Fear of public speaking or being seen doesn't disappear before you start; it disappears because you start! To overcome your fears of being seen, you’re going to need to step outside your comfort zone.

This episode is all about why stepping out of your comfort zone to gain visibility in business comes down to taking action and using your voice. To discuss this, I'm joined by Alya Annabi, TEDx speaker and founder of Positive Push, who has spoken at events with WWF Singapore and the Climate Action Young Leaders Summit. We get into how to overcome fear of public speaking, why limiting beliefs and your inner critic feel true even when they're not, and exactly how Alya stepped outside her comfort zone going from zero speaking experience to landing a TEDx talk.

Timestamps:

09:54 - How To Overcome Limiting Beliefs And Your Inner Critic

20:40 - Why Visibility In Business Means Using Your Voice, Not Just Marketing

30:54 - How To Overcome Fear Of Public Speaking And Take Action Before You're Ready

In This Episode You'll Learn:

• How do you overcome fear of public speaking when you don't feel ready yet?
• What does it actually take to land a TEDx talk and become a public speaker with no experience?
• Why do limiting beliefs and imposter syndrome feel so convincing, even when they're not true?
• How does stepping outside your comfort zone actually build self belief in business?

If this conversation nudged something in you to take action to make yourself more visible, the takeaway is to take the one tiny step in front of you today!

If you've been scared of taking action to start your own online business idea, the Freedom Business Bootcamp is exactly where I'll help you start by getting clear on what idea to pursue, what offer to sell and who to sell it to. Join the Bootcamp here!

Connect With Alya Annabi:

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/alya.annabi/

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/alya-annabi/

Website: www.alya-annabi.com

About The Working For Me Podcast:

Working For Me is for high-achieving dreamers on a journey to build a business, and a life, that actually works for them.

Whether you're still stuck in a corporate 9-5, wondering how you can navigate the transition from employee to entrepreneur, or you've already quit your job to start and your business is feeling anything but free - this podcast helps you find a better work life balance by building an online business that's set up to achieve your goals.

Hosted by Sophie Biggerstaff, Anti-Hustle Business Mentor and Writer/Host of Working For Me - each episode explores real strategy and honest conversation about doing what you love and building a business that's genuinely working for you, not one you work for!

Subscribe for real entrepreneurship stories, and practical strategies for building something that's genuinely yours.

Success isn't just a fantasy - but you do need to write your own version of it - this podcast helps you do exactly that.

Find your starting point:

📖 Quit your 9-5 and navigate the transition into entrepreneurship with my Playbook: https://onlinebusinessschool.itssophiebiggerstaff.com/freedom-founder-playbook

🎓 Start an online business using AI in my Business Bootcamp: https://onlinebusinessschool.itssophiebiggerstaff.com/registration-page

💡Re-write your business strategy and align it with your version of success in a 1:1: https://itssophiebiggerstaff.com/11-coaching-call/

Connect With Me:

🗣️ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/sophie-biggerstaff-business-coach/

📝 Substack: https://itssophiebiggerstaff.substack.com/

💻 Website: https://www.itssophiebiggerstaff.com

Mentioned in this episode:

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Sophie

What if the thing that's holding you back from being seen in your business isn't your strategy? It's not your content plan, or it's not even your offer. It's the fact that you're waiting until you feel ready to use your voice. The reality is that moment of ready might never come. Because the reality is, the more in business, we're never really ready for anything.

Sophie

Sophie

Today on the podcast, we're getting into something. I know so many of you feel that whole to share your message more powerfully, to show up on stages, on podcasts, and in rooms that feel a little bit too big. Why you think you are right now. Because we're going to be talking about public speaking as a visibility tool, and why using your voice isn't just a nice to have in business.

Sophie

It's one of the most powerful things you can do for your business to get yourself seen by the right people. Today I'm talking to Aliya and Arnab and TEDx speaker, entrepreneur and self-described activator who has made it her mission to push women into action before they feel ready. She's a keynote speaker, a mentor, and a hype woman extraordinaire who has spoken at events alongside organizations like WWF Singapore, LA French Tech and the Climate Action Young Leaders Summit.

Sophie

She's also the founder of Positive Push, a community and mentorship space built to help ambitious women turn self-doubt into action. Her TEDx talk was called How Hanging My Laundry Changed My Life, and I had a big question to start this podcast about what does that actually mean? So if you're looking for more speaking opportunities, or looking to try and step into your power and get really, truly seen in your business, this is an episode you're not going to want to miss.

Sophie

Speaking of getting yourself to take action, I am here to help you take action to actually start your online business. Now, the one way that I can help you do that is by joining my Freedom Business Bootcamp. The Freedom Business Bootcamp has been specifically designed for those of you who have been sitting on an idea for an online business for more than six months now, I am going to guide you through actually stepping out of any fears that you've got that have been holding you back, and start taking action within 72 hours of actually starting the bootcamp, so that you can start building your online business.

