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Given a 2% chance to live: Defining all odds against cancer | Ep. 86 with Wade Lewis
Episode 8627th March 2024 • No Grey Areas • Joseph Gagliano
00:00:00 00:50:13

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On this compelling episode of the "No Grey Areas" podcast, Patrick McCalla hosts Wade Lewis, a remarkable individual who defied a dire brain cancer diagnosis with a small chance of survival. From the initial point of cancer discovery, Wade shares his experience and poignant journey of resilience and gratitude.

Retiring from a high-profile career, Wade reflects on how this experience shifted his priorities and outlook on life. He discusses the cultural pressures of achievement and success and emphasizes the importance of appreciating life's small moments with the ones you love.

The episode concludes with a powerful reminder to live each day with intention, gratitude, and purpose since none of us are promised tomorrow. Patrick and Wade will be sure to move you in this conversation that transcends hardship, reminding us to find purpose, even in the face of life's toughest challenges.

Be sure to like our podcast, share it with a friend, and leave a review!

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No Grey Areas is a motivational podcast with captivating guests centered around how our choices humanize, empower, and define who we become. This podcast is inspired by the cautionary tale, No Grey Areas, written by Joseph Gagliano. Learn more about the truth behind his story involved with sports' biggest scandal at nogreyareas.com


#habits #success #change #motivation #motivational #inspiration #difference #choices #nga #purpose #liveonpurose #lifestyle #better #mentalhealth #decisions

Transcripts

::

Host

What if you were told you had six months left to live? Would that make you change the way you spend your time? Today we have cancer fighter Wade Lewis as he shares his resilient battle against brain cancer, defying the odds of survival. Wade True story of gratitude, intentional living and embracing failure as a lesson will inspire you to reevaluate life's priorities while offering tangible ways on how to live each day like it may be your last.

::

Host

Let's get started.

::

Pat McCalla

Wade Louis, thank you so much for being on the No Gray Areas podcast. We met each other a couple of years ago and we've had coffee now, well, just once.

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah,

::

Wade Lewis

got yeah,

::

Pat McCalla

I spent 10 minutes with you and I'm like, I like this dude, but

::

Pat McCalla

wanted you here because you have an amazing story.

::

Pat McCalla

And we're going unpack a bunch of stuff, but we talk about on no gray areas of power and complexity of human choice.

::

Pat McCalla

Four years ago, something happened to you that changed the direction of your life. So unpack that,

::

Wade Lewis

Yes. So

::

Wade Lewis

I'm on a flight coming back from Canada. Bombardier, my customer and my wife text and says, Hey, I got us tickets to see Norm MacDonald and then we're going to go see him and then we're going to go stay in the hotel.

::

Wade Lewis

Perfect. Go watch Norm. He killed it. It was great. And then at about 2 a.m. that evening, I had a grand mal seizure.

::

Wade Lewis

And so that's. That's the full. Yeah, that, that's the full blown one. That's that, that's the one where you're shaking

::

Wade Lewis

can't do anything, you know. Yeah. It's very, very scary. Especially for my wife who if you're not, if you don't have seizures,

::

Wade Lewis

then having your first seizures is quite a, you know, quite a different I've never had a seizure in my life.

::

Wade Lewis

And then the grand mal seizure where. So I'm stiff as a board, you know, just making these crazy things. My wife shaking me. She's trying to figure out what's going on and and so we had been so I traveled a bunch for work, so we've been upgraded. So we got this two bedroom suite to where we actually when she called the the police, the ambulance, she couldn't even get to the to the door because I was seizing on the bed and trying to roll around and stuff like that.

::

Wade Lewis

And so it was so far away they almost had to beat the door in or whatever. And so it was a it was crazy. So then I went straight there to the hospital and to see what the seizure was.

::

Pat McCalla

By the time you got to the hospital where you're still seizing, how long does that

::

Wade Lewis

So I lost a day. So

::

Wade Lewis

that was Friday. The show is Friday. My first memories are on Sunday. So

::

Wade Lewis

lost an entire day. Just gone. Just gone.

::

Pat McCalla

like nothing,

::

Wade Lewis

Nothing. Not, not one thing.

::

Pat McCalla

So then you're at the hospital. They're trying to figure out what this is.

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah.

::

Wade Lewis

So the first thing they told us, they said we don't keep people overnight for seizures. So, you know, don't worry about being here. And then all of a sudden I was there the next day and there again. And so Sunday

::

Pat McCalla

something must

::

Wade Lewis

so Sunday, you know, I kind of start getting my wits about me. And and

::

Wade Lewis

we asked a nurse because no doctors were really talking to us.

::

Wade Lewis

And so we asked a nurse, I just said, hey, So I was told that, you know, I wouldn't be here if if, you know, if it was just a seizure. So we assume there's something else, but we need to be inside of it. So what's going on? She said, well, they found a mass, and so that was the first

::

Wade Lewis

thing that they told me.

::

Wade Lewis

We found a mass.

::

Pat McCalla

what did what did you and your wife feel at that point? Because you still have a lot of unanswered questions. But it was it

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah. And

::

Wade Lewis

so when something happens to me. So I think that people either follow the boat, most people follow on either anxious or anger when when something hits him in the face.

::

Wade Lewis

And so so I'm that I'm the angry guy. So I so when life hits me in the face, I immediately just look around and say, okay, so what's next? You know, what? What are we doing? And so

::

Pat McCalla

smiling because I had

::

Wade Lewis

one time and I knew you were going to I

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah. You know, And so,

::

Wade Lewis

met with the first doctor and they said, hey, so our scans I actually before that I got a copy of my CD and then started my brain scan and my appointment was weeks out and so I started sending it to doctor friends, having him try and read my brain scan before I met with the doctor.

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah, Yeah. And so go and meet with the doctor. And they told me, they said, Hey, we believe it's a low grade glioma where you will have an 88% survival rate. And so went into surgery believing that that the type of brain cancer that they had was a low grade glioma, then went in, did brain surgery. It was about, I think, almost 8 hours.

