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Getting out of our comfort zone is one of the toughest things we can do, but it’s super important for growth. In this chat, we dive into why stepping outside our safe spaces can lead to amazing new experiences and opportunities. I share some personal stories, like how my daughter Kembra had a hard time moving past a simple game level because she was scared to take the plunge. We also talk about how my own journey pushed me to speak publicly, even when I felt terrified. The main takeaway? It's okay to be scared, but just taking small steps can lead to big changes in our lives.

How do you expand your comfort zone without too much risk?

Breaking free from our comfort zones is no walk in the park. It’s often a painful process that forces us to confront our deepest fears. In this episode, I delve into the significance of stepping outside our comfort zones, emphasizing that growth often happens in the spaces where we feel uncomfortable. I share my experiences and the challenges I faced after my injury, which pushed me into scenarios that were previously unfamiliar. This discussion is not just about overcoming fear; it's about understanding the roots of that fear and how it can hold us back from new opportunities.

I also reflect on moments with my daughter and her struggles with video games that relate directly to stepping outside one's comfort zone. Her reluctance to move past familiar levels highlights a common tendency we all have to stick with what we know. We analyze how this behavior can limit our experiences and growth. Through this lens, we tackle the concept of readiness—many think they need to be fully prepared before taking any steps forward, but I argue that action is often the best teacher. Failure and discomfort can provide critical lessons that prepare us for future challenges.

As the conversation progresses, I prompt listeners to think about their own lives and the areas where they might be living too comfortably. I encourage them to identify one small step they can take today, whether it be trying something new, reaching out for support, or simply changing their routine. The essence of this episode is about empowerment and the understanding that stepping out—even in small ways—can lead to significant personal growth. So, let’s embrace discomfort together and see where it takes us!

Takeaways:

• Getting out of our comfort zone is tough, but it's essential for growth and learning.
• We often fear discomfort, but stepping outside our comfort zone helps us to grow stronger.
• It's okay to take small steps out of our comfort zone and not rush the process.
• Comfort zones are safe, but they can hold us back from experiences and opportunities.
• Fear of failure should not stop us from trying new things and learning along the way.
• Remember that even small steps outside our comfort zone can lead to significant personal growth.

How do we get out of our comfort zone?

That's one of the most difficult things we'd ever do.

And the only way you hear all these wonderful quotes everywhere on the Internet about freedom is on the other side of your comfort zone and this wonderful utopian world.

Just if you could only get out of your comfort zone.

Zone.

What does your com.

What is your comfort zone and how do we get out of it?

I'm Stephen Webb, and this is Stillness in the Storms podcast.

And I help you to get through difficult times and give you a little piece of inner peace.

Okay, come for a zone.

But just before I start on that, I'd like to say thank you to my patrons, Farrell, Clint, Cheryl, Yvonne and Maureen.

Thank you guys.

Thank you for supporting what I do.

And if any of you want to become a patron, head over to StephenWeb.com and there's a link at the top two card Patreon.

Otherwise, thank you for listening to this podcast.

Thank you for tuning in.

How's your week been?

My week has been pretty good.

It's so interesting now.

The world's opening up and just there's so much change and there's so much frustration and there's so much anger and fear and, yeah, there's a lot going on this week.

There's a lot of energy.

There's a lot of uncertainty.

And in all this uncertainty, there is this automatic out of our comfort zone.

This is what we don't like.

We don't like being out of our comfort zone.

So I thought I'd do a podcast about comfort zone and about how we step out of it and sometimes, sometimes forcing us into our.

Out of our comfort zone really does help.

But I just want to warn you that I'm not going to be editing my podcast in the same diligent way as I normally do.

So there's going to be more ums and ums.

There's going to be more gaps and pauses because I don't have time or the manpower or the means to be able to get it edited.

You know, being paralyzed from then just below the neck and my fingers, and I've been paralyzed.

It takes me five times longer to do anything an able body can do.

And I've been.

I've been bit conservative on the five times, probably 20 times.

So in order for me to get the podcast out every week, I'm going to do less editing.

So you are.

You are warned.

You are warned.

But come for a zone.

I was talking on my live today about my daughter.

My daughter kemba.

She's now 23, and she used to play this computer game called Spyro.

And she used to play this same level for months and months and months.

And it wasn't even getting through the level.

It was like a pre level running around.

So you will run around on these little fields and jump in this water and over this little bridge and you would choose places to go into to do the levels.

Well, in each one of these levels, there was, like, things you had to do, people you had to jump on and kill and bosses you had to take out.

But she wouldn't go in them.

And I was like, really frustrated.

I was like, no, Cam, you've got to go into these levels.

You're never gonna get further.

You'll end up getting power ups and you jump higher and you can do all these things.

And she's like, no, I'm good.