Sophie

Ultimately, you always have to take the best action, but sometimes you might need a little nudge to get there. And I'm going to give you that nudge. The link to join is in the show notes, and you can join the Freedom Business Bootcamp to start taking action on building your online business today. Now let's get into the episode.

Speaker 2

Hi. Welcome to the Freedom Method podcast. How you did.

Speaker 3

I'm good. And you?

Speaker 2

I'm really good. Thank you. I want to start somewhere because this episode is all about public speaking and using your voice. And I know that you did a Ted talk, today so called how how you Malone g changed my life. So I would love this summary. What does that mean? And how did hanging in your laundry change your life?

Speaker 3

Speaker 3

So I started adding the speakers. I started, also just basically listening to their advice about how to lead one and just how they did it as well. And eventually I signed up to a webinar, the charity called How to Land talk. And the lady who animated that webinar that what you can do is go on the Ted website and just look for events that are near your location and apply for them, because each event is run independently, which means that there's a different team per event.

Speaker 3

So try to look for something that is like, you know, link to what you want to share about and just apply for it. You never know. Right? So that's what I did. I went all the websites on the talk in Singapore around the team views, which was all about like inspiration, and it was for youth. So that's when I pitched, three ideas actually.

Speaker 3

And the one that was picked was this one. So I had a bunch of interviews with the team and then eventually got to say yes, and I had like two months to prepare, but that was, an idea that was close to my heart because it was about how, you know, like when you reconnect to your inner voice and also to nature as humans, because we are nature.

Speaker 3

Well, you can generally like reconnect your inner world and who you are as a person, because I had spent so much time running from that and running from my own truth, which was at the time that I wanted to run my own business and, you know, work in sustainability as well. And, yeah, being in nature really helped me for that.

Speaker 3

Like to contribute. But hanging my laundry was the moment that it was quite enough for me to be pay attention to that inner voice that that to me at that time, you can quote, it was the three words that were like, so loud, like I couldn't ignore them any worse. And the rest of the stories in the talk.

Speaker 3

So maybe you can put.

Speaker 2

The link if you want. Yeah, I love that. Definitely. That's so cool. And was that your first that was your first speaking opportunity or had you done anything before that?

Speaker 3

Speaker 3

And I remember having four people, one of them, including my husband. But hey, like your brain, when you have just three people, it's all really intelligence for your brain. So that from there kind of like gave me the confidence. And I started, like, doing those talks to my colleagues as well. And then I joined forces with a friend to like that still on the side, like to run workshops and walk talks.

Speaker 3

And then of course went more virtual because, of Covid and yeah, my kind of speaking career started from there. I want to say, and initially what I had almost forgotten also about was that I was doing a lot of theater when I was younger. So it's something that has always been in me, which is, you know, being a bit of a center of attention on stage, having people to listen to me and just, you know, entertain them in a way.

Speaker 3

So, yeah, that's how that came to light.

Speaker 2

That's really interesting that you mention that that was something that you, thrived as, as a kid because I when I teach about, like, starting a business to based around, like, your freedom goals and looking at, like, what you should start based on what those freedom lifestyle goals are. I always ask, whoever I'm teaching to think about, what were you really good at?

Speaker 2

Or what did you love doing as a kid? Because 90% of the time there's some kind of crossover between what you were really great at, what you thrived in as a child, and what you want to do as an adult. And I think we forget about those skills and we forget about those hobbies and passions that we had as a child.

Speaker 2

Sometimes, because we're so wrapped up in our adult lives and reconnecting with those I think is really special and really powerful and I've been on my own journey more recently to try and reconnect with a lot of things. I love the kid. I loved dancing as a kid, and I think it's something that blocks us from doing some of these things in adult life is that, I don't know.

Speaker 2

For example, for me, as a as a kid, I love singing, dancing, and I remember very specifically when I, was in secondary school. So when I was in primary school, I was a performer, same as you like, I loved theater, I like would put on like, shows in front of the whole school, the whole classroom. And then when I go to secondary school, people were better than me.

Speaker 2

Right? So I very quickly realized, oh, I'm not a great singer, I'm not the best dancer. And somewhere inside of me, like I got, I pushed that down and I never did it that in, in my adult life because I, I resisted because I thought I wasn't good at it. But now I'm having this massive call to go back to dance, getting back to sing.

Speaker 2

And not because I'm good at it, but because I feel like it's something that I'm supposed to have in my life to bring me joy and pleasure. And that was something I love doing as a child, and I'm having to work through these, these things in my head that are telling me you're not good enough to do this, you know, good enough to do this.

Speaker 2

Because I think we, we get so conditioned to, to out of, hobbies and passions. So I love that you've been able to go full circle and bring that into the work that you're doing today.

Speaker 3

Yeah, absolutely. And you know that voice that says, you know, you're not good enough or you're not good at it? I think, you know, we generally everyone has this voice inside. It's like your own inner critic that is here to keep you safe, keep you in your comfort zone, doesn't really want you to try new things, but I genuinely believe that if you keep feeding that other voice that once you, you know, to do those things, those things that are important to you, then you know, like listen to that one instead.