::

Wade Lewis

The brain surgery was after they got as much of the tumor out as they could, they handed off to a robot. And so the robot goes in and does because I had gone and done like a 3D MRI to where they're asking you questions and they're like, all right, tap these fingers as you're answering and clicking on the blue, you know, circle up there.

::

Wade Lewis

And so

::

Wade Lewis

that way they can understand. You've heard of people playing the piano while they're doing brain. So so they're trying to make sure that, hey, we only want to cut out these things. But they were in my

::

Wade Lewis

kind of minor coordination and that sort of thing. So they wanted to, you know, try and keep as much as I could.

::

Wade Lewis

It was in my left parietal. So it impacts the right side. So they do surgery, they hand it off to the robot. So the robot will do this micro sheer and then zap it. And then if and then that zap is to test if you have another seizure, that means if they cut again, you'll either die or become a vegetable.

::

Wade Lewis

And so so they hand that off. And for, you know, for as long as they could, they would cut it. Zap, cut, zap! Until I had another seizure on the operating room table, have like hour eight or something like that.

::

Pat McCalla

Wow.

::

Wade Lewis

my

::

Wade Lewis

researcher? So that was also this amazing make it quick.

::

Wade Lewis

because they thought it was a low grade glioma. They're like, hey, you don't want that. This was in like. So that happened like the week before Thanksgiving. And so now a couple weeks later, so middle of December, you know, early December. And they're like it's a low grade. They grow slow, so you're good. We can do surgery in the next, you know, later next year or, you know, early Q1.

::

Wade Lewis

And I was like, you know, I'm not

::

Wade Lewis

that type of guy who, you know, wants it when, you know, I like get my Christmas presents in October. So I said, let's go ahead and try it. And so they said, you know, sir,

::

Wade Lewis

can't be done. And I said, well, I got this God who just does stuff like this all.

::

Wade Lewis

It would be just like him to get me in. And so the lady said, Sir, I've been here 27 years. It's never happened. I said, Just try. And she said, Sure. She called me back the next day and she goes, You're going to be having surgery. She goes, It's not done yet, but she goes something that typically takes 3 to 4 weeks, took 48 minutes yesterday.

::

Wade Lewis

th,:

::

Pat McCalla

Christmas present

::

Wade Lewis

no

::

Wade Lewis

I told him, I said, I'm going to try and not get you death for your birthday.

::

Wade Lewis

So

::

Pat McCalla

you came through on that one, but

::

Pat McCalla

what did they find out?

::

Pat McCalla

And they go in and they do that

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah. You

::

Wade Lewis

Yes. I woke up and I felt amazing. Like it was like, honestly, like I've I've woken up, you know, worse from naps than that surgery.

::

Wade Lewis

Like

::

Pat McCalla

brain surgery and you wake up feeling amazing,

::

Wade Lewis

genuinely so. So hand to God.

::

Wade Lewis

turn to my wife. She's she's, you know, sleeping right there. I wake up and I go, my bed. I you know, I hope the surgery went well, but I feel amazing. So let's

::

Wade Lewis

get out of here and blow this popsicle stand and get a kindness out of burrito.

::

Wade Lewis

If the closest, you know, Filiberto was on the way home and she

::

Wade Lewis

burst into tears and just ran out of the room, I'm. I'm checking for surgery, Breath to see, like, you know what? What happened? And so she comes back in with the doctor. He had he had asked her, Hey, when your husband wakes, you know, come get me, because I kind of want to talk to you.

::

Wade Lewis

And so that's when that's when they came in and they said that, hey, it's not a low grade glioma, but it's a high grade glioma. It's it's a high it's it's a grade four glioblastoma.

::

Wade Lewis

so if the other one was in 98% or 88% survival rate, this one's in 98% morbidity rate within.

::

Wade Lewis

yeah. Within like 18 months is the, is the median for that one.

::

Pat McCalla

man.

::

Pat McCalla

what a emotional rollercoaster that would be because

::

Wade Lewis

you wake up, you just had a

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah.

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah.

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah. You

::

Wade Lewis

rate.

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah.

::

Pat McCalla

So what what did you guys do

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah, So

::

Wade Lewis

my doctor was phenomenal. His name is Echo Colby Funk. He's from Cameroon.

::

Wade Lewis

He. If you know who Francis Mangan, who is the UFC heavyweight champion, they grew up in the same village in Cameroon. Yeah, they're their moms are friends, you know, just, you know, really cool. So he came in, you know, told me the new diagnosis.

::

Wade Lewis

And and so I asked him, is there a door number two? And he said, is there a charcoal? And he goes, Nope. And I said, Well, then I say, we open up door number one and kick it as hard as we can straight in the mouth. And and he goes, he goes, honestly, he goes, You are going to be you are already my favorite patient.

::

Wade Lewis

, you know, I consider myself:

::

Wade Lewis

And so, like, I woke up from brain cancer. I was like, I guess this is the newest thing that I'm going to, you know, that I'm going to beat.

::

Wade Lewis

So.

::

Wade Lewis

So then I started doing chemo and radiation soon after that, but then got a got an infection in my surgical site, which I would have only found out we were traveling to to California for a work thing like I was still retired and stuff or I was I was out, but my team was doing something and they're like, Hey, will you fly out just for a party?

::

Wade Lewis

And I was like, Yeah. So my wife and I flew out and we were laying on sheets that were white. And so I look in the morning and I had this weird, you know, stuff on the pillow and it was from the surgical site. So I went back in and they were like, my gosh, so glad you got here in time.

::

Wade Lewis

Had you had waited a day,

::

Wade Lewis

you'd have died from the air, from the infection. So I had to go. So my bone flap, so they, they chorea, you know, they go in and do this, you know, that size. And so they popped it out and then they put it back in at the end. But everything had gotten so infected that my bone

::

Pat McCalla

many of us get to say.

::

Wade Lewis

yeah, my bone flabby.

