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A Grateful Mind Opens Up A Loving Heart - The Demartini Show
Episode 1184th February 2022 • The Demartini Show • Dr John Demartini
00:00:00 00:17:16

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Learn more about the two forms of gratitude, and how gratitude impacts every area of your life. Discover why it's important to prioritize your life on a daily basis to increase your gratitude. Walk away with empowering questions to ask yourself to help you be more inspired, enthused, centered, and grateful.

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Transcripts

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We always think we're victims of history by looking out there thinking

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something's happened to us, but it's our perception of what's out there.

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And we can take whatever's out there in our world and find out how it serves

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what's valuable to us. And that increases our gratitude.

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First I'm gonna say that there a superficial gratitude

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a distinction.

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A superficial gratitude is when things happen to be supporting what you value

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and seems to be going easy and it seems like things are happening in the way

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that you want and you go, 'Thank you. Thank you.

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Thank you.' And it's kinda like a superficial,

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easy dynamic and you don't really feel like there's anything going on that's

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really testing you.

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And then there's a gratitude that occurs when you've actually been challenged in

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what you value, you feel like there's hindrances,

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but then you found out how to perceived it differently or take actions on it

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and actually came through it and had a deep gratitude. And you felt a deep,

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absolutely feeling almost tears of gratitude for the realization that 'Wow,

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I thought there was some sort of apparent chaos,

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but there's actually a hidden order to what's happening.'

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And you got a deep fulfillment coming out of that and a gratitude that came from

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the challenge, not just from the support.

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And both of those forms of gratitude are useful.

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But the one that is actually able to take the challenges and turn 'em into

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gratitudes,

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those are the ones that are most empowering because

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happens in your life, you can turn it into an opportunity.

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But let's look at what gratitude does.

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And then I'll talk about the distinction to those again.

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Gratitude has an impact in your mind. Actually

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the prefrontal cortex,

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the medial prefrontal cortex in the forebrain is not only called the executive

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center, but it's also called the gratitude center.

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Because whenever you're doing something that's deeply meaningful,

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truly inspiring, highest in value,

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things that are really highest in priority in your life,

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the thing you feel is meaningful and purposeful in your life,

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that's when you end up having the highest degree of gratitude.

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And you have the most resilience, most adaptability to whatever happens.

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And you're able to see whatever you think is on the way, not in the way.

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So you're able to see how whatever challenges you

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what you want. You're able to see under, go through it, underneath it, around,

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over above it, to get the outcome you want.

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And that type of gratitude is very profound.

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And that's occurring whenever you feel that anything is connected to what you

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value most. And let me just go off on a little tangent here.

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You have three things you have control of in your life, your perception,

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decisions, and actions.

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If you take command of your actions and prioritize your actions to the very

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highest priorities,

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you're going to have the highest probability of having the most gratitude.

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Cause whenever you're living by highest priorities, the blood glucose,

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oxygen goes in the forebrain, activates the medial prefrontal cortex,

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the gratitude center, and you easily see gratitude.

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You know when you've done a day,

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when you've got the highest priorities knocked out,

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you're more resilient and adaptable, you're more fulfilled, more grateful,

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you can handle almost anything.

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But when you're putting fires out and you're doing lower priority things and

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feel like you're trapped and overwhelmed by extrinsic, you know,

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fires you feel whoa, and you're a bear and you're ungrateful. So,

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if you're not living by high priorities, you're going to be less grateful.

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And so you can take command of that.

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You can sit down and decide what is the highest priority action I can do today

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to help me fulfill my mission on earth, to help me serve the most people,

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to be able to fulfill my life? But you can also do that on your perceptions.

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And the perceptions are you can ask;

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how is no matter what's happened in my life today,

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how's it helping me get what I really want to do?

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How's it helping me fulfill my mission? My priorities,

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my most important things in life, what I feel is most fulfilling?

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Asking yourself, how specifically is whatever's happening,

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helping me fulfill what's most meaningful to me, what's most inspiring,

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my purpose, the thing that I want to do that serves the world?

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If you ask that question and answer it, not sit down and go, 'I don't know.

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I can't see it.

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It's in my way.' But be accountable and find out how it's linked.

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The moment you link it,

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you neuroplastically reopen up your brain back into the frontal cortex and back

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in the gratitude center. And then you see the hidden order in the chaos,

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and then you're in command and you're not a victim of history,

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you now master of your destiny. By asking;

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how specifically is whatever's happening,

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helping me fulfill what's most important to me, my highest priority?

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You master both of 'em. You can master your motor actions.

