Acknowledgment, Celebration (or not), and Reality. Where are you at? 

This year has been a big one in so many ways: Big Emotions. Big Developments. Big Changes. Big Adjustments (or not). Just… well. Big. 

Listen in as Jen + Jane debate on what (if anything) to celebrate, how to acknowledge what this year has been, and some tools and tips to support you over the Holiday season. 

One of those tools is The Empowerment Playbook. If you haven’t already downloaded it, we encourage you to do that and set aside 20 minutes where you can move through some of the feelings you’re experiencing. It will support you with observing, noticing, and accepting where you’re at. It will help you articulate more clearly what you might be needing. Above all,  we hope it will help bring you an opportunity for calm as we move through this.  

Additional Resources/Reading:

• The Empowerment Playbook https://www.wearejenandjane.com/playbook

Disclaimer:

On the No Halos Here Podcast, we explore a wide range of topics broadly categorized as well-being. We encourage you to do your own research and make informed choices about your health and wellbeing. The information we provide is never a substitute for qualified advice specific to your individual needs. In listening, you take full responsibility for implementing any suggestions shared on the podcast and you agree to indemnify us completely against all consequences arising directly or indirectly from your choices.

About Jen and Jane

Jen Lang

Jen believes in the power and wisdom of women’s voices. She’s a guide for women who want to tune into and align their inner voice so their outer voice can shine; uniting physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual energies into a powerful voice ready to share your message.

Jane Stark

Passionate about energetic alignment and living life from a place of personal power, Jane is a heart-centered leader, certified health and life coach, and marketing strategist.  She leads others to play bigger and feel lighter by helping them see and navigate their blocks and connect more deeply with themselves.

Continue the conversation:

Instagram: www.instagram.com/wearejenandjane 

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/WeareJenandJane 

Community: Get the Empowerment Playbook (and access our Community Calls) here: https://www.wearejenandjane.com/playbook 

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This is no halos here hosted by Jen Lang and Jane

Stark, the place to inspire a change in your consciousness to

elevate the world. We're to heart centered business owners

nourishing our inner rebels while growing our respective

businesses.

No halos here is the result of bringing together an

opera singer turn spiritual mentor and a marketing

professional turned well being coached to meditate daily.

Together, we unite physical, mental, emotional and spiritual

energies into a powerful presence to lead, heal and

inspire. We love exploring the shadowed edges of life, the

universe and beyond through honest and thought provoking

conversations. Let's dive in.

Hi, and welcome back to another episode of no halos

here with Jen Lang and Jane Stark. We are excited to have

you here with us for our holiday wrap episode. And we had to set

a different direction about way we each had our own ideas about

the way this episode might roll out. And so I'm going to hand

this over to Jane to sort of get us started on it. And then we're

going to provide some wonderful guidance and content for you for

the end of the year.

Okay. Yeah, we were just reflecting on our years, I

think, you know, and what, what we've been through, and not just

us, but reflecting on how big of a year 2021 seems to have been

for everyone. I'm gonna enjoy everyone. Everything. Yeah. You

know, and it's been a common theme. I think Jen and I both

noticed in talking to people in our own circles in our personal

lives, just how much stuff shit has been happening in people's

lives. It's not I mean, yes, we all know that we're living

through a pandemic, but it's not just that it's like, it just

seems to be you know, there's loss of loved ones, there's

divorce, there's, you know, mental health, there's, like,

there's just so many layers and levels happening. And, you know,

in I think in, in the self help world, in our, in our world, you

know, we, we don't want to get down a rabbit hole of just

looking at the negative and going, Oh, my God, it's been so

horrible. And so Jen was like, you know, what, like, we also

want to look for the things that to celebrate, and maybe we

should start out with a celebration. And I had a really

strong reaction. I was like, I do not feel the celebration

energy right now at all. Like, yes, we're headed into the

holidays, and I don't get me wrong. I'm not like, I'm not in

a scrooge mentality. But I'm like, celebrate just didn't land

for me. And so we wanted to bring that here to the show and

talk about that, and how, you know, there are different things

that work for each of us. And so, what we kind of what we came

to was acknowledgment. And what if we could just acknowledge

everything that we all have been through individually and

collectively over the last year. And that landed a lot better for

me. I'm like, Yeah, I can, I can do that. That feels neutral.