::

Wade Lewis

And so so they took it out. They cut out everything that they could. And then I had to throw the bone flap away as well. And so then I was on a pick line for like six months.

::

Pat McCalla

throw your bone flap

::

Wade Lewis

a little

::

Wade Lewis

and now it's mesh that now it's a little mesh thing, you know, which I was like,

::

Pat McCalla

bone grow like, is

::

Wade Lewis

know, now it just stays there. So yeah, if

::

Pat McCalla

you have like a soft spot in the back of

::

Wade Lewis

So I haven't pushed hard enough to know how I do it all Yeah, but

::

Wade Lewis

maybe later. So.

::

Wade Lewis

Yep.

::

Wade Lewis

And just crazy when I get out, the doctor goes, Hey, so in all seriousness, it's better that you got the infection.

::

Wade Lewis

I'm like, What are you talking about? He goes, No, like it actually kicks up your immune system. And so for chemo and radiation, you'll be in a better place. And statistically, patients who get a an infection in their surgical site do better. And so I'm like, okay, So now I'm thinking, you know, thanking the Lord for, you know, for an infection, right?

::

Wade Lewis

So I had to pause chemo and radiation

::

Wade Lewis

while I had that infection until I could get my white blood cells up and then went back, did the did the maximum you could do for radiation. So I can't I can't do any more radiation.

::

Wade Lewis

when I finished I went in. So the day before surgery.

::

Pat McCalla

how long was that? Was that

::

Wade Lewis

would it take. Yeah, I think it was 27 treatments. Yeah. So this thing is six months of chemo and you know,

::

Pat McCalla

where you just did it, was it just kick in your butt like

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah,

::

Wade Lewis

you know, so it's where they say it's compounding. So each, each time you go in, it kind of zaps you and then drops you a little bit lower.

::

Wade Lewis

So, you know, at the end of the time, you know, you're kind of at the lowest. And the same thing with chemo. And so at the end of that period was, you know, was pretty rough. Wow. but I went in so the day before, so we've done funny Christmas cards for like a decade or so. And so the the day before we went in for surgery, we did our Christmas card that was WWE that year.

::

Wade Lewis

And so

::

Wade Lewis

I was a macho man. Randy Savage and I had two belts because I had skin cancer like 13 years ago. And so my second belt, you know, so I had two belts, one for each cancer, skin cancer and yep. And so went and

::

Wade Lewis

rang the bell in my Randy Randy Macho man outfit, you know.

::

Wade Lewis

And so all the doctors were blessed. Everyone was blessed by having this guy who was, you know, running around, you know, pumping everyone up in a Randy Savage, you know, outfit.

::

Pat McCalla

so? December 19th, you you come out of that first surgery, you had the first surgery

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah.

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah. Yeah.

::

Wade Lewis

Probably a mess or something like that, you know, so may of the next year.

::

Wade Lewis

finished all that and then, then I went back to work.

::

Wade Lewis

Did you? It was a yeah. So it was, it was really cool. My company,

::

Wade Lewis

Danish company, half a million employees, but just, you know, IAC great company. And they, they had made a position for me. I was the vice president of operations for North America. And so I used to have to say I had like $5 million signing authority

::

Wade Lewis

to where I could without.

::

Pat McCalla

you didn't have to go and get

::

Wade Lewis

call our CEO. I could write a $5 million check. And and so when they

::

Wade Lewis

came out, they said, hey, you know, like we met with legal he met with doctors who met with a bunch of people and they don't think that it would be wise for me to remain in that role.

::

Wade Lewis

He

::

Pat McCalla

have a

::

Pat McCalla

brain flap.

::

Wade Lewis

I don't I don't have a brain flap. Right.

::

Wade Lewis

And so

::

Wade Lewis

I totally understood it, you know, But it was one of those things. I'd been an operator since I was 21. It was the only job in, in the that one. I was only in one field my entire life and I only had one job operations.

::

Wade Lewis

Now, I started as a supervisor and then into as a vice president. But, you know, that's all I did was operations forever. And so they were like, Hey, can you train people? And I was like, Sure. But like, I don't I mean, like people go to school to train, you know? And so so I did that for a bit.

::

Wade Lewis

And I was I had the chance I was kind of mentoring this young woman from Denmark. She was one of our management trainees for years. And and she was like, Why are you still working? And then I was like, Well, because that's just what you do. And she's like, But like, have you talked to see? Like you probably qualify for disability, you know, like there's some different things.

::

Wade Lewis

Have you checked? And I was like, I have not thought once about, you know, and then and so that caused me to go home and talk to my wife about it, pray about it, and then go to the family about it. And so then I retired a couple months later.

::

Pat McCalla

man, what a journey.

::

Pat McCalla

did that change your thinking? Because again, I'm assuming I had a friend once who was diagnosed with cancer and told he was dying. And I remember he told me a story about when someone came to him and said, What does it feel like

::

Pat McCalla

knowing you're going to die?

::

Wade Lewis

yeah, This

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

::

Wade Lewis

One out of one

::

Pat McCalla

got to be something different. And I'm guess because I haven't been in this situation, there's still got to be something different

::

Pat McCalla

when you're told this is a 98% chance you're going to die from

::

Wade Lewis

this. Yeah. So what was, what was amazing was so my doctor, Dr. Fong Kim said hey, so we are so I split my time between treating patients and then coming up with a cure for this disease.

::

Wade Lewis

And we really think we're close. And so I'm asking you to he had just finished a white paper on essentially faith and that, you know, if you believe that you are going to live, you live longer, and if you believe that you're going to die, you die quick and

::

Wade Lewis

so he said, Yeah, yeah, yeah.

::

Wade Lewis

yeah, it was.

::

Wade Lewis

And so that was, you know, the first thing he told me and I said, you know, well, you know, I'm amen. And so I go, So you guys are close. And he goes, Yeah. And you go, So I'm going to put you on this drug cocktail. And I go, Drug cocktail? I go, That's what Magic Johnson was on, you know, So.

