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Breaking the Silence- Addressing Mental Health at Work
Episode 199 • 31st December 2024 • TonyTidbit: A Black Executive Perspective • TonyTidbit ™
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Episode Audio Link: https://podcast.ablackexec.com/episode/Breaking the Silence- Addressing Mental Health at Work

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In this episode of the Black Executive Perspective podcast, host Tony Tidbit is joined by Dr. Patrice LeGoy, an international psychologist and licensed marriage and family therapist, and Matt Schuster, co-founder of Addra Labs. Together, they explore the complexities of mental health in the workplace, particularly within corporate America. The discussion covers personal experiences, societal pressures, and actionable strategies for individuals and organizations to support mental well-being. Key takeaways include the importance of self-care, the power of open communication, and the role of managers in creating a supportive work environment. This episode aims to normalize conversations about mental health, offering practical advice for supervisors to help their teams effectively manage mental health issues.

▶︎ In This Episode

00:00: Introduction to Workplace Mental Health

00:42: Welcome to the Podcast

01:15: Meet the Guests: Dr. Patrice LeGoy and Matt Schuster

02:20: Personal Stories and Experiences

10:11: The Importance of Addressing Mental Health at Work

20:25: Challenges and Triggers in the Workplace

30:31: Building a Supportive Work Environment

37:57: The Pressure to Hide Emotions

39:23: Internal Strategies for Stress Management

39:57: Normalizing Conversations About Stress

42:29: Matt's Personal Experience with Stress

46:01: Reframing and Mindfulness Techniques

51:39: The Power of Self-Talk

58:17: Supporting Mental Health in the Workplace

01:03:41: Final Thoughts and Call to Action

🔗 Resources

Links and resources mentioned in this episode:

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Transcripts

Speaker:

Dr. Patrice LeGoy: You want to be

in a position where you can be open

2

:

and creative and honest, right?

3

:

That's how employers get

the best work out of people.

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:

That's how you feel that you are

part of a team that you want to work

5

:

really hard with and really hard for,

you know, your, your supervisor, if

6

:

you're all kind of in agreement that

you can bring your full self to work.

7

:

Um, I think that employers are starting

to recognize that, but I also think

8

:

that they are hesitant to, to talk

about mental health in the workplace

9

:

because I think If they're concerned,

they may open up a can of worms that

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:

they don't know how to deal with.

11

:

Tony Tidbit: We'll discuss race and how it

plays a factor in how we didn't even talk

12

:

about this topic because we were afraid.

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:

BEP Narrator: A Black

Executive Perspective.

14

:

Tony Tidbit: Welcome to a Black

Executive Perspective podcast.

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:

A safe space where we discuss all

matters related to race, especially

16

:

race in corporate America.

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:

I'm your host, Tony Tidbit.

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:

So before we get started for a very

impactful episode, I want to remind

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:

everyone that please don't forget to

check out our partners at CodeM Magazine,

20

:

whose mission is saving the Black family

by first, uh, Saving the black man.

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:

So go and check out their content at code.

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:

M magazine.

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:

com.

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:

That is code M magazine.

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:

com.

26

:

So today we're going to

explore mental health in the

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:

workplace with our guests, Dr.

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Patrice LeGoy and Matt Schuster.

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Matt is going to be kindly enough to

share his personal experiences with

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:

mental health challenges at the workplace.

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In addition, we'll discuss internal

and external triggers that affect

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mental well being and how they

play out in professional settings.

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Dr.

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Legoy will analyze these experiences

and offer practical strategies

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:

for individuals and organizations

to support mental health.

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:

Our goal here today, everyone,

is to enlighten people at work,

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supervisors and peers on managing

these issues, effectively promoting

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a healthier workplace for all.

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So Dr.

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Patrice LeGoy, Matt Schuster, welcome

to a Black Executive Perspective

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Podcast, my brother and my sister.

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:

Dr. Patrice LeGoy:

Thank you for having us.

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:

Matt Schuster: Thanks, Tony.

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:

Tony Tidbit: Well, look, I'm

excited to dive into this.

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You know, we, Matt, you and I

got to give you a lot of credit.

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My brother, you came on BEP and you

talked openly about some of the challenges

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that you went through, which showed

a lot of courage for you to do that.

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And so having Dr.

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Legoy on here, who, was also a

former guest, at least a couple of

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times on BET and she talked about

being mindful of your mental health.

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So this will be great to be able

to have both of you talk about this

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issue to educate others in something

that has been more taboo, but we

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got to get out of the taboo ness and

really be able to put it on the table

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because this is something in that.

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All people deal with at some point,

and that includes your host here.

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But before we dive into it and get

into the deep, heavy stuff, Dr.

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Legoy, Matt Schuster, why don't you tell

us, give the audience a little bit about

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your background, where are you currently

residing and tell us about your family.

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Dr. Patrice LeGoy: Uh, I'll get started.

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Um, so I am an international

psychologist and licensed

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:

marriage and family therapist.

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I live in Los Angeles.

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with my son who's eight and my

husband and we have a big shepherd

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mix, a hundred pound dog named Cosmo.

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Um, so our house is never quiet, but

I, uh, before becoming a psychologist

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and a therapist, I worked in

entertainment for about 15 years.

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Um, so complete pivot and, uh,

you know, I love talking to

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you, Tony, because I get to.

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Remember the corporate side of everything.

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And then also talk about it from

a psychological point of view

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and, um, and just in a quest for

mental wellness, like in all facets

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of our life, including at work.

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Tony Tidbit: Well, that is awesome.

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And I love the pivot, right?

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Um, that is great.

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Matt did that as well, the pivot.

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So we are talking about it, right?

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Um, so thank you.

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Welcome to the show.

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Matt Schuster, tell us

a little bit, buddy.

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What's your background?

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Tell us where you reside in, and

a little bit about your family.

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Matt Schuster: Yeah, thanks Tony.

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And, uh, I was gonna say, uh, Dr.

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LeGoy, that's a, it's, it's eerily

similar to, uh, the trajectory I took.

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So, um, so I'm currently living

in, uh, northern New Jersey

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:

in a town called Glenrock.

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:

Um, I am, uh, presently the co-founder

of a new sports nutrition company called

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Addra Labs, uh, where we make, uh, sports

nutrition products for endurance athletes.

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We just actually launched the

company about a month and a half

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ago with, uh, the first protein bar

designed for endurance athletes.

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:

Um, prior to that, I was, uh,

also in the corporate world.

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So I worked in advertising, uh,

advertising sales and technology

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and, um, around 2020 went into

a pretty strong pivot as well.

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From a world of community, the city,

uh, and corporate life into becoming,

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you know, an aspiring athlete and

into the world of endurance sport.

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And that kind of led to some

of the things that we're going

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to be talking about today.

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Um, but none of this could be

possible without my partner in crime.

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Uh, my wife, Rachel, uh, who is the CEO

of the house and puts up with a lot of my.

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A lot of my, uh, shenanigans and nonsense,

um, and then we have, uh, two little

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ones, Jack and Max, uh, nine and five,

uh, and then our, our oldest son is our

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dog Howie, who is not quite the same size.

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Um, as yours, Dr.

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LeGoy, but, uh, he's 11 going on

five and you know, we love him.

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Tony Tidbit: That was awesome, buddy.

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I love it.

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And I'm hearing a theme here, you

know, not just in terms of, well,

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east Coast, west Coast, okay.

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Uh, pivoting in terms of one

industry moving to another right.

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Family, and then you got the biggest

kid in the family is the dogs.

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:

Okay.

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So, so, I mean, we got so many

similarities here and I got to say this

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about Matt's, um, new company, uh, Addra

Labs all right, the protein bars are.

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Fabulous.

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Uh, you know, I'm addicted to

the apple pie one to be honest.

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Okay.

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So, you know, uh, BP is

a sponsor of Addra Labs.

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Um, so it's definitely something

that you want to check out regardless

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:

if you are high endurance athlete

or you just work out a couple of

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days a week to stay in shape and

you want to eat something healthy.

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You definitely want to check out his

product and we'll have more information

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on that at the end of the show.

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:

So more importantly, thank you guys

for giving us a little bit about you.

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Now, the question I ask, and

I'll kick this off with Dr.

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Legoy, look, you've been

on here a couple of times.

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You are well renowned.

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You've been on a bunch of shows.

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I've seen you with little Wayne.

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I've seen you all over the place, right?

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You're in high demand.

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We're Why did you want to come on a

black executive perspective podcast?

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Talk about this topic.

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Dr. Patrice LeGoy: Well, you

know, Tony, I'd jump at any

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opportunity to speak with you.

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I just think you bring, uh, such

insightful comments and, um, Really

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mindful about everyone that you encounter.

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And I just really appreciate that.

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And I think for this particular topic, you

know, hearing that story, it just reminded

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me, like, there is no way to exclude

whatever has happened with you internally.

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From how you present in the

rest of the world, and we're at

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:

work many hours out of the days.

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:

Often spend more time with people at work

than you do with your own family, right?

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And so I think it's, uh, it's really

impossible to ignore that you are going

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:

to bring, you know, whatever challenges

that you are dealing with into work.

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Sometimes your challenges are exacerbated

by work, um, depending on, you know,

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your situation and your coworkers.

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And I think that we have yet

to figure out a lot of good

149

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ways to talk about it at work.

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Right.

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And so, um, I, I just thought this was

such a relevant topic and to be able to

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do that with the two of you, you know,

I think it's just, it's such a pleasure.

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Tony Tidbit: That is awesome.

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Mr.

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Schuster, you were on here before.

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I mean, listen, like I said, I

give you a lot of buddy that was,

157

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and you blew me away and we've

been friends for almost 20 years.

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:

So why'd you want to come back

and talk about this topic?

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Matt Schuster: Uh, two reasons actually.

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So one is, um, you know, some of the,

some of the experiences I had, I haven't

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With anyone really outside of my

immediate family and, uh, only in

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the last couple of months have I

actually started opening up about it.

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And the biggest thing I learned

was the more I shared, the more

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:

other people felt or experienced or

encountered many of the same things.

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:

And what, what really came to

light was the more you can share,

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:

the more you can talk about it,

the more you can normalize it.