Celebration felt a bit

worst, I would say Forrest Yeah, me. But maybe.

So can you give us a little bit of a backer like what

did celebration bring up for you and feel like and it's always

more aligned for you. It's

it's definitely more aligned for me. And and I'm not

saying because we we did talk about the word celebration, and

especially in self help communities, celebration can be

a way of Yes, acknowledging the good and moving into a higher

vibe, higher vibration. And it can also be a way of bypassing

the actual problems underneath. Right.

And that's what I said. Right? So bypassing, like,

I feel like we're bypassing all of the shit that went on this

year.

Yeah. So from my perspective, and with a lot of

the coaches that I've worked with, I always feel it's

actually helpful to start with celebration as a way to

acknowledge all the awesome stuff that has happened. Yeah.

And so for example, like, there's no reason why we

couldn't celebrate the fact that we launched our podcast this

year, which is an awesome way to celebrate.

Yeah, don't get me wrong. I'm not saying I don't

want to acknowledge any of the positives. I totally agree with

it. Yeah, important to

us. But the celebration space is can feel

forced. So it kind of serves a dual purpose where there's this.

If we don't move into that space of celebration of consciously

celebrating the accomplishments and constantly celebrating, you

know, what we have all lived through and experienced this

year, then we run the risk of being dragged down into the

space of this year is so hard. Everything about this year was

so hard. And we fall into that judgment space.

I'm like, oh, yeah, clearly I, I'm a singer, I express myself

through tones and tonality. Kurt calls me out on that sometimes,

too, it's pretty funny. So, if we are always caught in how hard

something is, then it's hard. It's harder and harder to see

where the good isn't where the shining light is. And it's like,

I think it's Leonard Cohen, piece of piece of poetry, where

the cracks are where the light comes in. And

I think it's a Go ahead. Did you talk about is

there? Okay. You say? I think it's, it's a real balance. For

me, it feels like, between, because I 100% agree. And, you

know, I mean, I start most of my coaching sessions off with Ken

want you to tell me what went well, because I know what's

gonna I know that we're gonna get into the what's not going?

Well, that's why we're, you know, part of the reasons, we're

often talking, but so what went well, for the exact reasons that

you just shared, right that you have to, it's very easy for our

brains to just want to focus on the negative. Yeah, and we like

to bypass the positives. However, I guess, where I was

coming from, and what I was feeling when we first had this

discussion is around, also just acknowledging what was and like,

not trying to sugarcoat it, like 2021 was a really hard year, I

think, for a lot of people. And we were reflecting, reflecting

earlier, Jen and I, in another conversation with a friend that,

you know, 2020 was rough. And we all kind of were like, I mean, I

feel like a little bit like we were all just in shock with

2020. Right, like what just happened. But I know, you know,

you and I both shared last year at the beginning of this year

that like 2020 was actually a really great year for me

personally. Yeah. I felt like 2020 was a really good year.

2021 has been different. Yeah. Not that it hasn't had its its

highlights, and it's good things but 2021. And I've talked to a

few people that are just like a, how did we get to December of

2021? Like what just happened? Clip? Yeah, I was I was at the

hair salon yesterday, actually, we were talking and one of the

girls was like, she's like, somebody pointed out to me the

other day that we've basically been in this pandemic for two

years. And it's like, and we were like, Whoa, yeah, that's

crazy. Right? We still think back to like, oh, yeah, when the

pandemic started, and it doesn't, I don't know, I don't

feel like it feels like almost two years ago. No. But so 2021

has just, it's had a different energy. It's how to, there has

been sort of a heaviness to it, and a, you know, just, you know,

like, yes, continuing to navigate a pandemic, and and

just the highs and the lows that have come with that. You know,

we're, we're getting out of it. Oh, we're not getting out of it.