::

Wade Lewis

So, you know, then I go, Hey, so. So Magic was on a drug cocktail until they figured out how to cure it. And he

::

Pat McCalla

And for our audience, they may not know

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah.

::

Wade Lewis

Yep,

::

Wade Lewis

Everyone. yeah. Yep.

::

Pat McCalla

And so they put him on this drug cocktail

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah,

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah,

::

Wade Lewis

there. Yep.

::

Pat McCalla

were told they they had something similar

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah. Yeah.

::

Wade Lewis

So take this drug cocktail and we'll keep working on your thing. And then you can be the Magic Johnson of glioblastoma, but minus the adultery. So and so

::

Wade Lewis

That was and is my belief until this second right now. And continues to believe is is I believe that the doctors will get it and I will be an old man who had a cancer scare when I was 40 something years old. Yeah. And the thing they do not

::

Pat McCalla

on it.

::

Pat McCalla

And you're on a drug cocktail

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah.

::

Wade Lewis

It's just weird things.

::

Wade Lewis

So it none of them are like cancer treating. They just put my body in the best place. So, like, one of them is, like, for diabetics because it does something with blood sugar. And so tumors feed off sugar. And so having less blood sugar overall is good. Netherlands. Yeah. Anti antibiotic that they just say, hey for whatever reason this keeps people in a better place.

::

Wade Lewis

So so I'm doing that the drug that he just called me a couple of weeks ago and said the drug we just tested on on a bunch of mice killed all of the tumors and all of the female mice and half of the tumors in the male mice. And so I said, all right. So that proves that, you know, men are more stubborn than women, you know, and and that you need to get back in the office

::

Wade Lewis

And so he said, yeah, like we are working nonstop up. And so he goes, So I love I love calling you and giving you good news because then you pump me up and then I run back to the lab and say, Hey, wait, Louis is, you know, is doing great, but he wants to see his daughter walk down the aisle.

::

Wade Lewis

So guys, get back to it.

::

Pat McCalla

old is your daughter?

::

Wade Lewis

17. 17? Yeah. And then my boys are 21 and 23. Yeah.

::

Pat McCalla

So when we met for coffee, we were talking about that because we were talking about how amazing it is having adult children. I have adult children.

::

Pat McCalla

You

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah.

::

Wade Lewis

life.

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah,

::

Wade Lewis

that. Yeah.

::

Wade Lewis

yeah. You

::

Wade Lewis

ne. So my son would have been:

::

Wade Lewis

13. And so at 13,

::

Wade Lewis

17 and 19, all your kids still think you're an idiot.

::

Wade Lewis

And so I'm sitting there and I'm like,

::

Pat McCalla

where they're going.

::

Pat McCalla

That's pretty smart.

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah. And so now for years, you know, for,

::

Wade Lewis

you know, my, my kids are both,

::

Wade Lewis

in the, you know, profession, all world, and they're asking me for job advice, My friends, they're hiring and stuff like that.

::

Wade Lewis

And they're like, you actually do have value. And my father and my 17 year old's just picking that up in the last six months or so. Yeah, that's

::

Pat McCalla

funny, because if you would have passed away on their night, they would have always been like, We love Dad,

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah, what a dumb dumb. That

::

Wade Lewis

guy And

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah, you're a smart guy. So you told

::

Pat McCalla

me, though, when we met that first time

::

Pat McCalla

that in some ways you look back and you're glad this happened because it changed the trajectory of your life in some way. So. So speaking of that,

::

Unknown

Hey, from your No gray Areas team, we just want to say thank you so much for listening. And if you're loving this episode, would you just take a moment and leave us a review and rating on whatever platform you're listening from? If you're watching on YouTube, make sure you hit that subscribe button so you don't miss out on the new podcast episodes that drop every other Wednesday by leaving a review and subscribing, you help others discover our podcasts inspirational messages to effectuate positive change in their lives.

::

Unknown

Okay, let's jump back in to this episode.

::

Pat McCalla

that in some ways you look back and you're glad this happened because it changed the trajectory of your life in some way. So. So speaking of that,

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah.

::

Wade Lewis

And this is this is one of the hardest things for people to believe. So I wouldn't take brain cancer away.

::

Wade Lewis

I am a better father, husband, friend, cousin, brother, everything right now. And and I wasn't trending in that direction like I had really.

::

Wade Lewis

the world is tough, you know, I mean, like the world is tough and the business world and so and for me,

::

Wade Lewis

I had believed too much of the, of the Western you know, philosophy of, you know, hey, this is you got to go do the most stuff and accomplish and get, you know, get to that highest place on the mountain.

::

Wade Lewis

You wanted to be president, you know, when you were when you were a little kid. And now, now it's, you know, got to be CEO of the biggest company you can find. And and so I look back and I say, Lord, thank you so much for, you know, allowing this brain cancer. But for it to not take me because the last four years have been the best four years of my life.

::

Pat McCalla

Yeah.

::

Pat McCalla

What were some of the things that changed for you? I mean, you hinted on one of them. Just your priorities, right?

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah.

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah.

::

Pat McCalla

would be some other things that changed where you could like? That is a that's a huge statement to go. I thank God for my brain cancer. I thank God that I didn't die from it.

::

Pat McCalla

But.

::

Pat McCalla

what else changed?

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah. So I come home

::

Wade Lewis

From the hospital, and we had a room in our house. It was called the Spotify Rule. And. And it was just any time that we're eating, especially breakfast cereal, that sort of thing. I don't need to hear you horse chomping, so just put Spotify on and we'll just have music playing for breakfast.

::

Wade Lewis

Right? You know, you're not a you know, you're not a horse. I don't need to hear your horse chomp. Right?

::

Wade Lewis

so I'm shuffling out the first day after getting home and the kids are out there eating, eating cereal or whatever. And and so I sit down and then I start eating. And then one of them notices that, you know, the Spotify is not on and they go, I hate that, so sorry.

