon as they come out.

So I have leaned into more talking to

teachers and talking to administrators

because it is.

Everyone's in their silo,

but we're all working together for

something similar and better.

It's called a parent-teacher organization

for a reason.

It's not a parent organization.

Right.

When most teachers hear PTO,

they probably think about fundraisers and

school events and the same small group of

parents doing everything.

What are those teachers really missing

when we view a parent group only through

that lens?

Everything.

Everything.

Yeah.

Literally everything.

If that is all that you think your

PTO is capable of or is there for,

then you are really missing the boat and

you're missing a ginormous opportunity

to...

Spread your workload.

And it's not like you're just passing off

the stuff.

It's really you're inviting them into the

community of the educational community,

because most parents have not stepped into

a school since they were last in school

because most parents aren't educators.

And it's a whole like how much changes

year over year versus now.

You know, since people graduated,

it's just, it's amazing.

So it's like parents don't know what they

don't know about the school process,

system, techniques, new learning methods.

And so really when you pigeonhole PTOs

into just fundraising,

then you're really missing out on the

connection aspect.

You're missing out on an opportunity to

educate them about the state of education

and the

and expectations and new strategies,

new tactics they could be using at home.

You're missing out on an opportunity to

have a collaboration partner to get your

own.

Maybe you have big plans for your

classroom.

Maybe you have

kids that need to work out their energy

in a non-verbal way and so but you're

like oh I've looked at you know the

ball chairs or chair balls you know

whatever and they're like really pricey

like how you're already paying for enough

out of your pocket like well you could

just continue to save up for those or

maybe you could see what how you know

the parents can help you out and

and to supplement your classroom so those

are just a few things but also there

have been times when the parent and

teacher um their goals and their viewpoint

were more aligned and maybe not in um

Not kind of opposite of the

administration.

So you have that partnership opportunity

and you have a different way to advocate

for yourself when you are a teacher,

either individually or collectively,

because maybe your contract is expiring

and there's questions of strikes like

that.

That happened a couple of times during my

time.

kids time in school.

And so had to walk the delicate line

of my parent hat is on now.

Come talk to me about strike stuff.

And then, or it's,

this is my PTO hat.

I can't talk to you about that right

now.

So I'm thinking about like there were,

I have been a part of as a

teacher and a parent,

some really great schools where parents

were pretty involved and pretty engaged

and

And then earlier in my career where I

was teaching at a title one school or

a low income school,

it was pretty difficult to get parent

involvement and parent engagement.

Have you worked with any like parents or

groups of parents that, you know, like,

or schools even where that has been the

case?

Oh yeah, that was, yes, yes.

And even more so post-pandemic because

really the landscape has changed.

I think a lot of things have reset

as far as expectations from parents,

but a lot of the cultural norms that

we had in our schools were so deeply

disrupted during the pandemic and didn't

really come back because you lost that

institutional knowledge of

This is how we do things, right?

So a lot of those parent family engagement

programs or family fun nights or a lot

of, you know,

a lot of the things that the PTOs

were doing, for example, couldn't happen.

And so the pandemic lasted long enough and

the effects were deep enough that it

really,

I think we've still yet to feel the

full effect of it because we

for the parents who had elementary school

kids,

their perception of what school looks like

and what PTO looks like is drastically

different than if for earlier parents,

you know, who are older,

I shouldn't say older parents,

parents with older kids who are at a

different point in the school because they

started elementary and then they go all

the way through twelfth grade.

So it looks different that entire cycle.

So there's really a lot of reeducation

that needs to happen.

And for the parents,

and that is definitely a place where

teachers and principals can make that

happen.

And it's not as hard as they as

people might think to do that.

Yeah.

What what are some of the ideas that

you have in order to like read?

I guess,

re-engage or re-involve parents that maybe

historically have not been, you know,

super engaged or super involved?

Like how can that,

how can we start to really bring that

community together?

It starts with educating.

