In this episode of Cocktails, Coffee, and Conversations™, Tracie delves into the crucial concept for entrepreneurs that one's value is not defined by metrics or numbers. Highlighting the unhealthy reliance on external validation, she explores three key areas essential for sustainable business sales. Through an engaging narrative, Tracie discusses the difference between intrinsic personal value and the mechanical value of business offerings, stressing the importance of internal validation. She encourages somatic practices for emotional grounding and dives deep into ensuring entrepreneurs feel the inherent worth and value of their work, audience, and themselves.

00:00 Welcome to Cocktails, Coffee, and Conversations™

00:54 The True Value of Entrepreneurs Beyond Metrics

01:33 Imagining the Entrepreneurial Journey and Its Challenges

03:18 Understanding Your Value Independent of Business Metrics

04:16 Exploring Personal Value vs. Business Metrics

08:05 Practical Steps to Embrace Your Value and Improve Your Business

09:07 Somatic Practices for Entrepreneurs

11:56 Three Key Areas for Sustainable Sales and Self-Value

17:16 Embracing the Learning Curve and Creating Your Business Model

18:41 Conclusion and Invitation to Share

A tool or two from your host:

Got a question or comment?

www.traciepatterson.com/ama

Want to know more about the training Tracie mentioned?

www.traciepatterson.com/boostoffervalue

Interested to learn about somatic work?

Check out Dr Peter Levine. You can start at his IG account

https://www.instagram.com/somaticexperiencingint/

CREDITS

Music ColourfulSounds

Podcast Editor Maia McLachlan

Digital Marketing VA Lisa Harmatuk

Hello.

2

Hello and welcome to cocktails,

coffee and conversations.

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Tracie here.

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And today we're exploring at crucial

topic for entrepreneurs, understanding

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that your value it's not defined

by your metrics or your numbers.

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Because your value is not wrapped

up in how many people take

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you up on your call to action.

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Hmm.

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How does that feel?

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I will say that there

are three crucial areas.

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You need to be all in on to

sustainably sell in your business.

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And we will dive into those.

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But how many people do or do not

take you up on your call to action?

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Does not define how much you're worth.

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Yeah.

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So let's talk about you.

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And I want you to imagine with me

that you've launched a new offer.

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Invested your time.

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Energy your passion into it.

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Now you're waiting, watching,

refreshing the page.

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Is there new data?

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What does it show?

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How many people are engaging, how

many are signing up to learn more?

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How many are buying.

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We're hoping for the number and

the money flood to just pour in.

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But if it's not what we expected.

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Well, how do you end up feeling.

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Deflated disappointed.

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Embarrassed.

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Questioning, whether it's the right

offer or the right business for you.

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It's easy to fall into the trap

of letting these numbers dictate

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how you feel about yourself.

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And your work.

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To go a little, Eeyore.

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And let our internal fatalists take over.

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And while yes, we should feel all

the feels as they come up, because I

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promise you that 90 seconds of emotional

processing is a lot better than days,

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weeks, or months of repression that

rears its head in unhelpful ways.

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But we have to also acknowledge.

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And take responsibility for the all

too common part of this scenario.

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At tying our value to external

validation and metrics is unhealthy.

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And frankly incorrect.

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This is important because

while metrics can be useful.

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And they definitely have

their place in business.

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Uh, like for checking whether parts of

your funnel and messaging are effective.

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After a promotion is over.

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They should not be the sole

measure of your value or

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even the value of your offer.

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And we're going to delve

into this distinction.

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Okay.

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But first let's address the

common reaction to this idea.

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Because when you heard that your

value isn't tied to the numbers.

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What came up for you?

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Do you think?

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Well, duh.

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And then remember that pit you felt in

your stomach during your last live launch.

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Do you feel relieved?

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Or does it make you anxious?

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Perhaps you argued internally thinking.

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Well, if they found it valuable, then.

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Why wouldn't they just do

what I asked him to do.

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These reactions are natural.

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Especially because we've been conditioned

to equate our importance with our titles.

