146. How School Counselors Can Help With Attendance, Motivation, and Engagement

You're listening to the Counselor Chat Podcast, a show for school counselors looking for easy to implement strategies, how to tips, collaboration, and a little spark of joy.

I'm Carol Miller, your host. I'm a full time school counselor and the face behind counseling essentials. I'm all about creating simplified systems, data driven practices, and using creative approaches to engage students.

If you're looking for a little inspiration to help help you make a big impact on student growth and success, you're.

In the right place.

Because we're better together. Ready to chat. Let's dive in.

Hey counselor friends. Welcome back to another episode of Counselor Chat. I'm your host, Carol Miller, and this is the show where we talk all things school counseling.

And if it's January where you are, because it's January where I am,

I'm guessing attendance is starting to creep onto your radar once again.

There is more absences,

more tardies.

You're probably getting more emails that say this student has already missed X amount of days.

And I think while attendance is always important,

January is often when it really starts to stand out.

So today we're talking all about attendance,

motivation and engagement,

why absences tend to increase this time of year,

how to talk about attendance without blame,

and what counselors can realistically do to support students who are really struggling to show up to school.

But let's start by normalizing something.

Attendance dips in winter months for a lot of reasons, and many of them are really outside a student's control.

Some common January factors include illness and lingering seasonal sickness.

I mean, I don't know about you, but I have seen the same kid with a stuffy nose and snot running out of it for probably three months now and they're just always sick.

But there's also weather related challenges.

Have you ever noticed if there's a two hour delay or a half day of school,

kids tend not to show up.

There could be transportation issues,

maybe there's some changes in family routines.

There could be increased anxiety or depression. I mean, they can't get outside that vitamin D from the sun. They're just not getting it.

They can have some post break disengagement or avoidance.

And for some of our older kids,

they have a lot of caregiving responsibilities at home.

And for some students,

the longer they're out, the harder it feels to come back.

And when absences pile up early in the second half of the year,

it really can feel overwhelming for students and for families.

And I think our role as counselors is so important.

I mean, we have to Shift the mindset Attendance is not just a compliance issue.

Attendance is often a symptom,

not the problem.

And I think that's one of the most important mindset shifts that we can make.

Because when a student is missing school, we have to ask what's getting in the way?

What feels hard or unsafe?

What feels pointless or overwhelming?

Because when our attendance conversations are framed around rules and consequences and threats,

we often lose engagement completely.

But when attendance is framed around support,

problem solving,

connection,

students are more likely to open up.

So we have to talk about attendance without blame.

And our language matters,

especially in January.

So instead of you've missed too many days,

you're going to fall behind or you need to start coming to school.

I mean we've all heard those, haven't we?

You might want to try some language that looks and sounds more like this.

Hey,

I've noticed you've been out a lot lately.

How is school been feeling?

Or what makes it hardest to come to school some mornings?

Or this one?

What's one thing that might make coming to school just a little bit easier?

I mean these Shift the conversation from defensiveness to collaboration.

And remember our students, they don't avoid school because they don't care.

They avoid school because something feels really hard.

And for students with ongoing attendance concern,

we really need layered support.

Some counseling strategies that work well,

of course.

Relationships first.

Students are more likely to attend when they feel known,

when they feel like they're missed and they feel like they're valued.

A simply daily check in or greeting can often make a really big difference.

We also have to identify the barrier.

So use some gentle questions to uncover anxiety.

Academic overwhelm, peer pressures,

family responsibilities or transportations or health concerns because you can't fix what you don't understand and then break the problem down.

Instead of focusing on perfect attendance,

try things like why not try common for just a half day?

Or what's your preferred class? Let's try to get there.

Or I really need you to stay just through lunch or maybe setting a short term goal for the kids that I have that have chronic attendance problems.

These are some of the things that we work on with them.

We've had one little peanut who has she's not really little,

who hasn't been to school for the first half of the year.

She ended up getting a doctor's note to be out,

but that doctor's Note ran out January 1st.

So we are working on things like come in just for a half day,

let's just get to that one class.

Who can we have you sit next to this is your best friend. How about we sit by this person?

And those little conversations really also focus on a collaborative approach to fixing the problem.

What can we do to work together to solve this?

And that can make a really huge difference.

And progress matters more than perfection.

It's also important to teach skills.

Because attendance struggles. They often connect to anxiety, coping skills,

maybe organization,

morning routines,

and self advocacy.

And this is where attendance focused small groups can be incredibly effective.

Helping students build skills,

not just hear reminders.

I have an attendance small group that I use and it really,

it works them through all these things. What are the morning routines that we can put together?

What do we need to do so that if our parents aren't waking us up in the morning,

we can take ownership ourselves?

