What is the Emotional Freedom Technique? How can you integrate EFT into your practice?
MEET Dreya Blume
Dreya Blume is a social worker, therapist, and tarot card reader. She is also a huge fan of incorporating holistic strategies into her healing practice, from Reiki to singing bowls, and EFT to tarot cards.
Dreya is the author of several books, including "The Tarot Activity Book: A collection of creative and therapeutic ideas for the cards," and "Tarot for Transformation: Using the major arcana to discover your best self and have a life worth living" (both under her former name, Andy Matzner).
Dreya is a transwoman who worked as a gender therapist for many years, serving the transgender community of southwest Virginia. She recently moved to Durham, NC, and is excited to begin a new chapter in her life!
Find out more about Dreya at Dreya Blume
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Find out more about Dreya at Dreya Blume
Chris McDonald: Are you ready to learn a simple yet effective strategy that can help you and your clients self-regulate? In today's episode, we move deeper into EF f t, or known as emotional freedom technique. You'll get to learn a tapping technique that you can apply right away. Let's dive in. This is Holistic Counseling, the podcast for mental health therapists who want to deepen their knowledge of holistic modalities and build their practice with confidence.
I'm your host, Chris McDonald, licensed therapist. I am so glad you're here for the journey.
Welcome to today's episode of the Holistic Counseling Podcast. There are many holistic modalities. And sometimes it can be difficult to find one that you can really connect with that gives you the positive outcome you're looking for. Hi, am welcoming back today, Drea Bloom, who is in episode 87, simple Techniques for using tarot cards in sessions.
She's here to talk about the benefits of EF f t, and you'll be giving the opportunity to learn a tapping technique. A fun fact about Drea is she has lived in Japan, Thailand, Australia, and Hawaii for extended periods of time. Welcome back to the podcast.
Dreya Blume: Oh, Chris, thank you so much for having me on Again, I'm really grateful to be here.
Chris McDonald: Can you tell my listeners more about yourself
Dreya Blume: and your work? Yeah, sure thing. So I've been a therapist for about 20 years and in my prior life, yes, I was an English teacher and I was very lucky to spend lots of time in places like Thailand, you know, Japan, Australia. And how exciting. Oh my gosh.
It was, you know, traveling really opens you up to all sorts of things, and I feel very blessed that I, I had that part of my. But, uh, my ex-wife got a job in Roanoke, Virginia, in southwest , Southwest deep southwest Virginia. And that's what brought me kind of down to earth in terms of really settling into a new kind of life.
And yeah, I became a, a clinical social worker, just loving therapy and I teaching as an adjunct. So teaching psychology and social work at a local community college for many years. And, uh, I mean, I've recently moved here to Durham. In North Carolina and I've, I don't know, I feel like I'm. Patchwork because I was always jealous of my ex-wife having summers off as a professor.
And I thought, you know, how do I create a social work career where I have some flexibility with my schedule? So I just pieced together a whole bunch of, kind of part-time, these sorts of things. So my therapist practice was part-time and teaching was part-time. And I worked in psych hospitals part-time and did some management work part-time as well.
I, um, kind of ran the, the gamut of, of. Things you can do as a social worker and as a therapist, but I, I certainly learned a lot and, and one of those things was emotional freedom technique. EF f t I know people sometimes get confused when they hear EF f t cuz they think emotionally focused therapy. Right?
The marriage thing. I'm like, no, it's too bad to say. Yeah,
Chris McDonald: I've gotten that confused too. , I'm must admit because I was like, is that e F T tapping together?
Dreya Blume: I know, right? Like what's going on there? Yeah. But E F T I, um, and I know, we'll, we'll talk more about that, but I just have to say that actually I, I started learning tarot pretty much.
Gosh. I've known EF f t even before that. I think it's been Wow. Yeah, like. Right. When I moved to Roanoke, I met a woman. I know we're jumping in, but I just have to say it. I, I've always been really into anything holistic and Yes. One of the first people we met, she's like, I think you would like this. I said, what?
She said, well, you know, I, I've been going through, um, She had breast cancer and, and Lyme disease, but she was very holistic and she was working with a, a doctor based out of Germany. And, you know, the Germans are very progressive when it comes to holistic health. And she said, there's this cool acupressure technique I think you'd love, and here it is.
