Ever wondered what advice you’d give your past self? Well, today’s episode dives into just that, as I reflect on the 52 lessons I’ve learned over the past year of podcasting and being single. Spoiler alert: it’s not just about dating; these nuggets of wisdom cover everything from self-discovery to the quirks of life with a cat. I mean, who knew being single could come with such a treasure trove of revelations? We’ll chat about the importance of starting new things, the healing power of pets, and how the journey of self-growth can change your dating pool—even if it gets a bit smaller! So grab your favorite drink, kick back, and let’s explore these lessons together.

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Sitting down with our past selves is a pretty wild concept, right? It’s like a time travel therapy session where you get to dish out advice to your past self, or maybe just remind them to wear sunscreen. In the latest episode of All About Being Single, Wioleta takes us on a reflective journey as she celebrates her podcast's one-year anniversary. Can you believe it? A whole year of weekly chats about the single life! She’s not just patting herself on the back, though. With a list of 52 lessons learned over the past year, she dives into what being single has taught her beyond dating and relationships. For instance, she shares how embarking on new projects can feel daunting but is ultimately rewarding. And hey, if you’ve ever wanted to start something but felt stuck, Wioleta's here to tell you – just go for it! Whether it’s starting a podcast or picking up a new hobby, starting is often the hardest part, but it’s also where the magic happens. As she continues to unpack her lessons, Wioleta emphasizes the importance of inner work. It’s like self-care on steroids! The more we understand ourselves, the more selective we become about who we surround ourselves with. It’s a double-edged sword; while we might narrow our options, we attract a higher caliber of people. Plus, she reminds us that love evolves. The way we love changes as we grow, and that’s okay! It’s all part of the journey. By the end of the episode, Wioleta encourages listeners to embrace their single status and find joy in their own company. After all, the world is full of possibilities waiting for you to explore. So, grab a cup of coffee and tune in to this heartfelt episode that’s all about growth, self-discovery, and the beauty of being single. In a world that often romanticizes coupledom, Wioleta’s candid reflections provide a refreshing perspective on single life. She highlights the undeniable truth that being single can sometimes be tough, especially when the desire for companionship is strong. Yet, she also asserts that it’s a chance for profound personal growth. As she shares her insights, we see her grappling with the realities of being single and what that means for her identity. She candidly discusses how societal pressures and expectations can weigh heavily on single individuals. But instead of wallowing in the stigma, she flips the narrative, encouraging a mindset shift. Wioleta invites listeners to embrace the lessons learned during their single years. From finding solace in furry friends (shoutout to all the cat lovers) to recognizing that not everyone’s advice is worth taking, she provides a plethora of wisdom. This episode is not just a celebration of her podcast milestone but also a rallying cry for all singles to cherish their journey and the lessons that come with it. After all, every experience, whether good or bad, shapes who we are. Tune in for a dose of empowerment, some laughs, and a reminder that you are not alone on this journey!

Takeaways:

• Reflecting on our past selves can lead to valuable insights for personal growth and self-improvement.
• Starting something can be the toughest hurdle, but it’s crucial to just dive in and see where it takes you.
• Having a pet, especially a cat, brings immense joy and healing, as they really have a special way of lifting our spirits.
• Being single can be a journey filled with lessons that shape our understanding of relationships and self-worth.

If you could sit down with yourself one year ago, what would you tell her? Or him, if you're a guy. Hi, welcome back to All About Being Single. Or welcome if you're new here. And I'm Wioleta, your host.

This is the 52nd episode, meaning I've been putting out weekly episodes for a full year and I just can't believe it. I can't believe I've had my own podcast for a whole year and that I still keep showing up every week, no matter how difficult my life has been.

And the last few months have definitely been pretty challenging as far as my time goes.

So I'm just extra, extra proud of myself and I'm very thankful that you guys are on this cool little road or whatever you want to call it with me today's episode. Because again, it's 52. Episode 52. I wrote down.

Well, the last few weeks I've been kind of writing down like 52 things that I've learned since starting the podcast.

