127. Replay: A practical guide to letting go, and finding unexpected happiness, with Katharine Esty, PhD

Artwork for podcast Aging in Style with Lori Williams

24th February 2023 • Aging in Style with Lori Williams • Lori Williams Senior Services

How to find happiness as we age?

Katharine Esty likes to joke that she has “peaked at 87.” A psychologist and activist for aging, she’s also the author of Eightysomethings: A Practical Guide to Letting Go, Aging Well, and Finding Unexpected Happiness. The book contains insights from her interviews with 128 people aged 80+ from all around the country about what it means to age.

Katharine explains how the world becomes smaller in your 80s: friend circles shrink, living spaces downsize, and you even physically shrink. For her, it was uncharted territory, as she was accustomed to keeping up with her family despite her age. However, her own life and her interviews with other people over 80 reveals that they’re a happy group - even happier than people who are decades younger.

She and Senior Living Expert Lori Williams discuss:

-Making accommodations and adaptations as we age

-Finding happiness (and purpose!) as we age

-The 5 types of people coping with health issues

And more.

It’s easy to hold on to the past and memories of who you were before aging. However, when you finally let that go, there’s another side to it – a worthwhile, wonderful life full of new possibilities. And it’s never too late to find pleasure in new things or find a new purpose.

Topics discussed:

-Turning 80

-Attitudes around aging

-Embracing change

-Downsizing / senior housing

-Retirement

-Finding purpose as we age

-Senior happiness

-Staying social as seniors

Takeaways from this episode:

-Happiness is letting go of everything you think your life is supposed to be and celebrating everything it really is.

-It’s important for seniors’ health and emotional well-being to stay connected to other people as they age.

-Research shows that people in their 70s and 80s generally mellow out, are less angry, and worry less.

-The 5 types of people who are coping with health issues are deniers, stoics, realists, complainers, and worriers.

-People are happiest when they have a purpose and are contributing in some way.

-Instead of trying to preserve the life you had, try new things you haven’t done before - you might find another person and a new life on the other side.