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Um, the more people feel more

comfortable talking about it.

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So if y'all.

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This was an awesome opportunity to use

the platform that you built and really

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Normalize talking about something

that's got that stigma and then the

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second reason was Um, you know, almost

a little over a year ago today, I

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listened to your first episode with Dr.

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Legoy and I remember

saying, wow, she's awesome.

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And when I heard it was the

opportunity to do a show together, I

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was like, yeah, I want it selfishly

because I want to pick her brain.

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Um, so, uh, and I don't claim to have

all the answers and, you know, my

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experience is, you know, an end of

one, but you know, if, if hearing the

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story and hearing the things that I.

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Did and went through and the tools I

used is helpful for others then So be it.

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Um, but having Dr.

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LeGoy to have a level of expertise

along with it is, is even better.

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Tony Tidbit: Wow.

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Wow.

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Well, thank you, buddy.

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You guys are both givers and

we're so excited that you're here

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to talk about something that's

going to help a lot of people.

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:

So you guys ready to talk about it?

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Matt Schuster: Yes.

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Ready?

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Tony Tidbit: All right.

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So let's talk about it.

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So, Dr.

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LeGoy, I'm going to come

to you first, right?

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Let's set the stage, right?

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When we talk about mental health and we

talk about mental health in the workplace,

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what are some of the common issues about

mental health in the workplace that people

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typically deal with, but don't share?

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Dr. Patrice LeGoy: Yes, I think

in a lot of workplaces, there is a

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natural hierarchy that exists, right?

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And there is a pressure that

comes with, Trying to advance.

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So you are constantly in this kind of rat

race of like, okay, I have this job now.

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This is my salary.

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What's the next step?

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What's the next step?

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And I think it's difficult when we're in

that place to find ourselves ever really

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satisfied with where we are in the moment.

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Um, I think that's one of the

things just constantly trying to

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achieve, which is not a negative.

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In and of itself, but it doesn't

really give much space for us to be

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in the present, to be enjoying the

things that we're doing right now.

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Um, you know, there's also

whatever's happening in the world

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is happening at work, right?

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So, like, for instance, right now, a lot

of people are thinking about the election.

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So if you, however, you feel you are

taking that with you to work, maybe

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you're avoiding certain conversations.

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Maybe you're talking more to people

who, you know, you agree with,

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um, but it still is, you know, Is

bringing outside factors into work

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that can be very stressful, right?

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Um, for people.

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And, you know, I think just that

the pressure to act like everything

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is great that there's nothing

can touch you is is very real.

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When you're at work, whether in a

position of leadership or you're trying

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to be in a position of leadership,

you don't really want to show how

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vulnerable you are in situations.

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It's just it's not really modeled for us.

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And most of the time.

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And so if you don't see that,

See anyone showing vulnerability.

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You don't see anyone acknowledging

that they're having a tough time.

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You don't feel that there's

space for you to do that either.

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Right.

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And so we hold things in, we repress

the feelings that we're having and they

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build and they build and they build.

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And so I think that.

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You know, those are some

of the main pressures.

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It's just a product of being in that

workplace and being in society, right?

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Those that those issues.

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And on top of that, we might have

other things going on that are

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:

also aggravated by trying to put

on, um, this mask at work, right?

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And trying to keep up that image that

we have created with our coworkers.

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Tony Tidbit: So, and look.

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You're 100 percent right.

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I saw Matt nodding his head.

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And obviously, there's probably another

arm length of issues that go in that from

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family issues to, you know, there's a

societal you talked a little bit about,

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but there's a million things that people

carry baggage that they come in with.

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Right.

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And that can, you know, they may even

start a job with mental health issues.

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Okay.

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So now, yeah.

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You know, we're talking about work.

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We talk about corporate America, you

know, businesses are like, we have a

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business here and, you know, at the end

of the day, we're hiring you to do a job.

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And at the end of the day, we want you to

do this job at the best of your ability.

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That's going to allow us to sell

more widgets or make more revenue

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or whatever the case may be.

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So, why is it crucial for companies

to address these issues proactively

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when, like you said, And we all grew

up before they, this was a taboo.

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You didn't even do, you just

got finished saying it, right?

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If you bring it up and man to

talk about his story, it's, it

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could be perceived as a weakness.

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It goes against you moving forward.

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It doesn't, now people looking at

you sideways, you know, so all the

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things, the fear that we have in

terms of talking about it, right.

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Why is it important that

the companies now really.

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Focus on this and make this an important

thing to deal with in the workplace.

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Dr. Patrice LeGoy: I'd be really

interested to hear what Matt has to say.

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I think from my point of view, I

recognize that you don't get the

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entire ability of an employee who

is, who is not able to be present.

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You don't get, you don't get to see

what they're actually capable of.

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When they are trying to hold so much

in and just get through the day, right?

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Like no one wants to be in

a position where you're just

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trying to get through the day.

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You want to be in a position where you can

be open and creative and honest, right?

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That's how employers get

the best work out of people.

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That's how you.

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feel that you are part of a team that you

want to work really hard with and really

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hard for, you know, your, your supervisor.

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If, if you're all kind of in agreement

that you can bring your full self to work.

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Um, I think that employers are starting

to recognize that, but I also think

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that they are hesitant to, to talk

about mental health in the workplace

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because I think that they're concerned

they might open up a can of worms

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that they don't know how to deal with.

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I really should just be like, from your

perspective, Matt, what do you think,

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why do you think it should be important?

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Matt Schuster: Yeah, I think that last

point you made is spot on because,

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you know, when I was, um, in my

last role in the corporate world,

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I was, uh, chief revenue officer.

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So I was 1 of 3 executives overseeing

a large chunk of a company.

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And, um, it was, it was pre pandemic.

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Um, so I know that a lot of the, the

emphasis and, um, you know, a lot of

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the interesting solutions that have come

about really came outta the, the response

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to lockdowns and things like that.

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But, but even then, it just wasn't

something that was top of mind because.

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Especially at a startup or midsize

company, you have so many priorities,

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you have so many things and some days

you're just trying to keep the lights

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on and, you know, tackling a, a systemic

issues such as mental health is very, very

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labor intensive for these organizations

and a lot of them just don't have the

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infrastructure to take on the project.

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So either they roll out something

that falls flat because it's not fully

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baked, um, or they just prioritize other

things because it's not something that's

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mainstream, um, in the corporate world.

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Um, the one thing that I will say

though, is there, there is this common

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understanding around mental health as

a term being very black and white in

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terms of you have mental health problems.

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But when you look at any other,

um, uh, type of health, physical

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health, fitness, illness, it's not,

it, it, there's a spectrum and, and

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mental health is not something that

you are either good or bad with.

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It's, it's always there.

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There's always something going on.

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Even the most confident, successful,

incredible humans on the planet have

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days that are good and days that are bad.

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And just like with exercise.

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Mental health is something that you have

to work towards yourself on an ongoing

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basis and we've, we've really taken the

phrase and turned it into, or it is really

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reflected as something negative when

in actuality it's something that we all

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have to deal with on a day to day basis.

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Tony Tidbit: Dr.

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LeGoy, what's your thoughts on that?

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Dr. Patrice LeGoy: I think that's

such an important point you make,

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Matt, that it is a spectrum.

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Um, and.

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Day to day, you might get it.

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You might get a different version

of what's going on with me.

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And that the point isn't to be healed

for every day to be perfect for you

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to never have any problems, right?

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It's more that when something comes

up that you can take a moment.

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You can process it.

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You can manage it so it doesn't have to

spill over into other parts of your life.

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But I'm so glad that you brought

that up because I think, I think that

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you're, you're correct that people

think mental health is something to

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achieve or mental, you know, having

challenges is something to avoid.

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And that's, it's just not possible.

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I mean, you, you go through your

life, there's going to be challenges.

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It's how, how do we learn

how to deal with them?

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What are the tools that

are available to us?

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So that when, not if these

problems come up, We, we know

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how, we know how to manage them.

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You know, we know who is

safe for us to talk with.

339

:

We know what we need to do for

ourselves, all of those things.

340

:

And I think that it's just, I'm really

glad that you, that you brought that up.

341

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342

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344

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345

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346

:

Tony Tidbit: And speaking of that,

so Matt, why don't you dovetail

347

:

and talk to us a little bit about

some of the things that, and you,

348

:

so number one, let me back up.

349

:

You make it, you just made an

excellent point, um, and I'm glad Dr.

350

:

LeGoy, um, you know, added to it.

351

:

And it's something, you know, there's an

old saying, words paint pictures, okay?

352

:

So when you say mental health, the

picture in somebody's mind is This person

353

:

is crazy or this person is off or this

person versus This person is like you

354

:

guys just got finished saying there's

one and it could be a confidence area

355

:

There could be an area of you know,

am I do I um, uh, am I smart enough?

356

:

There can be an imposter syndrome

area There can be and and I doctor

357

:

who i'm just throwing stuff out You

can dive into you'll dive into it

358

:

further, but there's different little

things that we all go through Right.

359

:

And Matt, what you just got

from the saying was key.

360

:

I don't care if you come

across and somebody think

361

:

they're superman or superwoman.

362

:

There's a day.

363

:

There's a time frame.

364

:

There's a moment where they all of

a sudden kryptonite comes up and

365

:

they feel the lowest of the low.

366

:

Right.

367

:

And it'd be no different than

when you talk physical health.

368

:

Excuse me.

369

:

Yeah.

370

:

Physical health where you catch cold.

371

:

Okay.

372

:

Or, you know, this leg hurts.

373

:

Okay.

374

:

Or, you know, whatever, and

then it's just, it's just one.

375

:

Oh, you got a code.

376

:

You'll be fine.

377

:

All right.

378

:

But when you say mental

health, oh, what do we got it?

379

:

So there's a lot of education.

380

:

So why don't you start off by talking

to the audience about, um, The

381

:

things, the challenges that you were

going through, Matt, and then Dr.

382

:

Legoy, you can jump in from there.

383

:

Matt Schuster: Sure.

384

:

Yeah.

385

:

Um, so the, uh, I won't

go all the way back.