And these might not be fully about being single, and I feel like most almost aren't, but they're coming from someone who has been single and didn't even go on a single day during this whole past year. So they're basically reflections from a single person who learned these while being single, aka me. Okay, here they are. 1.

If you build it, they will come. 2. Starting is the hardest obstacle, but once you start, you can keep going or decide to stop.

If you don't like the thing, it's that it's maybe not for you. So if you have an idea for something, just start creating. 3. Having a cat is so healing.

At this point, I truly believe that cats were sent to us by a spiritual being because they're also spiritual beings. 4. Men or women who frequent bars often is just so low level, and I can't believe it took me a very long time to truly, fully realize that. 5.

Being wanted isn't the same as being valued. 6.

The more inner work you do on yourself, the smaller of a pool of potential candidates you will have, but also in a sense, larger, because more people will be drawn to you, but you'll be more selective. So it's both a good and a bad thing. 7.

There are different kinds of romantic love, and we love people differently throughout different parts of our lives. And I didn't fully, well, obviously didn't fully realize that. 8. No one knows me better than I know myself.

No matter what degrees they have, how many people they've worked with, what their job title is, how much older they are, et cetera. No one on this planet knows more than you do about you. No one. Not your parents, not your partner, not your therapist. No one.

Maybe you're an animal though, because you know, we do tell them a lot of stuff. 9. Sometimes the red flag is how badly you want an unaligned relationship to work. 10. Being single long term, when you don't want to be is traumatic.

I'm going to say it again for those who will say it's not, when they don't even see the ways that it's traumatized them. Being single long term when you don't want to be, when you desire a family of your own and it just keeps not happening to you.

That's fucking traumatic. 11. Most people are even more unwell and unhealed than I initially thought. 12. Everyone has trauma. It's natural.

It's part of the universal human experience. For some it was front loaded. Some get hit more when they're older, but we've all got it. 13.

I've learned to say to myself and mean it when people say things that they're so gung ho about, but I know they're just not right. Hey, that's not my reality. That ain't my fucking reality, whether I say it to them or I just think it to myself. 14.

Single people need more singles only communities.

Not just in the big cities, but also in the suburbs where it's even that much harder to find someone to date because most people in the burbs are coupled up. 15. Ask and you shall receive. And if you don't receive, fuck them. You're meant for more.

Figure out how to get the fuck out of there and find a more suitable situation. 16. None of this matters. And also somehow all of this matters at the same time. 17. Make the S in single stand for selfish.

You and I deserve to be selfish. 18. Being 39 feels like the most surreal age. Seriously, I don't even know how to explain what 39 feels like. 19. Rejection is divine protection. 20.

The healthiest thing you can do is stop trying to be understood by someone committed to misunderstanding you. And if a ton of people misunderstand you, that's okay too.

And sometimes the more people misunderstand you, the more it means you're closer to a truth and they just don't want to believe it. 21. You can want an unconventional life. 22. You can completely change your mind about what you want.

You are allowed to outgrow an identity you spent years building. 23. Sometimes I want things to happen to me just fast, and I realize that they won't just happen the way that I want them to. 24.

Life meets you at your level of audacity. So go after what you want and don't stop till you get it. 25. If doing things out of spite works for you, do it.

Don't let anyone convince you that's an unhealthy way of getting motivated. Maybe the reason will change as you go, maybe it won't, and that's also okay. 26. So we're halfway through.

Somehow it's only the people who haven't dealt with an issue at all ever, or haven't dealt with it successfully that want to give you unsolicited advice on it. Don't listen to their unfounded opinions disguised as advice. 27. You're not too sensitive. Too many people are just insensitive. 28.

I think a lot more of us wake up sometime in our 30s and realize we want to make huge changes in our lives. 29. No one should get married prior to that era of your life happening. Prior to those realizations in your 30s.

You don't even know who you actually are until, I would say personally, until like your mid late 30s. But that's obviously me. Yours might be different. 30. The only person who can fix your internal issues is you.

A lot of the rest is based on luck and maybe some predestined future, if there is such a thing. 31. The thing you think is too embarrassing to talk about is probably the thing someone else needs to hear.