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You can master your sensory perceptions.

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And then knowing when to make the decisions on which one you're gonna do.

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Am I either gonna go prioritize my actions or am I prioritize my perceptions?

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Either go do what you love through delegating or love what you do through

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linking I call it.

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Linking means asking how specifically is this action gonna help me fulfill my

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mission and linking that action with that experience,

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that sensory perception to what's most important. If you do that,

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you have command and you increase your gratitude. Now gratitude, what that does,

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when you're in that prefrontal cortex, you have less noise in the brain.

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You're more creative, you're more solution oriented.

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You actually feel purposeful. You have meaning in life.

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You have more fulfillment, you're more inspired. You're more leader oriented.

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You're living by design, not duty.

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And your mental capacities are more heightened.

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You wake up more of a genius. And in your business,

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when you're in gratitude like that,

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you're more resilient and adaptable to whatever happens.

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You're also more in fair exchange. You're more objective.

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So you're more likely to think about your customer in a fair way.

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Because if you look down in your customer, not meet their needs,

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you learn a lesson, you get humbled.

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And if you look up and sacrifice your profits, you get, it doesn't work.

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You learn to have objectivity in a balanced state.

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When you're living by your highest values you're more objective and more neutral

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about that, and more fair in your exchange. So from a business perspective,

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you're gonna grow your business, you know, less noise in the brain, more genius.

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And in your finances, when you're able to manage your emotions,

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when you're living by your highest values, you're less volatile, less emotional,

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less blood supply down into the amygdala, less predator prey oriented,

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less impulse instinct oriented, less distracted, you're more focused.

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When I asked in the 1980s,

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what was the most common thing people were facing in their life? It was,

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they were having hard time staying focused on what it is that was important to

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them, they're easily getting distracted.

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If you're not prioritizing your life and sticking to highest priority things,

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you're gonna be inundated with other things. In fact,

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if you don't fill your day with high priority actions that inspire you,

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that brings gratitude to you,

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your day's gonna fill up with low priority distractions that bring ingratitude.

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So that's how important it is. And that's the way it is when it comes to money.

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People who can't manage their money,

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it's because they can't manage their emotions because they're in their amygdala

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and they're not in their executive function.

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So if you prioritize your actions and prioritize the actions that help build

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wealth, automatic, your savings and investments,

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and automatically serve people in ever greater numbers,

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you'll grow your finances. And relationship, if you ask the question,

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how specifically what they're dedicated to is helping you fulfill what you're

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dedicated to?

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You'll be able to take no matter what they've done and turn into something to be

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grateful for. It's not what they do that makes it,

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if you're waiting for people to support your values,

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that's the amygdala function.

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The amygdala is always wanting a pleasure and avoiding a pain,

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an ease and avoiding difficulties. And that's where you, you don't grow there.

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You grow by having challenges and innovating and creating.

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And so a relationship is not meant for you to be always supported.

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The relationship is there to make you authentic.

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And you're not authentic if you're being juvenilely dependent on that thing,

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that you're infatuated with them. You want the challenges in life.

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And the challenges are one that make you learning how to make sure that you turn

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those challenges into something to be grateful for is the mastery of the

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relationship game. So ask; how specifically is what they're dedicated to,

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what they do every day and what they love doing,

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how's it helping you fulfill your highest values? If you do that,

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you're gonna end up with more resilient, more adaptability,

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and you'll be more appreciative of them,

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and you'll be able to say with integrity, 'I'm thankful to you,

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thank you for what you're doing. I didn't see it,

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but now I see it.' We always think we're victims of history by looking out there

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thinking something's happened to us,

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but it's our perception of what's out there.

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And we can take whatever's out there in our world and find out how it serves

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what's valuable to us. And that increases our gratitude.

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And the same thing socially,

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when we're being really inspired and living by our highest value,

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we're more social leaders and we're more impactful.

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And instead of following a culture, we create a culture.

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We create and lead the pathway.

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And your job is not to sit there and subordinate to the world out there and

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conform and be part of the herd,

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it's going out and getting heard and giving yourself permission to make a

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difference. We all wanna make a difference.

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You're not gonna make a difference fitting in.

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You're gonna make a difference standing out.

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And when you go into take priority actions and take your perceptions and turn

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'em into how it's helping you get what you want, and you're more grateful,

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you're more of a leader and you're more likely to be a leader in society that

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way. And also your physiology. I wrote a book many years ago,

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Count Your Blessings, The Healing Power of Gratitude and Love.