::

Wade Lewis

Well, hop up and get Spotify on. And then I was like, no, no, no, hold on. The Spotify rules dead. Because if if I can hear you chop and you can hear me chomp, then everything else passed. That is gravy. And I so that rule is dead. And Spotify was even my customer at the time and I was like you said, Spotify rules dead.

::

Wade Lewis

We can still subscribe to it, but it doesn't need to be on because if and then the same thing couple weeks later I used to wear.

::

Pat McCalla

So just really

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah.

::

Wade Lewis

You know,

::

Wade Lewis

Same thing as their hair.

::

Wade Lewis

used to complain every time I walk into the front bath and my kids would come their hair in there and there would be all this hair in the front saying, right.

::

Wade Lewis

And I'm like, Come on, you know? And then I walk in. I'm like, Whoa. Like my kids live with me. They're alive. I'm like, They have full heads of hair. I have four, you know? No, I'll be picking this up and cleaning it and not saying a word to make me feel bad. Yeah, sorry about that. So.

::

Pat McCalla

So you were going to say what else? Than a couple of weeks later, something

::

Wade Lewis

No. Yeah, that was a

::

Wade Lewis

couple weeks later. And I'm in the front bathroom looking at this sink of hair, and I'm like, no, I will, you know, never again say, you know, complain about that. So it was it was just those things that you take for granted. And so it really is. So you talked about that, the death thing earlier.

::

Wade Lewis

So 180,000 people a day die globally, more or less, and then 150 people a year die from coconuts falling and hitting them on their head. And so like, so you get this and so that's it. Your buddy asked the great question because I when I went home and started talking to people about my situation, you know, I was like, well, I mean, technically you could die before me, you know, like just because, you know, a doctor told me that, like, you know, 180,000 people a day die in 150, you know, a year from coconuts.

::

Wade Lewis

And so they did everything. They watched what they what they ate.

::

Wade Lewis

they saved up the money. They took the time off. They did everything. They sit down, they order their mai tai, you know, and then boom, you know, and they're talking to their maker. And so for me it was like, yeah, like less has changed. Like really less has changed than I really thought.

::

Wade Lewis

Because the only thing that's changed for me was, you know, now I have a little bit of proprioception. I've got to I have to watch stairs when I walk up and down stairs, wherever they cut in my brain,

::

Wade Lewis

it disconnected that and I can't get it back. I've been

::

Pat McCalla

it like a balancing? Like

::

Wade Lewis

So it's not balance.

::

Wade Lewis

It's actually so

::

Wade Lewis

My right side, the impacted thing, my impacted side. So I don't know how high my right foot off the ground right now. It could be an inch, it could be, you know, whatever. And so so stairs. So like the first time I went to do a stair, I kicked the stair like really hard and I was like, wow, you know, and then over and over and I'm like, well.

::

Wade Lewis

And so it just doesn't

::

Pat McCalla

has to actually watch

::

Wade Lewis

I have to watch my foot. So and I've got a I've got a friend who, when she had glioblastoma surgery, she is actually she does weightlifting, competitive weightlifting. She has to watch her her right arm like go go gadget arms. So she looks at it and said, fire, fire

::

Wade Lewis

as she's bench pressing.

::

Wade Lewis

And it still to this day, you know, so like there are some things

::

Pat McCalla

just a little side note

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah.

::

Wade Lewis

::

Wade Lewis

and we can

::

Wade Lewis

yeah. I don't know

::

Wade Lewis

God, my

::

Wade Lewis

Yep.

::

Pat McCalla

until it's taken

::

Wade Lewis

from me. But my the first thing that I found out that was lost was teeth brushing. So I'm in the hospital. I go to brush my teeth after surgery, and. And I go and I just, like, rack the side of my, you know, the side of my cheek or whatever with my toothbrush and I'm like and then I try and go back and I like, slam my gums on this side.

::

Wade Lewis

And I'm like, what is happening? And so, you know, I. Long story short,

::

Wade Lewis

I got into this thing called mere box training where, you know. Yeah, yeah, yep, yep. Which is

::

Wade Lewis

you know, for veterans and that sort of thing. And so so I had to go and watch myself brush my teeth until my new neural pathways were connected.

::

Wade Lewis

And then it's, you know, then it's back. So it was like riding a bike

::

Pat McCalla

done with that more boxing, which is fascinating is this tell me if I'm wrong on

::

Wade Lewis

about,

::

Wade Lewis

Yep,

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah,

::

Pat McCalla

but then

::

Pat McCalla

they'll scratch. But it's the other

::

Wade Lewis

Yep.

::

Pat McCalla

But your brain thinks it's scratching the fan.

::

Wade Lewis

Yep. Yeah. Yeah.

::

Wade Lewis

It's. It's nuts. And so. So this arm.

::

Wade Lewis

wasn't able to do this and coming out of surgery, you know, it was like it was off. Right. You know, And so. So I had to stick this one in the box and then do it with this one. But then it looks like I'm doing it with my right hand, you know, which is my bad hand.

::

Wade Lewis

And so my brain's now connecting. So after a couple of weeks, a mirror box, I'm back. I'm right, you know, like and so, yeah, again, for me, I'm like, so not only like how complex our bodies are, but, you know, how able to, you know, to be healed,

::

Pat McCalla

Yeah. For sure. Well so that was the priorities was a big difference for you,

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah. Like,

::

Pat McCalla

just like

::

Pat McCalla

you thought you were going to be needed to be president and then if it's not president then it's the CEO or whatever's the highest. And that just wasn't a big priority for you anymore.

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah, it was one of those things too, where I looked at, I then I then kind of really dropped to

::

Wade Lewis

the verse in James where it talks about you don't, don't say that I'm going to do this or that tomorrow.

::

Wade Lewis

I'll say, If the Lord wills, you know, I'll do this or that tomorrow. And so for me, I was like, okay, so what is guarantee for Wade Louis? And it's today. I mean, it's right now it's this, you know. And so I started like just going and just looking at my day and saying like, Lord, if you gave me a, you know, another day, here's what I'll do with it now, and I'll be intentional with every meeting.