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Our business success.

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With the numbers.

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And it's constantly reinforced

by what we're given access to.

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Based on these metrics.

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From the capital that we're

seeking to grow our businesses.

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To conferences or masterminds that

we're invited to, or even marketed to.

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But here's the key point.

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The value of you.

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And the value of your

offer are not wrapped up.

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In the numbers.

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Okay, can you wrap your head around that?

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We often use the same word value.

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To define ourselves.

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And the pieces of our business,

but they aren't the same thing.

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And I really want you to

hear this distinction.

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Value and value-able.

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Are not the same.

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Yeah.

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The word we use to describe ourselves.

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Our business as a whole, the impact we

make and can have on our communities.

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Versus the pieces and the mechanics.

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Of our business.

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They're not equal.

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They're not the same.

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This is not the same definition

or use of the word value.

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As much as we traditionally tend

to take on the mantle of our

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importance, aligning with our titles.

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Our identities, our business identity.

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What we have going on or

what we don't have going on.

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It's not the same thing.

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Your passion, your vision.

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What you hope to bring to this world?

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Are fundamentally different from

ensuring that your communication.

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And it's delivery resonate with others.

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Yeah.

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The mechanics of how you communicate,

can be aligned with your intentions, but

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they do not define your intrinsic worth.

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Think about how you feel when you

hit certain numbers or get specific

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responses to a call to action.

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do you feel successful?

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Accomplished validated, excited, prideful.

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Now consider what happens when you see the

metrics are above or below industry norms.

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What if you're not even

sure what those norms are.

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And you're judging your results.

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Based on like a vague idea.

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Or a quote post you saw on Instagram.

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Or worse, a slide from someone's

selling you into their program,

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and now you're judging your

entire business based on that.

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When have you been so excited and happy?

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Only to then feel deflated.

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After someone's reaction.

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Or after getting a new piece of data.

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Is that really the rollercoaster you

want for yourself in your business?

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Because the challenge is to give yourself.

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Those positive or really even neutral.

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Feelings independent of

external circumstances.

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I

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ask yourself.

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What's another healthy way.

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You can recreate that feeling of success.

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Whatever success means for

you without it being tied to

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the things you cannot control.

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Because remember you don't control

tech issues as much as we try.

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Or social media algorithms or

international situations and

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weather, and you know, all the

things that happen in our world.

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But you do control

allowing yourself to feel.

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To process.

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And coming back to how

you define your value.

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And the vision you have for your business.

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And you can determine what your

non-negotiables and negotiables

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are during launching sales

calls, regular business time.

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Any time you feel provoked.

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We can work on the mechanics.

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We can analyze it, control the parts.

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That are available to us.

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But my ask of you is that you

really think about how you

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want to define an internalize.

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Your own value.

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And do the work you need to, to

separate the idea of your inherent

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value from your business numbers.

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Okay.

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Because I can teach you one part.

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But you have to gift yourself the other.

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So, how can you start

to receive this gift?

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Let's talk about some practical ways.

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That you can start to

get out of your own way.

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And then the three things

that you need to be all in on.

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For sustainable sales.

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You have to think of you.

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Outside of your business.

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All right.

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So, what do you have enough of right now?

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Who are you without your business?

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What do you feel about

yourself and your life?

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That's inevitable beyond getting the sale.

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What about the sale that you had before?

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What about the next sale?

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Right.

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We, we have to disconnect this.

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We can still be excited.

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We can still feel pride.

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We can still.

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Feel accomplished about things

without being completely

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attached and connected to it.

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Okay.

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Grounding into these answers, we'll

help you get out of your head.

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So you can get into the heads

of the people that you're

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trying to make connections with.

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Yeah.

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One of the ways that

I do it personally is.

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Through somatic practices.

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And I highly recommend

this, especially for those.

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Who find mindset or affirmations,

not really doing what

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everybody says that they do.

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Right.

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So, you know, if you see this

kind of advice and you're like,

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that sounds great for others, but

that doesn't really work for me.

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I really suggest that you

dig into somatic work.

