Episode Title:

Rocks, Sand, and the Pressure to Do It All (Especially in April)

Episode Summary:

April can feel like a breaking point for school counselors. Between testing, behavior challenges, end-of-year responsibilities, and ongoing student needs, it’s easy to feel like you’re falling behind.

In this episode, I'm sharing a powerful perspective shift using the classic “jar of rocks” story to help you refocus your time, energy, and expectations. This is your reminder that you were never meant to do it all—and that doing less of what doesn’t matter can actually help you do more of what does.

In This Episode, You’ll Learn:

• Why April feels especially overwhelming for school counselors
• The hidden “invisible checklist” many counselors carry
• How to identify your “rocks” (what matters most right now)
• The difference between rocks, pebbles, and sand in your daily work
• Why letting go is a strategic decision, not a failure
• A simple mindset shift to reduce overwhelm immediately

Key Takeaway:

“You were never meant to do it all.”

Reflection Questions:

• What are your rocks right now?
• Where are you spending time on sand instead of what matters most?
• What is one thing you can let go of this week?
• Where are you already making a difference (even if it doesn’t feel like it)?

You don’t have to do everything to make a difference.

You just have to focus on what matters most.

And right now… that’s enough. 💛

Grab the Show Notes: Counselingessentials.org/podcast

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Connect with Carol:

• TpT Store
• Counseling Essentials Website
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• Facebook
• Elementary School Counselor Exchange Facebook Group
• Caught In The Middle School Counselors Facebook Group
• High School Counselor Connection Facebook Group

Mentioned in this episode:

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You're listening to the Counselor Chat podcast, a show for school counselors looking for easy to implement strategies, how to tips, collaboration, and a little spark of joy.

I'm Carol Miller, your host. I'm a full time school counselor and the face behind counseling essentials. I'm all about creating simplified systems, data driven practices, and using creative approaches to engage students.

If you're looking for a little inspiration to help help you make a big impact on student growth and success, you're

in the right place.

Because we're better together. Ready to chat. Let's dive in.

Hey everyone,

welcome back to Counselor Chat.

Let me ask you something.

Have you ever looked at your calendar in April and thought,

how is all of this supposed to fit into one human life?

Because if that's you right now,

I'll tell you.

You are not alone,

April.

Well, let's just face it, the end of the school year has a way of just piling it all on.

I mean, you've got testing season,

there's behavior spikes,

there's end of year lessons that you still want to get to,

some small groups that you're wrapping up,

data collection, scheduling meetings,

and oh yeah, there's actually supporting kids through some really big feelings.

I mean, it's a lot.

And somewhere in the middle of all that, there's this quiet pressure whispering,

you should be doing more.

I see this all the time with school counselors.

Every time I log into Facebook, I mean, there's another post of I feel like I haven't done everything that I'm supposed to this year.

Or I feel like I'm such a failure because I haven't done X, Y or Z or my to do list just keeps growing longer and longer and longer.

And I do think that we carry this invisible checklist around with us.

The ones that say, did I cover every sel topic? Did I meet with every student who needs support?

Did I run enough groups or collect enough data?

Just simply, did I help enough?

And I think when we can't check every box,

we feel like we're falling short.

But here's the truth that I really want you to hear today.

You were never meant to do it all.

Now, if you've been listening to the podcast for a while, you know that I love,

love, love, love a good story.

And so this whole time of year,

it just reminds me of a pretty simple story. I'm sure you probably have already heard a version of this before,

but I think it hits differently this time of year,

so I'm going to share it here with you.

And it's the one of the jar of rocks.

So a teacher stands in front of of their clasps with a large empty jar.

And she has a pile of rocks, a pile of sand and some pebbles, and like all this water.

And she starts by filling the jar with all the sand.

And guess what? The jar,

it's pretty full.

And so as she tries to add the pebbles and the stones and everything to it,

everything is overflowing. And she says to the class, like, did this work?

And the kids are all like,

no.

So then she tries another one and she fills it once again with all the big rocks.

And she asks class,

is this jar full?

And the class says, yes.

But then the teacher poured in the pebbles, and the pebbles, they filled in the spaces between the rocks.

And she asked, now is it full again?

The class said, yes.

And then came the sand filling even smaller spaces.

I mean, the jar now was truly full.

And that's when the teacher looks at the kids and says, you know,

the rocks are the most important things in your life.

If you fill your jar with the sand first,

you won't have room for the rocks.

And if we bring that thought,

the rocks are the most important things in your life.

Let's bring that into our counseling world.

Because April,

the end of the year,

it's full of sand.

Tiny tasks,

extra requests, last minute add ons, emails, paperwork, the can you just moments that teachers are asking you for in the hallways.

And if we're not careful, we spend all our time pouring sand into our jars.

So here's the question I want you to sit with.

What are your rocks right now?

Not in theory,

not in your ideal program,

but right now.

And maybe your rocks are just supporting a handful of students in crisis.

Maybe it's helping a class that's struggling with behavior regulation.

Maybe it's finishing a small group that's finally clicking.

Maybe it's being a calm, steady presence during testing season.

Those,

those are your rocks.

And everything else, it's pebbles or sand.

And here's the hard truth. If you try to do it all,

you risk missing the things that matter the most.

Now let's talk about the part that's the hardest and that's the letting go.

Because we can say, focus on the rocks,

but what does that actually look like?

I mean, it might sound like I'm not going to create a brand new lesson right now.

I'm going to reuse something that works.

Or this group doesn't need to be perfect,

it just needs to be helpful or even I can't Take on one more thing this week.

And here's the key.

Letting go is not failing.

Letting go is focusing.

And this reminds me of a time, and I'm sure you've had one like this, too,

where everything,

everything felt urgent.

I mean, there are behavior concerns. There were teacher requests, students that need support,

deadlines. Oh, the deadlines just looming all over.

And I can remember thinking, if only I could just catch up.

But the truth,

the truth was that there was no catching up this time of year.

There's only choosing.

Choosing where your time goes, choosing where your energy goes, and choosing what matters most.

So instead of asking,

how do I get everything done?

I think you need to try asking what matters most right now.

And instead of asking,

what am I behind on?

Ask yourself,

where am I making a difference?

Because I promise you,

even if your to do list says otherwise,

you are making a difference.

Because, my friends, sometimes the best thing that you can do this time of year is not to do more.

It's make what you're already doing easier.

So as you head into this week, I want you to picture that jar and I want you to ask yourself,

am I filling my time with rocks or with sand?

And if you need permission to let something go,

this is it.

I mean, you don't have to do it all to make a difference.

You just have to focus on what matters most.

My friends, if you need help with some lesson plans or behavior forms or any of those things,

you know, I always have you covered.

You can go and join Perks,

you can go to TPT and log in there,

but we definitely, we have you covered so that you don't have to create different things.

You've already spent the time and energy doing it for you.

So right now,

this time of year,

really just focus on what you can do.

And until next time,

remember,

you are making a world of difference to a kid right now.

You are their safe place.

You are the reason that they come to school.

And so, until next time, I hope you have a really great week.

Bye for now.

Thanks for listening to today's episode of Counselor Chat. All of the links I talked about can be found in the show notes and at counselingessentials.org podcast. Be sure to hit follow or subscribe on your favorite podcast player.

And if you would be so kind to leave a review, I'd really appreciate it.

Want to connect? Send me a DM on Facebook or Instagram at counselingessentials. Until next time. Can't wait till we chat.

Bye for now.