Speaker 3

You know, like one. That voice told me, oh, you, you know so much about sustainability, why not share to the world then? I never asked myself, like, what if no one showed up? What if like, what if, what if, what if I just, like, just took action on that? Okay. I'm good. I've been here and I told people about it and I got excited.

Speaker 3

And then it just brings back, you know, all this puts you into, I don't know, just a happy, cool vibe where you're just, generally happy that you do these things that you want to do, you know, and even if it feels a bit scary, of course, and a bit uncomfortable like this comes for everyone. But I've always been my I always remind myself that there's a first one to literally everything.

Speaker 3

Like you had your first podcast episode ever. You have, you know what I mean? Like like today we look at you and it's like flawless the way you ask questions and everything. But I'm sure that maybe before recording your very first episode, you're like, oh my God, like, what if this is this or this? But then eventually went well and you kept on going, right?

Speaker 3

So it's like, stop. It's really important to stop looking at and compare yourself to, you know, like, I'm sure you've heard this saying, you know, chapter 20 of someone when you're at chapter two for yourself. So you can only compare yourself to your best self. That's cool.

Speaker 2

Exactly. I fully agree, and I think you mentioned something about when you talking about the masterclass, that you got really excited, even if it was just for people shouting out one of them with you, with your partner, if that's a big deal, like that's so full humans that showed interest in what you were doing. And I think because of social media, because of the online space, we are so conditioned to think that that's not successful.

Speaker 2

Right. Like that. That's not what so many people, other people are achieving. Like you say, 20 steps ahead of us. And that's just the starting point. And I think if we can look at like these experiences that we go through in business and businesses, this is a constant trial and error process, a constant lesson. And essentially, if we can look at that, that first masterclass or the first podcast that we recording and say, okay, well, I took the action, I stepped outside my comfort zone to do the thing, and this is the result rather than me being beat up and say, oh my God, it's a failure because only four people kind of look

Speaker 2

at like, what did you get from that? Did that bring you joy? Did you enjoy doing this? And furthermore, what what did that teach you to do next time? Like, how can you look at what the lessons were in that to help you improve and help you grow and structure that? But you took the first step, and I think that's from what I understand about the work that you do is all about like taking taking the action and putting yourself in the positions, to be seen and put yourself out there.

Speaker 2

And until you take that action, you can't you will never be successful if you stay in the stock. Right? So you have to take the action and you speak a lot obviously, and work with women that want to do public speaking. Tell me a little bit about like some of the beliefs and things that you've seen for yourself and with people that you've worked with, the hold people back from going after what it is they actually want.

Speaker 3

Yeah, that's a very good question. So it's interesting that you say that because I don't necessarily specialize in public speaking for women. It's more like helping them take action on what they want, that's all. Like it can be different things, but, it's different for different people, of course. But I want to say one of the main things is keep repeating some old stories until we think and believe they are the truth.

Speaker 3

And, you know, some people say it's limiting beliefs. It can, you know, some people say, use other words, but at the end of the day, it's like even just, recently I had a session with a woman who's had, a difficult experience on camera because she got filmed a bit by surprise, like she was not really prepared for it.

Speaker 3

And they interviewed her with cameras and she didn't expect that. So for her, that experience was not like the best. It went well. She did her best that she could, but then she kept repeating to herself, I'm not great on camera. I'm not great on camera, like, you know, but I still need to at some point be on camera because I'm an entrepreneur and I'm going to show to people a bit more of my face and all this.

Speaker 3

So we had the whole session, and then actually I helped her just like, like put the light on. What was the lesson from that experience, but not that lets that experience define actually the progress you can make from that starting point, because that was her first time and you can only progress from there. And a lot of people, kind of let that one experience where they were not great or they would be bad at it define like their whole trajectory.

Speaker 3

Like if you look at top, you know, even athletes or people on stage or people that are like really excellent at what they do. Obviously there was a moment in their lives where, especially at the beginning of it, where they were not good, like they, you know, they were not good. They fell, they, they missed, they but they kept on going and they kept on learning.

Speaker 3

Like, imagine if you're a baby and you're learning how to walk and then you full obviously, because it's part of the process. But then you're like, oh, whatever. I'm not going to like try again and you just learn how to walk. Is that it? Like of course not. Like we walk. It means that we went through that process and we were babies but forgot about it.

Speaker 3

Right? So it's like, how do can you approach in that same mindset as when you're, you know, a child and you're young and you're learning something new to be like, it's okay to suck at it, it's okay to be a bit bad and to fail. And, you know that you're not that proud because actually was you thought you would do better and everything, but you know that you can only progress from that.

Speaker 3

So that's how like essentially with them, the way I worked is like I pushed them into just taking that first step because usually that creates momentum for yourself. But not let like an old story define also the what will happen next. And then second, never let your inner critic be the truth. Be the voice of truth. It's not the truth.

Speaker 3

It's literally just one voice inside of you that acts like a misguided protector in a way. But we think of it as the voice of truth, as definite. You know, it's like, oh no yourself that. No. Why? Like, why are you saying that? And just sometimes I challenge them on that and they're like, oh my God. Yeah. I've never thought about it this way, you know?