And as soon as she showed it to me, I was like, whoa, this is really awesome. And I, I fell in love with it and I did a deep. . And you know, here I am again, probably a little over 20 years later and it, it really is something I'm, you know, I'm passionate about tarot certainly, but I'm, I'm absolutely equally as passionate about this tapping thing.
Chris McDonald: thing. . Yes. Yes. And I can tell you're passionate cuz I know we've had conversations and. And I know I've asked some things like in Facebook groups and you're like, try e f t , tap on anything. Yes, tap on anything. So let's rewind a bit. So let's go to the beginning. So what is EF f t and how long has it been
Dreya Blume: around?
Sure, great question. So emotional freedom technique is what we would call a psychos sensory modality. So it, it's combining. Tapping on acupressure points. So these are actual acupuncture points that we're tapping on, but there's also a psychological component in terms of affirmations, phrases, uh, it's exposure.ina opening up in the, in the:
The psychological aspects of acupuncture of Chinese medicine and what, what are the relationships between psychological states, such as anxiety and depression and trauma? What? What's the relationship between psychology and then the energy meridians that run through our body? Chinese medicine is based on energy and then also connections with muscles as well.
How are muscles impacted by energetic work as well as by the emotion? . And so through the seventies and into the eighties, you had different psychologists combining Chinese medicine theory with Western psychology. Uh, but it, it wasn't until, and, and this is the problem with E F T, this is why we're all doing E M D R, not all of us, right?
But, you know, why, why, why did E M D R kind of become such, such a, an important part of kind of the toolbox when it comes to trauma and emotional freedom? Didn't, when I can tell you having been trained in e emdr that they're very, in terms of the secret sauce, why does e EMDR work? It's very similar to why E F T works.
The thing that happened though, unlike Francine Shapiro, uh, the gentleman who created the protocol of emotional freedom technique, a, a guy named Gary Craig. Who was studying under a psychologist, this guy was really into holistic health and psychology. And so even though he wasn't practicing as a counselor, he was studying with one this guy's technique., I wanna say: that time, I wanna say maybe:
If you think about EMDR and, and you know, wanting to facilitate sci like tests, basically, uh, scientific studies, you know, to, to support the use of something like em. Let's say, even though again, we're not really sure, why does e MDR work? Um, you know, what is going on when we're moving bilateral simulation because Gary Craig released it into the world.
You had a lot of coaches, life coaches, health coaches who were using it. It just became a wild west. And so, Even though it's very, very effective, I think it hurt the legitimate, and I hate to say this, but it, it hurt the legitimacy that he gave it away for free because then anybody could just say, Hey, I'm, I'm an E F T coach, or I do E F T, and they didn't have like, that's why e EMDR is beautiful, because e MDR has this incredible protocol.
That you learn for client safety, you know, in terms of working with trauma and typical E F T training didn't have any of that. It was just, Hey, in five minutes I can teach you how to do this. And so for a long time it was considered, and I, I know you asked me before we went on the air about E F T being a pseudoscience.
Chris McDonald: Yeah, that was interesting. So before we hit record, I, I wanted to let Andrea know that I was just researching a little bit online and, and this, and I came across a lot of articles about saying, um, this is pseudoscience. This isn't real, and this is all, um, what was it? Placebo effect.
Dreya Blume: Yeah. It's fascinating.
People say the same things about Acupunc. Yes. You knows when, when you start to look at, you know, the skeptics, people who are, you know, for sure we're only gonna use things that are quote, right. Yeah. Evidence-based quote, scientific quote, scientific. There's so many issues. We could probably have a whole, that could be, that's a whole other episode,
Yeah. The problem with evidence-based quote, and if anyone listening is, is a fan of evidence-based. Apologize. I don't, I don't mean to offend, but you know, there's a whole body of research that really dismantles the notion of an anything psychological in terms of a modality being evidence-based. That's just not how things work.
And even C B T trials, you know, the majority of them you've got. Efficacy of, you know, 30%. And so saying that kind of behavioral therapy is a gold standard and we should use it with everyone. Well, it's working for three outta seven people and so it's evidence-based for 30%. What about the other 70%?