Oh, we're getting out of it. Oh, here's another variant. Like,

it's that constant

cycling through highs and lows. I think. Well, there

was that New York Times article, I think it about the there was

two, there were two books. We'll find them and we'll put them in

the show notes. But one thing of languishing, yes. That was the

other one, I think was it Brene. Brown. She was Adam Grant.

And you get it, we'll get it link it up with the

correct will get the correct author. Yeah, they don't. But

yeah, languishing was the term. And so yeah, if we feel

like we've been languishing through 2021 hit for

you feel that way, you're definitely not alone. And this

constant cycling through, up and down and up and down. You know,

or through different regulations. Depending on where

you are in the world, you can travel, you can't travel, oh,

you've traveled, oh, it's gonna be more complicated to get back

to your home country. Or if you leave, you can't come back to

your home countries, a lot of my friends in Australia and New

Zealand are experiencing. So there's a lot of nuance in this.

Recognizing and acknowledging 2021 where you might not want

to, you might want to just be like, fuck, and burn it all

down. I'm just gonna leave it in the past and move forward, which

is one way of approaching it and not saying it's right or wrong.

It is one way of approaching with it. So

I think that's the piece though. That's where Yeah,

I just I feel like a little bit like, let's call it out for what

it was like, and for the last two years, for that matter,

right? These have been probably some like these are, these are

times that are going to be in the history books like we are

living through, you know, our version of World Wars, really on

a totally different level. Exactly. Yeah, not the same, but

like, a new version of it. And I think there is something to be

said for needing to recognize that and recognize what we're

in. And in that, we can find a little bit of compassion or a

little bit of grace for ourselves. And I know for me

personally, and again, in conversations I've had with

others, it's like, the macro is reflecting in the micro, or vice

versa. But like, you know, it's definitely I'm seeing that where

what we just talked about, that's happening kind of

globally and for the collective, we're also seeing happen

individually. Yes, in our own in our own lives. And so we've

seen a lot unfolding. Yeah, and it's a lot, it's we're

seeing it unfolding in personal relationships and marriages,

relationships with, with loved ones, you know, and that's what

we want to bring your attention to, with this episode,

especially with this holiday wrap piece is moving into the

state of observation and reflection, without reliving

some of the extreme emotions that you may have experienced in

the past year. So what can you observe? And it is that aspect

of hindsight brings clarity. And I was actually thinking when you

were talking just now, Jane, about 10 years from now, when we

look back on this time, what will what will be the narrative

and what will be the dialogue that is put out into the world?

Because there will be the lived experiences of it. You know,

there will be, you know, kids who were born during the

pandemic, will they be identified as like the pandemic

generated babies or COVID? Babies, you know, and so when we

have this, if you can bring yourself forward, five or 10

years, and after this transition time has passed, what do you

want it to be like, and we'll probably touch on that. And then

in the new year, as well. But looking back, and reflecting on

this time, will give you fuel? And I'm hoping inspiration as to

how you want to move forward. Yep. And that might just be the

next three weeks. Yeah,

I mean, I think that was the intention of this

episode, right? We have to look and go, Okay, this is going to

come out on December 14, as we head into prime holiday time.

And, and the whole conversation around celebrating or

acknowledging or whichever term lands for you was really about

reflecting but not in that January reflection energy, but

in this, okay, it's been a big year. How do I want to move

through this big season? Because this is kind of the big finale

of our year, every year. Right? And, and it's often so frantic,

I saw a really funny meme yesterday. And it was of it was

a picture of an animal. I don't remember what it was, it wasn't

a bear. But it was an animal that hibernates and it was

talking about how animals in the winter sleep, and rest and

whatnot. And then the other picture was like this picture of

like, Christmas chaos and like, you know, and they're like

humans, on the other hand in the winter, start shopping, and

visiting and baking, and did it and hosting and doing all the

things and I was like, wow, it's and they're like, Yeah, we kind

of got this wrong. Like, it just it was really accurate. Like,

yeah, it's so fascinating. Hey, like, we're headed into the

solstice on the 21st in North America, that means we're headed

into like, you know, the dark hibernation hibernation time and

what do we do we push ourselves like no other to be out there.