Speaker 3

So yeah, I think it's, it's really important to, to just keep believing in yourself at the end of the day, but just also keep that honesty with yourself, because sometimes there's things that we do. And it happened to me many times that I think like podcasting. Right? I tried having my own podcast, but there was like a few things.

Speaker 3

I really don't mean the process. And I did have someone to edit for me, and I think I was not like that connected anymore to like why I was doing that podcast and all this. So I was also honest with myself that, okay, maybe it's time to quit and just like, let it be, let it rest, and maybe one day I'll start cussing again on the topic.

Speaker 3

And that's also fine. But yeah, it's also like bringing part of fun in the process. Like if something makes you genuinely happy and brings you energy, like keep going for it, keep like fighting for it, keep taking action. Only if it drains you then please stop. Like don't keep at it just for the sake of it. Like that's also not great.

Speaker 3

So it's not any action as well.

Speaker 2

Yeah, no I agree I think a lot of people struggle with that part because especially in entrepreneurship, because again, we're fed this narrative online that we have to be post on Instagram. We have to be face on TikTok, you have to have a YouTube, you have some Substack, LinkedIn, all of the things. And that isn't those social media strategies or maps and strategies and not in alignment with every single person like.

Speaker 2

Or if on some business you have to think of like, what is going to energize you and what you do. The podcast you just mentioned is perfect example of that. If you weren't getting any energy from that, and it was a sucking energy that is taking away energy for me to show up on the platforms, like on the stages on LinkedIn, which I know you're very active on, like because you don't you're feeling depleted because you're trying to put all your energy and attention into the podcast, and then that's taking from the channels that are actually working for you, and that you do enjoy showing up on and that feel more organic for you to

Speaker 2

be on that. Because we've been fed this narrative, we should be everywhere, all the time. So many people don't give themselves permission to step back, and I was really guilty of that. I spent so many years trying to nail Instagram, and I hate Instagram. I don't even look at Instagram like I don't have no idea what's kind of on Instagram.

Speaker 2

So how on earth for a moment to create content for Instagram like it doesn't make any sense. And it wasn't until I learned into like my my skills and the things that did give me energy, which is podcasting, because I love how many conversations it is writing. So I really enjoy posting for links and the things that I'm not good at.

Speaker 2

And I can stay consistent up because essentially I had another conversation yesterday about this. And like consistency compounds and we can only really stay consistent unless you are super disciplined, which I am not. You can stay consistent at the things you are energized by, something stuck in your energy. The chances are you can record a couple of podcast episodes, get frustrated, and then be like, oh, can't do it anymore.

Speaker 2

And then you were a lot easier to, right? And that's not a bad thing to quit if it's not, if it's sucking your energy, but it also you have to be very honest for yourself because there will be some people that will continue to continue and keep putting their heads against the wall and think, oh my God, why can't I get this right?

Speaker 2

And it's, well, because it's not giving you anything back.

Speaker 3

Absolutely. And and it's one thing that you said is you said being really good at naturally being good at it. And this is different from a skill. When you're naturally gifted and naturally good at something, it's usually it's a strength. And we are bored. We're all born with strengths, but we choose which one to activate during our lives.

Speaker 3

Right. And, skill is something that you learn, you know, you learn the skill of, you know, using Excel or whatever, Matt or I or these are like, of course, it's part of our own learning journeys, but being naturally good at something. So if you're naturally good at writing, then putting energy into that will only create like a virtuous cycle.

Speaker 3

I love speaking so much as well that now, for example, my strategy for Instagram is to do be more present on camera there because it's something that, you know, I want to experience. I want to give myself a shot to like, you know, speak to people and use my voice. So of course, I'm not going to do the polished carousels and everything because this is not for me.

Speaker 3

And LinkedIn also, I love like you because of the writing. So what I mean by that is, to your point is, our, presence online or, when it comes to social media, it needs to make sense. And we need to whatever we do, whether it's like creating a business, being showing up online, anything we eventually we need to be connected to why we're doing it.

Speaker 3

Yeah. Just like generally why are you showing up on what you know. And then when you clear on your why, then of course, on the days where you don't want to show up, you know, you're retired, you're in a way like, it's fine, I'm just going to skip it then, you know, reminding yourself of the why will make you okay.

Speaker 3

Be like, okay, no, actually, I'm I'm going to show up. Even if it's like a short post, it's still better than nothing. And that's also fine. And consistency doesn't mean every day. I think a lot of people confuse that with, you know, showing up all the time. Consistency is whatever it means to you. Like you can be consistent by showing on what's a week, but you show up every single week and that's fine.

Speaker 3

It can mean every day. It can mean other thing.

Speaker 2

Yeah. Because it looks different for everybody. Right? Like this week, for example. I'm really tired and I haven't, haven't post anything on LinkedIn because I've had other things going on in the in my priority. But I've been posting consistent now on LinkedIn for the past year. So it's like, okay, I'm not even if I just missed like three days.