Right. It's not certainly effective for them. Exactly. Yeah, so the thing about EFT is it looks weird, you know, you're tapping on these points and, we'll, I can talk more about, again, exactly what we do, but you know, you're tapping on these points and you're saying these things and so yeah, it looks a bit strange and it's, it's easy to say, well, that just, that's a whole bunch of bologna.
But what's interesting is, It actually does work. And so because it does work, certainly in recent years, there actually have been, again, even though I'm a critic of, you know, scientific studies, because it's so impossible to really carry them out appropriately with anything psychologically based, just because that's not how humans work.
You can't control for so many aspects that impact whether a psychological technique's gonna work or not. But you know, we are finding though, according to the scientific. You know, studies that yes, EF t is just as effective for, you know, the same percentages of people that C B T, uh, is effective for when it comes to anxiety and depression.
So, so emotional freedom technique is considered to be an evidence-based practice today, but for a long time it wasn't. because it was kind of weird. And you know, it's, it's why does pressure work? Why does acupuncture work? Because you're impacting the energy system of the body. And people get all uptight about that.
But I can certainly tell you as someone who's used E f T themselves, uh, you know, it, it certainly has helped me and it's helped members of my family and helped many. Clients. And so when people say, oh, it's, it's just pseudoscience, it makes me sad, or that's a placebo effect because J you know, just because we don't understand something doesn't mean it's not legitimate.
Or j just because we don't have evidence for it, working on a scientific level, you know, it's something that we can explain scientifically. Doesn't mean that it's, it's actually not a thing. Right, exactly. Oh, I hate, yeah. These pseudoscience people, they, they just, they like being a sourpuss and raining on people's parades.
Chris McDonald: And there's a lot of that out there, especially people that are more on the scientific mind, I guess. More analytical and, and you're right, it, it could look weird if somebody's tapping Yes. And saying these things out loud. Yeah. And for somebody that, I'm just trying to think of somebody like in my family who would be like, oh my gosh, what is that?
Why are you doing that? It's a bunch of
Dreya Blume: crap. Yeah, but you know, thing, things like exposure therapy, which is certainly, you know, when I think about prolonged exposure therapy, which is a gold standard for trauma, like in the, in the veterans hospital system, you know that that's just as likely to traumatize someone as to help them.
Right. You know, so, so when people talk to me about, well, I'm only gonna use things that are scientifically supported, you know, like C B T or like exposure therapy, I'm like, you know, again, what, what does that, what does that really mean? If it's, even if it's a 50% efficacy rate, that means half the people you see it is not going to work.
And, and it could even traumatize them. And so, you know, being wedded to, well, something has to be proven again, we, we could, you know, I could go on forever just Yeah. In terms of, A lot of what people believe to be, you know, evidence based actually, um, when you read the studies, um, and when you read the critiques of, you know, how do you even create scientific studies measuring psychological outcomes, it's really very complicated.
You know, it's not as simple as, oh yeah, cbts are a gold standard because it works and so you should use it with everybody. It's just way more complex.
Chris McDonald: So I know you mentioned some of the personal benefits and some with the clients. Can you share more details about what are the benefit?
Dreya Blume: Oh my God. And so this'll help people understand if you're not familiar with EF F t, a bit of in terms of what it entails, because this is why I love it.
So the thing that's been most helpful for me personally and professionally when it comes to emotional freedom technique is the affirmation. Because basically the way that it's really split into two parts. The first part you're tapping on on the side of your palm, if you would imagine karate chopping a piece of wood, and so your palm is.
There's is sideways and it's so your thumb is up again, just imagine doing a karate chop and right under your pinky, if you look at your palm, there should be a line. If you were gonna read your palm, there should be a line that runs across your palm, right to your pinky. And so under your pinky, it's the side of your palm, the side of your hand, in the bottom.
If you were gonna karate, chop something, There's a point there. So we tap on that point and we're focusing on what is bothering us. And again, I think E F T was ahead of its time because this whole idea of, again, this goes with with E M D R, focusing on what the distress is, creating a sense of hyper arousal.
and at the same time creating a sense of hypo arousal, relaxation. And so we're doing that with the ft. So Chris, for example, if you were feeling stressed or anxious, I would say please focus on what is stressing you out. And at the same time, tapping on that point at the bottom of your, on the side of your palm.
