In this episode of Special Ed Rising, I talk honestly about what families truly need in order to rise.

Before policies, programs, or solutions, we have to acknowledge the lived experience of families navigating special education every day. Families aren’t just managing paperwork—they’re carrying fear, exhaustion, and the pressure to get it right in a system that often asks too much without offering enough support.

I explore the emotional toll on families, the concept of parent role strain, why burnout is not failure, and how broken follow-through erodes trust. Drawing on research and real-world experience, this episode highlights what actually helps families thrive: clear communication, consistent implementation, meaningful partnership, and access to training, coaching, and community.

In this episode:

• Why parental stress and burnout are predictable—not personal failures
• How jargon and broken follow-through block collaboration
• Why parent voice and partnership improve outcomes
• Practical ways schools and systems can support families

Special Ed Rising supports individuals with disabilities across education, access, and health.

⭐ If you enjoy the show, please rate, review, subscribe, and share.

Resources & Advocacy

• Parent coaching & tools: specialedrising.com
• Support Ray’s Respite Care https://www.gofundme.com/f/join-rays-respite-care-mission
• Join the call for a Safer Starter iPhone: iparent101.com
• Featured book: 52 Love Letters to You by Jyoti Jo Manuel — lovefromjyoti.com

When families are informed, respected, and supported, students thrive. When families rise, systems must follow.

REFERENCES (APA)

Cheng, A. W. Y., & Lai, C. Y. Y. (2023). Parental stress in families of children with special educational needs: A systematic review. Frontiers in Psychiatry, 14, Article 1223456. https://doi.org/10.3389/fpsyt.2023.1223456

Mooren, M. A. (2025). How parents experience language during IEP meetings: Perceptions of language and collaboration (Doctoral dissertation, Marquette University).

Pennington, S. E., Tang, J. H., Divoll, K., & Correll, P. (2024). A scoping review of parent interactions with teachers and school environments. Education Sciences, 14(3), 294. https://doi.org/10.3390/educsci14030294

The Impact of parental involvement on the educational development of students with autism spectrum disorder. (2025). Children, 12(1), Article 1062. https://doi.org/10.3390/children12011062

The effect of family–educator relationships on special educator well-being. (2025). Education Sciences, 15(9), 1120. https://doi.org/10.3390/educsci15091120

Episode 154:What Families Need to Rise

Hello, and welcome to SER: No Parent Left Behind! I’m your host, Mark Ingrassia. With 37 years in special education—as a teacher, tutor, , and advocate—I’m passionate about helping families navigate the challenges of raising exceptional children. I’m truly thrilled to have you here!

In this episode, I want to talk honestly about something that doesn’t get enough attention when we discuss special education: what families actually need in order to rise.

Because before we talk about policies, programs, or solutions, we have to acknowledge the lived experience of families navigating this system every single day.

This podcast is a space for inclusion, supporting individuals with disabilities across education, access, and health. If you’re enjoying the show, please rate, review, subscribe, and share—it helps others find us and furthers the mission.

To support the podcast or explore my parent coaching, visit specialedrising.com for resources, tips, and tools. Check out the Special Ed Rising YouTube channel for interviews and more.

I've also opened a GoFundMe to help bring Ray’s Respite Care to life—a service families truly need. You can find the link in the show notes. Every contribution makes a difference. Thank you.

Adam Pletter, clinical psychologist who’s spent over 20 years working with families, knows how urgent it is to get tech right for kids — and Apple needs to hear it from all of us.

Join the call for a Safer Starter iPhone and tell Apple in 60 seconds why this is a public-health moment we can’t ignore. Go to iparent101.com and complete the 60 second form and add your voice!

Discover 52 Love Letters to You by Jyoti Jo Manuel, a beautiful collection of reflections designed to help you embrace self-compassion and presence every day. Each letter offers a gentle reminder to pause, breathe, and reconnect with the love you deserve. Order it before Christmas at lovefromjyoti.com/

Now let’s prepare parents and caregivers to rise! On our way to another win!

—----

Any conversation about solutions has to begin by recognizing what families are actually going through as they move through special education.

And it’s important to name this clearly: families aren’t struggling because they lack effort or care. They’re carrying chronic stress, uncertainty, and responsibility without adequate systemic support. Research shows that when families are informed, respected, and included as true partners, outcomes improve—not just for students, but for schools as well.

Families aren’t just dealing with forms, meetings, and timelines. They’re carrying fear about whether their child will be supported. Hope that maybe this year will be different. Exhaustion from constantly having to explain, document, and defend their child’s needs. And on top of all of that, there’s an unspoken pressure to get it right—because the consequences feel enormous.

And this isn’t just anecdotal. Research consistently shows that parents of children with special educational needs experience significantly higher levels of stress than other parents—especially when support systems are limited and communication is unclear. Studies link this stress directly to isolation, lack of professional guidance, and constant system navigation.

Parents are expected to become experts overnight. Advocates. Case managers. Interpreters of legal language. All without training, without guidance, and often without rest.

In the research, this is often described as role strain or role overload—when individuals are required to take on multiple, high-stakes roles without the time, resources, or authority to carry them out effectively. Studies of families in special education consistently show that parents are asked to function simultaneously as caregivers, legal interpreters, service coordinators, and accountability monitors for their child’s education.

For many families, this begins the moment a concern is raised. A parent hears, “We’re going to evaluate for services,” and suddenly they’re navigating a system filled with acronyms—IEP, FAPE, LRE, due process—terms that are rarely explained but carry significant legal and educational consequences. Research shows that parents often report feeling unprepared and under-informed during this phase, even though meaningful participation is legally required.

At the same time, these parents are expected to understand timelines, consent laws, procedural safeguards, and how to advocate without being labeled “difficult”—all while managing work, family responsibilities, and the emotional needs of a child who may already be struggling. Scholars note that this combination of responsibility and limited support significantly increases parental stress and emotional exhaustion.