Speaker 2

Okay, no big joke, you know, because I know that soon as I come back like that, consistency is going to carry on because I've already got is a habit for myself. I enjoy it and I can see the growth trajectory of of that, and it's making me excited by where it could potentially go. And just not doing it for a couple of days doesn't mean I'm not consistent.

Speaker 2

It just means that I am. I'm busy. I've got other priorities this week and I will come back to that and then I will continue the consistency. And I think, yeah, people get really, scared, I guess, around the word consistent because they think, oh my God, I have to show up and post every single day and do it, again, sometimes that's a narrative that we hear online.

Speaker 2

And, I think that narrative can be really damaging because actually it usually stops people from being consistent because they burn out before they get to the point where the, the seeing that, that consistency that they could have just from a couple of posts in, in a way that feels really good for them to, to post in, they burn out before they even get the opportunity to see, to see where it could potentially go.

Speaker 2

So yeah, I think I think it's there very, nuanced conversation, though, at around one around consistency that there's a lot of different opinions around what that looks like. But realistically, as long as you are choosing platforms that can help you stay consistent, to show up in a way, a cadence that fits you. And in your own energy, I think that that's the most beneficial way that you can do it.

Speaker 2

And would you say for yourself that you've used your voice and your public speaking as a, as a, marketing channel for your business, or has that been like a different agenda for you?

Speaker 3

It's been a different agenda because initially it started with, you know, all this same beach awareness that I was we think in Singapore and then in Bali, you know, all the things that have organized as well. But then with time, like topics, regular topics, games, I developed a few keynotes and it was very climate focused.

Speaker 3

So I think my identity got very much attached to, you know, all the sustainability training that I was doing in corporate and all of this. And then, I started all this work with women and, you know, loving it so much. And I started like developing workshops for them. And I developed the keynote this year on the, on, you know, taking action and all this.

Speaker 3

And I think at the end of the day, I realized that I it that it was not about CBT. It's like I am who I am. I love to push people into action. That's all that I do all day. And it brings me a lot of joy. And I think it's like bringing back the fun element into it.

Speaker 3

Because eventually, like those corporate training that I was doing, I got like a bit tired of them. Like same topics on I'm going to repeat for the hundredth time that, you know, like, this is what they could do and all this. And I think it's really important that to accept that we are evolving human beings. And that's okay, that, you know, if there's something you were speaking about that brought you a lot of energy, you know, back in the days, it doesn't necessarily fit your agenda as much today, then it's fine.

Speaker 3

Like read on new things and listen to like, those topics that energize you as well. So yeah, I think my speaking journey, I mean, speaking, it has always been part of what I do, you know, whether it's training, whether it's like being on stage, whether it's like, like this, this is speaking like being on the podcast as well.

Speaker 3

And that has always been a medium where I'm genuinely, genuinely happy. Like when every day it's like you've even that kind of this kind of makes me happy. So I think it's also realizing that this is really what, brings me so much energy because, really, like, I think an honest question pushing us themselves is like, what would you do, you know, on the weekend, you know, even without money being in the equation, that would still bring you a lot of energy.

Speaker 3

Right? And this is something that I could do on weekends and pro bono, because initially I couldn't get paid for this because I was tied to my visa and my company. So I was not allowed to invoice, but I would still call and invite people to my house and present something to them. I would still go within corporates and deliver things to their employees.

Speaker 3

Even though I was not paid, I was genuinely so fulfilled by it. So yeah, I think when you can pinpoint that, then you know the journey is much more fun because then eventually you get paid for.

Speaker 2

Doing these things. Yeah, exactly. I think that's a really good way to look at it. It's like, how can I, you're not necessarily doing it for the money, right? Like it's like it's you're doing it cause you're passionate about it. You're doing it because it's something you love. And I think this is this is a question I have around, particularly public speaking, because we know that public speaking and putting yourself in certain environments and rooms and showing up on stages, composition, you're in a certain way to benefit your business.

Speaker 2

And I think that that's amazing and that should, should be used. But I'm also starting to look at it from the other perspective and say, well, am I? Is that also a part of it where, for example, myself, if I wanted to show up, is it just for me? Is it just for my benefit? Or am I also because I just want to serve?

Speaker 2

I just want to like support. I want to show somebody something that I maybe know and they don't like. And I'm I'm thinking about it because I do also like speaking. And I've done a couple of speaking gigs that the ones that I've done in the past, I've almost done it for myself and no one to, like, prove myself that I can do it too, because I wanted to have the name of work or speaking on my credentials or whatever.

Speaker 2

But I'm interested on the other side of it. Like the kind of like when, when you see how people speak, like, how do you perceive that? Do you think it's mainly for for their benefit, or are they also doing it for the audience's benefit?

Speaker 3

But I think it depends on everyone. But my mindset shifted, actually before my tricks, because, I started getting really nervous about it. And, and I remember a dear, dear friend of mine who has been on like a lot of stages, like hundreds of them. She said to me, you know, we tend to think that public speaking is about you because you're the one delivering the message.