Okay.

First you have to have a plan.

Then you have to get them in on

the plan because you can't just dictate to

parents because that's not going to go

over very well at all.

But if you bring them in as a

partner and say,

here are the goals of the community,

how would you like to be involved?

Don't assume that they don't want to be

involved just because they haven't been.

When you look at other volunteer

opportunities, I'm guessing,

are you a big volunteer, Brittany?

Like you raise your hand.

I am actually a big volunteer,

but I think that's my nature,

like to be that way.

Yes, but I think.

I think there are people in the world

who are not that way,

who don't just go out there and look

for ways to volunteer.

And so obviously those are the people like

I'm thinking about too.

Right, right, right.

But because they don't automatically raise

their hand doesn't mean that they're going

to be a no.

It means that you need to ask them

in a different way.

And more than once,

like just because you ask them at the

beginning of school, you know,

on a random Thursday, hey,

can you help me out with this?

And they say no,

that doesn't mean you should never

approach them again.

That just means on that Thursday,

that ask was not either well-timed

or they didn't know what they were getting

into or they didn't,

the scope was too big.

Cause sometimes the asks are too big for

the person, you know,

you give me a big job and I

will go to town on it.

Like there's,

there's nothing that I'd be like,

that's too much.

Cause I, I know people, I have friends,

so I'll bring them in and we'll make

it happen together.

Um,

But some people, you know,

a lot of people aren't like that.

So I think you really have to be

intentional on what you are looking for

and communicate what you're looking for.

But then also you need to equip the

parent volunteers.

And this is one of the...

and this is not really the job of

the teachers,

but the teachers could suggest it to the

school leader,

the principals and the administration,

because volunteers,

you don't come in knowing how to run

a PTO.

Like, nope, nobody does.

Even like I had a lot of previous

experience with running other nonprofit

organizations,

and I still didn't know everything.

I still now, after fifteen years,

I still don't know everything because it's

impossible.

but other people need to be supported.

They need a little more guidance.

So if you give them the tools and

the resources and they just have to put

it into action versus them having to

figure out what to do first and then

have to figure out how to put it

into action,

it just really reduces the scope of the

ask for them to be involved because they

if you have a school where it typically

has been very low or no parent

involvement,

they don't know what that looks like.

Right.

When is the last capacity either?

I was just thinking about this too.

Like they perhaps don't have the capacity.

Maybe they're working during that time,

but if you had like options of ways

to be involved.

Oh, absolutely.

Be more so willing to,

I'm making these connections right now.

Like I'm, I'm putting on my,

my schema hat, if you will.

I'm thinking about like, okay,

my daughters are in cheer.

I was not actually super involved in that

until my second or third year because I

didn't have that community and I didn't

know what to expect.

So I kind of...

sat back and like watched for a while

and now we're in the place where we're

like okay these that we have new people

who are who have joined the gym that

we want to get involved how can we

prepare them for that and so like I'm

actually thinking about this in that lens

and like how some people just need options

like here's ways to contribute here's ways

to be involved and

it gives them like different opportunities

to become more engaged, right?

Yeah,

because you have to meet them where they

are.

And they're not necessarily going to say,

look, I'm struggling right now.

I mean, a lot of people, you know,

the sandwich generation,

where you're dealing with your kids,

but you're also helping maybe parents or

grandparents.

I mean, that's a thing.

So it's like you really,

and you don't know what's going on in

people's homes because maybe they don't

want to share their whole life story with

you.

So you really do need to be open

to providing the different opportunities

at different levels and also modeling what

things look like.

And that's what I have.

I have a friend who,

She's a go-getter like me.

And I said, girl,

you need to stop because you are modeling

the impossible.

Like no one is going to want to

follow you as PTO president because you

have set the expectations up here.

Because she was in the building like three

to four days a week.

And I was like, you can't,

that's too much.

And she's like,

but we're doing all these great things and

I'm having so much fun.