386

:

We'll keep it, keep it somewhat concise.

387

:

If you want to hear the full story,

you can listen to the previous episode.

388

:

Um, but, uh, basically,

uh, I had, like Dr.

389

:

LeGoy had mentioned, um, gotten onto

that escalator, chasing the top of the

390

:

corporate ladder and, you know, went

through a career that started as a

391

:

salesperson, progressed into management,

and ultimately, uh, led to, you know, a

392

:

chief executive, uh, role, uh, running

a large part of an organization.

393

:

you know, along the way, um, some of

the key foundational pieces of my mental

394

:

psyche never formed and never developed.

395

:

And what happened was, is that one

of the things they don't tell you is

396

:

the closer you get to the top, the

more lonely it gets and your peer set

397

:

shrinks and your confidence shrink.

398

:

And.

399

:

You know, those that you can confide

in become fewer and fewer, uh, and if

400

:

you are someone that hasn't developed

certain key traits, those traits being,

401

:

One, um, a foundation of priorities

of self-worth that aren't just tied

402

:

to the work that you do at that job.

403

:

Um, if your entire validation system

is based on your work output, you're

404

:

basically one bad day away from being,

you know, tipping over the edge.

405

:

Um, two, you, you know, did

not build a support system.

406

:

Basically, just assume that I

would get, you know, folks within

407

:

the organization that would fall

into line or fall into place.

408

:

Similarly, that, um, I may have had

in previous organizations or previous

409

:

roles and, um, you know, that led to,

uh, a point of collapse and burnout

410

:

and, um, in spectacular fashion and I'm

sure we'll go into the details, but.

411

:

I had to, at the kind of the height of the

peak of my career, completely walk away.

412

:

And, um, it had nothing

to do with the pandemic.

413

:

It had nothing to do with, um, furloughs

or layoffs or success of the business.

414

:

It was purely.

415

:

You know, I had not, I'd lost the ability

to perform, um, in any work setting,

416

:

let alone in an executive level work

setting, um, and had to basically rebuild

417

:

myself from, from the ground up from

scratch, um, and found a new path in

418

:

life, found, found a path as an athlete,

um, found a path as an entrepreneur,

419

:

uh, and found a passion for a new,

um, Um, direction that I could take my

420

:

life from a career perspective, from a

personal perspective, family perspective.

421

:

Tony Tidbit: Well, number one,

thanks buddy for sharing that.

422

:

Um, and there, you said

a lot there, right?

423

:

Because there's a lot of different

things that you were dealing

424

:

with, um, at that time frame.

425

:

And.

426

:

To be fair, and I'd love

to hear your thoughts, Dr.

427

:

Legoy, it seemed like they

all kind of closed in, right?

428

:

All around the same time.

429

:

Well, in other words, you had this, and

then evolved to this, then evolved to

430

:

this, then evolved to that, where you

were like, I can't take it any longer.

431

:

Right?

432

:

We're going back to what we just got

finished talking about earlier, where

433

:

mental health is multiple things, right?

434

:

So it wasn't just because

some of the things that you

435

:

talked about, I can relate to.

436

:

Okay, I've been in that.

437

:

Position.

438

:

I thought like that, but it wasn't

this, then that, then this, then that.

439

:

Right.

440

:

So, Dr.

441

:

talk a little bit about what Matt was

going through and how in society, what do

442

:

you see when these things start happening?

443

:

And more importantly, how could,

um, Not just the individual, they

444

:

may recognize it or they may not.

445

:

They may just think it's a bad day.

446

:

Right.

447

:

And what's some of the things

that they could do before it

448

:

starts spiraling out of control?

449

:

Dr. Patrice LeGoy: Absolutely.

450

:

I think, you know, starting with that,

that feeling of isolation, I think that

451

:

when we are achieving, you know, on that,

that corporate ladder, you, you kind of

452

:

get, um, sold like a bill of goods, right?

453

:

When I get to this point,

it's going to be like this.

454

:

And you guys are like, wait,

why do I, I don't feel good.

455

:

Like I have the title, I have, I have the

salary, but like something, this doesn't

456

:

feel like the way I thought it would.

457

:

And so there's that, that

disappointment, right?

458

:

We feel like, you know,

that we've been bamboozled.

459

:

And so you're like, well, what do I need?

460

:

I don't know what I need because

this is what I've been working for.

461

:

This is the thing that I've been

thinking about and I thought this

462

:

is what success was, you know?

463

:

And I, so I think that is

one thing that can be really

464

:

confusing to a lot of people.

465

:

And I bet Matt, once you got to

that point, you might feel like,

466

:

who's going to be sympathetic to me?

467

:

Who's going to feel bad for me?

468

:

I have this title, you know,

I've, I've achieved this.

469

:

You're an old poor guy, you know?

470

:

And so I think that we, we

hesitate, you know, to share things,

471

:

especially when you're at that level.

472

:

Um, because it seems like this

should be what makes you happy.

473

:

Do you know what I mean?

474

:

Yeah, I think also That combined

with, um, and is connected to having

475

:

your job be such a major part of your

identity that you feel lost without it.

476

:

Like it can cause us to remain

in a situation that is not good

477

:

for us because this is who I am.

478

:

If you ask me who I am, I

tell you what I do, right?

479

:

I did when you first asked me, Tony,

you know, okay, tell us about yourself.

480

:

I started with what I do.

481

:

Um, and I think a lot of us do, you know,

and we probably all heard stories of

482

:

people who Work in a position, retire,

and then a few months later, they have

483

:

to wait like that was their life, right?

484

:

That was their life.

485

:

That was what kept them going.

486

:

And so I think then to tie into, you know,

another point that you made, Matt, is

487

:

not building that support system, right?

488

:

So that it.

489

:

We find ourselves feeling isolated

when we get into that position.

490

:

If we find that, you know, our whole

identity feels like it's our job,

491

:

then we have someone who knows us,

knows that we are not defined by what

492

:

we do, by what our title is, like,

that all kind of needs to happen.

493

:

And I love and appreciate how you.

494

:

Rebuilt that for yourself when

you when you realize this is not

495

:

what it was cracked up to be.

496

:

This is not doing it for me.

497

:

I need to find another way.

498

:

Um, and that's not easy to do.

499

:

You know, I think a lot of people just

keep going, um, and kind of are suffering

500

:

internally without really sharing it.

501

:

So, you know, I think that you

sharing your story can probably make

502

:

a lot of people feel less alone.

503

:

Matt Schuster: It's 100 percent

true and I think the whole concept

504

:

of suffering and silence, um, is.

505

:

There's more people that are

experiencing that than there are not.

506

:

And, um, and a lot of times

they don't even realize it.

507

:

A lot of times it's just been

built as a societal norm.

508

:

Like, oh yeah, this is, um,

it's supposed to feel like this.

509

:

This is what success feels like.

510

:

It's struggle.

511

:

It's hard.

512

:

It's uncomfortable.

513

:

It's lonely.

514

:

And, and then if you go too far and go

over the edge and then you're able to.

515

:

You know, wake up from the matrix, so

to speak, and look like, wait a minute.

516

:

No, life's not supposed to feel like that.

517

:

The structure you built for yourself.

518

:

And, and I phrased that

specifically like that because.

519

:

It's not an organization's job

to make sure that you are taking

520

:

care of your mental health.

521

:

It's your responsibility, just like

it's your responsibility to eat

522

:

healthy and eat your vegetables.

523

:

Um, it is their responsibility

to recognize and support 100%.

524

:

But, um, I think not knowing and not

learning the basics, um, And then

525

:

jumping into all of those, you know,

trials and tribulations of the top.

526

:

Um, you know, there's a lot of people out

there that are, are, are experiencing this

527

:

now and don't even realize that they're,

they're, you know, on this treadmill.

528

:

Um, and, uh, and I think that, you know,

one of the things we'll, I assume we're

529

:

going to get into is kind of how to

recognize it and, you know, what are,

530

:

what are the signs or the symptoms either?

531

:

For you to see it for yourself,

or for you to see it in others

532

:

that may be struggling with it.

533

:

But, um,

534

:

Dr. Patrice LeGoy: yeah, I think that, uh,

you know, it is an important distinction

535

:

between what is like a company's

and organizations responsibility.

536

:

And what is yours?

537

:

I think that organizations can

create environments that are

538

:

more open, um, that people do not

feel like they will be punished.

539

:

Or ignored if they're having

challenges and that part of the

540

:

personal responsibility that

you mentioned is so important.

541

:

Because if I work for a company.

542

:

And they're, they're thinking,

okay, well, let's really prioritize

543

:

mental health and everything.

544

:

And I leave and go to another company, I'm

still bringing my issues with me, right?

545

:

Even the best company

cannot fix that for you.

546

:

They can do things to make that process

easier or, um, normalize that experience.

547

:

And we have to figure out what are the

things that I uniquely as a person need

548

:

to, to move through this moment, to.

549

:

To be ready for the next

challenges that come, right?

550

:

So I think it's really, um, it's

really a partnership with you having

551

:

to be in the driver's seat for sure.

552

:

Tony Tidbit: So Dr.

553

:

LeGoy, thanks for that.

554

:

You too, Matt.

555

:

Let me ask you this,

cause I agree with you.

556

:

They think, well, how much.

557

:

Um, in terms of the company, so when

we and again, we're painting broad

558

:

brushes when we use words like company.

559

:

Okay.

560

:

When we, the company is not

responsible for people's mental health.

561

:

Right?

562

:

Where we should be talking

more or it shouldn't be.

563

:

We should talk more about their manager.

564

:

Right?

565

:

Because if you are a manager, And you're

building relationships, honest, authentic

566

:

relationships with people, right?

567

:

Would that have some type of

effect in terms of people feeling

568

:

a little bit more comfortable?

569

:

Because I've had people on my team and,

and look, you don't know all the time,

570

:

but when you work with somebody over and

over again, you have a relationship and

571

:

then you start seeing them Little quiet,

or maybe a little frantic or something,

572

:

or, you know, they're not speaking out

like they usually speak or whatever.

573

:

You kind of say, Hey,

Matt, let me chat with you.