Speaker 3

But at the end of the day, it's for that one person who will listen and be connected to what you have to share. And this will genuinely help them, you know, have an impact on them, whatever positive impact it has. And then it kind of shifted my perspective that it's so easy to, like, make it all about you and yourself and being like, super good at it and be like, look at me, look at me.

Speaker 3

I'm like speaking on this stages and everything. But at the end of the day, like, what is it that you're so like that you want people to, get from you? You know, because I, you know, speaking is one way of channeling that it can be through writing. Like you could write a book and still deliver the same kind of message to people.

Speaker 3

It can be true. Like now, right now, podcasting, it can be true. I don't know, like different kind of mediums where, it's really going back to, what what is that message, you know, what do you want to share? Because if it's speaking just for the sake of speaking like, what's the point?

Speaker 2

Like, why do you put yourself through that?

Speaker 3

Yeah, exactly. So it's like going back to that one message or one, kind of impact that you want to have on people. So for me, it's that red thread of pushing people into action. So through my words, if there's one person in the audience that can do something tomorrow based on what I had to share, then I usually like, you know, really activate them like when I do speaking, even if it's a keynote, I try to activate as much as I can and I mean, like my it actually was a different kind of message, different kind of audience.

Speaker 3

And I'm like, you know, if there's one young person in this audience that got something from me and they want to go back to nature tomorrow, even though they live in the city, they're super connected. That's like for me, it's like, okay, mission accomplished. So yeah, I think it's like trying to shift your mindset into making it less about you and more about your audience, but you can still make it about yourself because you still want to improve, right?

Speaker 3

You want to make sure because you can have a really cool message to share. Of course, if you're delivering some great if you're like, super nervous, if you like, speak or use something, we're going to like, of course we won't understand if you're so it needs to make sure that it learns, and for this, then it needs to be a work on yourself as well.

Speaker 3

Working on your voice, your posture, the way you use your hands, and so many other things, of course. So yeah, I think it's a bit of both.

Speaker 2

Yeah, it can work both ways. Right. I was just interested. I've literally it's just been something on my mind. So it's interesting to hear someone else's perspective on it. Because I've been thinking a lot about it, like, because I actually similar like what you said at the beginning around, you had like, a visual of yourself.

Speaker 2

Speaking of stages, I've had that visual previously before in, like, I did like a past life regression activation session or something. And that came up for me in that session, and I'm like, okay, interesting. Because, like, I don't have a conscious goal to be a speaker. But I do enjoy speaking and I don't think I'm terrible at speech.

Speaker 2

He does. So I do enjoy I do enjoy kind of getting up and talking. So I'm just I'm like, in my head I'm like, okay, is that with either me or with me for like the purpose of someone else? So I'm like, I'm having that conversation with myself at the moment. So thank you for your perspective on that.

Speaker 2

I appreciate it's good to hear there from somebody else that's curious.

Speaker 3

And you know how you can know if it's for you? It's I, I generally encourage people to, start with, you know, start with the people that they know and create the occasion for yourself. Like, one of the things I've done is rehearse with my friends for my third. So I invited five people all the time at home.

Speaker 3

Speaker 3

And I prepared a real thing, like with my computer and like slides and everything. And eventually I basically created occasion for me to check if this is this was something for me, basically. You know what I mean? So if at the end of those two hours I felt, I don't know, not energized or feel a bit blocked or not really great, then, okay, I know it's not me for you, that topic yourself for me, that kind of delivery company.

Speaker 3

And so I think it's kind of like going back to if you're not really sure, then maybe even before creating something like that, just closing your eyes and visualizing yourself doing it, and just see how what kind of sensations come in your body. I think that's such a powerful way. Also to validate or invalidate something as well, because if it like if I genuinely believe like if it was a smile on your face, then you know, like that's, that's a, that you have something to, you know, that you should be you know, like, yeah.

Speaker 2

I agree and your body knows. Right. Your body knows what's right and wrong for you. So you can definitely trust your body signals if you're in tune with your body. I think that's really important to listen to. And I want to give you slightly divert away from like the public speaking piece because you observe the how activate people into like moving before they're ready.

Speaker 2

And I'm very much all about that. Like I would say on the queen of pushing someone out that comfort zone kind of thing. I love I've loved doing that, like over my life, because I like to push myself out of my comfort zone. So I also know how to push other people out of it. And I really want to hear from your side.

Speaker 2

Like, what does that look like in practice? Like, how are you helping people kind of take action before they're ready?

Speaker 3

Good question. I usually I okay, I'm I'm myself like, there's no I mean, there's a framework that came out with time, but generally it started with me having conversations with women, having those women share with me, you know, some of the goals they had or some of their vision. And I would just be like, okay, why not?

Speaker 3

Like, what can you do? You know, just start making them happen. And then we would brainstorm together and everything. And eventually I, created my own framework. With mentorship that I could push. And it has three steps, which is one is to be clear on, you know, who you want to become and your vision. I think that's really important because then you're connected to why you're doing this.