And I said, and you're killing the PTO.

Like I say it with love,

but like you can't go gangbusters because

other people will look at that and say,

well, I can never do that.

Even though that gangbusters level is not

the expectation because it's not the

reality,

but that's the perceived community and

like how that's perceived by teachers and

like the teachers could then be kind of

let down when she leaves.

You know what I mean?

Like I'm even thinking about those

situations.

Yeah.

Yep.

So it goes both ways.

There's like a happy medium and it's going

to be different for every school community

and every year.

Like every year it's going to change

because you have a different mix of PTO

leaders because some people have new

parents coming to the school and then you

have kids who are graduating out and the

parents who are moving on with their

kiddos into a new building or, you know,

out of the system entirely.

Yes.

Schools and families often like share that

same big goal.

I think they want to help the kids,

the students succeed.

So I'm thinking about some other

situations where teachers may not feel

that way.

Why can it still feel like they're working

against each other?

Probably because they're not communicating

in the way that.

So have you ever been to a title

one presentation?

Yeah.

that's full of gobbledygook that maybe now

you, I call it gobbledygook because you,

like all the acronyms,

I cannot get over all the acronyms in

education.

I have no idea what this stuff means.

So it's like,

and I went to law school.

It's like, I am good at decoding language.

I have advanced reading comprehension

skills and I still can't get it.

So like,

if you were talking to parents with all

of that gobbledygook, I'll say like,

They are not hearing you.

So you're like,

I'm giving them all the information.

What is the problem?

And they're like,

no idea what they're saying.

And I don't want to ask because I

don't want to look like I'm dumb because

the expectation is that I should know this

from where I don't know.

I don't know where this expectation comes

from, but that's,

so I think there's like that disconnect

there that could really be happening.

So I think you really need to break

it down and also have honest

conversations.

So I think like,

can we get into some practical tips for

that?

people absolutely okay so if you have a

situation where you've you as a teacher

are feeling like the parents are not

hearing me i'm not i'm i'm asking for

xyz or i need xyz maybe you're just

at that like ideation phase right you

haven't figured out exactly what comes

next

Find a parent that you think is game.

You know the parents who are game.

They're the ones that have extended eye

contact with you,

that hang out a little bit longer,

that maybe have said,

let me know if you need anything.

Or maybe that your building principal has

maybe mentioned.

You can always pick them out.

Go talk to them and have a conversation.

Be like, what do you think?

Here's my game plan.

How do you want...

do you want to be involved with this?

And that's kind of how you start and

then see what resources they need.

And so I should have said,

I developed those resources.

I think I talked about it at the

beginning too.

So I have those resources where you can

give them to your parents where they have

the tools and specific templates and the

specific process that

It works for all school parent groups,

but then you customize it for your

specific needs.

So you get all that you need and

then tweak the colors or tweak, you know,

do the minor,

minor things to make it exactly what you

need for your situation.

I was thinking one of the things that

I always put in my back to school

packet is a way to ask parents like

how they want to be involved because like

it may change season by season.

They could have like a really, you know,

a job where maybe they can't do things

in the fall,

but wintertime is a really good time.

Or maybe they're another teacher.

So then they can't.

you know,

do things in the school building,

but they could do cutting things out or

printing things,

or maybe they're a Venmo mom.

I was,

I can be a Venmo mom sometimes depending

on my workload, you know,

like I'm stealing that.

Yeah.

The Venmo.

to you to create whatever,

but I just can't be hands-on at this

moment.

And so that's one of the things that

I did in my packet and back to

school was like in my information where I

wanted to know like about the student from

the parent and all of that,

I asked like,

how do they want to be involved?

Do they just want me to text them,

you know, when their kid's doing well or,

or bad,

or do they want to like help out?

Do they want to be a part of

this?

And like,

I like how you said earlier that you

need to ask them more than one time,

like,

because that is something I don't guess I

really have done in the past either is

like asked,

how do they want to be involved after

that beginning of the year thing?

