As a brand protection attorney, Temi is often confronted with examples of people copying others or people being copied. In navigating those challenges, she has developed a particular approach to life that is centered on maintaining uniqueness as one develops. In today’s episode of Fortify and Flourish, Temi lays out what it takes to truly be unique.

⏰ Time Stamps

00:00 Introduction

02:51 Why We Settle for Conformity

03:45 Copying vs. Inspiration

04:35 Sameness is overrated

05:20 It starts with Radical Honesty

07:30 The Revolutionary Act of Being at Peace

08:50 Being Unique in Business

10:00 Resource on Being Unique - Sally Hogshead

Hey, hey, hey, everybody. It's Temi

Siyanbade, your favorite online

attorney and friend at this

point. And I am so glad to

join you today with some additional

thoughts about something that I just

recently came across and some thoughts

that have been going mulling, I've been

mulling over in my mind. Who

has a business and brand attorney?One of

the things that I get to

navigate for people is when folks copy

them, you know?

And it's so unfortunate. So recently I

was online and I saw a YouTube

video and I saw another, and as soon as I

saw it, I was like, I have

legitimately seen this exact same

title with like subtitles and

everything like this thing I've seen

before. So I went back because I could

remember where I was hunting. I was like

and I it it doesn't feel.

Like a coincidence, right?

And it was just kind of like when I, when

I see stuff like that, when I see people

who are outwardly like hopping someone, I

I kind of get it. But it breaks my heart

because I'm like what you're trying to

get, you're not going to get this way.

And So what I want to talk and and this

was essentially the inspiration for

today's video but what I want to talk

about is I want to talk about how to be

unique, right. How

to be unique. How to be different

and. And you know, I start to do

some research in terms of this because I

like to research, I like to study and

read and learn and things like that. And

I found that people are asking this

question. And I remember when I was

younger, there's there was a theme song

that went with Cheerios. I think it was

like the one and all, one and only

Cheerio. And I remember

loving that because I loved the idea of

it being unique, of being the one and

only of its kind. And

I think that. In today's

society, there's this weird

tension between and. It's probably always

been the case, actually. I don't think

it's in today's day and age. I don't

think this is a new development, but I

think there's always been this weird

tension of how can I be like

everyone, and how can I be different, how

can I connect and how can I stand

out? And a desire to do both Because you

want, because we're built for community,

but we're all made different, right?

Even identical twins have different

personalities. And so and

there's this thing where there's a

tension. So I find

that because life is hard,

right?We

tend to lean towards the portion of

being like everyone else, like that ends

up being what we want. We end up wanting

to have the car like the person down the

street, have the marriage like the person

down the street, have the experiences

like the person down the street and the

person down the street seems to have like

this just better life. And we want to

be like them, essentially.

For the most part, if you think about it

that way, like this desire to have what

other folks has is a desire to be like

other people. And and I think it we

end up thinking that other people have

this cheat code and we're just like, OK,

life is so hard. I just want to figure

out how to like get the cheat code. I

just want to figure out how to navigate

the challenges that I'm experiencing. And

so in that pursuit of

guidance, in that pursuit of peace and

that pursuit of a solution,

sometimes people. Lean towards let me

copy someone. And

here's my thought I.

Copying someone is different from

receiving inspiration from someone,

and I would say that in real life, like

practically, but also from a legal

perspective. The

law. Expects

competition. Competition is healthy,

right? In the sense that there's going to

be people and things and products and

services that are in the same space. And

one might be different in this way, and

one might be in this way, but they have a

shared goal, a shared. There can be

sharedness, right? That's

expected because there's

sameness, sharedness in our

experiences. But you've got

to be really careful about crossing the

line from inspiration to actually

copying. All

right. And here's the, you know, I said

here's the thing a second ago, but here's

the other thing. Sameness is so

overrated, like trying to be like

everyone else. I think about the term

People want to be extraordinary, but what

does that mean? It means not being

ordinary. It literally means being

different. Right. And The funny

thing is that when we all lean into the

things that make us different.

We become extraordinary, but we find a

commonality in all of us having

uniqueness. Right. So

what I want to encourage people today is

I want to encourage you to figure out how

you can be unique and and what I want you

to do in terms of looking at that like

practical steps for for how to be unique

is to be honest with yourself. You know

we talked about radical responsibility

before and I have video that's either

coming up or has been posted with regards

to that. But I think it also goes back to

that as being radically honest about who

you are, what your strengths aren't, what

you like, what you dislike. And

embracing it, we have such a resistance

to. How we are

right and and the resistance to how we

are usually is based off of a judgment

that we've placed on it, that this is

good or that this is bad.

We've usually said that, oh, to be

outspoken. Maybe we say that that's good.

And so if we are not outspoken, we now

label ourselves as bad. When being

outspoken is just being outspoken and

this positives and negatives associated

with both like every single trait that

you want to add a judgment to actually

has two sides to that coin. One of them

my friends when I was teaching he told me

he said that your weakness is often also

the the other, the the other side of

the coin to your strength. So the thing

that makes you weak can also be the thing

that makes you strong. And when he said

that I was like this is so profound and

it's so true but if you want to be unique

you have to make peace with that. You

can't put all these judgments about it.

