It’s happening, the holidays are here my friends Are you ready to have it truly be “the most wonderful time of the year”?  Today we are talking about the Holiday KISS (tune in and find out what that is exactly) and let’s take the stress and mess out of the season. 

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Here are the highlights from this episode:

(01:06) Simple is subjective

(03:52) What are the outcomes you want to create?

(07:30) Things get amped up after Thanksgiving

(10:47) Less do, do, do and more be, be, be

(13:57) We can go crazy in our own heads

As mentioned in this episode:

Share your Curiosity Challenges, learnings, and any questions 

Episode 135 Holidays Without Should

IT'S TIME!

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Hey everyone. I'm Kelly Moak, a coach and a leadership trainer, and I'm super passionate about helping you find out who you are authentically as a leader, own it, and go out and make an impact in your life and the lives of others. This world needs your leadership, your gifts, your unique brilliance, and I believe that real leaders don't wait.

They create, I know firsthand that life is gonna throw us curve. That we're gonna doubt our greatness, our ideas, and our contributions. And my goal is that you believe in yourself beyond reason. And I get to be a coach and a champion for you each week so that you feel inspired, motivated, and most important in action toward your unique impact in this world.

So let's jump in. Hey there everyone. It's Coach Kelly and welcome to episode 137 of, let's be Honest, before we start pretending, and today we are talking about. The holiday kiss. And what do I mean by the holiday kiss? Well, here's what I mean. Holidays, keep it super simple. Keep it super simple, and whatever simple means to you, I always wanna say that it's never what I think simple is or what everybody else thinks.

Simple is what's simple to you and what would simple bring you? If your holidays were simple, what would it bring? Before we dive in to Holiday Kiss, I wanna share with all of you that I have an amazing three day challenge coming up this week. It is called the Empower Her Challenge, and it is December 7th, eighth, and ninth, plus three amazing bonuses.

It is going to be, uh, amazing, amazing, amazing, amazing. And you are invited. Go to the show notes. There is a link there that you can sign up. You are not too late. It starts this Wednesday and it's three days plus. There's some amazing bonuses that I can't tell you what they are because they are a surprise and they are really awesome If you can't be there live.

No worries, sign up because you'll get the replay and you will have the tools. So we don't let time be an obstacle. No, we don't. So check it out. Go sign up. It's $27 and it is worth every single penny plus more. Honestly, it's priceless. Okay? So come join me. It's gonna be amazing and I look forward to seeing you there.

Keep it super simple. We talked in November about holidays without the should, and we utilized a tool called Pop It where you got to really look at what are the outcomes that you wanted to create. That's the O in Pop, and then your purpose. That's the P like. And why is it important? And then the final P, the third P, well, it's the second P, but it's the third letter in Popit in Pop of Popit.

Is your process, essentially, what is it that has got to occur or what are the things that you wanna get done, or what are the things that you, you know, the steps that you wanna take towards creating those outcomes goes in the process part. That's essentially the mechanics and the how. I always say never pass, go without really understanding your purpose and outcomes for something.

So you might remember I was talking about, I was so excited for the Thanksgiving holiday because we were, you know, it's been a while since our family has and extended family has all been together in person. Well, don't you know, we had family that got sick and so we got to pivot and create different experiences, but still stay connected.

We had a wonderful Thanksgiving. We got together with one of my son's girlfriend's family, and it was so much fun and we enjoy them so much and it was great. I was really missing seeing even more of my family and extended family for sure. And so we, we pivoted and we created different experiences and still made sure that we connected.

It looked totally different than we thought it would, but if you remember, the thing that I was the most excited about was the connection. And you know what we created that. Pivoting. Literally pivoting and changing on the very, very same day. And so what did that take? What that took was. The holiday kiss, as I like to call it, keeping it super simple.

And it also took being flexible, right? Being flexible. It took being open, it took being okay with being sad or disappointed even for, you know, a few minutes. And then shifting back to what do we wanna create and, and connect and truly not letting circumstances. Invade, if you will, the holiday or connection for the holiday, because guess what?

If we're learning anything, we are learning that so much is out of our control. So much is out of our control, but what is in our control is the experience that we want to create. Period. Done. We had a wonderful and fantastic and super fun Thanksgiving. And we pivoted. And did we all get to see each other in person?

No, we didn't. And did we get to connect? Yes, we did. And it was meaningful, absolutely meaningful connection in the different ways that we had that happen. So, I am here for it. I am grateful and we have all gotten really clear about setting our intention for everybody being really healthy through the holidays and we're, we are gonna make it happen.