But I also like how you said,

you know, those parents too.

So maybe they said they want to be

slightly involved,

but like they have like

slightly longer eye contact, right?

Like you, you know, those parents,

you'll get to know those parents,

those parents who are emailing you or who

are texting you.

But at the beginning of the year,

maybe it's just easier to like pick that

out.

Well, yeah,

but think also circumstances can change,

you know, and, and,

and maybe I am a firm believer that

the

way to really get parents engaged in PTOs

is to show them what PTOs do,

because then they have a clear vision,

clear understanding of,

Of like the why.

So that's why I'm always advocating for

PTOs to put on family fun events or

student fun,

like however you want to say it.

But bring people together because when you

go to that,

like we had in my elementary school,

we had a local professor who would come

in and do like a chemistry show.

So he would like change colors of liquids

and, you know,

all that science stuff and

I was a sociology major and then went

to law school.

So it's just science-y stuff for me.

But he would come in and make things

smoke and boil and it was all like

mad science-y.

And parents were like,

this is fabulous because it's not like

you're just going to be like, hey,

professor,

come to my house and do a chemistry

show for my kids, right?

It only happens because of the community.

And so that the opportunity is there.

And if you're not coming together, then...

then that's just like a mischance.

Right.

You mentioned the templates.

What kind of things are inside of those

templates and how can they be used by

teachers and parents alike?

So for,

it depends on the role because every role

in a PTO is different.

So let's talk about the teacher liaison.

Like I firmly believe that every PTO needs

to have a teacher liaison.

So that means a teacher who's going to

all of the meetings and it doesn't have

to be one teacher the entire year.

You can do it as a committee.

It's the relationship will get deeper,

faster, you know, better or deeper,

better, faster.

If you have one or two teachers,

Teachers who are going to the meetings

because that consistency, it's like that,

you know,

repeated contacts that you're going to

have a chance for the development of the

relationship.

So for the teacher liaison, for example,

it's a printable binder that you can set

up that has a place for all of

your notes that you can print.

Because the job of the teacher liaison is

to bring information to the PTO from the

school, from the teachers,

and then also take items back to the

teachers from the PTO.

Either asks opportunities,

maybe there's teacher grants that are

available.

all that kind of stuff.

So it's the actual form.

So you have a place to keep everything.

So in addition to being a recovering

attorney,

I'm also a professional organizer.

So there's not a paper,

like I don't like to have loose papers.

I like to have one place

to find everything so when I was early

on in my PTO career I had I

was president right well my second year so

I was elected the April of my first

year and I hadn't even been to all

of the meetings because I had a baby

and I was like I don't I can't

be bringing the infant everywhere so

But at the end of the year,

I was the president elect.

And so I was given this huge binder

and I was like,

this is a lot of information.

It's a lot of information that I don't

exactly need.

And it wasn't organized in a way that

it was usable for me.

So I created that structure for each

officer.

So the president has their own structure.

binder with specific forms and templates

that they will need either to like run

meetings or to keep officers

like on the right track.

Cause the president's job is kind of keep

all of the balls in the air.

So their kid is going to look very

different than the treasurer's kit.

Cause their job is to track all the

money.

So the kids it's,

it's very hyper role specific.

So there's some commonalities where

everyone has a binder.

Cause I am still a paper person.

And most, some people are like, why,

why do you still offer paper binders?

And I was like,

because most people still use binders.

Like I,

Some people have switched to digital,

but digital is very easy to lose and

it's hard to understand what you have in

front of you or what you have available

to you without it being kind of in

front of you.

So the kits are designed to be either

used digitally or in a paper format.

And then for the,

I have a kit for principals too,

because there's no PTO school for parents.

There's none for teachers.

Like, did you get any,

were PTOs even brought up in your

education?

I think it was,

but it was more along the lines of

what types of ways to engage parents,

but the actual... No.

Mm-mm.