574

:

Is everything okay?

575

:

Cause you notice something

about that individual.

576

:

So speak a little bit about that in

terms of how, you know, somebody, and

577

:

let's tie that into triggers because

that goes into, you know, what's the

578

:

trigger that somebody should look for.

579

:

All right.

580

:

What's number one.

581

:

What's the trigger that unfortunately

makes the, uh, issues that

582

:

people have from a mental health

standpoint become more stronger?

583

:

And then what's some of the triggers that

as a colleague or a friend that we should

584

:

look forward to in terms of recognizing

there could be an issue regardless

585

:

if somebody says something or not?

586

:

Dr. Patrice LeGoy: I think that what

you're describing, okay, don't don't

587

:

take this analogy the wrong way.

588

:

But, you know, if you're a parent,

it is your responsibility to.

589

:

Model to your child how to

handle conflict, how to deal

590

:

with challenges that they have.

591

:

Right?

592

:

They see you and they will behave as

you do, no matter what you tell them,

593

:

they're going to behave as you do.

594

:

Right?

595

:

So it's really important to model for

them how to work with other people

596

:

who are different than them, you

know, whether they're playing on a

597

:

sports team or that kind of thing.

598

:

When you are a leader of an organization,

I'm not saying your employees, you know,

599

:

your colleagues or children, but I am

saying that you power in a position

600

:

of responsibility to model for them.

601

:

Being a real, genuine, authentic

person in the workplace, right?

602

:

And you're, you're, you're right, Tony.

603

:

I think that, I think

it's a really good point.

604

:

We're not getting every corporation to

change, but the people that work within

605

:

corporations can, can change and it can be

subtle, but there people will know when,

606

:

okay, I feel that my team is, is safe.

607

:

I can share things with that.

608

:

Um, I don't, they're not going to

run to HR and say, you know, I have a

609

:

problem necessarily, but maybe they can.

610

:

Provide resources for me, or

maybe just lend an ear, you know,

611

:

sometimes that's what people need.

612

:

And I think that that

is what managers can do.

613

:

And sometimes, you know, your

coworkers many times, maybe can tie

614

:

into some of the triggers, right?

615

:

Okay.

616

:

This, this person reminds me of my mom

and she always treated me like this.

617

:

And so now my encounters with you, Are

different because I'm carrying my baggage

618

:

that maybe doesn't belong in that space.

619

:

Right?

620

:

But I also think triggers can, you

know, happen from just what we're

621

:

dealing with, you know, every day.

622

:

Like, if I have a fight with my spouse

and I go into work and I feel like

623

:

my boss is giving me a hard time.

624

:

They're not going to understand

where I'm coming from, but because.

625

:

I can't tell you.

626

:

Hey, I just need a second.

627

:

I need to think about that.

628

:

Or I haven't myself figured out how to

manage what's going on with me before

629

:

it's projected on to other people.

630

:

It's going to come into the work triggers

completely different for all of us.

631

:

Um, and we are more easily triggered

when we are not used to being in tune

632

:

with what's happening with ourselves.

633

:

So having are seeing other people do that.

634

:

Tony Tidbit: Matt, what's

your thoughts on that?

635

:

My brother?

636

:

Matt Schuster: No, I think, um,

your point is, is super valid.

637

:

I think it's the, you know, the

organization, the responsibility is

638

:

to be sympathetic and prioritize,

um, a safe space for its employees.

639

:

It's the managers got the

active role, just like in any

640

:

other aspect of management.

641

:

Right.

642

:

It's, it's their job to

actually create that space.

643

:

And that's really the ultimate, um, or

the biggest responsibility that comes from

644

:

the employer, which is, um, can you create

an environment for your employees where

645

:

they're comfortable, where they can speak

up where they can, you know, they have

646

:

resources or someone to reach out to that.

647

:

Won't necessarily negatively

impact their social status or

648

:

their, you know, professional

status within the organization.

649

:

Um, and that, that fear is gone and that

they can, they can be a bit vulnerable.

650

:

Um, that's a, that's a hard thing to

accomplish because it is not just.

651

:

Policy that, that requires human

beings that requires, I mean,

652

:

that's, you know, I wouldn't be

653

:

Tony Tidbit: human beings.

654

:

Right?

655

:

Matt Schuster: Yeah.

656

:

I mean, I mean, that's something that

you did really well as a manager.

657

:

We, we worked directly together for half

a decade and, um, you know, 1 of the

658

:

things that you always, always prioritize

is that no matter what's going on, you

659

:

know, you have to be real with each other

and you have to share what's going on.

660

:

Cause you know, none of us are

as much as we try to be, but

661

:

none of us are mind readers.

662

:

You know, we can't tell what's going

on, but, um, you know, saying that and,

663

:

and acting, um, leading by example and,

you know, being able to be transparent,

664

:

um, you know, those are the things that

the managers, you know, can instill into

665

:

their teams to create that environment.

666

:

Um, I think the, the concept

of triggers or, or signals, um,

667

:

that's an interesting one, right?

668

:

Because we said in the beginning.

669

:

Uh, the people that are suffering

the most show at the least and, you

670

:

know, the, in that sense, one of the

signs actually becomes no sign, right?

671

:

Like, we may not be mind readers, but

we're logical humans and we can see,

672

:

you know, 1 plus 2 plus 3, you know,

this person just lost a big deal.

673

:

Um, you know, just had an argument with

a coworker and just had something else.

674

:

As a human, I can look at that and

go, wow, I'd be pretty stressed out.

675

:

They don't seem stressed out at all.

676

:

Something's probably wrong

because they're masking it or

677

:

hiding it or doing something.

678

:

Um, but you know, we're not,

it's not acceptable to go up

679

:

and be like, Hey, are you okay?

680

:

I know you've been through a

lot, but, um, you know, maybe you

681

:

need to decompress a little bit.

682

:

The natural reaction to that

person is like, nah, I'm fine.

683

:

Don't worry about it.

684

:

Gotta, gotta put on the armor.

685

:

Um, but the reality is

that you can see it.

686

:

Like, uh, if you, if you would be

overwhelmed by something by watching

687

:

it, odds are that the person is

probably a bit overwhelmed, whether

688

:

they want to admit it or not.

689

:

Um, because we are all very

special, but at the same time,

690

:

we're all not all that special.

691

:

We all can react in very

similar ways to stresses.

692

:

So,

693

:

Tony Tidbit: so Dr.

694

:

Legoy, based on what Matt just got,

because that's an excellent point, right?

695

:

Um, you know, most people, when

we look, when we have issues.

696

:

We, we tend to hide them or

do our best and hide them.

697

:

Right?

698

:

Um, we don't let our

emotions get the best of us.

699

:

We always, you know, that.

700

:

And again, this is part of the part

of moving up in an organization

701

:

is being positive, right?

702

:

Overcoming challenges.

703

:

Like, when I was in the army,

nobody wanted to hear about,

704

:

you couldn't hack this.

705

:

This or, uh, you need,

you need a mental break.

706

:

You kidding me?

707

:

And even though you did,

you ain't saying it.

708

:

All right.

709

:

Even though you're scared about the

next drill or whatever the case may be.

710

:

You're not going to tell nobody

that you're going to, I'm okay.

711

:

You know, uh, the, the term I hate

today when I hear people say, Hey,

712

:

how you doing living the dream?

713

:

I'm like, that's the weakest.

714

:

Every time I hear it, I know they lie.

715

:

All right.

716

:

John, why even say it?

717

:

Right.

718

:

But we say it because we want to.

719

:

Project that we're doing okay.

720

:

All right.

721

:

And so, and look, this is a million

books and we as Americans is about

722

:

overcoming and all those type things.

723

:

So talk a little bit

about when somebody does.

724

:

I think that's really the key, right?

725

:

Talk a little bit about what can

you do internally for yourself?

726

:

To try to get yourself out of that,

you may not tell somebody, but

727

:

what can you do mentally to try to

change the course of the situation?

728

:

I talk about from a stress, you

know, that I want to show it, but

729

:

I am stressed out or I'm really, I

lost this deal because I'm no good

730

:

when it had nothing to do with you.

731

:

You know what I'm saying?

732

:

So you're now internalizing this.

733

:

And now it's starting to

spiral out of control.

734

:

Okay.

735

:

So talk about some of the

things people could do.

736

:

Dr. Patrice LeGoy: I think step one is,

is part of what we're trying to do now,

737

:

which is normalizing this conversation.

738

:

There are all kinds of reasons

that people feel like they

739

:

have to keep it to themselves.

740

:

But I think we can all acknowledge we

live in an individualistic society where

741

:

people love self made stories independent.

742

:

I did it on my own.

743

:

Right.

744

:

It's so much in the culture of America.

745

:

Okay.

746

:

Um, it's so celebrated that that doesn't

leave a lot of space for some of the

747

:

more collectivistic virtues of working

as a team, doing things together,

748

:

sharing our challenges and our successes.

749

:

Right?

750

:

That's it's just, this is

the society where we are.

751

:

We can recognize that.

752

:

And then we can think

about how do I make my.

753

:

Microcosm, my team, how do I make it not

like those of the, those are like the

754

:

most, the values that we most focus on.

755

:

Right?

756

:

How do I, how do I make sure that

people understand that I value as

757

:

an individual, but I don't expect

you to do everything by yourself.

758

:

How do we give ourselves that

kind of grace to remember that

759

:

whatever your successes are,

whatever your challenges are.

760

:

There's other people along the way.

761

:

There's other people who

helped you get to that level.

762

:

So you're not alone, right?

763

:

And when you then also, when you are

having a tough time, you're also,

764

:

you also don't need to be alone.

765

:

Um, and I think that a lot of it is just,

um, you know, you mentioned spirals.

766

:

We can get in just a shame spiral

about, I should, I should be good.

767

:

I should be fine.

768

:

I'm just going to act like it is

until hopefully one day I wake

769

:

up and all my problems are gone.

770

:

This doesn't really work like that.

771

:

Sometimes you're having a tough day

and you do feel better the next day.

772

:

But when you are in deep, and as

we were talking earlier, all these

773

:

things are piling on each other.