We are, we are going to get together. I know it. I feel it in my bones. So as we're beginning to look at the holidays and it's more time to come together, and I don't know what it is, but it gets amped up after Thanksgiving. It really, really does. I personally was blown away with, and this is coming from zero judgment.

When you hear me say this, it was like Halloween and then November 1st, suddenly Christmas. Now we see that in the stores. This is not uncommon. Halloween happens and the next day. Here's Christmas and Christmas will happen and you'll kind of like skip by New Year's really super quick and literally Valentine's Day in the stores, right?

Well, the same thing is true for Christmas. You don't really see a big like. Unless we're talking about some turkeys, you don't see a lot about Thanksgiving, but yet Thanksgiving is such a special time to really connect and be thankful and be in gratitude, and it, it, it absolutely does not get, get skipped and I don't know what it is, but I have a fast rule that I will not, will not decorate until literally the day after Thanksgiving.

And so, even. Oh my goodness. I was seeing it everywhere. All over social media, like the amazing decorations, houses. All the things, and I was feeling a little, who knew am I behind? This can happen from time to time. Oh my gosh. It's kind of like back during the pandemic, everybody was reorganizing their homes and doing some remodeling and all the things, and I was like, am I doing it wrong?

No, I wasn't doing it wrong. Actually, it created a podcast and that was like a reorganization in itself. The bottom line is this who care? Who cares. You know what we, we, we create what we wanna create and we create it when we wanna create it. And so I just was blown away though, at how fast it felt like Hanukkah and Christmas were coming.

Right? Just like, boom, just like that. So, Kudos to all of you who 100% were on top of that and made stuff happen. And kudos to those of you who are like, Nope, I got a rule. And it happens right after Thanksgiving. However you make it happen. Whenever you make it happen, as long as you're, you know, enjoying that, that's what matters.

That's what matters. Okay? So all of a sudden it's, you know, now, We're coming up on the end of Thanksgiving. It's literally, there's just a couple more days of November as I am literally recording this right now, and I'm like, oh, I'm feeling the pressure, like it's on, like get the decorations up, you know, the tree, the holiday cards, the what are we doing?

Do we have the list? Do we have the things, da, da, da. It was a lot. It's a lot of doing. It's a lot of doing. And so it just reminded me like. Holiday, kiss, holiday. Keep it super simple. Okay? Keep it super simple. So I'm gonna offer this all to you. What experience do you want in December? Whether you are celebrating Hanukkah or Christmas or Kwanza or the holidays that you are celebrating that are really important and meaningful to you?

What do you wanna create during this season? During the season, and we are going. Go through these wonderful holidays and then we are going to end this season. We're gonna end this year, and I, I wanna offer you where do you wanna land? Where do you wanna land? What's the experience that you wanna have? Do you wanna enjoy?

Do you wanna have some rest? Do you wanna connect? Do you want to rejuvenate? Do you want to have fun? Do you want to, like, what's the experience that you wanna have? What is that experience name it. Claim it and then get to being about it, right? This is the time of year where we move straight into doing and we forget who we're being

We do. We're like, it's do, do, do. I got the list, list list. Let's go, go, go. And we forget about who am I being? Through this time, and it's so important to really check in and look at who am I being, what are the ways of being that are gonna really support me through this time is being joyful, is being calm, is being present, is being loving, is being fun.

It really, really does. And so I offer you this. Take pressure off wherever you feel pressure. Find someone who you trust, who knows you, that you can bounce it back and forth. Y'all have heard, uh, GIA Huwi on this podcast a few times. She was just on a few episodes ago. Super, super fun. We got to hear her update.

We work together and she is someone who I will go to and I will say, here's what I'm thinking. And she knows me so well that she'll say, let's look at this. And she knows me so well that she knows the question. What's the experience you wanna create? What's the outcome that you want? What's the purpose you want?

And she'll ask me those questions to get me from, you know, like I gotta do, do, do to wait who? Hold on. She helps me rethink it and I will do the same for her. Okay. We do, I do this with my clients all the time. All the time. And so it's always really awesome. In fact, we just had a meeting earlier today and it was really awesome cuz I was like feeling a little like.

There's a lot to do. I wasn't feeling overwhelmed. I was feeling anxious. I was feeling anxious, and that's not really a feeling I love, and we sort of, you know, looked at what was really important and what was the experience that I wanted to create, and then we chunked it down. No accidents. I was recording this podcast today and got to live it live and in person, so, The reason I share this is because have someone that you can go to and bounce this off of, because sometimes when we're in our own head, we can get kind of, we can get kind of, we can get kind of crazy.