And I'm like, yeah, but we've watched you play this, this running around, running, jumping into water and jumping out the same area for like weeks now.

Please, can we see a different area?

No, I'm good.

Aren't you bored with playing the same thing?

No, I'm good.

And I really couldn't understand it.

I really got quite frustrated and sometimes I got quite like, well, can be.

You're never going to get anywhere unless you actually just go through the door.

Go on, just go do it now in front of me.

I'll help you.

And I used to be quite like, yeah, frustrated is the right word.

I don't want to make it any stronger.

Because it wasn't.

It never.

It bothered me, but not too much.

It was just I couldn't sit there and watch her for many, for very long.

And I now realize why it was okay understanding what she wasn't doing right or what she should be doing.

I never understood why.

And of course she didn't want Spyro to get hurt.

She didn't want to get hurt.

She didn't want to go through the fear, that feeling of somebody jumping out.

Now.

Then when she was ready, she took the step.

When she was ready and confident and okay to adventure out, she took the step.

It wasn't my business to know when she was ready.

And I want to tell you another story.

Shortly after I broke my neck, I was on the spinal unit.

I had just got out of bed a few weeks previous, so I'd learned to push my chair really quite badly.

It was a manual wheelchair.

It was an NHS one, so it was a good quality because they were our permanent chairs.

But it was also they Weren't lightweight.

They.

Yeah, they were very much a government issued chair and they were heavy.

And because I got no triceps and my hands don't work properly, I could not push the chair in any meaningful way.

I could get the momentum to go forward, but then turning any corner or turning on the spot was incredibly difficult.

To push one wheel one way and the other wheel the other way was like really hard.

And it must have been painful for anybody to watch us do it really slowly.

Well, a group of carers or nurses came to the spinal unit for the day and myself, Alan and Jason were asked to go in and do a small speech, a small chat.

I never done anything like this apart from when I was at school and I wasn't really in any kind of drama class, so standing out in front of anybody, it was just something I did not do, apart from telling the odd joke when I was a child in the, I suppose, greenhouse when we had a barbecue with friends.

But essentially this was something new and I was terrified.

And I can remember the hour came counting down.

What do you want me to talk about?

I said to, like the sister on the ward, well, just talk about what it's like to be first injured, what it's like to be from your perspective of breaking your neck and things like that.

It's like, yeah, but, oh, I don't know, I don't know.

Well, in the end I said, I'll do it, I'll brave, I'll do it.

And I would never have done it unless I had two people with me.

So it came to the time and we pushed our wheelchairs up there, the door open and I was the third in the row.

And pushing ourselves into it was.

It must have been an absolute comedy if it wasn't so painful for us all.

Completely straight face, completely serious.

Jason goes in first now, Jason.

And his arms were longer than his body, I swear.

And they used to wave in every direction.

If there was ever an orangutan in a wheelchair, that was him.

And then there was Alan next.

Alan was very serious, very subdued.

And then there was me.

I don't know what I was.

I had no idea.

I could.

I could see what they were, but I couldn't see who I was.

And Jason pushed himself in first, joking and like.

And there's me.

And then Alan pushed himself in and there was me banging myself into the back of his chair because, like, I wanted to get in as quick as possible, but I did and I.

And I didn't want to be stuck out too far either.

So the balance was basically crashing into the back of his chair, because once I pushed forward, I couldn't stop.

And I went in there, and I managed to turn around on the really low shag pile carpet, and I managed to turn and facing.

There's about 30 people.

And I spoke about the dangers of diving, and I was terrified.

It.

I thought it went absolutely terrible.

I. I was sweating.

I was nervous.

I.

Every word I said, I swear I stuttered because I used to have a terrible stutter.

And then I left, and down on the ward, about 10 minutes later, I don't know, a couple hours later, I have no idea, really.

One of the nurses come down and said, oh, they would like a word with you.

I was like, who?

Oh, one of the people in the audience would like a word with you.

I was like, okay.

I said, you have to push me because it's, like, right up there, and it'll take me, like, 20 minutes to get there.

So the nurse pushed me, and we got up there, and the lady looked up and says, we would like to help you.

I was like, why?

So were you wanting to do some kind of campaign to stop people breaking their necks and do some kind of warning?

We'd done a whip around with some money, and we thought what you said was really powerful.

We thought you were amazing.

I was like.

I thought I was a bloody mess.

It was terrible.

It was, you know, it was so raw.

It was like.

But I guess it was real, you know?

And the.

The point of it is, there was about, I don't know, $18, which would be about 12 pounds in there, and enabled me.

I can't remember what I'd done with it because it was some months before when I come home, but that was, like, 27 years ago.

But the point of getting out of your comfort zone is you don't have to do it all at once.

You don't have to go and jump metaphorically.

You know, your comfort zone is fine for certain situations, but you don't have to be ready.