774

:

You have, there needs to be action

that has to be taken, right?

775

:

We need to be thinking about this

old formula is not working for me.

776

:

No matter how much I've been sold on,

this is, this is the thing I should want.

777

:

And I should be happy at this level.

778

:

I personally, I may need something else.

779

:

How do I figure out what that is?

780

:

How do I give myself space and

grace to figure out what that

781

:

is without feeling bad about it?

782

:

Cause just feeling bad about it

doesn't really like get us, you know,

783

:

moving towards what is healthy for us.

784

:

We just feel bad.

785

:

We just feel bad and, and that is, can

be pAddralyzing for a lot of people.

786

:

BEP Narrator: If you like what you hear

and want to join us on this journey

787

:

of making uncomfortable conversations

comfortable, please subscribe to a

788

:

Black Executive Perspective podcast

on YouTube, Apple Podcasts, Spotify,

789

:

or wherever you get your podcasts.

790

:

Hit subscribe now to stay connected

for more episodes that challenge,

791

:

inspire, and lead the change.

792

:

Matt,

793

:

Tony Tidbit: what's your thoughts on that?

794

:

Matt Schuster: Oh, I have a lot.

795

:

Uh,

796

:

um, I'll, I'll, I'll throw the

caveat out there that what I'm

797

:

about to share is my own experience.

798

:

Um, this is what worked for me

and, um, it may work for you.

799

:

I encourage you to give it a try.

800

:

Um, so the first thing is, you know,

you talked about the shame spiral, um,

801

:

take an inventory of everything that's

going on in your head, in your life,

802

:

you know, Basically your existence and,

and really take a, um, objective point

803

:

of view of what do you have that's,

that's currently happening physically.

804

:

And then what is going on in your head

emotionally and odds are those things

805

:

are probably not going to line up.

806

:

Um, and what that's going to do is

really shine a light on what direction

807

:

your inner monologue is going in.

808

:

Everyone's got an inner dialogue, you

know, whether it's, you know, Man, I

809

:

can't believe I missed that shot when

you were playing golf or whatever, but

810

:

the inner monologue can, can build and

become so loud and it's completely tied

811

:

to your nervous system, whether you're in

a sympathetic or pAddrasympathetic state.

812

:

Um, and if you're in that fight or

flight state, that noise, that, that

813

:

voice is just going to be like, get

out, get out, get out, whatever you do,

814

:

run away, run away, get away from that.

815

:

And it's going to say whatever it

has to, and what ends up happening,

816

:

if you become falling down this

slope, um, into the shame spiral,

817

:

it's just going to latch onto, you

need to get out of that situation.

818

:

So I'm going to tell you the darkest,

dirtiest, most awful things that make you

819

:

never want to go back to that place again.

820

:

And it gets in your ear like when I

was at my lowest point, I would wake

821

:

up and the first thought in my head

was like, You are so bad at your job.

822

:

You're, you're, you're a terrible father.

823

:

You're not even home.

824

:

Like, why do you even exist?

825

:

The only thing you're worth is your

health or your life insurance policy.

826

:

Why don't you just leave that to the kids?

827

:

Like, these are the things

that, this is the noise.

828

:

These are the things that

are said in your head.

829

:

So taking an inventory.

830

:

To understand, all right, what

is actually happening and then

831

:

breaking it down into what of that

can you control and what can't you?

832

:

Because there's always things

that you can control, right?

833

:

Like, all right, I am,

this was my situation.

834

:

I'm completely out of shape.

835

:

I'm 40 pounds overweight.

836

:

My cholesterol is through the roof.

837

:

I'm sleeping four hours a night.

838

:

Um, you know, I'm struggling to get

out of bed, to go to work every day.

839

:

Um, things at work seem to be

going okay, but I feel terrible

840

:

even when the good things happen.

841

:

And, um, you know, I'm not present at

all, really, as a father right now.

842

:

So across that, what can you control?

843

:

Well, you shift over to things, you

know, action is created by action.

844

:

So, all right, I'm going to

start getting into shape.

845

:

I'm going to start making

better eating choices.

846

:

I won't get into the whole connection

between physical health and mental health.

847

:

I think that's a whole different podcast,

but, um, let's start doing the things

848

:

that we can do and then it'll carry over.

849

:

Right.

850

:

All of a sudden things start to

progress and get a little bit better.

851

:

Um, the next big thing

that I did that helped was.

852

:

It's using tactics to approach

hard situations and hard thoughts.

853

:

Uh, and the biggest one that worked for

me was, um, basically a type of reframing.

854

:

So taking a situation that happened

and usually it's the reaction

855

:

was, Oh my God, it's awful.

856

:

I'm terrible.

857

:

I'm just, everything's going to

go down and isolating out the

858

:

emotional reaction and being excited.

859

:

Which.

860

:

Which of these is driven by fear?

861

:

Uh, and which of these is driven

by association with failure?

862

:

And how can I turn those into,

um, actionable and accountable

863

:

steps that I could take?

864

:

Right?

865

:

So like, You know, somebody came in

and one of my managers is having a

866

:

problem with another employee that

they've been having for a long time.

867

:

Initial reaction.

868

:

Oh man, uh, interpersonal conflict.

869

:

I don't know how to deal with this.

870

:

All right, take the fear out.

871

:

What can I actually do?

872

:

Boom, boom, boom, boom,

boom, and then go activate.

873

:

And it's just reframing your perspective

from what you're scared of a situation

874

:

to what you can do about the situation.

875

:

And you apply that across the board.

876

:

Um, and then the, the last big one

was, um, doing a lot of, uh, I guess

877

:

you'd call it mindfulness work.

878

:

So we underestimate this, but taking

10 minutes, 15 minutes to essentially

879

:

try to do a reset, to give your brain

a chance to just, Process things.

880

:

Uh, and this doesn't have

to be full blown meditation.

881

:

This doesn't have to be,

uh, some drawn out thing.

882

:

It could just simply be sitting

in a quiet room for 10 minutes.

883

:

But just sitting down, focusing on

your breathing, letting everything

884

:

calm down, letting yourself reset.

885

:

Um, it was so eye opening the first

time I did it because you come

886

:

out of it just with almost like an

instantaneous different perspective.

887

:

You finally got your body to calm down.

888

:

You finally got your nervous

system to switch over.

889

:

And you can think clearly, you're not

thinking off of, you know, adrenaline

890

:

and cortisol, you're thinking off of,

you know, normal hormonal balance.

891

:

Um, so those are the three

big things that I did.

892

:

And those are the three things

that had the biggest impact for me.

893

:

Um, obviously those

didn't happen overnight.

894

:

They were, you know, built skills that

were built over the course of months.

895

:

Um, but those are some, I

would call them shorter term

896

:

strategies that someone can take.

897

:

Um, to, to apply,

898

:

Dr. Patrice LeGoy: but

899

:

Tony Tidbit: it is awesome.

900

:

Dr.

901

:

LeGoy, what's your thoughts?

902

:

I think those are

903

:

really fantastic strategies.

904

:

And I think that we can think about,

you know, you said, this is just your

905

:

story, but I think that it has broad,

uh, implications, um, are broad,

906

:

um, broad ways to apply it, right?

907

:

Applications.

908

:

Um, I think that something

like deciding that you're going

909

:

to look after your health.

910

:

So by exercising, by eating

well, you're also signaling.

911

:

To yourself, I'm prioritizing me and

I'm prioritizing you, my wellbeing.

912

:

So if you used to be a person

who worked late every night, you

913

:

were prioritizing work, right?

914

:

And you're not, you're not prioritizing

any of those kinds of things.

915

:

Now you've said I am

doing something for me.

916

:

Like it takes a little bit of practice,

but it is so, I'm important or I can't be

917

:

myself if I'm not taking care of my needs.

918

:

Matt Schuster: Yeah.

919

:

Well, so one thing on that,

I have the ultimate test.

920

:

To see if anyone actually does that

If you are someone that uses the

921

:

calendar if you live and die by your

calendar I challenge you to open it up.

922

:

What percentage of the stuff on your

calendar is work related and how

923

:

many things are not work related and

how many things are just for you?

924

:

And I guAddrantee you the vast

majority of people, the only

925

:

stuff on there is work and chores.

926

:

Dr. Patrice LeGoy: For people who are,

927

:

Matt Schuster: there's nothing on there.

928

:

Dr. Patrice LeGoy: That's right.

929

:

Because you're like,

okay, this is important.

930

:

I need to remember cause I'm

going to put it on my calendar.

931

:

What if I scheduled that meditation time?

932

:

You know, Okay.

933

:

Yeah, that's important.

934

:

I blocked out my calendar.

935

:

I prioritize that.

936

:

And I think that I really liked what

you said about The meditation and it

937

:

doesn't need to be done only this way.

938

:

This is the right way to do it.

939

:

This is the wrong way, you

know, an acceptable way.

940

:

It's what works for you.

941

:

Um, making those kinds

of techniques accessible.

942

:

So you might be a person

who is, I can't meditate.

943

:

I can't quiet my brain.

944

:

And maybe, maybe that's

difficult to do now.

945

:

So what is available?

946

:

Is a walk outside available to you?

947

:

Because that's also meditative.

948

:

If you're looking around and you're paying

attention, you're not taking a work call

949

:

while you're going for a walk, right?

950

:

Then that can be meditative.

951

:

Um, so I think making those things

accessible and tailoring them to

952

:

what is available to us and what our

needs are, um, is, is so important.

953

:

Um, rather than trying to do it,

The way that we've been told to do.

954

:

So if I'm not spending 2 hours in

yoga every day, then not, I'm not,

955

:

you know, practicing self care.

956

:

It's like, no, no, it depends on what

I need and what, what fulfills me,

957

:

what, what response to those needs.

958

:

And that's going to be a little bit

different to all of us, but I think that

959

:

overall, that the concepts that you raise.

960

:

Are ones that benefit all of us looking

after yourself, taking time to be

961

:

with yourself, prioritizing those

kinds of things is, is really key.

962

:

Tony Tidbit: Let me, and I,

and he talked about them.

963

:

So how much those things are great,

but what about the self talk as well?

964

:

Right.