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Okay.

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Cause somatic work it's

not done in the mind.

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But rather it's the body engaging with

your central nervous system, right?

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Which of course is part of the body.

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To regulate your emotions, your functions.

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And really your whole being.

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Cause Soma the first

part of the word somatic.

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That means body.

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And it's work that

brings it back to itself.

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Brings it back into mechanical alignment.

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Okay.

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It takes it out of all

of that reaction state.

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Into where it needs to be for neutral.

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And what this does is it creates that

safe feeling in a fundamental level.

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And that way, all the other

parts, including mindset.

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They can then fall into place.

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I'll include a resource for you in

the show notes of someone who, they're

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actually a founder in the field.

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So that way you can check it out.

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Right.

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And please do do research, especially

if this is a new concept for you.

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Then really I'm looking to how

this works, but I can tell you

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that it has radically changed.

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How I work and how I function.

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And so much so that I bring

it into my client work now.

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So the people who coach with

me and even digital products.

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And whenever I come in and I

guess coach or I live teach.

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I even start with some somatic practices.

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Central nervous system, calming.

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So once you have that

grounded and that focused in.

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We can look at what to go all in on.

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And

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.

This is the kind of episode and the kind of really teaching that you can hear.

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Someone talk about at one time

and be like, what is happening?

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And then you go through this somatic work

or you go through the regulation work.

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That is right for you.

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And you hear it again.

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And it all clicks.

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Okay.

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So I invite you that if right now you're

like, I feel very discombobulated.

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You know, this all feels very frazzled.

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This isn't the right time

for me to hear this advice.

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Accept that.

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Right.

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And understand that that is you

telling you and giving you the

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advice that you need right now, but

just save the episode and come back

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to it when you're ready for it.

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Because when you hear it again,

it's going to click and you're

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going to be like, oh, I get that.

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All right.

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And that's the same, you know?

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Yes.

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For, for me in this episode, but also

for like the other things that you hear

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and that's how you can learn new things

from things that you've heard before.

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Right.

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It's whenever that, that

you're ready for them again.

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And the first thing that I'm

going to say that you need to

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be all in on it's your offers.

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If you don't feel your work is valuable.

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You're going to struggle.

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Right.

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And I'm not talking about

this on the mechanical level.

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We're we're again, like

we're going inside.

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So what is one thing that you're

human, who is looking to work with you?

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What is it that they're going to

get from doing this offer with you?

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Okay.

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From taking this training from

doing this course from joining your

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program from, you know, saying yes to

letting you do this stuff for them.

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Right.

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It doesn't matter whether you're a

service provider, a course creator,

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a coach, a membership owner, all of

the things that we can be that we can

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have, that we can stake our claim in,

in this digital entrepreneurship world.

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We all have the same, like

fundamental situations.

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Right?

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So what is one thing that your

human can get from working with you?

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Just one.

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It's okay to start with that.

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Because we really need to feel it.

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It doesn't need to be,

they will get 20 lessons.

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No we're talking about.

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That change.

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How is their life going to be different

because they have worked with you.

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Because they've learned with you.

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Okay.

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You need to really feel

it with all your might.

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That people will get this.

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And once you have that one,

you can let it grow from there.

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if you're really struggling or

if you're not sure, That's where

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I would invite you to grab boost

the value of your offer in a day.

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It's that little three hour

mini course that I have.

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But it will let you see all the

goodness in black and white.

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And it has transformed.

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hundreds of businesses.

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But when you struggle with

these Eeyore moments, It can

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be really hard to step into.

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What's great about the work you do.

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Right.

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And you can notice this because you're

going to fall back on those features.

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You're going to fall back on those

physical or those tangible things

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that you're given people three hours.

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Templates.

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PDFs?

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No, that's not the part

we're talking about here.

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Okay.

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At least one result, one

transformation, one change that

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happens one way that their life.

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It's better.

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Is different from where it was, is a

step towards what they want, because

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they've done this work with you.

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Make this list.

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And hold onto it.

