Why Your Man Shuts Down When You Try to Talk & What to Do Instead | FT: DR. Chris David
CONNECT WITH CHARLENE
On Instagram @mscharlenebyars ([https://www.instagram.com/mscharlenebyars]
On YouTube @chosentraining ([https://www.youtube.com/@lovestorieswithcharlenebyars]
Work with me HERE ([https://charlenebyars.com/](https://charlenebyars.com/))
CONNECT WITH CHRIS DAVID
On Instagram @evolvedbychris (https://www.instagram.com/evolvedbychris?igsh=dmpya2pwNmNqeTdp)
Work With Me Here: https://linktr.ee/evolvedbychris?utm_source=ig&utm_medium=social&utm_content=link_in_bio&fbclid=PAZXh0bgNhZW0CMTEAc3J0YwZhcHBfaWQPOTM2NjE5NzQzMzkyNDU5AAGnjXAnZgX9oxHKwhMERoqK6npC7-Q0YGS0suMCBsKXtusB1v_-ak8TlVB9VD4_aem_k254pW6ZWslcuWxdOfOkzg
Relationship and attachment coach Chris joins the Love Stories podcast for one of the most eye-opening conversations yet.
After a tumultuous 14-year marriage, a painful divorce, and years of studying human behavior, Chris built a practice helping people understand why their relationships keep failing, and what to actually do about it.
In this episode, he breaks down the real difference between an avoidant man and a man who's just not that into you, why communication alone won't save your relationship, how men and women bond completely differently, the 70-30 rule for emotionally charged conversations, why you should give your man a problem to solve instead of making him the problem, and how attachment styles are fully correctable.
We Cover in this whole Episode:
0:00 — Intro & teaser clips
1:30 — Host welcomes Chris; his mission explained
3:00 — How Chris got into relationship coaching
5:00 — Marrying young at 26: chemistry mistaken for love
8:00 — Mr. Nice Guy syndrome: never saying no
12:00 — Shame wounds in men and what drives people-pleasing
16:00 — Childhood, Catholic upbringing & performative love
20:00 — Why traditional marriage counseling often fails
24:00 — The affairs, the explosion, and staying another 10 years
28:00 — Post-divorce: 5 years of dating around the world
33:00 — Meeting his current partner: friendship first
37:00 — What was different this time: mindset shift
41:00 — Avoidant vs. just not that into you — the key difference
45:00 — Dismissive avoidant explained: the "perfect family" facade
49:00 — The four types of memory & emotional unavailability
53:00 — Attachment is fully correctable — here's how
57:00 — How men and women bond differently: oxytocin vs. vasopressin
1:01:00 — How to let a woman express herself without shutting down
1:05:00 — Give him a problem to solve, not make him the problem
1:10:00 — The 70-30 rule for difficult conversations
1:14:00 — Vasopressin, acts of service & why men need to feel needed
1:18:00 — The 3 A's: attention, affection, affirmations
1:21:00 — How to work with Chris / closing resources
1:24:00 — Final message: only one reason a relationship truly can't work
1:26:00 — Outro & subscribe call to action
If you've ever felt unheard, disconnected, or stuck in the same relationship patterns, this episode will change the way you see yourself and your partner.