But the cool thing is there's gonna be an affirmation and that affirmation. even though, and whatever the problem is. So even though I'm feeling really stressed right now, I love and accept myself. Now, for me it's really important because think how often. We tell ourselves that we love and accept ourselves, , it's not, not very often.
Not very often. Yeah. Yeah. And so I think that often we are stewing in what's bothering us, which is natural, right? I'm upset, you know, I'm angry. I'm angry at another person, I'm angry at myself, or I'm sad, or judging ourselves. Judging, oh my gosh. All these things. And so we're marinating in this negativity.
Again, it's, you know, it's what we're feeling. It's what's coming up for us. So it's legitimate, but certain things are not legitimate in terms of if we're , you know, and that's where I like C B T. If I'm telling myself I'm a loser, it's like, ah, am I really right? So maybe that is a, a message that needs to be addressed, but, The thing is, if in the moment I'm feeling a certain way when we do E f T, we're staying in that moment.
Right? I'm not asking you to feel differently. I'm asking you just feel what you're feeling, but same time you're tapping on this point and you're also telling yourself right at the same time that I'm just feeling awful right now. I accept myself, I love myself. And to me that message, because we don't often get it, is very, very important, right?
It's letting our subconscious and consciousness know, Hey, you're okay right where you are in this moment. It's okay that you're feeling what you're feeling. And the cool thing is I do have plenty of clients who have very low self-esteem and they cannot tell themselves that they love and accept themselves, which is fine.
In that case, we simply switch the affirmation to That's okay. So even though I'm really upset with myself right now, That's okay. So we're validating what we're feeling, which again, I think is really, really important because if we're distressed, we don't wanna feel that way, right? It's like, Ooh, I, you know, like, I hate that I'm feeling this way.
I don't wanna feel this way. This affirmation gives us the opportunity to really honor where we are, gives us something to do with what is coming up. Because the third option, and again, this is just the first half of EF f t, but so we're tapping on that point. On the side of our palm, but you could also just do a choice, like how would I like to feel?
So even though I'm feeling really stressed right now, I choose to remember that I'm gonna land on my feet, for example. So something affirming. Yeah, I like that. Yeah, so that's the first part. So I don't know if you have any questions or thoughts, but for me that the verbal part of this, I think especially for clients who have a hard time saying they love and accept themselves, you can say, and while tapping, even though I, I don't like myself, or even though I'm having a hard time telling myself I love and accept myself, you know, that it, it's okay that I'm feeling this way or maybe I, I choose to believe that I can.
To love and accept myself, even though I don't right now. I hope that maybe in the future I can, like you can, you can play with that
Chris McDonald: language. So it's really meeting them where they're at. Yes,
Dreya Blume: exactly. Exactly. So that to me is a big. Piece of it. And then the second half, again, you're continuing to focus on what's bothering you and how it just isn't as a word or a phrase.
So, uh, you know, I'm gonna just focus on, let's say, feeling stressed or, or angry at, at, at my friend for what they did, or, or pissed off because that driver cut me off. So, you know, feeling pissed. And then we tap on a series of points. Starting at the top of the head, moving to our eyebrows, and then our temples under the eyes, under the nose, under the bottom lip, and then two points on your chest.
Right under your clavicle, you're focusing on what's bothering you. While engaging in bilateral stimulation, right, while basically stimulating these acupuncture points. So getting energy moving. Uh, but even if you don't believe in Chinese medicine, we're still engaged in bilateral stimulation, which means we're sending signals to the body that we are safe.
And, and like I said before,
Chris McDonald: and that's used in EMDR too. The violin. That's the thing. That's the secret sauce. That's funny. . Yeah.
Dreya Blume: Yeah. And I don't know about brain spotting, but what I think is interesting is that E F T and E MDR kind of have this very similar motor, right? H how do we get relief? Well, we focus on, again, creating this state of, of hyper arousal, right?