You have to look at it. Objective

standpoint and force yourself to find the

good and the bad in it. By forcing

yourself to find the good and the bad in

the traits that you embody, you now

release yourself to have the peace, to be

that in the world, right? You then say,

you know I can show up in this way

because I know that in and of itself it's

not bad. It's the size that I choose to

exercise in this thing. And yes, because

I'm human, I might sometimes exude or I

might showcase the negative portion of

this, but that's just being human. We're

not perfect. You know, but I

can say that this thing that I've labeled

as negative is actually also has a

positive side And so I can show up in

that that space more like that Just

taking that step of embracing the things

that you often judge about yourself and

finding the benefits benefits for that is

going to allow you to stand out. And when

in in a form or in one way I

would say that excuse me, in

addition to that I would say by

embracing, embracing the that aspect, the

positives and the negatives. You

are doing something that is almost a

revolutionary act in

society because most people don't make

that peace with themselves. So when you

show up and you're at peace with who you

are for real, listen, That's the

uniqueness that in and of itself

is extraordinary. That is something to be

celebrated, like finding peace

in your imperfections, finding peace in

your in in in in your strengths, finding

peace in the in your unique composition,

right. That again, is an act of.

Is it a revolutionary revolutionary act?

And doing that is a step towards

experiencing and being unique.

I had a friend in college who the

way that she showed up was

so authentic and so her

all the time that she consistently

gave all of the people around her

the freedom to be

right to show up in the world as

themselves. And it was beautiful and it

caused her to stand out and be unique in

that regard. So we can do the same thing.

Now those are just a few things that I

would keep in mind when we're talking

about. You know how to be unique. Those

are some of those mindset things that can

shift that for you so you can step out.

And then when you do that in business,

when you also lean into this,

particularly if you're the leader in this

business, right, If you're the owner,

CEO, manager, someone in the leadership

position of that form of a position. And

even when you're not, by stepping in and

leaning into the things that make you

unique and saying, you know I'm going to

own my strengths in this area and even my

weaknesses, you can speak to those places

and show up in those areas of strength

more and and seek out help in those

weakness, areas of weakness. And

seeking out the help again, Foster's

community? Super valuable. But

positioning yourself also in those

positions of strength. Highlight your

uniqueness. Highlight the things that

make you different. Because here's the

thing, you are already unique.

It's not about becoming something that

you already are. It's about allowing the

world to see that. Even this journey of

me kind of sharing these thoughts that

are behind the scenes, right? I've always

been this, but now if you're listening to

the channel, you've listened to the other

things where I'm talking about the LLCS,

I'm talking about the trademarks. You

know that's that's law, that's fact. I

have a unique way of presenting it, can't

hide it because that's the way I'm going

to show up, right. But then you're also

now seeing a little side of me and it's

not like I'm being anything different.

I'm just letting you in, so let people

into the unique side of you. As

we wrap up, I wanted to leave you with a

resource that I found to be really

helpful from a business perspective. And

you know, I love resources. I love books.

You're going to be like she's always got

a book for everything I do because I like

to read. And this book is by a woman

named Sally Hogs Head and she.

Wrote the book. How to

fascinate and her website, I think is I

think our website is How to Fascinate

Calm. And maybe the book is called

Fascinate. That's what it is. And

essentially she's talking about the

unique ways that people perceive you and

learning how to lean into that from a

branding perspective or personal brand

perspective. And really leaning

into the way the world perceives you. Not

necessarily how you see yourself. Because

sometimes that can be a little skewed,

but based off of how you show up the way

the world defines it, the way the world

might categorize it. One of the beautiful

things about that thing and how you can

use that to your benefit in terms of your

personal branding and your business

branding. So check out Sally Hogs

Head How to Fascinate

and her books and her videos on it. I

think that when you kind of go down that

rabbit hole of her resources, you'll find

them to be extremely valuable and eye

opening. If you're struggling with

figuring out how you can show up and be

different. And this is something in

regards to getting your business, is in

regards to your relationship, in regards

to your professional development. If

you're trying to work up the corporate

ladder, listen, I've been in a

corporation or I've been in businesses

and been in spaces where you know, it's

like how are you going to stand out? And

the things that most people would put a

judgement on and label as, oh this is

negative or this is, you know, not

substantial. Listen, I own, I own my

stuff. I'm good at making things look

good. I'm gonna own it, you know,

And that's gonna cause me to stand out.

I'm not gonna despise it. I'm not gonna

minimize it. I'm gonna own it. And so

I I digress. Those are some of the things

that you can do to show up in a more

unique manner. You let me

know as we wrap this video up, this

conversation of let's keep the

conversation going in the comment

section. Tell me what are the things that

make you unique or your business unique

and. What you're going to

do to show that

more and make peace with that more, let

me know in the comments section. This has

been a great conversation. I hope to hear

from you soon. Again, If you want more

resources about mindset and things like

that, please subscribe to the channel. If

you want more information from the legal

side of things, subscribe to the channel.

Listen, Subscribe to the channel.

Subscribe to the channel. Like the

the video, if this has been valuable to

you and enjoy the rest of your day,

I hope to talk to you a very very

soon. Bye.