Artwork for podcast The Grief Code
How The F#ck Did I End Up Here?!
Episode 2539th November 2022 • The Grief Code • Ian Hawkins
00:00:00 00:06:46

Share Episode


Episode Summary

In this episode, Ian discusses the means through which you were able to arrive at a particular point in your life and the circumstances surrounding that point. It could be related to how you're feeling physically or to a choice you made. 

Don’t miss:

  • Understand the context of every choice you make and give yourself time to adjust to the results
  • .How to break your own destructive cycle and find success instead.
  • How to gather yourself and get back on track when you're already in a scenario you don't like.
  • Try to be gentle with yourself; this is something that affects everyone at some point or another. Let yourself some time to readjust to the new circumstances in your life.

Heal your unresolved and unknown grief:

About the Host:

Ian Hawkins is the Founder and Host of The Grief Code. Dealing with grief firsthand with the passing of his father back in 2005 planted the seed in Ian to discover what personal freedom and legacy truly is. This experience was the start of his journey to heal the unresolved and unknown grief that were negatively impacting every area of his life. Leaning into his own intuition led him to leave corporate and follow his purpose of creating connection for himself and others. 

The Grief Code is a divinely guided process that enables every living person to uncover their unresolved and unknown grief and dramatically change their life and the lives of those they love. Thousands of people have now moved from loss to light following this exact process. 

Check Me Out On:

Join The Grief Code Facebook group:




Start your healing journey with my FREE Start Program 

I hope you enjoyed this episode of The Grief Coach podcast, thank you so much for listening. 

Please share it with a friend or family member that you know would benefit from hearing it too. 

If you are truly ready to heal your unresolved or unknown grief, let's chat. Email me at

You can also stay connected with me by joining The Grief Code community at and remember, so that I can help even more people to heal, please subscribe and leave a review on your favourite podcast platform.


Ian Hawkins 0:02

Are you ready, ready to release internal pain to find confidence, clarity and direction for your future, to live a life of meaning, fulfillment and contribution to trust your intuition again, but something's been holding you back, you've come to the right place. Welcome. I'm a Ian Hawkins, the host and founder of The Grief Code podcast. Together, let's heal your unresolved or unknown grief by unlocking your grief code. As you tune into each episode, you will receive insight into your own grief, how to eliminate it, and what to do next. Before we start by one request, if any new insights or awareness land with you during this episode, please send me an email at info at the end Hawkins And let me know what you found. I know the power of this work, I love to hear the impact these conversations have. Okay, let's get into it.

Sometimes in life, you suddenly find yourself in a place where things aren't any way where you'd hoped them to be. And the reality of your situation hits home. And you're just left thinking How the fuck did I get up? Did I get here, the fact that I ended up in this position. Sometimes it can be a place where you've got your health off track. Maybe you've slowly put on weight in some area. Maybe you've you've lost track with your direction of of those good habits. Got yourself in a really bad habits and you have a moment of clarity. And you just go, how do I get here? How on earth did I get here? And it's usually because it doesn't happen overnight. It happens slowly. It happens, you're not going to notice in a way. So it happens in a way that you're not gonna notice on one day, and you're not gonna notice in a week, sometimes you don't even notice in a month. Because things are almost just going through the motions imperceptible to you. Because you're in it. And then maybe you meet up with someone and maybe they point something out that makes you realize, wow, yeah, how did I get to this point? Maybe you see something through a different lens? And then just think, well, yeah, why? Why am I not doing that anymore? Why am I let myself get out of that habit. When I was a new dad, I can remember going to try and run with one of them. And just remember thinking, wow, I'm out of shape. We kids actually have a bit of a laugh at some of those photos of the way that I'm carry. Toby Autoline good fun on math. I'm a big fan of just just things just like let's get not get too caught in who's offended by this at all. That's just like, I'm pretty comfortable with whatever they throw at me. Right? So yeah, they've a bit of a laugh about that. But at the time, I wasn't laughing. At the time, I remember just suddenly getting to a point where man I couldn't let myself get out of shape. There was also a time that was in the six years after my dad passed where I was kind of in a bit of a cycle of going nowhere, wanting two things to be different. But just on the hamster wheel running faster and faster going nowhere and always, always exhausted. As then that you started taking steps. So identifying the pattern that you've got yourself in what's shown up. When did it start? Like so when did that pattern start? Usually you find that some kind of setback event could be big, small, whatever. But that's grief rug. Sometimes it's not the biggest bit of it that you think sometimes it could have been something that happened to someone close to you. Sometimes it can be something that happened, like a conversation that didn't go how you would have liked could be some sort of incident where your injury and then suddenly this pattern begins. Of course, the bigger ones are easier, easier to identify with. And then it's just taking a moment to just pause and go okay, well, I couldn't see that and that's okay. It's why I have a coach as why I have a whole lot of different people that I speak to they can point out those different things to me. It's Well, Kate and I are able to have those conversations ourselves around different things without having that emotional reaction that we would have had in the past because we know the importance of being able But to do that of like, okay, well, this isn't personal. This is just us identifying what's going on and how we want to be bit be better together. So it's okay to ask that question of how the fuck that I get here, because it's a great question to ask to get you back on track and heading into the direction that you want to and getting the results that you want to, but you have to identify, be okay with that. Be kind to yourself, because it happens to everyone, we all have these different patterns. Set yourself a target of what you want. Instead, life's like that. It'll show us contrast. And when you find what you don't like, go search for what you do want. And then you can start on the path. As I've told you about many times in this in this podcast many episodes, mapping out what you want that future look like for you. And then allowing getting you committed to paper and allow your unconscious and the magic in the universe to start finding new answers.

I hope you enjoyed this episode of The Grief Code podcast. Thank you so much for listening. Please share it with a friend or family member that you know would benefit from hearing it too. If you are truly ready to heal your unresolved or unknown grief. Let's chat. Email me at info at Ian Hawkins You can also stay connected with me by joining the Grief Code community at Ian Hawkins forward slash The Grief Code and remember, so that I can help even more people to heal. Please subscribe and leave a review on your favorite podcast platform