You were really trying to bring it on

and be like, yes, it was.

So not functionally,

not something that was effective for you.

So it was kind of glossed over,

very high level.

This is something you should consider,

but not actual like the nuts and bolts

of this is how PTOs operate.

Right.

That doesn't, well,

it does exist because I created it because

it didn't exist.

And I last year published a book for

principals because I thought, okay,

we got to figure out like,

Principals are struggling with this, too.

Yeah.

With teachers.

Either they have a group of parents who

are...

not in like a,

they don't have like a healthy setup.

So their group is maybe very

dysfunctional.

So it's taking up a lot of their

time or they have a gangbusters group that

is just going to town and everything.

And they're, they're just like,

Oh my gosh,

I'm just feeling like they could go off

the rails at any second because the energy

from the group is just so vibrant.

Do you know?

Or maybe they have nothing at all and

they want to get something started and

So I was like, I need to,

I was on a different podcast and someone's

like, this, this is all great.

This should be in a book.

And I was like, Oh, okay.

I guess I need to write a book

then.

And so when I,

I did a little bit of research to

figure out if there were other books kind

of in the marketplace on this.

Do you know what year I found was

the last published book about a PTO about

what it does and how it runs?

What year?

Nineteen oh two.

Oh, my goodness.

Or nineteen oh three.

So what?

OK, you know, I picked nineteen oh two,

but it was.

Yes.

Over a hundred years ago.

And I thought, OK, well,

things have changed slightly.

So there's an opportunity there.

Just a little bit.

So yeah,

so the book walks through everything a

principal needs to know about how to

either work with an existing group that's

going really well,

bring a group that has maybe lost its

way back on track,

or start a group from scratch.

But it really limits everything.

It limits the view for principals so that

they're not having to consider everything.

And it gives like kind of like a

high level,

gives them exactly what they need to know

and not more because principals and

teachers don't have time for this.

So it talks about the role of teachers

and explains that about the teacher

liaison and how to pick one and how

they shouldn't be picking one.

how that needs to be a parent opportunity

for them to approach a teacher and not

a principal because it raises so many

questions when a principal makes the ask.

So all that kind of stuff.

Yeah.

Well,

Lauren put the link for that down in

the show notes.

That way, you know, teachers,

if they're looking for this resource or...

want to give, you know,

this resource to a principal,

they can have that available to them.

Last question, because I know that we,

you know, we were at time,

but what do you wish that every teacher

understood about the role of a strong PTO

or PTA and how that can play it

play within the school community?

I think it's important to understand that

no one comes in knowing how to do

this.

And so some grace is always good,

but also looking at that as an opportunity

to bring them into the fold meaningfully

and that they can really leverage the

excitement,

the energy and passion of the parents to

make their lives in the classroom and

outside of the classroom better.

Yeah.

I love that.

I love that.

And I think this is just a really

good reminder for all the teachers out

there who are struggling with burnout that

you can delegate to parents.

And maybe this is just a reminder that

you can ask more than one time or

you can proactively find those parents who

would be willing to help support and

it all makes the school community better

by being a part of that community.

And so, um,

hopefully this is a reminder to those

teachers out there who are struggling

that, that, that,

that resource is available.

Um, and much more than just fundraising.

Oh gosh.

Oh gosh.

Yeah.

I have a freebie actually that breaks down

five different,

like five no brainer ways to, um,

Increase the improve the teacher parent

relationship.

So it's everything what PTO PTA parents

wish that teachers knew so they can grab

that.

Yeah.

At PTO answers dot com slash teachers.

And I'll send that link to you, too.

Absolutely.

Yes.

So we'll make sure to put that in

the show notes as well.

Thank you, Christina,

for this conversation today.

And thank you for just being so willing

to be that go getter.

Not everybody has that unique skill set,

but it's obvious that this was needed and

so thankful for you.

You're so welcome.

Thanks for having me on.

I love talking with you.