So when families feel overwhelmed or burned out, the research is clear: this is not parental failure. It is a predictable outcome of role strain within an under-supported system. Parents are being asked to operate like trained professionals inside a complex legal framework—without the training, coaching, or structural support that professionals themselves rely on.

Burnout, in this context, isn’t a weakness. It’s evidence that the system is demanding more than it is providing.

That emotional toll matters. And we can’t skip over it. Research makes it clear: when parental stress goes unacknowledged, family wellbeing suffers—and that stress eventually impacts children, too.

So if we don’t name what families are carrying, any solution we propose is going to fall flat. We can roll out new programs, policies, or initiatives—but if we ignore the emotional and cognitive load families are already under, those solutions won’t land the way we hope. Research shows that high stress and burnout make it harder for parents to process information, advocate effectively, and engage in collaboration.

Naming that burden isn’t about blame—it’s about creating the conditions for success. When families feel seen and respected, trust grows, defensiveness drops, and real collaboration becomes possible. Solutions don’t work just because they’re well-designed; they work when families have the capacity and support to use them.

So let’s talk about what families actually need—not in theory, but in real life.

First, families need clear, jargon-free communication from schools. Not explanations filled with acronyms and legal language that require a Google search or an advocate to decode. Families deserve to understand what’s being discussed, what’s being offered, and what it means for their child.

Research on IEP meetings shows that parents frequently report confusion and frustration—not because they don’t care, but because the language used often creates barriers to meaningful participation. When communication is clear and strength-based, trust and collaboration improve.

Families also need consistent follow-through on IEPs. No surprises. No shifting expectations. No hearing, months later, that something wasn’t implemented because of staffing or funding issues. An IEP isn’t a suggestion—it’s a legal document thus it’s a commitment.

Studies show that when parents experience broken follow-through, trust erodes fast—and collaboration becomes nearly impossible.

This can look like leaving an IEP meeting with a plan in place, only to find weeks later that supports weren’t delivered, or promised updates never arrive. Each missed step chips away at confidence. Over time, parents may stop asking questions or disengage—not because they don’t care, but because they’ve learned the system doesn’t always follow through. And when trust is gone, even the best plans can fail.

Families need access to training, coaching, and community. Isolation is one of the most damaging parts of this journey. Research shows that social and professional support can significantly reduce parental stress and increase confidence as advocates. So what does that look like in real life? It can mean attending a short workshop to learn how to read an IEP, understand timelines, or ask the right questions—so the jargon suddenly makes sense. It can mean joining a parent support group or online forum where families share strategies, celebrate wins, and remind each other they’re not alone.

Mentorship programs are another powerful tool, pairing experienced parent advocates with families just starting the journey, helping them navigate meetings and paperwork with confidence. Even regular check-ins from schools—emails, calls, or portal updates—can make a big difference, keeping parents in the loop and reducing surprises.

The bottom line: community, guidance, and consistent communication don’t just reduce stress—they give parents the confidence to speak up, ask questions, and participate fully. When families feel supported and informed, students benefit academically, socially, and emotionally.

And above all, families need a respected seat at the table. Not as guests. Not as obstacles. But as equal partners. Their voice shouldn’t be optional—it should be essential.

Decades of educational research confirm that meaningful parental involvement improves student outcomes—academically, behaviorally, and emotionally—especially for students with disabilities.

That brings us to the idea of true partnership.

Real partnership starts with listening. Families know their children in ways that evaluations and data never fully capture. They understand what works at home, what triggers stress, and what their child is capable of when the right supports are in place.

Research on inclusive education consistently finds that when educators and families co-create plans—rather than handing them down—students show stronger engagement, steadier behavior, and improved emotional wellbeing.

Transparency plays a huge role here. Explaining the “why” behind decisions isn’t extra work—it’s foundational. Studies show that trust between families and schools is built through open communication and shared decision-making. Trust can’t exist when families feel shut out or kept in the dark.

Unfortunately, too often, that’s not what families experience.

Special education is still largely reactive. Supports arrive after a crisis—after a suspension, a breakdown, or a child falling behind. Research and parent reports alike show that families are frequently rushed through meetings, dismissed, or told there’s no funding or no flexibility.

Over time, this erodes trust. And when families are positioned as adversaries instead of allies, everyone loses—especially the child. Even educators report higher stress and burnout when relationships with families are strained.

So what can we do differently?

We can start meetings by talking about student strengths—before deficits, before data points, before labels. Strength-based approaches are linked in the research to better collaboration and more accurate goal-setting.

We can offer realistic timelines and clear points of contact so families know who to reach out to and when. Studies show that predictability and transparency reduce conflict and anxiety for both families and educators.

We can invite student voice early and often, in ways that are appropriate for their age and communication style. Decades of work in self-determination and inclusion tell us that when students are meaningfully involved in planning, their confidence grows and their engagement deepens over time.

And we can lead with grace—remembering that schools are overwhelmed and families are exhausted. What we see across the literature is that strong family–school relationships don’t just support students; they also reduce educator burnout and increase professional satisfaction, strengthening the entire system. Evidence from studies on family–educator partnerships makes it clear that compassion and mutual respect improve outcomes not just for students, but for the adults supporting them as well.

This is the heart of Special Ed Rising.

Our mission is to empower families with knowledge so they walk into meetings confident, not intimidated. To amplify real stories of resilience and advocacy. And to push for systems that honor every child’s dignity and potential.

So if you’re listening to this and wondering whether you’re asking for too much, let me be clear.

You’re not alone. You’re not overreacting. And you absolutely have the right to rise.

Thanks for being here. And as always—when families rise, systems must follow.