I don't know if y'all remember an episode last year after I broke my elbow, which by the way, it's been an actual year since that's happened and I'm super happy to report. It's doing fantastic. It's doing fantastic. Um, I broke my elbow. Had surgery and then my husband was helping me with the Christmas tree and I don't know what happened, but suddenly, like perfection kicked in and I got super bossy and he was helping.

He does not decorate the tree. That's not his favorite thing to do, right? It doesn't bring him joy. Other parts of the holiday do, but not necessarily that. But he was helping me out. He was helping me out, and he knew that that would be a tremendous help. And I just got super bossy about it. And I'm like, my perfection kicked in and it wasn't looking like the Christmas trees I see out there

Okay. And I got kinda kind of bossy and nasty about it until I went, hold on a sec. This is not the experience that I wanna create during this holiday season, and especially with my husband. So I had to check myself because I was wrecking myself. Okay, so you wanna start out and you wanna take a look?

What's the experience I wanna create? Why is that important to me? Okay. Why is that important to me? And what are the ways of being that are gonna support that? Remember, patient, calm, present, kind, joyful, loving. Those are some of the ways of being that could really support having a wonderful holiday season.

You might look at what are the ways of being, I don't wanna bring in like nasty or bossy . Okay? You might wanna look at that too. And watch for triggers. Watch for triggers that could possibly trigger that, like perfection kicking in. That's gonna trigger that that is not something you want. And then arm yourself with something that's gonna help you snap out of it.

Okay? Snap out of it. Maybe it's even like a snap out of it. All right to share. From Moonstruck Snap out of it. I can't even do it. I'm not, I'm butchering that. Let's not go there. Um, Cher, if you're listening, my apologies for even trying to, um, for even trying to, um, imitate your voice. I love Cher. Do you guys love Cher?

I love Cher. Okay, so remember, a, what's the experience I wanna create in this holiday kiss? Why is that important to me? Why is that important to me? You can also include why that would be important to. I think that's a great question to ask. What are the ways of being that are going to absolutely support that happening, and what are some of the ways of being that you absolutely don't wanna bring in?

Notice what might trigger that and have something in play that will help you snap out of it. Okay? And then by all means, remember, pop it. If not, go back to that episode. I'll link it in the show notes. Utilize it. I tell you. It works every single time and you will also be able to, should things occur that are out of your control and you are required to pivot, you'll be able to pivot and still meet your intention for your holiday kiss your holiday.

Keep it super simple. Simple is whatever it means to you, whatever it means to you. I will share with you my simple is being connected. It's not about doing connection. Okay? So that's my simple being connected. That is always gonna be the go-to for me to have things be simple. And simple is also I want people to know they matter.

And so it's also about being thoughtful. All right, so that's what we have today in holiday kiss. Keep it super simple, whatever that means to you. I am excited about what December is bringing. I cannot believe we are here. That's insanity to me, but hey, now here we go. They years fly by. So remember, we've got the three day challenge coming up December 7th, eighth and ninth, plus three amazing bonuses.

And, um, go to the show notes, click if you wanna join us. It's gonna be amazing. It is called Empower Her, and it is going to be awesome. All right. Remember, you have a choice to lead your life or follow your circumstances. Life is about knowing. Your passions, your purpose, your values, and what simple means to you and what you wanna create as far as the impact in your life and the life of others.

And you know what? Who emerges from taking the lead in their lives? Well, guess what? They're authentic, they're vulnerable, they're courageous, and they are creating the experiences that they wanna create all along the way, even if a pivot is required. Things do not always look the way we think they're supposed to, and we really do get to trust that more is always revealed as we move forward.

So remember, take those pauses, let go of worry. Let go of doubt and live fully the best version of yourself. Thank you so much for listening today. I know there was great value for you is you move through your day and take the lead in your. I'd love to stay connected. Remember, go to the Curiosity Challenge link and drop in and tell me what's up, how you're doing, what you're noticing by being curious as we round out this year.

And so here's to a great month ahead of us and a great week ahead. And if it's not shaping up the way you want it to, Take the lead and create a fantastic one. I cannot wait to talk with you all next week. We have an amazing guest that's joining us. I've got a couple of guests joining us this month. It's gonna be so fun.

So, Have a great week ahead. Bye. Thanks for listening to another episode of, let's Be Honest, before we start pretending for more resources on taking the lead in your life, head over to kelly j moc.com and connect with me on Instagram at Coach Kelly moc. If this episode was helpful for you, please feel free to share it with friends.

Rate and review it on iTunes. That's Apple Podcast now, and at any time, feel free to connect with me and let me know what you want to hear next or what you're working on. I'm happy to help. Thanks again for listening, and here's to you taking the lead in your life.