::

Wade Lewis

And so I'll, you know, sit there and before I go out to have breakfast, I'll pray about breakfast and or bring something, you know, for the kids. And I had a conversation about it, you know, And so it was just is very intentional

::

Wade Lewis

yeah I was so caught up

::

Pat McCalla

That is well I'm sure if you're working like the level that you were in a company like that, you're always thinking of the future and

::

Wade Lewis

ten years out, we

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah. And

::

Wade Lewis

Yes.

::

Wade Lewis

and it took years. There is something like I like being in the boardroom

::

Wade Lewis

I like being having power and being a power broker.

::

Wade Lewis

I like making decisions. I like, you know,

::

Wade Lewis

And so with that, you know comes this, you know, you only focus, you know on, on the, you know, on the big things and then you know even Andy Stanley only do what only you can do right you know. Okay well then if I'm this guy up here, you know, then I can only do these big strategic things.

::

Wade Lewis

And so, you know, and then it was like, well, no, like, that was just something you were telling yourself. You can also go on a walk with your wife and that can be the most you know, that that can be as satisfying as, you know, as buying a new company.

::

Pat McCalla

Wade, one of the things that when we had coffee together the first time when we were talking and I think you can help our audience with this one too,

::

Pat McCalla

we all have a friend, family member, someone that's close to us that goes through something really difficult or they're given some really bad news, and they're in this grieving process to help us

::

Pat McCalla

understand what to say and what not

::

Wade Lewis

to say or

::

Pat McCalla

what what, what was helpful or what was not helpful for you. Because,

::

Pat McCalla

sometimes people don't say anything

::

Wade Lewis

you

::

Wade Lewis

happen. I did,

::

Wade Lewis

and it was one of those things, too, where, you know, fast forward through the through the situation, I totally get it, you know, because I had had I had had things in my life where I didn't know what to say and I didn't want to make it worse.

::

Wade Lewis

So I didn't say anything, not knowing that that would actually make it worse. And so

::

Wade Lewis

have had four best friends since I was the last edition when I was ten. So in the fourth grade. So these I've known him since fourth grade. And so so I

::

Wade Lewis

had these guys that were able to come in and so we kind of all went through it together and, and we had the Book of Joe to tell us, you know, what not to do.

::

Wade Lewis

And so so my biggest thing was like, I knew all the Bible verses, you know, you know, wait, have hope that you think, I don't know that. Do you think I. And so, like, so the only thing that Jobs Friends should have done, you know, was come in and in sackcloth and ashes, just sit there and just be there.

::

Wade Lewis

And if and if I want to say something, I'll say something, you know. And if I want to ask you guys, I'll ask you a question. But other than that, just sit there, just mourn. You know, there's no Tim Keller always says no pat answers. Don't you know? You know,

::

Wade Lewis

this is big and, you know,

::

Pat McCalla

thing, isn't it?

::

Wade Lewis

gosh. You know what? Just, you know. Do you not think I'm trusting in, you know, like, of course I am, you know? But,

::

Wade Lewis

there's also this what happened, you know, like that, you know that Heidi's, you know, like just trying to figure out, you know, get your bearings. And so during that time, it's it's nice to be able to, you know, just do that.

::

Wade Lewis

And then some of the things that, you know, the well-meaning, you know, people try and do. So the meal train right. Which is probably a benefit for most people. A friend of mine, unfortunately, just lost a son a week ago, a week and a half ago on New Year's Eve, 14 year old son. Now he's he's yeah, he's with Christ.

::

Wade Lewis

And so it's it's you know, but

::

Wade Lewis

meal train works perfect for them and they felt so blessed. He was telling me we you know, it's such a blessing for us. My wife's a vegetarian. The doctors told me to come out and do keto and then I had three teenagers. So each time a family was trying to bring us something, it was it was like this crazy, like, you know, it was hard for them.

::

Wade Lewis

And then they were like, apologetic sometimes, like, I've never cookie dough, I've never done this, I've never cooked it, you know? And so it was this, you know,

::

Pat McCalla

it. Be like, I can tell you've never cooked

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah, I can tell you.

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah.

::

Wade Lewis

know, I actually would have been better would just be, you know, a maybe a gift card somewhere, you know, or, or just a conversation.

::

Wade Lewis

But there were just things. And so, you know, for us, as we've processed and helped people through sorrow, you want to do the platinum rule as opposed to the golden rule. So the golden rule is do other, you know, do unto others as you would, you know, have done to you, you know, and was like, okay, cool. But but the platinum rule is do unto others as they would want done to themselves, you know?

::

Wade Lewis

And so like, so you have to be empathetic and say, okay, what does this family need not what does my family need? But, you know, if I were them, what would I need? And so it's a very different question.

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah.

::

Wade Lewis

parents,

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah, yeah, yeah. That that's the thing. Yeah. And so

::

Wade Lewis

even text that. So any text that I send to somebody, in in trauma and who's hurting, there's no questions asked. I'm just leaving this for you. And I want to be clear. You don't ever need to respond to you don't even have to heart this. You don't have to do any.

::

Wade Lewis

I am. I'm just trying to lay something beautiful and sweet at your feet that if you ever get hungry or thirsty or anything, you can pick up and eat. But I don't want to force anything on you.

::

Pat McCalla

We had someone on our podcast about a year and a half ago whose wife had committed

::

Wade Lewis

suicide,

::

Wade Lewis

child.

::

Wade Lewis

wow.

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah. Yeah.

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah.

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah.

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah, You

::

Pat McCalla

did. And, you know, I suppose it depends on where you're at in someone's life on whether you have that right. But he told the story of a friend of his that gives me emotional telling it, but pulled into his driveway that that day and said I texted him, said I'm down in my car.

::

Pat McCalla

I'm going to stay overnight in my car

::

Pat McCalla

and if you need anything tonight, just come out.

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah,

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah. Saying,

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah, yeah. No, that's so powerful.