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There's no doubt that gratitude is one of the keys that opens up the gateway of

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the heart and inside the heart is love and love opens up

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and radiates light you might say from our heart and allows us to physiologically

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be more balanced in health, in healing.

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I think that gratitude and love are still the greatest healers of on the planet.

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So we get more vitality and more energy when we're grateful and when we're in

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feeling of love. And from an inspirational level, a spiritual level, you know,

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what more spiritual can be except the grateful heart and a loving heart

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and a grateful mind?

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Those are the two things that represent spirituality as far as I'm concerned.

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If you're not grateful for your life, your life is hell.

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And if you're not in grace, you know, you're in disgrace.

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And I'm a firm believer that all areas of life, all seven areas of life,

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your spiritual path, your intellectual pursuits, your business, your finances,

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your family, your social, your health, all of them are empowered by gratitude.

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Gratitude is the a thing I mean, my mom was,

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told me when I was four years old to count my blessings before I went to bed,

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cuz people who are grateful for what they have they get more to be grateful for.

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And I was born on Thanksgiving day in America.

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My birthday's coming up on Thanksgiving this year.

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And I'm a firm believer that if you take the time to stop and reflect and look

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at what you are grateful for on a daily basis,

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which I have the largest list of gratitudes and opportunistic things,

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I go through and add 'had the opportunity to do this today,

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had the opportunity to meet this individual,

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had the opportunity to film this program,

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had the opportunity to be interviewed by this,

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had the opportunity to write this article.' And I

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on a daily basis.

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And in the process of doing my gratitude then filters out and I get way more

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done. And I have more fulfillment in life and less resistance in life.

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And I don't age as much.

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I really believe that when you're grateful and you have love in your heart,

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you don't age as much.

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So there's a tremendous amount of value in the gratitude attitude.

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And I really believe that that's the key.

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If you sit down and prioritize your life, your actions,

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and prioritize your perceptions and do that on a daily basis,

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you're gonna have more gratitude. The forebrain is the gratitude center.

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And every time you're living by priority, you activate that area.

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And every time you're not,

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and you're letting the world run your life and you become victims of the outer

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world and victims of your history, you won't become master of your destiny.

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So don't allow the, you know, when you get up in the morning,

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if you don't design your day, if you don't fill it the way you want it,

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it's gonna fill up with how you don't.

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And if you don't empower all areas of your life,

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people are gonna overpower you in those areas.

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And they're gonna fill up that day with all kind of trivial stuff.

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And you're gonna say, well,

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I've never got anything that I wanted to get done today.

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And then you feel crap about life. You don't feel inspired by your life.

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Take the time to prioritize your life, prioritize your perceptions,

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your decisions. If you haven't gone on my website to do Dr.

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Demartini's Value Determination process, do that.

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That'll help you determine what really is important to you,

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so you can prioritize according to what's meaningful and not prioritize

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according to what you think it should be according to some outside source.

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You want the inner voice and inner vision to be directing what's priority.

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You wanna be able to do something that's deeply meaningful because when you do

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that, you have a yearning to want to go and be of service to other people.

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When you're empowered, you wanna be of service. When you're disempowered,

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you get focused on your own problems. When you get empowered,

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you want to go out and make a contribution.

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So gratitude is the key that opens up the gateway of the heart allows love to

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come out, radio washes the brain and the mind,

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allows it to be more inspired, more enthused, more centered, more present.

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And those are healing capacities, healing of not just a physiology,

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but the whole body, whole life. So take the time to prioritize your life.

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Take the time to activate your executive center and realize if you do,

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you'll have more time in your life. You'll have more gratitude too,

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and document what you're grateful for on a daily basis.

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It does make a difference.

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I have the largest collection of gratitudes of anybody I've ever met.

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And I do it every single day and I don't miss a day on it.

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And I guarantee you it makes a difference in your life if you take the time to

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actually stop and reflect on the things you're grateful for,

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how is everything is on the way, not in the way?

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I remember a teacher when I was 23 years old, I had a 35 year old guy,

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he had six PhDs, he was a brilliant man, he says,

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'Don't go to bed at night until you can look back at your life and see

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gratitude. If you can't see anything in gratitude,

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there's something that is not grateful for,

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stop and look at it again before you go to bed.',

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Anything you can't say thank you for and gratitude for is baggage.

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Anything you can say thank you for is fuel.

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So let's use both the superficial and the deep form of gratitude,

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and let's go move forward on there and get life on the way, not in the way.

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And if you do that, you'll say thank you even more. So this is Dr. Demartini,

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until our next little presentation, stop, reflect,

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and prioritize your life and say, thank you.

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