Speaker 3

And then second is increasing your self belief. And last one is we take action on it, like taking a leap that is scary excited. That's very important. Like point because it needs to make you feel like a bit cringe, almost a bit like, oh my God, I'm really doing this. But the thought is also exciting. Like the thought of doing it is also exciting.

Speaker 3

And this is like, that's, what I always say is like, fear is a good sign, but there's fear and fear as well. So yeah, that's how I, I do it so it can be like an initial conversation. Like just last week we had a brunch with a bunch of ladies and then we had a conversation with one, and she showed me how she wanted to write more.

Speaker 3

And I'm like, okay, then why not? Oh, but I don't have the time. I'm like, well, time is what you make a priority of. She's like, yeah, you're right. I'm like, okay, how much will you spend on Instagram this weekend? And she's like, I don't know, maybe two, three hours. I'm like, okay, how much time we do need for that article that you want to write?

Speaker 3

I need 30 minute. Okay. Will you do the math? This is like, oh my God, yes, I have no excuse. And then she was like, oh my God, you're better than my therapist. It was really funny, this one up to that conversation. Three hours later, it was published. Wow. So sometimes people like, I genuinely believe that they have everything they need.

Speaker 3

Like they have the skills, the talents, the passion, the wants, the desire, anything. You can name it, but they need someone to call out on the excuses. Usually because you know the excuses you have for certain fears. And and yeah, it's important to like I usually act as a mirror in a way. So of course everyone's different.

Speaker 3

Everyone's at different levels of the journey. So that's why I've made my mentorship evolved a bit, because sometimes, you know, women come to me and they they're not clear on their vision, like, at all. So I help them on that. Sometimes I really clear like, you know, exactly what they want, but they themselves like, they, they're like they lost confidence.

Speaker 3

And so yeah, I really held down that sometimes it's really about the action part. Like just activating them, believing in them. Like that's what I believe. It's like you need to believe it's the person before they believe in themselves. And that's what I had with my mom. Like she believed in me before. I believe in myself. And yeah, that was the push that I needed.

Speaker 3

Because when you did tell them, like, well, I believe you can do it like Jen, you can see it in their eyes how like their expression, their energy. Things change because you believe in them. And yeah, and sometimes that's all they.

Speaker 2

Yeah. It's true. I think you you you need to either believe in yourself or you need someone to push you to not tell you that they believe in you because otherwise it's just it is almost impossible to take the action. That is like the fundamental underlying thing that you need, I'd say, to, to be able to take action.

Speaker 2

And I did it. I hosted a business bootcamp in June, so I think it was. And in that session I was asking people like everybody that was like very beginner at business. I hadn't really taken any action. They probably had been sitting on their ideas for 6 to 12 months. I was like, why have none of you taken any action yet?

Speaker 2

And it was like, I haven't got the time. Procrastination. I'm not making that priority. I'm like, I literally said the exact date, the exact same example that you did it. Like, hey, how long you spending on Instagram? Every week? Oh dude, three hours. Okay, cool. Well, take that suit for hours and put it in starting a business and they've got no excuses.

Speaker 2

Don't happen any time. Like, time is literally just just an excuse and we will make up excuses, make up excuses, makeup excuses just to stop us doing something because we don't have the self-belief, or we haven't got someone's had an answer, but we can we can do this. So I think, yeah, it's super, super important to have that person in your corner that's going to help force you to step outside your comfort zone, because I course made this not happen in the comfort zone.

Speaker 2

It happens outside or in the journey towards the outside. And I think it's really important that we do take these leaps because also that is what builds self chastise, what's out build self-belief is like taking the action, doing something, saying that it's safe is okay and then we don't need to have fear around it and then we can continue taking the action as well.

Speaker 2

And that helps us stay outside of the comfort zone and keep it.

Speaker 3

Absolutely. And I want to go back to like also there's action and action like what I really encourage them to do is to think of like that first baby step that will allow them to, you know, create momentum for themselves. And also sometimes, like, it's so easy to overcomplicate and overengineered, the thing in your mind. Like I remember one of the workshops that I've done, like recently for a group of women, was there was this woman who wanted to do she's a like a coach for parent unconscious parenting, and she wanted to do a webinar, for parents, you know, teach them about whatever topic.

Speaker 3

And she'd been sitting on the idea for six months. And this is just a webinar, like we're talking about something like one hour session. Anyways, I asked her, okay, what would be your next step? I said, oh, I can find design slides. And I'm like, no, no. What could be like, think, pretend that it's the I don't know, like, okay, well, I will help you.

Speaker 3

When would you like to do it? Yeah. Oh my God. I was like, yes, this is your first step. It's just think of one day, okay? I don't know. Let me check my calendar. Okay. I could do this day. I still remember the day that she was like, okay, I'm going to do that Wednesday in like three weeks time, am I okay?

Speaker 3

Great job. It a meeting. You have a date any time. That's your first step. What can be your second set which I don't know. Well go back to the slide. I'm like do. The second phase is having people join. So create a Luma link or Eventbrite or whatever you want to use and put a description and trust the process.