And what if just before I get on that bus, I start having a panic attack and I don't want to come?

So these are all things that a small group can really work on.

If you need an attendance group,

I can link mine in the show notes for you.

But they really can be incredibly effective.

And here's the truth.

Students,

they're more likely to attend school when they feel engaged,

not just monitored.

So we need to bring some engagement strategies that really support attendance.

And some engagement strategies that we as counselors can support or model include belonging.

We can encourage our kids to join small groups or clubs,

peer connections,

who are their trusted adults.

We can model those.

We can bring those forward to them.

We can invite them to belong.

But also purpose helping students understand why school matters to them.

Little motivational interviewing.

If you haven't tried it,

Reagan north has an excellent interview book on it and he's even been on the podcast before. And there is an episode, I don't know what number it is that he talks about.

Motivational interviewing. I can actually link that in the show notes as well.

But motivational interviewing can help understand or help our kids understand why school really matters, what's going to motivate them to want to come?

And we can connect attendance to their personal goals.

We can even do some career exploration or future focused conversations. Because sometimes the fear of the future is also one of the reasons why our kids don't want to come.

They feel like they're not good at anything,

so why does it matter at all?

So when we can help them find their strengths and their interests and their talents,

and we can lead them into the future,

that can be pretty motivating as well.

We want to give our kids voice,

giving students input,

asking what helps them feel successful,

letting Them help problem solve solutions.

These are all great things that help our students as well as allowing them to have some success experiences.

I mean, celebrate their effort.

All right, you made it here today.

Oh my gosh. You were on time.

Wow,

that was brave. That was incredible.

How do you feel about that?

So celebrate their effort,

notice their improvements and highlight their strengths and not just their deficits.

Because when our students feel successful,

they're more likely to show up.

So let's talk about those small wins,

because attendance progress isn't always dramatic.

I mean, we sometimes have to look at those small wins, we have to track them and we have to celebrate.

And here's what we can do. We can look at improved consistency,

fewer tardies attending on the hard days,

like, oh my gosh, you said it was so hard today,

but you made it here.

Like,

how does that feel?

And checking in with them, instead of avoiding asking for help,

staying longer than usual,

these are other things that we can track.

How many times did they ask for help? Because a lot of our, a lot of times our kids with attendance issues, they don't want to ask for help where they don't know how to ask.

And so then they know that they're getting behind and it's hard for them or if they're always out the door super fast and we notice that they made it for the full day,

that's a win too.

Because how many kids do you have that come to school in the morning,

magically get a stomachache around lunchtime and are asking to go home?

We have quite a few.

So staying longer,

that's a small win too.

And these moments, they don't always show up in those big data spreadsheets,

but improve consistency. Fewer tardies attending on those hard days when they come to check in with you instead of avoiding us when they ask for help, when they stay longer than usual,

all these moments,

they matter.

And counselors,

we're often the only ones who actually notice these things.

So if attendance is something you're actively working on right now,

I do also want to share that I have some attendance lessons that I do with my kids as well,

just to let them know about the importance of attending and what that means and how it can affect their long term success in school.

And I do have the attendance focused small group. I'm going to link to each of those in the show notes.

But all of these things, the lessons, the small group,

all of these things, they're really designed to address the why behind attendance challenges,

to build motivation and coping skills and to support students without the shame or the pressure.

And if you are doing something that you find really, really helpful in terms of attendance,

please share with me.

I'd love to also invite you to be on the podcast and talk about attendance, because I know so many counselors in so many different districts are struggling with attendance themselves.

So we want to hear what is working.

Because all these nuggets that you have of what you're doing in your own schools that work so well for you,

they deserve to be shared.

His sharing is caring, and we all want what's best for our kids.

So if you have some nuggets that you want to share, please, please, please reach out to me.

We gotta get these this word out there.

All right,

my friends, as we move through January,

remember attendance struggles. They don't mean that students don't care.

They just mean that students need support.

Your role in school,

it's not to police attendance.

It's really to remove barriers,

build connection,

and support engagement.

And even small progress is still progress.

So thank you for the work that you do, counselor friends.

I'll see you next time on Counselor Chat.

And until next time,

I hope you have a really great week.

Bye for now.

Thanks for listening to today's episode of Counselor Chat.

All of the links I talked about can be found in the show notes and at counselingessentials.org podcast.

Be sure to hit follow or subscribe on your favorite podcast player. And if you would be so kind.

To leave a review, I'd really appreciate it.

Want to connect? Send me a DM on Facebook or Instagram at Counseling Essentials.

Until next time.

Can't wait till we chat. Bye for now.

Share Episode

Shownotes

You’ll Learn:

Quote from the Episode

Resources Mentioned:

Transcripts

Follow

Links

Chapters

Video

More from YouTube