And so I guess really what we want to offer up is that moment

for you guys to pause and go How do I want to move through these

next couple of weeks and through this season? Knowing too that

that can really set us up for the next year? Yeah, and I don't

know I'm not really feeling the hole at this point. All of the

set your you know, what do you want January to be and look

forward to like you know what's 22 to kind of bring what are you

leaving behind

that internationals frantic right now it does a you

can do planning any time this is the this is the other face. You

don't have to do the planning now. You can you can sit with

where you're at probably is the most valuable piece of guidance

we can offer on today's episode. Even if you're just listening,

whatever it is you're doing, whatever it is you're feeling,

whoever you're with, sit with where you were at today, right

now, and give it the acknowledgement and recognition

that you deserve.

Yeah, except what is in front of you right now. And

what do you need and tune in? Like what do you need? I think a

big piece of this and again, a big theme of the last couple of

years that has been shown to us is around, like regulating our

nervous system, right and figuring that out, which is, you

know, self care was heard of the term that's always thrown

around. But really, at the root of self care, the reason that we

do it is to keep ourselves regulated and to keep our and to

help our nervous systems stay in that healthy state. So

we're at least come down from redlining. So this is

this is the other part of this whole cycling process over 2021

is if you have been in a near constant state of accelerated

energy or Accelerated stress, then there are certain

physiological responses that your body will have. And we

talked about that on last week's episode with Laura Craddock. So

if you haven't, do go back and listen to that one, for sure. So

when you're in this state, and you're needing to restore your

nervous system to a bit more of a natural level, it's not a

question of I'm going to throw 10 tools at it and hope for the

best. It's my quiz. You know, this is also this is also the

season of extremes. And this season of excess. So whether

you're in the summer or winter, southern hemisphere, or northern

hemisphere, so it might just be what, again, what I said, What

do you need right now? What's one easy, simple thing you can

do right now to just back?

I've, I've actually really been trying to be

conscious of doing some of the deep breathing. And it sounds so

simple, but I mean, and I, you know, I told it, and I don't do

it all the time, like, and but I've found myself lately, just

being like literally, okay, just like stop and take three

conscious breaths. Yeah. And it can be as small as that. And it

actually does, it really does help. Or this morning, you know,

I was sharing with Jen. Before we got on that I just, I woke up

feeling kind of anxious, I woke up with some tightness in my

chest. And I just, rather than just pushing through my day, and

going oh, like trying to ignore it, and and busy myself, which I

can very easily do, I really made the conscious effort to

just sit with it and be like, What is this? Is this even mine.

And, you know, going through a little bit of my practices and

tools to just let that go and move it. And in all honesty, I

did that this morning. And it didn't, it shifted it a little

bit, but it still was there about an hour later. And then I

had to check in again. And I was like, I wonder if I need to like

hop on the bike and just X like sweat this out. And, you know,

so looking for those different ways. But the first piece is

actually being able to witness and see and acknowledge that

hey, actually I've got I can feel that tightness in my chest,

or I can feel that emotion sitting there right under the

surface. I think that's that's the other piece is just like you

say, allowing what's here? Yeah, so if there's an emotion right

there, and you can, you know, allow yourself five minutes to

go and have a little cry. Could you give that to yourself this

year?

Yeah, but gift that literally gift that to yourself.

On the other extreme, you might be feeling angry and frustrated.

So what would it take for you to a acknowledge that anger and

frustration to yourself without taking it out on loved ones? Or

be finding an outlet for that anger and frustration, that

doesn't hurt anybody. And so when you bottle up that anger

and frustration inside, all you're doing is you're turning

that inward to yourself and your physiological body is going to

show those effects. But if you are finding an outlet for you

know, get exercise, move your body, like join some martial

arts or something

that cannot our empowerment playbook. Yes, well,

actually, yes,

let's actually do that. So the empowerment

playbook is that tool that we've designed that's available for

anybody and everybody to use. It's full of creative ideas to

move through those emotions. It's a guided process. We meet

once a month in a community to talk about aspects of the

process. And actually, in the new year, we're gonna have some

pop up calls to work through the playbook together, which is

really excited.

