Hello men, thank you for joining us for another episode. Today, we start a new series unpacking the book "4 Pillars of a Man’s Heart", by Stu Weber. We’ll explore how these pillars play out in real life, the dangers of imbalance, and, of course, we’ll look to God’s Word as the blueprint. Today, we start with the King Pillar. So, let's dive in and understand what it means to be a servant leader, setting vision, protecting, and providing for those we love.

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Kings are the Biggest Servants

Being a king means we should be the biggest servants in our churches and in our homes. We take our marching orders from the King of Kings. 

Matthew 20:25-28  But Jesus called them together and said, “You know that the rulers in this world lord it over their people, and officials flaunt their authority over those under them. 26 But among you it will be different. Whoever wants to be a leader among you must be your servant, 27 and whoever wants to be first among you must become your slave. 28 For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve others and to give his life as a ransom for many.”

• The best kings are servant leaders.  As men we should be the biggest servants in our households and in the church. 
• When we are serving our wives and giving ourselves up for them as Christ did the Church, like we’re called to do in Ephesians 5, we’ll find we create an environment where it is much easier for our wives to respond to our leadership.  We are called to lead.  That’s part of the King pillar.  
• When the King pillar is in balance, there is peace.  Borders are secure.  Our home is a refuge.  We’re scanning the horizon of the land looking for threats. 
• When this pillar leans too far to the left, there is drift, lack of leadership, lack of clarity, lack of provision.  When this pillar leans too far to the right we become tyrannical.  Those under our care are afraid to communicate fears and concerns.  They feel unvalued. 

A King Sets Vision and A Course 

Kings are called to lead.  We don’t make decisions unilaterally and we don’t make them in a vacuum, but we do need to step up and be decisive. We need to set the course for our families. 

Genesis 3:6 … Then she gave some to her husband, who was with her, and he ate it, too.

• When this pillar leans too far to the left, there is drift, lack of leadership, lack of clarity, lack of provision.  When this pillar leans too far to the right we become tyrannical.  Those under our care are afraid to communicate fears and concerns.  They feel unvalued. 
• Never do we see a clearer example of that than in Genesis chapter 3.  If you grew up in the church, you probably know that Genesis 3 is the fall.  It’s when mankind decided to follow their own thoughts, desires, and opinions over what God had declared to be true.  The serpent twisted God’s Words and when Eve said they weren’t to eat of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil because they would die, The serpent told her, “You surely won’t die. God knows when you eat of it, you will be like God.”  And the woman saw that the tree was beautiful and its fruit looked delicious, and she ate.  That is heart-breaking in and of itself, but as a man, here is the part that hurts even worse. 

A King Protects and Provides

When the King pillar is balanced there is safety and peace.  Our home should be a place of refuge for our families.  We seek to make sure all of their needs are met, not just the material needs. 

• In order for a King’s realm to be safe, it also means he’s aware of potential threats.  He’s on the lookout.  He takes initiative to scan the horizon. Are you aware of the potential threats to your family?   Do you know the friends your children spend most of their time with? Do you know the things that cause your wife the most stress and anxiety and have you thought of ways to encourage her, to help her, and remind her of God’s faithfulness?  Are you aware of threats directly aimed at you - like that female co-worker who frequently tells you that you look nice today.  Are you putting up strategic defenses before that threat gets too close?  
• Meeting Needs
• Physical needs - food, clothing, shelter
• Emotional needs - Are you filling their tank? Are you speaking their love language? Talk about 5 love languages. 
• Relational needs
• Sexual Needs
• Spiritual Needs 

Close

A good king knows what it’s like to be under authority.  We take our marching orders from Jesus Christ and the Bible is our manual. 

• Mutual submission is not an oxymoron
• We submit to Christ’s authority