965

:

Because you were just saying

earlier, Matt, I'm the worst dad.

966

:

I'm not.

967

:

This right?

968

:

And then you talked about

reprogramming and, you know, a great

969

:

book I read a long time ago is, um,

how to talk to yourself by chat.

970

:

Chad Helmstead.

971

:

I think his name was, and he

talked about our minds are like

972

:

hard drives of a computer and

it only does what you tell it.

973

:

Okay, so if and he used a great example,

because we're creatures of habit and all

974

:

of a sudden, let's use Matt's example.

975

:

Well, you know what?

976

:

I'm not going to I'm not

going to think that way again.

977

:

Right?

978

:

And he use it.

979

:

He comes up with example.

980

:

Like, you have a apartment of old

furniture and you're like, I'm done

981

:

with this and you take all that old

furniture and you put it in the hallway.

982

:

Right?

983

:

Now, you sit in an empty apartment.

984

:

Well, you haven't

replaced it with anything.

985

:

So now you start thinking like, well,

that old couch, wasn't that bad.

986

:

Go grab the old couch

and bring it back in.

987

:

Right.

988

:

Instead of filling it up

with new self talk, right.

989

:

New things.

990

:

I'm not a terrible dad.

991

:

I'm a great dad.

992

:

I'm not tired.

993

:

You know, those little things by

just saying them over and over again.

994

:

Believe it or not.

995

:

So I love to hear you guys's thoughts.

996

:

Matt, Dr.

997

:

Legoy.

998

:

What's your thoughts on self talking?

999

:

Matt Schuster: Yeah, I think the there's

a lot of, there are a lot of books.

:

00:53:05,555 --> 00:53:08,575

Um, there's actually a really

good one called soul for happy.

:

00:53:09,280 --> 00:53:14,740

Um, and it was one of the, um, one

of the big engineers over at Google,

:

00:53:14,840 --> 00:53:21,770

um, he was part of the Google, like,

um, uh, like development teams.

:

00:53:21,770 --> 00:53:25,260

And he said, you know, I wonder if

I could solve for happy, like a math

:

00:53:25,260 --> 00:53:29,290

equation, I'm going to do, but there's

a whole section around self talk.

:

00:53:29,290 --> 00:53:34,330

And the biggest takeaway is

recognizing that by virtue of

:

00:53:34,340 --> 00:53:37,250

hearing it, the talk is not you.

:

00:53:38,385 --> 00:53:41,925

Like, it can't be you because

it's talking to you, but it's in

:

00:53:41,925 --> 00:53:45,535

your head, so you assume and you

associate and identify with it.

:

00:53:45,895 --> 00:53:50,295

But being able to sepAddrate and

understand that whatever voice

:

00:53:50,295 --> 00:53:53,315

is coming in is not your thought.

:

00:53:53,375 --> 00:53:58,135

It's a manifestation off of a

reaction of something going on.

:

00:53:58,675 --> 00:54:04,535

Um, making that disconnection

is step one and it's, it's huge.

:

00:54:05,255 --> 00:54:08,305

Because then you can actually say, like,

all right, I don't need to listen to that.

:

00:54:08,755 --> 00:54:09,675

Because that's not me.

:

00:54:10,255 --> 00:54:14,935

Um, the, the other part of it,

though, is, you know, you need, you

:

00:54:14,935 --> 00:54:20,285

need to do the work so that you can

counterbalance that potential, you

:

00:54:20,285 --> 00:54:24,295

know, one, if you're, if you're doing

these correctly, the self talk is

:

00:54:24,305 --> 00:54:26,025

not as negative, not as strong, but.

:

00:54:26,385 --> 00:54:30,745

Um, you have to do the work to have

other values and points of validation

:

00:54:30,745 --> 00:54:35,865

in your life that, you know, create

all the aspects of who you are.

:

00:54:35,865 --> 00:54:39,455

If you're fully associated to one

thing, if all you are is work.

:

00:54:39,845 --> 00:54:43,855

And then work goes bad, boom, negative

self talk is going to take over all day.

:

00:54:44,465 --> 00:54:48,055

But if you have, if you're a diversified

human being, you know, like a stock

:

00:54:48,055 --> 00:54:53,575

portfolio and, you know, you, your

priorities are broken up as such,

:

00:54:54,295 --> 00:54:58,075

you know, it's hard for anything

to latch on to one specific thing.

:

00:54:58,525 --> 00:55:03,575

So I think it's, you know, identifying

that it's not you and that it is a, it's

:

00:55:03,575 --> 00:55:06,305

a reaction to a stress that's coming in.

:

00:55:06,950 --> 00:55:13,050

But then doing this, the hard work

of, of prioritizing and creating self

:

00:55:13,060 --> 00:55:17,930

values that are tied to the things

that make up who you are and not

:

00:55:17,930 --> 00:55:19,790

necessarily what your output might be.

:

00:55:20,190 --> 00:55:21,260

In a professional setting.

:

00:55:22,750 --> 00:55:23,620

Tony Tidbit: That's awesome, buddy.

:

00:55:23,720 --> 00:55:24,320

That is Dr.

:

00:55:24,320 --> 00:55:25,570

LeGoy anything you want to add to that?

:

00:55:25,640 --> 00:55:27,820

Dr. Patrice LeGoy: I do think

the self talk is so powerful.

:

00:55:27,820 --> 00:55:29,980

And, you know, I've had clients

that would say, you know,

:

00:55:30,020 --> 00:55:31,230

terrible things about themselves.

:

00:55:31,230 --> 00:55:33,200

And it's like, oh, that

sounds really harsh.

:

00:55:33,530 --> 00:55:35,790

I can't imagine you speaking

to like your best friend.

:

00:55:35,790 --> 00:55:37,500

Like, of course, I would never say that.

:

00:55:37,820 --> 00:55:40,475

And if you wouldn't say that to

someone that you care about, Then

:

00:55:40,485 --> 00:55:44,355

how do we show ourselves at least, at

least that same level of care, right?

:

00:55:44,955 --> 00:55:46,425

At the minimum, at the minimum.

:

00:55:46,635 --> 00:55:50,825

And I think sometimes it's valuable for

people to, in order to sepAddrate that

:

00:55:50,875 --> 00:55:52,935

voice to understand where it comes from.

:

00:55:53,155 --> 00:55:55,625

Oh, that's not, that's not actually

the way I feel about myself.

:

00:55:55,625 --> 00:55:57,675

That's maybe some criticism

I heard when I was a kid.

:

00:55:57,960 --> 00:55:58,800

From from that parent.

:

00:55:58,870 --> 00:55:59,900

Okay, I'm not a child anymore.

:

00:55:59,930 --> 00:56:01,210

I don't that doesn't belong to me.

:

00:56:01,450 --> 00:56:02,240

I don't need to hold on to that.

:

00:56:02,270 --> 00:56:06,340

What do I need to as you as you both said,

what what do I need to replace that with?

:

00:56:06,350 --> 00:56:08,930

What is even if you if you,

you know, I'm a therapist.

:

00:56:08,930 --> 00:56:10,450

Sorry, guys, I'm going to

bring it back to childhood.

:

00:56:10,800 --> 00:56:12,830

So, you know, if if the question is.

:

00:56:13,860 --> 00:56:17,350

What would I have liked to hear from my

parent rather than you're not good enough,

:

00:56:17,670 --> 00:56:21,260

you know, that's an a minus, where's the

rest of the a, like that kind of weird,

:

00:56:22,210 --> 00:56:22,480

Matt Schuster: what would I

:

00:56:22,480 --> 00:56:23,290

Dr. Patrice LeGoy: rather have heard?

:

00:56:23,510 --> 00:56:24,450

Did you try your best?

:

00:56:24,710 --> 00:56:25,670

How do you feel about it?

:

00:56:25,780 --> 00:56:26,580

Those kinds of things, right?

:

00:56:26,600 --> 00:56:32,070

Sometimes it requires us to reparent

ourselves and figure out what that message

:

00:56:32,070 --> 00:56:34,660

needs to be to feel good to us, right?

:

00:56:34,670 --> 00:56:36,580

Rather than it's, it's much.

:

00:56:37,285 --> 00:56:41,095

Both easier and more difficult to

keep reclaiming that same old message.

:

00:56:41,535 --> 00:56:46,925

I'm finding what you actually need is a

little bit more work, but obviously, you

:

00:56:46,925 --> 00:56:51,425

know, that's, that's going to be to get us

on that path towards feeling better about

:

00:56:51,435 --> 00:56:53,205

who we are and what we're doing every day.

:

00:56:53,205 --> 00:56:54,525

And that is not related to output.

:

00:56:54,715 --> 00:56:57,019

As you said, sometimes

people who, you know, are.

:

00:56:57,110 --> 00:57:00,240

Achieving the most and

seem fine their output.

:

00:57:00,240 --> 00:57:02,820

You wouldn't know that's not where

you're going to find that fulfillment

:

00:57:02,870 --> 00:57:05,710

It's like how do I feel about a

person when I wake up in the morning?

:

00:57:05,900 --> 00:57:07,140

Do I feel like i'm a good person?

:

00:57:07,340 --> 00:57:07,980

I'm working hard.

:

00:57:08,010 --> 00:57:11,250

I'm trying to be present for my

for my family I'm trying to present

:

00:57:11,260 --> 00:57:15,010

work and each day i'm trying and

each day i'm working on this, right?

:

00:57:15,030 --> 00:57:19,520

That's that's what I think we are

seeking and that's where the self talk

:

00:57:19,520 --> 00:57:22,935

can be So valuable, you know, we usually

talk about self talk as a negative,

:

00:57:22,975 --> 00:57:27,285

but it can be so valuable in, in terms

of, we're not trying to be delusional

:

00:57:27,325 --> 00:57:31,135

about what's happening, but we can

say, I'm on a journey and I look at all

:

00:57:31,135 --> 00:57:32,335

these steps, I'm taking these steps.

:

00:57:32,735 --> 00:57:37,635

To get to get me closer to where I

feel like I'm healthy and I'm well

:

00:57:37,635 --> 00:57:40,055

and I'm present for everyone around me

:

00:57:41,105 --> 00:57:41,975

Tony Tidbit: Right, right.

