In this replay episode, Carole talks to Jani Ortlund, author of the book, A Child’s First Book About Marriage: God’s Way is Always Best.

Amidst so much turmoil and confusion over marriage and sexuality in our day, parents needed a tool to talk with their children about God’s design for marriage. Jani Ortlund has provided that tool!

Jani shares her heart and vision of this book, and even reads an excerpt!

You will be enriched and encouraged to faithfully pray for and teach your children casting all your cares upon God for He cares for you.

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Over the course of this podcast, we've interviewed some amazing guests. During the month of October, we are bringing episodes out of our archives to help us with the hard topics of our time and culture, such as human sexuality, God's design for marriage, and discipling our kids in a divided age. We share these episodes to fortify your confidence in God's word as you face tough questions and hard realities with your children. We hope this conversation will give you the assurance that God's way is always best.

You're listening to the Homeschool Made Simple podcast. This is a podcast to help you homeschool simply, inexpensively, and enjoyably. Listen in.

Well, today, I am absolutely delighted to introduce my new friend and my sister in Christ, Jani Ortland. She and her husband, Ray Ortland junior, have been in ministry for 50 years of their beautiful and blessed marriage. She's been a ministry wife, a professor's wife, and a pastor's wife. They have 4 adult children and 15 grandchildren. Can you imagine Christmas shopping for 15 grandchildren? And she looks like she just stepped out of high school cheerleading squad. She's young and beautiful. I'm getting to look at her right now. You don't have the the treat.

But, I wanted to share some of the books Jani's written, and then I'll introduce her to you again. So she wrote a book that I'm dying to get my hands on because I just heard about it this morning. It's called Fearlessly Feminine. Fearlessly Feminine. It's published by Multnomah. And then she did a book I'm very intrigued by. It's on the Ten Commandments, and it's called His Loving Law, My Lasting Legacy. His Loving Law, my lasting legacy.

And these titles will also be in our show notes, so don't panic if you're driving down the highway. And then her brand new book is called, I love this title, Help. I'm married to my pastor. I love that title, and it's a delightful book of encouragement. My friend, who's a pastor's wife, has been so blessed by it, and I think you all will be as well. But today, Jani, welcome. I'm so glad you're with me.

Oh, thank you. I'm delighted to be with you, Carol. What a privilege.

Thank you. So a little disclosure. I am friends with Jani and Ray's beautiful daughter, Krista, and she and her family were part of my, children's ministry when I was a children's pastor back in Wheaton, Illinois. And I just love Jani's grandchildren and wanna kidnap them. They are the most precious, tenderhearted children. I love them, and my granddaughter is very close to Lizzie. And so when my granddaughter would come to town, she and Lizzie would go, and they would run off into the sunset together. So they they are 2 peas in a pod.

So, Jani, you and Ray have been involved with a, I believe, a church plant for several years there in Nashville. But Ray and Jani are very enmeshed in a beautiful ministry called Renewal Ministry that both of them, speak and write for and mentor people internationally. So I had an agenda for us today and that is to talk about a book that every child in America and the world, if I were master of the universe, I would require every every child be raised with this book. And it's Jani's book called A Child's First Book About Marriage. A child's first book about marriage subtitled God's Way is Always Best, and it's published by, Christian Focus in Scotland. And those of you who have been at my seminars know that I sell these books from Christian Focus by the case lots, All the biographies I bring and a lot of the Christian history books that I sell when I speak are from this publisher, so she's in really good company. So, Jani, tell us the story of how this book came came to be. Oh,

Carol, first of all, I just wanna thank you again for having me on here. This is such a privilege and I greet all of your listeners and want to encourage them the way you do. This book, came to be out of my grandma's heart, my own grandmotherly heart, for my grandchildren. Grandchildren. Yeah. That they would have something that they could hold in their hands and read and understand on their level of God's plan for marriage because certainly they're seeing and hearing a lot of different types of marriage in the world around them. That's right. I also wanted to give parents something that they could read to their kids Mhmm.

From the time they start speaking.

Yes. So you put a tool in parents' hands that we really needed in the body of Christ, and I don't think anybody had really done it before. I mean, we talk about marriage, but not the issues of the day have not been made into a book for children. Does that make sense?

It does. And when a a child is in a neighborhood, perhaps, with, transgender neighbors Gosh. Or, perhaps, 2 women who are married, and and the child sees them doing things and wonders about it. We need biblical answers. Answers from God, not just from our own experience or our own family. We need answers that can give them the assurance of what marriage is, why it's so beautiful, and why we can trust God to follow his way.

Oh, that's so, so good. There was a a page that I if you don't mind you do you have the book in front of you? You probably don't. I do. It's right here, Carol. Oh, good. Because I'd love for you to read it, and it's the page, showing the people on the subway. Yes. It's so beautifully written, Jenny, and I would love you to read it for our listeners.