::

Wade Lewis

And it's hard because we always want to say something. We that's. That's why you have to go to Toastmasters to. To cut out your filler words and all that. Because uncomfortable silence is the worst. Yeah, we think it's the worst until, like, you're in it and then may I could just sit in my garage with another friend and just cry, not say anything.

::

Wade Lewis

And just with him, they're like, I just meant the world to me.

::

Pat McCalla

that happened with you

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

::

Wade Lewis

there was one day where nobody answered, so, you know, you have great friends, but they all have jobs, right? And so I had I had called, so it was at the end of chemo and radiation and I'm, I'm at the lowest place that I've been in this entire journey.

::

Wade Lewis

So again, surgery was, you know, came out feeling amazing and so is chemo and radiation that really took me to the to the bottom. And it was, you know, on the last day. So just the worst feeling. I call and all my friends are busy, which again, they all have jobs. Right? And and then yeah, it was, you know so I'm calling everyone nothing and I'm just as I'm throwing up from the chemo, you know, and I'm in my garage and, and then all of a sudden I, I pick up the Bible and I start reading, I mean, the Psalms.

::

Wade Lewis

And and then I close my eyes and I have kind of this vision of being in this cave. And and the cave was completely dark. And I was just walking and I had my hands on the side of the cave to make sure that I, you know, wasn't running into anything. And then all of a sudden I touched, you know, and I go back there and I and I touch this this thing and I taste it, and it's the sweetest honey that I'd ever tasted in my entire life.

::

Wade Lewis

And and I felt a piece and a comfort. I went from the lowest place in my life to the sweetest, you know, thing that's happened to me in years. You know, just, you know that quick. And so it was. Yeah. The

::

Pat McCalla

other end of none of your friends.

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah. Yeah. Not being able to pick up. And so it's one of those things too, where, you know,

::

Pat McCalla

place of solitude

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah, yeah. You know, And so, you know, friends are great, but they're also not always there.

::

Wade Lewis

and so having, you know, having something else is a, is a cornerstone, something to lean on is great.

::

Pat McCalla

Well, way to wrap up our conversation when we talk about the power and complexity

::

Wade Lewis

of your choice,

::

Pat McCalla

what would you say to, to me, our audience?

::

Pat McCalla

and I'm going to use your words

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah,

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah. Yeah.

::

Pat McCalla

What would you suggest to us?

::

Pat McCalla

So we don't have that. But

::

Wade Lewis

yeah,

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah. Yeah. So it really is. So one of the things that I kind of,

::

Wade Lewis

used to say even before this, you say all of life is a screening tool. meaning when somebody, when somebody does something that's, you know, like everything is a screening tool. And so, so for me looking, you know, looking at this after like it, it stripped down identity.

::

Wade Lewis

Like for me, it just took me to what is what are you living your eulogy essentially. So unfortunately, I, I eulogized four grandparents and my mom before the age of 30. And so, you know, a you know, a lot of being around death and, you know, and that sort of thing. And so so after this thing, it was like so I had spent time making up.

::

Wade Lewis

And so because there were a couple of things, you know, so relationships that I had to go back and fix an old boss that maybe I quit the wrong way or something like that. And so I spent like the first six months to a year after diagnosis of, you know, making up for those things. And then I wrote on my whiteboard, living your eulogy, you know, to where like, you don't want to have to, you know, fix a bunch of stuff.

::

Wade Lewis

And so

::

Wade Lewis

we're have each day yeah. Living your eulogy and so living it to where like I want that said about me when I die and so like well then how you how do you do that. You Have to live it. You lit it. You literally can't have a eulogy. So I had to lie in a eulogy that I did because one of my grandparents, I won't say who was was pretty rough

::

Wade Lewis

and so

::

Pat McCalla

A lot of lying at funerals

::

Wade Lewis

yeah.

::

Wade Lewis

it's it's really rough, you know I mean it was it was rough. And so

::

Wade Lewis

my grandfather there came up to me afterwards and said he had divorced her, by the way, in the seventies. So you don't you know, I mean, so that says something, right. So, so anyways, I had to cut all the stories off. So I'm telling stories about her and then I had to cut the story off before she,

::

Wade Lewis

grabbed a newspaper and hit me in the face, you know, and stuff like that.

::

Wade Lewis

And so I come down from the eulogy and he goes,

::

Wade Lewis

Boy, those were the most amazing words anyone has said about your grandfather. Most of them weren't true, but you did what you had to do. And like and that was like, I didn't like that. Like I was like probably 25 at that. And I was like, very horrible.

::

Wade Lewis

And

::

Wade Lewis

so after brain cancer, it's just been like this now live each day to where like if you died at the end of the day, you'd be like, yeah, now that was a I died on a high note. That was the greatest way that I could have spent one

::

Wade Lewis

day.

::

Pat McCalla

Yeah. Wait, I think that's so good. I had heard a while ago that

::

Pat McCalla

everybody will boiled down to about one sentence. Given enough time after their

::

Wade Lewis

death to

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. My great,

::

Wade Lewis

name. Yep,

::

Pat McCalla

But it won't be long after I die where my wife will say, Pat, he was such a

::

Wade Lewis

you know, my

::

Wade Lewis

a Yeah.

::

Wade Lewis

is. Yeah.

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah, right. Yeah, yeah.

::

Pat McCalla

you want your wife to say about you and then

::

Pat McCalla

treat her in such a way that that's what she's going to say, Right.

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah.

::

Wade Lewis

That's it.

::

Wade Lewis

powerful.

::

Wade Lewis

That is so good.

::

Pat McCalla

Well, man, Wade, thank you so much for sharing your some of your story in it, man. It fits just perfectly with what we talk about, with no gray areas and living our life with the power and complexity of human choice,

::

Pat McCalla

we're going to jump into the to choose an ally.

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah.

::

Wade Lewis

yes. Yes, bro. When we

::

Pat McCalla

do our podcast, I got to ask you about

::

Wade Lewis

Yes.

