Welcome to the first episode of Overcoming Your Story by your host Miriam Njoku. Miriam has a passion for psychology and uses this and her own experiences to coach others and help them free themselves from the burdens of childhood trauma. She is trying to destigmatise many topics in African culture, including discussions around mental health and aims to help as many women as she can live a more successful and liberating life.

In this episode, Miriam talks about her own story as an African daughter. Mother-daughter relationships are a delicate topic, but it’s important to talk about things that are difficult, especially if it can help you heal and provide a template and learning that can help others do the same.

KEY TAKEAWAYS 

• There is a lot of taboo and shame around admitting you have a difficult relationship with your mother. But Miriam believes by being honest and relaying her feelings she can move forward.

• Miriam was born after her mother had lost a child at 8 months old and was in a marriage she did not choose. Her mother was under a lot of pressure and was very unhappy with her life, her mother ran away and left Miriam and her sister with their great grandmother whilst she worked and sent money to look after them. Eventually Miriam’s mother did have her daughters move and live with her in Switzerland but by this time Miriam and her sister had suffered a lot of pain and trauma, it felt too late.

• What happened was never discussed or approached, it meant that Miriam stayed angry with her mother and it would sometimes show itself in seemingly unrelated situations. She couldn’t let go of the feelings of abandonment.

• After starting her own family, Miriam decided to challenge the notion of always respecting your mother and sat her mother down and talked to her about her trauma and her true feelings. Miriam knew it was hard for her mother to listen to but it was important for her to know and listen to these things.

• A culture has to be for the people, the moment it no longer works for the people we need to start questioning it. Many African women have difficult relationships with their parents and there are many issues with fear of abandonment, we need to challenge this.

BEST MOMENTS

“No topic is off limits on the Overcoming Your Story podcast”

 “Inside I was still very angry but I would not show it”

“I was trying to take care of everyone’s emotions apart from mine”

“We had to break that generational burden”

“Many, many African women have difficult relationships with their parents”

VALUABLE RESOURCES

ABOUT THE HOST

Miriam is a Trauma Informed Coach, an African, a mom of three daughters, a blogger and writer.  After graduating from the London School of Economics, she built her international career in the fields of banking and international development, working for organisations such as the World Economic Forum, Lombard Odier Private Bank, JP Morgan, the Mastercard Foundation and the United Nations. She now uses her passion for psychology and dedicates her time to coaching others to free themselves from the burden of childhood trauma.  Her wish to help other women connect to their inner wisdom, love themselves and follow their passion. In her effort to destigmatize mental health and normalize mental health conversations in black communities, she wrote her memoir about surviving childhood and finding her worth.  

CONTACT METHOD

Instagram:@overcomingyourstory

Instagram: @_miriamnjoku/

Facebook 

Linkedin

CLUBHOUSE: @miriamnjoku

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