Speaker 3

The content is already in your mind. This is literally your work. Like you already know what you want to tell to these people, but making sure that they come and they are aware of that event if that's down on you. And then afterwards that event happened, and then she made others and then created momentum for herself. Like, you know, it should be even a physical one.

Speaker 3

And also so she just needed to think like, give yourself permission to, you know, put it down. Like, let's put it down in the agenda. That's your first step. So sometimes it's as simple as that. Yeah. And having accountability to someone of course, because I really made her send me the link the next day I was like, okay, I want to see the link in my website things.

Speaker 2

And yeah.

Speaker 3

I thought accountability does help as well.

Speaker 2

Yeah, accountability is big. And I think, yeah, like you say, people try and go from A to Z without going from Abcdefg like they're literally just want a fast track to the end thing or the thing they should be doing, when actually that's usually not the process. To take baby steps. And then you'll eventually get to that, but it's going to take a little bit of time and you have to take the action to get that.

Speaker 2

It's I appreciate you sharing that story. And anybody that is struggling right now to step outside of my comfort zone, to take action. Someone that's like in business, that knows that they've got more potential or knows that they have something that let sit on for a while. What would you suggest that they do exactly that.

Speaker 3

Think of that mini mini mini time step. When I shared how I did this workshops and boom, how did you think I had stranger come to my. They had to come from somewhere, right? Well, they came from the Facebook post that I had done at that time in a Facebook group. I chose one group intentionally and I posted and I thought to myself, well, at least I'm trying.

Speaker 3

I'm going to post about my intention at the. So I want to those people who are sitting on something to just think of that first step, that literally nothing, and you have everything to gain from that and not think to it's like it's barely going to take you off either a few minutes with yourself to think or whatever, but these should be really extremely easy that you can do in less than 24 hours.

Speaker 3

So yeah, I would increase definitely from from that because you never know from that place, like the kind of ripple you can create for yourself. It can be quite like from that one post I got, women gave me their interest, 46 of them. Like commented on the post. From there, I messaged them on the end. From there I gave them.

Speaker 3

They organized the workshops, did a few feel for my confidence because I had to create slides and present them, and I got feedback and everything from there. I told people about what I was doing. From there someone messaged me saying, can you do this for 60 employees? From there, I've done it for employees. And I was like, oh my God, I can do this.

Speaker 3

The corporates from there that planted the seed like you could like you can see the ripple that came out of it. It's like wild, right? Where did it start? One tiny Facebook in a group. But that's it.

Speaker 2

You just took like a baby step action. And then it's it's compounded and grown and swelled up of what you probably even imagined it could be. So that's amazing. And I think so many people can can run with that really simple advice, honestly. Like, yes, people overcome. We overcome. Having humans overcomplicate absolutely everything. And really all we need to do is look at the one little tiny step in front of us as we do every single day when we are walking in straight line.

Speaker 2

And that is literally just the metaphor for everything else in life that we need to really simplify. But we forget daily. And one thing we consciously need to remind ourselves over and over and over again, that does not need to be as complicated as we make it. So thank you for that reminder. I thank you for sharing everything you've shared today.

Speaker 2

Usually with this podcast is all about freedom, and I want to, close by asking you the question, what does freedom look like for you right now in this phase of life?

Speaker 3

It's a bit similar. I think joining my to the side of success, which is being in alignment with yourself. So having the freedom to do the things that you want to be doing and take action on them, give yourself a chance and always been aligned with yourself. If something lights you up and being able to go for it.

Speaker 3

For me, that's freedom.

Speaker 2

Amazing and beautiful. And if anyone wants to connect with you today, how is the best way for them to do that?

Speaker 3

I'm a very much of a LinkedIn girl, but becoming an Instagram girl now, I'm starting a challenge I started yesterday. So yeah, Instagram or LinkedIn and any will do.

Speaker 2

Amazing and perfect. Thank you so much. It was great chatting to you and thanks so much for sharing everything you shared.

Speaker 3

Thank you. Thank you sir. Thank you. Bye.

Sophie

What I love today about this conversation with Aliya is that how simple she made being visible sound? You don't need a fully formed action plan, a polished slide deck, or permission from anyone else to start being seen. You just need to take one tiny, unglamorous first step and put a date in your calendar that you're actually going to commit to.

Sophie

In this episode, nudge something in you to start taking action on the ideas that you've been sitting on and probably overcomplicating in your mind. Take it as your sign to write down one tiny step to date and put a date next to it so you actually start committing yourselves to taking action. And if you want more of this, come and find me on LinkedIn.

Sophie

Everything I share there goes hand in hand with what we talked about here. And like I mentioned at the beginning, if you are struggling to take action in actually starting your online business, come and join me in the Freedom Business Bootcamp. The link is in the description. Thanks so much for joining me today. If you love this episode, please don't forget to like and subscribe on your chosen podcasting platform.

Sophie

And I will see you in the next one.