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Can you, Dear Empath, Be Happy in Relationship With a Narcissist?
Episode 5 • 14th September 2023 • Healing with Human Design • Raven Scott
00:00:00 00:17:29

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Is it Possible or a Pipe Dream?

Navigating Happiness with a Narcissist:

🤔 Can you truly find happiness in a relationship with a narcissist? Let's dive into this complex topic and explore strategies for maintaining your well-being while living alongside a narcissistic partner. 💪💕

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#EmpathicResilience #RelationshipHappiness #ThrivingTogether

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Transcripts

Speaker:

welcome to the Empath Rising podcast, where we are healing

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from narcissistic abuse, with human design, taro, and astrology.

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I'm your host, Raven, Scott.

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Make sure to share this podcast with a friend.

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Spread the love spread the light.

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And subscribe.

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Navigating empathic resilience.

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Can you be happy living with a narcissist?

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This is the question I'm going to try and answer today, and if you're

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stuck and you just can't leave yet, for whatever reason, I'm gonna help

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you with some tools on how to live content, maybe happy with a narcissist.

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Because we all know life with a narcissist can be an emotional roller coaster maybe

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on the daily, especially for empaths who you I know inherently absorb and

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feel the emotions of others deeply.

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While the challenges are undeniable, there are ways for empaths to

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maintain your wellbeing and even find moments of happiness within the

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complexities of such relationships.

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So in this episode, we're going to delve deeper into the three main strategies

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that I personally feel would be the way to go , for you empath to thrive.

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Well be content at least while living with a narcissist.

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These can apply to a relationship that may be toxic or needs work, and you're

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just struggling and in a rough patch.

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So I feel like these apply to everything.

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I've applied these personally to my own life.

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In my current marriage when it was really a rough patch.

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And honestly, , I didn't apply them with my relationship with my

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narcissist because I was just so young, naive, not mindful at all.

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, but I think these will really help you with wherever you're at in your life.

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So number one is don't take it personally.

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Easier said than done.

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Right?

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As.

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My husband now would say, relating to being really stressed out by the

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narcissist is like, don't give a fuck.

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I'm like, how do I not do that?

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How do I, I don't understand.

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I don't know how to not care, but this is the key, key steps of helping

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me move forward and out of my slump.

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So it is one of the most important steps to maintain your emotional

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balance when dealing with a narcissist.

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And it's to remember that their behavior, Is more about them than it is about you.

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And so when you're not taking it personally, therefore you're not receiving

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their deflection because their behavior and their gas lighting, it's all about

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smoke and mirrors and how they feel.

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It's not about you.

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It's more than likely you did nothing wrong.

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But they make you feel that because they're feeling insecure or they're

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triggered or they did something wrong that you're trying to call them out on.

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So that narcissistic tendencies often stem from deep seated

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insecurities and a need for control.

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They might use manipulation.

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I know they will.

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Definitely not a might, but you know, we'll put a might in there just in case

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manipulation, criticism, or gaslighting to maintain their sense of superiority.

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As an empath, it's crucial to detach your emotional body from their words.

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Actions and even body language recognize that their behavior is a reflection,

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their own internal struggles, and it's not a reflection of your worth.

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This doesn't mean that you should accept mistreatment, but misunders, but edit.

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But understanding the root of their actions can help you avoid

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internalizing their negativity.

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Number two is to bounce off their guilt from your energy body, bounce it off.

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There's a cute little child's phrase where it's like, I'm rubber your glue.

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Whatever you say, bounce it off me and sticks onto you.

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That's really what should energetically be happening when a narcissist

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is saying things to you because they are trying to get their toxic

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grossness out stuck onto you.

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But you need to become rubber narcissists are known for their adeptness, adeptness,

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edit adeptness at using guilt as a weapon.

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That is their main way of getting at us.

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Guilt.

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Guilt through silence, guilt through lecturing, guilt through yelling,

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guilt through all their toxic words.