We're gonna focus on what's bothering us. , but at the same time in emdr, bilateral stimulation create hypo arousal. E f t does the same thing. And I think what we've discovered that's beautiful about the human organism is that when you have those two states at the same time, the state of hypo arousal basically overlays.
It, like pulls the rug out from the distress state, and, and it's, it's paradoxical because, oh, why do I wanna focus on what's bothering me? Well, because that's how you actually get rid. As long as you're creating a state of hypo arousal at the same time, and that's what EF F t does. Yes, it sounds powerful.
It is it, and I'll tell you why. What I think is really powerful, you're free associating and when you free associate. All sorts of things come up that ordinarily wouldn't, and I'll tell, and I know, I feel like, I know I've been going on and on, but I feel like, oh my gosh, e s t is so cool. And I, I wish everyone knew about it.
But, um, like if, if you said to me, you know, Drea, I'm really stressed right now. And I would say, okay, let's start tapping. What are you stressed about? And then I would say, as you're doing this, tapping, if other emotions are coming up as you're tapping, just switch. Your language to those things. So you might start with, you know, even though I'm stressed right now, that's okay.
And you know, actually I'm kind of, I'm afraid. I'm afraid I'm, I'm, I'm gonna be overwhelmed. And this is making me, it's making me anxious, but it's also making me sad cause I don't wanna feel this way. And so while you're just speaking out loud, what's coming up and tapping all of this information that ordinarily you.
You wouldn't be connected to is coming up because you're giving it the opportunity to. And that's, so you're getting to really core emotions, the things that are driving, let's say the stress or anxiety or depression. And so, um, that to me is worth its weight in gold.
Chris McDonald: Yeah. So j it sounds like it's flexible too.
So if other emotions come up, you can work on that.
Dreya Blume: Yes, yes. So the beautiful thing about it is that you are, are truly following intuitively, right? What is asking for your attention and, uh, and what I like about, again, I'm trained in emdr, but you know, my client, if they can't do EMDR at home alone, I mean, they could do a butterfly hug or, you know, we're gonna teach them things that they can do at home.
But, uh, typically you're doing e MDR in session. E F T is something I can teach a client very quickly. Um, it's, you know, it's, it's simple. It's very profound but simple. And so if they wake up at three in the morning and they can't go back to sleep and they're just stewing, they can actually do something about it, right?
They, they can literally just start tapping, uh, even though I, I can't get my, my mind to stop racing and I, I, I hate that. I cannot go back to sleep. That's okay. Yeah, I love and accept myself and then well, what's on my mind? And you know, I would tell them, if, if you wake up, just go there. What, what is making you, uh, what is preventing you from falling back asleep, just in your head or out loud?
You know, describe it as you're tapping. That way you don't have to feel powerless, right? There's actually something that you can do. Yes. Wow. Feeling distressed
Chris McDonald: empowerment, isn't it? And that's the same with brain spotting, cuz there's practices you can do at home too. I just, I just love that so much that it's not just limited to sessions.
Dreya Blume: Uh, isn't that cool? And I wonder in brain spotting, like, like if you're worried you're gonna have a panic attack and then that kind of creates this suspicious cycle, right? Worrying about Yeah. Panic acting facilitates it. Right. Yeah. Are there things in
Chris McDonald: brain spotting you can do? Oh yeah. You can learn what's called self spotting.
We use what's called a resource spot with your visual field. And again, that's a whole other . We have another episode on that in the Holistic Counseling podcast. But, um, but also using, um, brain spotting music. We call it bilateral stimulation. So that's music goes from one ear to the other. And it's on Spotify by David Grand.
So, and I tell clients they can just listen to that without having a, a brain spot. We call those, any of those a resource spot. They can just listen to it and it helps your brain process.
Dreya Blume: That is so cool.
Chris McDonald: I love it. Yes, that's why I love it so much too.
Dreya Blume: Ah, it's empowering.
Chris McDonald: It's empowering. Yeah. No, I think that's really helpful that this could be used anywhere and it sounds like for any kinds of issues.
Dreya Blume: Well, I'll tell you it, and that's the thing, you know, for, I'll give you an example, and it's an example I use often, but it, to me it was very profound. I mean, my, um, I remember when my, my daughter, she was young, maybe six or seven years old, and we were at a hotel and we were swimming and she swallowed some water and, you know, she was really scared and.
