In this episode, I'm sharing my personal journey of balancing motherhood entrepreneurship, and making hard decisions. I reflect on the tough decisions I've made, emphasizing the importance of identifying actions that lead to personal growth and cherished memories, even if they seem challenging at first.

Tech frustrations are a universal experience, and I've had my fair share. I encourage you to embrace discomfort and evolve through these hurdles because they're an essential part of your journey. When it comes to making choices amidst hardships, I stress the need for a problem-solver mindset and making decisions that align with your goals, no matter how tough it may be. Prioritizing self-care and personal growth is vital, even in the face of adversity.

Lastly, I delve into personal growth through perseverance, from conquering challenging hikes to facing personal struggles. I'll show you how vulnerability can be a powerful tool for overcoming hardships. Join me!

What you'll hear in this episode:

[0:00] Balancing motherhood and personal goals.

[1:25] Overcoming obstacles and pursuing goals despite difficulty.

[5:40] Overcoming tech frustrations and embracing imperfection.

[6:55] Overcoming hardships and making choices.

[11:20] Pushing through hardships and personal growth.

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0:00

When I went to college, I knew it was going to be hard. When I started working at 14, and I didn't college, I had three jobs on top of school, all these different decisions that I've made that were hard in the moment. But it didn't mean I shouldn't do it. And on the other end of it, I have a result I've become a different person, I've had an opportunity arise because of it, it's led me to where I've been able to be something I've been able to create exists. Welcome to mama has goals, your weekly reminder that you shouldn't have to sacrifice your dreams to take on the role of mom. I'm Kelsey Smith, mom of two boys, wife, an entrepreneur who's passionate about helping other moms current and aspiring to reimagine mom life. I'm bringing you the resources, support and relatability to debunk that limiting belief that you may have about your ability to achieve your goals while raising a human. We're covering everything from mom guilt, marriage, relationships, careers, finances, mental health, physical health, you name it, your life doesn't have to fully shift once you become a mom, you can have it all. And we'll show you how.

1:26

The other week, I just had so many things going on, it was a tech issue in the app that was just ongoing, it didn't feel like I could get fixed, I wasn't feeling good. We had a bunch of things on our calendar that were great, but just taking up hours that we felt like we didn't already have. And I caught myself in this moment where it just kind of stopped and said, Just because something's hard, doesn't mean you shouldn't do it. And it brought me back to all these different decisions that I've made throughout my life and my goals and my journeys, where something was hard. And I chose to do it. And on the other end of it was an amazing experience a learning and opportunity that I wouldn't have had otherwise. And I caught myself realizing that whether it was committing to go to a friend's activity, wedding barbecue, whatever it was, or choosing to launch a phone app, when I had no idea where it was going to take me choosing to launch a podcast, no idea where it was going to take me becoming a bomb, doing all of the different things that maybe I've chosen to do, or you can see yourself in as well. And in the moment, it was going to be hard. I think back even when I went to college, like I knew it was going to be hard. When I started working at 14. And in college, I had three jobs on top of oil time school, all these different decisions that I've made that were hard in the moment. But it didn't mean I shouldn't do it. And on the other end of it, I have a result I've become a different person, I've had an opportunity arise because of it. It's led me to where I've been able to be or something I've been able to create that wouldn't exist otherwise. And so I want you to ask yourself, what is something that you're not doing? Either at all, or you're not allowing yourself to even begin, or you're not doing it to the best of your ability? Because it's hard. And the biggest thing that I see people do when it comes to their goals is they quit too soon. They quit before they even had the opportunity to prove to themselves that on the other side a hard was what they wanted. And you may look at something table surface and say, That looks really hard. I don't know if it's worth it. And sometimes it's not. Sometimes you really can look at something and say this just is not worth the effort that needs to go into it. But there's other times where it's so worth it. Now I want to steal your example where I've caught myself thinking about this is creating something with my kids, whether it's an art project or activity, or I was actually thinking about this in the moment with a baking project of these little cute things it was going to make for the holidays that I saw online somewhere. And what I noticed is there was a part of me that was like, Is it even worth the effort? Is it worth the effort to create those and to be honest, in many ways? No. Like when we see these cute little Pinterest meals that we can create. Sometimes it's not, it's not worth the activity. But then you can pull back the layers of that and I realized, okay, it's not that expensive to get the different materials for it. It's gonna create an activity for me to do with the kids. It's a way to build memories. It's engaging different parts of their brain and learning and senses. And they're gonna have fun, they're gonna think it's silly, they're gonna think it's cute. Do So is it worth it? In many ways it is also. And there's not anyone that can tell you if something is worth it or not, but you get to make that decision. And again, using this activity example, whether it's like baking or an art activity, no one else can tell you if it's worth it for you to do that with yourself or the kids or anything else. Just like going after your goals, only you're going to know if it's worth it. Only you're going to know if the effort that you're going to put in towards that thing, even when it's really hard is worth it. And as I was thinking back to these tech issues I was having last week, I realized that it's so worth it. there in that moment. Am I so frustrated that I don't know how to fix every single tech code app issue that comes up? Yeah, but neither does the founder of the other big platforms that we use on a regular basis. And that's part of the journey and part of the process. And I learned through these things. And you guys are such a great community just saying, hey, it's cool, we got you. And it's always something so little that people don't even notice otherwise. But it's something that I'll notice something that is frustrating me or that I just wish was working because I want it to be perfect. Again, these other big platforms don't work perfect all the time. These people that you see creating success or accomplishing big goals, maybe celebrities or people you look up to, they've had failures, too. They've had things that they've set up against that they've been like, wow, that was so hard. And they've either overcome them, or they've worked through them. They've evolved, they're continuing to evolve. They're continuing to work through that. And I think so often we do ourselves a disservice. Because we don't let ourselves get super uncomfortable. We don't let ourselves sit in the heart and say, Okay, well what is on the other side of heart. And just because it's hard, doesn't mean I shouldn't do it. And you've probably heard me talk about having a problem solver mindset. This is, in my opinion, one of my greatest skill sets. And one of the greatest skill sets for life that I think anyone can have is being a problem solver, allowing yourself to always believe that you can find a version of a solution. And you can find someone or something to support you with that, that it's not all on you. And when we think about something being hard, whether it's an activity with the kids moving up in your career, starting a business, having an issue with a relationship, a tech issue, whatever it may be becoming a mom graduating school, all these things are hard, not graduating school, doing things differently, being a stay at home mom, all super hard. But what do you do with your heart? And just because it's hard doesn't mean you shouldn't do it? Just because being a stay at home mom is hard doesn't mean you shouldn't do it. Just because being a working mom is hard doesn't mean you shouldn't do it. Just because it's hard to fold the laundry sometimes doesn't mean you shouldn't do it. So how do you know when you shouldn't do something? And I think this comes back to just our intuition and using also facts and data and looking at where the opportunity cost is greater than the decision. And that means really looking at if I don't do this, what am I going to lose? If I do this? What am I going to gain and being able to take a step back and just identify should you move through your hard life is full of choices. And it sounds cliche, but it really is a matter of the fact that every single day we are all given choice. Some may feel like you don't have a choice, some situations, you may feel that way. But every day you are given a choice somewhere in some way. And you have the ability to either respond in a certain way, maybe you don't have the ability to change what's given to you. But you have the ability to have a choice around your response, or your action following something. And just because it's hard doesn't mean you shouldn't do it. been interviewing and talking to a lot of people lately about their healing journey. So whether they've been through trauma or different experiences, or they just want to better themselves in different ways. That's a difficult choice. That's hard. Opening up your feelings and gearboxes sometimes can be harder than just burying things. And you have to make the choice of what is going to be your heart. I think about this with my health all the time. You have heard me talking about this before is the number one thing I don't prioritize in my life. And there are moments where I will feel like okay, getting up and making time for this today. is hard, especially my first trimester, I wasn't feeling well, I was like, Oh my gosh, this is hard. When I don't feel like physically, they I have the energy or the ability to do different things. It's hard. But I know that my heart now is going to help my heart later, that if I don't put in the effort to take care of my body and my health, now, that's going to be a lot harder down the road, that I'm going to have a fully different version of hard if I don't care for myself and my body. And this can show up with our goals, too. You may make a decision in this season of life that feels like you're doing a lot, you're pushing yourself to your limits, you're pushing yourself to evolve, to grow to change, do different things, that might feel really hard. But if you don't do that, then what's on the other side. If you don't do the thing that you're wondering about, if you don't allow yourself to dream to evolve to go after whatever that is, then what? So I just want to remind you that just because something is hard, doesn't mean you shouldn't do it.