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They might twist situations to make you feel responsible for their

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feelings or actions, but it's not your responsibility for how they feel.

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That's their body.

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That's them.

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That's their head and their brain.

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You're not in there, so it's not your responsibility.

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Dear Empaths.

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Being naturally empathic and compassionate, I know that we can easily

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fall into this trap, but to maintain your emotional wellbeing is vital to

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recognize and counter this tactic.

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Setting healthy boundaries is key.

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Learning to differentiate between genuine guilt and manipulative

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guilt tripping is crucial.

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Practice assertiveness by calmly expressing your feelings and needs without

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letting their guilt tactics sway you.

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I go, it's easier said than done, but if you can practice, practice, practice,

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you will find that you are testing their love for you, that you are testing

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their willingness to grow and change.

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And if they can't grow like you are and change, then they will be soon.

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Or in the near future in a chapter in your life that you're gonna close the book on.

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But remember for now, your feelings are always valid and you have the

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right to stand up for yourself without feeling guilty about it.

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And the last and the third one that's really crucial is to relax

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your fight or flight instincts.

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Living with a narcissist can trigger the fight or flight response.

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So much so that you start to develop these autoimmune diseases, which can

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lead to heightened stress and anxiety.

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Now, I read an really interesting book by Anthony, Dr.

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Anthony Williams.

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Oh, he's not a doctor by Anthony Williams.

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He's a medical medium, and that's what his book's called Medical Medium.

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If you haven't read it, I would highly recommend checking, checking it

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out, reading it, because we all have these things, viruses in our bodies

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that we've picked up as children, which is good to boost our immune

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system, but some are really bad.

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And it's the E B V virus and it actually lays dormant in our

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body, in our nervous system.

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It loves our nervous system.

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It burrows deep into our nervous system, and then it lies dormant.

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So when we get, we get a flare up is when we get stressed,

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fight or flight or triggered.

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And when you're living with a narcissist every single day, you are triggered and

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in fight or flight every single day.

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And so that virus awakens, it becomes alive, it, and it transpires

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into a whole bunch of different illnesses such as, , celiac disease.

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, Lyme disease and

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the other one that affects your nervous system.

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Ms.

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Multiple sclerosis.

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All of these are triggered from stress and toxins in our environment

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and in our food we're eating.

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But also in our bodies.

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So all of us will say these quote unquote mystery illnesses or autoimmune diseases,

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is the fight or flight activating the virus, the E B V virus in your body.

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Just a thought.

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I'm not gonna say it's conclusive, but it's really makes a lot of sense to me.

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And so I, I did the cleanse that was in that book, and so yeah, I would

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highly recommend you explore it.

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I'm now taking the herbal supplements and teas because as you may have

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known or may not last year, I had two skin cancer diagnoses in the same

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year and I'm like, what is going on?

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Right?

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What's happening?

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So, and I have been involved a lot in.

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This kind of stressful process of like interacting with a few narcissists

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in my life, taking it all in and then sharing it with you on the podcast.

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, I feel like I haven't had a lot of that stress fight or flight, but I think the

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stress of, you know, trying to control and make life perfect for my children

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last year might have been a trigger.

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So anyways, I digress with that.

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That that's triggering living with a narcissist.

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This is maybe the why, right?

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You're like, why?

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Why do I have this autoimmune disease all of a sudden

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because I'm with a narcissist?

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That doesn't make any sense.

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That's not scientific.

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Well, I just gave you the science behind it.

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So you don't, you don't like, oh, well the narcissist is causing my illness.

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It's not really exactly that simple.

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So empaths with your heightened sensitivity.

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You might find it challenging to remain calm in the face of a

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narcissist, aggressive behavior or emotional manipulation.

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And I understand.

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That's fine.

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I get it.

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And we explode because we don't wanna keep tolerating and putting up with

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their bss, and then we explode and then they call us out as the abuser

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because we've all hasn't exploded.