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And keep it where you can

call on it, where you need it.

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All right.

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Is as you make one.

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And then you let that kind of sit

and you let it grow from there.

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And then you start to look for

evidence from other people.

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Then that list will, will

it'll start to become a list.

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Right?

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The one thing that you write

down will eventually become many.

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Okay, but don't force

yourself to come up with 20.

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If you're struggling just to come

up with one, come up with one.

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And believe it with

every part of your being.

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All right.

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If you need help.

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Let me know.

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But otherwise, I believe

that you got this.

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You just have to sit in it for

a minute to come up with it.

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Number two is your audience.

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You have to be all in with

them and you have to believe.

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That they want to hear from you.

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They have chosen.

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To follow you.

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They have chosen to read your emails.

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They can always opt out.

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They can always unfollow.

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They can always hit pause.

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They can always unsubscribe.

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Right.

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If you don't believe people

want to be in your orbit.

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And consume what you're

putting out into the world.

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You'll hesitate to make anything.

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Or at best, you'll just entertain them.

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Over truly enhancing their

lives and showing how you

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can make their world better.

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So, what have you seen that

proves they want to be with you?

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And start to make that list as well.

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And the third one.

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Is yourself.

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If you don't believe they won't.

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But not out of judgment.

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Instead, there'll be this kind of niggly

feeling that something isn't right.

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They might not be able

to fully describe it.

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But there'll be this little disconnect.

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That's like, I like her and

I want to be with her, but

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there's just something there.

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And sometimes they can't even

put it into that many words.

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Instead it's in the actions it's in

the following you, but the not buying.

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It's in the watching

everything, but not commenting.

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Right.

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It's in, it's in going half in

on actions, but not all the way.

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And that disconnect happens.

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From them feeling.

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That lack of sense of self on your end.

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Okay.

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So how are you amazing.

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How are you enough as you are?

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Feel into it.

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Let the emotions come out

that want to come out.

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Even if they're like ugly

crying, I don't care.

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Go wherever you feel comfortable to

have those feels and let them process.

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All right.

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If you just try to ignore it, if you

try to suppress it, if you try to move

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past it, if you try to, you know, think

beyond it, all they're going to do is

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they're going to show up in other ways.

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Including self-sabotage.

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Including disconnect.

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So instead feel it.

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Move through it.

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Let it process.

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And then start to ask,

how are you amazing.

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How are you enough as you are?

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Find that evidence.

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And then start to find

that evidence daily.

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Embrace it.

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Make that list.

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And embrace the learning curve.

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That is owning a business that is

existing in this world that we're

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in, that is having something online.

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You know, online business has

been around for over 30 years now.

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But yet it still feels

like the new frontier.

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So it's okay to have a learning curve.

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It's okay.

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To experiment.

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Nothing is a loss.

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Everything is just a lesson.

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So, where do you choosing to learn?

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Where do you choosing to let go of

where do you choosing to celebrate?

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All right.

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Create your business, how

you want and how it feels.

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Good.

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This can take some trial,

but embrace that process.

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Let go of.

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Any past should or quote

unquote ways to be successful.

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You must follow this formula.

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Any of those scripts, any of those,

supposedly go-to selling tactics,

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all those things that for you

personally, they just felt forced

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to include them in your business.

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Okay.

390

Let go of it.

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And instead think about what would

be fun and what would be light.

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Like, if you told a kid what you

wanted to achieve, how would they

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tell you to go about doing it?

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You know, What would be the kind of like

crazy things that they came up with.

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And what will that spark inside of you?

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=We can make new models.

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We can break things

apart and recreate them.

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We can accept parts of some advice.

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And reject or ignore others.

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You can find a way that works for you.

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And still be profitable.

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And I am here for you.

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And I asked that if you found this

episode valuable, please share it.

404

Just share it with someone

who might benefit from it.

405

And don't forget to subscribe

to the podcast for more, because

406

following the show, lets me know

that you're out there listening.

407

And rate it to let me know what

you think, And until next time.

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Be well and have some fun.