:

00:57:41,975 --> 00:57:46,055

That is awesome Final question as

we close for both of you guys and

:

00:57:46,055 --> 00:57:47,525

it's the same question, right?

:

00:57:47,895 --> 00:57:53,535

You know, obviously We all know that

a lot of people in the workplace,

:

00:57:54,015 --> 00:57:55,735

um, deal with these things.

:

00:57:56,125 --> 00:57:56,855

Okay.

:

00:57:57,105 --> 00:58:01,965

Um, look, I, I, I'm sitting here

listening and I'm nodding and,

:

00:58:01,975 --> 00:58:06,515

and Matt, you know, I've, I've had

some of those situations, right?

:

00:58:06,515 --> 00:58:08,515

And I may have some in

the future as well, right?

:

00:58:08,515 --> 00:58:11,525

Because we're, we're human

and we're going to have those

:

00:58:11,535 --> 00:58:13,425

emotional ups and downs and stuff.

:

00:58:13,755 --> 00:58:15,315

So, I would love to hear from both of you.

:

00:58:15,315 --> 00:58:16,615

I'll start with you first, Dr.

:

00:58:16,615 --> 00:58:17,035

Legoy.

:

00:58:17,035 --> 00:58:20,145

We're going to What is something

that, what advice would you give to

:

00:58:20,145 --> 00:58:26,825

supervisors at companies that they can

help support their team's mental health?

:

00:58:27,325 --> 00:58:30,165

So, you know, it does

inspire out of controls.

:

00:58:30,165 --> 00:58:31,215

I want to hear from you on that.

:

00:58:31,215 --> 00:58:33,785

And then Matt, obviously, since

you've been in, I'd love to

:

00:58:33,785 --> 00:58:34,635

hear your thoughts as well.

:

00:58:34,635 --> 00:58:35,197

I

:

00:58:35,197 --> 00:58:39,694

Dr. Patrice LeGoy: think that sometimes

when someone's struggling, uh, we

:

00:58:40,635 --> 00:58:43,435

sometimes don't say or do anything because

we don't know the right thing to say.

:

00:58:43,755 --> 00:58:46,665

And I think sometimes it's

powerful to acknowledge.

:

00:58:47,490 --> 00:58:50,090

You're supervisor of people, right?

:

00:58:50,180 --> 00:58:52,570

That doesn't mean that

you're a trained therapist.

:

00:58:52,590 --> 00:58:53,800

You don't need to have all the answers.

:

00:58:53,800 --> 00:58:56,240

You don't need to solve

the problem for people.

:

00:58:56,590 --> 00:58:57,910

Um, and I think just.

:

00:58:58,420 --> 00:59:01,410

Acknowledging that takes a lot of the

pressure off and maybe people would

:

00:59:01,420 --> 00:59:04,530

be more comfortable going and saying,

Hey, you know, is anything going on?

:

00:59:04,540 --> 00:59:05,280

Do you want to talk?

:

00:59:05,280 --> 00:59:07,010

Or, you know, is there

anything that I can do?

:

00:59:07,360 --> 00:59:08,050

It's not that.

:

00:59:08,370 --> 00:59:09,419

Oh, you should do this.

:

00:59:09,420 --> 00:59:10,050

Do you do this?

:

00:59:10,050 --> 00:59:10,670

You'll feel better.

:

00:59:10,810 --> 00:59:13,590

I need to know that before I go

into this conversation with someone.

:

00:59:13,810 --> 00:59:18,600

And I think having those kinds

of, of open kind of dialogues.

:

00:59:18,950 --> 00:59:22,490

Is something that supervisors can

do without feeling like they need to

:

00:59:22,500 --> 00:59:24,510

know everything, all the next steps.

:

00:59:24,570 --> 00:59:28,420

And sometimes I think because, you

know, you talked about solving for

:

00:59:28,420 --> 00:59:31,700

happiness because you're in that setting

where it's like, here's a problem.

:

00:59:31,720 --> 00:59:32,680

Let me find a solution.

:

00:59:33,035 --> 00:59:36,145

It's it can be hard to to train

our brains out of doing that.

:

00:59:36,315 --> 00:59:37,795

No, I'm in front of a person.

:

00:59:38,135 --> 00:59:39,295

You're not a problem.

:

00:59:39,335 --> 00:59:40,175

You're a person.

:

00:59:40,185 --> 00:59:41,665

You might be going

through some challenges.

:

00:59:41,885 --> 00:59:43,155

How do we talk about it?

:

00:59:43,285 --> 00:59:43,945

How do we talk about it?

:

00:59:43,965 --> 00:59:44,855

We're not trying to solve it.

:

00:59:44,855 --> 00:59:46,105

We're not trying to fix you.

:

00:59:46,185 --> 00:59:46,555

Right?

:

00:59:46,555 --> 00:59:47,285

You're not broken.

:

00:59:47,485 --> 00:59:49,675

We're just we're just trying to

address what's happening here.

:

00:59:49,835 --> 00:59:50,867

And I think that.

:

00:59:52,315 --> 00:59:55,285

Normalizing those kinds of conversations

can relieve a lot of the pressure because

:

00:59:55,695 --> 00:59:58,745

people often think it's not that they

don't speak up because they don't care.

:

00:59:58,995 --> 01:00:00,265

It's because they don't know what to do.

:

01:00:00,695 --> 01:00:02,985

And so they don't want to say

the wrong thing and mess you

:

01:00:02,985 --> 01:00:04,382

up and all that kind of stuff.

:

01:00:04,382 --> 01:00:07,725

So they just don't say anything and they,

and they ignore, like, you were talking

:

01:00:07,725 --> 01:00:09,575

about Matt, some of those signs or signs.

:

01:00:09,615 --> 01:00:11,145

Oh, that's that seems off.

:

01:00:11,215 --> 01:00:12,905

You know, I think, yeah,

that seems really stressful.

:

01:00:12,905 --> 01:00:14,105

They're not acting like anything's fine.

:

01:00:14,315 --> 01:00:14,725

They ignore because.

:

01:00:14,725 --> 01:00:20,725

It's scary to help in

that position, um, to.

:

01:00:21,280 --> 01:00:26,100

To say, I see you, you know,

and, and I'm here really.

:

01:00:26,150 --> 01:00:29,430

And, you know, I think that sometimes

that is all that people really need

:

01:00:29,920 --> 01:00:33,840

is to know that someone sees them and,

and then you're planning a seat, right?

:

01:00:33,840 --> 01:00:36,980

You're planning a seat where they're, Oh,

you know what, I'm going to stop ignoring

:

01:00:36,980 --> 01:00:38,280

that thing that's going on with me.

:

01:00:38,420 --> 01:00:41,900

Maybe I will go and talk to someone, you

know, so and so said, yeah, you know,

:

01:00:42,120 --> 01:00:43,610

they're there, maybe I'll go talk to them.

:

01:00:43,610 --> 01:00:45,670

Maybe, you know, maybe we'll go

out to lunch and I'll share a

:

01:00:45,670 --> 01:00:46,960

little bit about what's going on.

:

01:00:47,300 --> 01:00:51,970

Um, I think that removing some of that

burden of having the right answers.

:

01:00:52,300 --> 01:00:55,700

Um, is something that's really

valuable for us to all keep in

:

01:00:55,700 --> 01:00:58,240

mind, you know, leaders are not

leaders, just as people in life.

:

01:00:58,610 --> 01:01:00,080

Um, I think it's really helpful

:

01:01:02,780 --> 01:01:03,320

Tony Tidbit: going, Matt.

:

01:01:03,370 --> 01:01:03,940

Go ahead, buddy.

:

01:01:04,100 --> 01:01:05,560

Matt Schuster: I was gonna

say that's so spot on.

:

01:01:05,770 --> 01:01:11,280

Like, that's right on exactly, uh,

exactly what I would have said.

:

01:01:11,310 --> 01:01:14,590

It's, you know, create creating space.

:

01:01:14,590 --> 01:01:17,079

And, um, I think that 1 of the.

:

01:01:18,550 --> 01:01:24,240

As, as you know, you know, type A

individuals tend to move up into

:

01:01:24,240 --> 01:01:27,370

more leadership roles because they

have the drive and the, and the inner

:

01:01:27,370 --> 01:01:33,260

push and being type A also comes with

this, um, I can fix every problem.

:

01:01:33,320 --> 01:01:34,420

And Dr.

:

01:01:34,420 --> 01:01:39,740

LeGoy said, um, perfectly, which is, this

is not necessarily a problem to solve.

:

01:01:39,780 --> 01:01:43,950

It's just, can you create a space for the.

:

01:01:44,450 --> 01:01:47,590

Relief valve so they can

just share and speak.

:

01:01:47,990 --> 01:01:54,030

Um, I think 1 of the things are 1

of the skills that, um, any manager

:

01:01:54,030 --> 01:02:00,060

needs to practice or learn, though,

is to understand, expect that

:

01:02:00,130 --> 01:02:02,930

everyone's got something going on and.

:

01:02:03,730 --> 01:02:07,110

You know, you, you may be shocked,

they may share a ton, they may share a

:

01:02:07,110 --> 01:02:11,580

little, but you can't necessarily, you

have to expect that you're going to hear

:

01:02:11,580 --> 01:02:16,170

something and you can't let it impact

your opinion, position, or how you treat

:

01:02:16,170 --> 01:02:20,110

that person, you know, the whole idea

of creating that safe space means that

:

01:02:20,110 --> 01:02:23,790

they can share, I mean, within reason,

there's, you're not going to share their

:

01:02:23,790 --> 01:02:28,050

whole life story, but, um, they can

share their inner thoughts and feelings

:

01:02:28,050 --> 01:02:31,090

about things going on in the workplace

or things that may be troubling them,

:

01:02:31,500 --> 01:02:32,890

uh, and they're not going to be judged.

:

01:02:33,485 --> 01:02:38,125

Uh, and it's not going to negatively

impact, um, you know, their day to day.

:

01:02:38,745 --> 01:02:42,905

And once you create that, then, you know,

they're going to feel more comfortable

:

01:02:42,915 --> 01:02:44,495

to do so going forward and in the future.