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And now we're internalizing the guilt and the frustration and the shame of it all.

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And all of that's also negative, triggering emotions, triggering

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all of these toxins in our body.

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So practicing mindfulness and grounding techniques can

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really help you stay centered.

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Deep breathing, meditation.

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My personal favorite is yoga, because you're kind of doing both.

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You're moving and you're, you're squeezing out all the toxins in your body.

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While breathing and moving the, your body and your mind, it's

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like a moving, moving meditation.

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It's perfect.

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I love it.

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And my Akashic record reading shared with me that that's the best for me

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personally to help heal self-care activities, maybe such as eating

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properly, doing a cleanse, um, watching what you put in your body or on your

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body, taking baths with an Epsom salt.

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Getting outside, walking, doing an activity, getting together with

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groups, maybe a, a book club or a garden club or something of the

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sort to help you fill your cup up.

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It can reduce the impact of your fight or flight instincts, and if you start to

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kind of feel like your fight or fight is welling up or starting to trigger because

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you're in the house with a narcissist.

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Put on some headphones, put on this podcast or some calming music that

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helps you relax and take a walk.

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So instead of reacting impulsively, these, all of these techniques I

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just mentioned allow you to respond thoughtfully and maintaining your

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emotional equilibrium and protecting your overall wellbeing, which is so crucial

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when you're living with a narcissist.

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Thriving as an empath in a relationship with a narcissist.

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I think thriving in is, is an ideal word, however, thriving as an empath,

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doing your thing, letting your light shine still with a narcissist.

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It's undoubtedly a complex journey, and I think a high aspiration.

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I think you can achieve contentment.

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Maybe, and still when you feel contentment, you're gonna feel like

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you're settling, but that's okay.

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When you're ready, the time will come, or that chapter

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will be done of being content.

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However, by implementing these three strategies we just talked about, by

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not taking their behavior personally, asserting your boundaries against

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the guilt trips, and managing your fight or flight responses through

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mindfulness and self-care practices.

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You can create a healthier emotional space for yourself while you plan,

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save money and figure out your next chapter in life to transition out

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away from living with a narcissist.

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I personally don't think that you could ever truly be happy under the fog and

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the darkness of narcissism because it's.

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Beyond the person, right?

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It's deeper, it's bigger, it's heavier, but maybe content just for a time.

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I'm gonna say not your whole life, but remember, your

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empathic nature is your strength.

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You have the power to find happiness and resilience even in the most

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challenging of circumstances.

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Remember that.

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If you are ready to get going on your healing journey and a step-by-step

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process and understanding your human design chart, your energetic blueprint

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to guard against the lies and the conditioning of the narcissist, . The

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Empath Healing Workbook guide is coming very soon, so stay tuned for that.

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Make sure you're.

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Signed up to the newsletter, the Empath Healing Community, to keep updated and

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abreast in your inbox when that workbook is ready to be released and coming out.

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Thank you so much for investing in yourself today to become

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more empowered and listening and tuning into your own inner voice.

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Join our Empath Healing community for free and receive your free 10

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day live narc free audio workshop.

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Grab your copy of the empath and the Narcissist book, either on

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paperback, a hardcover, or audible.

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And look out in your emails for the upcoming workbook coming out soon.

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You can dive deeper with me and get your free human design chart at in the pinned

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post on Instagram at Raven Scott Show.

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Or you can purchase your full reading to ask me as many questions

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as you have about your chart.

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Don't forget to get professional help through our sponsor Better Health.

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and head on over to the episode page where you can subscribe

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to the blog and read even more.

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I have extra bonus information through the blog that you can read that I

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haven't talked about here on the podcast.

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So many ways to dive deeper with me, and I really, really, truly, truly appreciate

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you and I sending so much energy out to you for you to be empowered to your

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empath on your healing journey and in this next chapter of your life, don't

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forget to rate and review this podcast if you have not yet already or just.

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Have then just keep sharing it with the friends and remember, always

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