Alright. Let me see. Yes. It's right There

are no page numbers. I was gonna give you the page number, but there aren't any.

Well, I found it. This is for the listeners, this is a picture of, some adults riding, subway, and they're reading different books and newspapers with headlines like divorce rates increase, and support gay marriage, and get rich quick, and have it all. Things like that that, parents are dealing with. But this is what I say. Some people get mixed up in another way. Now I've just spoken about divorce. So the first thing I try to deal with is divorce. But then I go on to say some people get mixed up in another way.

Some people think that marriage can be between 2 men or 2 women or that a husband can have more than one wife. Some people think everyone will be happier if they can do whatever they want and decide for themselves what marriage should be. Sometimes we want the wrong things. Things that we think will make us happy but really can't. God teaches us about true happiness. He says that real, forever happiness only comes from knowing and following him. We find that in Psalm 62:1. Part of following God is believing what he says about marriage.

Marriage isn't what we think it should be. Marriage is what God says it should be. Why? Because God made us and God made marriage. God says marriage is between one man and one woman for life, and God's way is always loving and best.

Oh, I love this book, and I love your part. And you know what is so sweet to me is that you do you know, you're telling children the truth, but you're not telling them so that they're little Pharisees. You're giving them such a heart of kindness and gratitude in, you know, dealing with people that may not have biblical understanding or practice, but you still teach the children to be very loving and very kind and not to be little snips. You know what I mean? Because this is

We're all we're all little snips at heart. We're all spirits. Carol, we don't know each other that well, but I can tell you, if you were with me for more than an hour, you might see a a pharisaical thought come out verbally. That's why Jesus had to die. And so it's it's very important, I think, in our Christian families, as Christian adults, to model for children a kindness and love for others, who don't yet know Jesus. The reason that they're living that way is because they don't know Jesus yet. Maybe we will be the ones that get to share about Jesus with them, but we won't have a chance if we don't be kind to them. So that kind of idea of we're all in the same boat, except Jesus rescued us.

Now let's share how they can get in the rescue boat with us.

What are some of the other topics that you shared about in the book that you felt like your grandchildren need needed to hear?

Well, I wanted them to know that male and female come from God. In the beginning, God created both. He didn't create, an in between. He created a man. And then I I teach about how he very specifically created the woman in an entirely different way than he created anything else on earth. And showing the the special bond he has with his creation of woman. And then how God brought them together. I talk about the first marriage.

I talk about how marriage the beauty of marriage and also the difficulty of marriage. It's beautiful to have someone there to share your joys with and to cheer you on when you do something well and to encourage you when you do something pretty poorly.

Yes.

To grieve with you when you grieve, and to rejoice with you when you rejoice as Romans 12 says. But that's not always easy because we're selfish, And that's what I want the child to see. I'm hoping that this can even lead, to a clearer vision of what it means to be a Christian. Because where would would each one of us be without the lord Jesus? I also talk about divorce because parents need a tool to talk to children and grandchildren, nieces and nephews about divorce. I also talk the the large vision over the whole book, Carol, is why marriage? Well, because God created it to give us a tiny foretaste, a little tiny vision of the heavenly marriage, of what we're going to be involved in throughout all eternity, intimately with the Lord Jesus Christ. His church in love with him forever, joyfully submitting to him, and his loving care over his church forever.

Yes. I love this little page that you wrote, and it says, a biblical marriage shows the world a tiny picture for all to see of the big romance, the one between Christ and his church in love together. When you love Jesus, then you are a part of that church, and nothing and no one will ever be able to separate you from God's love for you. Romans 8 3839. I love that. The whole book is so positive and so joyful. And, you know, as you minister these truths, it's never in condemnation, but it's calling people, I think, to God's best, that God has something better than what they have. And wouldn't you like to have it? Kinda is is the spirit that I think the book is written in.

Well, I'm really glad you see that, Carol. That means that one little bit was able to come through. I'm so glad. That's what I want. I think and you would know this because of your love for children and your education background, your work background, that it's so important to speak hope over children. Yes. It's so important to speak into their future about God's plan. Oh, I wonder who you'll marry.

Do you know I'm praying for that man or that woman, whomever you're speaking right today? Someday, God is going to bring you together. And I believe you're gonna have a wonderful Christian family. That kind of speaking into a child's heart Yes. So that he begins to dream a heavenly Christian sort of dream rather than our translating to them transmitting to to them, perhaps I should say, our own worry and concern about the culture that we have to raise our kids in. Right. Sometimes we spend more time in worry than we do in hope and joy. And I think our our moms particularly, Carol, and our grandmothers too. I know this my own grandmother's heart.