11:15

And if you're struggling with the first step to take, then just focus on baby steps. Because the saying that Rome wasn't built in a day is super applicable, because you're not going to be able to hit the highest best version of hard. And what's on the other side of that without going through a couple valleys in different struggles. I hiked Half Dome before I had kids. And if you're not familiar with Half Dome, it's a hike in Yosemite. And there are some parts of it. That felt really challenging to me because it wasn't something that I necessarily trained for. And there's this one area specifically that has a bunch of switchbacks. And the switchbacks is more specifically challenging. And when we were doing those, I had this analogy, just going through my head, the whole time of this is challenging, this is hard, and I'm gonna keep going around each thing. But guess what, that is one of the best experiences that I have had. And hiking halftone getting to the top of it is definitely something I was proud of, and I am proud of. And it's something that no one can ever take away from me. And was it hard? Yeah, it was really hard. I was really sore. I was so sore, and definitely learned that maybe I should be more active and train more. But that hard, didn't mean I shouldn't have done it. I also participated in the Susan G. Komen walk in San Francisco, and that was 39 miles. And that was actually harder than half dome. But the experience of doing that with some other women the experience of pushing and challenging myself, and continually thinking about the other women that had been through even harder challenges that had fought for their life and either been able to overcome or lose what was meant to be for them. That is so much harder than me doing that walk. Right. And I in that moment chose to do hard because it didn't mean I shouldn't have. So I give you these examples personally, professionally and in different scenarios. For you to understand every day, you have the opportunity to go after hard to see what's after it. And just because something's hard doesn't mean you shouldn't do it as Glennon Doyle says we can do hard things. And I am so proud of you mama, I am sending you so much love. And I would love if you would send me a message on Instagram. You can send us a message over to mana high schools mo MMA if you're not following us there you definitely should be. And I would love to know what is something that you're currently doing the tart. And this is only your measurement of heart, right? I don't want you to think about what anyone else considers heart. I want you to tell me what feels hard for you right now. Is it getting out of bed every day? Is it pushing yourself in your business? Is it trying not to yell at your kids? What is it that is hard for you right now? Share it with me. I want you to allow yourself to be a little vulnerable. And tell me what is it that's hard for you right now. All right. Talk to you soon mama. Mom in your life that you see and love her by sharing this episode. Giving while your cup is overflowing always pays itself back tenfold when you need it most.