You don't have to be so perfect and ready to leave your comfort zone.

You know, just like Kembra, my daughter with that game.

And just like me in that room, if I'd waited years and years and years until I was the perfect speaker, I would have done no better.

You know, if Kembra had waited and waited and waited, she would have done no better on the other sheets because she would not have known what she was up against.

The thing is, we have to grow our muscle by doing.

We have to leave our comfort zone.

You know, we have to put on a different movie.

If we're a child, we have to stop rewrite, redoing the same day again and again and again.

And it's really difficult.

It's not easy to do something different.

And this is why in this time of lockdown, in this time of unrest, we fear discomfort.

You know, the greatest love you can give a child is comfort, security, love, and safety.

You know, we almost ask our children to stay safe, not to get out of the comfort zone.

Don't do anything that's going to hurt you when, really.

And then when a child goes out and they do something that hurts them, we're like, why did you do that?

Why did you climb on that?

So we almost want everybody.

And we get taught not to go out of our comfort zone.

You know, I'm not saying run and jump.

I'm not saying dive off a tall wall into a swimming pool like I did.

I'm saying go down the road on the push bike that you're not used to doing.

I'm saying read the book, watch the movie, learn something different.

If someone's offering you an opportunity, take it and learn along the way.

If you want to start up a business, you don't need to know about taxes and all the how to register a business, design a logo.

If you want to do public speaking, you don't have to be a perfect public speaker.

If you want to do Facebook lives, if you want to start up a podcast, you don't have to have all the perfect equipment.

You don't have to have the gift of the gap.

You just have to start.

You just have to.

You know, if you want to do a podcast, just record five minutes talking about your favorite subject.

You don't have to decide your whole podcast all 120 episodes.

The problem is we look so far down the road and we think we cannot get there, so we don't bother.

Getting out of your comfort zone is not about having the perfect sharpened sword.

It's about knowing that you're going to learn along the way.

It's about knowing that failure is okay.

Failure is learning.

I can list all the times where I've put out something that's just terrible.

Look back at my first lives.

Look back at things I was doing three or four years ago.

You know, I was where I was.

And jumping out of their comfort zone has given me more confidence in recording this podcast.

You know, every podcast, I'm slightly out of my comfort zone.

Every life, I'm slightly out my Comfort zone.

If I get too comfortable, then I'm not learning, I'm not growing.

I know comfort feels good and I know fear feels terrible, but we should have fear recognize the fear and go, it's okay.

I'm not going to go all the way.

I'm just going to take a step, dip my toe in, so to speak.

You know, that's wisdom.

Dip your toe in, check the depth of the water.

You know, I'm joking about that.

I'm laughing at the time only because I broke my neck in the swimming pool.

When I dived in, it was the deep end.

It was lit up and it was full of water.

There's so many rumors about my accident over the years.

They're just funny, you know, he must have been drunk.

The pool was empty.

He.

It was the shallow end.

None of those things are true.

What's true is I was a dumbass and I was showing off.

That's the Dhruf.

But that's okay.

When we're younger, we haven't got a defined comfort zone so much as we have when we're older.

So hopefully my.

A couple of stories have helped you recognize your comfort zone, recognize the comfort zone in others.

And just think today, how much do you miss out on staying in your comfort zone?

Where in your life are you just staying in your comfort zone because it feels good to you?

What things have you said no to that you don't believe you had the ability or capacity to learn, to be able to grow into that role?

And there's many things I've said no to and knocked back.

There's, there's people I would like to have on this podcast as people I would like to interview, but I don't message them just in case they say yes.

What happens if I message like Richard Rohr and say, come on my podcast, Brilliant Franciscan Priests.

That would just be amazing conversation.

What would happen if I messaged him and said, would you come on my podcast?

What would happen if he said yes?

That would mean I'd be out my comfort zone.

I'd have to grow.

And now here's the problem.

I now have to email him and ask him, don't I?

If any of you know Richard Rohr, tell him that I'm trying to get out of my comfort zone.

I would love for him to come on my podcast.

You know, a genuine, such an open hearted, warm, loving character taught me so much about the true self, false self, the.

The falling upwards, the first and second half of life.

But yeah, comfort zone, it's hilarious.

So get out of your comfort zone.

Head over to stevenweb.com and click to have a chat with me.

I don't charge, it's donation based only.

And see if I can help you if maybe you have anxiety or depression as a visitor at the moment and you're struggling with finding inner peace in this uncertain, difficult time.

And I get it.

I get it.

There's no shame in feeling all those things at the moment.

There's no shame in feeding them anytime.

So yeah, head over to stephenweb.com click on either.

Become a patron if you would like to support and get the more inside stuff of what I do, the stuff that's not available elsewhere.

Take care.

Have a wonderful day.

And the website stephenweb.com Bye Sam.