We are concerned for our children and grandchildren, but God says, cast those cares on me. I've got this. I am working my plan, and you are part of it, and wait and see how it's all gonna work out. You just keep looking to me. Wow.

That's so good because I think a lot of Christians have just resigned themselves to, you know, this is the world we're living in. It's just you know? Instead of kind of this, morbid passivity, instead of that vision and that hope that God wants us to pray into our children's lives and speak into their lives as they're growing up. You're absolutely right. Years ago, I volunteered at a crisis pregnancy center in Southern California, and some girls came in, teenage girls, and they were sexually active, and they had a sexually transmitted disease. And they came in. We're talking with us, and there was an older woman there, older than me. I was, you know, very young, maybe in my twenties, or early thirties. But this woman, you know, was maybe in her late forties, and she just started to cast this vision for these girls about how precious they were and how not to sell themselves short and give away themselves to people who don't love or care for them and aren't committed to them.

And she cast this vision of what a relationship should be, the way God created it. And I just remember going, oh, I never heard these things. I was not raised hearing these things. And I was just like, oh, I wish someone had said that to me when I was growing up and spoke those words of, you are precious. And and I might add here, Carol, if I

may, to your listeners who didn't experience a loving father themselves. Right. Or maybe you have some listeners who are divorced right now and a loving daddy isn't in the home so they can't reference that. It makes me think of I think it's, Zephaniah 317. A phrase in there, he will quiet you by his love. And we can cast our cares as women onto our heavenly father. And as he loves us, then we can pour that love into our baby girls. And we can tell them no matter no matter what happens, no matter if you marry the most wonderful man on earth, there will be times when he will disappoint you and you will think, what have I done? But you're you'll stay together.

I know. But there is a father in heaven who will bind your heart with his love. And and we can bring them to scripture and give them that hope beyond what they see in earthly relationships.

Yes.

So that they can rest in God alone and say, okay, mom. Yeah. I get that. I see that in you. You're resting in God. And I want that too. I want him to quiet me with his love in all these questions I have about marriage and children and Yes. Homeschooling or whatever.

Right. That's right. Oh, Jani, this has been such a joy. I'm wondering if you would be so kind as to pray for our listeners and their children.

Oh, I would love to, Carol. Thank you. What a privilege. Yes. Let's bring our hearts together now before the throne of grace. Oh, father, thank you for making a pathway straight up to your throne. What a bloody pathway it was through your son. We thank you and praise you, lord Jesus Christ, for your sacrifice for us to open the way.

And right now, lord, we moms and grandmas and women who are listening and dads as well, we wanna open our hearts to you. And we are asking you for the faith, the courage, the wisdom, the insight to raise the coming generation for you. Lord, we look around us and we get kinda scared. But we look to you and we see light and hope and a way through the storm. Because you extend your hand just as you did to Peter when the waves were tossing him above. You extend your hand when we're scared. All we need to do is take it. So lord, we're looking to you.

And we are asking you for this coming gen generation that our children and grandchildren will learn to love you at an early age. That they will put their faith in Christ alone. That they will look to you for everything they need from here until they see you face to face. Lord, we're asking you for no sexual confusion in their little hearts, but that they will be strong men and godly women before you. We're asking you for purity for our children's sake until they enter marriage. We're asking you for a strong commitment to their local church. Oh, lord. We long for them to be leaders in their generation, leaders of faith and hope and joy in Jesus Christ.

Lord, this is a big prayer, but but, father, I believe that when we come to you with big prayers, you just gather them in and say, oh, don't you wanna ask for a little more? So we just wanna keep asking you, begging you for our children. They mean so very much to us. We give them to you. We thank you for them. We cast them back into your care, casting all our cares on you with deep gratitude and joy. In the name of your son, Jesus Christ, amen.

Amen. Oh, Jani, will you be my prayer partner? Can I call you every morning?

I would be so privileged, Carol. I know you don't have time to do that, but I know you, and I thank you for your ministry. God bless you as you serve him.

Oh, and bless you. What? Oh my goodness. I can just hear my, inbox bursting at the seams when this podcast is playing because you have that that Titus to ministry to young moms. I can tell. And and a generation that's calling out to be mothered, spiritually mothered. And thank you for mothering my listeners today. What a joy, and thank you for your books. And before we close one more time, the title of the book we've been talking about is a child's first book about marriage, God's way is always best by Jani Ortland.

You've been listening to the Homeschool Made Simple podcast. If you like what you heard in this episode, please leave a rating and review on Apple Podcast or Spotify, or share this episode with a friend. It means so much when you help us spread the message of Homeschool Made Simple with others. Thanks for joining us this week on the Homeschool Made Simple podcast. Remember, Jesus' commandments are not burdensome. What he calls you to do, he will enable you to do. Blessings.