:

01:02:45,095 --> 01:02:49,275

And, um, yeah, I, I, like I

said, I a hundred percent agree.

:

01:02:49,275 --> 01:02:51,705

I think it's, it is a

different skillset though.

:

01:02:51,755 --> 01:02:56,095

I think it is something that as a

manager, you need to learn how to

:

01:02:56,095 --> 01:03:01,875

create that space, how to, you know,

sometimes it's showing vulnerability

:

01:03:01,875 --> 01:03:04,675

to earn shared vulnerability.

:

01:03:05,185 --> 01:03:07,765

So opening up a little bit

yourself so that they feel

:

01:03:07,765 --> 01:03:08,955

comfortable opening up with you.

:

01:03:09,555 --> 01:03:12,395

Um, and, and that can go a long way.

:

01:03:12,425 --> 01:03:17,105

But, um, when we go back to employers,

what they can do, you know, that's

:

01:03:17,125 --> 01:03:21,055

part of what they can do to help

make better managers is giving

:

01:03:21,055 --> 01:03:25,155

them resources to train and learn

how to, how to create that space.

:

01:03:25,665 --> 01:03:28,045

Um, because we're not talking about

something that's performance based.

:

01:03:28,055 --> 01:03:29,645

It's not like do your job better.

:

01:03:29,655 --> 01:03:29,985

It's.

:

01:03:31,470 --> 01:03:37,280

Uh, okay, you know, being, um,

uh, uh, a human being with a high

:

01:03:37,290 --> 01:03:40,010

EQ and how can we do that better?

:

01:03:40,550 --> 01:03:41,520

Tony Tidbit: Right, right.

:

01:03:41,610 --> 01:03:45,520

Well, look, I want to thank

both of you guys for coming on

:

01:03:45,530 --> 01:03:48,340

the Black Executive Perspective

podcast to talk about this topic.

:

01:03:48,750 --> 01:03:50,760

This is something that transcends race.

:

01:03:50,780 --> 01:03:52,990

This is something that every

human being goes through.

:

01:03:53,480 --> 01:03:56,000

Um, this is something we'll

continue to go through as being

:

01:03:56,000 --> 01:03:57,770

human beings as we walk the earth.

:

01:03:58,235 --> 01:04:02,825

In our journey, but I appreciate you

guys providing number 1 being vulnerable

:

01:04:02,825 --> 01:04:07,905

and sharing and be an example of the

things that you're just get the advice

:

01:04:07,905 --> 01:04:12,965

you just gave for managers or leaders

to be able to do and not even managers

:

01:04:12,965 --> 01:04:14,465

and leaders, even family members.

:

01:04:14,465 --> 01:04:15,985

You know, it reminds me of a story.

:

01:04:16,335 --> 01:04:18,695

A friend of mine talked about when.

:

01:04:19,145 --> 01:04:20,575

He somebody passed away.

:

01:04:20,575 --> 01:04:21,835

I think his father passed away.

:

01:04:22,355 --> 01:04:26,375

And typically when people pass

away, uh, you find a friend,

:

01:04:26,525 --> 01:04:28,285

somebody in the family passed away.

:

01:04:28,535 --> 01:04:33,105

People are nervous to come around them

because they are afraid of what to say.

:

01:04:33,515 --> 01:04:34,025

Okay.

:

01:04:34,025 --> 01:04:35,385

So they stay away.

:

01:04:35,705 --> 01:04:37,575

And I never forgot what he said.

:

01:04:37,585 --> 01:04:41,225

He said, listen, you don't

have to say anything.

:

01:04:41,745 --> 01:04:43,065

Just be there.

:

01:04:43,585 --> 01:04:44,275

Okay.

:

01:04:44,375 --> 01:04:51,065

And by being there speaks loudly, and

it's the support the person needs,

:

01:04:51,335 --> 01:04:54,595

you know, so it's the same way in

terms of what you guys talked about.

:

01:04:54,595 --> 01:04:57,415

We talk about at work issues is.

:

01:04:57,779 --> 01:04:58,920

You ain't got to solve it.

:

01:04:59,150 --> 01:05:00,800

Just be open to listen.

:

01:05:01,590 --> 01:05:07,210

Okay, that's part of being there

because just by listening It provides

:

01:05:07,210 --> 01:05:12,990

an outlet for that person and they're

not dealing with it on their own

:

01:05:13,370 --> 01:05:17,860

So I want to thank you both again

Stay right where you are because dr.

:

01:05:17,860 --> 01:05:22,240

Legoy and matt are going to help us

with our call to action But before I

:

01:05:22,250 --> 01:05:25,790

think it's now time for tony's tidbit.

:

01:05:25,810 --> 01:05:30,635

So the tidbit today Based on what

we talked about is this when we

:

01:05:30,635 --> 01:05:34,835

speak about our mental health

struggles, we're not showing weakness

:

01:05:35,325 --> 01:05:37,195

or opening the door for strength.

:

01:05:37,815 --> 01:05:43,395

support and understanding to

enter our professional lives.

:

01:05:43,805 --> 01:05:46,105

And you heard that today from Dr.

:

01:05:46,105 --> 01:05:47,305

LeGoy and Matt Schuster.

:

01:05:47,345 --> 01:05:48,535

So we want to thank them.

:

01:05:48,725 --> 01:05:52,915

And here, the other reminder,

don't miss, you know, our weekly

:

01:05:52,975 --> 01:05:54,915

segment called need to know by Dr.

:

01:05:54,915 --> 01:05:59,095

Nsenga Burton on a black

executive perspective podcast, Dr.

:

01:05:59,095 --> 01:06:03,285

Burton dives into timely and crucial

topics that shape our communion world.

:

01:06:03,605 --> 01:06:06,654

You don't want to miss these little

tidbits that she's throwing out.

:

01:06:06,904 --> 01:06:07,165

It's.

:

01:06:07,290 --> 01:06:08,320

every Thursday.

:

01:06:08,450 --> 01:06:10,480

So make sure you check out need to know.

:

01:06:10,730 --> 01:06:15,130

I hope you enjoyed today's episode

discussing, discussing mental

:

01:06:15,140 --> 01:06:17,540

health challenges in the workplace.

:

01:06:17,760 --> 01:06:21,230

So now it's time for BEP's call to action.

:

01:06:21,520 --> 01:06:26,430

As you, as our frequent listeners

know, our goal, our mission is to

:

01:06:26,430 --> 01:06:29,630

decrease all levels of discrimination.

:

01:06:29,910 --> 01:06:31,150

All across the world.

:

01:06:31,430 --> 01:06:33,660

So our call to action is called LESS.

:

01:06:34,150 --> 01:06:35,870

L E S S.

:

01:06:36,320 --> 01:06:37,990

And L stands for learn.

:

01:06:37,990 --> 01:06:42,230

So the first thing you want to

learn and teach yourself about

:

01:06:42,240 --> 01:06:44,340

racial and cultural nuances.

:

01:06:44,610 --> 01:06:46,180

Learn about mental health.

:

01:06:46,230 --> 01:06:49,270

All different type of things

that you're not used to that's

:

01:06:49,270 --> 01:06:52,050

going to help enlighten you.

:

01:06:52,440 --> 01:06:54,360

Matt Schuster: So then

E stands for empathize.

:

01:06:55,600 --> 01:06:59,260

And that's to understand diverse

and different perspectives

:

01:07:00,750 --> 01:07:04,480

Dr. Patrice LeGoy: is for share, um,

sharing your stories to enlighten

:

01:07:04,480 --> 01:07:10,810

others, sharing your insights, um,

and not being afraid to be open

:

01:07:10,840 --> 01:07:12,620

and vulnerable with your story.

:

01:07:14,170 --> 01:07:14,870

Tony Tidbit: Absolutely.

:

01:07:14,870 --> 01:07:15,160

Dr.

:

01:07:15,160 --> 01:07:16,900

LeGoy and the final S is stop.

:

01:07:17,290 --> 01:07:21,820

You want to actively to stop all

discrimination as it walks in your path.

:

01:07:22,110 --> 01:07:25,360

So if uncle John says something

at the Thanksgiving table, that's

:

01:07:25,370 --> 01:07:30,690

inappropriate, you say, uncle John,

we don't believe that we don't say

:

01:07:30,690 --> 01:07:32,760

that, and you stop it right there.

:

01:07:32,980 --> 01:07:39,790

So if everyone can incorporate less L E

S S, this will help us build a more fair,

:

01:07:39,790 --> 01:07:42,185

more More understanding world, right?

:

01:07:42,235 --> 01:07:45,625

And more importantly, we'll be able

to see the change that we want to

:

01:07:45,625 --> 01:07:48,725

see because less will become more.

:

01:07:49,285 --> 01:07:52,685

So don't forget to tune into our next

episode of a black executive protective

:

01:07:52,685 --> 01:07:57,505

podcast, wherever you get your podcast,

and you can follow us on our social

:

01:07:57,505 --> 01:08:03,875

channels of LinkedIn X, YouTube, Tik

TOK, Instagram, and Facebook at a

:

01:08:03,875 --> 01:08:07,315

black exec for our fabulous guests, Dr.

:

01:08:07,535 --> 01:08:08,225

Patrice.

:

01:08:08,225 --> 01:08:09,395

LeGoy.

:

01:08:09,690 --> 01:08:14,580

Matt Schuster, co founder of Addra Labs,

the greatest protein bar on the planet.

:

01:08:14,740 --> 01:08:15,700

Definitely check it out.

:

01:08:16,029 --> 01:08:17,350

I'm Tony tidbit.

:

01:08:17,630 --> 01:08:18,779

We talked about it.

:

01:08:18,779 --> 01:08:19,290

Guess what?

:

01:08:19,300 --> 01:08:21,220

We learned about it today.

:

01:08:21,560 --> 01:08:22,609

We love you.

:

01:08:22,770 --> 01:08:23,510

And guess what?

:

01:08:23,660 --> 01:08:24,149

We're out

:

01:08:28,810 --> 01:08:31,399

BEP Narrator: a black

executive perspective.

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