And I know I need to talk about a little bit more of the embarrassing things that have happened to me over the years. 32. It's all of our first time living. We are all living for the first time. 33. Most people are a hot mess and they don't even know themselves.

They're insecure. They don't know what they want. They're just on autopilot. Most people are a hot fucking mess. 34. People do change.

We change if we want to, if we choose to. It's hard work, but it's possible and it's worth it. 35. Money is a tool. So are your looks. Use them as such. 36.

I'd much rather be liked than loved by more people than not. And I know that's a very unpopular opinion. 37. You don't have to know exactly where something is going before you start it. 38.

If someone hasn't been single for at least a year, plus as an adult, they have no leg to stand on when it comes to understanding a single person's life and their quote unquote advice about dating or being single means nothing. 39. Nothing fixes anything better than taking action. 40. Most people have no goals in life and just go with the flow. And that sounds horrible to me. 41.

Anyone who says I wouldn't have done that or I would have done this or if I were you or if it was me, blah blah, blah, blah, no, you wouldn't have shut the fuck up.

It's always pretty much said regarding a situation they've never even had to be in that you're telling them about, and they're trying to tell you how they would have handled the situation kind of better. They're trying to tell you how they would have handled it in a better way. And.

And I bet you they probably would have handled it way worse than you did and would not have done the thing that they pretend they would have done. 42.

Never leave your neck pillow with some of your favorite clothes stuffed inside it, attached to a luggage that you check at the counter at the airport last minute. Ask me how I know. 43. The price of anything is the amount of life you exchange for it and it gets pricier the older you get. 44.

Having a creative hobby is a lot different than other hobbies, and I highly recommend having some kind of a creative hobby. 45. Starting a singles walking club will teach you things you absolutely did not anticipate learning through it. 46.

If you've done it before, you can do it again. 47. And also if you want something you've never had, you have to do things you've never done before. 40. 48.

Being coupled up currently might be better or it might be worse. We just don't know what life could be if something else was our current reality. We just don't know.

And there is no way to know because that's just not our current reality. And we are living in the reality that we have. 49.

It's so cool that we get to live in a world where we could have free mentors who may or may not, you know, we may or may not ever meet, but whom we can learn a lot from.

There's so much knowledge online on YouTube from just people that are in the public eye essentially, and we have so much knowledge from people who have actually done things that we want to do and been where we're trying to go. And we can use that free knowledge. Like we can study it and then use it. It's there, it's there for us to use.

And it's so amazing that that's the part of this world like that's the time in this world that we actually get to benefit from. It's so amazing. 50 We can become self actualized until there is a spiritual component to our lives.

Believing in some kind of higher power, whether it be God or the universe or whatever it is that you know you want to believe in. 51 Just cuz something is good at a time and it's healthy and maybe even helps you heal.

Maybe it's some kind of a building block of some sort and aligned with you at one point doesn't mean it will always be so doesn't mean that it will always be aligned with you.

And 52 so the last one a year ago I thought I was making a podcast and I didn't realize I was kind of gonna be documenting myself, becoming a different version of me. And I think that's it's one of the coolest things about having a podcast. And you know me, I could keep going on and on and on.

But anyhow, if any of this resonates with you or you want me to talk about any of these points more, go to all about being single.com and leave me a voice memo and I'll do my best to honor your request. Also, if you have any questions, suggestions for this pod, let me know. I really want this space to be as much yours as it is mine.

Email me at allaboutbeingsinglemail.com or DM my Instagram account. Thisis violeta. I'm skipping most of our usual segments today, but you know I love me a glow up. So today's glow up is this.

What are some very important life lessons you've learned recently? Just write a few of them down and see if there's any action you can take towards something you want in your life with that newfound knowledge.

Unless you're using that knowledge to some extent, it's all it is, is just knowledge. Please take a moment to rate and review this show.

It means a lot to me that you're listening and it would mean even more if you could mention some of the things you've learned and liked about this podcast. I really want this podcast to reach more people and for it to help others as much as it's helped me.

Thanks so much so much for listening as always, even if we're late, especially with some of these life lessons. We are right on time. Thanks so much for listening and I will talk to you next Tuesday.