She got outta the pool, but she was really upset and you know, normally. We might say, well, you're okay now. You're okay. Everything's fine. But she wasn't fine, you know, she was still upset, she was still scared, she was still anxious. And what I loved was I had the ability in that moment to validate what she was feeling, but also to introduce a competing feeling of calm.
So I, I could, you know, I could take her hand and gently tap. Myself on that point for her say, yeah, um, e even though, or cuz she was just distraught. So I could say, yeah, even though you're feeling awful right now, even though you're really scared and that, that was really scary. That's okay. It's okay. It's okay that you're feeling that way or I, and you don't even have to.
Because by doing the tapping, you're still sending signals to the body that you're safe. So you don't even have to complete that thought. Just, yeah, this is really scary. So honoring the distress, that's really scary. That was awful. So that's like
Chris McDonald: validating yourself in
Dreya Blume: some way too. Yeah. Oh, exactly. It's this total validation and I, I remember feeling so grateful cuz then I was gently tapping on the points on her face.
You know that in that moment. Right. Telling her everything is, you know, you're okay, you know, everything is fine. You know, that was a lie. You know, she was still very upset. So I, I appreciated having a, a modality that I could use in the moment, uh, that would help kind of recalibrate her. And so when it comes to EF f t, anything that causes distress can be addressed using EF f t.
And so not only emotional things, uh, it can be anything. As well. You know, we, we know that the majority of physical issues are, if not caused, they're exacerbated by stress. Yeah. What about chronic pain? On especially chronic pain. Uh, and so having the ability to impact your, you know, to activate your parasympathetic nervous system.
And the thing about chronic pain, especially if you, if you consider all the messages we tell ourselves like, oh, I wish this weren't happening, or, I hate my body, or How could my body have betrayed me like this? So there's all of this negative messaging, which makes sense. It's, I mean, of course it's legitimate, but it all, all it does is activate the sympathetic nervous system, right, and make things worse and cause inflammation.
So, EF T is great for chronic pain because you can articulate all of that distress, right? You can start tapping, saying, oh, I, I just, I, I'm, I hate that this is happening. Or, I'm really sad because I can't do the things that I used to do anymore, and I'm feeling lonely and isolated. Because you're articulating it out loud or in your head, but also activating parasympathetic nervous system.
You know, you're changing your relationship with that and that's gonna change your relationship with the cri, with the pain. Right? It's kinda the di it's the cliche, but it's true. You know, pain versus suffering. Yes. So yes, e f FT is perfect to avoid marinating in that kind of, um, you know, what's associated with chronic pain.
A lot of that negative messaging that we're giving our.
Chris McDonald: So would it be with chronic pain to say that, but I'm okay. Or I love and accept myself? Well, even though I'm, that's the thing. I'm
Dreya Blume: sad and Yeah, cuz you can feel both, you know, I think with chronic pain, you know, if, if you were my client, I would wanna honor your losses, that chronic pain you have brought to your life.
But also, is it true that nothing else is working though? So what parts of your body are functioning that you can be grateful for? And then we can combine that in the affirmation. We can start Tapp. And say, you know, even though I'm really sad and, and angry at what I've experienced with this chronic pain, at the same time, I'm grateful that I can, uh, still hear because I do love music.
And so that, you know, that is a part of my body that, that is working that I appreciate. And so articulating that while tapping, just like an EMDR where you kind of set things in belief system wise, Through bilateral stimulation. You're doing the same thing with E F T. And so as you're saying those things, they become more real in terms of yeah, this does suck, but there's this other stuff going on that now, now that I'm paying attention to it and tapping on it, it's, it's more resonant now.
Like yeah, I can hear. And I do appreciate the fact that I still can have music in my life.
Chris McDonald: I appreciate that cuz I have chronic pains, , that's why I'm asking.
Dreya Blume: Tell me. Okay, well this is, listen, I wanna tell me, if you don't mind, it's okay. Like I wanna, it's okay. Make you comfortable. We, we can do a little ef f t something together.
