Dr. Emily is back solo in this Emotional Push-Up to share some of the best advice she’s ever received: in order to handle life’s uncertainties you have to trust that your future self can handle future problems. Listen now to hear just how powerful this advice can be and how you can use it to alleviate some present anxiety. 

Thank you for listening! Staying emotionally fit takes work and repetition. That's why the Emotionally Fit podcast with psychologist Dr. Emily Anhalt delivers short, actionable Emotional Push-Ups every Tuesday and Thursday to help you build a better practice of mental health. Join us to kickstart your emotional fitness. Let's flex those feels and do some reps together!

Follow Dr. Emily on Twitter, and don’t forget to follow, rate, review and share the show wherever you listen to podcasts! #EmotionallyFit 

The Emotionally Fit podcast is produced by Coa, your gym for mental health. Katie Sunku Wood is the show’s producer from StudioPod Media with additional editing and sound design by nodalab, and featuring music by Milano. Special thanks to the entire Coa crew!

Ready to break an emotional sweat? Welcome to Emotionally Fit with me, Dr. Emily Anhalt. As a therapist, I know that staying mentally healthy takes work and repetition. That's why I'll share Emotional Push-Ups, short, actionable exercises to help you strengthen your mental fitness. From improving your friendships to managing stress, let's flex those feels and do some reps together!

Hey there Fit Fans! I'm back today with a solo episode to share with you the number one best piece of advice that I have ever received. This is a more personal story than you might normally hear from me, but this advice has just been too impactful not to share far and wide. Specifically, it centers around how to deal with anxiety and uncertain futures.

Essentially, many, many years ago, I had a close family member who was in the hospital for about a month. Things looked really dire. It didn't look like this person was going to make it. Every night for that month, the doctors told us that they were unlikely to live through the night. Then every morning they somehow did. It was a real rollercoaster of anxiety and anticipatory grief. Of course, I was really distraught. I was still young and dependent on this person.

One evening a family friend came over to keep us company. This friend, his name was Bill, was an oncologist, so he had a lot of experience with families who were facing uncertainty and potential loss. I sat down with him that evening and I said, "Bill, what am I going to do if this person dies? I feel like I won't be able to handle it. I feel like I will just cease to exist if it happens." Bill put his hand on my shoulder and he looked me in the eyes and he said, "Emily, the version of you that will handle that terrible thing, if and when it happens, will be born into existence in that moment, and that version of you will have more life experience and more context and more capacity to handle that terrible thing than you do now. It makes sense that current you doesn't know how you'd handle it, but future you will figure it out. You have to trust your future self to handle future problems."

He said, "What you're going through right now is already so painful and you know as hard as it is, you're handling it. So just like past you might not have known how you'd get through this moment, but present you is figuring it out, present you needs to trust that future you will do the same."

Now, this just completely blew my mind wide open. This idea that I should trust my future self made so much sense to me, and it released me of the burden of trying to figure out how to handle something that hadn't even happened yet. This advice has helped me through all kinds of really tough moments like that one, but it's also helped me through smaller everyday moments of anxiety. Pretty much any time I think, "What am I going to do if I get COVID? What am I going to do if I fail at this project? What am I going to do if I miss the bus?" I can remind myself, "You know what? Future me is a badass. She will figure it out."

That's it, Fit fans. I hope this advice might help you next time you're feeling anxious about an uncertain future. I hope you can remind yourself to trust that future version of yourself to get through it.

Thanks for flexing those feels with me today. If this episode was helpful, use the hashtag #emotionallyfit to tell me about your reaction. Have a good day.

Thanks for listening to Emotionally Fit hosted by me, Dr. Emily Anhalt. New Push-Ups drop every Tuesday and Thursday. Did you do today's Push-Up alongside me and my guest? Tweet your experience with the hashtag #EmotionallyFit and follow me at @DrEmilyAnhalt. Please rate, review, follow and share the show wherever you listen to podcasts. This podcast is produced by Coa, your gym for mental health, where you can take live, therapist-led classes online. From group sessions to therapist matchmaking, Coa will help you build your emotional fitness routine. Head to joincoa.com, that's join-c-o-a.com, to learn more. And follow us on Twitter and Instagram at @joinCoa. From StudioPod Media in San Francisco, our producer is Katie Sunku Wood. Music is by Milano. Special thanks to the entire Coa crew!