But the end the way we designed it, is sort of to

that hybrid of what you were just sharing, right? Where it's

like, there's a guided process to get you to reflect, to

identify the emotions. And then there's a step where it's like,

actually now get into the embodiment piece and how do you

need to move that emotion? Is it through art? Is it through

music? Is it through movement? Is it through tears, but just,

you know, so if you need some support with that it might be a

place to look. Yeah, and help through that. I wanted to touch

Jen on We talked briefly about how we follow you know, some of

the As the astrologers and various different people in our

circles that are all talking about the energy that's out

there right now, a lot about what we're feeling, I have to

say, as I've started to follow some of this stuff more closely

in the last two years, it never fails to amaze me how accurate

Stroud of it has been. And it's really more, it's not accurate.

This is not about predicting events, yes, about predicting,

or looking at themes of what things might feel like. And that

part has been really interesting for me to be like, huh, I never

would have seen this coming. But this is exactly what they said

in terms of how this felt. So I was thinking, you know, where

we're at right now. And looking forward, a little bit into 2022.

What's the energy you're picking up on? What are you?

Oh, you know, I described it to someone this

week as sort of where we're currently at as we're being

squeezed smaller and smaller through a smaller and smaller

space. And it is, it feels like it's is an aspect of rebirthing

if you want to go down those terms, but they like we're

feeling the squeeze and the energy of where we're going, I

feel is not the pressure is not going to be letting up in the

next. Yeah. period of time. I'm just I'm not going to say weeks

or months or years. There is no timeline in that respect. It's

going to get crunchier. And so part of the reason we've created

those tools, like the empowerment playbook is to help

you through these crunchy times help you through those Squeezy

spots, and to provide that guidance and support. So where I

see it going, is still crunchier and still squeeze here. And at

the same time, I know he's totally technical words easier,

it's easier, squeeze, get your squeeze on. And at the same

time, it's unnecessary process. So is there there is, from a

listeners perspective, if you don't have a lot of these tools

at your fingertips, then start building your toolbox and start

building the skills and ways that you can go further inward.

It's it's not the the external journey is causing the inward

squeezing. So the inward squeezing is where you can begin

to resolve and let off the pressure. That's your tool.

Okay. Expand on that.

Expand on that. All right, go deeper. Thank you.

James gave me this look like? You mean, what are you talking

about? This is a big metaphor,

that's really deep. We need to unpack this. Okay. So

all of the events we're experiencing in our day to

day lives, whether it's in our relationships, whether it's on a

global platform, whether it's like, virus, something, I don't

know, variant number 7463. And you're having booster number

10,000. I don't know, I don't know. But the all those external

pressures on us, that caused us to have those internal

responses, like the internal emotions, or the anger and the

frustration, and the whatever it is, you're feeling, it's valid.

And at the same time, it's by going deeper into those feelings

for yourself and resolving them for yourself. That will take the

pressure off. So when we do the inner work, the pressure

reduces. But if you're constantly looking for external

solutions, to internal problems, to internal problems, that are

external problems, but they're manifesting as internal

problems, if you're constantly looking. So for example, if

you're numbing with overwork, or if you're numbing with alcohol

or substances, then yes, it's going to take away the pain and

the discomfort that you're feeling. But it's actually not

taking the pressure off. So then, the question you need to

ask is, why do I have this behavior? Why is this B and you

might not even recognize it as a behavior because it's such an

ingrained habit. Yeah. So again, that's process of observing.

This is a prime opportunity to observe

and observing so one of the things that I have

started to do and found helpful with the observing is in

journaling, or writing things out and noticing and allowing.

So one of the things is you can almost write it as the third

person. So that's one one way that sometimes we can trick our

brain is start to write out whatever the situation is. or

whatever the feelings and the emotions are, and write it as if

you're the third person like reading a book.

Even give yourself a different name if you want.

Yeah, give your try reading with your middle name.