Okay? I'm putting you on the spot. I know, but that's okay. I'm a big believer it might help and
Chris McDonald: listeners, you can
Dreya Blume: practice along. Yeah. Do you, and, and you don't have to if you just think, and I for listeners too, I mean, think about anything Yes. That is causing any amount of distress and, and usually an EF f t.
We do start out kind of like emdr, you know, we, we wanna get a baseline. So from zero to 10, zero means you're doing great. 10 means your distress is off the charts. So you know if there is something that's on your mind or bothering you, or again, Chris mentioned chronic pain. You know, if you can measure it, give it a number.
And before I start, let me just say, the other amazing piece of ef ft is you can use it on memory. And anticipatory anxiety. Yes. So if you, if you have a memory and when you remember, Something that makes you feel upset, you can tap on it. And, and this is memory consolidation. A lot of research is done on this.
So, for example, if I said, you know, I, when I think about my dad yelling at me 30 years ago or 40 years ago, you know, I still, ugh, still makes me angry. You can actually tap even though. I'm still really angry and I, I, I feel it, I feel it in my chest when I, I remember at that time I choose to, you know, whatever, right?
I choose to release the anger or it's okay, or I love and accept myself. And with memory consolidation, again, bringing up the distress. Same time, state of relaxation. What we know is when when we activate that memory, it's in play, it's labile. That's what the research shows. And so when you have a competing state like relaxation, uh, it actually is gonna overlay the emotional state associated with that memory.
And so it's not, it's gonna lose its power. Which is beautiful. Yeah. So I, I encourage people and, and that's why you can do it with trauma work. So if there's a memory that's still, maybe something happened yesterday and you're still upset about it, you can do that.
Chris McDonald: Um, well, let's go, let's go give it a try and see if listeners can think of an issue Okay.
For themselves. And then can you walk us through it?
Dreya Blume: Yes. Yes. And I appre I know, like I said, I can, I know since you wanna get going, I know you're passionate, . I know, and I, I, I don't wanna keep us certainly. But think of something right that is bothering you. See if you can't give it a number, zero to 10 and you do wanna focus, I don't want anyone to re-traumatize themselves.
So, you know, pick something that's not gonna overwhelm you, but something that is bothering. And we're just breathing. As I said before, you're gonna take one of your palms. Doesn't matter which one. And you're gonna put it in the karate chop position, so it's sideways with your pinky facing the floor, right?
Your pinky is closest to the floor and right below your pinky. Again, like I said, you should see a line running across your palm, and you're just gonna follow that until it goes to the side of your palm. That's gonna be the acupuncture point, the acupressure point. And so as you start to press or tap, Use whatever force feels intuitively right?
As you're tapping on that point, thinking to yourself, even though it's always the same setup, even though then whatever's bothering you, however you wanna articulate it, even though then the problem, then however you wanna finish it. I love and accept myself or. It's okay. It's okay. Yeah. It's okay that I'm having these feelings or a choice.
How would you like to feel? What would you maybe, even though I'm, I'm feeling stressed. I choose to release the stress or I choose to remember what's going well in my life. So doing that for about three or four rounds. So I'm gonna be quiet, give you the chance to tap on that.
And if other emotions come up, just follow them. Just, yeah. Even though I'm feeling this now. That's okay. Yeah. Notice if other things come up for you. Just follow them and then whenever you're ready, hands on your lap or by your side, it's taking some nice breaths.
Kind of noticing, well, how do you feel in this moment? We're halfway there and now summing up what's bothering you in a word or a short phrase, and either saying it out loud or thinking it in your head, and this is why EFT is a little odd, right? I'm gonna ask you to tap the top of your head. Either with one hand or both hands, but you're gonna use your fingers at the very top of your head, gently tapping, focusing on what's bothering you, and then you're gonna move to where your eyebrows begin by the bridge of your nose, and you're gonna tap on those, those two points, right at your eyebrows, right where they begin.
And focusing on what's causing distress. Then you're gonna move to your temples, where your eyebrows end, and again, focusing on what's bothering you. If anything different is coming up, just follow that gently tapping. Now you're gonna move under your eyes right on the eye socket, but right below. Your eyeball right on the bone of your eye socket.