::

Wade Lewis

would have the same thing. Yeah.

::

Wade Lewis

Yes, very quickly.

::

Wade Lewis

So

::

Wade Lewis

kids from age 15, 16 on, you have to be in school working or volunteering at least 40 hours a week. You can't soup up a civic. We say you to save 50% of your paychecks that don't get touched until you launch. And we'll give you a car, you know, from you know from this stage to this age.

::

Wade Lewis

But we want you to go out and fail as many times as you need to to to to figure out, you know, what you want to do, all that sort of thing. But we said we want you to to fail and we want it to ruin your day, your week, or even your year, but not your life. And so in that lean startup type thing.

::

Wade Lewis

And so we just, you know, we start doing that with the with the kids where they come in and be like, you know, dad, I kind of think I want to do fast food, you know? And I'm like, you know, so here, you know, here are the things about fast food. You know, I you know, you know, I doubt I'll say, you know, okay, sounds good, you know, and then and then let them do it and then and then when they come back, well, remember, we don't we don't leave one job without having the next job, you know.

::

Wade Lewis

And so you if you have to work 40 hours a week and all this stuff, so what, what are you going to do? gosh, I shouldn't have done this. okay. Well, you know, so you failed at this and then you want to move forward. And so it is they hated it when they were young they my my 23 year old couldn't stand.

::

Wade Lewis

He got his first paycheck and he goes, it was $68. And he goes, he goes, says 60. So I'm going to come up with 30 bucks that, you know, this is insane, you know, all this stuff. So he's 23. He bought a house last year at 22, paid off car, you know, like all this stuff. And he came and he said, Dad, I am he you you should have started that when we were five with our you know and so it was a so this is very cool thing to wear.

::

Wade Lewis

it's it's it's been a long you know how long is that. Seven, seven, eight years we've been doing this.

::

Wade Lewis

but it's it's produced some good fruit. That's fine I love the fact

::

Pat McCalla

of, of in doing that you letting your kids know like it's okay to fail like we're going to fail in life. But it's that whole that adage of fail fast and fail forward,

::

Wade Lewis

fail lean.

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah

::

Wade Lewis

What a

::

Wade Lewis

yeah, because you're loved.

::

Wade Lewis

You're not what you're producing today, like you're loved.

::

Wade Lewis

We just want them to feel this. Hey, you're loved. And so go out and fail because your failure doesn't take away from what your mother and I think of you. You know, all it does is reduce something that, you know, you didn't want to do or you now know that you do want to do. You know, whatever it is, you know, you've learned something.

::

Wade Lewis

And so and if you can do that in a safe environment, it's really fun.

::

Pat McCalla

of the best parenting advice and I've heard a lot of parenting

::

Wade Lewis

advice. I'm

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah, you know what's funny is so when they move out,

::

Wade Lewis

they get all their money and they move out and we've told them, Hey, if you have to move back in, it actually bumps up to 75% of your savings because 50 obviously wasn't enough because you're back in my bed

::

Wade Lewis

and you're back in my house.

::

Wade Lewis

So, yeah, I

::

Pat McCalla

like it. Okay, my friend,

::

Wade Lewis

All right.

::

Pat McCalla

It's always fun at the end. It's ironic

::

Pat McCalla

because we're no

::

Wade Lewis

gray area. I want you to

::

Wade Lewis

All right.

::

Pat McCalla

run. I'm on a winning streak

::

Wade Lewis

Okay.

::

Wade Lewis

the first thing is, when I was ten years old, I won a life size Voltron.

::

Wade Lewis

Remember? Voltron? Yeah.

::

Wade Lewis

I have also had to yield to a an F-18 fighter jet. And I once had a roommate who was in the Italian mafia

::

Pat McCalla

those are good ones.

::

Pat McCalla

I'm going to say the third one is true.

::

Wade Lewis

The third one's true. True. You Mafia is true. Yeah.

::

Pat McCalla

I don't know why. I was just like, if there's anybody who's going to have a mafia roommate, it's going to be wait

::

Wade Lewis

yeah. Okay,

::

Pat McCalla

so now I got a:

::

Pat McCalla

I think that you had to. You had to yield to an F-18.

::

Wade Lewis

I did.

::

Wade Lewis

I did. You Okay. You're still. You're still going? Yeah. Yeah,

::

Pat McCalla

I went with that one because that's just. That's

::

Pat McCalla

I had to because my son's in the Marine Corps

::

Wade Lewis

Yep.

::

Wade Lewis

It's so funny.

::

Wade Lewis

It, so we pulled up to a four way stop. It was at NASA Edwards Air Force Base, NASA Dryden out there that was my account when I was like 26 or something like that

::

Wade Lewis

and pull up to a four way stop.

::

Wade Lewis

And I got there just before the F-18. But in flight line training, you learn you always have to yield to that. And so when we pulled up, I motioned them, you know, here, go. And he just starts

::

Wade Lewis

dying, laughing in this cockpit, You know. Yeah, I you

::

Wade Lewis

go to immediately to jail if you don't, you know. So yeah, yeah, yeah,

::

Pat McCalla

That is amazing. Anybody that has not been on military bases, they don't know, like, that's just part of life.

::

Pat McCalla

On a military basis, you come up to a flight line and

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah. That's jet

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

::

Pat McCalla

kind of crazy, But.

::

Pat McCalla

Well, Wade, thanks so much for

::

Pat McCalla

sharing your story. Really, really appreciated having you on here today.

::

Wade Lewis

Thanks so much for having me, Pat.

::

Wade Lewis

Yeah, Really appreciate everything that that you in the podcast are doing for for people

::

Wade Lewis

who need it.

::

Pat McCalla

Yeah.

::

Host

What a moving episode.

::

Host

Thank you for joining us on today's episode with Wade Lewis.

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Host

May Wade's incredible journey inspire you to embrace gratitude and intentional living in your own life.

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Host

We'll see you next time. And in the meantime, remember

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Host

that every day you wake up

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Host

is a gift.

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