Mm hmm. Or, alternatively, I have been able

to, instead of writing the third person, but I can I literally

have to step up almost step outside of myself, and look in

and be like, What is she feeling? Or what and I can do it

still, it's like, what am I feeling, but it is that

separation and being able to witness and sometimes just

writing it out and seeing it written on paper without being

completely in the emotion is the piece that's really important

when we can start to pull that away a little bit, then we can

start to, to observe in what you were what Jen was sharing there.

And that's, yeah, that's the enormous degree inside work.

It is the inside work. And it's the other aspect of

this is as it's I think it's even more important over the

holiday season to double down on this work. So to carve out the

time, and yes, we have lots on the go. And yes, you know,

there's still seven Christmas gifts to pick up and or three

parties to attend or whatever it is, that's playing out for you.

Even if it means you getting up 30 minutes earlier each morning,

carve out the time is invaluable, and you will never

get that time back. So this, it is making your emotions a

priority to yourself.

Yep, it's funny. Gentlemen, we hopped on our call

this morning. You said so I think many of you know if you

don't know, this whole podcast was born out of 70 meditations

that Jen and I started doing back in 2020. And we continued

having those little they kind of evolved into life conversations

meditation slash mini meetings, at 7am. And we, in the last

couple months have stopped meetings so frequently and doing

those. And you just said to me this morning, like, we need to

get those back. Because we actually notice how much you

know, it's a way for us, I think, to have that

accountability piece. So that we're doing that. We're sharing,

we're connecting. We're doing the meditations, we're carving

out that time for ourselves. So I know it's hard. What I'm

saying is we're in it to like we we do it to we've dropped it.

And we're both noticing how impactful those 30 minutes 7am

meetings are for us.

I'm having a real time idea right now. Yeah. This might

be I'm not saying this is going to happen. However, I'm thinking

that it would be really cool to have a listener meditation,

maybe twice a week, two mornings a week at 7am. Pacific. And it's

a space where you can carve out that time. So like we create

that time we create that time for people to show up. Cool, and

just like 20 minutes. Yep. So it's a public open to you. 20

minutes. Meditation spot. There's no preamble. You don't

have to put cameras on. No cameras, seven, eight cameras.

Definitely not Jameis.

And I've always had that rule. No cameras, no

cameras. Even when we did zoom. We it was always cameras off.

Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Well, anyway, good idea. We'll play with that.

Come back.

We'll come back. We roll on back to that because it

might not be zoom. It might be another platform. So we'll stay

tuned on that. I'm just having this real time idea. Like maybe

that's something we can do for our community. It's just short

term. Yeah, twice. Yeah, twice a week. Moving through moving into

2220 22.

Yeah, I like it. Okay, so Okay, I think with

that, but summarize here. So back crunchy here. denser,

crunchy and wet squeezy,

crunchy, and Squeezy. Crunchy and Squeezy. Time counts

when you're feeling the squeeze?

Yes, some more than others. Maybe you've had a

really great year and that's awesome. celebrate that. Yes. I

am not anti celebration. You know, celebrate that. And if

not, if not acknowledge that. We see you were in it. Yeah, it's

it's not easy. We don't need to sugarcoat and pretend like it's

easy. It's not, you're not not been easy. And connect back in

to what you need. Right now. What would what is your heart

calling to you? Yeah. To do to be through the next couple of

weeks through the holiday season. What can you give

yourself to make it an enjoyable, soothing time?

That's great advice. I think we'll roll out on that.

All right. Have an amazing holiday season. We will not have

any new episodes for the next two weeks. Our next episode will

drop the first week of January. And we are going to be talking

about Yeah, we have some really great topics mapped out. We're

so excited. Thank you so much for being part of our first year

of podcasting together. We are totally celebrating that

celebrating that yeah, celebrating you and recognizing

and acknowledging where you're at. Thank you, everybody. Have

an amazing break. Take care. Thanks for joining us for these

conscious combos. If you're ready to dive deeper, head on

over to Dr. Jenn and jane.com to continue the conversation.

If you'd love this episode, please take a moment to

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