So it's almost like you've made a circle again, you're focusing on what's bothering you and gently tapping, and whenever you're ready, you're gonna move to under your nose. That little indentation known as the filt, gently tapping on that.
And whenever you're ready, under your bottom lip. So above your chin, but under your bottom lip,
it's noticing how you feel. And then finally, call us the collarbone point. If you find the notch in your sternum, right, there should be the middle of your collarbone. Call that the sternal notch. Right the top of your chest and you find that notch in the center right of your, your collarbone and you drop down one inch and over one inch on each side.
So just gently thumping. I usually use two or three, or sometimes even four fingers, so it's my upper chest. , and again, if, if the, if your sternal notch is the center is the middle of your collarbone, you're gonna be right off to the side on either side of that sternal notch, just gently thumping and again, focusing on what's bothering you, and you can thump at the same time or with alternating rhythm, whatever rhythm feels right.
I usually alternate almost like I'm drumming, focusing on what's bothering. And then whenever you're ready, just putting your hands on your lap or by your side and taking some nice, deep yet gentle breaths. Just noticing how you're feeling at this point. See what you notice with your body. That number you had assigned before to your distress, is it, is it the same?
Is it lower? Is it higher? Usually if it's the same or higher, it means that there's something underlying. Mine's lower. Definitely thought. Is it lower? Yeah.
Chris McDonald: Yeah. Oh, you know what's interesting? I didn't even know how I felt until you said like, what is the emotion? I think you said, and I was like, whoa, wait a second.
Where did that anxiety come from?
Dreya Blume: Yeah. I think when we give ourselves the time and the space things, that's it. Come up. Yeah.
Chris McDonald: I'm just checking in with my pain too.
Dreya Blume: Yeah, and what I tell people what's beautiful is that the points always stay the same, but we can cha, we can experiment and play around with language.
So you can, ideally we get to zero or one. So if you're at a four or a three, you know, doing another round, but choosing another way to describe what you're feeling or or asking. You know, what might be an underlying emotion here, but you can experiment. Very easily with this to get the right, uh, verbalizations.
Uh, thank you
Chris McDonald: so much for doing this today cause I know it's hard on audio to give directions without video. Yeah.
Dreya Blume: Thanks for that. I hope that when people's appetites, yeah,
Chris McDonald: no, I feel great. Thank you, .
Dreya Blume: I appreciate it. Oh, you're welcome. You deserve that.
Chris McDonald: This is wonderful and I hope listeners that you got some positive effect from that too.
So where can listeners find you and learn more
Dreya Blume: about you? Oh, thanks for asking. Uh, drea bloom.com. Yeah, I've got a website and I, every so often I've, I, I do trainings in emotional freedom technique. I've got one coming up in several weeks actually. But any trainings that I have will be on my Drea bloom.com site and, uh, yeah, it's a good way to keep up to date with what I've got going.
Chris McDonald: Well, thanks so much for coming back on the podcast. Are you?
Dreya Blume: Oh my gosh, Chris, thank you for, for letting me again go on and on. I, I realize, yes, this is great. Oh my gosh, this a lot of great information. Oh, thank you. I do feel strongly, I feel it. It, it is very, very simple and it, it, it really is a type of emotional first aid, and you can do it.
I don't care how young a, a child is, right? It's, it's good for any age. And I, I do feel that, you know, because it's available and you can learn it for free on YouTube. I, I, I do just feel that everyone.
Chris McDonald: And thank you for tuning in today to another episode of the Holistic Counseling Podcast. Do you struggle with making yourself a priority?
In my webinar series, holistic Self-Care Boundaries for Therapists, you'll learn how to set emotional, physical, and energetic boundaries, as well as some hands on skills to help you stay grounded. Check it email@example.com slash holistic webinars, and thank you so much for tuning in. And I send each one of you much light in love.
Until next time, take care. Thanks for being here and listening to this episode. Do you struggle to find time for self-care and end up at the bottom of your to-do list? My one hour webinar? Holistic Self-Care boundaries for therapists is for you. Learn how to show up for yourself. I set emotional, physical, and energetic boundaries.
Check it out firstname.lastname@example.org slash holistic dash.